Chapter 28

Boredom Kills


Naruto never knew that being out at sea could be so boring.

Having spent a number of times at sea before coming to this world, he'd always assumed that being on a ship was supposed to be a fun experience. Exciting. An adventure. He remembered his two times at sea back in the Elemental Nations. During his time traveling with the prince of the Moon Kingdom, the trip across the ocean had been one big party, and during his time with princess Koyuki, he'd been able to watch a group of movie stars make a movie. Both times had been a blast.

I feel like a small part of my childhood has just died.

The first few days on this ship had been nothing but a drag. Neither he nor Cloud were allowed to go outside, and when they did get out, it was only to patrol certain areas of the vessel—none of which were important. Naruto hadn't even been up on the deck yet. They'd stuck him and Cloud in the lower levels, patrolling the corridors and cargo bay. It really sucked.

I hope the others are having a better time than us.

Naruto toyed with the idea of replacing himself with a clone and going off to explore, but he discarded it after some contemplation. Not only would it be unfair to Cloud if he left the poor guy, they were surrounded by enemies, so the chances of something happening to them increased if they were alone. It would be better to remain in pairs so that, on the off chance that they were discovered, they would have someone to watch their backs.

That still didn't change the fact that the situation sucked.

"Hey, Cloud?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm bored."

They were in the small cabin space given to their squad. No one else was around at the moment, and Naruto was laying on his bunk, staring at the ceiling. Because they weren't on patrol or guard duty, and it wasn't time for them to eat, neither he nor Cloud were allowed to leave this spot.

Naruto was sure he could have left anyway, but if he snuck out, then Cloud would be alone. He wasn't such a jerk that he would let a friend suffer being by themselves while he went off on an adventure.

Lying on his back, his hands behind his head, Cloud grimaced.

"Me too."

"Did you ever have to do stuff like this when you were in SOLDIER?"

"Sometimes, but not often. SOLDIER is different from the rank and file members of Shinra's army. Since we're used for special missions that involve high levels of danger, we don't typically get duties that are this normal—unless there are extenuating circumstances, of course. Even then, we were given a lot more freedom and never had to follow protocol."

"I see."

Silence descended again. He and Cloud had already done everything they could think of doing to stave off the boredom, from telling stories to playing stupid games. Now they had nothing to do.

The creaking of unoiled hinges alerted Naruto to someone entering the room.

"Hey, rookies."

Naruto and Cloud looked at the door to see their "commanding officer" standing there.

"You two are on guard duty today. Get up to the bridge pronto."

"Guard duty?" Naruto blinked, then grinned. "Oh, hell yes! No more boring patrols for us!"

Naruto and Cloud leapt from their beds and shared a high-five before exiting the small cabin space. They traveled through the ship's interior, their boots clanking against the metal floor. The entrance to the bridge was on the deck, so they traveled up a stairwell and onto the deck, where Naruto was pleased to be greeted by a bright blue sky.

"Oh, sky, how I've missed thee."

Cloud snorted. "You're such a weird guy. Who gets happy over something so simple?"

"Hey! When you're stuck inside of a ship for several days, getting outside and seeing the sky is a blessing."

"Right."

As they walked along the wooden deck, Naruto observed the many workers running to and fro. Among them, two stood out the most—a guy who looked like he'd fall over any minute and had red fur poking out of his sailor suit, and a large black man who scowled upon noticing them.

"'Bout time you fools showed yer faces!"

"Barrett," Naruto greeted with a cheerful smile. "How are you this lovely day?"

"You messin' wit' me, punk?!" Barrett shook his fists at Naruto.

"Has there been any unusual activity?" asked Cloud.

"Nah, everythin' been quiet up here. We ain't had any weird shit goin' on."

"What about the others?" Naruto inquired. "Have you seen them?"

"Sure, plenty o' times. They been around. Aerith and Tifa are part of the cleaning crew, so they come up sometimes to swab the decks an' shit. Don' know where yer little ninja is, though. She's damn but disappeared."

"I'm sure she's around somewhere," Naruto said airily, eyes turning toward the mast, where he saw a human-shaped shadow moving around.

"We need to get to the bridge," Cloud said.

"Right. Let's go."

The bridge was large, and yet despite that, it seemed almost confined. Naruto blamed it on all of the people and work stations. It had two levels and a staircase on either side of the captain's chair, which stood at the helm. The stairs led down to the bottom floor. Most of the work stations were located down there, and several people were manning those stations. They sat in front of consoles, typing away on keyboards or monitoring radar screens. At the very front was the pilot and co-pilot seats, which were occupied by two sailors.

After exchanging salutes with the two soldiers they were to replace, Naruto and Cloud took up position on either side of the door. Knowing better than to just let himself grow bored and fall asleep, Naruto took to observing his surroundings.

This bridge was very defensible, as expected of a military vessel created by Shinra. The command chair sat on the second floor, and Naruto noticed slots in the floor. No doubt steel walls would jut from those slots if the bridge ever came under attack. They would create choke points that people invading the bridge would be funneled to, allowing the defenders to slaughter their enemies one at a time. Combine that with the lack of ambush spots and you had an easily defendable location.

The door he was guarding slid open. He and Cloud snapped to attention as President Rufus walked in with two other people; Heidegger and an individual whose face remained hidden within the shadows of their cloak. Because of how large the cloak was, the person's identity remained ambiguous. Naruto couldn't even tell if they were male or female.

"Gya ha ha ha! Are we still on course?" Heidegger asked the helmsmen.

"Sir, yes sir!"

"Gya ha ha ha! Good, good!"

"Stop laughing like an idiot," Rufus said coldly. "It's annoying."

"Gurk!"

"Do we know Sephiroth's current heading?" Rufus ignored Heidegger's choked cough.

"We have not been able to track him. However, there are only a few places that he can travel to. If the rumors are true, and he has traveled to the Western Continent, then his only option is to travel to the Gold Saucer and cross the desert from there."

"I assumed as much."

Rufus continued to talk, but Naruto only paid a bit of attention. They already had their next destination. This Gold Saucer place. He didn't know what it was, or even where it was, but it didn't really matter. If Sephiroth was going there, then that's where they would need to travel to next.

Hours passed. He tried to occupy himself by imagining pranks that he could play on the Turks when they returned to Midgar, but even so, he was so bored. Naruto couldn't fathom how anyone could do this all day without contemplating hanging themselves to escape this dull state of being.

Perhaps it was because he was so bored that Naruto felt the eyes on him. There was no killing intent in this gaze. It felt more like curiosity.

Naruto searched out the source of the eyes.

And found his breath stolen from him.

Staring out at him from beneath a hood of darkness were two blood red eyes with three black tomoe.

XoX

A pair of guards came several hours later to relieve Naruto and Cloud of their duty. While Naruto was grateful to be finished with such a boring assignment—he'd soon determined that patrol was better than silently standing in place for hours on end—he couldn't shake the dread that filled him at the sight of those Sharingan eyes.

While he'd done his best to quell his emotions, all throughout his time on the bridge, he'd felt those eyes boring into him. It had been maddening. To be so close to those eyes and not be able to do a damn thing about it. He hated that feeling.

Before leaving the bridge, he took one last look at the person with eyes that should not have existed in this world, and then he followed Cloud onto the deck.

"Are you alright, Naruto?"

I should have guessed that Cloud would know I was acting weird. He and Cloud had been spending a lot of time together, and they really were awfully similar—spiky blond hair aside. It only made sense that his friend would notice when he was feeling off. Sometimes Cloud was too perceptive for his own good.

"No," Naruto sighed, "I'm not fine."

Cloud, having clearly not expected such a response, needed a moment to regain his bearings. "I noticed that you were looking at the person guarding President Rufus. Is there something about him that bothers you?"

"You could say that," Naruto smiled mirthlessly. He couldn't believe someone in this world had the Sharingan. Where did they get it? How did they get it?

Could it be… Sasuke?

Naruto was aware of the possibility that Sasuke could have also been sent to this world. They had both been caught within Tobi's trap. If Naruto survived, than it stood to reason that Sasuke survived as well. Yet even then, the idea that Sasuke was also in this world had never crossed his mind. He'd never even fathomed it.

Cloud seemed to realize that he didn't want to talk about it and wisely stopped asking questions. They continued on in silence for a while before Naruto abruptly stopped.

"Something wrong?"

"You go on ahead," Naruto said when Cloud turned to look at him. "There's something I need to check out."

A protest seemed ready to escape him, but Cloud slowly shut his mouth and nodded.

"Okay. We're not on duty now anyway, so it should be fine."

"Thanks."

Naruto watched Cloud walk off, then he changed direction and entered the interior through another door. He traveled down straight corridors and stepped aside when people ran past him. Descending down several flights of stairs, Naruto eventually reached the cargo bay doors, which he moved through quickly.

The cargo bay was filled to the brim with massive metal boxes that gleamed a dull grayish blue. They were stacked one on top of the other, looming over him, casting his entire body in shadow, and ensuring that Naruto couldn't see over them. In between stacks of boxes were ailes that he could move down, each of them connected to a large walkway in the center of the room through which lift machines could move.

The cargo bay was empty right now. No one was present as he walked down deserted aisles. Even the staff who normally checked their supplies was missing. Looking up, Naruto spotted a large walkway that traversed across the entire cargo bay from one side to the other.

He wasn't alone. Naruto could feel the presence of someone following him. He couldn't pinpoint their location. Whoever was spying on him knew how to mask their presence.

What should I do?

Naruto could simply demand a confrontation, but that wasn't his style anymore. He used to do that back when he was younger, and while it had worked for a time, it stopped working after people learned not to underestimate him. Here, in this place, if someone meant him harm, than chances were he wouldn't be underestimated.

Closing his eyes, Naruto extended his senses, searching for the person spying on him. Even in this land, a place where people couldn't use chakra, they still held a unique presence. Each person felt distinct, and while finding someone who couldn't use chakra was difficult, it was not impossible.

Naruto found the person following him easily.

This person had a very distinct signature.

They can use chakra!

Naruto spun around and threw a kunai into a spot on the ceiling. Clang! The kunai was quickly deflected by something that wasn't there. Sparks flew as, like a mirage, a figure appeared from thin air and dropped from the ceiling. Naruto threw several more kunai, but each one was deflected by the figure wearing a dark black cloak—a figure whose blood red eyes sent chills down his spine. The figure landed on the ground, cloak flaring around them, exhaled a deep breath, then spewed a massive ball of fire from their mouth.

"Katon: Gokyaku no Jutsu (Fire Release: Grand Fireball Jutsu)!"

Clicking his tongue, Naruto switched out his current materia for a water materia.

"Suiton: Suryuudan no Jutsu (Water Release: Water Dragon Jutsu)!"

A massive jet of water appeared in front of Naruto, formed into the shape of a dragon with glowing yellow eyes, and charged the fireball. Slamming into each other, the two techniques canceled each other out. Steam exploded from their impact, covering the entire area in a thick layer of fog.

Naruto switched his water materia for his wind materia.

"Fuuton: Urukaku no Jutsu (Wind Release: Ultra Sensory Jutsu)!"

A map quickly formed in his mind, generated by the wind sonar that he'd created. With it, Naruto could easily tell his foe's current location.

He switched out wind with lightning.

"Raiton: Kuropansa (Lightning Release: Black Panther)!"

A panther darker than twilight burst forth from the nether. Dark purple lightning skittered across its surface. With a mighty roar, it rushed toward where Naruto sensed his enemy, slamming into a crate and exploding in a flurry of sparks and crackling thunder. By this point in time, the steam had evaporated, so Naruto could see where his attack had struck.

There was nothing there.

Nothing but a log.

Replacement!

"Katon: Goryuuka no Jutsu (Fire Release: Great Fire Dragon Jutsu)!"

A roar of searing heat burned Naruto's back. He spun around to see a giant fireball in the shape of a dragon's head tearing towards him. There wasn't enough time to replace his materia, and lightning wasn't effective against fire, so Naruto did the only thing he could think of.

"Shiva! Come forth!"

The materia embedded into the back of his hand glowed brightly, an icy blue that flared to life. The fireball slammed against a wall of ice, exploding and sending a shockwave through the cargo bay. Loud squealing issued from metal crates as they were blasted apart. The metal ground melted, and then a floor made of shimmering frozen liquid formed over the hole.

Shiva appeared before him. Her glory was resplendent. Wreathed in ice, her pale blue skin shone with an effervescent sheen, and her snow white hair, done up in braids, gave her a queenly appearance. Truly, the title Queen of Ice and Darkness suited this otherworldly being well.

"You called, my young summoner, and I have answered. Oh, my. It seems you've gotten into a bit of trouble."

"Well, I have a few techniques that I could have used to protect myself, but they would have destroyed most of the cargo bay," Naruto admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "I was hoping to avoid that."

Shiva sent him an amused glance, then looked around, her amusement growing.

"I hate to tell you this, but you might have been better of using whatever technique you have."

Naruto observed his surroundings. It did seem as if a tornado had come through here. Some crates were tipped over, others destroyed. The ground was scorched, except for where Shiva's ice had frozen it, leaving a glassy sheen along the surface. Even the walls had suffered. Cracks spread along the walls, which were bowed outwards as if an incredible force had bent them. The heat must have melted the metal walls, while the intense expulsion of air had caused them to bend, and the freezing chill made cracks spread along their surface.

After studying the room for a moment longer, Naruto shook his head.

"No, it's definitely better this way. If I had used my technique, this entire room would be sitting on the bottom of the ocean right now."

Shiva… sweatdropped.

"You… are really violent, aren't you?"

"More like most of my techniques are abnormally destructive," Naruto corrected. "Anyway, thanks for the assist."

"What a gentlemanly response. You are most welcome, my gallant summoner. Hmm. I don't see the ancient with you." Shiva's smile truly was that of a queen's, however, Naruto thought he saw a chilling gleam of intrigue in her eyes. "I believe I shall stay on this plane for a while and spend some quality time with my summoner."

"Eh? If that's what you want. Just try not to get too touchy-feely. I am dating Aerith, after all."

Shiva's chuckle was somehow both warm and cold, like an icy chill in the middle of summer. "Worry not. I shall keep my hands to myself."

"Thank you."

Since it was clear to Naruto that his enemy had escaped—he couldn't sense their presence anymore—he quickly made his way out of the cargo bay and into the hall.

The hallway was quiet, deathly still. Naruto paused for a moment, frowning. He didn't believe he was being paranoid in thinking this, but he'd been positive that sirens would have been blaring by now. After all, he'd been caught and had engaged in short but brutal combat, and his enemy had escaped. That man, Sasuke or whoever he was, should have alerted Rufus Shinra to his presence by now. Why wasn't he surrounded by Shina soldiers?

Something's not right.

Nothing seemed to be out of place. The walls weren't damage, the lights cast their bright glow throughout the hallway. From a purely physical standpoint, there was absolutely nothing wrong.

But Naruto could sense it.

"Death hangs thick in this air."

So could Shiva, apparently.

"Change of plans. Let's move cautiously and find my friends."

"As you wish, my summoner."

Together, Naruto and Shiva crept through the ship. Ice followed in their wake, and while Naruto felt the need to ask Shiva if she could return from whence she came, he knew that doing so might invoke her ire. Besides, there was no telling what kind of trouble they'd run into. He might need some backup.

As Naruto neared the deck, a noise reached his ears—a familiar noise, one that he would recognize anywhere.

"That sounds like gunfire," Naruto murmured. "Come on, Shiva. Let's see what's going on."

"Hmph. Very well. Ha… and here I was hoping for some quality alone time with you."

Naruto ignored the remark as he leapt up the stairs and heel kicked the door, which blasted off its hinges and slammed into something. He rushed onto the deck and found himself in the middle of a warzone. Screams pierced the air, bone-chilling squeals of people being killed in horrible ways. Blood was splattered along the ground, along with body parts, some of which still twitched as if not realizing they'd left the person they belonged to. Rushing against the few people who remained alive, attacking with savage brutality, were strange creatures that he'd never seen before.

They skittered along on four legs, but they were no beast of burden. Pulsating purple bodies throbbed like a beating heart. While no head existed, eyes of glowing red peered at the world from a prehensile-like neck with a bulbous end. They had no feet, but instead possessed sharp claws that pierced the metal hull like it was made of cheese. A long tail with a spiked flail swung recklessly into shinra troops and hapless crew members alike, sending them flying. One particularly unlucky individual was pierced by a tail and got stuck on it, his body jerking around as he bled out. Another one of those creatures leapt into the air, revealing a mouth full of jagged teeth on the bottom, seconds before it landed on a sailor and devoured his head.

"W-what the hell are these things?" Naruto whispered in shock.

"I know not what these creatures are, but we'd best eliminate them, wouldn't you say?"

"Yes," Naruto shook himself from his daze, "I suppose you are right."

"In that case, wouldst thou battle alongside me, young sage?"

Naruto gave Shiva a grim smile. "It would be my pleasure."

XoX

They attacked Aerith while she was taking a shower. It was bad enough that she'd been forced to fight against creatures that looked like walking horror movie monsters—doing so while completely naked was just humiliating.

"Fira!"

Fire shot from the tip of her staff, slamming into the nearest monster and incinerating it. The creature ran around as it burned, its dying squeals akin to a pig being gutted while still alive. She then twirled around, the staff spinning, fire blazing, and sent six more fireballs at the next group of beasts—three of them, which were burnt to a charred crisp.

Sighing, Aerith set her staff against the bathroom wall, then grabbed her towel and quickly dried herself off. If she was under attack, then it meant her friends were under attack, which meant she needed to hurry up and get dressed.

"Aerith!"

Just as Aerith finished drying her hair, Tifa burst into the room, blood splattered against her clothes, though Aerith could tell it was not hers. Humans didn't have green blood, after all.

"We've got trouble! We're under—"

Tifa paused. She looked Aerith, then at the charred corpses near a hole that had been torn into the wall, then back at Aerith.

"I guess you already know what's going on?"

"You mean that we're being attacked by ugly monsters?" Aerith sounded just a touch sarcastic. "Yes, I did notice that. It's hard not to when they attack me while I'm in the shower."

"Right." Tifa looked away. "Well, anyway, you should hurry up and get dressed. We've gotta find the others."

"I know."

Aerith quickly got dressed and together, she and Tifa ran down the corridor. They heard screams coming from down the hall, and as they got closer, the door leading to the mess hall burst open and a headless corpse flew out. Several monsters followed, skittering along the ground like four-legged spiders.

"Fira!"

Fire burst from Aerith's staff and bowled over one of the monsters. It shrieked as it was lit on fire, then ran into one of the other monsters, causing it to catch fire, too. As both monsters ran around, slamming into walls and squealing, Aerith used the ice materia that was also embedded into her staff and froze the two creatures solid. The monsters shattered when she struck their bodies with her staff.

Meanwhile, Tifa had bulldozed over the last one. She smashed into it like a wrecking ball as it plowed into a brick wall. Her fist caught it completely unaware, hammering it with relentless fury. Blood splattered along the walls and room and Tifa as she literally bashed the monster to death. Only after the creature became an unrecognizable pulp of twitching limbs and spasming muscles did she relent.

"There," Tifa sighed, wiping the sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand. "Let's keep going."

"Right," Aerith nodded, and together, they took off again, reaching the staircase without trouble and ascending to the deck, where the sounds of fighting was loudest.

When they reached the deck, it was to see Barrett, Cloud, Naruto, Red XIII and Shiva fighting against a horde of those monsters. Bullets flew everywhere, pumping monsters full of holes and painting the deck floor green. Cloud's massive buster blade slashed apart everything that came near him. Meanwhile, Naruto and Shiva stood back to back, one firing off lightning jutsu like it was going out of style, while the other froze everything in front of her. The frozen enemies were then shattered by Red XIII barrelling into them like a feline cannon ball.

"Come on," Aerith said, gripping her staff. "Let's go help them!"

"Yeah!"

The two rushed into the chaotic throng.

XoX

"Raiton: Rasen Bolt (Lightning Release: Helix Bolt)!"

Naruto extended both arms outward, lightning gathering in his palms. The monsters screeched as they came closer to attack, but he unleashed all of the stored lightning in his hands in the form of two thunderous lightning bolts, which twisted together and formed a helix. The bolt struck the nearest monster, frying its insides. It then bounced from the first monster to the second, then to a third, a fourth, a fifth. Soon, nearly two dozen monsters were lit up like a fireworks festival. All of the monsters that he struck dropped to the ground when his attack ended, their bodies twitching sporadically, their internals charred beyond recovery.

"Journey beyond the nether and despair, Diamond Dust."

Ice jutting up from the floor. Those creatures who'd not been killed by Naruto's lightning technique were slaughtered when upon touching Shiva's attack. Some froze solid as they were engulfed; others were impaled, their bodies squirming as stakes shot through their bottoms and protruded out their backs. Those monsters were then frozen solid as well, ice creeping along their bodies until they were encased. Shiva then snapped her fingers, shattering the ice and causing the monsters to crumble.

"It seems there are no more enemies."

"Seems that way."

Naruto would have loved to celebrate this small moment of victory, but just then, several dozen more monsters climbed onto the ship from the sides.

"The fuck are all these monsters comin' from?!" Barrett growled.

"They're an endless horde. They just keep coming," Cloud agree.

The two stood back to back, Barrett firing at the endless horde, which crawled up the vessel's hull and onto the deck. Lightning arced along the Buster Sword as Cloud swung it in a sweeping motion, sending a wave of electricity into the incoming monsters on his side.

"Thundara!"

Yellow arcs of skittering lights crashed into the monsters like a wave. Shrieks erupted as each creature hit lit up like a bulb. Rushing forward, Cloud capitalized on their motionless state and sliced them apart. Behind him, Barrett bellowed a war cry as he unloaded led into his enemies, moving his arm around in a sweeping gesture.

"Naruto!"

"Cloud!"

As he finished off another monster by impaling it with several kunai, Naruto turned to see Aerith and Tifa running up to them.

Deciding to clear them a path, Naruto summoned his o-katana, Yamato, and dashed into the throng of creatures with near-reckless abandon. His sword flashed out like slivers of moonlight. Crab-like limbs flew through the air as they were severed. Squeals erupted as blood flew splashed against the floor like someone throwing buckets of green paint.

Shiva followed behind him. She strolled through the path he created, her graceful form moving as if she had all the time in the world. Shapely hips swung in an exaggerated fashion. Where her feet fell, ice and hoarfrost spread along the ground, creeping across the surface and then spreading to the remaining monsters, which soon turned into icy blue masses.

"Are you two alright?" asked Naruto as he stopped in front of Aerith.

"I'm fine," Aerith smiled as he checked her for injuries. Not seeing any, he breathed a sigh of relief, though he did wonder why her hair was so damp.

Tifa huffed. "I'm fine, too, in case you were wondering."

"Sorry," Naruto rubbed his head sheepishly. "I didn't mean to ignore you."

"Whatever," Tifa huffed as Cloud and Barrett came up to them.

"What's going on?" asked Aerith. "What are these creatures?"

Naruto shook his head. "I don't know for sure, but if I had to guess, I would say that Jenova is onboard this ship."

"Jenova?!" Barrett squawked. "You mean that freaky thing at Shinra is on this ship?!"

"Jenova?" Shiva looked at her summoner. "What is this, Jenova?"

"It's called the Calamity that fell from the sky. It's supposedly a powerful alien, or something of that nature." Naruto turned to Barrett. "And yes, I believe that Jenova is here. These monsters kinda remind me of Jenova. I think they might have been created from Jenova's cells somehow, or maybe they were created using some other method that involves Jenova."

"But why?" asked Tifa. "What purpose could there be for having something like that here?"

"To set a trap," Naruto and Cloud said at the same time.

"A trap?"

"Yes," Cloud nodded. "This is clearly a trap for Sephiroth. I bet you anything Shinra stored Jenova on this ship so Sephiroth would come. President Rufus being present might also be part of the bait."

"But that's insane!" Barrett's flabbergasted face was complete bulging eyes and gaping mouth. "Ain't Sephiroth some sort of badass or somethin'? Do they wanna die?!"

"While I would normally agree with you, it seems they have a secret weapon—someone in their forces has the Sharingan, an ocular based special ability from my world."

"From your world?"

Everyone else looked dumbfounded.

"That's right." Naruto nodded but said nothing more on that subject. "Now then, we have to find out where Jenova is being kept. If Sephiroth really is on this ship, then he's probably wherever Jenova is. Fortunately, I already sent Yuffie on a scouting mission, so she should be arriving—ah, here she is."

Barrett shouted when Yuffie suddenly appeared before them, just like a ninja. Naruto nodded at her. "What do you have for me?"

"I've found Jenova, sensei," Yuffie said, grinning. "Sephiroth is there, too. He's fighting against some cloaked guy."

"I see." That confirmed his theory that he was not the possible-Uchiha's target. "Let's go everyone!"

He received a series of affirmatives, and the group rushed off to discover the location of Jenova, Sephiroth, and the cloaked individual.

XoX

Sasuke clicked his tongue as his cloak was slashed apart by a long nodachi. He didn't know what was worse; that he'd almost been killed, or that the person who'd almost killed him looked like a girl.

The figure before him definitely had a feminine appearance. Long silver hair framed an effeminate face with glowing, cat-like eyes. A leather coat hung off a thin yet muscular frame, and silver pauldrons sat on his shoulders.

Sasuke used the remains of his fluttering cloak to disguise his movements, leaping at his foe from the shadows—too bad his opponent had been expecting that. Sasuke barely avoided certain death by unsheathing his chokuto and raising it to block a massively powerful swing. His hair was buffeted in the wind that kicked up as a result, and he gritted his teeth, straining against his enemy, whose physical strength was phenomenal.

Leaping backwards as he realized his disadvantage, Sasuke ducked under Sephiroth's follow up swing, then lunged at his enemy, hoping to impale the nodachi user on his blade. When that didn't work, and his blade was knocked aside, Sasuke jumped back again, throwing several kunai to keep Sephiroth from following.

"You're quite fast," Sephiroth said, grinning, his cat-like eyes glowing an ethereal green. "Let's see if you can move even faster."

Sasuke gnashed his teeth together as Sephiroth's nodachi nearly sliced him in twain. Thanks to his Sharingan, he avoided the attack, but Sephiroth moved so quickly that if it weren't for his eyes, there would have been no chance of him dodging.

"Katon: Gokakyu no Jutsu!"

A fireball spewed from his mouth, twice as large as Sephiroth was tall. It blocked Sasuke's view of the other man—at least until Sephiroth sliced the fireball in half. However, that had only been a distraction.

"What sort of power is this?"

Sephiroth looked down as he was bound by half a dozen strings—adamantine wires that Sasuke pulled taught. Sasuke then brought his hands to his mouth and gathered chakra to unleash his next attack.

"Katon: Ryuuka no Jutsu!"

Fire roared as it traveled down the wires, rushing toward Sephiroth and exploding on contact. The blast sent a wave of searing heat across the large warehouse, melting the metal that was close to the explosion. Sasuke didn't look away from the destructive attack. He stared into the fire, watching, waiting.

A whirlwind of blades cut through the flames, dispersing it to reveal an unharmed Sephiroth standing in the center.

"You'll have to do better than that," Sephiroth smirked at him. Sasuke scowled.

"Then why don't you try this on for size?!"

The voice came from above. It was the blond that Sasuke had mistaken for Sephiroth. He was descending toward the silver-haired swordsman like a cannonball, an o-katana in his hand.

Sephiroth blocked the strike meant to cleave him in half, then glanced up.

"You look familiar. Have we met before?"

"No, we've never met."

"Hmm." Sephiroth tilted his head. "Do you have a twin?"

Naruto twitched. "I'm gonna ignore your last comment. Now eat my Rasengan!"

A swirling blue ball of energy appeared in Naruto's hand, which he thrust into Sephiroth's chest. Because the man didn't have a free hand to protect himself with, the attack slammed into him, and he was sent flying into several large crates that squealed as the metal was rent apart like a tin can.

Sasuke eyed the space where Sephiroth was embedded in, then turned his attention to the blond.

"I had a feeling it was you… Sasuke."

He tilted his head. Sasuke could sense the hostility in this blond man's gaze. The hatred emanating from his eyes was somehow familiar, though he could not fathom why.

"I don't know how you know my name, but know this, if you get in my way, I will kill you."

Naruto clicked his tongue. "It seems you've lost your memory. Well, whatever. I don't really give a damn about that. I've got bigger fish to fry than you right now, so consider yourself lucky."

Sasuke frowned. He was tempted ask this strange blond what he was talking about, but Sephiroth chose that moment to fly out of the crates and attack them both. He and the blond leapt away from each other, separating and moving in sync to trap Sephiroth in a pincer maneuver.

In the future, he and this strange blond might become enemies, but for now, they were allies of circumstance.

XoX

Aerith had wanted to go with Naruto, not travel with the others as they searched for that monstrosity known as Jenova. She knew why Naruto had sent her away—the moment he'd seen the cloaked individual without his cloak, his entire countenance had changed. Sasuke. That was the name that had issued from his lips, a name that he spoke so hatefully it was a wonder no one had died from its utterance.

Sasuke. She knew who he was. Naruto had told her everything there was to know about his life back in the Elemental Nations. Sasuke, the betrayer, the murderer, the one who Naruto had thought of as a brother, but who had stabbed him in the back. Naruto's hatred of Sasuke as well-known to her. Even though he tried to hide it, she could see the rage buried underneath layers of self-discipline.

"That man… the one fighting the swordsman. He is another one of those otherworlders, is he not?" Shiva asked, breaking her silent musings.

Aerith glanced at the summon, wondering why this woman was still here. She'd never heard of a summons sticking around longer than they were needed.

"He is," Aerith answered. "That was Sasuke, a former teammate of Naruto's."

The words surprised the other members of her party. Shiva merely looked intrigued.

"Indeed? I suppose that is why he feels different from everyone else. Although, he still has nothing on the young sage." Shiva shivered. "That boy, his affinity for nature sends tingles down my spine. The Lifestream loves him. The other goddesses are going to be so jealous."

"Goddesses?"

"Of course. What else would you call a being as divine as myself if not a goddess?"

Pretentious much?

Still, Aerith did wonder about that. Summons were, while not common, known enough that most people who used materia had heard of them. They were powerful entities that could be summoned using the materia. However, very little was known about them aside from that. Could it be that they truly were gods and goddesses? Aerith didn't know. It was one of life's mysteries, she supposed.

"So, what are we lookin' fer?" asked Barrett.

"Jenova," Cloud answered, "Or at least, a piece of Jenova."

"How the hell are we supposed to know what that looks like?"

"Just look for anything that doesn't belong in a ship."

"Like a giant monster with tentacles hanging from the ceiling?" asked Red XIII.

Cloud nodded. "Yes, like a giant monster with tentacles hanging from the… oh…"

Aerith looked up with the others and saw what had caused Cloud to stop talking. Hanging above them like some grotesque pseudopodia was a creature beyond anything Aerith could have conjured in even her worst nightmares.

A pod, that's what it looked like. A giant pod suspended from the ceiling by a series of tentacles that were impaled into the walls. Veins thicker than jungle vines pulsated, pumping fluids—for Aerith couldn't call it blood—through its body and along its tentacles. Dark purple skin sloughed off its body like ooze. It splattered against the floor, revealing that it wasn't skin at all, but actually those creatures that had been attacking them.

"That… is so disgusting," Tifa covered her mouth with a hand. Aerith felt much the same way.

"It is indeed an ugly looking creature." Shiva frowned. "I suppose we had best kill it."

"You mean you're going to help us?" asked Cloud.

"But of course. I shan't leave until I have spent adequate time with my summoner, and I cannot do that until this thing is disposed of."

Aerith twitched at the mention of Shiva wanting to spend time with Naruto. She didn't say anything, though, because she knew that Naruto wouldn't cheat on her. Shiva probably knew that, too, and was just trying to rile her up.

"Well, then," Aerith spun her staff around. "If we want to kill this thing, we had best get started. It's offspring are coming for us."

Indeed, the little four-legged spiders that it had created were coming for them. They skittered along the ground like a myriad of spiders.

Cloud slung his sword off his shoulder. Tifa tightened her gloves. Barrett's gun arm whirred to life. Red XIII's tail stood on end.

Shiva looked at Aerith.

"Are you ready for this, young ancient?"

Aerith wondered if Shiva was being condescending to her. It didn't matter in the end. Naruto was counting on them to complete this job, so she'd put up with this pretentious goddesses attitude and fight alongside her.

"Yes."

"Good. Then let me see what you are capable of."

Shiva snapped her fingers.

And several dozen stakes of ice jutted from the ground.

XoX

Naruto wished his current circumstances were different. If the situation were not so dire, if he wasn't fighting against a man hailed as the strongest SOLDIER, then he could have killed Sasuke by now. Unfortunately, he was, so ripping Sasuke's spinal cord out with his bare hands would have to wait.

I fucking hate my life.

"Katon: Gokyaku no Jutsu!"

"Fuuton: Repuusho!"

A fireball spewed out of Sasuke's mouth while jet streams of wind shot from Naruto's hands. The two attacks combined, forming an impressive conical-shaped stream of burning blue flames, which slammed into Sephiroth, exploding on contact.

Blazing hot winds rushed outwards from the explosion, whipping Naruto's and Sasuke's hair into a frenzy. Naruto narrowed his eyes when a blade sliced through their combination jutsu, dispersing the attack, revealing that Sephiroth was unharmed. There wasn't even a scratch on him. Not even a single burn mark.

What an annoying enemy.

"Is that all you two have to offer?"

Naruto clicked his tongue and unsheathed his o-katana. He didn't like this fool's arrogance. However, Naruto couldn't afford to use his more powerful attacks, not unless he wanted to sink this whole ship along with Sephiroth.

I'm in a bind alright. Damn.

His overhand strike was blocked by a nodachi, which Sephiroth wielded with a single hand like it weighed a feather. The longer blade was angled, and his o-katana slid off in a clash of sparks. This didn't deter him, however, and Naruto spun around in a powerful horizontal slash. While it was also blocked, Naruto used the potential energy gained from the strike to spin around and launch a powerful kick at Sephiroth's chest.

Bang! Like a cannon firing, Sephiroth was sent flying across the room. Stabbing the nodachi into the ground, Sephiroth skidded across the metal surface, slowly coming to a halt. Upon stopping fully, Sephiroth looked up and smirked.

"I hope that's not all you—"

"Genjutsu: Shiranui (Unknown Fire)!"

Because he was not caught within the genjutsu, Naruto couldn't see what Sephiroth saw. But he knew the genjutsu being used, and so he knew what it did. Even as he stood there, he saw Sephiroth look around himself, no doubt seeing the blue fire surrounding him. Sephiroth soon began frantically patting himself, hoping to put out the illusory fire. That was when Sasuke appeared before him and slammed a powerful double palm thrust into the silver-haired swordsman's back.

As Sephiroth skidded forward, Naruto appeared before him.

"Rasengan!"

Sephiroth lashed out with his sword, slicing through Rasengan and Naruto alike—or so he thought. When Naruto disappeared in a burst of smoke, Sephiroth only had a second to contemplate what that meant before Naruto landed on his head feet first. The former SOLDIER crashed face first into the ground, blood spurting from a now broken nose. Naruto then leapt off Sephiroth and threw several kunai at the older man.

"Kunai Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

Five kunai became fifty. Sephiroth rolled out of the way, leaving the kunai to impale the ground as he leapt to his feet.

He slashed his sword out, a large arc of energy shooting from his blade. It barreled toward Naruto, who cut it in half with his o-katana.

Sasuke leapt from the air and descended quickly, his body spinning and leg stretched out for a heel drop. A swipe from Sephiroth's nodachi cut Sasuke in half, but there was no blood, just a flock of crows that burst from his seems. Sasuke disappeared within the crows, vanishing into thin air.

"Chidori Eiso (One-Thousand Birds Sharp Spear)!"

Loud chirping emitted from Sasuke's hand as he appeared behind Sephiroth. Lightning crackled to life in a flare of blue energy. Sasuke thrust out his hand, and a blue spear of lightning extended from it at incredible speed. Sephiroth tried to dodge, but several Naruto clones chose that moment to appear around him, latching onto his arms, legs and torso like a human vice. Sephiroth struggled to break free, but the Narutos' hold was ironclad.

The spear stabbed through flesh, and blood soon pooled along the metal floor.

XoX

They were trapped between a rock and a hard place. Aerith was sure that, if all they had to deal with was that disgusting thing hanging over them, the problem would have already been solved. However, this monster seemed to have an unlimited number of offspring at its disposal. Everytime they defeated one monster, six more would take its place. They were being overwhelmed by sheer numbers, and Aerith didn't know how much longer they would last.

Cloud and Tifa stood on either side of Barrett, protecting the large man from the horde of monsters as he peppered their creator with his gunarm. It was just unfortunate that the bullets didn't seem to affect the mother monster. They bounced off its strangely gelatinous and sticky carapace like rubber bullets.

"Those who remain in darkness shall return to darkness. Diamond Dust."

Ice jutted from the ground. Crystal pillars spread across the floor, and all of the monsters caught within its path became frozen solid, mere icicles awaiting their final demise. Shiva surveyed the large mass of frost-bitten monstrous creatures with an apathetic gaze. Then she snapped her fingers. The ice shattered, and the monsters shattered along with it, like fragile glass figurines that had been dropped onto the floor.

Aerith darted across the ice, skidding along the surface. She almost lost her balance, but retained it by using her staff to help her stand as she slid. When she reached the bloated creature hanging from the ceiling, she called upon the materia in her staff—

"Firaga!"

—and sent a massive ball of white-hot flames into the creature's bottom half.

Loud shrieks issued from the throatless mass. The monstrosity wiggled and squirmed as flames sought to consume it. Miniature explosions rocked it as the fat dripping from its decaying form ignited, setting its body ablaze.

"Quickly, Barrett! Aim for the burn marks!" Aerith shouted.

"Eh? Uh, right!" Barrett raised his gun arm, which whirred to life. "Take this, mother fucker!"

Barrett unloaded his entire payload into the thing's underbelly. Unlike last time, where the bullets had simply bounced off, this time they penetrated the creature's skin, which had been weakened by Aerith's fire, the fat that protected it burned off. Gouts of blood exploded from its body like small geysers. Mucus-y skin fell off in vast quantities, splattering with wet thuds against the ground. By the time Barret was done, the monster was missing several parts of its body. It looked like someone had taken a hacksaw to it.

"Red XIII!"

Howling like a ferocious beast, Red XIII's body glowed a brilliant white. He bolted across the floor, leapt into the air, and then began to spin. Faster and Faster he spun, until he looked like a power drill. He struck the monster, his body drilling straight through and coming out the other side. More shrieks were emitted. More blood and organs rained upon the ground.

"Cloud! Tifa! Finish it!"

Tifa responded to the words by dashing forward and leaping into the air. She quickly reached the squirming monster and unleashed a powerful series of punches and kicks. Each time her fist or foot pounded the creature, dents appeared on its body in the shape of her appendage. By the time she was done, the monster looked like it had been pounded with a mallet by a master butcher.

While Tifa was pounding away at the monster, Cloud gathered energy into his sword. Blue light flared to life along it, engulfing it. When Tifa fell back to the ground, he swung his sword, unleashing a furious shout as a large crescent beam of destruction flew into the monster, slicing through with ease.

The creature stopped squirming. Its body split apart, the two halves peeling away from the other, spilling innards and blood all over the floor. They crashed against the metal with a wet splatter, twitching several times before going mercifully still.

"That was an awfully putrid creature," Shiva declared. Sighing, she looked down at herself to see that her body was beginning to dissolve. "And it looks like the mana holding me together has been used up. How disappointing. I'd been hoping to spend more time with my young summoner."

Shiva disappeared entirely, a few particles of blue frost remaining before even that vanished.

Silence descended upon the group, who were unsure of what to say in the wake of their battle.

It would be Barrett who eventually broke the silence.

"I ain't never wanna fight somethin' like that again."

The others nodded, unable to say anything else, but wholeheartedly agreeing with him.

XoX

Naruto didn't know what had happened. He'd seen Sasuke's Chidori stab Sephiroth through the chest, watched from a distance as lightning shaped like a spear pierced the silver-haired warrior's heart. No one, not even the so-called "greatest SOLDIER of all time" could survive something like that. That final attack should have been the end of it.

It wasn't.

Sephiroth attacked Sasuke with renewed vigor, the large hole in his chest visible even from a distance. His nodachi carved holes into the floor and tore apart the metal containers on either side of them with ease. Kunai were useless. Sasuke had already tried blocking the nodachi with a kunai, and that had only resulted in his kunai being sliced in half. Naruto thought he was lucky to still have a hand.

"Chidori: Senbon!"

Sasuke swept his hand through the air as if swiping at a bug. Dozens of blue needles made of electricity lanced out in a wide arc.

Undaunted by the sight, Sephiroth swung his blade, unleashing a furious wave of energy that slammed into the senbon and forcefully dispersed them.

The floor underneath the combined attacks buckled. Small fissures appeared along the metal surface. Fractures from the metal breaking under the strain. Likewise, the crates that stood on either side of the attacks had holes torn into them, as if a god had come down and punched them.

It's a wonder this place hasn't been destroyed yet.

So far, he and Sasuke had avoided using their more powerful techniques. Had they done so, this battle would have already been over. Yet if they used anything more powerful, than this ship would sink to the bottom of the ocean. Both of them understood that and wanted to avoid having it happen. Unfortunately, that left them at a very distinct disadvantage.

Sephiroth closed the distance between him and Sasuke. He tried bifurcating the Sharingan user, but Sasuke unsheathed his chokuto and met the attack head on, using chakra flow to create a sharp cutting edge. Despite doing this, however, Sephiroth's nodachi did not receive a single cut. It remained pristine.

Can Sephiroth also use chakra flow, or is his sword just that strong?

Deciding that he couldn't stand by and watch, Naruto leapt into the fray. His o-katana slid from its sheath with the sound of hissing steel.

Sephiroth must have heard the sound, because he spun around and blocked his attack, sparks emitting from where their weapons grinded against each other.

"I was wondering when you'd try your hand." Sephiroth grinned at him. "Saw your friend in trouble and wanted to help out? How admirable."

"That jerkwad isn't my friend," Naruto grunted and added more chakra to his muscles, exponentially enhancing them. "I couldn't care less if he died. I just happen to want you dead more than him—at least for now."

"Oh? I see. Perhaps I misjudged you. Not so admirable."

Sephiroth pushed and overpowered Naruto, who fell back and reversed the grip of his o-katana. The silver-haired swordsman had but a moment to realize what Naruto was up to, and then Naruto shoved the hilt of his o-katana into Sephiroth's chest. A loud bang! followed by several cracks issued from the point of impact. Sephiroth flew back, his feet skidding along the ground, before he smacked into a large crate that caved in around him.

"Chidori: Eiso!"

Sasuke thrust out his hand and sent a long spear of blue lighting at Sephiroth, who saw it coming and leapt into the air.

Naruto met Sephiroth in mid-air and assaulted the former SOLDIER from all sides with his o-katana. Yet no matter how quickly his slashes and stabs came in, the swordsman blocked all of them despite his disadvantageous position. As the two descended toward the ground, Naruto noticed Sasuke out of the corner of his eyes, and he felt the massive surge of chakra emanate from the Uchiha.

"Enton: Kagutsuchi (Blaze Release: Added Tool Earth Lord)!"

Black flames erupted from Sasuke's right eye. Held out his hand and the flames gathered there, coalescing into the shape of a sword, which he grasped and used to try and cleave Sephiroth into halves. He didn't seem to care that Naruto was also in his sword's path.

"What a powerful ability."

While Naruto replaced himself with a crate, Sephiroth turned around in mid-air. He met the sword of black flames head on. A sonic boom launched the two away from each other, and Sasuke's flame sword was snuffed out by the power of Sephiroth's swing. The older man landed lightly on the ground. Then he slid into a wide stance, his nodachi held near his face, the blade pointed at the ground.

He was grinning.

"However, let us see if your ability can match mine."

Having landed on the ground after using the replacement technique, Naruto was given an eyewitness account of Sephiroth's power. His nodachi sparked a bright blue. Ethereal flames engulfed the sword as arcane energies skittered across it surface. Swinging it in a wide, sweeping arc, Sephiroth sent a wave of energy at Sasuke who, unable to replace his materia in time, was left with no option but to try and defend himself with his sword.

It didn't work out too well.

Already hanging in the air, Sasuke had no traction and was thus sent flying as the crescent smashed into him like a raging hurricane. He slammed into the ceiling, which dented from the force with which he struck it. Yet still the crescent wave of energy continued to try and slice him apart. Sasuke gritted his teeth and channeled even more chakra into his blade, which glowed brightly as it fought against the foreign power. Yelling loudly, as if doing so would somehow help, Sasuke fought the attack which, after nearly a full fifteen seconds, finally dissipated when it ran out of energy.

"You are quite strong," Sephiroth said as Sasuke descended to the floor. "But you're not as strong as me."

"He might not be, but I think you'll find yourself surprised by me."

Sephiroth spun around as Naruto attacked him from behind. Their swords met in a loud clash of ringing steel. Yet they didn't remain that way for long. Rather than fight a battle of supremacy, Naruto spun around and attacked from the other side. When that attack was also blacked, he spun again, and again, and again, his attacks and rotary force picking up speed all the while, until eventually, he spun so fast that his body looked like a tornado.

"Fuuton: Kentenpe (Wind Rlease: Sword Tempest)!"

Adding wind chakra to the technique via his materia, Naruto created thousands of impossibly sharp cutting blades that were capable of slicing through just about anything. Sephiroth tried blocking the attack with his blade, but not even a blade like the Masamune could withstand a million cuts from wind chakra. Cracks formed, spreading from the many places where Naruto's wind blades hit before, like the shattering of glass, the nodachi broke apart, its fragments sprinkling the floor.

Sephiroth leapt back, avoiding the fate of his sword, though not before Naruto sliced through the bridge of his nose.

Reaching up with a hand, Sephiroth wiped at the liquid running down his face. When he brought it back, he stared at the dark blood covering his leather glove.

He started clapping.

"Very good. You not only broke my sword, but you also cut me. That doesn't happen very often. I applaud your strength. While I would love to bring you to the brink of despair for hurting, I'm afraid that my time here is at an end. I have what I want."

Naruto frowned, then his eyes widened when Sephiroth ascended into the air and blew apart the roof, flying higher and higher until he disappeared from sight.

In the stillness that now reigned, Naruto could only frown.

"I totally had that jerk by the balls," he decided.

After casting one last look around the room, and noticing that Sasuke was no longer present, Naruto sighed and went in search of his friends.

XoX

Sasuke stood in front of Rufus Shinra, the man whom he had served for as long as he could remember. They were in a helicopter, which soared over the vast sea, traveling on its way to Costa del Sol. Heidegger traveled with them. He was sitting several seats away due to his girth. President Rufus sat with his arms crossed and one leg resting over the other, an aggrieved expression plastered on his face.

"So, you were unable to kill or capture Sephiroth?"

"That is correct, President Rufus," Sasuke offered no excuse.

"That is disappointing," President Rufus muttered. "Still, the fact that you came back with only minor injuries speaks highly of your skill. Good work."

"Gya ha ha! My latest war machine could have—"

"Done nothing against Sephiroth," President Rufus said coldly. "Your machines might stand up well enough against the rank and file, but they could never compete with someone like Sephiroth."

Heidegger looked like he wanted to murder the Shinra president. However, everyone knew that he wouldn't dare touch the man who paid his bills. After growling, the fat war-like man turned his attention to the window, brooding.

Sasuke said nothing. After nodding his head in recognition of President Rufus' compliment, he turned his attention to other matters.

That blond man…

That strange blond who knew his name. Who was he? That man had claimed to know him, but that shouldn't have been possible. The only people who knew him was President Rufus, Professor Hojo, and now Heidegger—and that fatass had only been let in on his existence a few weeks ago. There was simply no way that man could know him, and yet…

He knew my name.

Sasuke stared out of the helicopter, toward the vessel which even now remained inert. It would likely be stranded in the middle of the ocean for some time, until a repair crew could come and pull it to shore. It would probably take a while, though, maybe even months before a tug boat came along.

I wonder why I didn't say anything about that blond…

He hadn't told President Rufus about the blond or his companions. That confused him. Sasuke had been loyal to the Shinra Corporation for his entire life. He'd completed every mission given to him, and his loyalty to the president was unwavering. And yet…

I don't understand.

His frown deepened. Images flashed through his mind, but they were gone before he could grasp them, like an illusion that came and went at will.

Why did he seem so familiar…

Sasuke closed his eyes and leaned against the back of the pilot's chair.

Who was that man?


I know it's been a while since I've updated this. For that, you have my apologies. It's hard writing for so many stories at once, and so some stories end up getting slower updates based on how motivated I am to write them. However, this story isn't dead, and I will update when I can.

Also, some of you may already know this, but I published to the second book to my original series awhile ago. A Fox's Tail can be found on Amazon for kindle and paperback. If you decide to support me by getting this book and leaving a review for it, I would be very grateful.

Kevin's life has finally started settling down. Sure, he still has to deal with Lilian's zany antics, but desensitization has set in at last and he's actually beginning to enjoy the gorgeous Kitsune's continued presence. Too bad he's in denial. Unfortunately, while the waters of his life appear relatively calm, things are about to get ecchi-I mean ugly.

A tsundere dressed in Gothic Lolita fashion…

A boy whose hair is bigger than his brain…

A new enemy that makes Chris Fleischer look like a fifty pound weakling...

Trying to admit his feelings for a certain tomboy...

Not to mention Lilian herself. Yeah, Kevin's got problems, and life can only get more strenuous from here on out. Oh well. At least he hasn't been turned into a Harem Protagonist.