PASSAGE OF HESITANCE
NEWTs

It was finally May, which meant that the NEWTs were fast approaching. Everybody was in study mode. Even Sirius and James.

The seventh year Slytherins had given up their relentless bullying of the younger students, which came as a shock to everybody. The seventh year Ravenclaws spent almost all of their time in the library, so they were hardly ever seen by anybody. Remus tended to join them most of the time. The seventh year Hufflepuffs spent a lot of time out in the sun studying from their books. The seventh year Gryffindors were just scattered around the school studying wherever and whenever they could.

It wasn't uncommon these days to hear of a student having a mental breakdown because of the stress from the exams. People who had been focusing too much were losing concentration and performing spells wrong in class, resulting in many people having to be sent to the hospital wing from spell damage and exhaustion.

The teachers told them not to worry, that this was all normal for seventh years, but the students still couldn't help worrying.

Sirius was happy, though. After the whole 'Death Eater Fiasco' – well that's what the students called it – Remus had been talking to him again. It was such a relief to have his friend back. Although, when Remus was in study mode, he wasn't the most pleasant friend to be around.

"One more time, Sirius," Remus said frantically, throwing a thick book at Sirius.

"We've been over this five times today!" Sirius said, feeling tired.

"Please," Remus said.

"Fine. Erm, okay how about the Draught of Living Death? Instruct me on how to brew it correctly."

The look on Remus's face changed as he thought about his answer carefully. "Cut up the Sopophorous bean, pour in 250 fl. Oz. of water and add 5 oz. of African sea salt. Um, set the beaker aside after all of the water's been added and... what was it, again? Oh, make sure that you do not shake or move the beaker! Leave it to rest for five minutes. Pour the water into the cauldron. Oh, Merlin. What was next? Um... okay, give me a second to think about this-"

"-Remus, calm down," Sirius said, closing the Potions book. "You do know it. Better than anybody, probably. You've recited it five times today already. You probably need to just take a break."

"I can't calm down! The exams are next week, Sirius! Aren't you at all worried about them?"

"Of course I am, but you're stressing out too much about them," Sirius said.

"It's better to be stressed out but prepared than laid back and unprepared!" Remus snapped back, snatching the Potions book up and flicking to the page they were on.

Sirius sighed. "I'm going downstairs for a bit," he said.

"I'll be up here if you need me," Remus muttered, scanning the page he was on.

Sirius headed downstairs into the common room, which was filled with older students who were studying like crazy, and younger students who were getting snapped at and shouted at for speaking too loudly and interrupting the older student's studies. Sirius could see James and Peter sitting in the corner of the common room, both leaning over a book.

Sirius headed towards them and took the empty seat next to James. "Hey guys."

"Shh," Peter said. Both James and Peter seemed to be concentrating very hard on what they were reading. Sirius sighed. Couldn't they take a break from studying for at least an hour?

"Dream Potion," James muttered. "Can only be brewed between sunset and sunrise, but not when the moon is too bright in the sky."

"I thought it was when the moon was the brightest?" Peter said, looking worried. "Oh Merlin, I'm going to fail!"

"You won't fail," Sirius said. "Now you know. It's when the moon isn't too bright."

"What is the only spell known to fend off a Lethifold? I looked over this earlier and I've completely forgotten," James said.

"I'm pretty sure it was 'Expecto Patronum'," Sirius said.

"Crap, I thought it was 'stupify'!" Peter shrieked. "Crap, crap, crap!"

"Don't worry Wormtail," James said. "We all have certain things we're not sure about. I bet at least eighty percent of the paper will be easy."

Peter didn't look convinced. "I'm going to fail and then I'm going to wind up working as a janitor at the Hog's Head or something revolting like that."

"No, you won't," Sirius said. "Because we won't let that happen, mate. We're all going to pass."

"But how?"

"Well first, I think you need to take a break from studying. I think I can literally hear your brain frazzling in there," Sirius said.

"He's right, you know," James said. "My brain feels like it's going to shrivel up inside my head."

"No more studying for tonight," Sirius said. "I have some Firewhiskey, and then we'll start studying again first thing in the morning. Sound good?"

"Where's the damned Firewhiskey?!" James said, throwing his book back into his bag.

##

Monday morning was the day of their first exam; Charms. All four of them were sitting at breakfast, trying not to think about the impending exam.

"I suggest you four hurry up because the exam starts in ten minutes," Professor McGonagall said as she walked past their table.

Sirius sighed and stood up. "I suppose we should go."

Their NEWT exams were to be held in empty classrooms around the school. Unlike the OWLs, there were less people to each class, so the exams were taking place in smaller rooms. This time, their Charms exam was to be taking place in their second year Transfiguration class.

"Last time I was in this classroom was that time Wormtail transfigured his little toe into a mushroom," James said, smiling fondly at the memory. "Those were the days."

"My little toe is still funny-looking, thanks to that," Peter said.

"I don't care about Wormtail's little toe," Remus said irritably. "It's our NEWTs today. Let me focus."

They all knew better than to argue with Remus just before an exam. There was never a time where he was more irritable.

"Good morning, everyone," came a shrill voice. "I'm one of your five examiners. I shall be calling you in five at a time to complete your practical exams. After that, you shall have an hour's lunch and then you will be sitting your theory in this room. First up are: Michael Applebee, Kelly Baker, Tina Baker, Sirius Black and Amelia Bones."

Sirius gulped and followed the other four people whose names had been called. "Good luck," Remus whispered as he walked past.

When he stepped into the classroom, he was beckoned over to sit in front of a young wizard. The desk that he was sitting at had a teacup on it, with a jug.

"Good morning, Mr Black," the examiner said. "Today, what I'd like you to do is to create water in this jug here-" he gestured towards the jug "- and then levitate the jug so as to pour the water into this teacup here-" he then gestured towards the teacup "- and then I would like you to give the teacup legs, change the colour of the teacup, and then finally clear the water from the teacup."

Sirius nodded, thinking carefully about what needed to be done. He was sure he could remember learning about each of those spells – whether it was in first year or seventh year, or somewhere in between.

"You may begin," the examiner said, picking up his quill and parchment.

Sirius cleared his throat and took his wand out. "Aguamenti," he said, pointing his wand at the jug. He watched in relief as the jug started filling up with clear water. After the jug was filled, he pointed his wand at it once more and said "Wingardium Leviosa," and carefully levitated the jug up in the air. He moved the jug closer to the teacup and he nearly dropped his wand when a drop of water accidentally spilt over the side of the jug. Taking a deep breath, he tilted his wand slightly and poured the water into the teacup.

He decided to sit for a moment before carrying on. Think, Sirius, think.

"Tarantallegra," he said clearly, pointing his wand at the teacup and watching it sprout four small legs. He allowed the teacup to walk around for a moment before saying "colovaria," which turned the teacup from white to green. He glanced up at the examiner, who was writing a lot down on his piece of parchment. Sirius hoped it was good comments he was writing. Finally, Sirius cast "scourgify" and the water, legs and colour disappeared from the teacup.

"Thank you very much, Mr Black. Good luck on your theory examination," the examiner said, shaking Sirius's hand.

As he left the classroom, he couldn't help smiling. It hadn't been as bad as he'd feared. Actually, it had been quite easy compared to the horrible ideas that had been going through his head. Sirius and the other four students who had just sat their practical exams were escorted out a different door so they could not tell any of the other students what had come up in the exam.

As soon as Sirius was free, he ran upstairs to an empty corridor and pulled a mirror out of his bag.

"Prongs!" he hissed. It took a moment as he watched the mirror, and then he saw his best friend's face appear, and a grin appear on his face.

"Padfoot! How was it? What came up?" James asked. Sirius watched as Peter's head appeared beside James's.

"Aguamenti, Wingardium Leviosa, Tarantallegra, Colovaria and Scourgify," Sirius whispered into the mirror.

"You," James said. "Are the best! Thanks, mate!"

"No problem," Sirius said. "Really, it was easy. Don't worry about it, you'll be fine."

"Why are you talking to a mirror?" Sirius heard someone say from James's side. James looked slightly scared and then his face was gone.

##

The rest of the exams went in a similar fashion. Sirius found himself quite happy that none of the exams proved to be too difficult. Peter disagreed with this, of course, but Remus and James also found the exams to be quite simple.

They were sitting down by the lake, watching the rippling water. Sirius smiled and closed his eyes.

"It's great, isn't it?" he said. "Being finished completely with school."

"It's great, but it's also kind of sad," James said. "I mean, we've spent that last seven years of our lives here. I'm definitely going to miss it."

"So many memories," Sirius said, grinning. "Like that one time Remus was going to pull that prank on Slughorn and he got locked in Sluggie's office with no escape."

"Hey, that wasn't funny!" Remus said, narrowing his eyes at Sirius. "How about that time you fell into the Black Lake and started screaming like a little girl because you thought that the Giant Squid was going to eat you?"

"It was freaking scary," Sirius said. "You'd be scared too!"

"Remember that time we had a party in our dorm and Peter fell through the floor?" James said, laughing slightly. "The guys downstairs must have been proper freaked out."

"The first time we successfully turned into animagi," Sirius said. "That was great."

"How about when Sirius 'came out of the closet'?" James said. "That one was hilarious."

"Oh Merlin, yeah," Remus said. "You literally jumped out of the closet and screamed it at us."

"Well, what can I say? I'm cool like that," Sirius said with a grin.

"And the fact that it took Peter ten minutes to understand why Sirius had jumped out of the closet was even funnier," James said.

They all laughed and Sirius sighed, leaning back against the tree. "Yeah," he said. "Maybe I will miss this."

"We'll still see each other though, when we leave," Remus said. "I mean, we have the Order and whatnot."

They all smiled at each other. They knew this would be an emotional ride for all of them.

###