Chapter 28: Harvest
"I don't think this is a good idea?" I told him. Everyone was tired. The last of the crops were being harvested and most of the men on the estate had been working till long past fatigue set in for the past six weeks now and tempers were high. Jenny's youngest child was only three weeks old and had been restless since his first night. Michael didn't sleep for more than an hour at a time, screaming his lungs out day and night as he quickly wore down the patience of even a saint. Jenny was exhausted, as we all were. We had been taking it in turns to keep him company night and day so that others could rest. Elizabeth had started to cut her first tooth and was just as restless and grumpy as Michael which didn't help matters. Jamie and Ian tried to help as best they could, but even they needed to sleep every now and then, often collapsing in the chair each night before dinner had even been served. I made every effort to be more help around the house, to keep the younger children out of everybody's hair, but my own stamina had been waning lately as I struggled to keep up with the demands of my advanced pregnancy and to top it all off I had just remembered that it was Bree's birthday in four days.
As I handed Michael over to Mrs Crook, taking my leave of him after soothing him for the last several hours since breakfast, I left the other women to their work in the kitchen, snuck upstairs and took a long needed quiet seat by the fire, closing my eyes for a moment. 'Right Beauchamp, get a grip.' I told myself. Bree's a big girl, she'll understand, I thought. Besides, times were hard and it wasn't customary to celebrate ones birthday with a party here, as it was or had been, back home. Maybe it was time to let some old traditions, or newer traditions, rest. I slipped off my shoes, rested my feet on the small chest nearby and let the noise of the fire crackling away drift through my thoughts.
JAMMF
"Nay. It's a bonny Idea." Jamie denied my concerns about his most recent plan as he slipped out of his dusty clothes and collapsed into the chair beside me. He had come up to find me not long after I had snuck away from the others, looking just as tired as I felt. I knew he had Fergus and the others keeping an eye on me when he was in the fields, but he also found any excuse he could to check on me in person. I had long since stopped arguing that I was fine, and found joy in the fact that even after so long together he still cared for me the way that he did. Today's excuse, or so I had been led to believe, was Donas having come up lame after he picked up a stone. Although I was quiet certain that said stone didn't exist.
"You want to hold a bonfire, a party? Now?" I asked him, noting that he could barely stand on his own, exhausted and hanging onto the bedpost for support he nodded, the expression on his face contorted as he tried to contemplate my reasons for my concern. Bewildered, he made his way to sit before me on the other chair.
"Aye." He took my foot and placed it on his lap while he massaged the knots from my feet. "We're all bone weary, ye said it yeself, what better way to lift everyone's spirits than to hold a gathering?"
"I don't know?" A thousand thoughts flew through my mind, the catering and the hosting for one. None of us felt very social at the moment. I felt the rush of ecstasy as the muscle Jamie had been rubbing surrendered and I let out a deep sigh of relief as Jamie put down the first foot and gathered up the second. Despite the callouses on his hands, his touch was warm and soft.
"It can serve to announce Michael's birth and to celebrate Bree's birthday as well." He grinned at me, certain his idea was brilliant, and picking up on my guilt for not having organised anything myself. Damn, how did he read my mind like that?
I closed my eyes, too tired to open them again without effort. "I don't think Jenny will go for it." I warned him, as I felt his warm hands pressing into the knotted flesh of my soul, I knew she wouldn't. She was already complaining that there was too much work to be done, too many extra mouths to feed this winter. Three more families had come to join us on the estate and Jamie had insisted on sharing some of our food stores with them while they established themselves. I didn't disagree with him, but the strain on our limited resources was starting to show, we had the funds from the cattle of course, but it was too risky to buy so many supplies without being noticed.
"Let me worry about Jenny." Jamie insisted, as I let out a defiant sigh and rubbed my belly as the occupant turned and wriggled inside. I hoped the child would let me sleep tonight, it had been restless lately like its cousin and its sister and I hadn't had a decent nights sleep in weeks. Jamie leaned forward, rubbed his hands where mine had been and kissed the area above my naval. I played with the curls of his dusty red hair as he rested his head a moment, then smiled as he looked up at me and smiled back. "Ye look worn out mo nighean donn, come." He held out a hand and pulled me onto my feet and into his warm inviting chest. Slowly he undid the laces of my bodice and took off my corset and then my skirt with a skill borne of years of practice till only my shift remained, tossing them aside. "Dinner can wait. Lay with me a while and rest ye head. It's been a long day Sassenach and I just want to hold ye in my arms a moment while I'm still awake enough to do so." He didn't wait for my reply, leading me to the bed and laying me down blissfully beside him. I tried to stay awake, to enjoy the feel of him beside me and the scent of a long day out in the field, dry hay, sweat and a hint of lemon grass, but I heard him snore softly behind me and I closed my eyes to join him.
JAMMF
I woke sometime later feeling much more refreshed and with the odd sensation that I was alone in the bed. I reached out beside me finding only warm sheets beneath my fingers. He hadn't been gone long. Lifting my head I looked around the room and saw him, standing by the fire, bare as a newborn, his taught buttocks sending warm thoughts through me as I watched him stoke the flames. Beside him I saw a tray with two meals on it keeping warm by the fire. Jenny or one of the girls must have brought it up while we were asleep, as I was fairly certain, or at least I hoped, that Jamie would at least have put his kilt on before going to fetch us something to eat. I looked at the clock, it was barely ten at night and I listened for the sound of people below. To my surprise, the house was quiet, even the wails of Michael and Em were distinctly absent, too absent. I looked around the room again and then noticed that even Em's basket was gone. Had Jenny taken her to sleep with them for the night I wondered? Jamie hadn't noticed me wake and was standing by the fire, reading something intently, a note left on the tray by the looks of it. I gathered the covers around me to keep warm "Where are the children?" I asked him.
"Mrs McNeil has them." Jamie nodded, "She offered to take them for the night and Jenny agreed. Murtagh's taken them."
"She what?" How could Jenny just give her child away, and mine? I made to get out of bed to go after them but Jamie grabbed my arm and stopped me. "It's payment." He explained, "For the food we gave them last week. She's got four bairns of her own and she kens what she's doing." Jamie insisted, "Jenny's sent young Maggie with them just in case."
"You can't be happy about this surely?" I had a sudden urge to go down to Mrs McNeil's croft and make sure my children were safe. A widow herself, two of her sons were almost fully grown, her daughter was Maggies age and she had another daughter a year younger. Rationally I knew that Jamie was right, that they were safe, but the thought that Em wasn't close by, where I could keep her safe, sent unpleasant ripples through my body.
"If it gives us a good nights sleep, I cannae say I disagree." Jamie reflected truthfully, listening again to the sounds of a quiet house for once. "Best take our luck while it comes Sassenach, there'll be three bairns in the house in a matter of weeks and there'll be no rest for anyone then." I looked towards the hall outside, to the nursery at the end filled with beds and sleeping children and I rubbed my belly absently, he was right. Em was only eight months old and I was already close to seven months pregnant myself. In less than three months we would have three children under the age of one in the house and silence and sleep would be a distant memory. I sank back into the bed and let out a sigh of defeat. Jamie watched me intently, I knew he'd go and get them back if I asked him but I nodded and relaxed my defences. I saw Jamie's lip curl as he grinned at his minor win, and then at me. He placed the letter on the tray and he pulled me closer to join me, taking my hand in his.
"You're right." I surrendered as he stroked my hair where it fell across my cheek and I wrapped my arms around the back of his neck. "It's just…"
"I ken Sassenach." He said kissing the top of my head, "I feel the same, but I trust that Murtagh will see them safe." Jamie brushed my cheek with the back of his hand and I felt his gaze linger on me a moment more. "Just say the word mo gradh and I'll fetch them back for ye."
"Do you know what I want to do?" I told him seductively, his eyes meeting mine as his lip curled at the infliction in my voice.
"Aye, but ye'll tell me anyway Sassenach I suppose." He said kissing me on the forehead again.
I looked towards the tray on the hearth, "I want to eat this meal." I began softly and slowly, playing with the curls of his hair at the back of his neck "And then I want to crawl under those sheets with you and stay there, wrapped in your arms until tomorrow afternoon."
"Well Sassenach." Jamie leaned down to kiss me, his lips warm as they engulfed mine "You certainly know what a man wants to hear." He smiled, passing me a bowl of hot stew and a spoon and we sat there, eating in silence and enjoying each other's company, alone for the first time in weeks.
JAMMF
"It's just a few people Jenny, there's naught much for ye to do just a few stews. I'll go hunting with Fergus and the boys tomorrow. There are still some deer left deep in the forest and the other tenants will be glad to help."
"Help. Help ye say, like I havna enough people underfoot here as it is?" Jenny glared at her brother, waving the spoon in her hand with displeasure, "Aye, and I suppose you'll be wanting me to see to all the preparations and such, and the cleaning up afterwards?"
"No, of course not. Rabbie and Fergus would be more than happy to help." Jamie offered peering over at the two boys in the corner, watching on with amusement as he gestured for them to step forward. Fergus put down the apple he had been turning over in his hand and tugged at Rabbie to stand taller.
"Aye." Fergus stepped forward, "We will have everything under control Milady." He bowed and went to stand by Jenny, looking around the room like a professional eyeing off his latest challenge. Then using his best French charm, Fergus grabbed Jenny by the elbow and escorted her towards the nearby seat. "You just rest Milady, I have everything under control here." He grinned, waving a reluctant Rabbie over to him.
"Aye, and I am the Virgin Mary." Jenny scoffed, standing up from her seat and taking back her kitchen. She nodded at Jamie then smiled "I suppose ye have a point though, and we could all do with a little celebrating around here." Jenny eyed Fergus, tasting her latest stew in the corner and smacked him on the backside to shoo him away.
"So you'll do it?" Jamie asked excitedly. He knew his sister well enough to know how to bend her will to his.
"Aye. I suppose I will." Jenny nodded "Now get, all of ye, I've got a lot to do if we are to be ready in time."
"Thank ye Jenny." Jamie bowed and kissed his sister on the forehead, "I'll send Claire in to help ye if ye like."
"You will not." Jenny said a little too abruptly for her own liking, "I mean, I'm sure she has enough to do looking after Michael and Em and tending to her garden."
"Aye." Jamie tried to supress a grin, he knew what Jenny thought of Claire's cooking attempts and he was often grateful that Claire couldna understand the Gaelic language especially when Jenny had her dander up, "I ken she cannae cook, but I'm sure she can peel a potato or two for ye." Jamie went to leave, then remembered his promise to Claire, and turned back wondering how best to approach the topic, "Jenny, mo gradh, there was one more thing." He hesitated, biting his lip,
"What is it?" Jenny asked already distracted by her preparations for her next culinary creation.
"It's Bree's birthday ye ken, and….."
"Aye." Jenny grinned at her brother, "I'll see she has a wee cake. I dinnae know when I will get the time, but I'll make sure of it." Jamie walked back over and gave his sister another kiss on the forehead, she was too good to him and he knew it.
"Mama would be right proud of ye Jenny. You're a fine woman." Jamie told her.
"Enough of that." Jenny blushed, "Now off to the fields with ye. Ian will be waiting." Jamie bowed gracefully and left Jenny to her kitchen, glad to have one more item marked off of his to do list for the day.
JAMMF
Jamie got his gathering three days later. The night was still early, the sun was still in the sky above but already there were men, woman and families gathered around, sipping on Jamie's newest batch of whisky, sampling Jenny's cooking and relaxing after another long day in the fields. I sat on the makeshift bench made from hay bales and an old wooden plank, watching as hands were shaken, memories shared and the sounds of laughter filled the air. It was nice to be surrounded by company again, to forgot the trials of day to day life and just be. Mrs McNeil was currently seated beside me, enlightening me on how to cure Young Ian's rash with her herbs, and I was educating her with my medical knowledge on how to treat minor infections with my latest experimental ointment. She was sceptical at first, but more open minded to my exotic ways than most who still believed in the old ways of evil spirits and unseen demons instead of germs and common sense. Jamie smiled at me from across the yard, where he was talking to three of his tenants about some new adventure he had planned. I smiled back, overjoyed to see him at ease and enjoying life for a while. Bree and the other children played nearby and Mrs Crook had created a roster of local woman to watch over Ian, Em and Michael as they slept upstairs so that everyone could enjoy the festivities. I took another sip of my ale and took in the wonderful sights around me. Tonight we was free, no English or war, famine or despair just a gathering of joyous neighbours enjoying their tiny corner of the world.
"Are ye well Sassenach?" Jamie asked me a while later, as the sun started to set and the crowd gathered closer to the unlit fire. He leaned over the top of me as he handed me a fresh glass of ale, kissing my head then hovering a moment before taking a seat beside me. Jamie grabbed my hand and held it in his between his thighs, his thumb rubbing back and forth across my knuckles. The air was cool and the warmth of his flesh against mine was just what I needed.
"I'm wonderful." I smiled at him, "You were right Jamie. This is just what we needed."
"Aye." He said looking over towards Jenny and Ian, who were also sitting on a bench opposite the unlit fire, leaning into each others arms and chatting away pleasantly. "It's always a good thing to be reminded of what one has to be thankful for, especially when times are tough." Jamie wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer, shielding me from the cool night breeze that was starting to join us. "I may not be a rich man Sassenach, but I've plenty to be grateful for that's for sure. I've you and the bairns, Jenny, Ian and their bairns, Lallybroch and the men. That's more than I could have ever have hoped for, especially after…." He stopped, almost without realising and I leaned in and squeezed his arm.
"I know what you mean." I whispered to him, we had thought everything lost after Culloden, to have each other again was more than we could have hoped for, but to have all of this too was almost surreal. I reached up and kissed him on the cheek, breaking him free of his momentary trance. I felt him flinch as he the distant memory faded, then he reached out and rested a hand on my swollen stomach, "I am so glad we came back Jamie, that you got to meet Bree and for Elizabeth." I told him.
"Aye." I heard the quiver in his voice as a tear threatened to fall from his eyes, "I could lose it all mo gradh, as long as I still had you and the bairns. You are most precious to me, more than ye could ever know."
"We know Jamie." I leaned into him, resting my head on his shoulder, "We know and you are just as special to us." I placed my hand on top of his and we sat in silence for a moment, speaking to each other without words. The light faded to a soft pink hue eventually and Jamie shifted uneasily beside me, I was about to ask him what he was doing, when he pulled a small handkerchief from his sporran and handed it to me.
"I got ye this when I was away last spring." He began and my mind wandered back to when he was away selling the cattle, when the English had come. "I wanted to get ye something, to make sure you were safe." Jamie's words were strangled, almost sorrowful as I looked at him bewildered. Jamie didn't say anything more, he simply undid the cloth bandage that he fumbled with in his hands and I found myself looking down stunned by the precious item inside. An exquisite unpolished sapphire, the size of an old dime, fashioned into a beautiful necklace with a strip of blackened leather. Even now, in the dim light, it sparkled with beauty.
"My god Jamie." I exclaimed, "It's beautiful." My hands shook a little as I tried to pick it up, and Jamie took it from me, pushing aside my hair where it hung loose over my shoulders so that he could fasten it around my neck. It hung perfectly just above my breasts and I looked at it, then at Jamie. "I love you Jamie. It's perfect."
"Happy Anniversary." He smiled at me, tracing his hands over the gem before wrapping his arm around my shoulder again. "Ye said once that gems could keep ye safe, when ye travel ye ken, so I wanted to make sure that you and the bairn had as much protection as I could give ye." I felt him shudder softly, recalling the tiny ring he had given me of his mother's when I had left to have Em. It was a grand ring and I was saddened that it hadn't survived the trip back, but nothing that compared to this.
"Happy Anniversary." Not the anniversary of our marriage, but the anniversary of when we had first met, when I had first travelled through the stones. I reached up and kissed him, placing my hand on his cheek trying not to think of what my life would have been like without him. How empty it would have been. "I love it I do. But it must have cost a fortune, are you sure we can afford this?"
"Dinna Fash yeself Sassenach. We made a good profit from the cattle, enough to see us through the winter, and to start again next spring when the snow clears." He said, transforming back to a more matter of fact tone. "I'll see my family, my men safe and fed, but my first priority will always be you mo nighean donn. I made an oath to ye Claire that I would always look after ye, and I mean to fulfil it no matter what it costs me." I blushed, remembering the night he had made that oath, and he felt it. He brushed my flushed face ever so gently and I swallowed hard, recalling what that oath had cost him, more than he had ever realised. Jamie had given his body to Randall because of that oath, been exiled to Paris, fought a long and bitter war for Prince Charles in my vein attempts to change the future, he had torn his own heart out to send me away to safety and he had missed the opportunity to see Bree born, to watch her achieve so many milestones, and then he had sent me away again to see Em born safe. Jamie had sacrificed so much in the name of my safety, and for others. It wasn't fair. And now he would be forced to send me away yet again, to miss his child being born for the fourth time. Jamie would never mention what his oath had cost him, but I knew he had regrets. As did I and that the weight of those choices weighed heavy on us, especially now. I rubbed my hand across my belly, then reached up to feel the warm gem in my fingers as I made a few oaths of my own. I didn't turn my head to face him, instead looking towards the pile of dead trees and twigs before us. "Jamie." I whispered, trying to force the words to come out calmly.
"Hmm?" He replied, taking a sip of his ale as he tried to compose himself.
"What if I don't go? Back through the stones I mean?" I waited, and felt Jamie sit up, pushing me away from him as he looked down to meet my gaze.
"What are ye saying Sassenach?" A look of confusion mixed with disapproval marked his face, his brow line wrinkled in deep thought.
"What if I stayed here? Had the baby at Lallybroch I mean?" I saw the recognition of what I was saying in his eyes. Jamie took a moment, then answered strongly.
"No! It's too dangerous." Jamie shook his head, hard. "Ye said so yeself Sassenach."
"I'm not saying there won't be some danger, no more than most anyway." I admitted, "But with Jenny and the midwife, the lieutenant…. Em's birth went quite well all things considered." I could hear myself lying to him, to myself, but believing in the lie also. Jamie brushed the hair from my eyes and thought about it a moment and I tried not to let my own doubts show.
"NO." He said again. "I'll not risk ye Sassenach, not for anything."
"I wouldn't mind." I wanted him with me, wanted him to be there, to be the first person to hold his son in his arms. "I'm willing to risk it. I don't want to be apart from you again." On this I was sure, but then, regretting it almost as soon as I said it, I whispered. "You've risked so much for us already. I'd risk it for you Jamie, to chance letting you see your son born into the world." I felt his body tense up, almost angry as he took me by the shoulders and stood me firmly before him so that I could read every mark on his face.
"Don't say that Sassenach, don't ever say that." He yelled at me, several heads nearby turned to look at us, then seeing Jamie embrace me with an assuring grin, turned back to their own conversations.
"Why not?" I argued back quietly holding him tight as his hand cupped the back of my neck tightly, "You would die for me, I know you would."
"That's different. No!" He shook his head firmly. "Yes I'd die for ye Sassenach, I'd kill for ye, defend ye, protect ye till my last breath but I willna have ye do the same for me. To leave me behind, knowing that I killed ye. No!" He shook his head again, "I couldna bear it." Jamie pulled me close to him, burying my face in his chest so deep I could barely breath, "I won't risk ye life for anything Sassenach, I would die myself before I let ye risk ye life for me." Jamie held me for the longest moment, then released his grip slightly, "Promise me Claire." he finally began, "Promise me ye'll go through the stones. For me, for the bairn."
"I promise Jamie. I promise." I held him tight, he was still rigid, but he tried to reassure me that he was making the right decision and I felt a sense of guilt for the fear I had awakened inside of him.
"Jamie." Ian called out from the other side of the yard. I felt Jamie smile, only the stiffened neck muscles and his tense hand betraying the turmoil within. "Would ye like to do the honour of lighting the fire?" Ian shouted out, signalling to everyone that the fire was about to be lit.
"Aye. I'll be with ye in a moment." Jamie called back. He kissed me softly on the head, then stood up and let me go. "I'm sorry I was cross with ye." He apologised, "But there aren't a great many things in this life ye ken that scare me, but the thought of losing you Claire, I fear that most of all."
"I know Jamie." I apologised back, "And I'm sorry." the tension and angst between us released, we found a sense of peace again. Jamie stood up and bowed before me then went to join Ian and several other men as they prepared to light the giant bonfire and get the nights festivities underway.
JAMMF
The roaring light of the fire replaced the dull light of dusk. Sounds of laughter, random cheers and toasts and good tidings passed around like wildfire and everyone was in high spirits. Although we found ourselves entertained by different social groups, Jamie and I never took our eyes off of each other, always aware of where the other was. My only distraction, other than keeping an eye on Brianna who was currently playing another game of chase with the other children, was the sight of Maggie, flirting subtly with young William who had lived with us for a while after his house burned down a year ago. The two of them had only seen each other a half dozen times since then, but I was all too aware of the kindling fascination they had with each other. Maggie was only nine and William soon to be ten. It would be a few more years before any formal agreement could be entered into but that didn't stop a young impressionable girl from dreaming. Jenny didn't seem to notice, but then again, I had learned long ago not to underestimate what Jenny did and did not know about what was going on under her roof.
Not too far away, I also noticed that Fergus, Rabbie and young Jamie were also watching a group of young girls from afar, teasing and jostling each other, too scared to make the first move. It seemed so long since I had been that age, since I had had my first crush and I envied them a little, then I looked to Jamie and reflected on the deeper love that we had found together in the years since, and how grateful I was to have found it. Jamie noticed my gaze and nodded, smiling. I blew him a kiss, and he looked stunned for a moment, the way he did when I did something out of the usual from his time but perfectly normal from my own, then he smiled wider than before at me, his blue eyes sparkling in the firelight as they stared longingly at my own until he found himself being pulled back into his conversation with Dougal McIntyre. Everyone wanted to drink and celebrate a fine harvest with the Laird, for they all knew the situation but old habits were hard to break, and to wish him a fine son soon to be born. There was no way I could see, almost ashamedly given my current thoughts, that we would be able to slip out unnoticed for a celebration of our own.
Ian and Jenny had just as many well wishers surrounding them, as did I, and for a moment I rather felt like the queen herself, mobbed in the street by her fans all wanting to say that they had touched her, spoken to her and that they were considered one of their closest confidants. Jamie had gathered a large number of followers after Culloden, many of the men who had followed him to the fields, been trained by him and then been safely returned had sworn him a lifelong oath to serve him in return for his kindness and gratitude. It made Jamie feel uncomfortable to be worshiped so, as it did myself, and I found myself wondering just how many of these men would have been lost if we hadn't have tried to change the future. Looking around, I realised that most of them would have perished in the war, if not in the years afterwards and I quickly dispelled the sickening thought from my mind.
I made my excuses and moved through the crowd towards Jenny, who was starting to clear away the pots full of half warm stew. I didn't particularly want to be doing the dishes at a time like this, but it was as good an excuse as any to take a break from everything that was going on and to find some quiet solitude. I was never one for large crowds, and had found over the years that the key to surviving such occasions was to have a little down time in between. "Here." I said reaching out and taking a pot from Jenny as she tried to juggle three at once, "Let me help you."
"I wouldna say no." Jenny smiled at me. "I thought it best to clear these away before they spoiled." She explained making her way inside. Then she slowed, glanced behind her and whispered, "And between you and me, a needed a wee break from Mrs McNeil."
"I know what you mean." I confided in her, having escaped the woman earlier in the night. Mrs McNeil was a lovely woman, but she did like to talk and seemed highly motivated in her task to make us find her favourable.
"Ye ken, I was mighty cross with him when he first suggested it." Jenny began a moment later, making her way into the kitchen and placing her burden on the bench before her, "But I had a lot of fun tonight, I haven't laughed so hard in years."
"Me either." I admitted and we both laughed at that, tired and happy. We had both shouldered the burden of being strong for too long and tonight we could let all that go and just be ourselves. "Thank you Jenny." I said, placing my pot beside hers as we stood in the kitchen just catching our breath.
"What for?" She asked, looking confused and almost stunned like she'd never been thanked before in her life and didn't know how to respond.
"I've never had a sister before, but you've taken me in, looked after me and made me feel like I belong. I can't say that there'd be many who would have believed me under the circumstances, or that would have let me stay under their roof if they did." Most folk feared 'the fairies' and I shuddered at how they had treated me when they had thought me a witch all those years ago.
"Aye, well." Jenny blushed, looking away as if her reaction was inexcusable, "I've not had a sister before either and I have to say that although ye do confuse me sometimes Claire, I'm mighty glad to have known ye as well." Overtaken by a sense of belonging we hugged each other briefly then stepped back, taken off guard by the odd sensation caused by the brief moment of intimacy between us. "Ye a fine woman Claire, and although ye not what I pictured for my brother, anyone can see how much you belong to each other." She added, grabbing a fresh plate of bannocks and odd savoury items. "Here." She handed it to me then collecting another "They'll be getting hungry out there and we don't want them to eat the stores we have put away for winter."
"No. We wouldn't want that." I agreed as I heard the faint sound of some musical instrument, accompanied by a makeshift drum and several voices signing old Gaelic limericks. I knew from past events that things were about to become even more festive, and if any of the men were still standing in a few hours' time then it would be a miracle indeed.
JAMMF
I followed Jenny as she made her way outside, passing the plates around for a moment before resting them on the nearby table and going to join the others. It wasn't long before I found Jamie, standing by a group of men singing and passing around their jugs of ale in celebration. He reached out a hand for me to join him and grabbing my wrist he pulled me in close as he placed an arm around my waist holding me in place. "Marvellous timing Sassenach." Jamie smiled at me, "Old Duncan here was trying to get me to join him in a wee ballad, but I told him that I must see to the horses and fetch us some more ale before we run dry. Would ye like to take a wee walk with me?" He asked doing his best to wink at me inconspicuously.
"I would love to." I said, wincing slightly as Jamie squeezed me, begging for me to follow his lead. I nodded to the men, who cheered to my good health, and let Jamie turn me and lead me away. "What was all that about?" I asked him once we were far enough away from the fire not to be overheard. Jamie looked back towards the men, looked back down at me and smiled.
"Tis nothing Sassenach. Ye ken well enough I cannae hold a tune and I've not drunk nearly enough to try."
"I see." I said, poking him in the ribs with my finger as I wriggled out of his embrace. "So you made me your accomplice, lying to your tenants."
"Our tenants." He reminded me, "And aye." He nodded, "Though I dinnae think ye'd mind. I saw ye trying to avoid Mrs McNeil earlier and I thought ye might need a little saving yeself."
"I did. Thank you." The night air was cool and I shivered a little. Jamie drew me in close to him and the heat of his body warmed me instantly. We made our way together, heading towards the tower, where Jamie had some of the whisky stashed. As we walked through the main entrance, Jamie lit one of the lanterns by the door and the room filled with a dull light. I could see the whiskey barrels, the crates used to transport the smaller bottles to the nearby crofts and in the corner, several hay bales covered with an array of old tartans, used as seating while the men worked and brewed fresh ale during the day.
"Here Sassenach, have a seat." Jamie said escorting me to the nearby bale. He moved into the darkness and returned seconds later with a small bottle in his hand, "Would ye like to try some of the latest batch? It has a while to age yet but it'll wet ye throat."
"I'd love to." I said reaching out and taking the bottle from him. The liquid was warm and soothing and it made my lips tingle a little. The ale's he was creating were getting better and he was beginning to get a name for himself throughout the highlands. I closed my eyes, relishing the sensation. I closed my eyes as I took another sip. Jamie placed a hand on my cheek startling me, but I didn't flinch. I enjoyed the sensation of feeling his large palm resting over my left cheek and I felt his lips hovering over mine. My neck tilted back instinctively and his hand slid down to take me by the back of my head. Lips entwined, I opened my eyes and reached out grabbing the front of his shirt, pulling him closer to me. "Don't stop." I whispered as I felt him hesitate.
"Are ye sure it's all right Sassenach?" He whispered as he continued.
"Verry." I mumbled, finding it hard to talk. I felt his other hand slide down my side and come to rest on my waist. He pulled me closer and I felt the heat of him against my swollen belly. Warm and inviting. Jamie began to kiss me softly and religiously from neck to navel, my skin tingled and I tried not to cry out as my body called out, craving for his.
Just as Jamie had undone the front of my corset and was sliding my shift off of my shoulder, we heard the sound of muffled voices just outside the door. Caught stunned, like deer in headlights, we froze and tried to decide whether we should pull apart from our embrace and act as if nothing had happened, or to continue and hope that we weren't discovered. I tried to supress a giggle, and Jamie placed a hand over my mouth to stifle the sound. The instinct to laugh was only made worse when he cocked his head to the side, warning me not to make any noise. When the person outside made no attempt to move away, Jamie placed a hand to his own lips and whispered "Shhh." Before he sat me up more comfortably on the bench, pulled the shift back over my shoulder and straightened his kilt before going to investigate who was there.
"And just what do ye think you are up to?" I heard him yell at the intruder, he was clearly surprised by who he had found, and none too pleased.
"I was just looking for…." It was Fergus. I'd know that French accent anywhere and he sounded afraid for his life.
"I ken what you were looking for." Jamie raised his voice disapprovingly, "Have you no shame, what of the lasses' honour?"
"I didn't, I wouldn't, I wasn't." The poor boy scrambled for words,
"Weren't ye just? And just what did ye have in mind then?" Jamie asked impatiently.
"I was just going to talk to the lass? Show her around and get to know here a little better. Like ye told me."
There was a frustrated grunting noise and I supressed another chuckle, I wasn't sure if Jamie heard it, but I did hear him clear his throat again.
"Aye well." Watching his shadow, I could see Jamie shifting his weight as he stood a little taller, more intimidating, "I think maybe ye may have misunderstood what I was telling ye." And then in a more forgiving tone, "Take the lass back to the others, share a drink with her aye, and have ye conversations but stay where the others can see ye, ye ken."
"Yes Milord." There was a brief shuffling of feet and then Jamie returned, a small grin on his face.
"You were a bit hard on him weren't you?" I asked as he returned to join me, taking a large gulp of whiskey as I handed him the flask.
"And if the lass's father found them up here. How hard do ye think he'd be on him then?"
"I see your point." I admitted thinking about what we were about to do 'up here', reaching out and taking his hand I pulled him back down beside me.
"So you were teaching Fergus about how to court a lady were you?" I teased him, wondering exactly how that conversation had gone.
"Aye." Jamie grinned, he hadn't had the benefit of such advice himself and had learned most of what he knew about woman after he had been married.
"And what exactly did ye tell him?" I smirked, playing with the front of his shirt as his hands made their way under my skirts.
"Shaw, let me show you." Jamie grabbed me fierce, resuming our previous positions. He kissed me intensely, then placed his hands behind me as he supported my weight. "What about the bairn?" He paused to ask, starting to tilt me backwards then hesitating as I moaned a little.
"Shhh." I made a move, tipping him over so that he was beneath me, then with a well-practiced move, I released his belt and watched it fall to the floor. I climbed on top of his lap, and he placed a hand on the small of my back to steady me. The sensation of his flesh on mine drove me deeper and I grabbed his shoulders, moving myself up and down as he joined me. He played with my hair at first, then his hands moved down to my waist, lifting me up and down on top of him. My body ached for his as much as his ached for mine and I felt the surge of spirit leave my soul as it entered into his. My back arched and I fell forward into him, thoroughly pleased. Jamie held me close afterwards, letting me rest on his shoulder as we struggled to catch our breaths.
"Are ye all right mo nighen donn?" He asked eventually, grabbing his plaid and placing it around my shoulders to guard against the chill. "I dinnae hurt ye?" We had been a bit more forceful than usual, and I had felt my body strain under the motions but I had no regrets. It had been wonderful.
"We're fine Jamie." I promised him, sliding off of his lap and onto the seat beside him. He rubbed my belly, making sure I wasn't lying then nodded and picked up the discarded bottle of ale he took a sip then handed it to me.
"When I saw ye by the fire, ye hair blowing in the breeze and the light shining of ye fine skin, I just had to have ye." He apologised, "God ye beautiful Claire."
"So are you Jamie." I said, kissing him softly on the neck as he pulled me closer to him, taking me in his arms. "I was watching you by the fire too." I told him, "Thinking the exact same thing." Jamie turned to look at me shocked, I knew he didn't think that women should say such things, that their minds should be pure and not full of sin. He also knew, after great experience, that my thoughts were just as lustful as his own.
"You're a rare woman mo nighean donn and I am so very glad to be able to say that yer mine."
We hid in the tower for another few minutes, then regretfully, we straightened our clothes, held ourselves in one last embrace and returned to our guests.
JAMMF
Jamie and I walked arm in arm back to the fire, stopping briefly at the edge of darkness for one last kiss before we would be swarmed once again by friends and family. The festivities were in full swing as I had suspected, and I was pleased to find young Fergus, sitting with young Mary McIntyre on a log by the fire, sharing a glass of ale and holding hands as they spoke. Jamie saw it too, and I felt him tense up slightly, burdening himself as he did, with making sure that the ladies honour remained intact under his watch. I smiled briefly, wondering how he was going to handle raising two daughters through puberty if this is how he responded to Fergus's first attempts to court a partner. "Are ye ready Sassenach?" Jamie asked as he took my hand and stepped forward,
"Are you?" I asked, hiding my double meaning as I squeezed his hand affirmatively and stepped forward with him.
As we entered the swarm, hand in hand, I noticed the familiar form of Mrs McNeil standing by the food bench, talking to someone who had their back to me. I squinted my eyes trying to make out the details and then, in my surprise, I let out a faint gasp.
"What is it Sassenach?" Jamie asked instinctively reaching for his dirk as he looked towards where I was pointing,
"Blessed Michael." He swore under his breath, "Is that?"
"Murtagh Fitzgibbons Fraser and he's courting Mrs McNeil." I spoke allowed, watching his body language, the quick glances, hovering his hand over hers as he poured her an ale, his endearing but infrequent smile as he pretended to laugh at what she was saying. No doubt about it, Murtagh was courting Mrs McNeil, or was she courting him?
"It's an odd match for sure." Jamie acknowledged as he stood watching, just as stunned as I was. "But I give the man credit, she is a fine catch Sassenach."
"She can cook and clean and keep house if that's what you mean." I glared at him, knowing full well that he had come to terms with the fact long ago that I could do neither of those things.
"Ye ken very well that's not what I mean mo nighean donn." Jamie placed a hand around my waist almost daring me to break free, "Besides. There's more to being a wife than just keeping a man feed and clean. And ye do that just fine mo gradh, if I do say so myself." I smiled at him, then looked at Murtagh and Mrs McNeil trying to imagine the two of them together. I couldn't, but he was a sweet man who deserved someone to look after him, and Mrs McNeil was a sweet lady who longed for a man to look after and to keep her company at night and who could provide for her and the four children from her late husband. It may not be an obvious match, but if things went well, it would be a match that was good for them both.
"No wonder." I said aloud finally putting two and two together.
"What are ye thinking Sassenach?" Jamie asked suspiciously.
"It all makes sense. Murtagh offered to take Michael and Em to Mrs McNeils three times last week. I thought he was just to watch over the children and give us a break, but now…." I said, pausing for effect, "What if he was using the children as an excuse to see her?"
"Ye may be right Sassenach." Jamie nodded then began walking us towards the crowd again.
"And Mrs McNeil, the way she has been with Jenny and myself. You don't think she was trying to….. to bribe us? To make us like her so we would agree to the match?"
"I dinnae ken the ways of women Sassenach, but what if she were, would it make much of a difference? If Murtagh likes her that's enough for me." He said, as I stood frozen recalling all of our recent conversations. "Come. Let's see to our guests and then I want to take ye to bed." Jamie winked at me, squeezing my hand tight in his as he dragged me along behind him.
