For All the Wrong Reasons
by Lemon & Chai
Characters: Yukimura, Fuji, Tezuka, Sanada, and Atobe.
Warning: Bondage, S&M, D/s, and well everything else. Yuki-muse is horny.
Inspired by kitti-chan and lolistar.
Part 28
Fuji was not smiling. He was not even pretending to smile, as he often did. His lips were curved into a cold, calm frown, mirroring the chilling calm within his eyes.
He was quick to change back into his uniform, and was shoving his dressy clothes without a care into his duffel bag. He hadn't spoken a word for the entire limo ride or since.
"What are you doing?" Yukimura hissed, his voice barely under control as he finished tying his bath robe around him, all thoughts of a warm sauna ripped from his mind.
"I'm going home," the brunette finally spoke, his voice dark and hard. It was not a tone Yukimura had heard before, and certainly not one he could allow.
"Our date's not over yet!" The screeching captain tore the bag away from Fuji and dumped its contents all over the floor. The others must have heard the noise, for they rushed in from the hallway where they'd been arguing about the fight.
"I don't want to be here," Fuji stated coldly. "Tezuka was right, this isn't going to work."
His eyes were hidden behind his bangs, but his intentions were clear. All five teens knew that once Fuji left, he wouldn't come back... and then it would be over. Everything.
A heavy chill settled in the room, and Yukimura felt as though his very bones were freezing. His throat dried out along with his eyes, which suddenly refused to close. "...Why," he forced out, unable to stop his voice from trembling. "... At least tell us why..." He'd worked so hard. He wasn't sure if he could succeed, but once they had Tezuka on board he was sure they could work out the little things.
He'd chosen carefully. From the beginning, he'd crafted a net using everything he could - he carefully pursued the ex lover of Sanada's new boyfriend, marveling at his luck that Fuji was clearly still in love with his bespectacled captain. From there, he'd drawn in Atobe, whose resources in both finances and sex would be essential to handling a five man orgy. The diva had pulled Sanada in once before and would be the perfect bait to hook his raven haired vice captain onto the reel. Destiny threw another sword when Yukimura learned that indeed, as he had desperately hoped, Tezuka still had feelings for Fuji - and he'd been ecstatic to discover how deep those feelings really were.
It felt like heaven itself was aiding him in placing the pieces, starting with hooking Sanada up with one of the few people who Yukimura could use to bring him back. They could be together again... and the other three would make up for Yukimura's trauma-induced inability to be the kind of sweet, uke lover that Sanada needed.
From there, he'd simply lined up the pieces, and knotted them all together. But the one piece he always thought he'd have, the kitten he'd claimed easily at the start, was defying him... no, this was something else. This wasn't a Fuji he knew. This wasn't the Fuji he'd spent the last few months with, laughing and hurting and playing and having sex with. This Fuji he couldn't control... this Fuji would not submit... a strong, distant Fuji was the one walking away, and short of truly forcing him down and raping him, this was not a Fuji he could dominate.
"... Syuusuke..." This was the one piece he never imagined he'd lose. Even if he couldn't have Sanada, he was sure that Fuji would be with him.
But the Fuji before him looked up with hard eyes, taking back his bag as he sharply replied, "You saw how I am. I'm a monster."
" . . . " Yukimura's eyes widened as his memories tore back to the dark alley in Shibuya, to the brunette's ice cold eyes and the two glinting nails protruding from the end of the wooden plank in his hand. "...but... you were only trying to defend yourself-"
"No!" Fuji screamed, slamming his bag down. "I was trying to kill him!"
He kicked aside the lady's sandals blocking his path, and it was clear he planned to leave even if he couldn't take anything. He bent over only for his wallet, but Atobe grabbed his wrist as he stood up.
"You saw me," cold eyes turning sharply to the diva, Fuji sneered, "I tried to kill him! I meant to. I wanted to! My father too-!"
At the strength of his glare, even the king of Hyotei faltered, and Fuji swept towards the doorway, which Sanada stood in to block.
"You can't stand there forever," Fuji warned darkly, and even though Sanada was twice his size, the vice captain felt a shiver run down his spine.
Tezuka moved between them, blocking the way as well. "Syuusuke, you're still angry." Only the stoic brunette appeared unaffected, though Fuji smirked cruelly as though he were winning in their battle of glares. "Calm down and explain."
"You too?" Fuji snapped, once he realized his messy haired captain wasn't going to budge. Yukimura was still seething behind him, but the bluenette was too shocked to make any particular move. They were all staring, staring and silent, at the smallest of them who was showing fangs they'd thought unimaginable, and the coldest, sharpest glare... "Isn't this what you wanted? Me to leave? This to end?"
Tezuka chewed out a stiff reply, his fingers curling slightly into a determined fist. "What I want is what's best for you-"
"Why can't you want what's best for you?" Fuji was practically screaming, his hair seemed to lift from his shoulders with the force of his anger.
"THIS is what's best for me!" Tezuka shouted back. Unlike the others, he had seen this side of Fuji, this was just like back then, the fights they had before they broke up.
"Nothing to do with me can be good for anybody!"
"Just shut up and tell us what's wrong!" Sanada's roar stunned both of the Seigaku players, his firm gaze piercing down like a samurai going into battle. "Sit down, and talk." His voice was still harshly demanding, but more controlled as he nodded towards the bed.
It took a few more minutes, but Fuji finally caved in and sat with a harsh plot, his fingers fisting into the sheets. His ice colored eyes pierced openly into the ground, as he slowly licked his thin, dry lips. He might as well go ahead and tell them, he decided - they'd be too frightened afterward anyway, or disgusted, or whatever... to bother him after that. He didn't want to imagine what would happen to the four of them after that, but he knew it would be better than if he stayed.
"You saw me. You saw what I'm really like. I'm not sweet, nor frail. I almost killed him."
Tiny lips curled into a tight, malicious smile. "I'm not even sorry about it. If anything, I'm sorry I couldn't-"
"That was self-defense!" Yukimura cried, his voice finally cracking. He was so tired, so anxious and stressed after the fight and Fuji's defiance, and a wash of gratefulness came over him as Sanada's warm, large palm squeezed his shoulder in support.
"Was it?" Fuji lightly chuckled, but it wasn't kind, or amused, or even upset. It was a cold, empty laugh, the kind that clearly said he was laughing at you, not with you... "He was already down. I could have knocked him out easily. Or just waited for Tezuka to come in, since the knife was already pushed aside. But if I did that..." He lifted his chin, his crescent shaped grin facing up towards the ceiling, his eyes eerily hidden. "... then I wouldn't be able to get back at him, for what he almost did to Tezuka. Just stopping him wasn't enough. I had to teach him a lesson..."
"Fuji," Tezuka cut in, his deep voice rumbling against the cold. "You aren't like that, stop pretending-"
"You don't know what I'm like." Fuji's voice was quiet, yet sharper than steel. "You don't know what I'm like. I'm a monster." His eyes widened till they bulged, his pupils shrinking as if he saw into himself. "I'm a monster like my father.
"You don't know what things I've done. What things I can do." His grin widened, his lips parting slightly, an empty, endless darkness held between them. "I can hate as strongly as I can love. And when I hate, oh god, what I can do when I hate..."
Letting out a venomous chuckled, he enjoyed the shocked silence that sat around him. It was just as he thought - so ironic, that they wanted him to talk, and now were regretting it. He had to make it clear, though, who he was, what he was, to make them permanently leave him alone. Otherwise they'd later deceive themselves, once again, into thinking he was some sweet, innocent kitten, the way he always pretended to be, the way he'd even convinced himself he was, but tonight had been a reminder of everything he had shoved to the back of his subconscious, of the part of himself he kept hidden, deep within the darkness...
"It's different from just wanting to hurt someone. I'm not outraged, like Tezuka, or fighting to prove I'm in control, like Yukimura. I don't get some sort of sadistic pleasure out of it, and I'm very good at keeping my head cool, even when... even more so when I'm angry." He laughed, loudly, as if this was the most hilarious thing he'd ever heard. "My head is too cold, too ... calculating. I plot these various scenarios... it's not like planning, the way Inui does with his data, but I get a sense of what I need to do, what I want to do. I'll have several in my head before I even make my move. I think of different ways to tear them apart, to make them suffer, slowly, painfully, before finishing them off in the worst possible way.
"It doesn't mean killing them, oh no, they can suffer much more greatly the longer their alive. So no, you're correct in thinking I have yet to kill anyone, but I have made people suffer. Mizuki... Kirihara... those were just child's games, something fun to do with tennis, since I was bored with them anyway. But that time... him... I really almost killed him.
"My father... I almost killed him."
A rush of air escaped his mouth, as he suddenly felt something crack. He didn't know if it was his mind, or his heart, or his voice, but something... broke. The secret. The story his family had him practice, had practiced over and over with him, about what happened. He hadn't bothered to tell his lovers the lie, but he hadn't told them the truth, either.
The ice that held the secret cracked.
But the silence in the room grew more frozen as it did.
"That night... when Father hit Yuuta...
"My mother was drying a cast iron pan on the stove. I was so little, I could barely reach it, and it was so heavy, I could barely carry it. But it was strange, because that night, I didn't feel the weight at all. I calmly took the pan from the stove, and there my father was, leaning over Yuuta who was barely conscious, and before he could hit Yuuta again...
"I hit him.
"I hit him first, with the pan. Not just once. Once was only enough to stun him. I hit him again. And again. And again. And again. In my mind, in my memory, I hit him so many times, it was endless. He was unconscious long before I was done... before my mother and sister grabbed me and the pan and forced it to stop.
"I wasn't just trying to stop him. I was killing him. I wanted him dead. It wasn't something noble, like I was trying to save us from being hurt by him again. I just hated him. Hated him for hitting Yuuta, even though it was just once."
His eruption of laughter this time was shaky, as if whatever he'd been holding in was spilling out, boiling out like hot lava, all over the air, cracking the ice, the ice... "It's so funny, you wouldn't know. My family made up this story, when we took him to the hospital, about him banging his head on a large gardening shovel. It was so laughable, and so obviously a lie, yet no one questioned it. He had a serious concussion, he couldn't see for almost a week, and he had so much care but Yuuta was kept at home, hidden while his own head injury recovered, which wasn't bad but left that nasty scar from being untreated. So even then I-"
"Syuusuke." Tezuka's hand was on his cheek, cupping it warmly as if he were some sort of cherub, wiping at nonexistent tears as if a demon like him needed comforting-
"I tried to kill him!" Fuji screeched, jumping away hysterically, horrified that his story wasn't getting through. "I tried to murder him, like I did to that man today-"
Two lithe hands grabbed each of his cheeks, and Yukimura kissed him so hard he couldn't breath, let along speak. The sadist's message was loud and clear - Shut up.
Fuji's lips trembled as his blue haired lover pulled away. He was sure he couldn't cry, not when he felt this cold, this dark, but maybe he was. Maybe there were tears running down his cheeks and he just couldn't tell. Maybe they were dry, invisible tears, that everyone but him could feel, could see. His hands shook erratically, and his throat shook too, even though it was so dry. "But I loved him. I loved my father. I still love him. Just as I love each of you. I hated him at that moment but every other moment I loved him, and yet I still -"
"You still didn't kill him." Tezuka's voice was warm, even when it was the same flat tone as always.
"You don't know how cold I am. When I think of it, of different ways, so logically-"
"Yes, I know," his captain calmly replied. "You really are a genius, and I know that. You could have killed him. If you really wanted to - that night, or later at the hospital, any time, really. It you had really wanted him dead, he'd be dead.
"But he isn't. You stopped on your own."
"But I wanted to! I tried to. I imagined him dead-"
"Do you think you're the only one like that?" Sanada shouted, but at least he wasn't roaring like before. He just wanted to be heard. "Do you think you're the only one who's ever wanted revenge?"
"Fuji, everyone gets angry when someone they care about is hurt," Atobe interjected. "Most of us don't have the capacity or the brain power to do anything about it, the way you do, but we would if we could. If someone hurt you, I'd want to kill him too."
Sanada added with a growl, "If I ever get my hands on that nurse..."
Shaking his head, Fuji protested, "but there's a difference between wanting to and actually-"
"But you didn't kill anyone," Tezuka repeated firmly. "You stopped. You waited for me. You waited for me to stop you. And with your father - if you really wanted him dead, he would be dead by now. That time... when your mother and sister reached out to stop you..."
Biting his lower lip, Fuji shook his head. "They... were frightened... of me...otherwise... they would have stopped me sooner..."
"No," Yukimura traced his cheek in disagreement. "They were probably hoping you'd succeed. They stopped you not to protect your father, but to protect you... and even then, you could have finished him before they stepped in."
"It wasn't luck that saved your father, Syuusuke," Tezuka's hazel eyes held wide blue ones in a confident match. "It was you."
The tensai didn't know why this was happening. He didn't know why they were acting like this, making excuses for him. He didn't know why they struggled so much to accept him, even as his darkness spilled out before them, blanketing their light.
"I destroyed my family. My father left because of me. He started beating us because I was rebellious. My brother left because I crumpled his dreams. My mother pretends to be my friend, but really she just wants to be with my father. My sister just sees me as a child, otherwise she'd hate me too-"
"Your mother loves you," Yukimura gently smiled, his gracefulness smoothing away the anxiety and uncertainty that'd filled the room before. "She may not know how to express it, and it might be awkward for her to be close to you, after what happened. But she loves you, anyone could tell..."
"Everyone has someone they want to murder." Reaching towards his beloved, the bespectacled captain took Fuji's hand and pressed it to his chest, tacitly asking for his trust. "And the reasons we don't, the reasons we stop are the same reasons as for you."
"But I'm scared," cried Fuji in a tiny voice. "I'm scared of myself."
A small, rare smile crept onto Tezuka's lips, as he drew Fuji's body against his own. "You're not alone."
He's scary.
They were the words of a spectator, who'd seen Fuji's match with Kirihara. Maybe that was why Fuji made you want to control him, wrung out the slightest bit of sadism you never knew you had. Tezuka, and in a way Yukimura, had lost it because of him, had been driven mad with the need to force him to submit, perhaps because somewhere deep within them, they knew he never really did. Fuji was always the one ultimately in control.
The strong sensed the strong - Fuji drew men like Tezuka and the other captains to him like moths to an open flame. The more he feigned weakness, the more they wanted him; they all wanted to test that illusion of delicacy, to challenge that small, lithe body as a way of challenging themselves. The strong grew stronger by finding rivals, and in a way, Fuji was the ultimate rival - he was unbeatable, since he never really played. If you won against someone who wasn't at his full strength, how could you feel satisfied?
But there was no helping it. Fuji simply wasn't motivated to fight, except when others were on the line; he didn't care about his own pain, and so he took all the abuse, willingly, until his body grew to expect it, to enjoy it. The one person Fuji could never understand was himself.
Tezuka carried Fuji over to the bed, the tensai's arms and legs wrapped around him like a koala. He set his smaller teammate down gently, kissing him deeply at the same time. Their tongues danced around each other, one hesitant and pained, the other reassuring and confident. Large hands stroked the lithe one's sides, gingerly slipping off the white shirt that hid pale, smooth skin. A click and a zipper later, and then the black pants were being tugged off as well.
Something very suspiciously smile-like tugged the corners of Tezuka's lips as he bemusedly removed the girl's panties that Fuji had tucked his manhood into, thumbing the little pink bow in the center of the classic whities.
Maybe they could have talked more, but for all his ingenious brain and thoughts and articulation, Fuji responded much better to being shown physically how another person felt. His mind needed love, and so they'd pass it through by loving his body.
The other three stepped patiently out to the balcony, as Tezuka tenderly caressed and kissed and licked every inch of his lover's skin, leaving little hickeys here and there to remind the tensai that he was claimed, once again, by his captain. This was the one right reason to be in a relationship - Tezuka, in every way, loved and was in love with Fuji, and he wanted to show it to him within this moment. The past didn't matter, the future didn't matter, all they needed to worry about was now, as two saliva slicked digits pushed into the tensai's hole.
Fuji mewled and his hips thrust up into the air as he was instantly widened, the invading fingers scissoring apart to allow a third to be added. Tezuka licked across his lover's cheek, enjoying the heavy blush that appeared there, amused that despite all his lost innocence, Fuji could still be shy about quickly initiated sex.
Covering the smaller body with his own, Tezuka simply undid his pants, knowing the others would only be willing to wait so long. Directing Fuji to wrap his legs around his waist, the bespectacled captain continued to deliver deep, slow kisses, as he pressed his rigid flesh inside. The tensai bucked and whimpered into Tezuka's mouth as his body struggled to accept the dry invasion, but after a few pets and some very distracting tongue work, he managed to relax with a heavy sigh.
Tezuka moved with slow, erotic thrusts, working to remember the pace they used to share, working to regain those perfect angles and motions they had had before. It was a heaven he had forgotten, he was so deep inside his beloved, his cock was all the way to the hilt, then he would pull out almost entirely and thrust all the way back in. Below him, Fuji moaned, cried, screamed, laughed... tears spilled down his cheeks which were scrunched up into a smile. Tezuka was sure he had never felt so happy, nor felt so right before, and he was able to slow his pace, enjoy every second as he built up to his climax, wanting the moment to never end.
Syuusuke was calling out his name, calling Kunimitsu, and it sounded like a beautiful bird's song as they both shuddered, cried out, and came.
"Syuusuke," Tezuka whispered between kisses, as they panted down from their elation, "I love you."
Yukimura's lips stretched into a feral grin as he stepped over to the bed, amused by Tezuka's imprints still pressed into the mattress. Shimmering blue eyes looked up at him, and Fuji's body rolled rapidly up and down like waves as he lay panting and flushed after cuming.
Already the tenai shivered from the cold of parting, his reddened skin welcoming Yukimura's warm hands as they lay upon him. They were gentle, even as they rubbed up the brunette's arms and drew his hands towards the head of the bed, directing the smaller youth to grip the metal bar that crossed there.
"Hold," Yukimura ordered, as he disappeared for a moment to return with a few treasures from the trunk he stored here.
"I believe you've been misunderstanding some things about our relationship," the captain spoke calmly as he wove rope around the tensai's upper arms and hands, securing them skillfully to the bar. "That I've always wanted to make clear." He tested the binding, wasn't quite satisfied, and started over. "I'm not here to hurt you. I'm here to control you.
"I decide what you get, not you. If you want pain, I'll give you pleasure" Another tug, and a little smile on his lips showed that he was done. "If you want pleasure, I'll deny it with a cock ring." He showed off his second toy, a black rubber circle hooped around his finger. "Right now, you want me to take you, which is why you're so hard here-" He stroked Fuji's stiff manhood, smirk growing as he rolled the restricting loop on, enjoying the whimpers for mercy that came in response.
"I was thinking that it's been a while since we last played, so I bought this," he held up a large, black painted dildo that had two bumps like teddy bear ears at the tip, "which I believe is the perfect way to deny you."
The second Fuji parted his lips to protest, a white handkerchief was shoved into his mouth, which Yukimura tied into place with a cloth gag and an impish smile.
"It looks about Genichirou's size, don't you think?" The captain chuckled, "Or maybe a little bigger. The nice thing is..." Fitting the cock shaped tube into its intended place, he demonstrated as he spoke, "-it can go in all the way."
The pulsating hole was forced to swallow the tubular piece all the way to the plastic balls at the base, Fuji's back arching reflexively to the onslaught. His only relief was Tezuka having taken him moments before, otherwise he was sure the oversized dildo would have torn him apart.
"And it vibrates so nicely."
The bluenette added a few extra touches - a pair of nipple clips that pinched each nub into a hard little peak, and a black leather collar pulled just a little tight, enough to put a bit of pressure on his captive's windpipe - then sat back and whistled approvingly at his work. Those cerulean eyes were begging, spilling needy tears, reddened skin covering every exposed inch of the tensai's body as he bucked wildly in a impossible attempt for self-satisfaction.
Yukimura amused himself for a bit by rubbing his captive's cock with his hand, thumbing off pre-cum and humming along with the muffled moans of his favorite victim.
"I was going to play with you more, but actually, I'm feeling quite tired. I had a bit of play time myself with the tango pair over there," he signed longingly to himself as he remembered, "and anyway, my turn is just about up." He brushed himself off as he stood, and gave Fuji's jerking leg one last hard pinch to the thigh before stepping away.
"It's your loss, today," he waved, as he disappeared out onto the balcony, leaving the honey haired tensai squirming and gagged.
Seeing the incubus with his hands tied up over his head and wiggling helplessly made Sanada snort. He understood now that Fuji allowed this to happen, and though he would never want it for himself, so long as the tensai enjoyed it, it was good that someone could accept Seiichi's horribly sadistic impulses.
And the burly vice captain would be lying to his libido if he didn't admit that seeing struggling, pink glowing masochist bound and leaking was making him hard as hell.
The clips were making his own nipples ache just looking at them, so those were the first things Sanada removed, then he carefully loosened the collar and set it aside. He turned off the vibration with the small chord coming out of the dildo, but left the pseudo cock in place while he pulled out the gag. Fuji coughed and sobbed, bucking slowly in need as Sanada drew him close and caressed his hair.
"Ri...ring-" Fuji choked, his arms jerking and pulling at his binds.
Sanada smirked lightly to himself as he gave a simple, "No." The tensai looked like he was ready to pass out the moment he came, and the dark eyed student had no intention of letting things end just yet. He slowly pulled out the dildo, enjoying the relieved gasp from the brunette, whose cock jabbed needily into his abs.
"It's better if it's real and warm, ahn?"
Fuji froze in surprise as Atobe slipped into the bed on his other side, spooning him from behind.
"You couldn't wait, could you?" Sanada snorted, though he sounded suspiciously pleased.
"My prowess will demonstrate the pleasure of flesh over plastic," Atobe drawled. His pants slid off in one smooth motion, and he kicked them off the side of the bed, unveiling his manhood at full mast. He pulled Fuji's ass up against his hips, and didn't hesitate as he pushed his length into the tensai's dripping, cum filled hole.
"There's - there's no way!" Fuji cried in panic as Sanada pulled his legs up and wrapped them around his waist. Already the diva was deep inside, touching the brunette's spot, making his cock ache even worse against the cock ring, and now he could feel Sanada's massive erection poking between his butt cheeks.
"N-no - please...aaaa..." His screams turned voiceless as his hole was forced open to accommodate two dicks, and fuck, Sanada had only shoved the head in but Fuji felt as if the world was being forced into him. The pressure was mind blowing and he was sure if he hadn't already died he would the moment - "AAAAH!" - they moved.
Fuji had never stretched so far, his insides had never been so full, and until that moment he would never have believed he could take so much of someone... two someones... god! Sanada had a completely different pace from Atobe, and they were both moaning louder than elephants as they pulled in and out, rubbing against each other and the tight walls of tissue. They struggled to go in as deeply as usual but a few times they were both in all the way, and it was heaven and hell for all three of them.
Fuji's throat was almost dead from screaming but he still choked out, begged them to remove the cock ring, begged them to let him come. He needed them to stop, needed them to keep going, needed them to both move, faster, slower, something, he needed less but wanted more, and when Atobe finally jerked and came, and Sanada rolled off the rubber, Fuji screamed and came so hard, he blacked out before his orgasm even finished.
His consciousness floated in and out, he felt like he could see himself on the bed, envision the two men he was pinned between, both with their bodies and their cocks, see and feel them caressing him and calling him down with gentle rubs. There were so many hands all over him and he wondered how many nights were going to end up like this, how many times they would make love to him with this extreme intensity, how long it would really last.
He could see himself whispering to Atobe, as though he were outside of his own body, "It can't last, you know that better than any of us." But the diva kissed him, eyes laughing as he asked if, at the moment, any of them really cared.
"We just want it to be this way," Sanada seemed to be saying, though Fuji was sure he was asleep now, yet he could still see and hear everything, not just what was around them, but everything they had been through, all that they had shared with each other and all that they were trying to overcome, the five of them in the future, each with his own path and own desires, still reaching, reaching for each other because they needed, because they needed one another...
Moonlight spilled onto the balcony, hiding the dimmer stars in the sky while casting a revealing glow on those watching it below. Yukimura leaned against the banister, his dark blue orbs reflecting the large token of silvery light. He shivered slightly in the midnight cold, but refused the blanket Tezuka tried to wrap around him as Seigaku's captain joined him on the terrace.
They stood silently for quite some time, enjoying the nighttime quiet slashed by the yells and moans from the room. Once the noise tapered down, they settled serenely into the cool darkness, each lost in meditation.
Ironically, the stoic brunette broke the tacit still, murmuring, "Thank you."
Yukimura turned to him with a raised brow. "For what?"
"This."
Tezuka stared towards the moon, his glasses glinting in the light, making him difficult to read. The bluenette sighed internally, remembering the little trick Fuji had taught him, about imagining what the bespectacled spartan wanted to say.
Thank you for this. For whatever this is. I'm not sure if it's right, and I don't trust that it can truly work out all the way to the end. But I know that for now, this... all of us together, can heal him...
Maybe it was right. Yukimura felt that, just a little, he was beginning to understand.
"You knew I still loved with him," Tezuka added quietly.
The bluenette shook his head. "I knew he was still in love with you, and that's all that mattered."
"Ah," nodded the other.
Yukimura had been watching him closely, his controlled exterior that never really broke, not even when he was angry or during sex. Even now, though he had supposedly lost, now that he had accepted this new path of fate, Tezuka stood without hesitation, his eyes stable and looking forward.
"Why are you always so confident?"
"Because the future will come, whether we go to it or not."
No matter the direction, there was commitment. This was the man who was always winning, even when he lost.
"I see..." Yukimura sighed, wishing for some of that ability for renewal to be his. He took the blanket from Tezuka's arms and draped it over his head and shoulders, hiding all but his eyes within the warm fibers.
They would heal him, too. They would all heal together.
Tezuka's fingers brushed his hand, and they returned inside to join the others on the bed.
A/N: This is the longest fic I've ever written, not only in chapters and word count but also in time. I am so happy to come to this point, and also honored by the love and reception it's received. I don't know if any of the original readers who reviewed back in 2007 are still around, but all of you who reviewed have encouraged me so deeply to finish this, no matter what.
The plot never really changed, other than small details in the character development, but everything more or less went as planned from beginning to end. I'll admit, I didn't really have much planned at chapter 1, but a few chapters in the whole plot was mapped out. There's still a number of plot holes that never got fixed (even when the story moved to ff dot net -sweatdrop-), so please forgive me nee?
Though it's presumptuous to do a self-analysis, I do want to make a point about the pairings. This fic was, truly, TezuFuji, SanaYuki, and OT1 (because Atobe's one true pairing is with himself - who else could he love more?). The five of them are in a deep friendship with quite a few benefits, but they aren't all in love with each other. They love each other, or will at least come to love each other, yes, but the kind of love that lovers share... is broken down into the pairings. Still, their swinging's meant to last a lifetime. At least, that's what they hope for at the moment...
I never got into Atobe's backstory, and will try to push it into an omake. Yup, next up is the omake series! ...that I'll write someday. In summary, the omake series is just the little parts that never made it into the main story line. ^_^;
Now other than that, this story is finally, finally at it's close. It's been so many years... -cry- But I already have another (thankfully much shorter) fanfiction ready to go (and many others, I'm sure - my muses will never leave me alone). Please keep reading and reviewing, onegaishimasu! Half of my writing is to entertain myself, and the other half is for all of you.
Love,
lemon & chai
P.S. Neumegami has made another lovely fanart: i61. photobucket(dot com)/ albums/h44/neumegami/TeFu%20Prince/OT5_exotic .jpg -blush-
