Title: Gundam Diaries Part 28 ~ Wufei

Author: Makoto Sagara

Archives: www.afallenangel.net/makotosagara/frames/fanfiction.html, www.sailorsandco.crosswinds.net/gundamwing/fanfiction/fanfiction.html,

www.wufeiduo.net, www.fanfiction.net, www.foreverfandom.net, www.geocities.com/daqdaqduck/

Category: Romance, Angst

Pairings: 5x2x5, 3x4, 1+2, R+1

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Shonen ai, language, OOC, angst

Disclaimers: No, I don't own Mobile Suit Gundam Wing. If I did, I'd be rich, Japanese, and not stuck in the States when I want to travel. Um, sue me if you want; you can have my Canadian pennies. Any and all flames will be used to warm my hands upon and to keep me comfortable while I write the next chapter.

A/N: Yes, this is the second short chapter in a row. Expect the next 6 or so more to be just as short. I have to move the time up so I can get to the fun part. *gigglz* Please review, ok? You'll make my muses happy, and that keeps them giving me ideas to write. Read Maybe Angels too! You'll like it! I promise!

Dedication: To Stacy, because you are my little cutie pie, and I can. Love you, sugar!

Symbols: *blah* emphasized thought

*~*~* Major change of scene

*~~~* Minor change of scene

April 21st, AC 195... 01:25:34

Duo is gone. I am here on Peacemillion in my own room, staring at the walls and wondering what O is doing that I have no mission to accomplish. I feel that I will go insane, even though Duo has not been gone that long. He only left approximately four hours ago, and yet, I am totally out of things to do.

I have been accepted into the rather large 'family' of the Sweepers. They seemed to think that this was an important thing to share, and to be honest, I was very flattered. Duo smiled and teased me the whole time, and for the first time, I didn't mind that we were around the others when he did so. He has changed me in this short amount of time, and to be perfectly honest, I feel that it may be for the good and the bad.

I still hope to accomplish my mission for the sake of Justice. I will do all things with honour and dignity. I am still myself, whether I be worthy of Duo, or unworthy of his love as I was with Nataku's elevated opinion. Who do I think I am fooling? She thought I was weak because I preferred to spend my time with my books and other things than to actively play a role in this unjust war. Perhaps she was correct, but I have found another thing to fight for, besides just her memory.

That is something that worries me as well. I have let my barrier down, allowed Maxwell into my life and heart fully, and I am totally lost. I am worried that something bad may happen to either one of us now. I am trying to be more careful with what I do now. I have more than just myself in the world.

Interesting change of topics, isn't it? I did not mean to get this in depth about how I felt about my relationship with Duo. And yet, I do not regret it. It seems the more I think about it, the more I feel that I will be able to see the end of this war with my mind intact, if nothing else. I would hope to have more than just that, but only an optimistic fool would wish for that. I am neither an optimist, nor a fool. I know that something may happen that could break everything I have built with Duo up.

I have veered far too far into this direction, and realistically speaking, I am starting to remember some things of my past a bit too vividly. I will stop now. Tsao![1} This is what happens when I am left a bit too much time to think, and not enough events to actually detail. Until he left, I was fine.

I am thinking and writing in circles. I feel that I have nothing else of importance on this matter to talk about, so I will move on with other business.

Duo and I have added a few improvements upon Yuy's near-perfect plan. Those, and the improvements made by Barton and Winner with Yuy will allow us all time to confront that... weak girl for her actions. I have very little to say to her, but I will let Duo say whatever he wishes. He has that right, seeing as how it was he that she was after. I was just a... distraction, I suppose, for her opponent.

I must scoff at that word. Relena Peacecraft is no match, in any way, shape, or form, for Duo. I suppose if Yuy hadn't been such a fuck up, to quote Duo, he would have what he wants, but as things stand, he does not. And I do. I'm not sure if I am any more deserving than he, but that is beyond the point.

I am very confident that our plan should go without too many mitigating factors. That xi ai is far too predictable, and Catalonia is almost as bad. She has some sort of grudge against Winner, and will see this as an invitation to finish their last confrontation. Winner is perhaps looking forward to that as much as he is to his talk with Peacecraft. The time is almost nigh, and the winds seem to be changing. I can only hope, as weak as it sounds, that the change is in our favor, and innocents will not suffer and/or die in this useless excuse for a war.

It is now far past the time for me to retire. I will now go and obtain some rest. That may be why I am rambling much like Maxwell does.

Good evening,

~ Chang Wufei

Notes:

[1} Tsao - Mandarin, "Fuck!"