Title: Gundam Diaries Part 28 ~ Wufei
Author: Makoto Sagara
Archives: www.afallenangel.net/makotosagara/frames/fanfiction.html, www.sailorsandco.crosswinds.net/gundamwing/fanfiction/fanfiction.html,
www.wufeiduo.net, www.fanfiction.net, www.foreverfandom.net, www.geocities.com/daqdaqduck/
Category: Romance, Angst
Pairings: 5x2x5, 3x4, 1+2, R+1
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Shonen ai, language, OOC, angst
Disclaimers: No, I don't own Mobile Suit Gundam Wing. If I did, I'd be rich, Japanese, and not stuck in the States when I want to travel. Um, sue me if you want; you can have my Canadian pennies. Any and all flames will be used to warm my hands upon and to keep me comfortable while I write the next chapter.
A/N: Yes, this is the second short chapter in a row. Expect the next 6 or so more to be just as short. I have to move the time up so I can get to the fun part. *gigglz* Please review, ok? You'll make my muses happy, and that keeps them giving me ideas to write. Read Maybe Angels too! You'll like it! I promise!
Dedication: To Stacy, because you are my little cutie pie, and I can. Love you, sugar!
Symbols: *blah* emphasized thought
*~*~* Major change of scene
*~~~* Minor change of scene
April 21st, AC 195... 01:25:34
Duo is gone. I am here on Peacemillion in my own room, staring at the walls and wondering what O is doing that I have no mission to accomplish. I feel that I will go insane, even though Duo has not been gone that long. He only left approximately four hours ago, and yet, I am totally out of things to do.
I have been accepted into the rather large 'family' of the Sweepers. They seemed to think that this was an important thing to share, and to be honest, I was very flattered. Duo smiled and teased me the whole time, and for the first time, I didn't mind that we were around the others when he did so. He has changed me in this short amount of time, and to be perfectly honest, I feel that it may be for the good and the bad.
I still hope to accomplish my mission for the sake of Justice. I will do all things with honour and dignity. I am still myself, whether I be worthy of Duo, or unworthy of his love as I was with Nataku's elevated opinion. Who do I think I am fooling? She thought I was weak because I preferred to spend my time with my books and other things than to actively play a role in this unjust war. Perhaps she was correct, but I have found another thing to fight for, besides just her memory.
That is something that worries me as well. I have let my barrier down, allowed Maxwell into my life and heart fully, and I am totally lost. I am worried that something bad may happen to either one of us now. I am trying to be more careful with what I do now. I have more than just myself in the world.
Interesting change of topics, isn't it? I did not mean to get this in depth about how I felt about my relationship with Duo. And yet, I do not regret it. It seems the more I think about it, the more I feel that I will be able to see the end of this war with my mind intact, if nothing else. I would hope to have more than just that, but only an optimistic fool would wish for that. I am neither an optimist, nor a fool. I know that something may happen that could break everything I have built with Duo up.
I have veered far too far into this direction, and realistically speaking, I am starting to remember some things of my past a bit too vividly. I will stop now. Tsao