~*~ Chapter Twenty-Eight: Moonlit December ~*~
Christmas was in two weeks. Carlisle was looking forward to it, much more than he had been just ten days ago. Bella was home again. She'd returned with him to the house the very night she'd waited for him outside the hospital. Everyone had been happy to see her; there'd been more hugs and tears. She'd stayed, falling asleep in his arms.
Bella had class the following morning, and he later learned that she'd made a point to catch up with her boyfriend while at the college. That afternoon Matt had come with her to the house. As much as Carlisle wanted Bella to come home again, he hoped Matt wasn't hurt over the decision. Bella living with Matt hadn't been a romantic decision, so much as escapism - and Carlisle was sure that after Ramesh's death, Matt had needed her there.
Carlisle had watched from the living room as Matt carried a box of her things up the stairs. There wasn't actually much to return to the house; most of Bella's things were still there —a fact that had given Carlisle hope over the last three months. It was in Matt's shoulders that Carlisle could see how he was feeling. Matt was disappointed but resigned. He wasn't unhappy, though, as Matt's tension eased whenever Bella touched him, and especially when she had kissed his cheek.
Bella and Matt had been together for two years, and Carlisle wondered where their relationship would go from here. Mutual grief tended to bring couples closer, and whatever the circumstances, they had just spent three months living together. Their attachment was still evident, but how often did romantic couples survive cohabiting and then moving apart? Carlisle wasn't insensitive to how Bella moving out — returning home — might feel to Matt. So he had watched; Matt was a good soul, and Carlisle didn't want him feeling too low.
All the same, Carlisle knew that Bella belonged right where she was: back in his house.
It was already late into the night, and the sun had taken with it what lingering warmth it provided in the day. All around him during the back road drive through Middlebury, homes were turning up the heat. Bright moonlight hit the pale gray smoke that billowed out from chimneys, and the nearby air became permeated with the sweet smell of burning wood.
The scent tickled Carlisle's nose and made him smile as he made his way home. Bella would enjoy the smell, Carlisle thought. Perhaps for Christmas we'll get the fireplace going. Normally his home would not have needed to be heated during the winter, but in the years since Bella had lived with them it was a minor bill to ensure her physical comfort. The last few months during Bella's absence he'd kept the heat on, always hoping that she'd return.
Carlisle was unbelievably happy. His home hadn't felt complete while she had been gone. Now every night he could look forward to coming home to her. She ate in his kitchen again, curled up on the couch in the living room again, chatted with him in his office again. Yet, it wasn't quite the same as it had been before. She still laughed and smiled, and each occurrence warmed his heart. In quiet moments, however, there was a certain wisdom and maturity in her eyes that hadn't been there. When he looked into them he felt both excited and at peace. He could look into her eyes all day; he was just that happy to have her home again.
Carlisle sang along with Bing Crosby on the radio until he had to turn it off. The house was decorated with holly and ivy twined around every pole and accenting every corner. White lights offset the dark green and red. This was mainly Alice and Esme's doing. Alice's spirit for celebration and Esme's caring heart had always led to festive décor around Christmastime.
Carlisle smiled at his family when he entered. They were all in the living room, surrounding the coffee table and the mound of flour on it. The sight made Carlisle pause, until he realized that they were playing a very old-fashioned Christmas game. The three ladies were sitting on the floor, while Jasper was on the couch, Alice leaning against his knees. Esme was taking her turn, carefully slicing a bit out of the firmly packed dome of flour, not disturbing the ring resting on top.
"Flour pudding?" Carlisle asked them.
Alice grinned at him. "It's all the more fun if you're a vampire." Carlisle shook his head fondly at his family. The person who made the ring fall with their slice would have the penalty of fetching it out with their teeth, therefore the phrase "eat dirt" could be used literally with the Cullens. As they were each able to calculate the mass and density with a single look, flour pudding also became a game of wit, accuracy and restrained strength.
"Bella sound asleep?" he asked the room. Jasper nodded at him. Carlisle started to make his way up the stairs, eager to actualize the idea that had occurred to him on the way home.
"Your timing is going to work out perfectly, by the way," Alice called out to him.
Carlisle's smile encompassed the entire room before he went up. The moment he was out of sight Esme raised her eyebrows hopefully at Alice, who winked back. Maggie grinned.
Upstairs, Bella turned over and smiled sleepily at Carlisle when she felt his weight press down beside her. He'd come to wake her. It was a return to their old tradition, and it made Bella feel warm and happy. Over the last week, she'd found herself talking with Carlisle about anything and everything. If she brought up her Latin courses, he would discuss Livy with her. In a more serious moment she mentioned how her grief had made her intensely aware of the foliage in October. Carlisle gave comfort and support, and then their conversation flowed into making comparisons of what her eyes and his eyes could see in the leaves. Lighter times had them both making each other laugh. It was so good to have him back in her life again, and to be back in his. "Hey."
"Hello," Carlisle answered just as gently. He sat on the edge of the bed, his hand resting on the covers over Bella's hip. She could see him clearly in the moonlight that came in through the window. Bella couldn't explain why, but she really liked the way scarves looked on Carlisle.
"Late night?" Bella lifted herself up onto her elbow, blinking sleep out of her eyes.
"Yes. Thankfully a quiet one." Carlisle smiled at her, still keeping his voice at a murmur. "Did you sleep well?"
"Thus far," Bella answered, her mouth curving up in a tease. Her bedroom clock revealed it to be nearly two in the morning.
Carlisle's hand shifted from her hip to grasp her free hand. "If you don't mind, I'd like it if you got up for a little while. I have something to share with you I think you'll enjoy."
"Really?" With the teasing grin still on her face, she flopped backwards, allowing herself to fall abruptly back onto her pillow. "But I'm comfortable here. It's so warm and cozy under the covers." Holding the blankets and comforter to her, Bella made as though she was settling in, wriggling her hips into the warmth and earning a chuckle from Carlisle.
Leaning forward, Carlisle kissed the tip of her nose. "It's Christmas, Bella. Indulge me."
He was gone from the room before she could respond, knowing she would shortly join him downstairs. Bella almost wanted to protest after him that he was assuming too much, but who would she have been kidding? Since moving back she had not once passed up a chance to spend time with Carlisle. Besides, it wasn't as if she had classes in the morning. Christmas vacation had officially begun that afternoon, when Bella completed her last final. Matt had departed the day before, off to be with his family. He'd been perfectly understanding about her wanting to spend Christmas with the Cullens; in fact, he'd seemed to have expected it.
Missing the warmth of the bed, Bella dressed in layers before going downstairs. She was glad she had, because when she reached the hall, she found Carlisle waiting with her winter coat in his hand.
"We're going outside?" she asked, and her whine was very pitiable. Alice and Jasper laughed as Bella begrudgingly slipped on the coat. With no need to confirm the obvious, Carlisle settled her wool cap over her head, lowering it to cover her eyes. "Hey!"
"Keep your eyes covered, Bella. It'll be worth it," Alice told her.
"It's true," Maggie said pertly and Bella could picture her curly red hair bouncing about as she nodded her head.
"Fine," Bella said grudgingly, which was in complete contrast to the wave of anticipation moving through her. Once Bella was fully bundled she and Carlisle went out the door.
"Have fun!" Alice called after them, smirking. She turned back to the game to discover the ring falling above her knife. "Son of a-"
The peals of laughter in the living room were the last sounds Bella heard before Carlisle swept her onto his back and they were off running. She held on tight, not wanting her grip to slip and cause her to fall off his back. The cold hit her cheeks and she pressed her face against him. Her scarf protected the back of her neck, even as its fringes danced behind her from the speed of their passage.
Bella had a sense of the proximity of trees, and then she could feel open space around them. Carlisle would have to be moving fast out in the open in order to avoid being seen. She tried to figure out which direction they were heading in, and felt the presence of trees again. She gave up, and just let herself trust in Carlisle.
It was both odd and familiar to be on Carlisle's back. With the return of their camaraderie had come the constant need to touch. If they'd relaxed against each other or cuddled before, they were doing it twice as often now. A handhold when one of them came into the same room, a cuddle on the couch in the living room while talking with the others. Whenever Carlisle's hand slipped into hers it was a reassurance that everything was all right between them again, and the solid form of Carlisle near her was a constant comfort and support. As was his scent. Her nose pressed against the back of his neck, Bella breathed in the aroma of cider, nighttime and books.
After several minutes, Carlisle came to a stop and slowly lowered her to the ground. Once she regained some feeling in her legs, Bella pushed her hat back on her head, uncovering her eyes. Before them was a long, narrow stretch of exposed ground, a smooth canvas of untrodden snow that glistened where the bright moonlight hit it. The trees and evergreens surrounding were laced with a delicate layer of white. Even as Bella looked, a soft snow began to fall.
"Oh!" Bella said, moved. It was incredible to see snow falling while the moon was out. The clouds were sporadically positioned in the sky, allowing for the moon to shine. It was not unlike late spring when the sun is shining and there's a sudden rainsquall. This must be the winter moonlight equivalent. It was rather magical.
"Alice was right, I seemed to have timed the weather perfectly," Carlisle said from beside her with a surprised laugh. The night's light cast a muted silver glow over his golden hair and porcelain features. "I thought to take you here when I noticed how bright the moon was on my way home tonight."
"It's beautiful. And peaceful."
"Yes, it is, isn't it? Consider this my first Christmas gift to you."
"First?" Bella laughed. "But you are right, this is a gift." She leaned into him, relaxing as she gazed out over the moonlit winter landscape. Carlisle wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Comfortable with how well Carlisle understood her, Bella allowed herself the contentment she drew from the surrounding scene.
The stillness was beautiful. The moon was so bright that it felt less like the middle of the night and more like twilight. As Bella's eyes adjusted, she could pick out individual branches on an evergreen clear across the cottony field.
"Christmas came upon us so quickly this year," Bella said after a moment.
"Yes. Edward and Rosalie will be arriving tomorrow."
"It'll be good to see them again."
Neither of them mentioned why it had been so long since Bella had seen them. Bella couldn't help but reflect that it was her own fault. She shouldn't have let the murkiness keep her down so long. Bella smiled when she felt a reassuring squeeze on her shoulder and the tightening of Carlisle's arm, and she ceased the mental self-flagellation. Grateful, she tilted her head against him. They remained quiet, enjoying the serenity when the loud crack of a falling tree branch made Bella jump.
"Probably a branch that couldn't take much more weight from the snow," Carlisle explained with amusement coloring his voice.
"Mmm-hmm." She had reached the same conclusion herself. Bella turned to look at Carlisle and laughed at the sight of him. "Look who's talking!"
Unlike Bella, there was no warmth coming off Carlisle to make the flakes melt. His head and shoulders were collecting snow. Laughingly, Bella brushed him off. "Judging by you, I can measure that we've already received about a quarter of an inch."
"Cute," Carlisle retorted, brushing off his other shoulder.
Bella merely grinned and looked back at her surroundings. She closed her eyes, breathing in deep before letting out a contented sigh. It felt good, and with Carlisle by her side, it was easy to simply give herself over to the joy of the season.
The sudden grin on her face did not go unnoticed by Carlisle. "Care to share your thoughts?"
"I'm remembering a Christmas I spent in Forks visiting my father. He'd put a big red bow on this pine tree beside the driveway. It looked awkward, until we got a light dusting of snow. Then it was beautiful." Bella opened her eyes and smiled at Carlisle. "Being here right now makes me feel . . . I don't know, young again. Well, younger," she modified. "It's like something inside me remembers a sort of happiness and purity. And my mind associates it with Christmas, though that's not it entirely."
Bella gave a self-conscious laugh. "Listen to me. You're probably the only person in the world I'd feel comfortable talking like this in front of."
Carlisle smiled at her somewhat ruefully. "You know, I envy you a little."
"What? Why?" Bella looked at him with wide eyes.
"You were able to grow up at a time when, culturally, Christmas had taken on the best possible meaning."
"'A big commercial racket'?" Bella quoted the cartoon classic with half-seriousness.
Carlisle tweaked a lock of her brown hair. "I just listened to you wax sentimental, Bella. Can't I respond without you teasing?"
"Sorry," Bella answered fairly, and brushed Carlisle off a little more. The tips of her fingers were beginning to chill under the Thinsulate gloves.
"I was seven years old when Christmas became banned in England. Prior to that it was a time of drunken revelry, sporting, hedonistic eating and masque balls. I was changed only a couple of years after the ban was lifted, maybe three."
Bella listened with rapt attention. She'd known that traditions changed over time; it was only natural. Somehow, though, it had never occurred to her before that Carlisle was witness to the evolution. Bella felt a little tug inside her. There was so much about this man that she just hadn't opened her eyes to, so much more that she wanted to get to know.
"I wasn't exactly focused on cultural holidays those first years, but celebrations did seem to fall to the wayside. I had been a vampire for over 160 years when perceptions and meanings around Christmas began to change. It became more centered on not only Christ's birth, but Christ's teaching as well. It became about good will and compassion. And family."
Carlisle paused briefly, still twirling her hair in his fingers. "I already held strong to the values of good will and compassion. It was another hundred years before I had a family."
"Christmas must mean a lot to you." Bella took in his appearance, from his moonlit blond hair to his whiskey eyes and pale face. She was seeing yet another layer of him that she never suspected was there.
"It does mean very much to me. It also makes me thankful that I have so many people I care about in my life." He smiled at her. "That missing element that you couldn't describe a minute ago, Bella, is caring. Family, goodwill, compassion: Christmas is love." Carlisle let go of her hair. The lock fell back to her shoulder, and Carlisle lightly stroked the part of her coat where it rested.
Love. Bella smiled as a new memory came to her. "I think that's what Charlie believes. He doesn't talk about things like that, but I know. Once he mailed a fairly ugly Christmas card to Phoenix. It had a poorly drawn Santa flying solo above a bunch of homes. The colors were garish, and even Mom didn't like it. Being the thoughtless kid I was, I asked him why he chose such an ugly card.
"'Because it says Christmas is love, Bella,' he answered me. I looked at the card again and noticed that the Santa was dropping little hearts across the town."
Carlisle smiled at her. "That's a nice story about Chief Swan. Though it's hard to imagine you as being thoughtless and unobservant, Bella."
Bella shrugged slightly. "I was about eight at the time. Cut me some slack for youth, Carlisle."
Carlisle chuckled softly, and then his hand grasped hers. "Look."
Bella looked where Carlisle pointed. At first she didn't notice a thing, but after a second she saw it. A large bird flew over the trees to their left. As it soared back and forth Bella thought she caught a flash of white.
"Is that a bald eagle?"
Carlisle nodded.
"Wow, I didn't know that there were bald eagles in Vermont."
"There usually aren't."
Her eyes remained on the majestic bird until it was out of sight. The moon was dominant in the sky again. The clearing took on a blue-white hue and had a soft, quilt-like appearance. The awe, the beauty, the magic of it all caused Bella's emotions to swell. Giddy with it, she laughed. "I have this urge to run out into the middle of the field and make a big snow angel, but I hate to ruin it with my footprints."
Carlisle laughed, pleased to see the happy excitement beaming off her face. "Are you asking me to run you out there?"
"Actually, I hadn't thought of that, but would you? Please?"
Carlisle's mouth quirked up at the corner and he feigned a stern tone. "Technically, Bella, I shouldn't. Leaving a mysterious imprint in the middle of the field would hardly help staying under the radar."
"Then don't. Just drop me, and I'll make the imprint." Her logic was flawed, but that wasn't the point. Mischievous, she grabbed the front of Carlisle's coat and hoisted her legs up sideways. Carlisle had no choice but to catch her. "It's Christmas, Carlisle. Indulge me."
Shaking his head, causing the last of the light flakes to fall off of it, Carlisle held Bella closer to him as he lightly sprung out into the field. "Have I ever said no to you?"
And he dropped her.
Alone, Bella landed with a soft crunch of impressed snow. Grinning madly, she spread-eagled her arms and legs, back and forth. "I haven't done this in years!"
"Then I'd say it was about time." Carlisle returned to the spot that he'd dropped her and swept her up again, leaving no immediate print behind in his speed, though a footfall or two could be detected about seventeen feet away. "Can you see it behind us?"
"No," Bella sighed. "Thanks, though. I wasn't quite done, however."
"In that case…" Carlisle engaged in his own mischief. Bella suddenly found herself on her back, dropped so that she landed within the older layers underneath the recent fall. Snow rose around her on all sides and she sputtered.
"Use a little less strength next time, huh?" She playfully tossed a handful of flakes at him as she tried to push herself up. When Carlisle offered his hand to help, she put her own in his — then gave it a little tug, knowing she couldn't possibly cause him to lose his balance. Yet Carlisle allowed it, and fell beside her, laughing as she shrieked and turned her head away from the upward spray. Eyes shining, Bella faced Carlisle again.
And their lips met.
Who moved first, neither one was certain. It was unexpected for both of them, a moment neither had planned nor even considered before. A kiss was simply the most natural thing to do, and they both did it without thinking. And still not thinking, neither stopped.
Somehow Carlisle was no longer beside Bella, but above her. Their bodies pressed together as their lips continued to touch, never breaking contact. Bella's mouth opened: a soft giving, and then pressed against his: a gentle taking, exploring the smooth coolness. Carlisle tasted her lips, taking in their warmth and sweetness. Gently, softly, going in for more.
A southeasterly wind picked up, blowing loose snow in a swirl. It flew up from the ground, curving around the evergreens, then down again toward the almost immaculate blanket of snow. Light from the full moon brightened the joyfully dancing flakes, even as it shone down to give light to the couple that, for once, were oblivious to all but themselves.
Bella needed to breathe, and she inhaled deeply, bringing reality back into the moment. Their mouths separated and, still close, they simply looked at each other, amazed. Bella lay underneath Carlisle, her face just a breadth away from his. It would take only the slightest movement from either one of them, and they would be kissing again.
"Carlisle?" Her breath flowed over his lips.
"Yes?"
Her heart was pounding.
"I'm cold."
Carlisle blinked in surprise, and she laughed. A returned awareness of their surroundings made it easy to see why she'd blurted out those words. The temperature was decidedly below freezing and Bella had snow beneath her, on either side of her, and a vampire on top of her. Carlisle was quickly upright and pulling her to her feet. He helped to brush her off — both of them purely business — and without any words they were on their way, leaving the clearing behind them.
Though neither had spoken, Carlisle and Bella were both having the same awakening thought:
I think I've wanted that for a long time.
A/N: Please Read
For those who are not aware, "Moonlit" is actually the backstory to a Christmas one-shot I wrote in December 2009 called "Moonlit December." Hastily written and meant to reflect that Christmas is about love, it depicts a little Christmas magic helping two friends suddenly realize that there's something more there. I have done my best to remain true to this little one-shot as I wrote "Moonlit," including the incredibly binding line "a moment neither one of them had planned or even thought of before."
"Moonlit" is far more involved, and therefore has evolved beyond the one-shot. While the dialogue remains the same, I've taken the liberty to expand on the narration as I fit the o/s into "Moonlit" as a chapter. God help me, I hope I did a decent job.
This chapter has a banner, made on request by AllTheOtherNamesAreUsed (talk about beta extraordinaire). Follow this link: stormdragonfly . blogspot 2012 / 02 / banner-for-moonlit-december-by . html
Many thanks to all of you for your support of me, and this story!
Next Chapter… I bet you can guess ;)
