Next chapter is up! It took me longer than expected to get this one out, so much work!

Also, I enjoy seeing reviews that mention that the readers forget that Ed is a girl :P It means, A) that Ed's personality is still on point with the male version (yay!) and that B) it shows that whether a person is a girl or a guy, they can still kickass like Ed does!

Enjoy!


February 2nd, 1944

I was sitting on my bed, leaning against the so-called pillow and wall. We had returned to London last night after the successful mission in Czechoslovakia. Since then, I had somewhat slept, the adrenaline of the mission and stress of the plane ride back finally wearing off.

However, I hadn't slept that long.

It was early morning, early enough that it was still dark outside but I was wide awake.

I couldn't sleep, not when I could study the transmutation circle Edward had given me. The paper lay unfolded over my own notebook. It was already getting well-worn with how much I've handled it so far. There was even a tear at the bottom of the page but that was entirely intentional: Edward had written an address in Washington on it and I figured it was his. I memorized it, tore that part of the paper off, and burned it.

His warning was still fresh in my mind and I didn't want to involve him and his family by accident if someone managed to find this paper.

Though, I couldn't focus on that now. I needed to study the transmutation itself. The one I've been staring at it for the past forty minutes without much success in deciphering it.

I couldn't believe how complex it was. Every time I thought I understood a section and the use of a symbol, something contradicted it and I had to rethink the entire process.

This was not going to be easy.

I needed to start off by deciphering this circle, to understand exactly how it worked before I could even think of modifying it so that a human sacrifice was not necessary. I basically needed to perform the steps of alchemy but with a circle.

Understand. Deconstruct. Reconstruct.

I just needed to do the understanding part without the help of alchemic books. Maybe the books I had seen on Nordic ruins could offer some answers. Some symbols had been similar so perhaps there meaning would be as well.

I hope.

I'd have to double check before venturing too far down that road.

I breathed deeply, readjusting myself and going back to the section that –

I jumped at the knock at my door. Who the…? I searched the room for the small clock and saw it was barely five forty five in the morning.

"Ed? Are you up?" whispered a voice on the other side of the door and I breathed a little easier.

"Yeah, give me a second, Steve."

I shut my notebook and stood. I went to where my coat was hanging and stuffed the notebook into one of its pocket. It had been one of the reasons I chose that notebook in particular: I could easily hide it, even without a bag. It helped that men's clothing offered large pockets: I could even hide it on me!

Not that anyone would be able to decipher whatever notes I've taken anyway: they were in German and coded. If Al hadn't been able to decipher parts, no one here was going to either; especially when the coded elements were alchemic terms that they didn't exactly use.

I headed towards the door, unlocking it and opening it. Steve smiled at me from the other side, dressed for the day and with a coat on. "Morning! Did you sleep well?"

I shrugged. "Well enough. What are you doing up so early?"

"I could ask you the same thing," he replied with a chuckle. He had a point. I was doing… research. I guess you can call it that. Steve on the other hand... "I was passing by and saw the light under the door," he explained. "I figured, since we're both awake, we could get back to training. If you're up to it, of course."

True, I had agreed to that. It wouldn't be a bad idea, actually. Sometimes I thought better as I moved, especially considering I still had some lingering cramps. Maybe training with Steve will help solve some trickier symbols and sections as well as stretch those damn muscles.

"Sure, but we're not using a punching bag this time," I said as I headed back into to my room.

I heard Steve follow me inside as he voiced in confusion. "Then what are we going to do?"

"Spar."

Steve eyes widened. "You and me? Ed –"

"First of all, you can't use a punching bag forever. That and the tab you keep accumulating at the bar is enough money spent without replacing each bag you break."

Steve sighed, waving that reason off as he continued, insistent. "Money shouldn't be the issue. You –"

"Also, I haven't had a good spar in over a year and, as you mentioned, I could be rusty."

I thought it would get at least a smile out of Steve but he just continued to stare at me, unsure. "Ed, I might hurt you," he finally murmured.

Oh… I smirked, trying to reassure him. "You won't. And you can only possibly hurt me if you manage to actually get a hit in."

Steve was silent for a moment longer before reluctantly nodding. "Fine, but we're starting off easy, to test it out. If I do hurt you, it is over, we're not trying again."

I nearly rolled my eyes but I nodded instead as I walked back towards Steve. "You do remember though…" I didn't finish that sentence. Instead, I lifted my right arm in front of him, waving it slightly.

Steve gave me a look, grabbing my wrist and lowering it away from his face. "Yes, but since you're unwilling to share that with anyone else, no one will be able to fix it if I break it."

"You underestimate the strength of the metal."

"And you're underestimating my strength."

I pulled my arm back, smirking as I bypassed Steve and left the room, shrugging on my coat as I did. "One way to test it out! Let's go!"

I made sure to lock the door behind us and then followed Steve down the corridor.


It had taken a while but we finally found a gym that opened ridiculously early. We were the only ones there so we took advantage of the –

"The what ring?" I asked. I don't think I heard properly because it did not look like a box nor a ring for that matter…

"Boxing ring," repeated Steve, taking off his coat and placing it on a nearby chair. "It's where people box." I blinked, confused. "Fight with just their fists."

To that I frowned. "Just their fists? But what about their legs? Kicks? Their knees? They can do so much more than just punch someone!"

Steve chuckled as he climbed into the ring. "I don't disagree with you, Ed. And that's what I want to practice."

"Good." I shrugged off my coat, placing it with Steve's and following him into the ring. As I stretched out my limbs, I noticed that the floor was slightly matted, giving me a bit more boost than I normally had. This should be fun. Once I finished stretching, I eyed Steve. "Ready to not hit me?" I slid into my fighting stance as I said that, a smirk playing at my lips.

Steve stepped into his stance but he looked more worried than ready. "Remember our deal, Ed."

"Yeah, yeah, I remember but I also remember saying you wouldn't be able to get a hit in. Want to prove me wrong?"

Steve sighed but still stepped closer.

And he completely missed me with his so-called punch as I moved aside easily. Maybe this is how Teacher felt when she took on both Al and myself while reading. If we were as slow as Steve was at the moment, I too would be reading.

"Yeah, not going to hit me any time soon," I remarked as I rounded a kick at him, nailing him square on the shoulder. At least I held back on the strength of the kick and I used my right leg. "Good luck."

Steve stumbled back in surprise but he quickly recovered, getting back into position. "I cannot underestimate you, Ed. I should know that by now."

"Damn straight." I motioned for him to try again. "And you're also taking on someone who is used to fighting against bigger opponents. You're at a disadvantage."

Steve was trying to hide a smile. "You just called yourself –"

"I didn't," I cut in quickly, frowning. I didn't want to hear him say that dreaded word. "You're ridiculously tall. I've fought against other ridiculously tall people. I'm not… Not… You know." Steve was really trying to stop himself from smiling from what I could tell and I scowled. "Yeah, have your laugh but you still won't be able to get a hit in and I'll take that as a win."

He did let a chuckle out and I frowned. Fine, he thinks he can laugh at this. I ran towards him, ducking under his messy punch and spun around him, knocking his back with my elbow as I did. That got him to quickly refocus on the sparring. We continued for fifteen minutes in silence, Steve's smile disappearing completely after the first three minutes. He was now fully concentrated on the fighting, at trying to catch me off guard. That wasn't going to happen but I was pleasantly surprised to see that he was getting closer to landing a hit as time progressed.

During the fifteen minutes, I was getting more used to the fighting area and even used it to my advantage. Just as I moved back from a kick Steve sent my way, I used my momentum to flip backwards, sending my own kick as I did.

Well, neither kick landed but I'll still take that as point for me because Steve still hadn't got a hit in.

"Hey, Ed?"

I ducked a punch, circling around Steve quickly to squat and try to trip him. No success. "Yeah?"

"Why didn't you go with your uncles in Prague?" he asked as whirled around, trying another kick. "Not that I'm complaining that you're still on the team," he added quickly as I ducked again to which he followed with another lower kick, faster than I expected. I rolled away, standing and getting back into my fighting stance. "I just felt there was more to that explanation but, honestly, I didn't want to push it."

I backed away, holding up my hands as I took a breather as well as a moment to come up with a plausible explanation that Steve would be alright hearing. Steve relaxed, placing his hands on his hips as he breathed deeply.

"Well, do you at least believe that I do want to help you get rid of Hydra?" I began. I had gotten too invested now to stop. I couldn't just turn my back on the team nor on the soldiers that Hydra captures to use as worker slaves in their factories.

He nodded. "But that's not the only reason, is it?"

Sometimes I hated how well Steve knew me…

I sighed, crossing my arms as I tried to formulate an answer, one that would be the trust but was still not the full truth. "I'm trying to find my brother, Steve. I can't do that in America. Besides, I – I don't know where I'd want to stay once this war is over… E-Russel and Fletcher made up their minds in staying in the USA. I don't need to be there, reminding of what they left or of possibly moving somewhere else."

Steve nodded slowly and I hope he took the explanation well. What I told him was the truth – parts of a bigger truth – but I didn't lie to him. I didn't like lying to him anymore than I already have…

And thankfully I caught myself before calling Edward by his real name… That would never have flown.

"Makes sense," agreed Steve finally and I felt my shoulders sag slightly in relief.

"And I'm nothing but trouble anyway. They don't need that," I added with a smirk to try and lighten the mood. It did get Steve to crack a smile but I sensed something else was bugging him from the look on his face. Damn… If he was getting to know me, the same can be said about me knowing him. "Is something else bothering you?" I asked slowly.

Steve breathed deeply and I waited until he finally said, "Bucky, I'm worried about him."

Oh. I had not been expecting that topic. "What happened?"

"He… It may sound weird but… He isn't the same since we got him back from that Hydra factory."

I thought back to all the stories Steve had told me about Bucky while we toured in the USA. They had spent many years together, were practically brothers, inseparable until Bucky enlisted. I had heard of people coming back from war different, changed – Mustang and Hawkeye came to mind – but I didn't know how Bucky changed.

No one even knew what had happened to him at the Hydra factory.

"I'm guessing he won't talk about it?" I tried.

Steve shook his head. "He insists he's fine but I can tell something is still bothering him."

I leaned against one of the corner posts, massaging my chin. "Stubborn. I'm not surprised."

Steve scoffed. "How did you think I got used to you so fast?"

I smirked, looking away. "Yeah, you're still getting the hang of it. Now, what could we do to help Bucky?" I thought back to the stories I had heard, going over common factors. Most common one: Steve. But Bucky's with Steve near constantly nowadays when on missions. "When was the last time he went out for fun?"

"The time with us and everyone else from the Team. Christmas."

"Okay. How about just the two of you?"

Steve thought it over. "About a week ago. I tried to get him to open up. It didn't work so I changed the subject." I sighed, trying to figure out what else we could do. Steve, on the other hand, seemed to have had a realization. "He hasn't been out on a date in a while."

A date? Thinking it over, that was another common thread in the stories: how Bucky had always been good with the ladies. Since I've met him though… I haven't really seen him even flirting with someone.

I nearly scoffed out loud at that thought. I barely notice flirting to begin with so I'm sure I must have missed any flirting attempts from Bucky on women.

"It could work," I finally said. "Get him to talk to someone not involved in the fighting like we are. Who wouldn't know about Hydra." The more I talked, the better the idea sounded to me. "Good luck even though I hope it does help him somewhat." I paused, lowering my gaze as I stuffed my hands into my pockets. "If you want…," I began slowly, "I guess… I guess I could try at some point to talk to him as well." It would be a good idea even if it gave the possibility for Bucky to ask his own questions.

But… I couldn't sit back for this either.

I glanced up at Steve and he was smiling gratefully. "Thanks, Ed, it means a lot." He did look more relaxed. "And, in the meantime, we'll try to get rid of these Hydra factories as quickly as possible so we can end this war."

"That sounds like a good plan," I agreed, pushing off the post and walking back towards the center of the ring. "Ready for round two?"

"In a moment, there's one last thing."

I frowned at that. It didn't look like he had anything else bothering him like he had with Bucky. "Yeah. What is it?"

"Seeing as you're free tomorrow night, be ready to head out by 7pm, alright?"

My frown deepened. "Who said I was free?"

"You had plans?"

Well… Apart from being with anyone from the team, Peggy or Howard, I would have gone to the library. However, it wasn't open that late tomorrow and I really hadn't planned anything with any of them either. "No…"

"Good. Stay that way and be ready."

"Ready for what? Are we going on another mission already? We just got back!"

"No, no mission. Just be ready."

I threw my hands in the air in exasperation. If he didn't want to make sense of the situation, I wasn't in the mood to push it. "Fine, fine. Be all secretive. I'll be ready. But, "I held up a warning finger at Steve, "if it's something silly, I'm heading right back to the room and locking the door."

Steve was trying to keep his smile to a minimum as he answered, "Don't worry, it'll be worth it."

That didn't exactly make me feel better…


The next day, I was back in the bed, still staring at that damned transmutation circle. I nearly had the outer rim deciphered but it was such a slow process… It was driving me crazy! I spent nearly all day on it and got almost nowhere!

I guess I should be thankful that 7 o'clock rolled around and that a knock on my door distracted me from the circle and from pulling my hair out.

I slid on my jacket, stuffing my notebook into my pocket as I opened the door. Steve and Bucky were waiting on the other side and they both greeted me.

"Ready to go?" added Steve.

"Almost." I reached for my scarf and hat, putting them on as I left the room, locking the door behind me. "So, where are we going?"

"You'll see."

I rolled my eyes at their behavior seeing as neither of them seemed to be willing to give me a clear answer.

"Did you eat?" wondered Bucky and my stomach answered for me. "That's what we thought," he laughed, handing me a paper bag. I opened the bag and my mouth started watering at the sight of the sandwich.

"Thanks," I said as I grabbed the food and taking a large bite of it. I followed them as we left the barracks, wondering, "So I'm guessing we're not going for dinner?"

"You'll see," replied Steve again and I rolled my eyes, taking another bite of the sandwich. As we walked, they attempted to make small talk and I indulged them, trying to figure out where they were leading me. I sadly finished the food too fast and I hoped there was more food wherever we were going.

I had to stop in my tracks though as they reached the entrance of a bar.

"Really?!" I cried out, unamused. "What is with all of you and drinking? If the whole point of this outing was to see me drunk again, it's NOT happening!"

Steve chuckled as he shook his head, making his way behind me and steering me all too easily to the door Bucky was holding open. Sometimes that serum gets on my nerves: he was even stronger than Armstrong and I couldn't wriggle myself out of the grip Steve had on my arms.

I swear, I'm going –

"There he is! Birthday boy has finally arrived!"

I was damn thankful Steve still had that grip on my arms or else I would have stumbled. Probably even tried running away.

The entire team was waiting for us, beers already in hand. I even spotted Peggy and Howard with them! I was stunned, moving automatically. Steve guided me to the table, finally letting my arm go. Someone handed me a beer and I just stared at it.

Birthday. We were February 3rd. It really was my birthday today.

Memories of the last ones flashed through my mind. Last year, I was at the SSR headquarters. I hadn't even realized my birthday had passed. The year before that, I was hiding out in the middle of the woods with three people who had tried to kill me at some point or another. I wasn't really into sharing that it had been my birthday.

Three years. It had been three years since I've celebrated my birthday with my brother. I continued to stare at the beer in my hands, trying to process that. Three of Al's birthdays I had missed as well.

How many more would I miss before I got back?

"Ed?"

I glanced to the side as Steve placed a hand on my shoulder. His expression was questioning and I almost felt bad. He had most likely organized this night and here I was, wallowing…

I smiled at him, the knowledge that I was going to finally spend a birthday amongst friends making it easier. Al would be celebrating his with Winry most likely. Granny would be there as well. Maybe even Colonel Bastard and Hawkeye. I needed to believe in that.

"Thanks everyone," I said, raising my beer to them.

"Happy Birthday, Kid!"

"A year older!"

"You can finally legally drink!"

I laughed at that last one. "Yeah, I guess so." I stole a glance at the beer, unable to believe the thought that crossed my mind. Oh, what the hell? "And I'll legally kick your asses at a drinking contest."

"You're on!" laughed Dum Dum as well and everyone save for Steve and Peggy knocked glasses.

I ignored Steve's cry of my name, bringing the mug to my lips and chugging the entire contents down in two gulps.

An echoing sound glass hitting wood from me first was well worth the exasperated sigh from Steve. Looks like I still got it.

The moment the others had finished, Dum Dum started yelling in celebration and the others followed suit. Why did I get the feeling this hadn't been their first beer that night…?

"Would you stop with all that – that howling?!" I cried out with a laugh, trying to be heard over the men.

They laughed and Falsworth leaned forward, finding something overly amusing. "Howling! I like that! Remember gents when I was trying to find us a name?"

"A name?" repeated Steve.

"Yes, for the rest of us!" continued Jim. "You have a cool name as Captain America, we thought we'd get one too!"

"And I suggested Commandos but I like it even better as Howling Commandos!" finished Falsworth as he motioned for another round of beers for most of us.

Meanwhile, I scoffed, a smirk on my face. "Seriously? That's the name you want to go with?"

"Have any better ideas, Kid?" remarked Dum Dum.

I didn't really, nor did I think the rest of us really needed a name but… I shook my head, only saying, "Nah, I guess it'll do."

The waitress returned with more beers and handed them out. Falsworth raised his, saying a little too loudly, "Cheers to Captain America and the Howling Commandos!"

Just as I toasted, Steve leaned towards me and whispered, "Try to savour this one, please."

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, sir." Just to annoy him, I took a large gulp, keeping eye contact with him and smirking he let out another exasperated sigh. It's his own fault anyway: I was going to slow it down by a lot but he decided to be a mother hen once more.

He'll learn one day that telling me what to do will have the opposite effect most of the time. Especially when it comes to trivial or logical matters. I haven't gotten drunk since that first time and I've barely drank since. Even last time, I wasn't even tipsy!

"You're such a mother hen, Steve!" laughed Howard, patting his friend on the back. "Let the Kid live a little. He's only 18 once! Let him have some fun tonight! Drink, laugh, maybe even dance with a pretty young woman." He gave a wink, motioning with his head. "I saw a few in that direction, heads up."

I was very thankful that I wasn't drinking anything at that moment or I could have choked on it. I should not have been surprised by that idea from Howard of all people but still! Now?! In front of everyone?!

Because they seemed to be agreeing to it!

"I'd want to dance with a pretty dame!" laughed Dum Dum before he raised his mug towards me. "But I'll let you have your pick first birthday boy!"

I was turning red, I could feel it and I hated that I couldn't stop myself from having that reaction. The idea of dancing with a girl I never met, a pretty one on top of that. Fuck, my face is heating up some more.

"Come now, don't be shy!" Howard moved next to me, turning me around and motioning towards a group of young women. "So, tell me, which one catches your eye?"

Which one…? "Wh-What?" I asked, shrinking back as some of the women noticed us staring. Howard even gave them a wave with his fingers.

I tried to turn back around but Howard got closer, stopping me. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He's way too close to my automail!

"Seriously, which one do you prefer? I'll introduce you!" continued Howard and I don't know if I should be thankful of how much he's already had to drink: he'll be oblivious to the automail but that's because he's distracted by trying to get me a date! "The blonde? Brunette? Just tell me which one!"

I really didn't care. I really didn't, they were all pretty but that wasn't the issue. "It's fine, Howard. You don't need to!"

"Ah! Very manly of you, Ed. You'll go yourself. I like that and those girls will as well!"

"NO!" I hissed, finally pulling away from Howard and turning back to the table. My entire face was burning by then and I focused on my drink.

"Howard, it's fine. You should drop it," added Steve softly.

"Nonsense! It must have been a while since Ed's danced with a lovely lady! He'll –"

"I can't dance, alright?" I hissed quickly, hunching over my drink even more. "I haven't dance with a girl and I'm not planning on it at the moment… I'll most likely step on her foot and hurt her."

That finally got Howard to shut up. For a couple of seconds. "Well why didn't you say so? No shame in that, Ed! Remind me to take you out, just the two of us and I'll teach you a few things they ladies are sure to like!"

I groaned, massaging my head as unwanted images popped into my head at what Howard would possibly teach me.

"Don't worry, Ed," whispered Bucky next to me and I turned towards him. He was smiling as he continued, "Steve or I will distract him while the other actually teaches you. We don't need another Howard Stark running around!"

I chuckled at that, feeling more relaxed that the conversation was moving away from myself and my inability to dance. Bucky smiled back, patting me on my back before raising his mug towards me. I raised mine as well and we cheered before taking another sip.

Bucky actually took a gulp of his beer and I let myself study him for a brief moment, my conversation with Steve coming back to me, about how Bucky was different from how Steve had known him. I wondered how exactly. At the moment, Bucky looked relaxed, happy. Maybe it was because he was with us? I didn't see Bucky alone or just with Steve so maybe…

Is this an act he's putting on for the others?

I had to pull my gaze away and focus on the others before they caught me staring too much at Bucky. However, in the back of my head for the rest of the night, I constantly wondered what exactly was different about the Bucky I know and the Bucky Steve knew.


"Edward."

I paused in the middle of pulling on my coat, glancing towards Peggy. "Yeah?"

"Would you be free two nights from now?"

I blinked, confused on how two different people have asked me similar questions in the last two days. And I began wondering if I should actually start planning things because, once more… "I don't have anything then so I guess so." I paused, thinking it over. "Is it another secret thing like this?" I motioned around us, for the idea of a surprise party. Was it someone else birthday soon?

Peggy hesitated as she glanced around. I noticed how the others were already at the door, talking, so no one we knew was nearby. "Not quite. Most likely a similar setting but its reason is quite different."

That peeked my curiosity. "Really? And why's that?"

She leaned in as she said, "SSR related. I need your help."

I tried not to let my surprise show at that. Peggy needed my help for a mission? At a bar setting none the less? What would I have to do? Out drink the person and have them drunk enough to spill their secrets?

I eyed Peggy as she waited patiently for my answer. I was tempted to reuse only for the first five seconds of the thought process only because it could be at a bar. However, it was Peggy who was asking for help.

After everything she's done for me…

"Of course," I replied.


Let me know what you think! I always love reading your comments! They give me so much fuel to write more, faster! :D