Chapter 28

Two weeks later:

"Brian, for the love of God, put some pants on," Briana sighed that morning as his stared into the refrigerator clad only in his underwear.

"Why?" Brian asked. "I'm going to have to change later anyway. No use making extra dirty clothes." He then nuzzled her neck. "You didn't complain last night."

"Brian, really, your mother is here. Can you act like you weren't raised by wolves for once?"

"She's seen me in a lot less than this. Come on; she changed my shitty diapers."

Briana shook her head. "Nadine's on her way over. At least put something on to be decent."

"Fine, I'll grab your robe," Brian grumbled. "Geez, not even married yet, and you've already gotten the nagging part down."

"We have a long day ahead of us, so quit whining. Now remember, we have the gazebo reserved for three, Paul's going to fire everything up for dinner at four thirty, and the other catering people should be coming before then to set things up. By the way, Jeff and Zeke volunteered to come over early and help Paul set up the chairs."

"Jesus Christ, it's only fifty people; it isn't a royal wedding."

"People still need a place to sit and they eventually get hungry," Briana pointed out with a grin. "Now do you think you can keep your mom entertained while I go have my hair done?"

"Don't know why; I plan on messing it up tonight." Brian wiggled his eyebrows.

"Dirty old man," she laughed. "Just tell your mother when she gets up there's plenty of things for breakfast, anything she wants, so help herself."

"I'll do better than that. She can cook one of her award-winning ones."

"Don't you dare make that poor woman do any work. She's our guest this weekend."

"Maybe you better," Paul said, walking in casually. "You don't want your husband to be near anything involving fire or heat." He grinned at Brian. "Nice robe, dude. Pale pink is your color. The little tulips are a good touch too."

"Fuck you," Brian scoffed. "Don't you know how to knock?"

"Why? I've been busting my ass out there all morning while you're in here in your frilly robe. And I still have to go home later to get cleaned up and changed."

"It's mine and Bree's wedding and I hired you as my slave for the day. Quit complaining. It's not like you have a heavy schedule anyway."

"Well, let's see. Set up the gazebo, get the grill cleaned and ready, set up a shit load of chairs and wait for the flower people to place that shit around. I probably had half a day's work done before you rolled your ass out of bed. By the way, Jeff called. He and Zeke will be here in about twenty minutes."

"The three of you working should be a blast."

"Could be an even four if you put some pants on and join the party," Paul said.

"I bust ass 300 days a year," Brian replied. "I'm not doing shit on my own wedding day."

"Paul, take a break," Briana suggested. "There's coffee in the kitchen. I was just on my way out."

"Thanks, don't mind if I do. Where are you headed already?"

"To Tina's hotel to have my hair done for the big day," she smiled. "Don't you two do anything I wouldn't do while I'm gone."

Later:

"Now for your hair," Tina announced, working with Briana's brunette locks once her makeup had been finished. "I was thinking of pulling it up a bit. Something different for you."

"Sounds like a plan," Briana nodded and smiled. "I'm really glad you could make it."

"You kidding? I wouldn't have missed this for the world."

"Better put some industrial strength spray on that, Tina," Nadine teased. "I have a feeling Bree there may be in for a wild wedding night."

"Nadine!" Briana began to laugh, blushing a little.

"Hey, I'm just saying," Nadine laughed back.

"I better put some on you too," Tina said with a wink. "From what Bree here has told me about Paul following you around like a dog in heat, you may in for an interesting night yourself."

"And people think Brian is frisky," Briana added, joining in on the fun.

"I will have you know he's been a total gentleman the whole time," Nadine replied.

Briana looked a little shocked. "Are we talking about the same Paul here? He usually pounces on anything that breathes."

"Maybe Nadine has a spell on him," Tina said. "All right, love, let's get your headpiece on."

Nadine stepped up and helped Tina with the crown of ivory roses and baby's breath and together they adjusted it until it was perfect.

"Go look!" Nadine encouraged Briana.

"Wow," she said breathlessly. "This is incredible. Guys, thanks so much."

"You look just as beautiful as you did at your first wedding," Tina smiled.

"Only considerably older," Briana nodded, smiling at both of them. "But today, I'm not having any complaints."

"Neither will your groom," Tina answered. "Now let me finish up Nadine and we can get you back to him as soon as possible. You have a big date today, after all."

Meanwhile:

"Ow, fuck, what are you trying to do, man, kill me?" Brian howled. "I don't recall saying I wanted to be bald for my wedding. Jesus!"

"Dude, you said you wanted your hair pulled back," Jeff said.

"Pulled back, not out, dumb ass."

"Try sitting still for more than thirty seconds and he may get done sooner," Paul suggested.

"This coming from the asshole who turned my hair three different colors not long ago because he didn't read the directions," Brian scoffed. "Shouldn't you be working on something?"

"Zeke's finishing the chairs and the grill's ready to go," Paul replied. "Right now while you're getting gorgeous, I'm going downstairs to take a shower. It won't take me as long to get beautiful."

"Oh thank God you're using your own shower. It was bad enough you scared the hell out of Ma earlier when she went in our bathroom while you were pissing."

"Wait, what?" Jeff asked, pausing what he was doing.

"Dipshit here didn't close the door and Ma went to take a shower to get ready," Brian explained. "Next thing I heard was this blood curdling scream. I'm surprised she didn't realize someone was in there earlier; usually a person can hear Paul pissing all the way to China."

"Your poor ma," Jeff answered sympathetically. "She's probably scarred for life."

"Either that or she's going to have some nice visions," Paul grinned. "She is pretty hot for her age, by the way."

"Dude, that's my mother!" Brian yelled.

"Seriously, man, you're gross," Jeff agreed. "All right," he added, pleased with his finished work. "See if that passes inspection."

Brian looked in a hall mirror and smiled widely. "Looking good, dude." He gave Jeff a high five in appreciation.

"Thanks. Now I need to go get my suit on while Paul over there is washing his ass and then we can all go downstairs. By then, the girls should be back in time for the festivities."