Now that I've effectively made sure there would be plenty of men to spread rumors in Howe's soldiers about myself, I go around to check on the others. Morrigan is helping Wynne with the healing. She leaves the bigger wounds be; the three of us decided just after Howe's men made a run for it that I'd deal with anything major. Guess that's what happens when everyone figures out the spirit healer is an abomination with massive stores of mana.

I crouch in front of my brother. He's got a bandage over a gash in his thigh. Not necessarily a major wound, but not necessarily minor either. "Is it deep?"

"Yes," he says, gritting his teeth. "Greatsword. Stabbed through." Oh. Explains so much more now. Yeah, I can see why Wynne left this to me. Aedan hisses in pain, muscles tensing, as I heal his wound. Once I'm sure it's closed, I allow him to take the bandages off. "Thanks, sister."

I nod, wiping my hands off on my pants before standing. "No problem." I offer him a helping hand and he takes it. I pull him to my feet when someone screams. Aedan's head whips, eyes wide.

"Leliana!" He runs despite having his leg freshly healed. Sighing, I run a hand down my face before following. Wynne and Morrigan are standing over her, confused expressions in their faces. "What happened?" He whirls on me next, eyes blazing. "I thought you healed her!"

I throw my hands up defensively. "I did!"

"Then what's this?!"

"I have no idea!" I retort, pushing past him. He staggers under the force of my shove, but keeps his footing. "Let me see." Wynne moves aside, crouching beside me. I roll Leliana's shirt up above the wound in her stomach again. I yelp, eyes widening. Even Wynne and Morrigan look shocked and disgusted.

"What? What is it?" Aedan demands.

"Poison," I grumble, grimacing. I extend a hand to Morrigan. "Give me your waterskin. Come on!" As she hands it over, I look back at Aedan. "Get Zev and Cyrus. They'll know poisons better than us. Now!" He nods, running off to find them. "Alistair! Come here!" Once he's dropped whatever he was doing, he's joined us, a questioning look on his face. "On your knees. Put her head on your lap. You two, go find elfroot. We're near the Brecilian Forest; there should be plenty inside the treeline." Wynne is gone first; Morrigan hands me several lyrium potions, just in case. Then they're gone and Aedan returns with our resident former assassins.

"What do you need, my friend?" Zevran asks, crouching on the other side of Leliana. I shoot him a look and he puts his hands up innocently.

"What poison is this?" I ask.

His face scrunches up in concentration before he says, "Incurable, I'm afraid."

"What?!"

I wave at Aedan to get him to shut up. "Incurable? As in, 'Leliana is going to die' incurable?"

Zevran nods solemnly. Cyrus thwacks him, scowling. "If we can get her to a real healer fast enough, she might make it, but otherwise...we should just dig the grave now."

I sigh, running a hand down my face. "The elves aren't that far away, and we need their help anyway. They should have healers." I hand Alistair the waterskin. "See if you can get some of that down her throat." He nods and I look back to the assassins. "Is there anything I can do right now?"

Cyrus shrugs. "Get as many healing potions down her throat as you can. It might keep the poison at bay. But I'm not sure if we have enough to last until we find the Dalish."

"We will." I get to my feet, running a hand through my hair.

What do I do? Break camp and haul ass, hoping we find the Dalish fast enough? Or do I just leave my friend to die so I don't run us ragged?

"Break camp! We move!" I shout. I look down at Alistair. "Let Aedan take over for you. Come on." I wait for him to stand and join me before I walk off toward Bodahn and Sandal. They're watching expectantly as Alistair and I walk up to them.

"What can we do for you, miss?"

"Leliana needs to ride in your cart," I say. "She was poisoned during the fighting." Bodahn nods, having Sandal go clear room for her. "We need to move quickly. The poison is fast I guess, and she needs a real healer."

"The Dalish?" Bodahn asks. I nod. "We know where they are this time of year."

"Thank the Maker!" I say, smiling. "Thank you, Bodahn. You'll tell us how to get there?"

"Of course."

"Fantastic," I say, nodding. "We'll bring her over whenever you're ready." He nods back before climbing into his cart to help Sandal. As we walk away, I tell Alistair to go find Wynne and Morrigan and bring them back. Then I go and start packing my tent.

It's going to be a long trip. I just hope Eamon can hold on because if not, I just made the wrong choice. And it could cost Ferelden everything.

Even with the ox moving as fast as oxly-possible-yes I just said that-we still don't make as much progress as we could. It's been two days of praying to the Maker and Andraste and shoving potions and water into Leliana, and we've made little progress. The Brecilian Forest is in full bloom off to our right, but Bodahn swears we still have another week at this pace. Zev and Cyrus aren't sure if Leliana will last that long, and Aedan's temper is getting shorter with each hour. He's a combustion grenade. He will explode eventually.

New plan.

"Stop!" I yell over my shoulder. My companions do so gratefully. Even the ox looks like it's happy.

"What? Why are we stopping?" Aedan snaps.

"I'm getting there," I retort angrily. He glares, but I ignore him. "Look, we're not going to get there in time. If we continue like this, Leliana's going to die and we're going to be too exhausted to remember what we were doing in the first place. So, I propose a new plan. Alistair and I will run ahead while the rest of you continue at a normal pace, camp and everything. Morrigan, I want you erecting any protective spells around the border if you can. Wynne, you too. We'll see if we can find the Dalish and bring a healer back with us." I look at Talith, trying to look as serious as possible. "I need to leave you in charge. Aedan is in no condition to lead, and you have experience regardless. If we're not back in four days, you do your best to get to their camp. Got it?" He nods. "Bodahn, I'm going to need some directions."

"Follow the road from the forest. They'll find you when you're close enough."

I nod. "Alistair, let's go." The former Templar hefts his shield, slinging it over his shoulder, and joins me. Without hesitation, I lead him into the Brecilian Forest, hoping that the Dalish won't shoot first and ask questions later. I'm not sure who that would be bad for. Us, or them. Aedan might be upset now, but if I died, that would be the end of it. I'm not sure my brother could take losing someone else. Oren was his best friend, Oriana like another sister, and he was our father's son. He looks much like father did, or at least, that's what mother used to say. Now I'm not sure if you could mention him without her breaking down and crying.

I seem to be the only one who has moved past that night, and I feel horrible about it.

"Elissa?" Alistair asks. I must've stopped running, because he's beside me, and we're standing still. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I say, blinking and shaking my head. "Just...lost in thought."

"About what?" he asks as I turn left and start paralleling the road. He follows, but he's much louder than I am despite my armor being heavier than his.

"Aedan. My family," I say softly. "I keep thinking if Leliana dies that he won't be able to continue."

Alistair blinks, confused. "Why wouldn't he be able to?"

"Because he lost more when Howe attacked us. I lost a nephew, a sister-in-law, friends, and a father. He lost a best friend, a sister, extended family, and the man he learned everything from."

"I don't understand," Alistair says. "Didn't you lose everything he did?"

"No," I say, stopping our run again to look him in the eye. "I'm a mage, and almost everyone in the castle knew it. I was an outcast in my own home, Alistair. I've never had a family who loves me unconditionally. All I have are mother and Fergus, and neither of them are happy that I'm a mage even though neither of them will ever say it. They're the closest I've had to people who love me for everything I am. I've never had a best friend or someone I considered a sister or brother who wasn't."

"That...that's horrible."

"Not really," I say, starting off again, but at a walk. "I got past that massacre faster than the rest of them did, will, whatever. It doesn't matter anyway. I'm a Warden now, and I'm perfectly happy with that."

"So...you were saying?"

"Aedan has lost too much already," I say. "I'm afraid if he loses someone else that he's just not going to have it in him to keep fighting." I pick up the pace, settling into a jog. Alistair matches it easily. "Aedan is the only family member I've ever cared about as anyone else would."

"He's your twin, right? Of course you do."

"That's not even remotely why, but I suppose that doesn't hurt."

"Then why?"

"Because he's the only person I know that doesn't give a damn that I'm a mage," I say stiffly. "He's stuck by my side since we were born. Everywhere he went, I went, and vice versa. I am terrified. If he loses Leliana, then I'll lose him, and I don't want to lose my brother, or someone I actually consider to be a good friend."

"They'll both be fine, Elissa," Alistair says. "I promise." He frowns and I raise an eyebrow.

"What?"

"You said that Aedan's the only person you know that doesn't care that you're a mage," he says, frown deepening.

"It's true."

"Then why am I so willing to...care about you the way I do?" Alistair asks. "Why does Leliana say you're her best friend? Why does Sten talk to you? Why do Zevran and Cyrus trust you to let them live? Why does Talith leave you be despite that creepy glowing thing?"

I don't answer.

"We're your friends. Friends shouldn't care about whether or not you're a mage," he says.

I look up at him, raising an eyebrow. "We're just friends?"

His eyes go wide, but I manage to keep a straight face. "I...I didn't mean it that way, Elissa! I just...I don't-"

I put a hand on his shoulder and stop running again, smirking at him. "I knew what you meant. I'm just teasing you." I stand up on my toes and kiss him softly before running off again. "Well what are you waiting for? Come on!"