A/N - Hope you all are prepared for Christmas. I don't have any plans. I'm just going to be at home, cuddling with my cat in front of the tree, watching Home Alone and National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. I'm sending all of you love. PREPARE YOURSELF FOR CUTENESS OVERLOAD FROM REGINA!
Excerpt:
I couldn't remember the last time I had seen her that peaceful.
"Emma," she mumbled, her toes moving under the super huge red blanket that was so thick. The little yellow bunnies that were sprinkled all over the material really made her appear so much cuter.
But she was still sleeping.
So my presence was sensed, or was she dreaming about me?
I tiptoed into the room, and from the time my body was like six inches away from her, those brown eyes fluttered open slowly.
X
I always, wholeheartedly believe that there is a time for everything.
There is a time for the purest of pain to be felt, a time for the purest of love to be met, when you suddenly cross paths with the one you are destined to marry. When you finally bury the hatchet with a foe, a friend who had bruised your life and left a cold sore. There is a time when we stare into the eyes of our best friends and realize that your journey must go on without them. People die. Flowers bend their heads in sorrow and the wind becomes harsher. The sun's rays become fiercer and at some point, it dawns upon you.
Life changes us all every single day.
You might not even be aware of it but as you're reading about my life and the people directly involved in it, your life is also changing. You might accept it, but through my insecurities and my doubts, through my crankiness and bouts of ignorance, your brain registers those moments and they are stored. Why? In your life, even if that time hasn't come already, you will definitely be faced with the same kind of situation that either myself, or Chad, or Killian, Neal, Will, my parents, Lizzie, Dazzle, Flames, even Peter faced.
You'll put your social life above the person who truly loves you. Chances are, you'll be like Killian and suddenly realize that you're gay and you're in love with this person who chases the club life. Or like Neal, a guy who saw more in me than just a best friend but he was never too lucky to win. You'll feel defeated. More than likely, all of us walked in Will's shoes; just a very reasonably nice guy who wanted to find that one special girl. Lizzie, who lashed out on me because of the fact that she was faced with a dead end and she was going to die. Peter, losing his job and starting over.
Stories.
There I was, sitting on my knees buried into her red carpet with a spoon of Menthodex Cough Syrup near parted lips. Lying on the couch, half of her aching body covered under my pink Hello Kitty blanket, Regina was being consumed by a horrible fever. The coughing fit was growing worst and I had all my bets placed on the flu. Some way or the other, even though she always took her vitamins and stuff, always ate healthy, some asshole in Dazzle had spread their stupid germs in the air.
"Open up," my tone was soft. I felt so raw inside, so really worried. "Let the bus drive into the terminal." It was a poor excuse to slip in some humor but necessary.
"Emma," she croaked, her lips twitching into a smile. Warm fingers wrapped around the wrist belonging to my hand holding the spoon steady. "Really."
"Vroom, vroom," I mimicked my mom, back in the days when she used to feed me medicine. "We need to let the kids off. So open up."
Her lips parted in the moment just when I couldn't hold in my laughter as she did the same. The reference was so funny, but it had to be done because her spirits needed to be lifted in some way. After spending most of the night growing so cold and aching all over, I needed her to smile. I just needed her to look at me and know deep down inside that no matter what, I'd always be there. Because it was such a terrible moment, to watch her like that. The flu or any other terrible sickness, it was like a tsunami of feels, covering my heart up.
"Johnny said that you should take the Advil now and then in the next six hours. He also said that you should take these Vitamin C ones." I reached for the brown paper bag upon the chair between us and pawed around inside until the tablets were felt. Fishing them out between two fingers, they were showed to her. "I like the fact that they're orange. Plus he said that you can suck on them like mints. They supposedly taste like oranges."
"And what else did Johnny say?" her cupped fingers caressed my chin. Brown eyes were moistened from tears but her expression was so warming.
"Um," I gestured to the bottle of Menthodex resting on the glass table, "there's that and then I'll make lots of soup."
"Emma, you need to get to work -"
"I'm glad that we stocked up on canned ones," I ignored her deliberately, the aching in my chest never going away. "Especially the packet ones. So I can just toss them into the microwave or use a pot."
"It's almost nine."
"I'm not going anywhere," I said, tears filling my eyes. Busying myself with the paper bag, and trying to avoid eye contact, I licked my lips and stood up, feeling shaky. "Let me get a glass of water so you can take the Advil now."
"You have to...go," she ended up coughing. "I'll be fine."
"I can't just leave you here like this. So stop asking me to." There I stood by the water cooler, a finger pressed onto the tap and my eyes just couldn't latch on anything else except the sofa where she was.
As if by some extraordinary miracle, the cordless rang, a little plastic, red handset resting on its black cradle on the wall just outside our bedroom. Staring at the damn thing, it took me four rings to rest the glass on the red and black tiled counter top and to rush over there. You can just imagine my surprise when it was Chad on the other end.
"How bad is she on a scale from one to like ten? Ten being like close to an unconscious state?"
"One hundred."
"You're so biased, cause you're in love with her. So even a little scratch on her finger will rip your bra in two -"
"Look, I have a right to be worried," I said defensively, noting how she was sitting up now slowly, coughing into a blue, apple printed rag. "She never gets sick, and you know that. So for her to just start coughing and stuff..."
"Could be the work of voodoo," he joked. "Cora probably worked up some black magic."
"Could be."
"I'll be over there in about fifteen. No classes today, so I got time to burn on babysitting."
"I'm staying home," I said.
"As if she'll allow that," he laughed and made my nerves sizzle. "Good luck trying to stay away from work with your boss as your sick girlfriend. Have you ever realized that she could fire you? Your boss, who happens to be your girlfriend, she has the authority to fire you?"
"Shut up and get over here," I muttered, missing his constant humor and cheerful disposition.
Fifteen minutes later, and I mean exactly fifteen minutes later, the doorbell chimed through the apartment. Just then, I was slipping into my clothes, dressing for work because a certain someone wasn't about to give in to me staying home. Fussing and growling, sneezing fits and scowling at me, demanding that it was her sick day to take and not mine. To save a quarrel, I decided to at least give Chad a chance to watch over her whilst I headed off to work.
Not that it didn't place a burden on my heart. Knowing that distance would be between us in a time like this when obviously I was needed the most. And yet, she simply could not bypass my job attendance and have me stay by her side. As if any girlfriend would ever feel entirely comfortable leaving at a time like that. Wanting to cuddle the one person you loved so much. Because even as I'd rush off o work, more than likely my mind would continuously be focused on anything else but work.
He came in like a ball of sunshine, smiling from ear to ear and hugging these two bags of I don't know what the heck was inside. At first, I believed that my sweet tooth would be spoiled. But depositing them onto the glass table, Chad pawed around inside and fished out something that completely had me like 'woah, what the hell is that?' instantly.
It was a freaking stuffed white rabbit with pink ears that hung down low, dressed in this little red jumper and tiny red shoes. About a foot long, it was, and he bounced with excitement as the chair where she rested on was approached. I stood by the door, ready to head out, keys in one hand, red leather jacket draped over the other arm and observed the scene before me. What happened was astonishing and it unfolded in slow motion.
Clutching the rabbit between his hands, he dangled it above her. "Look who's here, to cuddle with you."
Yeah right. Wait for it to be scowled at. One, two, three...
"Mister Cuddles!" she croaked, brown eyes widening, face upturned. "How thoughtful!"
Mister...WHAT?
I didn't know how the heck that cute and cuddly thing managed to win her affections at some point, but it did. The poor thing was snatched and pressed to her flushed face whilst Chad's eyes met mine. What scandal was that? To think that my stuffed animals were kicked off the bed constantly and growled at whilst this...rabbit was deeply loved. Where did IT come from? What was its purpose?
"Long story cut short," Chad said smiling and moving to the kitchen, "I gave her Mister Cuddles when she was pregnant with Kay in the hospital. Slept with the thing all the time. Then..." he helped himself to a can of Coke in the fridge, "...after the hurricane that swirled around the divorce, and other losses, plus when she was suicidal -"
I stared at Regina hugging the rabbit and didn't blink.
"...the stuffed thing kind of, I dunno," he shrugged, walking towards me, "it gave her cuddles, I guess. Spoke to her. As she said, and I quote," he cleared his throat, "I would gaze upon the toy and think of how rabbits keep digging and digging underground, never giving up -"
"I never said that!" she protested, her voice so hoarse that it was cracking.
"I would stare into the eyes of thine rabbit and wish that thy courage would return, thy zest, thy motivation," Chad chanted, dramatically puffing out his chest, face upturned. "To reproduce in such numbers, that would continue their line for generations to come."
"I should probably get up, get dressed and drag myself to work," she muttered, a hand resting on her forehead, eyes fluttering close. "This day will be anything but peaceful with him around."
"Oh I know!" Chad would never cease to amaze me as he suddenly had a 'lightbulb' moment, eyes widening. "Let me fetch your makeup case and I'll experiment with your cosmetics."
"Emma," she stared at me, her chest heaving, "please."
"At least you'll be occupied and...he's a great sitter," I gestured at Chad as he disappeared into our bedroom.
"HE'S GOING TO TOUCH MY MAKEUP," she stated like a spoiled child in such a loud tone. "I DO NOT LIKE IT WHEN PEOPLE TOUCH MY MAKEUP."
"Hey, Chad," I called out, opening the door, "I'm heading out now."
"Emma!" she whined.
"The worst that could happen is having these little holes dug inside your pools of eye shadows, and a few lipsticks breaking in half," I shrugged and smiled. "I'll call you whole day so be prepared."
"Text me too," her cupped fingers were lifted and wiggled in my direction. She smiled back sweetly. "Bye, Chrissy."
I wasn't that blonde and I wasn't that dumb. We ran Three's Company marathons sometimes but the Chrissy thing was totally not cool. It wasn't even funny because during our Sunday nights spent watching episodes back to back, she'd laugh her ass off at the woman's 'blonde' moments. Now there I was, wondering what was meant exactly by the sudden reference.
"Bye, Janet," I muttered, closing the door behind me. I could practically hear her hoarse chuckle as my footsteps led away.
The nerve of her. Couldn't I at least be called Clarke from The 100 or 'the Root to her Shaw'? I should have just called her Mrs. Roper, and scowling, my car was unlocked.
Strange things happen in the strangest moments, don't they? I mean, we could be going about our lives one step at a time, completely lost in our own thoughts when suddenly, we find a dead rat under the right front wheel of our cars. Come on. There it was, its little life freshly taken from the looks of it and I knew to myself that its death hadn't been brought on by me. The car hadn't been used since two days ago. So how the heck did a freaking dead rat end up near the wheel of my car?
My eyes roamed the sidewalk for another pair that would be focused in that direction, observing my every move. Thinking that it was a good joke to tickle my nerves. But everyone was just on their way, moving one direction or the other and never even skinning an eye my way. Chad would never taunt me like that, would he? So this had to be the work of forces we must never reason with, the invisible that walk among us and find it oh so funny to do things like this. I was mad, losing my shit as the door was unlocked.
Backing up slowly, I swerved into traffic and was on my way, gripping the wheel tightly.
"Oh the poor thing," Barbara's clenched fists were pressed together and resting snugly between her boobs. Offering me a sympathetic look, she shook her head. "She never misses a day, so it must be quite bothersome. The sneezing and such."
"Plus she has a fever and a migraine, sore throat and she still forced me to come to work."
"Well that's what happens when your boss is also your lover," she winked at me.
I guess you will remember by now that since we were outed at the staff party by sharing that dance, everyone knew of the blonde from Customer Service and Marketing dating the Vice President in the expensive suits who wore Jimmy Choos and had a Louis Vuitton handbag.
What can I say?
I was a simple girl who snatched things on sale from department stores, even though my girlfriend was a brand name fangirl. She literally went on these little bouts of shopping in stores that made my eyes pop out. Most times, I'd decline her invitations on these trips into boutiques sprinkled around New York because it made me feel uncomfortable. Like we'd be standing in front of a rack of coats with furry coated interiors, some were even mink and she'd bat through them without staring at the prices.
"I should use the opportunity to get rid of that blasted apple scented air freshener," Barbara scowled, staring at the closed green door. "It irritates me. She's so obsessed with the fruit, I swear, it is unbelievable."
"Her shampoo is watermelon scented," I offered in a different light, shrugging too. "So that's a change."
"Is there an apple store somewhere in New York that I don't know about?" the old lady who was an older version of my mother peered up at me from behind her desk. "I'd like to burn it down."
That made me laugh.
"So is she home alone then?" she typed away slowly on her keyboard, head lifted a little to peer through those bifocal glasses.
"Nah, her son's there with her."
"Oh he's such a darling, and a handsome young man too. Once a Marine, always a Marine, my husband used to say. He is so disciplined. She did well with that child. Bless his soul."
"Have you ever met the daughter?" I was really wondering about Kay these days, because she seemed to have dropped off the face of the earth.
"Not that I can recall. I've heard of her existence but never had the good fortune of meeting a smaller version to the bigger one. Oh, before I forget, there's a staff meeting scheduled for four today, so be prepared."
"Seriously? Setting a meeting an hour before five? Most staff meetings last over two hours in here," I pointed out. "Who's heading this one since she's not in?"
Her fingers tapped on the keys. Barbara was most likely bringing up her notes to double check. Telephones rang around us.
"Lemon pits," she pursed her lips and our eyes met. "Duck lips."
I had to press a palm onto my mouth to muffle the outburst of giggles because her descriptions were so spot on in relation to the Human Resource Manager, Debra. She was this beefy woman from the same floor we were on, with oily black hair and rolling pins as arms. And for some odd reason, the lady was always munching on sour cream Pringles with this huge bottle of lemonade on her desk. Under the sleeves of her shirts were always wet from sweating in a perfectly air conditioned building. Her photo on Facebook was the origin of the name 'duck lips' because...and you know why.
"Let's see who sits next to her in the meeting," I snorted as Barbara shook her head immediately. "I'm making sure that I show up in the conference room like ten minutes earlier than four."
"Hope it's not Larry."
Our laughing fits were drawing attention from those snobbish girls who belonged to Accounts. They stared at us as if we were lepers or something and moved on, whispering behind their hands.
I wasn't a favorite, never was and never would be among most of the staff because for the obvious reason that I was dating one of the big ones, a member of the Board of Directors, the V.P, former CEO of Dazzle and most definitely the hottest woman in the entire building, and on the face of the earth. She had style though, handling their glares and whispers and bitchiness. Regina walked with the poise of a Queen. And I mean definitely.
Not with her chin up or anything but a sense of composure and silence in her presence that destroyed their snobbishness. None of them would even risk being disrespectful to her, never. They were scared of her, trembling in their cubicles whilst she moved by like a leopard, brown eyes so intense, they could burn holes through their hate.
Ne-Yo probably met her and then sang 'Miss Independent' afterwards.
That's how classy she was.
And Blondie was too scared to use her name as their song title, so they titled it as 'Maria' instead, frightened of being sued millions of dollars. They got away with slipping her name in there anyway though. They were lucky.
She moves like she don't care
Smooth as silk, cool as air
Ooh it makes you wanna cry
She doesn't know your name
And your heart beats like a subway train
Ooh it makes you wanna die
Ooh, don't you wanna take her?
Ooh, wanna make her all your own?
Maria, you've gotta see her
Go insane and out of your mind
Regina, Ave Maria
A million and one candle lights
I lived for that woman's existence.
Spending time between working on a couple of customers by googling 'Chuck Norris Memes', the morning went by smoothly. Lunchtime came and the worry, although eased away by Chad's presence back in the apartment, it was still present. So whilst I sat next to Barbara in the cafeteria, after forking up a massive bowl of potato salad, spaghetti and sauce, the texting began.
You can just imagine my face when, after I simply asked her how things were going and if she missed her 'bae', Regina replied with a photo on WhatsApp that made me want to flip a table.
It was an image of that stuffed white rascal, captioned, 'bae has been replaced. I have a new bae. She's so soft.'
'I'm soft,' I replied with a sad face whilst Barbara spoke about Young and the Restless and no vocal contribution was made on my part because I didn't even watch the show. 'Don't you love me?'
I SUPPOSE.
What do you mean, you SUPPOSE?
Another picture of the rabbit was sent, and this time, the stuffed animal was strategically placed between the softest legs ever created by the big man upstairs in the clouds, legs that were hidden from me by a pair of long black tights.
I HATE HIM.
Don't be jealous. It's a she. I drank the bottle of Menthodex already. Need new one. Please buy.
I stared at the phone and grew numb because she had to be kidding me. Possibly it could mean something completely opposite, that the bottle's contents hadn't been depleted that much and she just needed me to stock up for later. Not that she had sucked up the entire thing already! Five hours hadn't even passed by as yet!
Excusing myself from the table, I dialed her number and headed for the outside, just through the side door that led into a back yard containing a small garden and iron chairs under a shade. My workplace, in case I never completely described it before, was a massive building containing possibly forty floors with Flames residing in twenty of the total from the bottom to the middle. My department was on the sixth and varied because we oftentimes had to move and it never was a problem since the layout remained the same on every floor for every department. One span of time, I had to climb to the fourth and then the eight but right then, it was the sixth. And the outside of the building was covered in tinted green glass.
Funny but there was an insurance company that resided above us.
"Has the building been destroyed as yet in my absence?" was her greeting, the huskiness of that voice sounding so cute in my right ear. "Barbara needs to call Jessie. And George."
I was pretty sure that poor Barbara's phone had been ringing all morning and whoever Jessie or George were, they had been called already. But it was normal of her to be making a fuss 24/7. It would never stop, the way that brain of hers worked every split second. Remembering this and that, who to call, when to enter a meeting, and who to harass. She just couldn't lie down and sleep. It was like the ultimate crime, to close those tired brown eyes and rest.
"Regina," I took a deep breath, pinching the middle of my forehead, eyes closed, "please don't tell me that you swallowed the entire bottle of cough medicine."
"Yes."
"Yes...what?" I felt like a parent, about to rant off on a kid.
"I did it."
"You did what?" It was unbelievable. I found myself staring at nothing in particular.
"I need another bottle."
"Regina, you're overdosing on the damn thing!" I started off, wondering what the heck Chad was doing. "You're supposed to take it four times a day!"
"I did already," she sniffed and it was evident that she had nasal congestion. "I took it every hour since you left."
"That's not what it means!" I hissed into the phone. "Where's Chad?"
"I think he honestly fell asleep on the carpet," she croaked, "he looks too peaceful from behind to be studying still."
"Listen to me," I tried to breathe and relax myself, "if you think that you can suck up a bottle of cough medicine just like that, and you'll get another one, then you're wrong."
"You have to get me another one."
"Oh, I do?" I expressed disbelief in my tone. Somehow traffic was so noisy in the streets around me.
"Yes. Because I'm your other half. The other half of your heart. The ying to your yang. Your Juliet, as you are my Romeo. So you have to take care of me. Buy me another one because I said so and you know deep down inside that you love me so much, you really don't want to see me so sick."
I was melting. I couldn't believe it. She was using her charms on me and it was so effective. The very first thing that came to mind after that little statement was her, curled up on the sofa like a comma and this saddened look on that beautiful face, coupled with a small pout.
"Will you buy it then?" Her voice was doing things to me.
"I don't know as yet."
"Emma."
"Yeah."
"I think that I'm going to die."
"Stop it," I actually smiled from her ridiculous worry. "You're not going to die. You're going to be fine."
"Emma, I don't think it's the flu."
"Then what could it be?"
"I think it's something else. I've had the flu several times before and this feels entirely different. The one time I felt this way, it was after the miscarriage. When my immune system suddenly went downhill."
"And what happened then? How did you feel back then?" I was growing worried, too much.
"It was pneumonia," she said. "I felt the same way. Weaker and my chest felt as if an elephant was sitting on it. The same as now. And I threw up the soup you made. Plus, even buried under two blankets, I'm so cold. My hands are trembling."
"My poor baby," I said softly, deciding that the meeting would be missed that afternoon and I'd go straight home. "Don't worry. I'll be there in no time. Do you think that you can close your eyes and try to sleep?"
"I can't," her voice shook, and it was evident that as much as I was worried about her and my eyes were moist from tears, she could literally sense the surge of emotions through the line. "I can't sleep without you next to me. It's...silly...really," she sniffed, "but I just wish that you could hug me right now."
"Regina," I started to lose my composure, chest heaving, "I'm going to get my stuff and head home now."
"Noo," she croaked, as usual, being stubborn about work and work ethics. "You have to stay and attend the meeting. It's important."
"Not as important as you though," I reminded her. "And you know that."
"No, stay. I'm drowsy anyway. I think that I'll sleep. The aching has subdued and the coughing. So maybe if I close my eyes, sleep will come. Don't bother coming home now. I can manage."
"Are you sure?" my chest was aching so much, from being conflicted, two thirds of my mind already deciding to head home.
"Yes, I'm sure. Sleep time. Bye, bye."
"Stop being so cute," I smiled, feeling so mushy from the way she sounded. "I love you, babe."
"Love you too." Her yawn made me hang onto the call for as long as it lasted. I stayed there and listened to her breathing and then when the line disconnected, my heart felt so soft.
X
Apparently every single person to attend the meeting didn't want to sit next to Debra so the crowd inside the conference room was massive at a quarter to four. There I was, clutching my yellow notepad with faint red apple watermarks in the center of every page, compliments of Regina's stationery. A black, gel ink pen and purposely wearing my black tailored jacket. Because let's get one thing straight in relation to Flames: everyone somehow had thicker skin than me since the A.C was always turned up to the highest.
Debra was sweating.
How in the world could a woman sweat like a pig inside that freaking freezer? Even with close to fifty employees inside the damn conference room, the armpits of her red shirt were already. She was standing just by the wall of glass overlooking New York, speaking with a lot of hand gestures at a Director, some guy by the name of Chris who smiled too much and work seriously expensive suits. Apart from them the rest of people were giggling and chatting up each other. Larry was taking his seat alongside the supervisors from the other departments and the two guys remaining from my department, they were gesturing for me to get my butt over there, since a vacant seat was still staring at me.
"I give it an hour tops," Javier said, raking fingers through his gelled black hair. He was from Canada and could also speak fluent French. "Probably going to tell us about the loss of staff, cutting back on expenses, we need to work hard, blah, blah, blah." He snatched my pen and smiled. "Hey sexy."
Justin laughed, a twenty six year old who was dirty blonde and concealing a bunch of tattoos under his clothes.
Debra cleared her throat and those green eyes roamed the crowd. The Director chatted on and on, gesticulating a lot and then two other suits joined them.
I missed Regina so much in there, seriously.
Her presence would be amazing in those meetings, every single one. Coming in with her powerful suits and flawless honey colored skin, holding a green folder as always between those well manicured fingers. The way everyone would suddenly shut up and gaze at her, obviously wondering how the heck she was so beautiful. Because she was, no doubt about it. I wasn't being biased just because we were in love with each other and my heart literally screamed every time we met inside that place. It was the truth, knowing that she could captivate their attention as it ever so often occurred, and then they'd all realize how much attention was paid to her and their ignorant whispers would begin.
Even when Mally sauntered in, her blonde hair curled neatly like a diva from one of those black and white movies, and she took her seat along the front table where the other big ones were seated, my heart ached to see Regina there. Her chair remained vacant. This whole inside of me was caving in and my throat ached so much, I had to stare down at the cover of the notepad. Hoping that she was sleeping, wondering if she was and worrying every single second about her. That's how it was.
"Welcome to one and all," Mally beamed at us, wearing a shocking green, satin blouse and tight tailored black pants. Her green fingernails were rested on the oak desk, and her posture was relaxed. "As you're all wondering, why are we here? For today's points to be discussed, we'll be speaking about the recent changes in the company, the obvious fact that we have to cut expenses and a desperate plea for hygiene to be taken seriously in the workplace."
Someone snorted from behind me and I distinctly heard Debra's name.
"Smelly Debbie," Javier whispered into my ear, "that's her new name."
The woman in question was staring hard at someone in the back and I heard chairs squeak as people craned their necks to point out who it was. Bastards. As much as I didn't like the Human Resources Manager because she behaved like a retarded fool, it wasn't up to me to ridicule the woman's hygiene. She probably had a body heat problem or something and Regina and I shared the same view. Never to judge someone easily before knowing about the whole picture. Besides, whether she was lacking in her grooming habits or whatever, that wasn't my problem.
I had bigger fishes to fry and I sure as hell was about to be handed a plateful.
How it happened, I can't remember exactly but my pen was moving across the notepad, scribbling notes about the areas and states in the USA that we needed to tackle and build up our customer base. Javier was seated on my left, that much I remember because he kept jamming me with his right hand whilst writing too. Justin on my right. So I was sandwiched by the two dudes from my department when this bitch behind me whispered something that seriously sizzled my anger to boiling point.
"Guess Majestic Mills couldn't even get out of her office to come because she's so damn important."
I sat there. I blinked to the front and stabbed my memory repeatedly to replay the line over and over again, just to sharpen the words a little more. Maybe she hadn't used the word 'Mills' but another name and my brain jumped to that particular conclusion because Regina was on my mind. That's what I thought at first. Mally's voice became so distant as all my attention was focused behind me.
"Probably locked up in there cooking the books. I bet she's the one stealing funds. After all, she's coming from a competitor, Dazzle. And now we're all in shit, people getting laid off because someone, most likely her, is being sneaky thief."
"Yeah."
"Don't talk too loud, her woman is sitting right there."
There were hushed whispers and I could feel Javier staring at me. He wasn't staring because of sharing the same views as whoever the speaker was. But it was an accepted fact that the people I worked with in the Customer Service department, they were never disrespectful to Regina, or my relationship with her, or me. Never me. And to sit there and have these other women from other departments go on about someone I really loved, not only was she my boss but my girlfriend, I was so conflicted. I was getting so angry and I didn't know what to say, so my mouth was kept shut.
All my life I had been raised to be respectful and humble by my parents. Mom taught me how to control myself in terrible situations, like when Lizzie had chased me out of the hospital and I wanted to rush back in there and yell at her. Taking me by the shoulders, she basically told me that I should never stoop to someone's level, no matter how far down the line they are. Respect was first and foremost and I can honestly tell you that as much as Regina would fire back at them, her advice to me would be 'just stay calm, Emma and don't take them on'.
I tried, I really did.
I kept thinking about her and knowing that she'd urge me to block their negativity out but it reached a point where their rudeness cracked me. Obviously her sass had rubbed off on my humble soul. She was, in more ways than one, my superhero, and there were things that I unconsciously learned from her. Like if someone is out to ridicule you, to a point where their accusations are absolutely unjust, then it gives you every right to step in.
"Excuse me," I said, turning my head a little and never making eye contact with whoever it was sitting just behind, "can you please stop with the disrespect and just shut the hell up?"
Their whispers died down. Someone's page rustled and Mally was still talking up front.
"I'm trying to listen to what the CEO is saying and you're annoying."
"Then find another seat," the person said, her voice sounding so familiar, I had to turn myself completely around in the chair to see who the heck it was.
Anna.
Well how totally not surprising that moment was for me.
Remember there was a time some time before when Barbara and I were in the elevator and there were these two girls I told you about from the Accounts Department? Maybe I didn't mention them because they were seriously unimportant but the speaker was one of them and her roll of toilet paper who wiped her ass sat in the other seat: Sasha. The two of them were like annoying flies that kept buzzing in your ears, glamouring up too much, accessorizing too much and honestly believing that they were drop dead gorgeous. When the truth was, Anna had a pair of bug eyes that took up more than enough of her ugly face and Sasha had a bad acne problem.
"What's your problem?" she gave me attitude, staring and awaiting a cat fight. "Lesbo missing her girlfriend?"
"That's enough," Barbara's voice suddenly slipped in from the same row. "Stop it this second and pay attention."
"Lesbo," Anna mouthed, smirking. "Bet you think you're better than all of us, since you're kissing the V.P's ass." A couple of the staff around her actually seemed to approve of that statement, nodding or shifting their eyes with a smirk.
My gaze rested on Barbara with her gray hair. I was given a look to suggest that they weren't worth it, and when Javier squeezed my left arm, the front of the room got my attention again. Of all the times to harass me about my relationship with Regina, the Anna had to bring it up in a staff meeting. She had to humiliate me in front of the majority of the employees and what bruised me the most was the definite look of approval on their faces.
Mally had stopped speaking and one of the suits had taken the forefront, his clipped tone grating at my nerves.
"As per the plans set down by discussions between the Directors," his cold gray eyes rested on the one seated on the right, "and the partners involved, the main aim of this year is to snatch back our customer base and to build from there."
"Then why the hell did you fire close to fifteen customer reps within the past month when we will need them to call up people?" was someone's bold question from behind me. Everyone swiveled their heads, a sea of eyes resting on Butch Dickson from upstairs, another dirty blonde who honestly believed that he was the most amazing supervisor in the entire building.
The suit stared at him, obviously startled by the sudden interruption.
Mally smiled around. She was glamorous and everyone loved that. "That's a good question. A very good one," her tone was steady, "after a lot of calculations, projected forecasts, and basic studies, we are positively sure that our current workforce can handle the job quite nicely."
"You mean that you want to pressure us," Butch said, staring around to gain approval. A few nods were achieved. "You want to give us a heavy workload and pressure us."
"With all the people they've fired," Javier leaned in and whispered to me, "can't we at least get a raise in salary? Like by even two percent?"
My head was shaken because I had thought of it before, giving us a little more since thousands of dollars had been cut out. But after doing some careful consideration, without involving Regina in the discussions going on in my head, I realized one thing. We would be the last people to get a slight increase in our salaries. The obvious increase if any were to be given would be directed at the big ones.
There's something that I haven't told you before, well at least I think that it wasn't mentioned before. It's about her condo in New York. Believe me, I don't intend to come across as disapproving on anything in regards to her but the truth still remains. And the truth is, when we started dating, even then I knew that a chunk of money from Dazzle was being used to pay for her expenses such as the rent for the condo, internet access, her driver, first class flight fares and other stuff. Now the same happened with Flames.
She didn't own the condo. It troubled me that she would give Killian the impression that it was hers when the beautiful piece of space was on a lease. The huge mansion in Los Angeles, which I hadn't seen as yet, more than half was supposed to be hers. The ranch Henry left her, well she had that still, making renovations and keeping for the possibility of renting. And that meant, with the obvious truth hanging in the air that she didn't take care of those expenses, her bank account was beyond huge. We never discussed salary but I was so sure that it reached six digits or even seven.
I didn't care about her money though.
What I cared about was the simpler things to some people that meant the world to me. Like her presence, the way she smiled, being there for me, loving me completely and trying her best to make our relationship as comfortable as possible. She was by far the most amazing person in my life, apart from mom and dad and I would never focus on the money in her bank account in comparison to the way she made me feel. Love. A simple word that had been so stupid to me before I met her and now it meant so much. It had so much substance.
Suddenly the meeting was in an uproar as one of the suits started to raise his voice at a Debra, seated two chairs along the table from him. Eyes wild, he sputtered and lifted a green folder, brandishing it at the woman who was still sweating in the conference room, as cold as a freezer.
"The facts are here! All here!" he waved the folder in her direction. "After continuous considerations, that plan was made -"
"Without the consultation of any other manager or supervisor working here!" she belted back, growing flustered. "Had you come to us and taken our reports into consideration, then you would have seen that we're understaffed, simply because you took it into your own hands to fire the majority of staff."
"We had to cut back on expenses." The suit remained standing.
"So you carelessly fire over fifty people from this head office. What kind of management is that?"
"Are you questioning the decision making panel, the directors? Are you questioning our credibility?" his eyes were beady now.
I actually found the drama really entertaining, so sliding down a little in my soft leather chair, a deep breath was taken. Thank God Regina wasn't here, because her sass always reared its head in these situations and it was more than likely that she would have stepped in. That was Regina. The one who fired back and wasn't afraid to burn people in their seats.
"We sat down," the suit gestured along the panel including Mally, two other suits, and Regina's empty chair, "and we poured over decision after decision. Options," he said, staring at her now, "everything was carefully assessed and debated on."
"I want to know where the money is going to," Debra folded her arms and turned that chubby face towards the glass wall overlooking New York, the sunlight now fading.
"That's confidential. We don't have to divulge that kind of information to lower management."
"Lower management?" she stared back at him. "I am the Human Resource Manager! I'm not a supervisor or a customer rep! My opinions, my views are supposed to be heard."
Larry stared at her, in fact, all the supervisors did. And one of them, Patricia, a gorgeous Hispanic with light brown hair, she displayed a look of complete disbelief, lips parted.
"You're out of line," the suit said, and his attention rested on Mally who, as always, would appear calmer and more humble than anyone in the room.
"Debra, your opinion is most appreciated," she said, smiling at the lot of us as if it was a party. "Please be reminded though, that I own this company and any final decision is passed by me. I also consult my board, my V.P, and my very handsome husband who isn't here at the moment."
A couple of people laughed around the room but all seriousness was shown on more than enough faces, including Butch who seemed to agree with the H.R manager.
"I would definitely question the credibility of your V.P when she once worked for our top competitor and now she's on the decision panel," Debra said boldly, and my heart started to beat really fast. "How can you even trust someone like that? She doesn't even socialize with any of us, is a definite snob and she thinks that she's so high and mighty -"
"That's more than enough," Mally tried to smile but her expression was stiff. Any eye contact was avoided with the woman who spoke against my baby. "I beg you to sit down and leave that kind of talk for the grapevine -"
"Why don't you fire her and use that fat salary to fuel the company's revenue -"
"I will not tolerate that kind of disrespect being displayed in front of me," Mally's tone was suddenly so bitter and cold, the room grew silent as a grave. "In regards to any of my staff, whether it be a supervisor, a manager, a Director or my V.P, especially my Vice President of this company. I will not allow you or anyone to speak against them in such a public forum. Yes I can vouch for her credibility and so can the board." The suits nodded and my heart was tickled from their consideration.
"She is by far the best part of management that we have ever had, and I can most definitely tell you and anyone else interested that she is not a snob. Her choice to never socialize with other employees is respected by me because I understand. Never label someone as snobbish, simply because they choose to focus on their work instead of participating in gossip. Take your seat."
All of us stared at Debra who remained standing now, her chest heaving.
Mally sighed, and somehow, her gaze rested on me. For a moment, I felt as if she was trying to convey a message, and our eyes latched on to each other. Nothing though, could be understood from the way she was looking at me because my mind, and my heart was racing.
"Sit down, Debra, or I'll be damned," she said, and a part of my memory was pinched.
I sat there and it took me a few seconds to realize that those words, that direct order, in that particular sequence, someone had used that line before. And that person, after being ridiculed by a bunch of people in the room, she had been highly praised by the woman who would always consider her as a best friend. Regina. There was me, trying to contain my outburst as Debra sat down slowly.
The meeting went on smoothly afterwards as no one spoke up again. I sat there missing the drama, hoping to have more, like a chair being pelted at the wall or something. But nothing of that sort happened. I started to yawn and wondered what Regina was doing. Probably cuddled up in a ball, waiting on me to show up. So you can just imagine the relief shown on my face when the discussions ended and Mally said that we could go.
I tried so hard to clamp my mouth shut when Debra slid past me in the hallway, her fists balled, heading to the elevator. Who the hell did she think she was to speak out against Regina like that? In front of everyone! When it was a known fact that many of them didn't like her, it suddenly dawned upon me that her disrespect had been planned. She sat there, gathering steam and knowing to herself that there were so many people in the room who shared the same views as she did. They didn't like me either.
You should have seen the looks I got from the majority of them as they passed me by. But like I said, the guys working in my department and a couple others, they were really nice to me. Even Patricia squeezed my right arm and told me to ignore them because she thought Regina was an excellent boss. Larry was ready to confront Debra and had to be convinced by Javier and myself that it wasn't worth the effort. I mean, we had the suits and Mally to deal with her, didn't we? She really and truly believed that her ignorant opinion mattered more than anyone else's. And that wasn't true at all.
X
You can't begin to understand my anticipation, the way I felt from the moment Mario turned the key and the engine purred to life. When he swung into traffic, I hugged myself in the front seat because her face, wanting to see those brown eyes, it was the most amazing thing to look forward to. Going home and being with her, knowing that I had someone at home, waiting on me to get there, someone who I loved so much. It was the best feeling of all.
"You like sitting up front with me, don't you Miss Emma?" Usually Mario and I had our little quirky conversations. He offered a smile in my direction. "I like it too. It makes me feel less like a chauffeur and more as a friend. Whole day I am just a chauffeur, but when I pick you up, I am not only that. But a friend."
"I like that," our eyes met and I smiled at him. "I like that you feel that way."
"I do," he focused on the traffic and reached for the radio knob. "How was your day?"
Kelly Clarkson's 'Already Gone' drifted from the speakers embedded in the doors of the car and my chest suddenly stung. It was because that song had an effect on me. Before I met her, before we kissed, I used to wonder if someone would come into my life and make me become so attached to them, that if we were ever to break up, it would literally drive me crazy. Now that she was in my life, and the other day when we fell out, the song came on on the radio. I sat in the car, with tears clouding my eyes, fearing the worst; that she'd leave me.
"Cat woman is sick," I told him. Ever since he went to collect us this one Saturday from a boutique and she had on a pair of black leather pants with a gorgeous red silk shirt, Mario always called her that when we were alone.
"Oh no," he showed genuine concern. "What is she sick with?"
"It looks like the flu?" I shrugged, "but she thinks it could be pneumonia. And I don't want to think that it's pneumonia."
"We don't want to see the ones we love so sick," his cool manner of speaking suggested to me that he was and always would be a Marine. The wheel was turned slowly. "If she doesn't show any signs of getting better by tomorrow morning, please give me a call and we'll take her to the hospital for a checkup."
"I really care about her, you know? I care so much about her. And I didn't even want to go to work today. But she forced me. It's like, she doesn't understand how much it means, going to work and leaving her home. Plus she sucked up an entire bottle of cough syrup in like four hours."
He chuckled, his Old Spice aftershave tingling my nose in the cool A.C. Mario was like fifty five and so handsome with a full head of gray hair now. I remembered a couple of weeks ago when he was allowing the gorgeous wife he had to die his hair black. But apparently he was fully embracing the gray. With his contacts in, his sharp blue eyes could chill the souls of anyone. But without them, he had a pair of green eyes that were darker than mine.
"Cuddle her up under lots of blankets and make a nice bowl of soup. Feed her," he said softly, tapping his gold wedding band on the steering wheel to Adele's 'Rolling in the deep'. "My wife says that when the cold kicks in, throw it out with a bowl of ice cream as well."
"Really?" I turned to him and smiled. "My mom believes the same thing."
"Yeah, also helps with the internal fever. I've had my share of the flu, horrible times before. If it wasn't for Darla, then I would have died."
"Every time you talk about your wife and I hear her name, I just keep thinking that she's this cute lady like in the movie 'The Little Rascals'. With short hair and a small voice."
"Actually she's quite cute to be honest." He reached below, between us and felt around in the small space under the A.C knobs. I noted the brown leather wallet clipped between his fingers and the flaps were parted. "Here," he held it out in my direction. "The angel on the left flap. The one on the right flap is my daughter Maggie. She passed away from leukemia when she was just six."
"Oh my God, I'm so sorry," my throat ached so much. The picture was studied, and I couldn't believe how perfect a couple could look until I saw the two of them together in one picture.
She was gorgeous, a red head with very short hair, a bit falling into her brown eyes. They were dressed in their Marine uniforms, her hand thrown around his neck. High cheekbones and a small nose, her face narrow. So boyish, she looked in the photo, I thought back on the times he told me about her, how she was so sweet, and was always there now that they were back home together. And I also wondered if she was playful, regardless of the wrinkles under at the sides of her eyes.
"Maggie was Darla's life," he said softly, "and when she died, she started drinking heavy. Somehow I got her together, she sucked it up and went back into service. Came back three months later as strong as ever and I can tell you, for the thirty years we've been married, Emma, there has never been a day since when I stopped loving her. Sure we had our disagreements, but it wasn't major. The one thing couples take for granted is the fact that they have each other physically. They don't realize how lucky they are. Darla and I went months without seeing each other and we still came back and loved more than ever, the actuality of what we had. She's my world."
My chest heaved. I was holding onto the seat under me and after his little speech, I wanted her more than ever now. The traffic whizzed by and the destination grew closer and I did the one thing that even shocked me.
"Hey, take the first right that's coming up," I pointed whilst pulling out change from the pocket on my black jacket. "I need to get something really quick."
Mario turned the car and I showed him where to park, just in front of the 'Green Scene', Regina's favorite spot to buy everything veggie. The place Chad and I took her to get burgers in February; on her birthday, if you can remember well enough. After buying a citrus smoothie, I decided to get a bowl of vegetable soup, even though we had tonnes in the cabinet at home. Choosing to spoil her so much, it made me feel so mushy inside, so, so mushy.
When I did walk through the door, there was Chad, seated on the bare tiled floors, legs crossed like a kid. He was pressing dollar note after dollar note onto the ground, counting his money slowly and I had to laugh.
"Checking to see if you can hit the clubs tonight?" I glanced around the living room and noted that she wasn't in there. "Running short?"
"Oh I'm done with clubbing, sweet cheeks," he said, tilting his head like her and smirking, "I'm so done with Vodka shots, jello shots, slapping strippers with money, lap dances..."
"Right," I went in there slowly, wondering where she was.
"Emma, I'm serious. The dog days are over. I'm going to win Killian back. I'm trying so hard. I want him to see that I'm changing and I can do it. I got this."
"Where's your mom?" I frowned at him.
"Bedroom. Sleeping since three hours ago. Peaceful too. I checked on her constantly and she's sleeping like a baby. She's charging her battery. Fifty, sixty, seventy, eighty, ninety..." he kept on counting.
Resting the bags on the tiled counter, I could feel the mushiness growing warmer inside of my chest as the bedroom was approached. Even as I pushed the door open, and her White Diamond perfume greeted me, it was enough to curl my toes. Can you imagine what it meant to me in that moment to gaze in there and notice that she was hugging my red leather jacket, curled up a comma? Face buried into the insides of my jacket, she sleeping, the rise and fall of her chest signaling to me that it was really a deep sleep. Slowly breathing.
I couldn't remember the last time I had seen her that peaceful.
"Emma," she mumbled, her toes moving under the super huge red blanket that was so thick. The little yellow bunnies that were sprinkled all over the material really made her appear so much cuter.
But she was still sleeping.
So my presence was sensed, or was she dreaming about me?
I tiptoed into the room, and from the time my body was like six inches away from her, those brown eyes fluttered open slowly. We gazed at each other, in the silence within the room, my heart thump thumping fast. Because I felt so complete after all. It was like drawing in a deep breath and feeling the real sense of being alive. Knowing that you connected with this one person and she had become your life.
"I bet that you're hungry," sitting on the edge of the bed, I reached for her fingers and she did the same.
"Yes." Our fingers entwined, and her fever was still evident, those soft fingers warmer than ever. "For you."
"Regina," I stared back, cracking a smile, "all I'm going to give you is lots of cuddles, and kisses."
"Yes, please. Do I have to take a shower? I don't want to." She pouted at me and I found it so cute, my heart did a sighed.
"Hmm, it depends. Lemme smell you first."
"You know that I always smell good enough," she croaked, holding out her arms as I moved in to hug her. "It's like I sweat perfume, as you said. Remember?"
Burying my face into her dark hair fanning out upon the pillow, our cheeks pressed together, I just lingered there. Knowing that we were together finally after an entire day and I needed to take care of her. Staying there as I had been dreaming about for the entire day. With our bodies pressed together, how soft she was, and totally smelling too good, like apples and vanilla, perfume. I ran my fingers through her hair and felt how she was burning up, whether from me being there or the fever, I had no idea but those loving arms wrapped around me.
"Come let me help you up. I'll help you take a warm bath. It'll make you feel a little better," I whispered into her right ear, feeling how she trembled. "Then I have two treats outside, and after that, it's bed time again."
"Do I have to bathe?" her voice was so hoarse.
"Not really but when I was back home, mom used to always drag me out and get me to take a shower. She said that it helps."
"Not unless you take a shower with me."
"I said that I'll help you."
"Please," she held onto me, as I lifted her up slowly and it was then when Chad came to tell us that he was leaving already. He said something about going back to his apartment to study so I thanked him a bunch for sticking around that day and when he left, Regina remained seated on the bed like an obedient child.
Getting her inside the shower was a struggle, because she had become like a baby, never letting me go. Dependent. The red curtains crackled and I helped her inside the tiled square, reaching up high and hooking our towels on the wall. I mean, it wasn't ever something you wanted, to take a bath when you were sick. But it could work wonders, especially if the water was just warm enough. So I set the temperature and smiled as she squeezed into the corner, cupped hands reaching out and under the rain.
"I don't want to wet my hair," she croaked.
"Sure thing." I snatched the green plastic cap and helped her put it on over that head of silky black hair.
Slipping under the shower of water, I gazed at her as she did the same, completely naked, honey colored breasts heaving slowly. And as I stood under there getting myself drenched from head to toe, it dawned upon me that I used to envy women who had bigger boobs than mine. Like, I used to seriously feel bad about my size 32 B babies. But after being with Regina and knowing that she totally loved my body, to a point where my boobs were kissed and cuddled, I developed this confidence. I mean, she had like a 38 B pair of gorgeous orbs and her cleavage was pretty impressive.
Not like me. Even when I squeezed my spoonfuls together, they touched but looked really weird. As if I was trying too hard. So I did as she often allowed me to. I let them hang loose around the house and continued wearing my sports bras. Whatever made me comfortable. I'm not going to elaborate on this but one time I tried on one of her bras and the lace cups just caved in, making me feel like a dude or something. So whatever. Even if I didn't own a pair like hers, at least I had access to hers.
Right?
We used the lime green bath scrunchies to lather each other with lilac scented soap, and I did it slowly. I did it slowly because my eyes were just drinking in every inch of her, and the urge to have our lips meet, it was growing.
"Did you buy my Menthodex?" She was two inches shorter than me and I loved it, those brown eyes gazing up at me.
"I was ordered to, wasn't I?" Her shoulders were taken as we slipped under the showering water, and the suds were washed away slowly. "Do you think that I'll get the flu too?"
"If you do," her face moved closer, "then you must know that I'll certainly take care of you."
Our lips brushed, parted lips, soft and wet from water. My eyes fluttered close because I wanted that. I wanted to taste her. I had wanted to taste and to feel her since my footsteps led out of there that morning. And now it was happening in slow motion. So you can just imagine how the kiss happened, water raining down on us, our hair saved by the caps, heads tilting opposite ways. And when our lips met, I lost my breath. I couldn't breathe at all because her body moved in to press us together. The feeling of warm breasts on mine, our hips fitting together and I kissed her back deeply.
We curled into each other, when she turned around. I held onto her, savoring how the connection felt and knowing that it was intense. The way my fingers raked across her midsection and and cupped those full breasts, feeling how she trembled. Holding onto my wrists and guiding me lower and when I felt how wet she was, the heat radiating from between her thighs, that feeling just drove me crazy. It was like flipping a switch and knowing that something had been ignited inside of me, something more. And I couldn't turn back.
Making love to her was slow and so passionate, my head spun dangerously from the orgasms that awakened both of us. Especially her. Convulsing in my arms, closing around my kinked fingers because she was so tight, so determined though to take all I could give. And I gave her waves of satisfaction that lasted at intervals for about half an hour. Over and over again, Regina went over the edge, grinding herself upon me as I kissed the soft skin on her right shoulder.
"Never let me go," she said softly, half an hour later as I sat on the bed. She remained in front of me just as in the shower. But now we were clothed and under the sheets. Our legs tangled together.
"I wouldn't." My hand guided the spoon of soup to her parted lips and she sucked on it. "That's why I didn't want to go to work today. I wanted to stay here. With you."
"I know," warm fingers closed around my right wrist, as I fed her. She had the citrus smoothie resting on the vanity upon a square of tissue. "I should have allowed you to stay with me but I slept for over three hours anyway. Chad was great company. I listened to him lament on how his actions towards Killian were idiotic. I watched him study and then my eyes closed."
"Are you feeling any better or any worse?" her cheeks moved as she chewed on the softened veggies within the soup.
"Same way. But the pills are working."
I gave her the prescribed medication and made sure that a bottle of water was nearby. The coughing had subdued, as I noticed with some relief. But the fever remained and the sore throat. She also didn't have a runny nose. Good.
The windows were closed, blinds drawn because the last thing needed was a chilly breeze to drift in. Mom always said also, that sweating during the flu was a good thing. To me, I thought about it as our bodies releasing the sickness through our pores. If that was the case, then I was oh so doomed to get the flu soon because she was glued to me. Her skin was slightly damp and I couldn't help it. My lips found their way under her ears constantly as I kissed her over and over again.
"If it worsens by tomorrow, I'm going to take you for a checkup,okay?"
She nodded twice, fingers curling around the red ceramic bowl within her lap.
"Do you still think that it's pneumonia? Like, does it feel that way? I looked it up online today and if it's that, then we should really see a doctor."
"I'm already familiar with a doctor who does house calls. Mark Johnson. Mally's brother. He's right in New York." It was more of a definite choice on her part, over a visit to the hospital.
"So we can call him tomorrow then."
"If my symptoms worsen. Then."
If it was up to me, I would have called him right there and then to pay a visit. It's what happens when someone you love so much suddenly falls sick. The entire world is shadowed by doubts, by worries and your mind cannot be put at ease until that one person gets better again.
"How was your day?" I was asked, the bowl of soup disappearing already, fifteen minutes in.
"Apart from worrying ninety percent of the time over you, it was so dramatic."
"How so?" I handed her the smoothie and she sucked on the red straw.
Another little note to remember when someone you love falls sick is to never pressure them with unnecessary drama. Therefore the real drama at the meeting that afternoon was excluded. To some extent. I basically told her that it went okay but included the part about Butch making his wild comments and the suits growing flustered.
"They're men," she said matter-of-factly, pulling my arms closer around her. "The suits."
"Well duh."
"So why do you refer to them as such? Do they scare you? Because they shouldn't. I've had the good fortune of meeting with them and they're very reasonable men. At best, their knowledge is quite expansive, but they listen to Mally. They trust her."
"I'm not really scared of them," I used my fingers to comb through her hair, raking the strands back slowly. "It's just that they look so professional and like FEDS. You know, coming in and moving through like ninjas."
"One of them was a FED. Charles Norris."
"Chuck Norris' son?" I stared ahead.
"Yes." She sighed and I could already see the eye roll, even though we weren't facing each other. "The resemblance is uncanny. Minus the beard."
"How can he look like Chuck Norris without a beard?" I frowned.
"Emma, please spare me the Cosmo behavior." Her reference to The Fairly Odd Parents really shocked me because I never thought that my time spent in front of the television watching the show ever caught her attention. Or she even paid attention to the cartoon. At least she didn't call me Chrissy from Three's Company.
"Which reminds me," I hugged her tighter and marveled over how she mewled, "have you read Fifty Shades of Grey yet?"
Jackie Collins was one of her favorite authors, coupled with Nora Roberts. Her right hand caressed my thigh and I inhaled. What was the fuss about Christian Grey?
Somehow the question could have come up before, but my mind couldn't stick a pin on the specific moment. On my behalf, the book wasn't my kind of read. BDSM. Was she that kind? To favor hardcore love making? Not so far as we had been together, intimately.
"Reached the second page and realized that I really don't need Fifty Shades of Grey when I can most definitely have one hundred shades of Swan."
I laughed after that, completely enjoying myself. "Fifty Shades of Mills..."
"Yes, yes." Regina actually chuckled within her throat. "Neither does Harlequin novels anymore. Oh the times when I used to pour over those romances. Now no form of plots as those can stimulate my senses because of course, I am quite tangled up in a romance of my own."
"I like crime, gritty mysteries and detective work."
"Intriguing." Our entwined fingers curled up, both of us gazing at the connection. "So tell me, Emma," our fingers entwined and she held them up, "I have never asked this question before because it didn't seem to cross my mind. But why is it that your mother's name is Mary Nolan, your father's name is David Nolan and your name is Emma Swan?"
"I was adopted," I said in a serious tone.
"You were?" her head turned to have our eyes meet. She stared at me. Sometimes I thought that it was possible. Dad nor mom had blonde hair, and only one person in my family seemed to have a head of fair strands. That was one of dad's relatives, a distant aunt or something. So how the heck was I even blonde?
"No, just kidding." I inhaled deeply. "Remember I told you some time before that my dad had a run in with a bad case involving some bad people back in Maine?"
She nodded and kept our eyes connected.
"Well I was in school then. And these people kind of made threats to find us and put our lives into danger. So dad's chief at that time, he had this great idea that I should change my last name temporarily, until the storm blew over. My entire records were changed, with the registry, my birth certificate, school records. I had to learn to write my new last name and handle the kids who made fun of it."
"Swan..." Regina smiled. "I can just imagine the jokes, especially since your hair is blonde."
Raking my fingers through her hair, I pressed a kiss onto a warm forehead.
Lizzie had been one of the people to ridicule my new name. I remembered how it angered me to have my best friend constantly make these little comments about swans. It seemed to me as if everything in relation to her now, every little detail rubbed my heart the wrong way because I couldn't seem to get over what she did.
"One thing happened after the next and then time went by. They weren't convinced enough that these drug pushers were finished, so my name remained the same. Until now. It's still the same and it's on my ID. Not much of a powerful move to prevent them from tracking me but they did it anyway."
"They did what they thought was necessary," she assured me in a soft tone, "and for that, it is enough. We may never know if the name change worked. Perhaps it did. But it doesn't matter to me or it shouldn't to anyone else. After all, I believe that your name suits you. Combined."
"Really?" I studied her face. "How's that?"
"Emma means universal, as you are very open-minded and humane in every regard. If you envision a swan, it is a very beautiful animal that closely resides with its water habitat, signaling fluidity. Your emotions are a constant flow, and at times you tend to be quite peaceful, humble in one attitude."
Wowing me. That's what she was so good at. I could only look at her, speechless.
"When swans are in love, they stay together, seeming to crave a sense of closeness. That's what you desire, don't you?"
"Yeah."
"You also have quite a long neck."
"What."
Her purpose was to make me laugh and I did after a while, feeling my neck just to check if the truth had been spoken. Because sometimes I felt as if my neck was too long. If I shrugged, like really lifting my shoulders, my arms couldn't touch my ears. Okay, maybe it's a weird thing to possibly imagine anyone could achieve but the thought did cross my mind. This is getting weirder. Let's just forget that I made you picture that.
When my cellphone beeped, I didn't pay any attention to it. Until hers vibrated as well. Strange. I reached for both of the mobiles and handed hers over. It was a WhatsApp message, Killian sending a photo to me. So I tapped on it and from the time I did, my eyes widened.
"Well, well, well," Regina said. "What do we have here?"
Killian had sent me a photo with his arm around Chad, the latter beaming at the camera, both their faces a bit flushed. They were touching their bottles of beers together, appearing so happy..
When I checked her phone, it was Chad who sent the photo, captioned 'Guess who hugged me tonight? I feel so special now!'
Honestly my heart literally tipped the scale on growing so mushy in one night. I sat there on the bed, with her in my arms and felt so intense about the photos and the fact that she was there with me and things were progressing for those two. Everything. Mally defending her, to which I'd dish out that part when she was feeling a little better.
Hopefully that would be tomorrow.
"I'm so happy for them," she buried her face into my neck and sighed.
"Queer as Folk was so hot. I need to watch re-runs," I said, staring at the vanity in front of the bed.
"What's that? A comedy?"
The wind rattled the window for a few seconds and thunder cracked above. Woah. Talk about a change in weather.
"It's the male version to The L Word," I said, pulling the sheet over our bodies a little more. "The club music was amazing."
"What's The L Word?"
"Come on, Regina," I couldn't believe it, "don't tell me that you never heard of or saw The L Word. It's impossible."
"I don't watch television, remember?" she croaked, our legs moving together. "It is possible that I have never seen it. What is it about?"
"A group of lesbian friends and their love lives and stuff," I explained, "funny thing is, I always thought that my type was Shane."
"Who's Shane?"
The questions. She could really become like a five year old sometimes, questioning me non-stop until my head cracked open. And the weird part was the innocent look she'd give me, brown eyes wide, fascinated by every single answer.
"Shane's this lesbian in the show that I had a wild crush on. Like I literally dreamed of her doing me. She's a a total dude."
"Google this...Shane and show me her," I was told, whilst she unlocked my phone and opened Chrome. "I'd like to see this person. This...woman."
"Look, you had Julie Andrews and chances are, you still have a thing for Julie Andrews. So leave me and my Shane alone. Besides," I was scowled at, "I don't have urges for her anymore. There's you."
Regina's chest heaved. Whilst I smiled, she didn't.
"There's...me."
"Yeah, unless I'm with a ghost or something then that's weird as shit."
"Why did you say it like that?" her voice was growing huskier. "There's...Shane and then there's...you. Me. In other words, I came along and ruined the fun."
"Regina, you know what I meant."
"Google her."
I did, and her finger hit IMAGES so fast, my heart did a little scream. One picture was blown up, and I was left to stare at the photo of Shane dressed in a tailored black suit, white shirt unbuttoned.
"I'm beyond gorgeous in comparison to this person."
"Vain, much?" I scoffed.
"She doesn't even have my size of breasts, something that you crave for. My hair is silkier and better styled as well."
"But is she doable to you?" I couldn't ignore the fact that her vanity would kick in at certain times but it didn't affect me in any way. In fact, I found her little confident comments to be really entertaining.
"She's not my type." The browser was closed off and Regina locked the phone.
"Dude," I gaped, "Shane is everyone's type."
"Well she's not mine." Curling up on her right side, she hugged me. "You're my type. Always have been. Always will be. I have a thing for blondes." She buried her face into my flat chest.
"I noticed," I made reference to Mally.
"I'm a brunette already. I'm attracted to something different. Fair hair stimulates my senses, more than ever does yours. None compares to yours."
"This blonde mess?" I twirled a few strands between my fingers and she studied my action. "Come on."
"You really have no idea how beautiful you are, Emma. Every inch of you."
"Even my small boobs?" I frowned.
"Yes. A mouthful is just enough. But then again, I'd rather use my mouth between your legs than anywhere else."
"Hey!" I squeezed her as one would squeeze a teddy bear and she let out a forced mewl.
x
A/N - Well that was it. Lol. If there were any mistakes, blame my beta. He's probably taken up with holiday planning. How was it? How do you like the story so far?
