Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VII; Square Enix does. If I did… well, let's just say I think Cloud's prettier than the FF7 girls…

Notes: Once again, this is a double update…

I don't think I've written anything this depressing in quite a while…


I'm Sixteen in my Head

28. Blackout

Slowly, the world comes into focus again, but in a very different way… Rather than outside on a road near Midgar, I am in a small, white room.

I turn behind me…

And am faced with… me?

No, not me… Those eyes are not mine, but they are burned into my soul…

The fake-me tilts its head. "Good to see you… Cloud." And that is not my voice. It's the voice of the owner of those jade eyes.

"You-you're not real."

It laughs… but I can barely hear the sound. "Hoping your memories will not come back to hurt you…?"

It makes me feel like such a child. "SHUT UP!" My body has curled in, my hands now fists.

"Now, Cloud, that is not very polite…" It smirks with my lips. "Would you prefer," it raises an arm identical to my own, "a change of scenery?"

SNAP.

And darkness once again.


Where am I now? It looks… familiar…

CRUMBLE. "AAHH! CLOUD!"

"TIFA!" I turn around to see black hair, disappearing over the side of a cliff. "NO!" I run to the edge, feeling it give way under my weight. I start falling. I can see Tifa… She's not that far from me now.

I reach out. "TIFA! GRAB MY HAND!"

She reaches out towards me. Her fingers touch mine… And fall away.

She reaches the ground… Her body is contorted…

"No…"

… I stop falling, suspended in the air…

I remember where I am now…

Nibelheim.

"Cloud, you have always caused pain for everyone around you." I look up to see the fake-me sitting on a ledge. Its arms were crossed, and a smug look was on its face.

"DO YOU THINK THIS IS A JOKE?"

Its smirk widens. "Of course it is." The doppelganger raises its hand and snaps its fingers.

Blackness falls.


I can't see anything… It's all a green haze… What is going on?

"All right, I've made up my mind!" Not this… Oh, please, not this… "I'll open a shop that does everything!"

My body bounces on the unseen road, but I don't need to see to know what's happening.

"Troublesome things and dangerous things… I'm going to do everything (depending on the reward)."

PLEASE, ZACK… SHUT UP! I try to speak, but I can't.

"I'm going to make a fortune!"

… No… you're not…

"Eh, Cloud… What are you going to do?"

Steal your personality…

"Just kidding… I wouldn't leave you…"

Yeah… Cause I'm going to leave you…

"We're friends, right?"

HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT? AFTER ALL THE PROBLEMS I'VE CAUSED YOU!

"TAKE COVER! CLOUD, LEAVE!"

Bullets launch into my invisible companion…

The mako color leaves my vision. "Zack…" Blood oozes onto the cliff side. He didn't even look human…

"Ha! You should see the look on your face!"

I don't want to look at him… This is all his fault… "Why are you doing this?"

I can feel that smirk returning… "Because you deserve to suffer…"


The petite brunette was slumped against the railing. An amber eye slowly slid open. "... Cloud… I'm glad… I could talk with you one last time." Burgundy liquid dripped out of her tiny mouth.

"Don't say 'last'." It was my voice, but I was not speaking.

Her eye closed once more. A slight smile appeared on her face. "That's… all right… Because of our actions… many…… people died…… this probably… is our punishment…"

"Is that so…?"

"… 'Is… that so'……? Ha…… cool…… as usual… ex-SOLDIER… Always… I liked that… in you…"

Her body slowly stops moving.

"… She was hoping you'd save her."

I shake my head… "People… should know better than to rely on me…"

SNAP.


My eyes open to find the purest creature ever born before me. "Oh… no…"

A small smile is on her praying face. Her eyes suddenly fly open. Emeralds burn into my soul… I lift my head at a shadow in the rafters…

I already know what's going to happen, but I can't take my eyes off the falling angel.

The blade enters her body without any resistance. Aerith gasps, only to fall forward. Her life flows down the blade, her eyes blind to the horror before her.

With a smirk, He removes the blade… I hate that smirk.

"She's dead… because you couldn't save her." I look at my doppelganger. He's perched on the banister of the ancient alter.

"… Just… leave me alone…"

He grins. "Why? This is delightful."

"Cloud? Cloud!"

Aerith…?


My eyes slowly open. I shut them quickly against the bright light… I slowly ease one open. Then the other.

"How… did I get here…?"

I push myself off the flower floor. Just past the doorway as an idle chocobo paces.

… Aerith's church… The only safe place for me…


… If you'd like, please take the time to tell me what you think of this.

I just realized that I'm more familiar with the Japanese script for Advent Children… Weird.