Thank you all for the kind words. I know cliffhangers aren't the nicest, but it needed to be done. This is definitely a little different, and a little more angsty. The secrets may be a little out of character, but the point is that they kept secrets. Hopefully it doesn't turn you guys away :) Thank you again for your kind words and reviews and thoughts and patience. You guys are the best readers ever :) Hope you enjoy :) reviews and thoughts are much appreciated, of any kind.

Beckett reacting to Castle's secrets.


Beckett hadn't bothered with pleasantries with the boys as she strutted into the precinct, cutting straight through the bullpen to the box without a word. She ignored the questioning looks she could feel from Esposito and Ryan. Heat scorched through her, burned in her veins. His words still thrummed in her heart.

Please...walk away...just please don't do this.

She now sat alone in the interrogation room, uniforms having come and taken her suspect. Beckett crossed her arms over her chest, her long legs stretched out in front of her as she stared silently at the wall across from her. She could hear Ryan and Esposito outside the door, their voices tentative as if afraid to disturb her.

Her harsh words for the suspect hung in the room, cornered her despite the open air.

This room…has been my life. My home. And I will not let you sit there and lie to me in my own home.

Home. Beckett let the word roll around in her mouth, her always logical mind shifting through the meaning of the word. Home is where the heart is. She battled with herself, going after the justice she's always longed for and walking away for the future ahead of her.

How the hell could you do this?
Because I love you, Kate.

The night had been too long, too empty without him. She had sat alone for hours, his words echoing around the empty space. Beckett blinked back the furious tears that threatened to overtake her as she replayed their evening.

He'd begged her to go first, to say whatever she needed to say. Beckett had been too scared of the outcome, had pushed him into talking first. The panic in his eyes had caused her heart to thunder in her ears. Beckett had truly only seen Castle worried a few times in their partnership, each a little harder to wrap her mind around.

Castle pulled her out of bed and made her stand in front of her mother's murder board. Castle's voice was soft, hesitant, as he asked her to explain everything that happened, how far they had come-her searching on her own and his research he had conducted. Finally, when she was spent, Castle stepped between her and the makeshift board. Putting himself in the middle of her past and her. She felt the shift immediately, her green eyes darting up to his dark blue ones.

Castle told her everything, the words pouring from him like water from a basin. He had been brutally honest, his shoulders hunching as if ready for the blow of her anger. Castle had walked her through the phone calls he had gotten, the mysterious voice always a step ahead of them. The sight of his tears as he told her that leading her away from her mother's case was the only way to keep her safe had done nothing but fuel her frustration. He was supposed to be her partner.

Her spacious living room got smaller as Castle stared at her, the silence holding the secrets between them. Beckett closed her eyes tightly as she fought the urge to yell, to hurl insults at him without conscious thought. She had come too far to do that.

She forced herself to keep her emotions in check. She tugged her bottom lip between her teeth, ignoring the pinch of pain that shot through her. She finally told Castle to leave, needing to think. She felt the wall build around her heart again at his words, anger laying the mortar between the bricks, in true Beckett fashion.

We were going to have a baby.

The single tear rolled down her cheek now as Beckett sat alone in the box, heartbreak finally getting the better of her. It had just been a routine checkup, following up after her shooting. She'd been stunned when the doctor had told her, never truly thinking of the possibility.

They had not talked about having children. Beckett had never truly considered the notion as she grieved her mother, too absorbed in the loss to contemplate a future. Now, Beckett swallowed the lump of grief in her throat as she thought of how selfish she had been, keeping it from him.

Kate had needed to process before finally telling Castle, needed to work through terror at leaving their child alone. The idea of having a child scared her. She had replayed every scenario of her child being motherless, as she had been. The pain was almost too much to bear. But that was before she considered having a child with Castle.

As she spent countless hours at the precinct, her eyes almost instinctively finding him across the room as he chatted with the boys, Beckett had a clear image of their future. Kate smiled softly at Castle, studying him as he sat down beside her, suddenly seeing a little girl with his ice blue eyes and her stubbornness. She could practically hear their child; maybe a little boy that was a perfect blend of Castle's astounding wit and her sense of humor.

The warmth had spread through her as quickly as the fear dissipated. As she had finally come to accept their pregnancy, had actually come to embrace it, Beckett's world once again rocked for her when she found out there was no heartbeat. She hadn't let herself cry around him, had forced the smiles and light banter. Last night when he'd been so broken up about missed opportunities, Kate couldn't keep the secret anymore.

She tugged on the chain holding her mother's ring out from under her clothes, staring down at the simple memento from her mother. Beckett's sigh sounded loudly in the empty room. She scrubbed at the tear tracks down her cheeks. The ring was a solitary reminder of a past long before she had given and accepted love with Castle.

She wished she had gone first last night.

"Talk to me, Kate. Please. What were you going to say?"
"I can't now Castle. I need some time to think."

Castle's confession had stolen her words, had buried them beneath a grief stricken past. Beckett ignored her own pain she had been struggling with, practically pushing him out the door. They hadn't spoken since Castle left the apartment, the door shutting softly in his face as she whispered she needed time. The tears brimming in his eyes caused Beckett's to well now, pain over hurting him almost too much to take.

Their twin outrage over keeping secrets, the two of them somehow still in sync even in their anger was almost comical. His now reveled, hers buried (something she knew Castle despised) was too reminiscent of life before. Before them, before knowing how good they could be together. Despite the hurt feelings and secrets that had been kept, they were still Castle and Beckett to the core, she thought with a bemused smile.

The day passed her by as Beckett punished herself with her solitude. Beckett's eyes clouded over as she thought of her mother, of the simple Latin words that were etched on the same smooth stone that also bore her mother's name. Vincit omnia veritas.

"Truth conquers all."

Beckett's voice, rough with non-use for hours, sounded strange to her own ears. She felt the familiar smolder of heartache. Her sorrow had been her life for so long. She had lost herself in her mother's murder once before, completely wrapped up in the grief. Before Castle.

She tried to focus on the anger she felt as Castle had tried once before to open her mother's case, his complete disregard for her past. Her righteous indignation was dwarfed by his repentance now, just as it was then. He'd stood by her when she'd fallen off the deep end, let herself get sucked into her job. She could still remember telling him how he made her job better, how much she liked having him around.

Beckett had fallen in love with him long before she had admitted to herself or him. As she stared at the blank walls in front of her, the years of their time spent together in this room flashing through her active mind, Beckett closed her eyes and pictured the exact moment she knew she wanted more with him. At least iit was the first time she clearly acknowledged it within her heart. Castle had handed her a small bag after her apartment had blown up. The sight of her father's watch, fixed and working, caused her heart to stutter to a stop. This was love. This pure simple act without being asked, and without any return agenda, Castle had shown Kate Beckett true genuine love.

Castle had always been the one to see more, to do more for her. He'd always taken a step above what she truly thought possible for them, showing her time and time again how different he could truly be. How the great love stories deserve a happy ending.

He's always been trying to protect you.

The knot of resentment in her stomach lessened slightly as she thought about Castle's actions. His complete devotion to their partnership, to her, despite knowing the outcome, made her ache with need for him. As their relationship had developed, months of learning her mind and body, Castle had continued to show how invested he was in them.

Beckett finally stood, stretching her long limbs. She worked the aches from her body as she wrestled with her choices. The past or the future? She had already made the choice once. There was no way to go back now. Not if it meant losing Castle. She glanced down at her mother's ring one more time before tucking it carefully back under her clothing. Turning to the door, Beckett's mind completely focused on Castle, she stopped short. It was almost as if she had made him appear.

Blue eyes, deep cobalt that shone with his regrets, stared back at her. A cup of coffee was clenched in his hands, Castle's knuckles almost as white as the cup. She blinked rapidly a few times, praying her eyes weren't playing tricks on her. Castle's throat bobbed with emotion as he finally stammered, his deep timbre eliciting a wave of desire to rush through her.

"Every morning I bring you a cup of coffee just so I can see a smile on your face because I think you are the most remarkable, maddening, challenging, frustrating person I have ever met. And I love you, Kate."

His eyes never wavered from hers as he stepped into the room, shutting the door softly behind him. Castle set the cup down on the table, his eyes finally shifting to drift over the chairs they usually occupied when interrogating a suspect. She could see the memories she had spent all day reliving pass through his eyes like shadows before he finally whispered, his voice still loud in the silence

"I shouldn't have kept anything from you. I just wanted to keep you safe. I just…"

He struggled with his words, his blue eyes full of questions and fear. She felt his fear burn in her belly; knew his next words could break them. He could walk away, choose to let her live with her walls. She deserved nothing better, she thought truthfully. He was a better man than she could ever be worthy of.

"You don't let people in. I have had to scratch and claw for every inch. But…every inch has been worth it. We are worth it, Kate. This isn't a choice you have to make. We'll figure it out together. We'll get justice for your mom. It doesn't have to be either or. You can get justice, and be happy. With me."

She breathed out a sigh, for the first time since last night feeling her heart beat steady. Beckett stepped into the comfort of his body, felt his strong arms slide around her waist, holding her tightly. She kissed the base of his throat, knowing they were in the precinct but needing to taste him, before whispering

"Let's get out of here."

Beckett walked away, her hand tucked securely in Castle. Home.