Because you're you-and I'm me
A/N: And the update time is increasing yet again….terribly sorry. I've been ill the last couple of weeks, as I had a friend post on my profile, but I'm afraid if my health doesn't get better the story will have to go on hiatus. :/
Disclaimer: I don't own the vampire diaries.
~VD~
"Damon, where are you taking me?" Caroline giggled, slightly nervous, after a while. Damon still had his hands over her eyes.
"I told you, it's a surprise." He whispered into her ear, smiling. She felt chills go up her spine. When she heard something snap beneath her foot, she grew suspicious.
"Damon, why are we in the forest?"
"Caroline, why are you asking so many questions?" He mimicked her. She rolled her eyes. Then suddenly Damon was gone. At least she didn't feel his hands on her eyes anymore. She blinked. He was standing in front of her, smiling. She cocked her head at him. He kissed her swiftly. She felt something pulse through her.
"à Voila." He smirked, stepping to the side, revealing a huge blanket, with a few candles and food.
"Very cliché." She mused.
"Ah, but you love it." He teased. She looked at him, reprimandingly.
"Of course I do. It's very sweet. What's the occasion?"
"Do you want the truth or the manly version?"
"Is either one of them actually manly?" She asked, amused, pecking him on the lips. He smirked.
"Not really no. Okay, here goes." He took a deep breath, Caroline stared at him, anticipating something cheesy.
"Exactly 5 Months ago was the first time we had sex." He laughed, ducking out of the way of a handful of dirt Caroline picked up to throw at him. She chased after him. He started running, but was soon pinned against a tree by her.
"Vampire strength." He smiled. She smiled back.
"Demon tops Vampire." She growled, throwing him across the forest. He was amazed.
"Interesting. Very interesting. Just wait until I get you though." He launched at her. She giggled, dissolving, and reappearing right behind him.
"Boo." She whispered into his ear. But when he turned around, she was gone.
"This is fun." She replied, looking down at him, from a tree. He jumped up onto the branch next to her.
"Behaving like a squirrel? Yeah, I imagine so." He winked. She playfully smacked him across the chest.
"Having fun. With you." She mused. He put an arm around her.
"So how long exactly can you do….what you just did?" He asked.
"Kind of...since I came back." She said, thinking back. She stared of into the distance, solemnly.
"And...why can you do that?" Damon asked again, more tentavily. She looked at him, her face weary.
"Because the lord in the heavens, if there is one, won't let me be happy." She whispered, tears building in her eyes. She hoped he hadn't heard her, because she only just realized thtat she insulted him with it indirectly, but of course, he'd heard her anyway.
"And why is that?" He looked at her, all humor gone from his face, but instead, he looked very empathetic. She blinked once, a tear escaping her eyes. The following words were dead quiet.
"I just wanted to be human. But I'm not, no matter how much I pretend to be. I'm demonic. I feed on fear of other people, and if that doesn't exist, I'll die. And I hate it. I just...I wanted nothing more, than to finally be rid of Casper. And now that I am, I still can't find peace." She sobbed. Damon said nothing, but pulled her into his arms. They stayed like that until the sun started going down. Caroline had long stopped crying, but Damon was too busy thinking about something.
He couldn't stand seeing Caroline like this.
He didn't deserve her. He really didn't. He couldn't keep doing this to her. If she really loved him, she would turn. He knew that. Would she let him go? No, probably not. She'd sort of indicated towards that.
If she turned, she'd be something she really hated. She wanted to be human. He couldn't take that away from her. He just couldn't. Sure, she wasn't human already, but he already had a plan about that.
"Caroline?" He said, speaking the first word in hours. She glanced at him, her make-up sort of messed up because of her crying.
"Yeah?"
"I think it's time to go home." He mused, stroking her hair. She blushed. She looked down, biting her lip. She looked ready to sink into the ground right about now.
"What is it?" He asked, amused. She looked up at him through her eyelashes.
"I ruined the date, didn't I?" she sighed, embarrassed. Damon laughed wholeheartedly.
"No. No, you didn't." He assured her, pushing a strand of her out of her face.
Caroline smiled up at Damon doing probably the most cliché thing for guys to do. Still, he was incredibly sweet.
"Anytime spent with you can never be considered 'ruined'" he winked. She looked at him in awe. He pecked her onto the lips. She was sure she would melt. He felt guilty. The means of what he'd do would cause her to never forgive him if she found out. He sighed.
"Come on, let's get you home." He said, putting an arm around her waist, leading her out of the forest.
"I don't think there's anyway you could've handled that better." She mused. Damon smiled down at her.
"Glad to hear that, Care."
~VD~
"Do my ears decieve me?" Katherine asked as she entered Caroline's room, who'd just hung up from talking to Bonnie.
"Damon Salvatore being a romantic?" She laughed. Caroline nodded.
"I had no idea he could be so sweet." She sighed, falling back onto the pillows.
"He tends to do that when he's really in love." Katherine mused, falling down next to Caroline.
"Yeah, but it's different now. I feel like he's planning someting." At that, Katherine turned over, fixating her curiously with her brown eyes. She could do this. She could defy what was given to her as a task, right? The opportunity was perfect. She would not hurt Caroline though. She needed to dissappear. Hide herself in a cave until Caroline died a natural death. But she was selfish. She didn't want to have to miss out on Caroline. So naturally, she exhausted all her control. Trying to break, or at least fend off, the compelling urge to do what was ordered of her.
"Why do you think that?"
"He's always been sweet, you know? But today, he just...he went a bit over the top with the sweetness."
"Because he's in love with you."
"Yes, but tonight was different. He was laying it on really thick, thinking I wouldn't notice. I think I did something wrong, and now he's thinking about how to get rid of me." Caroline said gloomly, hugging a pillow to her chest, huffing.
"Yeah, I don't think that's it." Katherine chuckled.
"What else can it be?" Caroline asked, staring past Katherine. She only sighed.
"I'd tell you if I knew anything." She said, sadly.
"I think that's Jeremy. You need to leave." Caroline said hurriedly after a while. Katherine shot up, winked at Caroline, and was gone within a second.
~VD~
"Bonnie." Damon said, knocking on the door to her house. She opened the door reluctantly.
"What do you want?" She asked, studying him carefully. Damon looked completely conflicted.
"I need your help. It's about Caroline." Damon sighed. Bonnie looked up at him.
"Come in then."
~VD~
"How's my favorite sister?"
"Good. I trust you just came over from Elena's?" Caroline asked as she was pulled into a bone crushing hug by Jeremy.
"Yeah. I don't even know why. All she ever does is go on about how I'm such a juvie stoner kid with no future, when she is the one dating a vampire." He rolled his eyes. Caroline giggled.
"And you're dating a witch." She pointed out. Jeremy waved his hand in dismissal.
"Oh pooh pooh. At least Bonnie will age with me." He pointed out.
"What will Elena do? Lamenting all about how she doesn't want to be a vampire, yet she still keeps Stefan around, it's stupid, is what it is, it's..." He didn't get much further, because Caroline had started crying.
"What?" Jeremy asked, clearly not noticing the wounds he'd opened for Caroline.
"I'm just like Elena." She sobbed. "It's love, Jeremy. No matter how much you want to stay away from them, you can't. Because even though they'll occasionally frustrate you to end, they're a source of happiness amongst all the darkness. And that's all anyone wants. I can't let him go, but I don't want to break his heart." She sobbed. Jeremy patted her on the back, siging.
"I have to be crowned the most insensitive wart of the century."
She laughed despite herself.
"You just might be. But you're still my bro." She cuddled into him. He breathed out, relieved. Stroking her hair. They lay like that for quite a while, saying nothing. Caroline had missed him the last couple of weeks.
"You know, I actually can't sleep over tonight."
"What? You been living here for months." She said, looking at him. "I mean, you're never home, but you live here."
"Yeah, but Jenna insists I spend the night at my 'actual' home." He shrugged. She rolled her eyes.
"Okay, might have something to do with the fact that Bonnie's actually home alone tonight?"
"You do know we'd have sex even if she was chaperoned? No, that's nothing to do with it. I fear Jenna and Elena plan an intervention. They don't know I kicked the dealing habit when I got with Bonnie."
"But you still smoke weed and get high?"
"Well, I wouldn't ever want to let you down, so obviously." He winked. "I've been thinking about quitting for good though. I can see Bonnie highly dislikes it. I don't want to make her unhappy. The weed was a rebel phase, and I've grown addicted to it. It's not what I had planned for life."
"Wow." Was all Caroline could say. "That was the most grown up thing I've ever heard you say. I'm proud of you." She said, hugging him. He smiled.
"That means alot, Care."
"But you have to get going." She finished for him. Yeah, I know. Out you go." She smiled at him encouragingly. She could finally go to sleep.
~VD~
"Are you sure this is what's best?" Bonnie asked, sighing. She was displeased about the plan, to say the least. But she wanted Caroline's happiness and well-being more than anything. Biting her lip, she sat down next to Damon, who'd been sitting on the edge of the bed for a while, not saying anything.
"I have to do this. Doesn't mean I want to." He sighed.
"I trust you'll keep your fingers where they are then? You won't change your mind?"
"Yes."
"You do realize she'll hate you if she ever finds out?" Bonnie questioned further.
"Bonnie I have to do this. There's no other way she'll be happy. And it's your turn to assure she doesn't find out."
"Can't you just...Ugh. Alright. Let's go." She gave in. Damon nodded curtly, standing up quickly.
~VD~
Damon stood in Caroline's room, watching her sleep. He felt creepy. He couldn't help himself. Sighing, he whispered her name.
"Caroline." He said. She was awake immediately. After catching sight of Damon, she let out a relieved breath.
"You scared me. What are you doing here?"
"Caroline, stand up. We need to talk." He motioned. He already felt hot tears prickling his eyes. God, how was he going to get through this?"
"Caroline, I love you." He said, holding her shoulders tightly. She looked at him, not understanding why the tears were forming in his eyes.
"I love you too, Damon. You know that. What's wrong?" She asked tenderly. He took a deep breath.
"I love you so much. The only thing I want in life is for you to be happy. I know you could never be happy as a vampire. I know that." He took one hand off her shoulder, caressing her cheek.
"I could never let you turn to be with me, knowing it makes you so unhappy. But I also know you. You wouldn't let me keep you from doing that. But...I can't let you do something that would make you sad, cause I can't stand seeing you sad. I just...I need for you to be happy. That's all I need." He said, crying now. Caroline stared at him, helplessly. She was crying now too.
"So is this it? You're breaking up with me? You think that will not make me unhappy?" She cried. Damon shook his head.
"You're going to be happy without me. And the only way that's going to happen, is if you don't remember what we had."
"What are you going to do? You can't compel me Damon." She said, backing away from him. He was in front of her within seconds.
"I have to, dear. I love you." Then he threw some sort of black powder at her, immbolising her.
"You'll forget we had romantic relations. You'll forget I was ever anything more than nice to you. You'll remember the first night differently. You immobilized me, questioned me, and then we made a mutual agreement to go different paths and accept each other. You don't love me. You barely...tolerate me." He said, choking. "And now you're going to go to sleep and forget this happened." He gingerly kissed her forehead, sobbing. Then, after Caroline blinked, he was gone.
It was all over for Damon now. He was done. He'd live, to protect her, until she died, and then he would take his own life. There was just no other sense.
~VD~
Again, I apologize for the delay, but I can't do anything about being ill. :(
