(28)Kendall

"Oh my god…Kendall?" Logan asked as I walked into the apartment a few hours later. After Ally had left me at the park, I had just sat in the same exact spot I had been sitting in hours before, regretting all that I had said.

"Hey, guys," I greeted dully, slumping into the bright orange couch that I loved. Three pairs of eyes watched my every move. "Where have you been, man? Carlos asked, extremely curiously. "Just been out thinking," I replied, dryly. I could tell that the guys hadn't wanted that kind of a response from me. Perhaps something with more information.

"Did you have to do that all afternoon?" James chimed in from the kitchen. "You seriously missed a lot of school." Logan shrugged. "OK, you did not miss a lot, but come on, Kendall. This isn't like you. Why did you ditch the rest of school?"

I stared at the coffee table in front of the couch. "I really don't want to talk about, ok, guys?"

"Did you happen to see Ally at all? We are expecting her over here, any time," James added. I did nothing but continue to stare at the inanimate object in front of me. "That's why you're upset, isn't it?" Carlos asked, gasping. "You ran into her, and you got into a huge fight!"

All three of them watched my face, waiting for any change in my expression. I finally let out a shaky sigh. "She's trying to decide whether or not to move to New York with Levi…and I made the mistake of telling her to go."

I could see them look at each other with shocked expressions on their faces. They then walked over to me, slowly. "Why did you tell her to leave?" Logan asked, for all of them. "I mean, we're getting a little confused, here. I thought you really liked her."

I turned my head to look at him, and I was sure he could see the pain written all over my face. "I love her, man," I choked out, and I couldn't control my emotions any longer. Covering my hands over my eyes, I cried. Every once in a while, I let out a giant gasp as the tears came, and I sat there for what seemed like hours. I had freaking finally admitted out loud that I loved her.

I could feel a couple hands on my back, and I recognized this action as my best friends comforting me.

I don't know how long we were sitting there, but it absolutely had to be about thirty minutes, at the very least.

I looked up eventually, and Carlos and Logan were both sitting in front of me while James was sitting on the arm of the chair; his hand still touching me.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Logan asked very quietly. I swallowed and shrugged. Carlos and James exchanged looks of extreme sympathy. "So…you got into a fight with Ally…" Logan guessed; it sounding most like a question. I nodded slowly.

"You were jealous…? Of Levi, I mean. Right?" Logan continued, and I again slowly nodded. I knew that I could be truthful with these guys.

"You were so angry and upset that you mistakenly told Ally that you…didn't care about her? And you told her to just go ahead and leave to New York?" I just sighed, now. He was completely and unfortunately correct.

"Do you know for sure that she is going to go?" Carlos asked. I looked at him. "Why wouldn't she, after what I said to her? If I were her, I would be getting my ass on the first plane to New York right now," I said.

It was silent for a moment as the guys thought this all through. "Why were you angry with her in the first place?" James asked, curiously. I shrugged. "I don't know…I was jealous. I saw her and Levi making out, today…so that was why I left school. But Ally claims that Levi kissed her, not the other way around."

"There is a difference," Logan shrugged, but I shook my head frustratedly. "She was enjoying it; it was so obvious! At least, she wasn't stopping him from kissing her!"

All of us sighed in unison. "It's Jo all over again," I muttered, feeling so insanely depressed, it was almost impossible to tolerate. "I'm really sorry, man…" Carlos said. "You've only gone crazy for two girls your whole life, and you lost both of them." Logan automatically punched his arm. "Thank you, Captain Obvious."

James rolled his eyes. "You haven't lost her yet, Kendall. Come on! Get back up in the saddle and call her back." I shook my head. "No. I am done hurting her. I'm never going to torture her with my confusing, stupid life ever again."

I knew all of them wanted to object, but none of them spoke up. At this point, I was done crying over her. I stood up, dead-like, and went straight to my bedroom. I didn't know where Mom or Katie was, but wherever they were, they were do back anytime, I was sure. And I would not let them see me like this.