Two weeks passed quickly, and she found herself remembering more and more about her past after each therapy session with her brother. She also helped him clean up their house as he and Hank recalibrated Cerebro and started recruiting again.

Every night however, she would go to the gazebo to think about him. The more she remembered him, the more she missed him. To her, he was not fundamentally evil but simply had too much hatred inside of him for humanity. He couldn't bring himself to believe in the good of people, and that in time to come, they would accept mutants as well. It could be a result of him personally witnessing how man could discriminate and oppress people of a different race during the Holocaust. So while she understood and empathised with him, it was difficult for her to choose to walk the same path with him, especially not while it was fraught with danger and uncertainty.

She was sleeping one night when she felt a hand touching her face gently. It was enough to make her wake up instantly, and she came face to face with him. He was sitting by the side of her bed, looking slightly mournful and also smiling as she awoke.

"I'm sorry to enter your room like that…I had to see you again. I missed you…" he started to say but she cut him off by embracing him tightly and kissing him on his lips. He never got to say what he had meant to, because they both fell asleep after making love and he was gone by the time she woke up in the morning.

She wondered if Charles even knew about the visitor that night. It felt like a dream to her and made her heart ache even more.

By the end of the month, all her memories had returned and she was glad that she remembered Lorna as well. She thought that she should let him know at the next possible chance that their child had been adopted and was growing up in a less dysfunctional family than what they both could offer. He never returned however and she found herself getting more and more used to being alone again as the days passed.

As such, she spent most of her time helping Charles set up his school and even taught a few of the new students how to control their abilities. Once, she had asked Charles about Logan and whether he would be joining them soon. Charles only smiled and said that Logan would meet them in time to come. She worried about Charles being alone and knew that he felt the same about her own situation.

Her brother attempted to ask her about it one day and she found herself telling him that she wasn't over Erik yet and doubted she could ever get over him even though it wasn't healthy. Charles then admitted to her that Erik had been in touch with him about recruitment issues, and again they had resurrected their former pact on evacuation should either bases get attacked.

"I haven't seen him for a few months. How is he?"

"The same. He asked about you and whether your mind has healed. I told him yes, and also passed him the message about your child Lorna. I could see that he felt conflicted about wanting to see you and also carrying on with his business. He told me that he had also found Lorna but had never spoken or made any contact with the child because of his promise to you."

Upon hearing that, she nodded sadly and tried her best not to cry. Charles patted her shoulder sympathetically and squeezed her hand.

"Would it be better if you went to him again? You were happy with him the last time you were with him. And you left only because you were pregnant. He misses you too."

Shaking her head, she said, "Each time when he leaves for whatever mission he is involved in, my heart breaks. Knowing that he is out there killing innocent people also tears me up inside. I think I am better off not being with him, even though I do miss him."

"I understand…but you need to find someone else to love and to take care of you too."

"So do you dear brother….so do you…."

Charles smiled at her reply and wisely left their conversation at that.

Another year passed and she accepted the fact that she would likely grow old at the Xavier Mansion with her brother and Hank, helping young mutants cope with their powers.

They never saw Raven again either, and sometimes she wondered if Raven had rejoined Erik's cause. She asked Charles about whether he felt the same and he only smiled saying that he doubted it. Knowing Raven, she wouldn't be able to trust a man who had attempted to murder her, even if it was for a greater good.

Their team had grown in number as well, and even Peter Maximoff, the young teenage boy who had rescued Erik from his prison cell, joined them recently. She found Peter slightly intriguing, and confided in Charles that there was something about the boy who reminded her of Erik. She never really figured out what it was though.

Sometimes at night, she would startle in her sleep and look around her, hoping that he had returned. But she would always be alone. She wondered as well whether he had found someone else, and moved on. In a strange way, she thought he deserved a partner like Emma, someone who was able to fight alongside with him and be there for him as well. But he could have formed the view that being in love would only make him weak, and distract him from his goals.

There was a day when she thought she heard his voice inside Charles' study, and she stopped herself outside of the room, contemplating if she should go in. To just see him, talk to him or for other reasons, she wasn't sure. She willed herself to walk away in the end, feeling the heart ache but fully aware that it was the best thing to do. She didn't need him to get inside her head again, to make her leave Charles and her peaceful life, for something that wasn't sustainable in the long run. However, she wasn't able to stay away for too long, and ended up hiding herself around the corner, to just see if it was really him who was inside.

After some time, the door opened and she saw him walking out with Charles. He looked older, more weathered but still had the stern and hardened look in his eyes. Seeing him from afar satisfied her, and she walked towards her room. She thought she heard them mention "Charissa" in their parting conversation but she never turned back.

She turned on the radio in her room, and smiled to herself as she heard the lyrics to a song being sung:

"But of all these friends and lovers

There is no one compares with you

And these memories lose their meaning

When I think of love as something new

Though I know I'll never lose affection

For people and things that went before

I know I'll often stop and think about them

In my life I love you more*"

It summed up what she felt then, that he was the only one in her life that she loved dearly and she thought about whether she would be with him to love him again, once he is at peace with himself. Whenever that would be, only the future would tell, but at least she knew that she was able to move on with her life even without him by her side.

*Taken from Beatles - "In My Life".

...

A/N: This is the final chapter, but I have also written an Epilogue. It'll be posted soon, after some editing. Please let me know what you think of this story so far, thanks!