The Random Megaman Parody Show
By: Metal Sonic EX
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Megaman series. Nor do I own anything else that they might choose to make fun of.
Epilogue
Aftermath
MSX - And… Cut! That's a wrap, folks!
(MSX is sitting in a director's chair and the people from the Weakest Link parody sag their shoulders.)
Megaman (BN) - Finally.
Leviathan - No hard feelings about the harpoon thing?
Megaman (BN) - Nah. Sorry about the pervert thing.
Leviathan - Hey, acting is acting. You were acting, right?
Megaman (BN) - If it floats your boat, babe. -puts on sunglasses and walks off-
Leviathan - Right…
X - -from hole in ground- Can someone help me out now? I can't take Sigma's snoring much longer.
Megaman (Classic) - -from hole- Really? That doesn't sound like snoring. It sounds like…
(A brief pause follows.)
Data - -from hole- Whatever it is, it's driving my nuts!
(A few minutes later, all of the people have been rescued from the hole.)
Wily - So, you were brushing your teeth?
Sigma - Yep.
Zero (Zero, Not X) - Brushing them pretty loud. Oh well. Hey, MSX…
MSX - Ahem!
Zero - (Zero) You were kidding about the second season, right?
MSX - If it floats your boat. Why don't you guys go out somewhere. Celebrate! My treat.
X - Really? Well, in that case…
(X walks off and gives the finger to everyone in the room.)
X - Screw you, assholes! I'm gonna go to 7-11. Get me a Slupee. -leaves-
MSX - Yeah… I hope you choke on it…
Announcer - At the International House of Pancakes…
Megaman - Well, that was fun. Not really. And what's u with the sudden change?
Roll - Sudden change?
Bass - Yeah. In every chapter that we stared in, Ringman was supposed to appear somewhere. In the middle of the season, he disappears and Frost Man begins smoking Woodman.
Frostman - I'm going to counseling for that.
Protoman - Really? Who's the leader… person… thing…
Frostman - Some guy…
Roll - Really? How do you like him?
Frostman - He didn't taste very good.
(A brief silence follows.)
Megaman - You ate him?
(Frostman shakes his head.)
Bass - You smoked him? Like literally smoke him?
(Frostman nods.)
Dr. Light - This is where addiction becomes obsession. That just isn't…
Random Guy - Hi.
Dr. Light - Um… Hi…
Random Guy - Do you like chicken?
Dr. Light - Sometimes. Look, who are…
Random Guy - DO you like chicken-flavored things?
Dr. Light - I guess…
Random Guy - But! How do you know that it is chicken-flavored? How do you know that is isn't something that tastes like chicken-flavored?
Dr. Light - Look, unless you want an autograph or something, I suggest you leave.
Random Guy - Answer the question… Please…
Dr. Light - Ugh! Fine. I know because I've had chicken before. I know what it tastes like.
(A brief silence follows.)
Random Guy - Touché, chicken man. Touché. -walks off-
Megaman - That was… bizarre…
Frostman - I'm nervous now. I think I know him!
Roll - Really?
Frostman - No. I need my fix.
(Frostman grabs Woodman, lights him on fire, and pops him into his mouth. He then opens a large box where two more Woodmen are standing.)
Frostman - I need to go get some more cigarettes. Anyone want anything?
(A long silence follows.)
Megaman - I'll stick with my pancakes. Thanks though.
Frostman - Asshole.
Announcer - At McDonalds…
X - Okay, two double-cheeseburger for me, fifteen for Zero, and a Happy Meal for Axl.
Axl - I'm not a fucking kid, X.
X - Of course you're not. You're a young man now!
Axl - Oh… I so hope you die of a heart attack.
Random Guy - Hi!
(X, in slow-motion, cries out and throws the food into the air. As the burgers fly into the air, Zero, in slow-mo, yells, 'My burgers!')
X - -in normal motion- Holy shit! -gets hit with several burgers- Yeah… Who are you?
Clyde - I'm Clyde. I like potatoes.
Zero - That's good for you. Now, do you want to die now or later for dropping four of my burgers on the ground?
Clyde - You know what I can't stand? Soup! What's the deal with soup?
Axl - Who is this guy?
Iris - Hell if I know.
Clyde - Soup. It's so… watery. Why not call it water with flavor? I mean, you can't even eat it with a fork!
Zero - Look, dumbass. You're supposed to eat soup with a spoon.
(A brief silence follows.)
Clyde - Touché, soup man. Touché. -walks off-
X - Who the hell was that?
Colonel - Hell if I know.
Sigma - Hey, guys.
Everyone Else - Hey, ass-chin.
(Sigma stops and slowly exhales.)
Sigma - The show's over you know.
Axl - I know. But it's a nice habit. I'm gonna keep it.
Sigma - Why, you son of a…
Announcer - At the Olive Garden…
Trigger - Well, doesn't this kick ass.
Juno - Yes. I am not sure who's ass is being kicked, but it is apparently being kicked.
Data - Brilliant deduction, numnuts.
Roll - Why'd we have to pick on Data the whole season?
Tron - Look at him! He's a teacup with legs.
(Data suddenly attains massive weaponry and buff muscles.)
Data - I suggest you take that back.
Clyde - I must report this to MSX…
Roll - Huh?
Clyde - Hi! I like potatoes.
Juno - That's nice.
Clyde - What's up with ice cream? It's cold. It melts. It has 31 different flavors. Why didn't someone tell me that Jesus was back?!
Yuna - Dude, Baskin Robbins is an ice cream place. Everyone knows about it.
Clyde - Touché, ice cream man. Touché.
Yuna - What?
Clyde - Well, I can't say that that was the first time that I said that today.
Sera - Go away. My IQ's been steadily dropping since you got here.
Clyde - Very well. I must report to MSX. -leaves-
Trigger - I'm going to call the Zero series. Tell them what's up.
Juno - You do that. And while you're at it, give this to the waitress.
(Juno hands Trigger a bomb.)
Juno - I asked for breadsticks an hour ago.
Trigger - We've only been here five minutes.
Juno - Oh… I probably shouldn't have activated that then, huh?
Announcer - At Baker's Square…
Phantom - Pie! Glorious pie!
(Zero gets up, stabs Phantom, and sits down.)
Leviathan - Poor guy. It must've been hard for him dying in every one of our parodies.
Zero - He'll get use to it.
Harpuia - Guys, I just got a call from Trigger. Apparently, there's this crazy guy named Clyde walking around bugging everyone.
(Harpuia starts when he realizes Clyde is poking Zero in the arm with a fork.)
Zero - Ya think?
Clyde - Hi. I'm Clyde. I like…
Zero - I like to kill things.
Clyde - Really? What if I told you I was immortal?
Fefnir - I'd say you'd be lying.
Clyde - Uh-huh. Well, watch this.
(Clyde smashes his head on a wall, stumbles around, and spreads his arms into a 'Ta-da!' stance.)
Leviathan - Well, it was special.
Clyde - I can also walk on water.
Zero - Bullshit.
(Clyde grabs a glass of water and throws it on the floor. He walks across it and spreads his arms again.)
Fefnir - I'm ready to kill this guy. Anyone wanna join?
Zero - I will.
Leviathan - Count me in.
Harpuia - -draws swords- You're dead, asswipe.
Clyde - That's no way to talk to Jesus.
(A long silence follows.)
Clyde - MSX wants you back at the studio. Toodles! -hops away-
Ciel - Bizarre.
Announcer - An hour later, back at the studio…
MSX - I have just learned that someone has stolen the season premiere for First Impressions.
Trigger - What's that?
MSX - The name of the show. The Random Megaman Parody Show: First Impressions. By the time I post this chapter, I'll have changed the name.
(MSX holds up a plaster wall and punches through it.)
X - So, what do we do?
MSX - You do two things. You can A.) Find the tape. And B.) Get ready for…
(The door is blown in as the Command Mission cast and the Battle Network series walks in.)
MSX - …Second Offense.
Megaman (Classic) - Wait! -looks back and forth between the Battle Network series and MSX- Second Offense… That doesn't refer to the show does it?
(MSX nods slowly.)
Roll (Legends) - A second season?!
Zero (X) - Someone shoot me now!
MSX - Say hello to your new cast members. They've signed on for a season, which will be called The Random Megaman Parody Show: Second Offense.
Tron - Before I hurl, when is this going to come out?
MSX - As soon as you finish the first parody.
Harpuia - Which is… when?
MSX - Within the week. Now move it! We've got a show to do!
Everyone Else - NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Well, that does it for the first season. I'll post the second one as soon as I can. Thanks to those who read this fanfic and, if you have something you'd like me to make a parody of (I refuse to do Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter), then e-mail (the address is on my profile page) or review me and say what it is. So, until next time, Read and Review and I shall continue to rob you of your IQ points!!
