As always, reviews and constructive criticism are greatly appreciated.
Disclaimer: I am NOT Stephenie Meyer and I don't own any of the Twilight series characters or stories. I borrowed the dialogue and storyline from New Moon, but the rest is my own take on the story, as seen through Edward's eyes.
25. HOME
I paused in the doorway, watching Bella as she slept. Although I knew she was safe, the thought of separating myself from her, even for a short time, was physically painful. I could hear Charlie pacing impatiently in the living room. I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes, mentally preparing myself for whatever Charlie might have to say.
We're here if you need us, Edward. Carlisle's thoughts drifted into my mind as I turned to head down the stairs. Esme and I are here if you need any help smoothing things over with Charlie. We sent the others on to the house.
Charlie's pacing paused as the stairs creaked under my feet. He walked to the foot of the stairs and looked up as I approached. His face was set in a determined scowl and his arms were firmly crossed.
"You, come with me," he said as he pointed to my chest. "We need to talk."
He gestured for me to follow him outside. If you think you're just going to waltz back into her life, you have another thing coming. She may hate me for this later, but it's for her own good. I sure hope she sleeps through this conversation.
I followed Charlie onto the front steps. Emmett's Jeep was gone and I could see Carlisle and Esme waiting expectantly in the Mercedes. Charlie turned to face me as I pulled the door shut behind me.
"Well, what do you have to say for yourself, young man?" he asked in a stern tone.
"I don't know what I can say other than I'm sorry. I know that my family's sudden move was difficult, but…"
"Difficult? That has to be the understatement of the century! Do you have any idea what you did to her? What she's been through since you left? She was completely shattered. You took her out into the woods and you left her there. We searched for hours and she was completely despondent when we found her. She was depressed for months!" he yelled, the vein in his temple throbbing again.
I could see the memories of the time I was away flashing through Charlie's mind. I had seen bits and pieces from Alice's visions, but there was something about the utter despair of seeing it from her father's perspective that made it that much more upsetting.
I looked down at the ground as the flood of memories invaded my consciousness. Of course I knew exactly what I had done to her. She had been just as miserable as I was and I hated myself for it. If it took an entire lifetime, I would make amends. I ran my fingers nervously through my hair.
"Well…?" Charlie asked, crossing his arms and tapping his foot impatiently on the pavement.
I looked up, seeing the hatred in his eyes. "There were circumstances that could not be controlled. It hurt me to leave her as well, but I cannot change what happened. All I can do is promise to you that I will do everything in my power to make it right. I will never do that to her again. I love her too much to hurt her." I tried to impart to him my sincere regret and love for his daughter, but doubt filled his eyes.
Love? You have got to be kidding! Charlie's face reddened, looking as though he was about to explode. "You better believe that you won't do that to her again! I won't give you the opportunity. She was just beginning to put her life back together, to get over you, and you just had to come back. If you think that I'm going to allow you to play with my daughter's heart anymore, well, you think again! You are not welcome in her life, do you hear me? I don't want to see you step through this door ever again!"
"With all due respect, sir, I believe that is for Bella to decide," I replied.
He uncrossed his arms and his fists clenched at his sides. "Then I'll forbid her from seeing you," he shouted as he pointed a shaking finger at me.
"She's my daughter and as long as she lives under my roof, she will obey my rules. And if that doesn't work, then I'll send her to Florida to live with her mother." His voice was beginning to waver.
Just leave. Please, just leave and don't come back. You're no good for her. She was finally happy again. Why did you have to come back? I can't see her like that again. I just can't.
I could feel the color drain from my face, if that was even possible. I was at a loss for words. Charlie was right that I was no good for her, but that didn't matter anymore. I loved Bella with every fiber of my being and there was nothing I could do to change that. I believed that she loved me too. If she asked me to go, I would do that for her, but I would let her make the choice. I would be damned if I allowed Charlie to make that decision for her.
I cast a fleeting glance at the Mercedes, catching Carlisle's eye. Charlie looked up as the doors opened and Carlisle and Esme stepped out. He glared at me and looked to my parents as they approached.
"Charlie, it's good to see you again," Carlisle greeted, holding his hand out. Charlie shook it and nodded.
"Dr. Cullen, I think we need to talk about this situation."
"Certainly. Edward, would you mind taking a walk so we can have a talk with Chief Swan in private?" Don't worry. I think I can diffuse the situation. He's too angry right now to have this conversation with you. Stay close.
I nodded and turned toward the forest, trudging slowly with my hands in my pockets. I could feel Charlie's eyes burning into the back of my neck as I walked away.
"Why don't we go inside and sit down? Would that be okay, Charlie?" Carlisle asked, his tone soothing.
"Yeah, come on in," Charlie replied.
I listened to them enter the house as I walked. I turned the corner and when I was sure that they were inside, I deftly climbed the tree next to Bella's bedroom window. I slid my fingers under the window frame and lifted. Thankfully, she had left it unlocked. I opened the window and slid into her room silently.
She lay on her side, her chestnut hair spilling onto her pillow, framing her face. Her lips curved in a slight smile as she slept. Her face was so peaceful. Her even breathing and steady heartbeat were music to my ears.
I sat in the rocking chair and closed my eyes, listening to the conversation downstairs.
Through Carlisle's eyes, I saw the concerned look on Esme's face as Charlie paced back and forth in front of them. He was visibly shaken, but trying to control his temper in front of Carlisle.
"Charlie," Carlisle began. Charlie paused briefly and faced Carlisle. His eyes were weary and his face drawn. He lifted a can of beer from the coffee table and took a sip.
"Charlie, we had no idea how things would turn out when we moved. I was offered a very lucrative position at a hospital Los Angeles and we decided to accept it. I hated the idea of uprooting my family so suddenly, but with such a large family to support, I felt it was prudent not to turn it down. I'm sure you can understand that," Carlisle lied smoothly.
Charlie ran his fingers through his tousled hair and took another sip of his beer. "Of course I don't fault you for moving. You have a family and you have to do what's best for them. I get that. It's the way your son left my daughter that I have issue with."
"He feels terrible," Esme interceded. "If it's any consolation, he was absolutely miserable from the moment we announced the move. I've never seen him so upset."
Charlie harrumphed and rolled his eyes, beginning his pacing once again. "If he cared about her so much, why did he just leave her? There were no phone calls, no letters, no e-mails…nothing. If he missed her as much as you claim he did, why didn't he try to contact her?"
"We are partly to blame for that, Charlie. We felt it would be easier for the both of them to move on with their lives if they didn't remain tied to one another. We've seen with our other children that long distance relationships are often more difficult to handle than a separation. We felt a clean break was best."
"Alice tells us that the separation was very difficult for Bella," Esme added. "We are so sorry to hear that. You know how dramatic teenagers are; everything is a matter of life and death to them. We had no idea Bella and Edward felt so strongly about one another."
Charlie shook his head in frustration. "Anyone could see how crazy they were about each other. It concerned me quite a bit. They're too young. They've barely experienced life yet. It takes maturity and wisdom to really understand what love is."
Carlisle nodded his head in agreement. "You're absolutely right, Charlie. They are young and often young love is fuelled by hormones more so than intellect. However, we feel that forbidding them to see each other would be a mistake."
Charlie paused and his mouth gaped slightly as he stared dumbfounded at Carlisle. "What do you mean?" he asked.
"Raising five teenagers has been a challenge," Carlisle chuckled slightly, patting Esme lightly on the knee. "But one of the things we've learned is that when you make something forbidden to them, it only serves to make that thing more desirable. If we tell them that they cannot see each other, they are likely to continue to do so in secret. I, for one, like to keep a close watch on my children and would prefer that they maintain an open and honest dialogue with us. I fear that if we label their relationship as taboo, then they will merely sneak around and a pattern of lies and deceit will begin."
Charlie stroked his beard as he thought. He's right. As much as I hate to admit it, he's right. Bella is headstrong and I know that if she wants to see him, I won't be able to stop her. I can't watch her every minute.
Charlie let out a defeated sigh. "I just don't know what to do. I've never seen Bella so broken up about anything before. She was depressed for months. She stopped speaking to her friends, she barely ate; she spent most of her time moping around in her room. And there was nothing I could do to help her. She was practically catatonic. If you ask me, it's not healthy. No one should be that dependent on someone else. Honestly, she was acting less like she was suffering from a breakup and more like someone had died." Hell, she was acting just like I did when Renee left me. It breaks my heart. I want to protect her. I never wanted her to experience a loss like that. She and I are so much alike. I just don't know what to do. I don't know if there's anything I can do.
Carlisle stood and placed a comforting hand on Charlie's shoulder. "As difficult as it is, I think we need to let them figure things out for themselves. I can assure you that Edward feels very strongly about Bella. Your description of her reaction to the separation isn't that dissimilar from Edward's. They may be young, but I believe they are truly in love. Unless we want to lose them both..."
"You're right," Charlie interrupted. "I hate to say it, but you're right. If we force them apart, I'm afraid they'll just run off together and we'll never see them again."
"You're making the right decision, Charlie," Esme encouraged, smiling up at him. He smiled feebly in return.
"So, does this mean you're moving back to Forks?" he asked, changing the subject.
"It's a possibility," Carlisle replied. "We found that we missed the quiet of Forks. A large city like Los Angeles really didn't suit us very well. But we have to discuss it as a family first and I would have to speak with the hospital. If the town will have us back, I feel pretty strongly that we would like to stay."
Charlie nodded and took Carlisle's hand as he offered it. They shook hands and Charlie stiffened awkwardly as Esme reached out to hug him. Carlisle looked on in amusement.
I crossed the room to Bella's bedside and bent to kiss her softly on the forehead. She smiled faintly and snuggled deeper into her pillow.
"I'll be back soon." I promised. Then, I noiselessly leapt out the window and sprinted toward the forest.
"Edward!" I heard Carlisle's voice calling from the house.
I jogged from the tree line back to the house. My parents stood hand in hand at the foot of the stairs and Charlie stood on the porch, holding the doorknob with one hand while the other was shoved in his pocket. I caught the glare in his eyes as I came into view. If you hurt her again, so help me…
"Come on, son. It's time to go," Carlisle instructed. Just play along, Edward.
"But..?" I began.
"Edward, we need to have a family meeting. Let's leave Chief Swan and Bella alone for now. She needs her rest and I imagine they have some talking of their own to do." Carlisle and Charlie exchanged a look of understanding.
Playing the part of the upset teenager, I looked down and shuffled my feet. "Will I be able to see her later?" I asked.
"We'll talk about that. Come on, now," Esme said, reaching out for me. She wrapped her arm around my shoulder and led me to the car.
"Thank you for your time, Charlie. We'll be in touch." Charlie nodded and watched as we climbed into the sedan. He stood and watched as we drove away before finally going back into the house.
"Thank you," I said as we drove.
Carlisle nodded and Esme turned to smile at me. "Everything will work out, Sweetheart. For now, let's just go home. Don't worry; I'm certain that Bella will be asleep for quite some time. And we need to allow her some time alone with her father."
I watched the blur of trees pass by as we sped down the winding road to our home. My thoughts were only on Bella. After months apart, even this brief separation was agonizing for me. I clutched my arms to my chest, the familiar aching sensation returning slightly. I pushed the thoughts away, instead filling my mind with the recent memories of Bella; the way she felt in my arms, the sense of complete joy when I realized she was alive, the feel of her soft skin as I pressed my lips to her forehead.
I opened my eyes to see our house approaching. All those months ago, I believed that I would never see our home again. This was the first house that truly felt like a home to me. Forks was the first town that felt like home. It was all because of Bella. When I was with Bella, I was home. She was the piece of my life that had always been missing, like an incomplete jigsaw puzzle, she completed the picture.
Rosalie sat on the hood of her BMW, wringing her hands, as we pulled into the garage. She looked up at me, her eyes filled with regret. I could not bring myself to go to her, not yet, but I smiled at her as I rose from the car. She returned the smile and hopped down from the hood, following us into the house.
As soon as I opened the door, Alice bounded forward and wrapped her arms around me. I took a step back, jolted by the force of her embrace. "I'm so happy, Edward! Everything's going to be just as it should be!," she squealed.
"Don't get ahead of yourself, I still haven't had a chance to speak with Bella," I replied.
Alice grasped my chin between her slender fingers and smiled. "Silly, silly boy," she scolded, tapping her other finger on her temple. "I don't need to wait for that. I can already see that everything is going to be wonderful. We're all going to be together again, and Bella too! Oh, I can't wait!" She clasped her hands together and I couldn't help but laugh.
I looked around at the faces of my family members. They were all beaming. I had expected some anger and hurt after my departure, but they all seemed genuinely happy just to have me back. Their thoughts were full of love and relief that the entire ordeal was finally over.
I felt a slap on my back, "It's good to have you home, bro. It just wasn't the same without you," Emmett exclaimed. There were murmurs and nods from the rest of the family as they shared in his sentiment.
Esme's slender arm slipped around my own and she pulled me with her toward the couch, motioning for me to sit beside her. We sat in silence for a moment as her fingers traced my weary face. Her palm pressed against my cheek as she looked into my eyes.
"Sweetheart, are you alright?" she asked as only a mother could.
I nodded. "Yes, Esme, I'm fine. I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am for what I did to you, to everyone." I paused, glancing around at the faces of my family. "It was selfish of me and all I can say is I'm sorry."
She shook her head, "No, sweetie. Please, don't apologize. You did what you needed to do. We all understand that. We're just happy that you're safe and you're home."
Carlisle stood behind Esme, his hands on her shoulders. I looked up at my father, expecting to see shame in his eyes, but all I found was compassion. He understood my pain, he saw my agony, and he supported me through every decision I had made, whether he agreed with it or not. And there he stood, his eyes full of love for the son who finally returned home. We exchanged a smile, seeing the understanding in each other's eyes.
"So, is there really anything to discuss or has it already been decided?" I asked, looking around the room at the faces of my family.
"It seems as though the decision's already been made," Carlisle replied, gesturing to Alice who continued to bounce with excitement. He chuckled at her enthusiasm and we all soon joined in, the room filled with the sounds of laughter.
"Come on, Eddie," Emmett bellowed. "Let's go find you some mountain lions." He grabbed my arm and began pulling me to the door. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Alice skipping down the hallway, humming to herself. I wondered what she could be blocking me from seeing, but dismissed the notion quickly.
Emmett looked back at me as I didn't move. "Come on man, you have got to be starving."
"Actually, I'm fine. It can wait. I'd really like to get back to Bella." He gave me a surprised look as I glanced sheepishly back at Carlisle and Esme.
"You sure?"
"Yes, absolutely," I smiled.
Carlisle nodded, and with that, I was out the door and running through the forest. The cool air felt wonderful on my skin. I knew that I should be thirsty, but my need for Bella overrode everything. I knew that I should be weak, but being with her made me feel strong. I ran as fast as my legs could carry me and, within moments, I was at her window.
Climbing in, I let her aroma wash over me. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, smiling at the familiarity of her scent. Silently, I crept to her bedside and lay down. I wrapped her in my arms and even in her sleep, she nestled into my embrace. I kissed her forehead lightly and closed my eyes. I was home.
Thanks to everyone who has reviewed. Your words of encouragement are invaluable to me! And thanks also to everyone who's voted for me to continue Edward's point of view with Eclipse. If you haven't reviewed or voted yet…I would love to hear from you!
