Hello, beloved readers.
Merry belated X-mas and Happy New Year in advance.
As promised, here I am to update this story. It was a quite difficult chapter to write, but I finally manage to finish and update it. It will also be the last update of this year (don't you say hehe), but I think I manage to update quite a lot 2016, don't you think? I have posted 16 chapters. Well, more than I thought and more than I usually update if we are to be fair here.
Well… see you in the 2nd A/N.
This chapter is plot based, but there is quite a handful of ByaRuki interactions. Hope you enjoy it!
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, but I own this plot.
Chapter 28. Three Scars
"Dear Diary, I am no better than the Duke… No. He is certainly far better than I am."
"You must tell him," the Duchess said, her cat-like eyes thoroughly focused on the nervous girl pacing all around the drawing room.
"No!" Rukia let out, biting her lips and crumpling her mousseline pink dress. "No… I mean… I can't."
There was silence for a moment, as if Yoruichi was choosing her words carefully. And she was, for depending on what she said, she would drive the young Duchess even more nervous.
"I know you are afraid…" she started softly, her hands shooting to stop Rukia from pacing. "But you have to tell him. It's important to him as well. Whatever you may have done in the past, he will not judge you... harshly."
"You offer little comfort with such words."
Yoruichi chuckled.
"I do know that, young lady. It's just he is your husband, you chose him."
Rukia fell down on the couch, her hands still clutching the fabric of her mousseline dress.
"I did not know where I had my head when I decided to marry him."
"Well… I do know where he had his head when he made you accept his proposal."
Her words, followed by a long and delighted laughter had Rukia blushing all over. She covered her face with her hands and wondered why she decided to talk about that morning to Yoruichi of all people. And to think she did not even tell the whole story…
A groan of utter despair left her lips.
Did the Duchess really need to turn everything into something unsuitable to be discussed over tea in the middle of the drawing room with servants coming back and forth?
"Listen, girl…" Yoruichi started, picking up her cup of tea. She brought it to her lips and inhaled the hot steam. "The key to a successful marriage is to be open to each other and to hold no secrets. At least not too many." She winked mischievously. "A woman has to have her secrets."
At her words, she looked down for a moment, worry eating her alive. The problem is that they had too many secrets, since the beginning and Rukia could not even begin to tell him some of them. He would surely ask for the annulment of their marriage. While she was not afraid to be cast out, to be alone and poor again, she could not think of a life in which the Duke hated her.
The mere thought made her heart become little and sore.
"So you are going to tell the Duke what happened."
It was not a question, rather a statement. She did not know if she was content the Duchess could be so open in her marriage or if she was worried about her confession getting spread, even if she was not telling everyone, Rukia felt quite exposed already.
"Probably." Yoruichi shrugged. "But worry not, he is not going to tell Byakuya-boy."
Should she feel relieved…?
She did not really know how to deal with the Duchess and her comments.
"In your place, I would tell him Hisagi is dangerous and what you saw in your memories."
"He is going to kill me if he knows I went to a hypnosis session with Doctor Ran'Tao again…"
"Well…" The Duchess leaned towards her to whisper, "he doesn't need to know how you recovered such memory."
Rukia even opened her mouth to say something, but the chuckle Yoruichi let out made her sigh.
"A woman has to have her secrets. I get it."
There would be complete silence if the other woman did not continue to chuckle, a mischievous glint in her eyes.
Rukia looked down, not really sure of what to do. Actually, she was so desperate when she recovered such memory early in the morning, the only thing she could ever think about was to go to the Duchess' house and seek her advice.
It was so early everyone was still sleeping, including her husband back at her own home, but she could not go back and face him. Instead, she asked a servant to give the Duke a note from her, in which she explained she was at Yoruichi's home.
He would be displeased, he did not like her friendship to the Duchess — he thought she was too much immoral for his liking and would somehow change her. As if he was not immoral enough, talking to his butler while making her touch herself —, but at least it was better than letting him know she was with Doctor Ran'Tao.
While Rukia was nowhere close to let herself be commanded by him — she made it clear enough he was not her owner —, she did not have it in her to argue with him about her whereabouts and his expectations of her at the moment.
And now the Duchess suggested she told him what she recalled.
To tell him Hisagi was supposed to be dead.
Technically, she killed him.
That he was sided with the enemy. But which one…? She did not know it. She knew so little about her past and knew even less about his past and his role in the War.
His role now.
To tell Hisagi was the enemy was the same to admit she knew everything about the notebook and that she had been lying all this time to him.
Not lying.
But omitting.
She really had no idea how to deal with it.
"Listen," Yoruichi started once again, noticing her blank expression. "Go home now. Do tell him or not, it's your choice, but mark my words, the longer you keep it from him, the worse."
"I know…"
"He is a stubborn boy with trusting issues. He may trust you right now, but if you keep it too long from him, he may never trust you once again. And only God knows how he can be a pain in the ass when he makes his mind."
"I know…"
I know…
###
Earlier that morning…
"Tell me what you see, Lady Rukia." Doctor Ran'Tao's voice echoed in the room.
There was no answer, a mere hum left her lips, but that was the only noise the Doctor heard for a while.
She should not have listened to her pleas. The Duke made himself clear when he stated she was not to help his wife recover her memories anymore. He gave no plausible justification, but he never did before. He merely expected to follow his orders without questioning his authority.
When the Duchess knocked on her door very early in the morning, Doctor Ran'Tao did not know what to do. However, as the young woman begged she had no other option left besides helping her.
Now she was lying in the ottoman of her office in a half awake state, completely locked in her mind.
"Tell me what you see, Lady Rukia." And then she was firmer, "Now!"
A struggled moan left the Rukia's lips. Her face indicated that the memory was quite painful. She could not only know if it was emotional or physical.
"There is a man... He is trying to rape my sister and..."
There was silence for a moment. The Doctor thought she would resume telling her what was inside her mind, but it did not happen.
"And?"
"And... I killed the other one."
This time the one who could not speak was the Doctor herself. She was shocked and her usual calm, kind eyes widened in response.
"Why did you kill him?"
"Because he tried to kill me first."
As she clutched her own throat, the small cut that graced the otherwise soft skin, Ran'Tao realized it was better to wake her up. Any minute spent inside that disturbed memory of hers could make the damage irreparable.
"That is enough for now, Lady Rukia. When I count to one you will wake up, okay?"
There was no response, but as soon as she murmured the words, Rukia opened her eyes and looked at her.
They stayed silent for a moment, neither willing to speak. The preceptress knew Lady Ran'Tao would not overstep her boundaries and ask more, but still she felt suddenly aware of her condition now.
She was not just someone who stole to give the poor, someone willing to break rules. She was a killer. She killed people.
How many lives had she taken? How could she do that? Even if Hisana and her were in danger, even if she knew he was trying to kill her it was their duty to find another way, right?
"It was not your fault..." She was startled when the Doctor's hands touched hers lightly in a reassuring gesture. "Don't overthink it. Give it some time, right?"
No word left her lips as she nodded.
All she wanted was to go back and see a little bit more. At least see the face of the man she killed. All she could remember were three scars on his face and a knife tightly pressed against her throat.
Her hand flew to the small cut on her skin. Her eyes widened.
So that's how I got it.
"Lady Rukia?"
A small smile touched her lips, but not her eyes as she replied, "I am fine... Thank you for today. The Duke won't ever know I came here."
"But the carriage..."
"I came in a 't worry. I have to go back now. He is probably sleeping, so if I arrive soon, he won't even notice I was out."
Both knew it was not really a probability, but Doctor Ran'Tao was not worried for herself, what bothered her most was the state of Lady Rukia's mind after their sessions.
Am I doing what is right?
###
"I hope I am not disturbing you." Her voice was low and he would say somehow sheepish as she knocked on his office.
Byakuya was currently focused on replying some missives, most of them related to urgent state affairs — which were none of her business nor he did want her to know about it —, but there were others he did not have time to come across yet, but seemed of a much more personal nature. One of them was quite intriguing, signed by Captain Ajit. Even if he had no clue on who this Captain was, he was aware such Indian name could be somehow related to Hisana.
Even so, he did not think about dismissing her.
At the moment, he was more interested to know where she went that morning. Even if there was a note left to him, the Duke was somehow not that inclined to believe it. Although he did not think she would reveal herself so easily, she was no greater liar either. And he was very much curious on what she had to do at Yoruichi's house so earlier in the morning.
There were two reasons that made it all suspicious. First, there was no such urgent matter that would make her leave the comfort of his arms before seven and second, he could not fathom the need to hire a remise if she could easily ask any servant to guide her there — if she was not comfortable with Hisagi, it is. He surely thought she would not be after their interlude in the carriage — or ride a horse herself.
Placing the documents he was working on back in the first drawer, he ordered, his voice deep and emotionless, "enter."
A few seconds passed by before the door was opened and the petite figure of his wife stepped in. Her raven hair was somehow messed and her mousseline pink dress stained with dirty with mud.
He narrowed his eyes, but did not voice anything. If there was mud in her clothes, it could only mean she did not go only to Yoruichi's house. And as far as he was aware, it did not rain last night. The mud stains made no sense at all.
"Rukia."
His deep voice made her look at him at once, her usually doe eyes were quite opaque as she focused her violet orbs on his gray ones. Her face was quite pale; her hands were trembling a little.
"Are you fine?" he asked, concern filling his voice.
"Y-yes."
"Rukia." He walked to her, removing her hands from the already crumpled dress.
"I am fine…" She leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist. A tired sigh left her lips. "It's just my head hurts."
The Duke embraced her back; the crown of her head barely reaching his chest. He mused how perfectly she fit into his arms, content to be holding her.
"Did you take your pills?"
She nodded.
What made her head hurt the most were not only the pieces of memories recovered both in the Doctor's company and then on the remise — when she told Lady Ran'Tao she would be returning home, it was what she really had in mind, however, as soon as entered the hired carriage, she could not stop the images from returning to her torrentially. In her current state, she could not return home, definitely not — but the fact she was lying, hiding actually, such piece of information from her husband.
She wanted to talk to him. To tell him the truth. Yet… yet she was afraid. If she told him she was the translator since the beginning perhaps she would not find herself in such a difficult position right now.
However, there was no guarantee he would have accepted her before and not used her blatantly. He was a Duke after all. Part of her, the dreamer and romantic half, told he was in love with her, that's why they got married. The other half, nevertheless, the realistic part, assure her he did it only because she was his promised bride.
If he knew now she lied all this time how he would react?
"I am sorry I left so early," she said. At least this much she could do, right?
Byakuya stiffened at her words. He released her from his arms and walked back to his desk. She followed him, standing in front of him, almost sitting on the wooden surface.
While he detested such gesture, Yoruichi seemed to enjoy sitting on places where she was not supposed to, but he held little complaints when it was related to Rukia.
He did not say anything, he knew she would continue to explain herself and when she last expected, she would let out some information that did not match the minimum the rest of her story. And he would know she was lying.
The Duke was trying not to get paranoid, but she was proving it quite difficult. At first, she visited Ishida and now she visited Yoruichi early and someone else… Because there had to be someone else.
"I had some questions to ask her."
"About…?"
"Us."
He looked at her. Her flushed cheeks made him question himself if she was either embarrassed or lying. He concluded it was the first.
"I have already said I…"
"I know you can answer my questions." She sighed, thoroughly ignoring the harsh look directed at her for having interrupted him. "But there are some of them I feel like I should ask a more experienced woman."
Byakuya remained quiet. He was suddenly curious on what she had to consult Yoruichi about. Yet, it did not explain the time she left and the fact she hired a coach. He would not press her, for he knew she would not reveal anything and for part of him told he was completely paranoid.
A woman with a lost memory offered little, almost to zero threat to him.
Nonetheless…. It did not help everything announced a big treason coming from those around him. Hisagi, the Mad Pirate, Lord Louisenbairn, Hisana… And perhaps his wife too.
In a foul mood, he retrieved the documents from his first drawer and returned his attention to them. He did not miss her curious look at the missive signed by Captain Ajit.
Without shifting his attention at her, he asked,
"Will that be all?"
Rukia bit her bottom lip. He was giving her the chance to be honest, to tell the truth, but telling the truth after so many lies was not so simple. It was quite difficult, actually. She wanted to tell him, she really did, but she had no idea how to start.
Would he accept her apologies?
"No."
"You are dismissed then."
He did not have to look at her to know she was completely irked at his words. And if not for the fact they were already married, she would probably call him out on his antics.
Byakuya would not admit it loud, but part of him missed her uncaring behavior when it came to him.
"Rukia," he called, his voice deep and emotionless. She was looking at him, her expression almost hopeful, "do not expect me for lunch."
"Y-Yes." She bowed, her eyes focused on the floor as she added, "Your Grace."
###
Her father was dead.
And she did not have time to cry over his corpse.
It did not matter she tried to wake him up — for there was no way a father could die when his children still depended on him —, her big sister yanked her from the bloodied body and looked for a place to hide.
There was not many.
They killed their father and would kill them if given the opportunity.
There was just so long they could hide and then they had to leave. Leave and hide again. Seek refuge for her and her older sister. Hisana was weak, she had always been, so there was no way they could survive if they did not find shelter and someone to protect them.
Her father did not say who, but she was sure there was a man from England coming for them. She did not recall his name, but he was the grandson of a close ally of his father. And also supposed to marry Hisana as soon as they set foot in English soil.
He was late though.
Or perhaps would not come, which, frankly she would not judge him. They were betrayed. Her father was dead now because of betrayal. She did not know who, but right now they could not trust anyone.
With Hisana's frail condition, each step should be carefully planned, but Rukia at the tender age of 13 years old knew very little about her father's traitors.
She had been taught to fight and to translate the damned notebook, not to recognize the entire organization behind most of War Crimes.
While Hisana knew how to defend herself as well, but her usually fragile body allowed very little. It did not matter that much, for if their savior really came to their rescue, she would have no need to defend herself. At least Rukia expected him to be a capable fighter.
She even thought about running back to her father's dead body and get the wooden box with the notebook, but she knew she had but two choices: leave with her sister or retrieve the notebook and die.
Hisana did not allow her to. They had to escape and time was against them. Next thing Rukia knew, they were running the alleys of Valencia in search of a safe place to hide, their home was surely not among of them.
Rukia looked behind once more; part of her felt her father was still alive, some part that foolishly clung to happy endings or whatsoever, but the survivor in her said it was futile going back, for he there was nothing to return to.
Hand in hand, both sisters ran to an abandoned loft house in the middle of the old center of Valencia. With so many people living in the streets and the river across the exit, she was sure people would not look for them there.
Hisana could not walk that much either, they went through a lot for one day. It was time to stop.
Stepping in front of her older sister — an act sweet and caring Hisana always reprimanded her for —, Rukia opened the door, only to be surprised once again by a man supporting a huge reaping hook on his back. His face was smooth, no marks graced his skin.
Needless to say she knew his name and feared the encounter very much so.
"Lord Hisagi…"
###
Rukia woke up alone in her bed, forehead glistening with sweat. She blinked furiously and tried to return back to her dream state to no avail.
Banging her head against the pillow, she closed her eyes, but there was nothing. Only darkness. No trace of the fucking dream.
She touched again her own scar and recalled who was the one who carved it on her skin. It was not really a problem, for she gave him those three scars covering the right side of his face. The 69 tattoo, however, was a mystery.
It all made sense now. The dream she recalled umpteenth times, the memory — it was not a dream, it was a memory of a very painful past — was related then to Hisagi. But who was the other man? The one who had his face burned by Hisana? Was he alive as well?
Actually, she was trying to understand how Hisagi was still alive and well… breathing still. If only for falling over the mirror pieces, he could be alive, but after having his abdomen pierced by one of those bars, there was no way he could live.
Witchcraft?
There was no other explanation.
Not plausible at least.
Bracing her legs and tucking her chin over her knees, Rukia gazed at nowhere.
No matter how much she hated what Hisagi represented — for he was surely a part of the scheme that killed, or rather tried to, kill her father at first and did not succeed —, she could not deny he was as young as her. When they fought he was maybe older than her by two years, three at most.
A fifteen or sixteen years old boy. A child.
Their lives were so messed up because of the War.
She wondered if he hated her for almost killing him — again, how could he be alive? —, for she could not bring herself to hate him, instead irrational fear irradiated over her whenever she thought about him. Perhaps she hated the fear she felt of him.
At least, no matter how many answers the recovered memory left her with, it made some sense. It justified why she could not help herself but feel afraid of him.
Sighing, she left her room and walked towards the Duke's study. Each servant she found in the corridors bowed to her and dared not to look at her in the eye. How tiring, she thought, a smile touching the corner of his lips when she met the butler bowing to her as well.
"Your Grace."
"Mister Chōjirō…" At his look, her smile widened. "I cannot bring myself to call you only Chōjirō. And please, call me Rukia. It still feels weird to be treated by my title."
"That is not fine by me, although acceptable." He bowed once again, his face serious as he asked, "What can I help you with, Lady Rukia?"
"I am looking for His Grace, is he by any chance in his study?"
"No, Your Grace." As he saw Rukia shaking her head, he bowed dutifully. "I apologize, Your Grace. I cannot bring myself to call you only by Lady Rukia as well." He cast a glance at her before completing, "His Grace is in the drawing room talking to Her Grace Shihōin, His Grace Urahara, Lord Hirako e Lord Abarai. I believe I saw Lord Schiffer as well."
"Thank you. That will be all, Mister Chōjirō."
"Your Grace." He bowed once again and proceeded in the contrary direction of the corridor.
"Mister Chōjirō," Rukia called, turning on her heels to face him. "Did His Grace have lunch today?"
"I am afraid he did not leave his study until the visits arrived, Your Grace."
Rukia touched her chin thoughtfully for a moment, before she decided, "make some sandwiches and tea. Let me know once it is ready. I shall serve them myself."
The butler seemed surprised for a moment.
"Excuse me, Your Grace. I cannot possibly let someone of your position do the work of a servant."
"It's no problem at all."
"But I cann—
"It's an order, Mister Chōjirō."
He bowed once again.
"I deeply apologize, Your Grace. Your order shall be carried out. Excuse me."
She was the one to bow her head once he left. A sigh left her lips as she walked towards the drawing room. Where did he have his head when he decided to spend the entire day without eating?
Perhaps he would be less upset with her — she still did not know why he was upset in the first place — after she served him and his friends, right?
Giving it some thought, she knew he had his reasons to be mad. It was not the first time she left without further notice. If it was him, she would be completely worried. Mainly now they were back to London where he had his fair share of enemies. Although she could defend herself, people would not hesitate to use her against him if given the chance.
Actually, they would create their opportunities — if Count Nnoitra's warning was of any indication back that day when the three of them met in the Theatre.
She shivered at the mere thought of him.
If she could bring herself to hate Hisagi, the same could not be told about Count Nnoitra. She hated him with all her heart and if possible, she would wipe his very existence away from the Earth without regrets.
Shaking her head, she stopped in front of the drawing room. The gigantic double doors were not only beautiful but majestic. Everything about his mansion in London was magnificent. Huge and somehow suffocating.
She missed the Silent Hall.
The freedom and the blissful moments they shared there…
His behavior.
He did not seem as cold and threatening as he seemed now. As if he himself was suffocated by something.
She placed her hand on the doorknob and was about to open the doors, when their heated voices reached her.
Before she could get a hold of herself, the old habit of hers, got the best of her.
###
Byakuya closed his eyes for a moment as Yoruichi discussed with both Shinji and Renji. By her side, her annoying husband smiled behind his white fan and Ulquiorra stood by his side, green eyes lost somewhere he did not have time, nor interest to find out.
His head hurt.
To be the whole day without eating was charging its price.
When Yoruichi and the gang arrived, he felt like sending them away, but perhaps some of them had news on what happened to Love. He had some information to share as well.
The annoying Duchess was the first to offer her hand for him to take — as if he would offer her some courteous greeting —, which did not happen. She laughed mischievously then.
If you think I'll tell you what Lady Rukia asked of me with such horrible treatment, you are totally wrong, Byakuya boy.
I have never asked you anything.
Her laugh became even louder.
You may not ask me as well, Urahara said, his face covered by the white fan.
So, whatever it was, Yoruichi's husband was also aware while he was not. It contributed very little to his growing bad humor.
They were now discussing on the best approach to the matter to the notebook and Love's death. Yoruichi tried, much to his surprise, explain to Renji — and Byakuya wondered how he could fight if he could not even strategize — they were not using Rukia to translate the notebook, for as he said endless times, she did not know the codes to translate it.
"Is she unable to translate or you are merely protecting her?" Ulquiorra asked after too much time in silence.
Everyone shifted their attentions back to him, but no one dared to reply. Byakuya pursed his lips into a thin line, but did not respond as well.
"Would you not protect your wife as well?" When Yoruichi saw him opening his mouth to reply, she did not give him enough time to and did it herself.
"I am sorry if it just seems rather surprising he places his wife, who could very well be the translator, above his own personal vendetta."
Surprisingly, there was not silence as Shinji started, "could we just go back to the main focus?"
"Shinji is right," Urahara conceded. "We are losing too much time on useless suppositions. Byakuya's private life is none of your business, Ulquiorra. If he says she can't translate the notebook, we must trust him. Because she really can't, right, Byakuya?"
His green eyes focused thoroughly on the Duke's gray ones, made him look completely serious, but then his usual smile took over his features, lightening the mood.
"Are you not going to defend yourself?" Renji asked, serving himself more whisky. To his stun, Yoruichi yanked the glass from his hands and drank it herself, offering it to her husband afterwards, her lips curling up in what Renji could discern as a well, thank you.
"I see no reason to defend myself from such baseless claims," Byakuya finally responded, his attention focused on Ulquiorra.
There was silence once again between them. Neither seemed willing to apologize. Yoruichi cleared her throat.
"Well… I don't know you, but I am hungry." She rose up from the ottoman she shared with her husband and walked to the double faced doors, "I think we should eat something before we continue. Oh well… Hello, Lady Rukia."
###
Rukia even tried to run as soon as she heard the Duchess saying she was hungry, but for some reason she could not force her body to.
...he places his wife, who could very well be the translator, above his own personal vendetta…
She felt so guilty as the words replayed in her mind once, twice, thrice, multiple times.
He was placing her well-being above whatever it was he considered important. Or as Lord Schiffer said, personal vendetta. Even if Rukia did not like revenges — rather abominated them, for her life became a living hell exactly because of a well-executed revenge that crushed her family and made her a beggar for so many years she did not even wanted to recall now —, she felt guilty she was the one to be in his way.
When Yoruichi walked to the door, she even walked away, but she was too slow and was caught.
Her body froze in place as the Duchess' cheerful voice echoed in the corridor.
"Oh, well… Hello, Lady Rukia."
To her completely surprise and relief as well, one of the footmen, accompanied by Mister Chōjirō, carried a trolley with what she ordered. A small, nervous and forced smile took upon her lips as she helped the butler open the double faced doors.
She did not even need to look up to know the Duke's stare was completely focused on her — needless to mention everyone else was looking at her as well.
"Wonderful, Lady Rukia!" Shinji raised both his thumbs for her. "We were hungry as hell!" When he noticed Byakuya shifted his attention to him and narrowed his gray eyes, he added, "I mean… Your Grace. I am nothing but a servant here." He bowed comically.
However, Rukia did not find the force within herself to reply to his mordacious comment. She merely nodded her head and helped the footman and the butler serving everyone, the nervous smile still on her face.
Did they know she was listening to them?
Or did they think she arrived that very minute with Mister Chōjirō and the snacks?
She never cared about spying, she had done that since she was little child, too curious to know her own place, and to be honest, since they met. But now, with the Duke somehow angry with her, it was all different.
When the butler and the footman bowed to group, she took that as her chance to escape as well.
"If you excuse me…"
She did not have much of luck to reach the door though, for her husband's deep voice reached her before.
"Stay."
"I-I… I don't want to disturb you, Your Grace."
He did not reply, eyes still focused on her. Rukia bit down her bottom lip hard and proceeded to leave. The message on his narrowed gray orbs was clear, the same she loved to disobey every time, I did not allow you to leave.
"Please, Lady Rukia," Yoruichi smirked at her, "grace ourselves with your company."
She found herself nodding, much to her own dismay, and sitting beside her husband in an ottoman; a good distance between them. He paid no heed to her and shifted closer, his knee touching hers.
Her eyes shot to him, but he was not even looking at her. On the contrary, he seemed quite interested in his tea.
Rukia swallowed hard and served herself with tea, her attention totally focused on the hot liquid as she waited for the upcoming questions about the marriage and heirs.
Before any of them could start, she shifted her attention to Lord Schiffer and started the questions herself,
"I presume Lady Schiffer is well…"
###
In spite of everyone's cheerful mood — except for Lord Schiffer, he seemed quite stoic all the time, even more than her husband, she would say — and the fact she was controlling the conversation at her own will, it felt rather awkward to be in the same room with all of them, when she knew what they were talking about.
Rukia knew almost nothing about his family. Again, how much did she know about the Duke, her husband? The more she thought about it, the more she realized they knew each other better in a bed than outside of it and while she had no complaints about their intimacies, it made her feel quite insecure she knew so little about the man she was married to.
Once the snacks were over, everyone headed out, both the Duke and she followed them to the main hall as Mister Chōjirō saw them out.
Alone in the main hall, Rukia looked down, her voice barely above a whisper as he stood before her, his much taller frame towering over hers.
"I apologize, Your Grace."
His gray eyes were cold and devoid of any emotion as he surveyed her carefully. His stoic face denounced nothing.
"I am sorry… I did not mean to overhear… I…"
"Rukia." His deep, low voice made her look up to meet his eyes.
"Yes."
"Do not expect me for dinner."
Without further words or explanations, he left her alone in the main hall, not acknowledging her apologies.
It was if he did not even listen to her.
She snorted as he climbed up the stairs as elegantly as ever, his jet black hair tied in a low ponytail. She was not sure it turned into words, but as she climbed up the same stairs shortly after him, she could not help but think repeatedly.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
###
I am sorry… I did not mean to overhear… I…
He surely seemed upset with her before, that morning when they talked in his study, but when he saw her in his drawing room when his friends held that conversation about the War and his father…
Gods above.
His usually emotionless gray eyes were full of some emotion she could not quite identify but would come close to label as anger. As if he did not want her to know what happened to his father, as if her knowing was somehow shameful.
In spite of the fact that she said she hated him — life was easier when she did —, she felt actually quite guilty she knew something he did not want her to know.
A grimace adorned her face as the realization that he kept yet another secret hit her.
"Are you fine, Your Grace?" Candice asked, her features frowning with worry.
"Yes… I… I am just tired. I have not been sleeping too well these days."
"I can see why." The smirk on the lady's maid face was totally mischievous.
"Candice!"
"What?"
Neither of them had much of time to reply, for the noise of the double doors of the room being opened was heard. Eyes widened, Rukia grabbed her dress and walked to the anteroom.
"Leave, please."
The lady's maid, unaware of the situation, merely smirked, but bowed and left all the same.
Alone in the anteroom with the Duke, Rukia swallowed hard.
"Have you eaten somewhere else?"
He eyed her as if she had grown another head, but nodded, placing a stack with missives in the coffee table. The lights were dim in the room as he proceeded to remove his coat and scarf. When he started removing his waistcoat, she walked to him and by snapping his hands away, did it for him.
Her eyes were cast down the whole time as she worked diligently on his clothes. Soon, the waistcoat along with his dress-shirt were tossed on the carpeted floor. Her fingers roamed his broad shoulders and strong arms lightly, her nails scraping his skin when he lowered his head and placed a kiss on her jawline.
She gasped.
His lips proceeded to her pulse point, the tongue lapping at the sensible skin there.
Before she could say or do anything, his lips returned to hers and he kissed her so thoroughly, her mind seemed fogged for a minute or so after he broke apart.
Rukia did not have much time to understand what was really going on, for he spun her around and quickly began working on the fastenings of her dress — he was so good at undressing her, she knew that if one day she did not have Candice anymore, he could very well do a good job in place of her lady's maid. Soon, she was left alone in her slip, his big hands on her shoulders, bringing her flush against his nude chest, his warm lips sending shivers up her spine as he kissed her shoulders and the column of her neck.
It was all so quick and her mind was still so clouded by lust, when she last realized she was lying on the couch in the anteroom, with him between her legs. His lips left her mouth to trail a path of kisses down her throat and clavicle, his hands working diligently on the straps of her slip.
"I am sorry…" Her voice was but a whisper in the silent room. "I really did not mean to eavesdrop earlier… I…" Her fingers were but a ghost in his face, removing his hair from the way, "I am sorry."
At her whispered apology, he froze in place. As if he did not want to hear that. As if it was the last thing he expected to hear in the lustful interlude.
His lips were still on her clavicle, unmoving, but soon enough, his body were not over hers, his warmth gone. He rose to his feet, walking far from the couch. The stoic man was back.
Rukia sighed.
"Look…" she started, her bottom lip sore, half because of his passionate treatment and also because of her stupid habit of biting them down. "I really did not mean to overhear and I appreciate you protected me, but—"
"I merely said the truth." He did not give her time to finish and cut her out. "Will that be all?"
"No!" She sat on the couch, her arms around her chest, keeping the slip in place. Her face completely flushed. Oh, how she hated when he tried to dismiss her.
"Rukia." His tone had a bit of warning in it. He looked at her over his shoulder, for if his voice was not enough, surely the glint in his eyes would suffice.
"I am sorry for what happened to your father…" Her own voice was small again, a mere whisper and if not for the way his shoulders stiffened, she would not know if he heard her or not. "I am really sorry. But if you let me… If you allow me to help, perhaps I…"
"No." He was harsh this time. "I am not repeating myself."
That said, he walked towards the door, ready to leave the room, when she stepped in front of him.
"Move."
"No." As he walked forward, she stepped backwards, till her back met the wooden doors. She hissed as some part of her column hit the doorknob, but yet, she did not move away. "We are having this conversation."
His eyes were locked on hers, as if he was trying to scare her away or something close to it. His hands on their side of her head, as if locking between his arms, made her feel small, insignificant. He seemed powerful this way, but she did not even budge. On the contrary, her left hand shot to his face, caressing his sharp cheekbones lightly, her violet eyes full of love and compassion.
As if burned by her touch, Byakuya broke away and walked back to their bedroom, Rukia following him closely behind, gathering their clothes in the way.
"I want to help. To be useful, I know I can… If you let me. If you stop being so stubborn."
"I said I will not risk your safety." He sat on the ottoman close to their bed and started removing his boots. Rukia kneeled to get those as well when his voice made her stop. "What are you doing?"
She frowned.
"Gathering the clothes off the floor?"
"You are not a servant."
Rukia almost rolled her eyes at his offended tone. Nobles were so easily offended she could not even begin to tell. He pulled her to him, the clothes and the boots falling from her hands as she yelped and fell over his lap.
Her hands shot to his shoulders and then to his hair, caressing the black locks softly. With his head buried on her neck, she could feel his very breath on her skin.
"I am trying to protect you."
"And I am trying to help you."
"I know…" he trailed off. "But your security is far meaningful to me."
"Nothing will harm me. You can protect me."
"I cannot…" His voice was almost desperate as he continued. "Not if you get involved in this."
There was silence for a moment, Rukia continued to caress his hair as he laid his head on her shoulders. His closed eyes made him look almost peaceful — she would have been fooled by the expression on his face if not for his hands holding her forcefully against him, as if she was about to get ripped out from his arms.
"Tell me what happened to your father," she asked, kissing the crown of his head.
As expected there was no answer. He merely rose up from the ottoman and with her on his arms, placed her on the mattress, his body leaving hers.
"You should sleep."
"I am sorry…" She closed her eyes. "I should not have asked. I apologize for having overstepped by boundaries."
He seemed tense for a moment, his hands into fists by his side. He did not need to look over his shoulders to know she was sitting on the verge of the bed, ready to walk to him.
"Stay where you are."
"Byakuya… I…"
"He died in the Trafalgar Battle…" He started, his voice low and husky. "I lost him because we were betrayed. Double agents that offered to help him and our soldiers. There were double agents inside the organization with the most trusted spies of the Crown."
Rukia closed her eyes.
Perhaps you don't believe people may help you without second reasons.
It explained quite a lot. Explained why he was always so on his toes with everyone, why he did not trust people.
You don't trust anyone.
He had his fair share of reasons not to.
Who was she to judge him when she was the one to have a knife pressed against his back?
"The notebook your father created has the relation of the names of those double agents," he finished, shoulders still up and tensed.
"Then, let me help you. If I see it…"
If I see it again, if I finish both copying and translating it for you… If you let me…
She wanted to say. She wanted so badly to say, but she was so afraid he would hate her endlessly for having said.
If their relationship did not begin with so many lies… Was it too late to speak the truth now? To undo that pile of wretched dishonesty?
"My answer remains no."
Not really sure of what to do, Rukia walked to him and hugged him from behind, her arms keeping him in place. Her head buried in his back.
"I am sorry… I am so sorry."
She did not really know what she was apologizing for now. Was it for his loss… or because she was no better than none of those who betrayed and killed his father?
He turned to face her, his fingertips lifting her chin. Her eyes were moistened with unshed tears.
Tears for she was sad for his loss.
Tears because she was guilty.
Guilty for lying to him.
Guilty for not being able to tell the truth now.
For being afraid of telling the truth.
Guilty for she had judged him so harshly before and in the end he was just another victim of that wretched War that racked that country for so many years.
"You should sleep," he said, his lips ghosting bellow her eyes, kissing away the tears.
"Come with me."
This time, even if he did not reply, the way he brought her fingers to his lips and kissed it lovingly was enough answer.
###
Byakuya did not sleep.
By his side, Rukia slept peacefully. With his hand placed upon her flat belly, he traced incomprehensive patterns on the silky fabric, his legs tangled with hers and his breath caressing her neck.
He inhaled her scent and kissed her shoulders, feeling how she shivered in his embrace.
It still bothered him how open he had been with her. And how foolish he had acted the whole day with her. How could he judge her for keeping secrets from him when he did not want to share his past with her as well?
If she was a liar, he was no better than her.
However, Rukia did not understand he solely wanted her well-being when he decided to keep the notebook away from her.
Memories were a dangerous territory to play within. He was not willing to risk her sanity for his, as Ulquiorra said that afternoon, personal vendetta.
After having lost his whole family, he would make sure he did not lose Rukia as well. He would be damned if he let any danger approach her.
She was his… everything.
Letting the notebook fall into her possession was surely not one of his ideas of avenging his father. But perhaps… He did not need to forget the whole idea of the notebook to get his so wanted justice.
If Hisana was indeed alive…
And as the translator of the notebook…
All Byakuya had to do was get his hold on her.
Removing himself from the bed and disentangling himself from Rukia — not without earning a very unsatisfied grunt —, he grabbed his robe and walked to the anteroom, missive in hands.
He closed the doors behind himself and by lightening the lantern in the anteroom.
The missive, although signed by Ajit, was clearly not written by him. Even if the Duke did not recognize the calligraphy, he knew the words were not from the Indian Captain.
As the first time he heard the news about Hisana from Detective Ishida, he could not prevent himself from feeling as if something quite bad was about to happen.
Revelations he was certainly not expecting hit him fully as he read the first lines of the letter, the rough paper held firmly between his fingers.
Your Grace,
I have a lot to say, a lot to apologize and a lot more to ask for. But the first thing I need to say is that my condition worsened and my plans of leaving the country and live in another place completely failed. By the time you have this missive in your hands, I, Hisana Ukitake, will be certainly dead.
Byakuya closed his eyes for a moment.
He did not really know what to feel, but his plans were frustrated all along.
This time, Hisana was dead.
Really dead.
A/N – Well… That's it xD
In case it was not clear, Rukia heard more than what I showed, so she heard about his father. It's just because I said it before, so I thought it'd be tiring to show it again.
Firstly, I have to announce that if possible, I'll update once a week in January. If not, at least twice. I have my final paper to finish, so you know. Even so, I intend to use 2017 to finish The Duke's Lover. There is only 14 chapters left, can hardly believe I wrote this much for this story.
As horrible in general 2016 may have been worldwide, it was a good year for me and specially a good year for my writing. I can barely believe I reached 830 reviews, guys! The Duke's Lover is now the third most reviewed ByaRuki fanfiction and I can only thank you all. I could not be more grateful you gave me and my story such a chance. When I started The Duke's Lover because I was depressed and feeling bad I never thought I'd go this far with it. So thank you. Thank you. Thank you *bows deeply*
To everyone who reviewed last chapter, my biggest thanks. You are amazing. Thanks to all favorites and follows as well.
This story was added to the Community Rukia Kuchiki's Community of Praiseworthy Stories. There is a lot of wonderful fanfics there. If you ever need something new (or even old) to read, go check there. Also, to the reader who added my stories in this community, my biggest thanks. Love you.
To those who PM/review me once in a while and say that enjoy rereading this story from the beginning, I'd like to say I edited chapter 1 and I intend on editing all the chapters, so you know, my English was quite bad in the beginning and now that I've improved in my knowledge of grammar and all, I thought it'd be good if I edited the grammatical mistakes. Not to mention ffnet keeps on deleting parts of my story. T.T
As I said, Happy New Year in advance and hope our 2017 is bright.
Take care and love you,
Velvetsins.
