A/N - thank you for all the lovely reviews. They mean the world.

Bernie just looks at the two new envelopes without speaking. She wasn't emotional prepared for more envelopes and felt an accusatory snap rise to her lips that she bit back before she vocalised it. This was Serena's show and she was entitled to do this how she wanted. Two more wasn't ten more. "Incan do two" she thought and said "Is this it Serena?" needing confirmation.

"I promise Bernie, no more after these two. I just, well, wanted these two separate, it seemed right. I didn't mean to trick you, I'm sorry.."

"It's okay" the blonde whispered. "I can do this for you"

The enormity of that hit the both. Serena knew Bernie didn't really want to be here, wouldn't have even come to say goodbye if she hadn't demanded it of her, but she always did what Serena asked, cared for her so much like that. It's why Serena couldn't ask her outright to stay, it wouldn't be fair. The Major had to want to." Bernie meanwhile was thinking about how she would do anything for Serena, the brightest star in her sky and the one she had herself extinguished with the kiss.

Serena sat on the edge of the other sofa which was set at 90 degrees to the other one with the envelopes on and the immediately got back up as Bernie stayed standing. She went over and stood next to her, wanting to take her hand but it was the bandaged one and she would not cause any more pain. She picked number 8 up and drew Bernie back to the opposite sofa so they both could sit. The army medic perched on the very edge, her anxiety plain to see. She wouldn't look at Serena as she was handed the envelope. She had an inkling that this was big, why else would it be separate.

It was an A4 envelope that felt like it was full, crammed full of paper. She sat and held it, the adrenaline coursing through her veins. "I can't..."

Serena took it back off and waited until her friends breathing slowed.

"Do you want me to?"

Bernie nodded in relief as she met Serena's eyes. "Can you just wait a few minutes though or..."

"Or?" Serena prompted.

Bernie said nothing for a second and taking her eyes away, breathe out, "Or I might run" she admitted sadly.

Serena nodded and sat back slightly still holding the envelope. She closed her eyes and they sat in silence for a while. She jumped a little when she felt Bernie's fingers ghost up her arm but kept her eyes closed, not wanting to frighten the poor woman.

"I'm ready" came the whisper.

Serena slowly and surely opened the envelope and drew out the stack of papers. "Close your eyes Bernie. I won't hurt you."

And Bernie did what she was asked, choosing to trust the woman she'd found and lost again by her own actions. She felt Serena get up from the sofa and heard paper rustling in front of her somewhere. A few moments passed and the comforting weight of her best friend returned to the sofa but she kept her eyes closed.

"Can I hold your hand?"

Came Serena's voice, wobbling slightly and Bernie sagged with relief. "Yes please" she replied and instantly felt her heart rate slow as warm fingers were slipped into her right hand. Serena felt calmer too and they sat there with their eyes shut again, neither really wanting the moment to end.

"On 3?" Serena asked. "3" replied Bernie with more confidence than she felt.

"1,2,3."

She opened her eyes . In front of her, laid all over the coffee table and the floor in front of her, were pictures of her and Serena together. Selfies they'd taken together and pictures from others. Them singing together on the ward and in Albies, at various birthday parties and functions. All dressed up at the conference they'd been to on facial-maxillary trauma to present their work. At the wedding of one of the nurses from Keller and the Christmas party last year. Sat with Jason appearing between their shoulders pulling a silly face, pictures skating with the Fletcher kids, Serena clinging to Bernie as she'd never skated before, outside the cinema both pretending to kiss Colin Firth on the cheek on a life size cutout, and one shot she hadn't seen before, where she was sat at the desk at the nurses station and Serena was looking at her, not realising the picture had been taken. A look so filled with wonder and care and love?

Serena just let her look, at each picture while she studied the blonde's face, still holding her hand in a slightly sweaty grip. Opened her mouth and said.

"Reason 8 - me."

She couldn't say anything else after that. The words wouldn't come. She wanted to be all Bernie's reasons, part of every part of her life, forever and ever amen.

Bernie turned and searched her eyes, those dark, soulful eyes looking back at her, almost as if she was seeing her for the first time. Serena let her look, holding the gaze so Bernie could confirm what she was saying. And then, reached behind her back and passed her something.

Envelope 9.