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Chapter 27 –
"Something's wrong with you lately," Emmett said as they got ready for their final game of the regular season. It was a home game, and a division game. The Avalanche were not going to get first in the West, since the Anaheim Ducks had clinched the spot when they won their game the night before.
The Avalanche was going to finish second, with the Red Wings right behind them in third. The good news was that they probably wouldn't have to play the Red Wings early in the playoffs, and it didn't look likely they'd have to in the second or third round, either.
Since the playoff spots were set, the game didn't mean that much. Unfortunately though, it was against Edmonton, and Emmett could tell that something was up with Edward, and there was more than a slight chance that he might take whatever was going on with him out on one of the players; most likely the Black kid.
"I'm fine, and I'm sick of telling people that," Edward replied tersely, and went back to lacing up his skates. He didn't notice Emmett and Jasper exchange glances.
"You're not fine, Edward. Alice is bothering me all the time to figure out what's wrong with you. Even she can't figure it out, and she always can."
"You know, I was fine until every single person decided to ask me what was wrong with me. I just want this game to be over with. I don't want to play the Oilers."
"That's because you want to beat the shit out of the Black kid. It's not gonna go very well either," Tristan said.
"You think he could beat me in a fight?"
"It's possible," Emmett said, "but Tristan's right, Edward. Do not start shit with him, no matter how much he pisses you off. If they win tonight, they'll move to the seventh spot, which means that we play them first-round in the playoffs and we don't need our star forward getting thrown out or beaten up."
"I'm not going to beat up Jacob Black, or let him beat me up, so would you please fuck off and get yourselves prepared for the game? At this rate it's going to be you idiots who fuck this up."
Emmett gave up and went to get ready, then headed out. Carlisle met him outside the door. "He's going to get himself hurt."
Carlisle sighed. "Well, if hopefully we'll be able to tell beforehand and he'll just spend the game on the bench."
"Glad you'll have to be the one to tell him."
Just as Emmett predicted, Edward was not himself. In fact, on several occasions just in the first seven minutes, Edward was doing things he never did on the ice. When he had the choice, he'd take the man instead of the puck. He'd already taken a penalty, and if the ref had been fair, he should have gotten another one.
The Oilers were already up by one. Things were going pretty miserably for the Avalanche, and the fans could sense it, but it was about to get a lot worse. Jacob Black passed the puck right to Sam, who shot directly at Jasper, who caught it in-between his pads. Before the period ended, Jacob got right up to the net and attempted to get the puck from the goaltender, but when the whistle blew, he backed off. Edward ignored that, and went straight for Jacob, pushing him. Then Jacob came back at Edward, and soon the two were in an all-out fight right next to the Avalanche net.
As the teams closed in, the refs came over. Edward pulled Jacob forward and as he fell, his skate came up and the sharp blade came into contact with the side of Jasper's leg, right behind his goalie pad.
Jasper buckled, falling onto his other knee as Edward backed off to cool down from the fight. He was upset enough that he didn't even notice the commotion until Bill came onto the ice as Emmett and Tristan both took Jasper to the bench, a, trail of blood dripping behind him.
Edward's heart sank. He realized right away what he was doing, and it was entirely his fault. He skated over to the bench and got there just as they took Jasper to the training room and the backup goalie was getting ready to go on the ice. Carlisle simply turned to him and said, "I think you need to go to the locker room. I'd rather be a man short than let you back out there to get another one of our players injured."
"Carlisle, the lines will be completely off," Edward argued.
"We survived in December, so we can get through one more game."
Edward headed off to the training room to see how Jasper was. He looked in the room for a minute and considered going in, but they were stitching up Jasper's leg. He headed to the change room and quickly took off his gear and changed into his suit. He considered going back to see how Jasper was, or going somewhere to watch the game, but he really just wanted somewhere to cool off and think about what he was going through, and what he needed to do to fix it.
As he headed out he ran straight into Alice who was on the verge of tears, accompanied by Bella who also had tears in her eyes. Alice looked at him and his heart broke just a little. "Please don't talk to me right now. Maybe come back when my actual cousin reappears and the asshole that has inhabited his body goes away." She stormed off.
"I think I should go with Alice." Bella said, looking extremely torn. "Unless you need..."
"Go with her. It seems like Jasper's all right; they aren't even taking him to the hospital, but I don't think he's ever gotten injured on the ice before, so she'll be a wreck. I need some time anyway."
"Fine, but we need to talk because I'm with Alice on this; you're different, and I'm scared because you won't tell me why. Something's wrong, and I wish you would talk to me about it, but even if you can't talk to me, you need to talk to somebody."
Edward took a quick glance around, making sure there was no one around, and then he pulled her into a hug. "I love you. You go with Alice and I'm going to get my thoughts together. Then I'll come see you. It might take a while."
"I'll wait up."
"I might be really, really late." He pulled his head back without letting go.
She pulled him back. "And I might possibly love you enough to stay up anyway."
"You're amazing. I love you."
"I love you too. Go sort your stuff out, and I'll see you soon." She kissed him and then followed after Alice.
When she got there, Alice had her arms around Jasper and the tears were falling steadily. Bella decided to give them a minute and stepped out of the doorway. She finally let her tears fall; for Alice, for Jasper, but mostly for Edward. She knew he was lost and she was terrified.
"Bella you can come in," Jasper called after a few seconds. Alice was wiping away her tears while Jasper held her protectively.
"I'm sorry," Bella apologized. "It's been a horrible few weeks and I just couldn't stop myself from crying. How's your leg? Is it going to be okay? God, I'm rambling again."
"Bella I'm going to be fine; it looked worse than it was. It's stitched up and I barely feel it now. You both need to stop crying. I'm not used it with one girl, and now I've got two."
"I can't help it," Alice protested. "I've never had to watch you get practically carried off the ice. It was horrible. People aren't supposed to touch you! You're the goalie! You're not supposed to get hurt. When Edward and Emmett get hurt it sucks, but at least you're prepared for it."
"I don't think it matters if you're prepared for it. Watching Edward get hurt back in November was horrible."
"True," Alice nodded.
"Where is he? I saw him in his suit. Did Carlisle kick him out for the rest of the game?"
"Yeah. He left, and didn't even tell me where he was going," Bella replied.
"I'm worried about him," Alice said. "Something happened after that game in Detroit. I'm pretty sure that's when things got really weird."
Jasper thought about it a minute. "Yeah, I agree. Maybe he's more injured than we all thought he was. He always gets sour when he's hurt."
"Bill would know about it if ,that was the case" Alice said. "Besides, he would have rested for these last few games if he was hurt; that way he'd be ready for the playoffs. I don't think he's hurt. Bella, has he said anything?"
"No, but I told him I wanted answers. He said he needs some time, but I'm not letting him run away again."
"Good luck. If anyone can get him to open up, it's you." Alice said hopefully as she pulled her into a hug.
"Yeah, but I'm afraid even I won't be able to."
Edward drove around for an extended period of time. It was spring, and a nice evening. He ended up at City Park. He got out of his car and simply wandered around for a short time, then stood at the edge of the pond and threw rocks. He had no idea what to do. He knew this was exactly what James wanted. The asshole had him right where he wanted him: screwing up with everyone at home, and on the ice.
Should he tell Bella? She'd be even more worried than he was. She had so much more to lose than he did, and he knew it. He didn't want her to worry about this. All she needed to focus on was her articles right now.
But he felt like he needed to tell someone or he'd explode.
There was always Esme, but she would work herself to death trying to sort a way through the whole ordeal without it ending in James' complete attack on the family and Bella.
Carlisle, Jasper, and Emmett had enough to worry about on the ice, and they didn't need to deal with Edward's shit too. It wasn't fair. Sure they were family, but he was not about to distract the coach and two key players right before playoffs.
Alice was very mad at him. He couldn't remember the last time she'd looked at him the way she dha tonight. He knew if he told her the entire story, she'd understand, and want to help, but it was still James, and whenever possible, he wanted to keep her as far away from the bastard as he possibly could.
That left only one person. He still didn't think it was fair to drag anyone in the family into the ordeal, but Rose was the best option.
He got out his phone and called her. When she answered, he got right to it. "Hey Rose, it's Edward. Would you meet me at the pond at City Park?"
"What's going on?"
"I'll tell you when you get here, and if possible could you not tell everyone where you're going?"
"What am I supposed to say?"
"Tell them some diva client of yours needs you."
"Fine. Give me twenty minutes."
Twenty minutes later, almost on the dot, she was there. "Now would you please tell me what's going on?"
"I need to know if you can keep something quiet for me. And by quiet, I mean you can't tell anyone; not Alice, Bella, or Esme…not even Emmett."
"That's asking a lot," she replied. Edward just nodded silently. "But if it's going to fix this little rut you've been in, then fine."
"I've been playing like shit," he agreed
"I don't mean on the ice. No one cares about that–-okay that's a lie, we care, and so does all of Denver-but we care more about whatever the hell happened to make you so miserable all the time." She looked around. "Let's sit down and talk."
After they were comfortably sitting on the grass, Edward blurted, "James knows about Bella." Rosalie's eyes widened and he continued, telling her the entire story. Then she got up and began pacing.
"We should have just let it come out after New Year's. Then it would have blown over by now."
"But Bella would be out of a job," Edward protested.
"She could have found another one, but if this gets out now, not only are we dealing with how we all lied in January, but she'd be labeled a whore and gold-digger who sleeps with anyone with fame and money. No offense."
"Believe me, I've thought it over a thousand times. I'm afraid that's exactly what's going to happen."
Rosalie sat down again. "Well you can't keep going on like this. You had a meltdown on the ice today. You wanted to hit something and Jacob Black was the best target. Since you're not a fighter, the entire city of Denver knows something is probably seriously wrong with you."
"It's what James wants. For me to fall into this hole and then perform horribly in the playoffs. I don't think there's anything he wants more than to humiliate me in front of the entire country. If he can't do it on the ice, he'll do it with the picture."
"Oh, that's a given."
"I don't know what to do. Should I tell Bella?"
"No, don't tell her just yet. She still feels bad about everyone coming to her rescue after New Year's. This will scare her even more, and she'll blame herself."
"Then what do I do? She knows something is wrong; everyone knows something's wrong. I told her I'd talk to her tonight. I can't put it off any longer. Should I lie?"
"Not exactly, just don't get specific. Tell her it's the playoffs, and that it feels so different this year; it means that much more to you, and maybe give up the stupid tough hockey player image and tell her you're scared. Then you have to grow a pair and act like everything is okay, especially on the ice. Carlisle, Emmett, and Jasper deserve to have you at your best for the post season. Don't let James win."
"He's going to though. If not now, then eventually. He won't sit on the picture forever."
"Yeah, we'll deal with that when the time comes. The game is probably over by now, so go home, apologize to Bella, make it up to her, and let her feel like everything is all right."
She stood up and brushed off her skirt. "I'm leaving now, and you should do the same."
"You know Rose, after a speech like that, I can definitely say you would have made an excellent hockey coach."
"Yeah right, me in a room with a bunch of big sweaty guys with equipment that smells like all kinds of nasty? Not a chance." Edward laughed. "Look at that, it's working already. That might be the first genuine smile I've seen since Detroit.
"I owe you."
"You sure do." She walked to her car, Edward following.
As they got to the parking lot, she said, "Hey, the Avalanche won. Now you at least won't have to face Edmonton first round."
"My pride will appreciate that I'm sure"
"After what happened tonight, you should have no pride left."
"You're probably right." Rosalie glared in response. "You're definitely right."
They got in their cars and headed their separate ways.
Edward had barely gotten the key in the door to Bella's apartment when it was flung open and he hurried inside, hurriedly apologizing. "I'm sorry Bella."
"Don't apologize to me. Just tell me what's going on."
He pulled her into his arms and tucked her head under his chin. "Honestly, I wasn't really sure until tonight. Stuff has just been really hard lately," he replied. "Usually the playoffs don't bother me that much, but this year, something is different. It feels like I won't be able to pull it off. I know it's ridiculous, but everything feels different, and I'm not sure why."
Bella was silent for a minute. "Maybe something has you distracted."
"It's possible. I don't know."
"Did you think about what might be different this year?"
"What do you mean?"
"Edward, maybe it's me and these articles. Maybe I'm putting all this pressure..."
"No." He cupped her chin in his hands. "Bella I don't think I would have even gotten this far if it weren't for you. I love you, and you're not a distraction. It's just that I'm captain now and not a rookie superstar anymore. It's expected that I lead the team with experience, but I don't even know if I have that experience."
"But you do Edward. Everybody knows that, and you know what? You do too."
"I love you."
"I know. And I love you too." She cuddled up close to him. "Just promise me that next time you have your own shit to deal with, you'll at least give someone a hint as to what it is? We're all so worried about you."
"I know, but I really just figured it out myself. I wandered around City Park tonight until it came to me. I just don't want to let anyone down. Not you, or my family, or this city that has been so good to me."
"You do realize that if the Avalanche lose, they lose as a team. It's not all on your shoulders. If you play your best and it still turns out bad, then so be it. We can't change what happens. But if you pull the stuff you did tonight, everyone will blame you. You're so much better than that; not only a better player, but a better person too."
"I know that. Now, especially."
"Excellent, because I happen to love good Edward," she said matter-of-factly.
Edward smirked. "Is that so? You only love good Edward?"
"Well, maybe I can deal with bad Edward every once in a while." She grinned.
"Good." He grabbed her and threw her over his shoulder and she squealed.
He didn't put her down until he dropped her unceremoniously onto her bed. Almost immediately he was on top of her, kissing her neck as he undid the buttons on her shirt. He spread the shirt apart and revealed her bra. He grinned realizing it was front-clasp, and quickly had that aside as well.
One nipple was quickly in his mouth and Bella moaned as she reached for his dress pants. As soon as they were undone, she reached inside and stroked him.
It was his turn to moan at the wonderful torture and not to be undone he bit down lightly on her nipple.
He reached under her skirt and pulled her barely-there lace underwear to the side and quickly entered her with two fingers as his thumb played with her clit. She cried out and tugged on him a little harder. Soon she was stroking him at the same pace as he was fingering her.
When it got too much for both of them, he kissed her on the lips and reached for the clasp on her skirt.
"That takes too much time," she replied and quickly pulled her underwear off and lifted her skirt above her hips. He was quickly inside her. It was hard and fast and soon they both came loudly. It was by no means excellent lovemaking; the entire thing took all of fifteen minutes, but it was exactly what they needed. It was as if all the tension that had been building up for the last two weeks was gone almost instantly.
But after a few minutes, Bella became more aware of Edward's body partially on top of her. The bunched up skirt was digging into her lower back, and his pants began to feel scratchy on her legs. "I think we need to readjust," she said finally.
"Sorry." He pulled back quickly.
She made a quick sound of protest, put the skirt back to a comfortable position, and pulled him back down so he was right beside her. "That's better." After a few more seconds though, the pants were annoying her again. "Okay I lied. Your pants are itchy." Edward just laughed. "You should take them off. Actually let's just get rid of all these clothes."
"I was going to do that a little while ago, but someone was being impatient."
"Shut up and take your pants off," she said as she got out of her clothes as well.
When they were completely naked, he pulled her back into his arms. "Better now?"
"Perfect. You?"
"Excellent," he replied, but as Bella fell asleep in his arms, he had doubts that he'd be able to keep it together as long as he needed to. "Please don't let her get hurt in all this," he whispered to no one. Bella sighed in her sleep. He hugged her tighter, wishing it would all just go away.
