Title: Phoenix Tears
Author: slytherin-nette
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters you recognize from the HP books in this story. All I own is the plot. Everything else belongs to JK Rowling.
Full Summary: To Draco Malfoy, his orders from the remaining Death Eaters were simple. Turn Harry Potter into a woman. Get her pregnant. Resurrect Lord Voldemort's soul into the baby's body. The plan was flawless. He just never planned on falling in love. [DM/femHP]. Post-DH Hogwarts.
Pairings: DM/femHP, Past HP/GW, RW/HG, others.
Warnings: Tormented!Draco and Bitter!Harry. Spoilers from Books. Pregnancy. VERY dark and mature themes.
A/N: I am so very sorry for the long wait for this chapter, but I've been kind of busy during the holidays. All those Christmas parties and get-togethers, of course. Anyway, here's to a wonderful new year, right? Hope you all enjoyed your holidays and consider this my very very late Christmas gift! :D
Chapter 28 – An Innocent Life
"Malfoy, we have to talk."
Draco froze at the sound of Ron Weasley's voice but even before he got the chance to say anything, the redheaded Gryffindor had already reached out and purposely tipped the goblet of pumpkin juice in front of where he had been seated. Reacting instinctively, Draco and Blaise, who was seated beside him, both jumped up from their seats before the pumpkin juice managed to spill onto their pants and looked up, glaring simultaneously at Ron when the Gryffindor smiled coldly at them.
"Now, Malfoy."
He ignored the two Ravenclaws who were now staring at them in confusion and glared at Draco again, narrowing his eyes and watching as the Slytherin gave him a sarcastic sneer in return.
"Are you breaking up with me, Weasley?"
Beside him, Blaise sniggered loudly at the jibe while Ron felt his fists clench up even more in his anger. He chose to ignore that little comment and watched impatiently as Draco set his now empty goblet calmly back onto the table and glanced up at him, his gray eyes narrowing in caution. Then, after bidding a quick nod of farewell to Blaise, he slung his bag over his shoulder and reluctantly followed Ron out of the busy Great Hall, well-aware of the stares they were getting from everyone else.
They found a semi-deserted portion of a wide corridor near one of their DADA classrooms and stopped there, Ron turning around and glaring at Draco as though he half-expected the other teen to know what he was going to say. Draco didn't, unfortunately, and when all the blonde Slytherin did was to stare back calmly at him and mock him further with another cynical smile, Ron finally snapped.
"You're disgusting, you know that?" He growled, his fingernails digging into his palms.
Draco blinked and stared back coolly at him, one of his eyebrows arching up again in question.
"And you're…detestable…But I think we've established that early on. What is this about, Weasley?" Draco drawled, sounding bored and irritated as he narrowed his eyes at the other teen. Ron grew even angrier at the Slytherin's seemingly unperturbed expression throughout their ensuing conversation and began to clench his fists even tighter, leveling the other boy with a guarded glare.
"I will ask you only once, Malfoy." Ron saw Draco arching an eyebrow mockingly at him again but he continued, his voice coming out cold and harsh. "Did you or did you not rape my best friend?"
Draco's cheeks began to flush with anger as he looked up, meeting Ron's icy glare for a couple of seconds before he turned away and scoffed, shoving his hands into the pockets of his school robes.
"I already told you I didn't, Weasley. What makes you think I would do that?" He tried to force himself to sound calm as he said this but Draco was gritting his teeth so much that Ron could easily see that the Slytherin was agitated and that he would have given anything to punch Ron's lights out.
Ron snorted at his answer and crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned against the wall.
"You're a Death Eater. Frankly, I wouldn't put anything past you." He pointed out bluntly.
Draco's eyes narrowed and he stared blankly at him, his eyes cool and unreadable. Forcing himself to dig his nails into the palms of his hands to control his anger, he replied in a sarcastic voice.
"Oh, that's harsh."
"Oh is it?" Ron smirked back at him, narrowing his eyes and straightening back up from where he was leaning against the wall. Then, as fast as it had appeared, the smirk was gone and was replaced by another menacing growl. "Just answer the question Malfoy before I beat it out of you."
Draco looked back calmly at him, his expression completely unreadable.
"I didn't."
Ron's eyes hardened and his fingers were itching to wrap themselves around Draco's neck.
"I don't believe you."
Draco let out an exasperated sigh of frustration and unwound the strap of his bag from his shoulder, dropping it impatiently onto the floor. He waited until a small group of first year students had managed to pass them in the corridor before he looked at Ron again, his voice surprisingly steady.
"You asked me a question, Weasley…I gave you a straightforward answer." He drawled calmly but even Ron could easily notice that the Slytherin's jaw was beginning to tighten and that Draco's hand were already hovering near his pockets for his wand, itching to hex Ron into the next century.
Still, that didn't stop Ron from taunting Draco further and extracting the truth.
"What is your relationship with her exactly?" He asked but Draco just sneered calmly at him again, emulating Ron's earlier position by crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the wall.
"We're…friends."
Ron's ears began to redden and he clenched his fists, his arms trembling in unkempt anger.
"Friends don't have sex, Malfoy."
To his outrage, Draco's smirk widened and his eyes glinted slightly as though he was amused.
"No, they don't."
Ron felt his fingers beginning to shake violently as he dug his nails deeper into his palms, struggling desperately to keep himself from punching the sneering blonde Slytherin in front of him.
"You find my question funny or something?"
The amusement on the blonde's face was evident now, and Draco arched an eyebrow at him.
"I believe the word you're looking for is moronic." He drawled back calmly in response.
"You raped her, Malfoy." Ron hissed at him, his features contorted into a furious scowl now but Draco just stared coolly at him, his face set into a sneer but his eyes glowing with rage of his own.
"I assure you, I did no such thing."
"You're lying."
Draco's eyes flashed and he reached for his bag again, looking extremely irritated as he began to walk away. "Look, I don't have time for your damn idiocy, Weasley…I'm going to go to class—"
"She would never have let you touch her otherwise!" Ron snapped at him but Draco just scoffed, shaking his head as he answered Ron's angry retort at him with a calm smile. He adjusted his bag strap over his shoulder again and raised an eyebrow at him, leveling him with a pointed glare.
"I don't know about you, Weasley…But I don't have to force myself on a girl to touch her…Let alone sleep with her. Now get the hell out of my way—" Draco stopped and made to shove past Ron again but furious of Draco's dismissal of him, Ron blurted out the first thing that came to his mind.
"Harry is not a girl!"
Draco scoffed again and paused for a brief second to shoot Ron a self-satisfied, taunting smile.
"I can assure you from first hand experience, she is…Would you like me to tell you many times I've been in her?" He mocked but this proved to be the wrong thing to say because in an instant, Ron's ears had burned red and without so much as another word, he rushed right at Draco in outrage.
"You BASTARD!"
Ron lunged at Draco before the Slytherin got any more of a chance to react and instinctively, he raised his fist, ready to slam it into the other boy's face as hard as he could. He hadn't anticipated, however, that Draco had been expecting his hostility and had easily retaliated, swerving around his punch easily and twisting them around such that, to Ron's dismay, he was the one who had his face pressed painfully against the wall of the corridor in front of him, his hands caught behind his back. Even without looking at the other boy, he heard Draco's mocking sneer in his voice when the Slytherin began hissing at him from behind, raising his wand and pointing it angrily at the back of Ron's head.
"You're seriously beginning to piss me off, Weasley—"
Ron began to struggle against the grip Draco had twisted around his arm but his efforts were useless and soon, the blonde began to drawl again, shoving the tip of wand harder against Ron's head.
"—I do not have the patience to deal with you right now—"
"LET ME GO, YOU DEATH EATER!"
Draco raised his free hand, impatiently tugging free the clasps around his wrist and yanking the sleeve of his school shirt up until, to Ron's utter shock, the black, ugly Dark Mark was in full view against the paleness of his skin. He saw the way Ron's cheeks had suddenly drained of color at this but Draco just sneered at him and held it up even higher for him to see, practically shoving the mark right into the other boy's face and causing him to wince and try to turn his head away from the sight.
"I don't want to see that, Malfoy—"
Ron tried to turn his head away again when Draco held the Dark Mark up even higher for him to see. When Ron had managed to look away, Draco grabbed him by his hair and yanked, forcing him to keep looking at the mark. Growling, Ron tried to turn away again but that was when Draco snapped.
"That's right…Stare at it. Stare at the fucking thing, you little bastard. Stare at it and fear it and tremble before it like the coward you are." Draco's voice was laced very heavily with mockery as he spoke to him, his words causing Ron to stiffen in outrage and struggle violently to move away.
"MALFOY LET GO—"
Draco's eyes narrowed and his features began to harden into a menacing sneer. "Let's be honest with each other, Weasley." He drawled and when Ron turned to glare at him in confusion, he let out a harsh laugh. "Let's be honest because you and I both know that if it hadn't been for Harry always beside you, you'd be just as scared and terrified of the Dark Lord as I was…Wouldn't you…?" Draco ended this statement with a challenging hiss that, despite its softness, made Ron cringe slightly.
"I'm not at all like you—"
"You know that too, don't you Weasley…?" Draco interrupted him calmly and when he realized that Ron was beginning to cower away from him and from the Dark Mark, he let the other boy go, shoving him away and accidentally causing him to crash into a wall. Despite all this, Draco continued to watch him and when Ron couldn't seem to find the strength to look up, he resumed speaking again.
"You'd have been exactly in my position right now, if it hadn't been for Harry always by your side protecting you, wouldn't you…? A Death Eater… Scum of the Earth…Just…Like…Me." Draco's sneer transformed slowly into a menacing smile as he said this but to his surprise, Ron glared back at him and met his look easily, the Gryffindor's eyes hardening as they rested on Draco's harsh expression.
There was denial in his eyes now, intermingled with all his rage, but still Ron managed to find the voice to speak and he replied in a shaky whisper. "I'm onto you, Malfoy…" He paused for a moment when Draco stiffened at his words before continuing. "You and Goyle have been up to something since the beginning of the year…I've been watching you two closely…Too closely, in fact."
Again, Draco stiffened and his cheeks began to lose color but he held Ron's glare, masking his nervousness with a hard sneer. "I don't know what the bloody hell you're talking about, Weasley—"
"—and I don't know what exactly you two are up to but I know it's not good…And believe me when I say that I will kill you if you ever do anything to hurt my friends…" Ron warned him in a soft voice that seemed to betray the threat he was trying to convey. Nonetheless, Draco narrowed his eyes at him and when the redhead said nothing else, he shoved the Gryffindor away from him in disgust.
"Just stay away from me, Weasley. Or else." He hissed as he began to walk away but Ron pulled himself upright and snarled after his retreating back, calling out to him in the long corridor.
"Or else what? You'll send your horde of Death Eaters on me?"
The last few bits of Draco's patience snapped and his eyes were blazing as he stopped and glanced over his shoulder again at Ron, rewarding the taller boy with a deliberately taunting sneer.
"Or else…I'll screw Potter until she can't walk."
"Why you son of a—STUPEF—"
Draco whirled around sharply even before Ron had finished his intended spell and before the redhead could even point his wand properly at Draco, the blonde had already lifted his own wand quickly and easily retaliated with a counter-spell of his own – the first one that had come into his mind.
"CRUCIO!"
Even before the curse had left his wand, Draco had already realized his mistake and his eyes widened when Ron, his face pale at the Unforgivable Curse, crashed backward into a suit of armor to avoid it. A couple of students, most of them Gryffindor, had been passing by in the corridor as this happened and when Ron had stumbled into the suit of armor behind him, the rest of it came crashing down noisily onto the floor such that most of the other students around the corridor heard them. Soon enough, Draco found himself the recipient of dozens more shocked, angry glares from the other Hogwartian students and when Ron had finally picked himself up off the floor to look at him, the blonde Slytherin couldn't help but wince when he heard the next words out of the redhead's mouth.
"You…You…Death Eater Scum." Ron spat out as he steadied himself back up and pointed his wand directly at Draco again, his form trebling slightly as more Gryffindors walked up behind him. Draco recognized some of them as being in their year – Dean Thomas, Lavender Brown, and Parvati Patil – all of which were now looking at him with wide, shocked eyes and shaking their heads in anger.
Ron stood up to his full height and wiped the smudge of dirt off his cheek, glaring at Draco as though he was the most disgusting thing he had ever seen in his life. "You...dare to cast an Unforgivable in school…In plain view of everyone? Only a Death Eater would have the audacity…" He paused when he realized that more students had gathered around them and he spoke louder, his face twisting into an angry scowl. "I guess I shouldn't really be surprised…I just didn't think you could sink any lower, Malfoy…" He met Draco's eyes from where the blonde was standing several feet away and shook his head, well-aware that more and more students had begun to gather behind him to watch.
Horrified at what he had done and intimidated by the growing number of students who were beginning to crowd behind Ron and match the redheaded Gryffindor's shocked look of disdain for him, Draco began to back away slowly – his face paling as he shoved his wand back into his robe pocket.
"N—no…I didn't mean…I wasn't—" He stopped and winced when he had accidentally bumped himself into a large group of Hufflepuffs behind him, all of which looked ready to dismantle him at any moment. Justin Finch-Fletchley stood right at the center of the group and the minute he saw Draco's ashen features, the dark-haired Hufflepuff sneered cruelly at him, shaking his head in evident disgust.
"Go run back to your lot, Malfoy." He spat loudly and soon enough, when the rest of the watching students around them began to sneer and shout out the same curses and words of spite at him, Draco was left with no other choice but to look back up and meet all of their unrelenting faces.
As he expected, a lot of them were filled with nothing but hatred and disgust towards him and Draco was quite used to it all at that point but somewhere near the back of the crowd –behind some Ravenclaws – he thought he caught a glimpse of Theodore Nott and some of the other Slytherins in his year. Strangely enough, they were all smirking at him, watching him with a very strange look.
Draco didn't have enough time to dwell on their expressions any further, however, because soon the familiar barrage of insults came – words he thought he'd never have to hear again since he and Harry had called a truce and the Hogwarts Houses had begun to make friends amongst each other.
"DEATH EATER! I KNEW IT!"
"YOU'RE DEATH EATER SCUM, MALFOY! YOU DON'T BELONG HERE!"
"YOU SHOULD BE IN AZKABAN WITH THE REST OF THEM!"
"GO TO HELL, MALFOY! YOU'D BE MORE WELCOME THERE!"
His eyes stung with the tears of humiliation that threatened to spill out but, as he knew any Malfoy would, Draco did the only thing he could do – he kept his head up and quietly walked away, knowing that all the eyes following him would forever see him as the one thing he never wanted to be.
A Death Eater.
The ceiling of the hospital wing looked much whiter than Harry had remembered it.
As she stared blankly up at it, she was actually trying to listen to the hushed conversation on the other side of the curtain surrounding her bed. Just outside, near Madam Pomfrey's table, she could vaguely make out the sounds of Madam Pomfrey, Headmistress McGonagall and Andromeda's faint voices as they tried to discuss amongst themselves Harry's current condition and her available options.
"She could always abort the child of course…Should she deem herself not fit to raise it."
"How can you even consider such a thing? The immorality that would suggest—"
"We have magic, Headmistress…A magical abortion is not as dangerous as a muggle one. It would be quick, painless and easy…All I really need is to have both her and Draco's consent to do it."
"I am against it! I do not want to take an innocent life! Andromeda?"
"I will let the parents decide on the matter, Headmistress…I'm afraid I have no say in this."
A few times, Harry thought she heard the Headmistress protesting vehemently whenever Madam Pomfrey or Andromeda mentioned something along the lines of 'magical abortion' but then it would always be drowned out again by the other two women's shushing whispers. She also heard the hospital doors opening and closing a few times – followed by Hermione's soft voice – but then Harry had never allowed herself to get up from her bed and peer at them, much less talk to any of them.
Since she had found out about her pregnancy two days ago and Madam Pomfrey had discussed with both her and Draco their responsibilities, she hadn't left her bed, and even the act of eating itself was lost on her because no matter how hungry she was, she always pegged it to the disturbing fact that there was a baby growing inside her. She didn't want the child in there – in her – and it was the most disgusting, violating feeling in the world to have to be reminded of its existence in her every couple of minutes. Madam Pomfrey would routinely check up on her to make sure she was fine. The MediWitch would ask her if she was thinking about what she was going to do with the baby.
To be quite honest, Harry pretty much hadn't been thinking of anything else these days.
She knew she didn't want the baby, that much was certain, but then again she wasn't so sure anymore if ending the baby's life was truly the best decision she could make. If anything, Hermione's continued refusal to speak to her directly made Harry feel much worse and though her brown-haired best friend continued to visit her and help her with all her missed classes, Hermione never once spoke.
Even Ron and Luna had been worried when they noticed the obvious tension between them.
Unexpectedly however, the Weasleys and the Malfoys had yet to be informed of the entire situation and from the looks of things – judging from Andromeda and McGonagall's discussions – neither of them intended to inform the families any time soon. Luna, Ron and Hermione had all agreed to keep things to themselves and, should Harry push through with the abortion, would keep the whole matter under wraps so as to avoid anyone else in the Wizarding World ever knowing of such a scandal.
Since Madam Pomfrey had spoken to her and had asked her first if she wanted the Weasleys to know – the results of which of course ended with her refusal – Harry could only assume Draco had refused to inform his parents as well, since the Malfoys were also still uninformed about the situation.
Draco, surprisingly enough, had been completely quiet and withdrawn from her for the last two days and, other than how he had pleaded with her to reconsider her options that night, he hadn't come to see her since. A part of Harry wished she could ignore the dull ache in her chest at this but then again, another part of her was also relieved – relieved that she didn't have to face him just yet.
She didn't think she could possibly look at Draco in the eyes now, much less speak to him at all and even the very idea of him touching her made Harry freeze up like a cold marble statue. None of this was his fault but somehow, Harry was looking for a reason – any reason – to be able to pinpoint the blame on him anyway – if only because it would make things easier for her to think about.
But that's not the case now is it?
Harry sighed to herself again and tucked her hands behind her head as she looked up into the ceiling, watching silently as the faint flicker of the candle cast a few shadows around the small room. She recalled all of the things that she and Draco had learned about each other for the past couple of weeks, all that she had learned about him and all that he had learned about her. If she were to be completely honest with herself, she couldn't just deny that there wasn't anything in their relationship. There was and though she wasn't sure, she knew she had grown closer to him than she ever expected.
So do I want this child? She asked herself, closing her eyes as the thought plagued her mind.
The look in Draco's eyes that night, when he had pleaded with her to spare his son's life, had scared her somewhat and now more than ever, Harry was beginning to think the Slytherin was much more serious about his intentions for her than she ever could have realized. She hadn't meant for things to go as far as they did, and to be honest, she didn't even realize their relationship had gone to such extreme levels of intimacy. All Harry knew for certain was that she wasn't exactly sure how she felt about Draco yet, but she knew she didn't want to lose his companionship, whether romantic or not.
Does that truly make me queer? Harry asked herself after a moment's pause but then, just as she had answered Ron this before, she shook her head fiercely and covered her face with her hands.
Things are too complicated to narrow it down to that question alone. She reassured herself quietly, sighing and burying herself under her covers again as she tried to drown out her thoughts. It's unfair to even ask yourself such a question, Harry…How can I even be called queer when I'm like this? She nodded to herself again but even after the affirmation, her thoughts sounded so empty to her.
Am I…?
So far her only intimate encounter with men since she had been turned into a woman had been Draco and truly, if she were to be honest with herself, she could not have imagined doing anything else with any other man besides him. She found the idea itself disgusting really –wrong even – and that alone reassured her that it hadn't been only the female hormones that had caused all this.
There was something else.
Something that drew her to him and allowed him into her life.
She had let Draco touch her, and so she too was partly to blame for her current predicament.
I just can't believe this happened…I can't believe I did this to myself…What the fuck are you supposed to do now, Harry? She screamed at herself in exhaustion, shaking her head and burying her face into her pillows again when she felt the familiar tears of frustration welling up in her eyes.
She didn't want to cry, it was a sign of cowardice and weakness, but at this point she really couldn't think of anything else she could do. This baby was in her, growing, living and existing inside her, that much was certain, but whether or not this child is born or dies now lies entirely in her hands.
An innocent life – of her own flesh and blood – and she was about to sentence it to death.
It's not like I have any other choice here.
Harry tried not to wince when she recognized the panic and instinctive self-preservation in her own thoughts and closed her eyes again, trying to block out the whispers echoing around the room. A couple of feet away, the small window beside her bed was open slightly and from it, a thin stream of sunlight was pouring into the room, casting a faint beam of yellow light onto her bedside table. On it, there was a small goblet of water and as she reached for it, a coil of parchments caught her eye, causing Harry to pause mid-reach and take the parchments instead, holding it up for her to read.
She recognized Madam Pomfrey's handwriting easily, having received dozens of medical notes from her during her last few years at Hogwarts, but strangely, this one was more than a mere note. It contained her vital statistics, as well as a detailed record of her current health status and that of the baby. They were several rolls of parchment all bound together and as Harry unrolled the last one, the one with the information about the baby's condition, her eyes widened as she read through the notes.
It's a…boy…She realized quietly to herself as let out the intake of breath she had been holding in, her eyes roaming over the neatly written words. Her eyes widened even more as she read through the note's contents, feeling a strange yet bitter feeling of awe and wonder welling up inside her chest.
H—He's…He's…Harry had to blink rapidly to quell the tears that were beginning to blur her eyes as she read through Madam Pomfrey's detailed description of her baby, unconsciously thinking to herself that her child sounded like the most perfect, the most beautiful being ever to walk the planet.
Blonde… Green eyes… Ten toes, ten fingers… Healthy, steady heartbeat… And a seventy five percent chance of him being a parselmouth… Harry held back a dry, choked-up laugh and as though out of their own accord, her fingers tightened slowly around the parchment she still held. He… sounds… beautiful… perfect… If only…If only I could… Her eyes dimmed sadly again and she looked away sharply, setting the notes back down onto the table and sighing as she glanced out the window.
I don't want him born into a life in which he questions his mother's identity… Her eyes hardened again and she clenched her hands into fists, her nails digging painfully into her palms. I can't subject him to a life in which people will mock him for his family…Mock him for my condition…A life where he's deprived the joy of a proper family…A real family…A NORMAL family… Harry closed her eyes as a single tear escaped and strolled slowly down her cheek, falling listlessly onto the blankets.
I can't…I…I won't.
Her hand lingered gently over her stomach as she opened her eyes and looked down at her fingers, staring at them quietly as though she was waiting for what they were going to do. Soon enough, as she laid her hand gently on her stomach again, she began to whisper softly, feeling more desperate than how she remembered she felt the night she was to be killed by Lord Voldemort himself.
"I'm sorry…" Another tear cascaded down her cheek when she heard her own coarse whisper echoing in her ear but still she continued, stroking her stomach again as though she could try and make the child in her understand what she felt. "I'm so sorry…But…I can't be your mother… I just can't… I'm not…ready for this…I can't raise a child, I can't keep you, I'm so sorry…" Her voice broke at the end of her sentence and before she knew it, she was crying, and she buried her face in her hands.
"I cannot keep you…"
She cried quietly to herself for a few moments, relishing in the comforting silence of the room around her and in the realization that she was alone. Her cries were carefully muffled and restrained, barely audible from the rooms outside, and Harry struggled to keep it that way, keeping her face covered. After some time, a quick movement that caused the sunlight emanating from the window beside her bed to flicker caught her attention briefly, and she turned towards it, blinking away her tears. She saw a quick flash of white before it was gone and Harry blinked in confusion, reaching one of her hands up to wipe away the tears from her cheek. As she did this, she stopped and froze when she realized something, and only then did she figure out what that flash of white she had seen was.
A simple, purely white moth had rested itself peacefully onto the palm of her hand – right in the very center of it – and it had stretched out its wings and flattened them to the sides. Its touch was so light against her skin that Harry had barely even noticed it come in, much less settle itself against her. It was a small moth, barely taller than her thumb but its whiteness was unnerving –almost as though it were mocking her somehow with how clean and innocent it was, and that made her uneasy.
She stared at it for a very long time in silence, making sure to keep perfectly still lest the moth dislodged itself from her palm. Then, without thinking and without any palpable reason on her part, Harry suddenly closed her hand around the moth and killed it, feeling its softness crumbling against the strength of her grip and its white wings being crushed against the force of her fingernails.
If there was any expression on her face right then as she reopened her hand, it was somewhat akin to confusion and regret and as she stared at the crushed mush that had once been that white moth in her hand, Harry felt even more horrible – horrible for having just killed a defenseless creature. She swallowed the painful lump that had formed in her throat and felt even more tears beginning to blur her eyes; her chest suddenly heavy with the unspoken realization that was flooding her heart.
It was that easy.
Harry stood up and carefully set the body of the dead moth on the windowsill, watching silently as a gust of wind blew it away and it flew off into the air, fading completely from her sight. Then, she stood there and rested her elbows against the window, looking up into the clear blue sky.
An innocent…defenseless life…And it was that easy.
Her eyes wandered slowly until she found herself staring into her reflection against the window pane and she stiffened, meeting her own harsh green eyes and emotionless expression. And then she just watched herself, waiting desperately for her reflection to give her the answer she was hoping for.
START OF DREAM SEQUENCE
Draco was standing right in the middle of the Malfoy Manor gardens, watching silently as the beautiful crystalline fountain behind him continued to spout out streams of clean blue water. The sky was clear that day, with just a little bit of sunshine and the air felt good – crisp and light – that Draco allowed himself to enjoy the serenity of it all, sighing as he pulled his coat tighter around his frame.
He glanced towards Malfoy Manor again, looking at the large balcony windows which he knew were overlooking the gardens and he saw his parents there – his mother and father both looking and smiling at him, waving occasionally and exclaiming about how beautiful the garden truly was that day.
Draco smiled back at them and nodded, looking away just as he was about to sit himself down onto the ledge of the fountain behind him. A quick movement several feet away caught his attention, however, and this was followed by an adorable, mischievous giggle – one that caused Draco to look back up and trace his eyes slowly to the source of the sound. He had to look around him for several minutes before he found what he was looking for and he shook his head with a small grin, watching as a blonde, green-eyed boy – perhaps two or three years old – running around the large garden hedges.
The boy had stopped in the middle of his running and stood several feet in front of him, his green eyes sparkling with laughter as he looked up at Draco and gave him a wide, innocent smile. Walking over to where he was standing, Draco raised an eyebrow back at him and smiled, a little amused as he gestured to the stuffed basilisk the little boy was clutching tightly against his chest.
"What's the name of your friend, little guy?"
Giggling, the blonde boy clutched the stuffed toy tighter against him and smiled up at him.
"Nagini."
Draco nodded in understanding but a frown had marred his features somewhat at the name, recalling somewhere in the back of his mind that he had heard that name before – the name 'Nagini'. He shook his head at himself anyway and knelt down so that he was eye-level with the boy, reaching over and ruffling the child's sleek, platinum blonde locks until he giggled again, trying to move away.
He ran back several steps and stopped, just by the entrance to the maze of tall green hedges that went about the entire garden. Looking back at Draco, the boy was jumping up and down excitedly and was gesturing to the maze entrance with a smile, his high voice seeming to echo in the silence.
"Mommy! Mommy here!" He squealed and began pointing again, waiting impatiently as Draco laughed at his eagerness and nodded, walking over towards him and taking the small hand the little boy offered him. "Alright, alright…Show me where your mother is then, little guy…" He agreed, allowing himself to be pulled along as the boy began to lead him surprisingly well through the maze.
They twisted and turned a couple of times and strangely, by the middle of it all, Draco's eyebrows had began to fuse together in confusion – especially as he realized that the maze seemed to stretch on forever and that the hedges seemed much, much taller than he remembered them to be. At one point, the little boy had led him right into a part of the maze where they had to walk around a circular path – akin to a spiral – and that was when Draco began to feel uneasy and walk a bit faster.
There was something strange about this place, something that was definitely not right.
"Where are we going?" He directed his question at the little boy leading him by his hand but the boy just smiled at him again, shaking his blonde head and merely pointing his tiny fingers forward.
"Mommy!"
` Draco felt a familiar prickly sensation at the back of his neck as he listened to the boy's giggles again, unable to do anything else but follow him carefully until they finally came to a clearing – a small, circular area with another fountain at the very middle. The fountain was beautiful – made of expensive marble and adorned with tiny, cherubim that were fashioned as though they were pouring water into the fountain from the tiny jars they held in their hands. As they approached it, the boy had let go of his hand and rushed toward it, squealing happily as he ran off before Draco could stop him.
"W—wait…Where are you—" Draco stopped when he saw that the boy had rushed into the arms of a woman – a pale, beautiful dark-haired woman who was seated by the edge of the fountain. Her hair was long, cascading gracefully against her back just above the curve of her waist, and her eyes were luminescent, greener than all the grass and plants that surrounded them around the garden.
She was smiling and laughing as the little boy launched himself right into her arms, wrapping his hands around her neck and allowing her to lift him up until she was holding him to her chest. Then, she stroked his hair lovingly, her eyes soft as she planted a gentle kiss onto the top of the boy's head.
As this happened, Draco stood back and watched them from a safe distance, his eyes wide and a soft smile lingering on his face as he relished the tender scene. The boy's mother was beautiful, even more beautiful than the roses that surrounded her, and for the life of him, Draco could not tear his eyes away from her, mesmerized by her movements and the way her hair danced with the breeze.
He saw where the little boy had gotten his bright green eyes, and they were the most enchanting shade of emeralds, captivating even the coldest heart with its intensity. Then, as Draco was staring at them, both those pairs of emerald eyes turned to stare at him and he inadvertently reddened, shifting uneasily when the boy's mother suddenly smiled and beckoned him over to them.
She lifted her free hand and held it gently towards him, her eyes soft as she spoke to him.
"My love…?"
A slight blush stained the paleness of his cheeks but before he lost his nerve, Draco smiled back at her and took a step towards them, reaching his trembling hand out so he could grasp hers.
"I'm here…"
Just as he had managed approach her, however, Draco gasped when instead of answering him, the dark-haired woman just winced – as though in excruciating pain – and stumbled away. The little boy she had held in her arms had slid back to the floor and to add to Draco's horror, he just stood there, watching gleefully as his mother's face crumpled in pain and she clutched at her sides, pulling her hand away only to find it covered in her own blood. Her eyes widened and she stared at the little boy in a mixture of confusion, horror and heartbreak, watching helplessly as he looked up at his mother again and smiled innocently at her, his eyes glinting as he held up the knife in his tiny hands.
"I want a hug, Mommy…"
The woman gasped at him, her face pale and her body dying away quickly as she walked backwards, desperate to get away as the little boy drew even nearer towards her with the knife outstretched. She was stumbling along and leaving blood stains all over the grass as she tried to get away from him, unknowingly backing herself closer and closer against the fountain's ledge. In his horror, Draco was already rushing towards her but it was all happening too fast and before he could even reach her, she had already screamed as the little boy stabbed her again – this time right in her chest – and she finally fell backwards, teetering right against the edge of the fountain behind her.
Draco realized he was screaming because then, even as he was racing towards them, they seemed to get even farther away and he could only watch as the little boy gave his mother one last smile before he yanked his knife out of her chest and shoved her – right into the fountain's clear water. She fell right in with a loud, mocking splash and when Draco reached the ledge, he reached desperately into the water for her body, his cries and screams incoherent as he tried to reach for her.
"NO! NO, PLEASE—O—OH MERLIN!" He gasped and pulled his hand away sharply when he realized that the fountain's water had now turned itself into an eerie shade of blood red and without meaning to, Draco screamed again, stumbling backwards from the fountain and falling to the ground.
"N—NO…NO…NO!"
Draco was crying now and he trembled, completely helpless, as the little boy let out a loud laugh – one that was certainly not the high-pitched giggles Draco heard before but one that was harsh and maniacal, the laugh of a man who had split his soul into seven by killing all those innocent lives.
"N—no…No, it can't be…No…"
The little boy turned to look at him slowly and at once, Draco felt rooted in place – paralyzed by so much terror that he couldn't even breathe. Those green eyes, those beautiful bright green eyes the little boy had gotten from his mother were gone now and in their place, Draco found himself staring right into the evil, blood-red eyes of the very man he had once recognized to be his master.
"V—Voldemort…"
The Dark Lord then smiled eerily at him, his red eyes glowing even brighter at Draco's pale features and the way the blonde was shaking so much that he could barely stand up or speak properly.
"Hello Father…"
"No…No!" Draco turned away sharply and soon he was running, as fast as he possibly could, away from that horrible snake-like voice and away from that echoing, maniacal laughter behind him. He heard those tiny toddler, footsteps chasing right after him, forcing the blonde to run even faster.
"JUST GET AWAY! JUST GET AWAY FROM ME!"
"Aw…Father…Is that any way to talk to your son?"
Draco heard another round of that horrible, deep-voiced laughter before he stumbled, stubbing his left foot against a loose rock on the ground and crashing painfully right onto the grass. He scrambled to gather himself back up, however, but just as he stood up, the Dark Lord's hissing voice spoke to him again and this time, he heard it as though it was being whispered into his ear.
"I ssssssseeee you… Father…"
When Draco looked up with wide, terrified gray eyes, the grotesque face of a half-snake, half-human child was leering down at him. Just as Draco had opened his mouth to scream, the creature had expanded its gigantic snake-like mouth and snarled loudly, ready to devour his entire form whole.
"NO! NO, GET AWAY! NO, PLEASE!"
END OF DREAM SEQUENCE
"NO!"
Draco's screams echoed in the silence of his bedroom as he jerked himself awake, his heart pounding rapidly against his chest and his entire body drenched with sweat. He was trembling as he pulled himself back up into a sitting position and took several inhales of breath, blinking several times as he tried to reassure himself that it had only been a dream and that he was safe in his dorm room.
It took him several minutes for him to actually calm down but even when he did, he gasped sharply again when something began burning right against the skin of his arm – the Dark Mark – and he winced as he yanked the sleeves of his pajamas to reveal it, dark and blatant against his pale skin.
"It's happening again…"
Draco lifted his gaze slowly and settled his eyes on the dark night sky that was seen from the open curtains draped over his bedroom window. A full moon was out that night and he stared at it, his body still trembling in the aftermath of his nightmare but his eyes darkening slowly in fierce resolve.
"I'll stop them."
A/N: Another uneventful, chapter – something I like to call a 'plot-filler' since they're written to keep the plot moving even though nothing really major happens. In any case, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter anyway and I promise I'll try to finish the next one out faster than I did this one. Oh, and if you're wondering, I decided to move Andromeda's conversation with Draco to the next chapter. :D
Next Chapter: Andromeda talks to Draco, Draco is approached by his former friends in Slytherin (Oooh. Let's see what happens. ^_~), and Harry makes her decision about the baby :D
PLEASE REVIEW, DARLINGS! CHEERS! :D
