Blllaaaaaagggggghhh. So much emmootttiooonnnn. I don't know if I did it justice. I hope I did. It's really draining to write something like this, even though I already had part of it written from forever ago. Pack-ratting old files for the win! Whoooo!

*composes self* Now, sad :(


Al guessed that it was Mustang that had called Ed. Perhaps it was Riza, but it wasn't him or Mei. Either way, within a day of… the miscarriage, there was an insistent pounding on the door of the hotel. Their train back to Xing wouldn't arrive for another few days. In the light of what had happened, Al was being excused from the meetings and was going to be traveling back to Xing with Mei.

He didn't want to get up and answer the door and was feeling rather uncharitable towards the person doing the pounding. It wasn't until he opened the door that he realized just how much he wanted to see his brother.

"Al?" Ed seemed surprised. He looked down at himself briefly. Okay, sure he was still wearing the shirt and pants he had thrown on in a minute flat before rushing Mei out of the apartment. And sure they were probably wrinkled and stained. And his eyes were probably pinky, puffy, and hollow.

"Brother? What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here? Al! What, did you think I wouldn't care that my little brother… Al…" Then Ed threw his arms around his younger brother.

Al was stiff and no quite sure how to respond before he responded with just as tight a hug. "I'm so sorry, Al."

He felt the sting of tears in the back of his eyelids and did his best to keep them back. He wouldn't cry again. He just held on tighter. Even now, years later when they had their own lives separate from each other… Ed was still such a pillar of strength for him, Al couldn't help but feel slightly better with him there.

"Where's Mei?"

"She's inside on the couch. Neither of us have really moved since…" Ed nodded and moved into the room, instantly spotting the black head curled up on the couch.

"Mei?" She turned at Al's voice and frowned slightly when she saw Ed.

"Edward?"

"Hey, beansprout." Al almost wanted to face palm. At a time like this? He thought that was only his crazy therapy trick with Granny, and almost told him off, but Mei lifted her nose in the air.

"Rice-boy."

Ed opened his mouth to respond with another insult, but he caught Al's eye and he shook his head. Then he raised an eyebrow at the box Ed had in his hand. Ed grinned and lifted it up higher.

"Winry sent an apple pie. What do you say we exploit my wife's cooking?"


"She wanted to come when we heard, but Tammy's still so young we couldn't leave her with a babysitter like we could with Benny and Sara. Though we'd have to find some sort of saint to take on both of them and a baby. So she had to stay back. I hoped on the first train up here. I'm lucky the ticket master likes me. I wouldn't have stood for someone running into the station as the train's about to take off demanding passage with a freshly baked pie in one hand. I would have stolen the pie at least." Al smiled weakly as he took another bite of pie.

Sure enough, it tasted delicious. He was sure it would have been better if it was hot, but it was still amazing. And somehow comforting.

Mei had only taken a bite before pushing it away.

"Mei, you should at least finish the piece. It tastes good, I swear."

"I don't doubt that, Alphonse. Winry made it…"

Ed grinned as if he were the one being complimented.

"I just… I'm not in the mood."

"Are you sur—"

"Yes, Al, I'm sure." She stood up and nodded at both men. "Thanks for coming Ed, we appreciate it. Tell Winry… thanks." She gave them a brief smile before turning around and leaving the room.

Al half got out of his chair to follow her, but then he fell back down in his own seat and dropped his face into his hands.

"I don't know what to do," he whispered. "I hate this. I hate it. I'm so helpless Ed. I don't know what to do… what I can do to make this better. Everything was going so great and then all of a sudden everything's ruined. I want to make things better, but I'm so cut up inside myself. I wish there was something I could go out and do, something to work on that could make this better, but nothing… "

"Al—"

"Don't worry, Brother, I'm not going to try anything stupid. But… I'm so… devastated. And I'm trying so hard to be the strong one for the both of us, but I'm just…" He buried his face in his hands again.

There was silence, until Al felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Al, if she's anything like you, she's trying to be the strong one so that you don't have to be. The thing she wants and fears most if for you to break down."

"… am I you and she's me?"

"We found our happy ending, didn't we?"

Al snorted slightly, but smiled. "Yeah. Though it doesn't exactly feel like it right now."

"If you're in pain, you're alive."

"… Gee, thanks Ed."


Just when Al thought things were starting to get better, they walked in the door of their house.

Ling and Lan Fan had met them at the train station, apparently having actually snuck away from the guards under the pretense of "having a moment" and slipped onto the streets in civilian clothing to come and meet them. Lan Fan was confident enough in her ability to keep him safe to go along with the escapade. It was almost a bit of a shock, to see Ling in his old outfit from Amestris. Lan Fan wasn't exactly wearing her old guard's uniform, but it was obvious that she was more comfortable in her current garb than she would ever be in any Empress regalia.

The first thing Ling did was hug his younger sister.

It seemed like he had the same effect on her that Ed had for Al, because she clung tightly to him, and though she was wiping moisture from her eyes when she pulled away, she did look a little better. Maybe it was just the Xingese air. Maybe it really was her brother.

Lan Fan hugged the princess as well, and Al found himself being embraced by the Emperor of Xing.

"Thanks Ling," he whispered before he let him go.

"Of course. How are you?"

"… Hanging on." He nodded.

"We should leave, talk somewhere else. The guards might think to check here when they find out that we're gone."

They had a conversation at one of the local restaurants over bowls of rice. Al was hopeful that thing were looking better, before they returned home.

She seemed to freeze when they entered their room to drop off their luggage.

"Mei?"

He winced when he caught sight of the cradle he had been in the process of constructing. It had been a bit of a challenge for himself. No alchemy involved or allowed. He knew he wouldn't be able to do it from scratch per say, but he did have a professional lend him all the parts he would need to stick it together.

It was only half constructed, more a mini-boat and the frame to hold it. He wasn't even close to putting it all together yet, he had wanted to get a bit more advice before moving onto that step.

"Mei…"

She just shook her head and left the room. He dropped the bags he was carrying and simply put his arms around her when he found her curled up on their couch and kissed her head.


"Mei?"

She was just sitting in the room again. They hadn't been very far along in upgrading the ground floor guest room into a nursery, but there was a rocking-chair, a bed, and the pieces of the cradle. She was sitting in the rocking chair, holding onto a blanket that she had been in the process of making herself.

"Yes, Alphonse?" she answered, not looking up or moving her gaze at all.

"Mei…"

"What, Al?" she snapped, now glaring at him. He walked over and knelt down in front of her, gently prying the blanket out of her hands. She was holding onto it tightly and wouldn't let go.

"No, don't take it…"

"Mei, you have to let go of it."

"No, I can't…"

"Please!" he shouted, grabbing onto her hands. "You can't keep doing this! You can't… I need my wife back… please Mei."

She stared at him with hollow eyes that weren't seeing.

"Please Mei." He was crying again. Couldn't she tell that watching this happen to her was hurting him? That the vacant expression was tearing him apart. He felt so hopeless.

"I can't Al… I can't."

Now she was crying too. Hadn't they both run out of tears by now? She was wrapping her arms around his neck and crying into his hair. It was getting wet and so was her shirt. She hadn't been wearing her usual brightly colored dresses and Xingese-style shirts. Instead she had been wearing some of his old shirts that didn't fit her very well and hid the fact that there was no longer any life growing inside of her.

"Neither can I," he muttered. "I walk around and all I see is you telling me that you were pregnant, laughing about the names we were coming up with, you getting mad that none of your clothes would fit… there's too many memories here… I just can't…"

"I can't…"

And they spent the night crying together, trying to draw comfort from each other. Eventually they fell asleep, neither in comfortable positions. Halfway through the night Al woke up and carried his wife to their bed where he collapsed and fell asleep again, crying into the already wet pillows.


It was morning when Mei woke up. For a moment she was sure that everything was going to be alright, until the events of the past few days came rushing back in. She remembered the pain, the blood, and the devastation. For a moment all she wanted was to curl up and continue to cry, but she forced herself to stand up and walk to the kitchen where there was a wonderful smell.

She stumbled in and sat down in a chair. Al was standing at the filthy stove (neither of them had been cleaning anything lately), most likely creating the smells. Without a word he transferred whatever it was he was making onto two plates and set one down in front of her and the other in front of him.

She grabbed the fork (why a fork, she wondered absentmindedly), and looked blankly and the plate in front of her. Eggs. She felt the strange desire to laugh. It was so simple. Eggs, scrambled. Crack the egg open, drop it into the pan, throw away the shell. Push the yoke around in the pan until it was all cooked and fluffy. Season to heart's desire.

She was sure that Al had seasoned the eggs (he rarely let anything go unseasoned), but she couldn't taste any of it. Ever since… that, she had been having trouble picking up individual tastes. Maybe she should be worried about it.

"I think we need to leave."

Mei looked up. Al had dropped his fork onto his plate and was staring at her with determination.

"What do you mean?"

"There are too many painful memories here. We need to get away for a bit. Be with other people." He looked so unhappy. "We can go anywhere in the East or in Amestris. See anyone. Please…"

Mei didn't answer and she could saw his shoulder's drop and heard his sigh.

"I agree."

"What?" he said sharply, head shooting up.

"Yes." She met his eyes carefully. She couldn't stay here much longer either. There was just too much to deal with. Call it running away if you want, but she had to get away. "But I have one request."

She didn't even know what made her think of it, but as soon as she did she knew it was the right choice. When he nodded and she told him his face softened and he nodded.

"I'll start packing."


It was bright and there was hardly a cloud in the sky. Even a few children were running around in the street. Al made sure to address Mei's attention elsewhere so she wouldn't see them, but from the look on her face he could tell that it didn't work.

Finally they reached their destination. He walked up the walkway and knocked on the door a few times. It only took a few seconds for it to open.

"Alphonse… what are you two doing here?"

"Hi, Teacher. I know it's slightly intrusive, but… would you mind if we stayed here for a week or two?"


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