Disclaimer: As always I own nothing but the original characters and the situations I put them in. Everything else belongs to somebody else and that's just the way it is. Thanks so much for reading, my best to all, and have a great day.

Twenty Eighth Act

CQueen: So once again we find ourselves together. Have you all been missing me horribly?

Yachiru: You always ask that question and the answer always stays the same. No we didn't miss you. We want you dead or dying in some ditch where the rats can feast upon your evil, twisted remains.

Hinamori: Well that's a little harsh.

Hitsugaya: Yes, just dead and buried would be fine with us.

CQueen: Well sorry I'm not dead yet.

Ukitake: And she doesn't even have to die really, if she would just stop-

General: No, she has to die. It's been decided.

Kyoraku: But she does occasionally write some very nice things, Sir.

Nanao: Quiet, Sir. The General has spoken.

Kyoraku: But, Nanao chan.

Nanao: Don't 'But Nanao chan' me.

CQueen: Yeah, messing with her is never a good idea, Shunsui. And you look silly enough without her rearranging your face into a mosaic. It's a nice face.

Soifon: And the longer we chat the longer we have to wait for the stupid songs to begin. So everyone just shut up and let the woman work.

CQueen: Thank you, Captain.

Soifon: I didn't do it for you. I just want to get this thing over with again.

CQueen: Yeah, I know that, but still, thanks.

Byakuya: So as her thanks will you get on with it, please?

CQueen: I suppose, especially since you said please. So for the first song I'm going to introduce you to a song many of you probably have never heard of, from a movie you've probably didn't know existed. The movie is called "The Gnome Mobile" and the song is called "Riding Along In The Gnome Mobile". It will be sung by all members of the Gotei, since they've been missing the fun so much.

**head bang and the members of the Gotei appear onstage**

The Gotei:

The Hollow Masks, the Hollow Masks
Hunting for baddies in the Hollow Masks
Sooner or later we feel that we'll
Find where they are with the Hollow Masks

In the Hollow Masks, the Hollow Masks
Hunting for baddies in the Hollow Masks
Sooner or later we feel that we'll
Find where they are in the Hollow Masks

As we race along through the countryside
We're keeping our peepers open wide
Looking to find where they may hide
The Arrancar baddies who are going to die

In the Hollow Masks, the Hollow Masks
We're hunting for baddies in the Hollow Masks
Sooner or later we feel that we'll
Find where thye are in the Hollow Masks

Oh, the Hollow Masks is a deadly thing
The like, of which, I have never seen!
But you're not too fast, you big dumbie
When I look where I'm going that's where you be!

In the Hollow Masks, the Hollow Masks
We're hunting for baddies in the Hollow Masks
Sooner or later we feel that we'll
Find where they roam in the Hollow Masks

In the Hollow Masks, the Hollow Masks
We're hunting for baddies in the Hollow Masks
Sooner or later we feel that we'll
Find where they roam in the Hollow Masks

**head bang to return them to their seats**

CQueen: Now that was creativity, don't you think?

Hisagi: And it was originally about hunting gnomes? What are gnomes?

Nemu: They're small, mystical creatures who are said to resemble humans somewhat. Rather like an elf or a leprechaun.

Matsumoto: Gotta love elves, especially their pointy little ears.

Hitsugaya: You and pointy ears.

Nanao: Enough about the pointy ears. Can we just get back to whatever new song she's got lined up after this one? I just want to get this over with.

Ukitake: I'd like to know what the next song is too.

CQueen: Which is another way of asking me to hurry things up, right?

Ukitake: Well I...

CQueen: Don't worry, I like your way of moving me along much better than hers. And since I'm going to see a movie shortly I figure I'll let you keep this chapter moving quickly. The second song has been highly requested as well, but I could never decide who to use it for. The song is from "Aladdin" and it's called "A Whole New World". It will be sung by Karin and Histugaya.

**head bang and Hitsugaya and Karin appear onstage dressed in Middle Eastern garbs **

Hitsugaya: I can show you the world
Shining shimmering splendid
Tell me, Karin, now when did
you last let your heart decide

I can open your eyes
Take you wonder by wonder
Over, sideways, and under
On a magic carpet ride
A whole new world
A new fantastic point of view
No one to tell us no
Or where to go
Or say we're only dreaming

Karin: A whole new world
A dazzling place I never knew
But when I'm way up here
It's crystal clear
That now I'm in a whole new world
With you

Hitsugaya: Now I'm in a whole new world with you

Karin: Unbelievable sights
Indescribable feeling
Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling
Through an endless diamond sky
A whole new world

Hitsugaya: Don't you dare close your eyes

Karin: A hundred thousand things to see

Hitsugaya: Hold your breath- it gets better

Karin: I'm like a shooting star, I've come so far I can't go back to where i used to be

Hitsugaya: A whole new world

Karin: Every turn a surprise

Hitsugaya: With new horizons to pursue

Karin: Every moment red-letter

Both: I'll chase them anywhere,
There's time to spare,
Let me share this whole new world with you

Hitsugaya: A whole new world

Karin: A whole new world

Hitsugaya: That's where we'll be

Karin: That's where we'll be

Hitsugaya: A thrilling chase

Karin: A wondrous place

Both: For you and me

**head bang and the two return to their seats**

CQueen: Don't they make such a cute couple?

Ichigo: No, they really don't.

Karin: Let's just drop it, okay? Isn't it better to just get through these? You know fighting amongst ourselves gets us nowhere.

CQueen: Yeah, especially since I don't think your torture is going to go on much longer, guys. I really am starting to run out of songs to inspire more chapters. I've used up most of my favourites by now, all the good ones anyway. Plus I don't like using songs I can't alter and make my own.

Soifon: Finally, some good news.

General: How much longer do you intend to torture us, huh?

CQueen: Well I'm toying with stopping after the thirtieth act. Either that or the hundredth song. Time will tell of course. I'm a fickly writer sometimes.

Ishida: And then after that you'll stop torturing us?

CQueen: Well there's still is a couple unfinished BLEACH fics, remember? But you don't figure into them much so I suppose you shouldn't be terribly worried. You aren't one of my favourite characters after all.

Ishida: Which I'm thankful for, believe me.

Ichigo: Lucky bastard.

CQueen: You too, as you'll recall. I mostly leave you alone as well. In fact, you have nothing to complain about except for the fact that I've been known to find your sisters boyfriends.

Ichigo: Which is crime enough, you know.

CQueen: Yeah, yeah, so you've told me, Carrot Top.

Isshin: He's such a good big brother. His mother would be so, so proud!

Ichigo: Dad, don't you dare do one of your mother rants.

CQueen: And to insure that doesn't happen we'll go to the next and final song for this act. It's from the film "Hocus Pocus" and is called "Come Little Children." It will be sung by Aizen, who I've been neglecting far too much as well. I hope you enjoy it.

Aizen:

Come Little Arrancars

I'll Take Thee Away, Into A Land

Of Enchantment

Come Little Arrancars

The Time's Come To Play

Here In My Desert

Of Power

Follow Sweet Arrancars

I'll Show Thee The Way

Through All The Pain And

The Sorrows

Weep Not Poor Arrancars

For Life Is This Way

Murdering Beauty And

Passions

Hush Now Dear Arrancars

It Must Be This Way

Too Weary Of Life And

Deceptions

Rest Now My Arrancars

For Soon We'll Away

Into The Calm And

The Quiet

Come Little Arrancars

I'll Take Thee Away, Into A Land

Of Enchantment

Come Little Arrancars

The Time's Come To Play

Here In My Desert

Of Shadows

**head bang and Aizen returns to seat**

Cqueen: And that is that for another day. Any last thoughts or questions before we call it a night, everyone?

Yachiru: Yeah, can you die now, please?

Cqueen: I love you guys too, ciao!

**and so ends the latest act**