Update! We are almost over with their story, but I have more ideas around my brain for new ones
"Bella, Bella" I could hear voices calling my name
Little by little I began to open my eyes and above me I could see three worried faces looking expectantly at me. Jessica, Angela and Edward. Edward?
"What are you doing here?" I said sitting up abruptly
"Hey hey" He said while helping me up since I was currently on the floor "Easy there, you just took a nasty fall" He then pushed my hair away from my face. My skin was on fire with his touch, but I pulled away from him, hurt evident in his eyes.
"Shouldn't you be in Germany?" I asked walking to a nearby chair an taking a seat "What are you doing here?"
"I…I…" He stuttered suddenly looking at anything but me
"He came to see you" Angela said from her spot on the room. I had almost forgotten they were there.
"He came to stop you from getting married" Jessica said
"Married?" I asked confused "I am not getting married. Jess is getting married, to your friend"
"I know" He said looking ashamed "I mean, now I know. I just thought you were getting married and I…I…"
"You suddenly decided to care again?" I replied. Poison evident in my voice. "Angela, Jess, can you give us a minute?" We needed to have this conversation alone.
"Sure" Angela answered pulling Jessica by her hand and exiting the room
"So, what are you really doing here Edward?" I said standing and facing him
"I told you. I saw Jessica's photo on Facebook and I just read getting ready for the wedding on the caption and you were wearing those face wedding veils and I panicked" By this time he was rambling "And then I called you and you didn't answer. I had to talk with you. You could not get married Bella. You can't" His voice acquiring a panicked toned by this point "I got scared. Just thinking of you getting married to someone, to anyone but me makes me want to crawl. I thought I had lost you to someone else. And when I found out you were not getting married I was so relieved, but I realized it's not you this time, but what if you had been? I could not handle that. Please don't"
I COULDN'T?! Oh the nerve of him
"Wat?!" I asked raising my voice "I'll do whatever the fuck I want okay? And, what do you even care? You disappeared on me. You left Edward! You left okay?!"
"You knew I could not let the opportunity pass!" We were screaming loudly by now
"I now! And I wouldn't have asked you to stay but.."
"Exactly!" He said pulling at his hair "You didn't even ask me! Didi you even wanted me to?"
"Of course I did!" A lump forming in my throat from all the anger I was feeling "How can you ask me that? And you didn't asked me to wait for you either! I would have waited for you, but you know what? I've waited for you long enough now Edward!" Oh no, the tears were coming "And I am just so tired of waiting for something that might never happen. I just can't do it anymore. I don't think I could take it"
"No, Bella" His voice softening and coming closer to me "Of course I wanted for you to wait, but it would not have been fair for me to ask" He was now brushing my tears away from my face
"I wanted you to ask" I said placing my head on his chest, exhausted by now.
"I wanted you to ask too" He said wrapping his arms around me
We stood like that for God know how long before I pulled away from him and told him the truth neither of us wanted to hear.
" I need to let you go" I said looking at him
" No, Bella, we can make this work, I know we can"
"I am with someone else"
"The man from your pictures?" He asked, suddenly aging 20 years
"Yes" I said "Riley, he is a good man. He loves me"
"Do you love him?" He asked coming closer, suddenly his mouth pressed against my ear "Do you love him like you could love me?" He whispered, and I suddenly realize I didn't. I would never love Riley like he deserved. Loving him would be so easy, so comfortable. And I began to cry, why couldn't I love Riley? Why couldn't I forget the man standing in front of my, why wouldn't my heart let me?
"It doesn't matter"
"Yes it does!" He said placing his hands on my shoulders and looking at me "Give us a chance"
"Not like this" I said trying to clean my face "We all deserve better than this Edward. You, Riley and myself" I realized I had gone wrong about the whole thing since the beginning. I need to go back to California, and put my life back in order. I needed to be myself for some time.
—
Next morning I took a flight back to LA. I had to sort things out as soon as possible. Riley picked me up from the airport, no questions asked and when we arrived to my apartment he began to talk, he knew something was up.
"So?" He asked taking a seat "What is going on? Why do you look like you are about to cry?"
"I am so sorry" I said while the tears flowed freely down my face "I am such a horrible person Riley. I am so sorry"
"Hey, hey hey, what is going on Bella? You are scaring me" He said taking me into his arms and making me seat next to him on the couch "You are not a horrible person"
"Yes I am" I cried harder "I…I have to break up with you"
"No you don't" He said sweetly, making this thing a lot much harder "Why do you say that? Are you scared because I asked you to move in with me? You don't have to, we can take things slower"
"It's not that" I said "I don't think I can love you like you want me to Riley"
"How do you know that? You are just what I need" He said leaning towards my face
"No" I said "You deserve someone that can love you with all of their hearts, and as much as I would like to be that person I am not. I wish I could, believe me, there is nothing I would like more, but it's not fair to you or to me"
"There is someone else" He said. It was not a question.
"It's not what you are thinking. I have not seen him in a long time, but there is someone else, and I am afraid there will always be. I am sorry"
"So am I"
—
That was the last day I ever saw Riley Biers. We broke up and never talked again. I spent the whole winter break crying for something I could not have, and afraid of not being able to have it ever. I was the day before the semester started again when I snapped out of it. I was cleaning my room when something fell out of one of my books. It was a note that my dad had written to me when I first came down to California for college.
Isabella, I know you will thrive in this new chapter of your life. You always do.
I still remember your first day at kinder garden, it feels like it all over again, my baby girl going out to the world, and even tough I won't be there to protect you I rest because I know you don't need me to any longer.
And when you need help you can always count on my shoulder to lean, but remember that the strength you need the most is the one inside you.
You stand by yourself, you shine without help.
Believe in yourself.
Love, Dad.
And then I finally understood, I had done it wrong all this time. My happiness depended only on myself. All this time I had relied on others to be happy. My parents, my friends, Edward. It was time for me to stand by myself, to shine.
