The next few days were nothing but torture for both Draco and Hermione. After their big fight, they barely spoke one word to each other, unless they were Head business. Hermione decided that she would shoulder the work on the Graduation Ball, while he could take charge of the remedial. She said it was better to divide tasks between themselves, for less work load. Frankly she just doesn't want him around her whenever she's working. So she gave him a completely different job.
Draco was giving her exactly what she wanted. He was far away from her. His profession of love was the biggest risk he ever had to make, and it took all of his courage to do so. But as a result she answered him by casting him away. He took it as it was that she didn't feel the same, when he was certain she did. He felt like a complete and utter fool. And so he did what she wanted, by staying as far from her as possible. It was for his own good too, he supposed. He's already hurt enough; he couldn't bear to make it worse.
Everyone saw it too. Blaise, Theo and Pansy were as devastated as he was. They were the ones who had to see what it was doing to Draco. What saddened them most is that he wasn't even lashing out on anybody. Normally when Draco was mad and hurt he would start a fight and throw fits. This was different, this was deeper. He was just quiet, smirking at jokes every now and then, but all for show. His smirk never reached his eyes, the sign of his true happiness. But they let him, let him sulk in the heartbreak, just hoping that he'll get over it on his own. Blaise and Pansy didn't dare show their affection when Draco was around. Although he did say that it was alright, that he didn't mind, and that they could pretend he wasn't there but still, they knew him. They knew almost everything reminded him of her.
Meanwhile Ginny and Harry understood why Hermione was overworking herself with the Graduation Ball, she was trying to keep herself busy so she wouldn't think of Draco. She studied for OWLs even more so than she normally did, which meant she looked like a workaholic borderline to insane. She spent a lot of time in the library, if not studying, sending letters and writing plans, all stacked as tall as a house elf. They would know, they saw Winky try to help her carry them to her chambers, and needless to say, it didn't get there in the same state that it was. Ginny volunteered to help her organize the ball, telling her that she needed some time to herself every now and then, but Hermione refused. According to her and she meant no offense, but this was their ball. And that Ginny could plan hers next year. Normally that would have made her furious, shutting her out like that when she's already offering a hand, but still she knew her. She needed this distraction.
Surprisingly, even Ron has taken a hint of all of the sadness Hermione is going through. Admittedly, he is glad their relationship is over. They were an ill match. To him, it was only a matter of proximity that made them think it was possible for them to be together. And now that they're not, he still couldn't help but feel sorry for her. At Draco, maybe a little bit.
Even the professors, including Dumbledore, have seen the change. Snape saw how completely awkward it was when they worked for potions in class together that he decided to switch them at the end. It's not as though it affected their work, they did well, still better than all of his other students combined, but it certainly would have been exceptional if they actually talked to one another. He wasn't pairing up students just because he wanted to, it was actually a learning tactic. But he could not force them. Gone too soon, they said. But they didn't interfere, they were way over that phase. So they didn't bother to talk to either Heads. They knew the two would know what's best for themselves and for their duties. And if it means for them to be even less than civil, then so be it.
Days turned into weeks and weeks into months, and it was all a sad, depressing blur for everybody. But especially for two people.
One night Hermione finally decided to go back to the Head Common Room after formulating her plans for the Graduation Ball. She looked out the window and was shocked to see that it was already night time. She sighed and put all her quills, books and scrolls inside her bag, apologized to Madam Pince for overstaying (again), and went back to her dormitories. Surely Draco would be cooped up inside his room right now; there was no point for him to stay in the Common Room anyway. They already had a silent agreement that made them see less of each other. So far it has worked. She felt okay now. Sometimes. She was thinking of making a cup of hot chocolate before bed when she was about to open the door when she heard a laugh. It was Draco's.
"Are you serious?" She heard him say. "That's bloody hilarious!"
She's never heard him laugh that much since, well, since before everything crumbled. Hermione wondered who he was talking to. What if it was a girl? Her stomach went all in knots. She had no right to be pissed if he had moved on but, well, she's already pissed.
"Took him long enough. And to take her to our Common Room? Making it a bit obvious, aren't you?" She mumbled to herself. She huffed and made sure she would reprimand both of them for doing… whatever it is they are doing in her Common Room. She was about to start nagging when he saw Draco, guffawing with a young boy who was making weird facial expressions.
"No Dylan, you have to eat, eat all you want. I swear your mother doesn't feed you enough. You will eat until I cannot see your cheekbones you hear?" The boy said. He had hair as dark and eyes as blue as Harry's, he only needed the glasses to look exactly like Harry was during their early years at Hogwarts. They stopped dead of their conversation when they saw her enter.
"Oh, is it that late already?" Draco said. He knew Hermione deliberately came back to their room that late so that she wouldn't see him. It has become a routine that as soon as he eats dinner, he does his homework and Head duties in his bedroom. He'd sometimes faintly hear her enter their chambers, and thought of coming out, but he didn't know what to say to her. He's had enough damage.
"Hi, hello there. You must be Hermione Granger, the head girl. I'm Dylan Crass." The boy said, his hand rose to wave at her.
Hermione's anger immediately dropped and turned into confusion. "Oh. Umm, what—"
"I was asking for some extra help for my Potions class, see we have our finals tomorrow. I know it's past the remedial time schedule but I just really, really need Draco's help on this." Dylan said. Draco only looked at her, didn't bother to join in the conversation. Dylan was a pretty slow learner, but his mouth is as fast as a Nimbus 2000. He was smart with one thing, which was on what people are about to say, and he answers them before they're even finished.
"It's past—"
"I know, past curfew, and I asked Draco if that was alright and he said he didn't mind at all. And we would study somewhere else but it is curfew and Draco said we shouldn't go to the library so we stayed here. I brought chocolate cake as a peace offering, would you like chocolate cake as a peace offering?"
"Wow." Hermione mumbled. The boy sure talked fast. He imagined Dylan to be very shy and well, dim-witted looking. But he's so chipper he could probably bounce off the walls if he wanted to.
And what did he mean Draco said they shouldn't go to the library?
"Thank you, Dylan. But you should really be—"
"I'll bring him." Draco stood and faced Dylan. "Come on, we were over ten minutes ago anyway."
"I know, and I think I'm ready for tomorrow, or maybe I'm just overconfident. Like what if my mind suddenly goes blank the moment I get the test scroll, and then I'll fail again? But I'm sure it won't, we've been studying all week and I think I've got it I mean, I've got the best potions student as my tutor, I mean where can I go wrong?" Dylan rambled as he put his books and scrolls inside of his duffel bag and walked to the door. "Thanks for helping me, Draco. These last two months have been really nice. You're a good teacher. Maybe you should be a professor? Anyway, I'll tell you all about it when I see you next time. Oh and thanks for letting me stay here. Your place sure is nice. And very clean. Not like mine. See you, Hermione!"
Dylan's voice echoed through the walls as he and Draco walked away.
Draco didn't even look at her when they stepped out.
He didn't even look back when they walked away.
That should be a good thing.
But it didn't feel like it.
When Draco walked Dylan, he kept spacing out, his mind left inside their Common Room. Good thing the kid didn't mind and kept rambling on. He really thought that taking on Dylan was going to be a problem. He honestly just took on the task because, well, he was trying to make a point to Hermione. They might have told them that the bloke was hopeless, and he wanted to prove he wasn't the type of person who gave up, so he grabbed the opportunity.
But then they had to fight.
Whenever Draco would remember it, he would flinch. His stomach would feel all woozy, and it made him grit his teeth. It was a painful night, one he wouldn't want to happen again, but if he had a chance he would do things over and over again until it was right. He just didn't know how. The only possible thing he could do was respect her wishes, for him to leave her alone.
It wasn't that he was giving up, no. He knew she felt the same way. She was simply blinded with her doubts and fears about him. She still believed what she heard, which wasn't even the entirety. He'd blame her colossal pride, but she couldn't resent her for it. He knew she was like that; it was part of what he loved about her so he let it slide. It was an agonizing two months and he still didn't get her back.
Well, he has an idea. It might not be the answer.
When he got back to their dormitories, he was expecting her to be inside her room. But as he opened the door and had the view of their common room, she was there, standing and twirling a spoon and holding a cup. He bet it was hot chocolate. She was fond of that during long nights. He just didn't expect she'd still be out here, knowing he would be back soon. She looked at him expectantly.
Oh, so we're acknowledging each other's presence now? Draco thought.
"Sorry, I'll be out of your way." He said.
"Oh, right." She set her cup down. "Just a quick question, I couldn't help but recall what Dylan said about you working with him for two months?"
He looked at her this time, after such a long time only seeing glimpses. She still looked the same. Her impossible hair tied in a bun, her robes prim and proper.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" She asked as she fidgeted.
"I haven't seen you in a while."
"Of course you have, we live in the same school, take the same classes—"
"I only see a whiff of you, because you'd immediately turn to go the other way."
Her mouth hung open then closed, and then she cast her head down. "Just answer my question, Draco." She whispered.
"Yes, I have."
"But remedial was only for a month." She took her cup and sipped.
"He needed more help, so I extended it. I told you I don't easily give up." Draco said as he grabbed his things. "But I know to stop when I'm not wanted."
"You know why I did what I had to do—" She said as she turned to face away from him.
"No, you did what you think you had to do. And I can't blame you for that. You've always been logical, Hermione." He said it so calmly, even he was shocked. He looked at her knuckles, turning white from holding on to the sink. "I just wished you listened to others for a change."
The silence that ensued was deafening and hurtful. Months of keeping it buried and putting back out there didn't make the pain any less. It made it worse.
"Do you hate me?" She said, her voice cracked.
"I could never hate you. I'd keep doing the complete opposite if you'd let me." He sighed as he walked to his room, his steps more difficult to take the further he went away from her. But he had to, this was what she wanted. When he opened his door, he looked back at her. "I'd do anything for you, so when you asked me to go away I did. That's how much I don't hate you."
He closed his door.
Hello! I don't think I've written anything post chapter so here we are. Sorry if this chapter was such a downer, if it's any consolation it sucks to write it.
I would like to announce that after this chapter we only have two chapters left. Yes my dears, this story is going to end soon. As to how, of course I wouldn't tell you. Spoilers. An infinite thanks to those who are reading it, both old and new. You are all loved by me. Your reviews are all lovely to read, I get a mild heart attack when I get mail about it.
Until the next. x
