Happy New Year everyone..hope it will be the best one yet..
Here's chapter 27 aka 'Do not mess with Coulson'
Enjoy and review..=))


Phil Coulson was happy. Lola was doing fine, work was great. Sure, there are always some world incidents to handle but it was manageable. But the biggest reason for his happiness was Audrey. He loved the fact that he didn't have to lie to her about his work, since they met on the job. He loved her smile and was mesmerized whenever he heard her play the cello. Simply, he loved her. So when he got to work the next day, he had a big smile on his face. That is until he got to his office.

He stormed out of the room and went straight to the training room.

"Barton, my office! You too Romanoff." He ordered.

"Hay Phil …" Clint started but Coulson cut him off.

"NOW!"


They got to his office and Coulson turned around to face them.

"Wow Phil, I didn't know you were such a romantic." Clint commented and Natasha closed the door, trying to hide her laughter. All of the walls were full of heart shaped pictures of Phil and Audrey kissing.

"I know it was you."

"What? Why would it be me? Come on Phil."

"Because you are the only one here childish enough to think of it!" Coulson raised his voice.

"Seriously, have you met the people around you?" Clint replied.

"You know, over the years, I've learned to expect this stupidities form you Barton, but you…" He looked at Natasha.

"It was his idea."

"Traitor." Clint shot at her. "We saw you yesterday and thought you might want a nice reminder of your lovely time."

"You two were in the Metropolitan Opera? When there were no shows or anything?"

"We saw you in the city and thought that you might be on a mission and that you need back up." Clint jabbered.

"Please stop talking." Natasha pleaded. "We were curious and she's pretty and seems very nice." She continued.

"She is." Phil replied. "We met 3 months ago in Portland. She was being stalked by a mentally unstable man who gained some abilities in a lab accident with something called the Darkforce."

"Those accidents are becoming more and more frequent." Natasha remarked.

"Tell me about it. Anyhow, I led a SHIELD team and captured him. Wait, why am I telling you all of this? I don't need to explain myself to you."

"Damn, you're good." Clint commented.

"Agent Romanoff I don't appreciate being manipulated."

"I'm not. You volunteered the information."

"Well, now I'm volunteering a punishment for the two of you."

"Come on Phil, you can't ground us. We haven't been on a mission since my operation."

"Oh, I won't ground you. That would be a bigger punishment for me. I'm going to volunteer the two of you for the annual skills seminar."

"No, no, no. Phil come on. You can't do that."

"I can and I will."

"What is the annual skills seminar?" Natasha questioned.

"I'm glad you asked, agent Romanoff. The annual skills seminar is where top SHIELD agents hold lectures and training courses for other agent's, both junior and senior. And Strike Team DELTA is perfect for the job." Phil smirked.

"For the first time I actually agree with Barton's exaggerated negation. Coulson, everyone hates me and you know what will happen if I get annoyed."

"The seminar starts Thursday at 10. I'll send you the schedule. You better prepare. Also, get all of this down!" Coulson exited the office and left Natasha and Clint stunned.

"I am so going to kill you!"

"Right now you would be doing me a favor." Clint complained and started taking the pictures of the wall.


"This is hopeless!" Clint exclaimed throughout the SHIELD common room.

"We just started 10 minutes ago." Natasha pointed out and continued to write in her notebook.

"Well it looks like 10 hours to me. Wait, what are you writing?"

"You'll see when I'm finished. Look, why don't I finish the lecture materials and you go to the training room and make a course for tomorrow." Natasha suggested.

"Good idea. Got any special requests?"

"Make sure it's really hard." Natasha smirked.


Couple of hours later Clint came back to the common room.

"Please tell me you brought food." Natasha asked as soon as she saw him.

"I got some bagels and chocolate bars." He offered.

"Give me the bars."

"You done?"

"Yeah, you can read it if you want." She handed him the notebook.

"Why is it in Cyrillic?"

"Habit I suppose."

"This is good stuff Nat."

"Thank you. It's mostly from experience. Now we just need to learn it until tomorrow morning."

"We can learn cover ID's on the fly, this should be a piece of cake. Why don't we met in your room at half past 8 and go over it one more time."

"Sounds good. I'm pretty tired anyways and have to wash my hair."

"I'll go copy this and return the notebook to you."

"Agents, I'm glad I caught you." Coulson walked over to them. "I wanted to remind you to dress accordingly for the seminar."

"Accordingly how?" Natasha asked.

"Well business like. You are presenting it to the whole of SHIELD."

"No, no, no. I'm not wearing a suit, Coulson."

"You should have thought about that before you vandalized my office." Coulson smirked and left.

"You know, I see the appeal of being a gun for hire now."

Natasha chucked. "Come on, you don't have to wear a suit. Just put on some nice pants and shirt. It's not what you wear, it's how you wear it." She padded him on the back.


Next morning Clint and Natasha meet in her room and went trough everything. The speech Natasha wrote was about 2 pages long. Basic spy stuff and a couple of tricks they both picked up along the way. Much to Clint's dismay, they followed Coulson's guidelines and dressed business like. Clint was in a sharp dark gray suit and Natasha wore minimalist dress and red heels with her hair straighten down.

The room was full, some people were even sitting on the stairs and standing by the wall.

„This is the biggest turn out we've ever had." Hill commented as she approached them.

„Of course it is. I bet Coulson blackmailed them all with desk duty if they didn't show up." Clint complained.

„Or they want to see what one of SHIELD's best agent and a former Russian assassin have to say. Anyhow, I have to introduce you. Brake a leg."

„Thanks." Natasha replied.

"Lady's and gentleman, welcome to the 13th annual skills seminar. Today's lecture will be led by probably two of our best. He's the world's greatest marksman and she's the deadliest assassin there is. Please welcome Clint Barton and Natasha Romanoff.

Natasha turned to Clint.

"Showtime."