This is going to be my standard opening from now on. There may be some interesting news added at a later date, that will come directly after this line however so that you can skip anything you're not interested in reading!

A forever thank you and credit for her ideas goes out to Litahatchee and her fic Night Fire. Go read it. It is WONDERFUL and she has permitted me to use some of her ideas in this story.

Also a forever thank you to FORD B. my beta reader. You make writing easy!

Any further notes shall be posted at the end of the fic. Enjoi!


Journal entry; obstinance

~ Characterized by inflexible persistence or an unyielding attitude; inflexibly persisted in or carried out. ~

Yeah, that's me to a tee. Whenever I've been confronted with a challenge I've never been one to give in, quit or ignore it. So...can anyone guess what a little alien created security bracelet and an alarm posed to a person who chose to live her life reverse engineering unusual things? Yeah.

I have to give it to Ratchet, he had thought this through pretty deeply, which I guess for an alien with a computer for a brain is not all that uncommon...maybe. However, curiosity wins all in the end and the curious will not be denied.

~Aurian Fae


"I know it's gotta be around here somewhere." Aurian growled. Ratchet had denied her request to go for a walk yet again and she was beyond frustrated with his overprotective behavior.

She had spent every spare moment that Ratchet was away searching for the device that would trigger the alarms connected to the bracelet around her ankle. As she continued to wander the med bay she found herself drawing closer and closer to the exit. "Maybe I should just let the alarm go off until it drives everyone so insane they have to turn it off." She mused, however a faint 'click' caught her attention as she approached the door. Turning back and stepping away she heard the sound again. Curiously she stepped back toward the door and heard the sound again. "Got'ca." She laughed evilly, repeating the process until she found where the sound originated.

Barricade had been exposed to many, many disturbing things throughout his service with the Decepticons. Things that often made him question his decision to align himself with the faction at all. Even considering all of those experiences he was pretty sure that very little compared to the sheer nerve wracking glee at which the human woman was giggling as she tore into some hapless machinery that had been tucked away on the far side of the med bay. He couldn't see her but he didn't have to.

"Keep me locked up? Think you can keep me in with simple electronics? Ohhhh no, no way!" Another peel of laughter broke from Aurian's throat as she finally found the piece she was looking for. "I'm gonna teach you a lesson you'll never forget, Ratchet. Next time you want to keep a techie locked in you won't use tech to do it!" The component fully disassembled on the inside Aurian carefully reassembled its casing so that it looked as though it had never been touched. "Now..." she glanced around the corner she had tucked herself away in for this stage of her evil plan, "to get out unnoticed."

"Human..."

"'Cade, say one word and I'll dismantle you too."

Barricade found he could not be convinced she did not mean every word she spoke at that very moment. The disturbing tone of glee had not left her voice and he decided he did not want to chance it. So, he could only muse silently to himself as he heard the soft steps of the woman retreating to the other side of the med bay and the faint 'click' as the human sized door closed behind her.

"That woman would have made an excellent Decepticon."

Aurian stormed down the hallway defiantly. She actually had no real reason to want to have left the med bay this time other then the sheer spite of it. 'Sometimes,' she told herself, 'you are so childish.' Still, she couldn't remove the smirk from her face as she thought of Ratchet searching the entire med bay for hours looking for her because he knew she had to be there somewhere. 'I wonder how long it will be before he realizes his ingenious device is nothing more then a fancy paperweight.' She found herself giggling manically.

'What have you done?' That same odd thinking popped into her head that she had had before.

Before she had thought maybe she was going crazy and while that option was not completely out of her mind she was starting to get the inkling she knew what this was. Not that she understood how it was. "Nothing." She spoke out loud but focused all her thoughts on an image of Sideswipe. Oddly enough she saw him skulking about some wooded area. When had she ever seen him there?

'I doubt that.' Came the reply.

"Where are you?" She started walking again and found her feet knew their own path.

'On patrol. Where are you?' There was the distinct feeling of knowing in the thought.

"I'm...around."

'You're not in the med bay, are you.' Amusement and concern filled her with the thought.

"What if I'm not?"

She sighed with the wave of frustration that washed over her. That was strange because she wasn't really frustrated anymore. Getting beyond the medical wing had cured her of that. 'Aurian...just don't do anything dumb, okay?'

"Because ignoring Ratchet's strict orders isn't dumb? I think I'll be fine." She laughed, "I know I'm being dumb, I just couldn't resist the challenge." She was now roaming the open area between buildings. The wind and sun felt so fantastic! She hadn't realized she wanted the exposure so much until just now.

'Well, at least you seem happy.'

"Yeah, I guess I am." She leaned against a wall, just basking in the sunlight. She was happy at that moment. It almost seemed like nothing else mattered. She was safe, warm and though she had a voice talking to her in her head she felt comforted by it. "Sideswipe?" She only half asked because she needed to make sure that it was the mech she was communicating with somehow, the other half was because she wanted to know he was still listening.

'Yeah?'

"I had a weird dream the other night. When I went to my room I fell asleep and I started having a nightmare, but then there was this light...I felt safe and I finally got some good sleep." She thought of the golden light, the words 'Who are you?' echoing through her dream state. "Was that you?"

There was no answer for a moment but she could feel that the mech was not only stunned but confused. 'No.'

"Then who was it?"

'I...' thoughts of a mech she had not yet seen filled her mind, someone she knew who was without having to be told.

"Sunny?"

'Maybe.'

"Wait, but if he could get into my dream then can't you feel him? I mean, wouldn't that mean that he's close enough to..."

'No. I can't sense him.' The words were almost bitter and Aurian felt guilty for even mentioning the missing twin.

"I'm sorry."

'Can...' there was a whirl of thoughts too fast for Aurian to even dream of interpreting, 'Can you?'

"What?"

'The same way you sense me now. Can you do it for him?'

"I don't know..."

'Try!' The thought was so fierce Aurian almost felt physically slapped. She pulled away from the feeling, blocking it out. She suddenly didn't want to talk to Sideswipe anymore.

Searching the open area of the base she continually blocked out thoughts of the silver mech though they persistently tried to seep into her forethoughts. She wanted to relax, to be at peace, not be yelled at in her own head. There was nobody to be seen so she made her way back to the small rise near the unused runway where she had previously spent so much of her time before she had been practically relocated to the med bay permanently.

'He's just worried for Sunny.' She told herself, not that that helped the hurt she felt. Why did she feel so hurt? It's not like he meant to 'yell', he was hopeful that she might be able to reach his twin when he could not... 'He's jealous.' She suddenly realized. It wasn't the eagerness, or the forcefulness of his 'thought' that had upset her. It was the fact that he was jealous that she might be able to reach his twin when he could not, or perhaps that Sunstreaker had reached out to her instead of to him. "Aft." She grumbled to herself plopping down on the ground.

"What are you doing out here?"

Aurian sighed, it was inevitable that someone would find her, she had just hoped it would have been longer before she was discovered. "Hi Will. It's good to see you too." The man came to stand in front of her. She had to look up to see him.

"No," Will backpedaled slightly, "not that I'm not happy to see you up and about but last I heard you were confined to the med bay."

"Yeah," Aurian displayed her trinket for the Major to see, proving that it was still in place, "Can't leave without permission." 'Supposedly.' She added to herself.

"Oh." Will looked surprised by the little bracelet, it was very nice looking. Something that many woman would fawn over enviously. Ratchet had explained that he had placed a device on the woman that would set off alarms anytime she left the med bay and by the demonstration of a few days prior he knew it to be true but he hadn't expected it to be such a nice looking thing. "I guess then, do you want some company?"

"Sure." Aurian smiled. She had missed conversing with Will. It seemed that since her return to the base both he and Rob had been so busy that they hadn't had the time for her. She knew not to be offended, this was their job after all and she wasn't very high up on their list of things to do. "You've been spending a lot of time at home, huh?"

"Yeah, Sarah's worried." Will settled himself next to Aurian, gazing out at the desert that surrounded them. Not a very magnificent view. "I tried to convince her to move to the base housing for the time being but she wouldn't have any of that."

"Can't say I blame her."

"Me neither." He shook his head, "So how are you?"

"Fine." She smiled brightly at the man, a sure sign that 'fine' wasn't the proper word for how she was.

"Uh huh, and how long are you allowed to be roaming about the base?"

"Oh, until Ratchet calls for me I guess." She couldn't stop the giggle that came, "I'm sure it won't be too long now." It had been a while since she'd made her escape. Surely Ratchet would discover that she had left the med bay any moment now and then the alarms would be sounded and the search would be on.

The two sat for a good length just talking. Their conversation ranged from what was going on at the base (that Aurian was permitted to know anyway) to their home lives. Aurian became all too aware of all the people that she hadn't spoken to since this whole ordeal began, like her mother. She remembered the police officer saying that a family member had reported her missing. Had it been her mother? Or one of her aunts? Their family was pretty close so her sudden absence wouldn't have gone unnoticed.

"Is there a chance I could possibly use a phone?" Aurian finally asked.

"What for?" Will hadn't caught how the direction of the conversation had been affecting Aurian.

"I want to call my mom. She's probably freaking out. I just want to tell her I'm okay."

Will found himself surprised. Why hadn't he thought of that? Of course Aurian would be missing her own family and the fact that she couldn't just go visit them whenever she wanted... "Of course."

Leading Aurian to the base's offices Will sought out a reasonably secluded area where she could have some privacy. "You're going to have to make it quick. I'm sorry but phone time is limited over public lines."

"Okay." Aurian considered the phone. What was she going to say? 'Hey, mom. Got myself mixed up with alien robots, not sure when I'll be by to visit, love you, bye?' Yeah...that would go over well. With a deep sigh she decided she would figure it out as she went and grabbed the phone. It rang several times before a rather worn voice answered on the other end.

"Hello?"

"Mom?"

"Aurian!"

"Yeah, sorry I haven't called..." Aurian felt guilty as the woman on the other end broke down in sobs of gratitude, telling her of all the fears that had haunted her over the past several days of her daughter's absence and how she thought the worst had happened. "I'm so sorry mom, I really didn't mean to worry anyone. It just all happened so fast."

"What happened?"

"Well, I can't exactly say..."

"Is it that job of yours? I've told you a thousand times it was going to lead to trouble." The older woman gasped with shock, "I saw on the news the lab was destroyed! Were you there? Is that why you've been gone? Are you alright?"

"Mom. I...yes, I was there. No, I didn't get hurt when the building was destroyed. It was kind of my fault actually, but that's the part I can't really talk about. I just wanted to call you and tell you I'm okay. I don't know when I'll be able to come see you..." Aurian found herself choked at the thought. Could she go see her mother? If the Decepticons were hunting her then if she went visiting she would be exposing her mother to them. For all she knew this phone call could be exposing her! 'Oh, Gods!' "Mom, I've got to go. I'm so sorry! I love you!" Before the woman on the other end could say anything Aurian hung up. "Will! How secure are these lines?"

"What? Why?"

"I called my mother. They could've been listening in!"

Will's demeanor instantly relaxed and he smiled assuringly for the woman, "Don't worry. That's why there's a time limit. The lines are secured, though a long conversation could allow for the systems to be hacked and exposed. You're call was not long enough for anyone to find your mother."

Aurian nearly melted with the sudden relief, "Good..." She felt so tired now. Talking to her mother had brought on a whole new wave of emotions she just wasn't ready to deal with.

"Shouldn't you..." Before Will could finish his sentence a familiarly unusual alarm began to sound.

"Heh...well, I guess Ratchet's calling." Aurian's grin crept back on her face, "If you'll excuse me." She pushed past Will, giggling the whole way.

"Where are you going?"

"Shouldn't it be obvious?" She called over her shoulder.

"If I'm not mistaken, that's the med bay alarm Ratchet had installed." Will began to follow the woman. He wasn't entirely sure if he should escort her back to the med bay or follow and see where she was going.

"Sure is."

"That was designed to go off when a certain item crossed a specific point."

"Yep."

"You're not supposed to be out here, are you?"

"Nope." Aurian laughed again. "Don't worry, I'm going back."

"Why do you push you limits?" He was actually angry. After everything Aurian had been through by every right she should be completely bed ridden for several weeks to allow proper recovery. Ratchet had found it difficult to get her to even remain in one room, let alone rest.

"Because," Aurian didn't blame Will for his anger. He was a military man, orders were to be followed not pushed or ignored. "If I didn't, I'd wither into a bumbling mess of fear." She looked at the stunned man, pure honesty exposed in everything she did, speaking in an informative tone, "I've been chased down, shot at, locked up, tagged," she waved at the bracelet around her ankle, "lectured, threatened and been the cause of so much pain and suffering I can't even begin to apologize for it all.

"I've been turned into a guinea pig and because of that I'm terrified of Ratchet, Ratchet! who's only intention is to help me. Every time I close my eyes I'm bombarded by images I'd rather never see again. I'm scared all the time.

"I can't go home, can't go see my family or friends aside from Roddi; who I might mention is being held as a prisoner no matter what anyone says, you're not fooling me or him; was the direct cause for the destruction of my work place, destroying the lively hood of over a hundred people...I've lost everything in a less traumatic way then a national disaster yet every bit as effective." She smiled again, "I've got my spite and my curiosity. I won't lose those too." Moving on before Will could have a minute to compose himself Aurian found that just having let all that out made her feel better. "I'll catch ya' later Will!" She called out, waiving dismissively.

Will, despite all his military history, all the horrible things he had seen through his war tours didn't know what to say or do. Aurian had stated so simply that she was an emotional wreck and clinging to the little bit of sanity she could see. He had known men to completely lose it for less. He decided that, for now, as long as she wasn't coming to harm and she at least remained on base he could turn a blind eye to her little defiances. If it gave her something solid to stand on, it was harmless enough. "Sorry Ratchet." He mumbled.

Aurian wandered down the hallways in no particular hurry to reach her destination. She really didn't want to receive the lecture she knew she was due but to continue to avoid Ratchet wasn't a good idea. For all his orders and demands he had nothing but her best interest in mind and she had to respect that. The alarm continued to moan it's soft warning, reminding her that once again she had let her selfishness bother those who only wanted to help her. 'Childish.' She scolded herself.

"By Primus, human." Aurian turned to see Jolt standing behind her, arms crossed and a rather disapproving look on his face looking down at her.

"Jolt, I'm going back." She pointed in the direction of the med bay, "I guess 'sorry' isn't going to cut it, huh?"

"I can honestly say I haven't seen Ratchet this wound up in vorns." His voice was clipped, stating fact not speculation, "What possessed you?"

Aurian shrugged, "Spite."

"After everything everyone has done for you and you go traipsing around like nothing happened?" The blue mech came to stand a few feet from the human woman. "You should have stayed put."

"I know."

There was no forgiveness in anything Jolt did. He plucked the small woman from the ground and lifted her up to his optic level, giving one last good glare before heading toward the med bay. "You are nothing but trouble."

Aurian could not argue, found that she didn't want to argue. Her thoughts drifted back to Sideswipe and all the pain he had suffered because of her. She decided then that she would try to reach Sunstreaker. It was the least she could do for the mech that had risked his life for her.

Ratchet was something completely different. Aurian knew he was angry, that he was near his limit with her. She continued to defy everything he told her simply because she could and knew that was more frustrating to him then having to deal with the damages Skids and Mudflap's continually caused one another from their inane scuffles. So of course when she was deposited on the examination table and faced with the angered mech she astutely refused to look at him. She was ready to take his scolding but she didn't want to have to see that anger and frustration.

"Aurian," she was disheartened by the disappointment in his voice as he began speaking. She could've handled anger. "Will contacted me. He said you've spent the afternoon with him."

She nodded, maybe not the whole afternoon but a portion of it had been spent with the man.

"He told me what you said to him." Ratchet knelt down so that Aurian could not avoid looking at him any further, "I'm not mad at you. My actions were not meant to make you feel trapped."

"I know that." She grumbled. Damn him for being understanding. If he was angry with her she could be angry with him and feel that her actions were justified. His understanding made her feel even more childish then she already knew herself to be.

"It would seem, that though you say you know, you do not feel the same. I will remove the device to show you that I mean what I say."

"No." Aurian oddly felt a little anxiety over the idea of the silver band being removed. She had been angry at its purpose but the item its self was nice to look at...and it was created out of concern for her and somehow that made it precious. "I'd like to keep it."

Jolt observed the interaction from a distance with some form of disbelief. The human had acted irresponsibly, which was something that would have normally sent Ratchet off the deep end, yet here he was talking softly with her, seemingly trying to encourage her. He had heard what the humans were capable of and understood that they were good allies to have but he truthfully didn't see what caused the others to become so friendly with them. They were small, fragile and annoying. This one in particular had been nothing but trouble since his arrival and yet all of the other mechs had lept into action to rescue her from a situation she had put herself into. True, Sideswipe had assisted in the event and he had assumed that that was why everyone else was getting involved but now? Optimus had told him and the twins that had arrived with him that Aurian was a special case and was to be considered as such, he just didn't understand why.

All of the other humans on the base were either military; warriors capable of handling themselves in battle, medical personal; there for obvious reasons, or government; here to maintain levels of alliance between the two species. Yet this human, Aurian, was none of those. She had no purpose on the base at all.

"Will you stay here then?" Ratchet stood, bringing Jolt back to the conversation going on between the two.

"Can I at least leave for food?"

The medic considered the proposition, before all of this he would have said no. He preferred to monitor her nourishment intake to assure she was eating well; a sign of recovery but taking into account that the woman would turn down the foods he brought her nearly half of the time anyway... "As long as you promise to eat properly, take it easy and get plenty of rest I suppose it couldn't hurt."

"Deal." Aurian was elated by the mere idea of having some semblance of freedom...her gaze drifted over to Barricade.


Journal entry continued; negotiations

Barricade would not speak for himself, somebody had to. But what was I going to say in his favor? He had tried to kill me, participated in the battle for the Allspark...the youth sectors...

I had my work cut out for me. I decided I would put together a formal proposition and go to Optimus himself with it. How was I going to get Barricade to concede though? Dang, this was going to take time.

~Aurian Fae