Concentrate.
Stay conscious.
Concentrate.
Breathe.
Are you listening?
Breathe.
Now you know what to do.
No.
Concentrate. What is your task?
You have nothing to do with her.
What is your task?
No! She was always mine.
Beware of her because she is the one with her eyes wide open.
Concentrate.
What is your task?
OOO
Butch ran with hand through his messed up hair and quietly swore at the sight before him.
"You know you shouldn´t drink now."
On the other side of the kitchen V glanced back at him through his shoulder. "Pissed off because you weren´t invited to the party, cop?"
He could sense his half smile across the room and it made him feel like more swearing forming in his mouth. There was that familiar sound of the bottle being moved accompanying Butch´s thoughts of what the fuck could be a reason that V would risk a possible sabotage to his treatment. He was still on the pills. So one drink? Ok with a closed eyes. But four? It wasn´t like the brother couldn´t live without it for a…
"Does it work?" Butch spilled the question and almost felt V´s smile fading even when he couldn´t see it.
"What?"
"The pills Mannelo gave you."
He put the glass to his mouth and then down back on the table without taking a sip. Butch´s hand covered his after he moved behind V´s back. "They did."
It wasn´t that simple answer which made Butch felt miserable. It was the fact that V was so good at hiding that it was so simple to him to pretend everything was fine. He put his trust into Butch and cop wasn´t stupid. He knew that the only reason, why he wasn´t taking some shit now was only because of him. So about the matter of fact, he was in pain because of him.
For some reason it was tearing Butch´s heart right in his chest.
"Hey, don´t do that."
Butch realized with a surprise that V was no longer showing him his back.
"Don´t blame yourself. It´s my fucking head, true? I don´t know what´s wrong or how to fix it. So how can you?"
He didn´t dared to open his mouth immediately scared of pissing Vishous off at the same time.
"How bad and don´t lie to me."
V smirked and after a brief scanning it looked honest. "A lot of better than before, doctor. And I mean it."
It didn´t return the wind to the sails, but at least convinced Butch that all the crazy stuns he made Vishous do – like their small bull fight or allowing himself being checked by a person he would like to choke, had some meaning. If nothing else, it was a good try. Well, actually the best when Butch considered he wasn´t any doctor or psychologist or supernaturally-fucking-educated.
He was caught up by a surprise, when he felt V´s hand pulling him closer. He let his body crashed against brother´s strong chest feeling like a bitch for seeking a comfort, when he should be the one giving it.
"If nothing works anymore, I´ll go to Scribe Virgin."
Vishous laughed bitterly to cop´s hair. "She will fry you."
"I know. Don´t mind." Hell, he felt completely lost in the warmth and then even more as V´s arms tightened around him. He´d never felt so invincible like when he heard him growl: "only through my dead body." Yeah, he definitely felt like he could breathe fire now!
"I ´m still surprised she didn´t do anything about this." He let Vishous wandering through his own words without a reply.
"Wrath called," then he suddenly stated and left Butch a place to move and look at him. "We have shifts like before."
"Is he giving up?" He didn´t blink afraid of knowledge whose small bodies he would see in that tiny second.
V shook his head. "No, he´s not. We just need some time to come up with a new plan. Besides the kids need someone to kick their asses in training. I´m teaching tomorrow." He didn´t hear any anger although it was pretty clear why was V Wrath´s first choice off the streets. "You with me."
"Did Wrath say this or you?"
"First me, he agreed."
Why that didn´t surprise him? "But right now we have still a lot of time, right?"
V narrowed his eyes with a suspicion. "Yes, why?"
Butch´s mouth went into a giant smile in the exact moment, when he saw V understood. For a few second he just enjoyed those beautiful eyes changing to something animal-related, wild and those hands resting on cop´s body getting heavier. It was like a spell slowing down a time. Making things twice as sensitive and twice as needful.
Butch fell down on his knees hungry after that mouth, which slightly opened in the same moment releasing a shuddering breath. He wanted to feel V´s hands on his neck and in his hair, not having them gripping the edge of the table behind.
"You were a very good patient today."
"Fuck cop, what do you want to do?"
He put his hands on V´s hips steadying him on place.
"Another form of therapy, perhaps. You should consider yourself lucky. I kneel only before two people. The first one is Jesus, my lord and savior." Butch grinned from the ground. "Then you."
OOO
There was a smell of fire in the air and its consuming destruction. A victim and a murderer standing against each other. In that one silent hallway playing both roles – a butcher and a pig, a princess and a huntsman.
Bloodletter was drown into woman´s cold eyes and in the same moment confident that what he saw there was a knowledge. He felt like shivering under her hateful stare - like she was breaking through all his walls and seeing everything, his very soul, playing with it and finally considering if she should continue in that torture or throw it to the wild dogs.
He was sure that the woman had to smell that stinking odor. Burning. Burning. It was his flash and the fear of his sudden death. Then he thought he saw her speaking, her mouth was moving and it was: "kill him!"
But a moment passed and there was no one to catch his arms and shove a dagger to his heart.
"It´s him," she said, the death sentence misspelled, sending a boat of relief to the stormy water.
"It´s him, a new warrior?"
Bloodletter didn´t release his breath. Suddenly he saw the other figure certain that it couldn´t be there with him the whole time.
"Yes, he is. Lethre, please, meet my shellan Payne, V´s sister." There was a quick laugh and more sarcastic words, which wasn´t making a good sense to him. "Now you probably know, why he likes me so much."
He should have responded somehow. There was a few second in which that would be appropriate and expected, but he missed them. He couldn´t find his voice, he couldn´t hear it through the screaming in his head.
It wasn´t his task. It wasn´t his task.
How hard he tried to reach into his memories and find a face and whispered words before his body had turned to ashes, but it was all gone and impossible to connect.
"You okey?"
He looked away. "Yes." No. It was my daughter. She killed me. Why did it make him feel sick?
Bloodletter made himself talk, or maybe he just imagined it. Because suddenly he was running away and there was someone calling after him, but he didn´t stop. He couldn´t stop.
That night he dreamt about hell and fire, about hollow faces smiling at him from darkness and one face, which wasn´t like any other. It wasn´t laughing at him, it wasn´t biting, it wasn´t twisted and ugly. It was the face of the person who soothed his mind with her deep blue eyes. He´d seen it before. Yes. And from that night he saw it every time he closed his eyes for the rest of his damned life.
