Chapter 29

Neal savoured the last few bites of the pork and Chinese broccoli Sara had brought over from the Full Moon, their local Thai restaurant, and he let out a satisfied sigh.

'Thanks for that' he said as he looked over at his wife.

She was still working on hers.

'You saved me from dried out sole and powdered mashed potatoes' he added as he pointed to the hospital menu nearby.

'Anything for you. What time did Dr. Miller say she'd be by?' she asked.

'It's never the same; depends on her surgery schedule' Neal replied.

He grabbed for his list of questions on the bedside table. Although Sara had been watching him work on the list for the better part of a week, she had refrained from being too nosy. She reached over and grabbed a piece of paper from her purse, taking it out with a flourish.

'I'll show you mine if you show me yours' she said with a titter.

'All right, let's compare notes' he agreed as he ran his finger down the long list. 'You first.'

'Toilet' she started.

'Well, now that I've finally gotten rid of the catheter, we don't need to worry about that quite as much. I've been practicing getting into the chair, I can almost get to the bathroom by myself' Neal said rather proudly.

'Those parallel bars have been installed in the downstairs bathroom so you can hold on to them while you do your thing' Sara added.

'Bathing' Neal countered.

'Well, you'll need some help...' she acknowledged.

Neal just ignored her and returned to his list, lost in thought.

'Work' Sara said.

'I want to go back as soon as possible...' Neal began, his voice hopeful.

'Let's see what Dr. Miller says, okay?' she said as she patted his hand.

'The car...' he added.

There was so much to everyday life that was a mystery now that he had to temporarily navigate it in a wheelchair. Sara looked over at her husband; she had no answer to his question for the time being. She hesitated for a moment then pointed to an item on her list.

'Sex…' she said, finally.

Neal looked at her, his eyes wide.

'I didn't even have that on my list' he admitted.

'And usually, it's at the top of your list' Sara countered, hoping to make him laugh.

What she got instead was a faraway look in Neal's eyes as he obviously pondered the issue. He was having trouble controlling his flow of urine – how could he hope to have sex with his wife in any meaningful way. He seemed to push away the idea as he moved on to the next item on his list.

'Follow up appointments, pain control, prognosis...' he said, his voice trailing. 'The list goes on and on and on.'

Sara put down the piece of paper she'd been holding and sat on the edge of the bed. She could see Neal was feeling overwhelmed; maybe this hadn't been such a good idea after all. She took Neal's face in her hands, forcing his eyes to meet hers.

'Honey, we can do this. Let's take it one day at a time, okay?' she said as she stared lovingly into his baby blues.

He kept his eyes focussed on hers, seeing the love and compassion there and hating the thought of her having to act as his caregiver in any way. She leaned in and gave him a warm, lingering kiss – the first meaningful kiss she'd given him since she'd left for the airport that day, ages ago. He felt an unfamiliar stirring, not the usual telltale sign of his body responding to hers but still, a strangely familiar sensation all the same. He wondered if he was having what he thought he was having and his curiosity got the better of him as he let his hand glide down his body to see for himself, feeling the swelling under his hand and smiling in response.

'Well, maybe, sex...' he said as he returned the kiss.

'That's two for two' they heard from the doorway as they pulled apart to find Dr. Miller standing there.

'If I had any doubt you were ready to leave the hospital, it's all but dissipated now' she joked.

She put down the clipboard and sat in the chair by the bed. 'You've been very patient with all your questions and it's time I give you the best answers I can.'

Neal took a deep breath before plunging ahead with the multitude of questions which had been running around his brain for the past week.

'Hum, toilet' he said.

'How are you doing without the catheter? Have you been able to anticipate when you need to urinate?'

'Well, I...' Neal hesitated. 'I had an accident at the end of physio today' he admitted, looking over to see Sara's reaction. She was cool and collected.

'That happens and it'll probably happen again. The sensation isn't quite like before, is it?' Dr. Miller asked.

Neal shook his head.

'So you have to listen carefully to your body and go the bathroom regularly whether you feel the urge or not just so things don't get out of control. As far as bowel movements, are you fairly regular?' she asked.

Neal nodded. 'Yeah, mornings usually' he said.

'Well, try to anticipate and give yourself lots of time. You know, Neal, there's nothing wrong with wearing a liner if you're worried about accidents' she offered as he cringed in response.

'Do I need to keep taking the pain medication?' he asked moving on to a slightly more comfortable subject.

'You'll definitely feel it if you stop now; your body is still healing and you need the relief if you want to be able to function' she answered.

'What about home support?' Sara asked.

'Clive can see you at home and he'll show you exercises you can help Neal with' she responded, looking at Sara.

She turned to Neal before continuing. 'I can also get you some support for bathing and other personal care if you'd like.'

'No' Sara responded firmly. 'I can do that.'

Neal looked over at his wife – although he hated the thought of her acting as his caregiver, he was thankful she would be there to help him nonetheless. He reminded himself that there were worse things in life than having a gorgeous redhead bathe him and care for him.

'What about sex?' Neal asked. Ever since Sara had given him that spectacular kiss, the notion had been kicking around his brain... and a little lower as well.

'Well, there's no counter indication for it but...' Dr. Miller hesitated, '...you don't want to put any undue pressure on yourself to 'perform'. You might need help to achieve an erection or to maintain one so don't be surprised if your body doesn't do what it usually does. The pressure is on your lumbar vertebrae and it's blocking the usual messages from your brain so some of the stuff that usually turns you on – an image, a smell, a voice – might not be enough to get you going, but with a little direct physical stimulation, you can certainly get an erection. It just might not last as long as you're used to. Just… don't be afraid to experiment. I have a feeling you two have a long history together, so just be patient and enjoy each other's company without putting any pressure on yourselves for conventional intercourse at all costs' she concluded.

Neal let out a sigh of relief; depending on how long his situation lasted, he hated to think he would have to forego sexual intimacy with Sara.

'What about check-ups?' he asked, moving on.

WCWCWC

Cameron came down the stairs carrying another pile of Neal's clothes and set about putting them away in one of the many plastic containers Sara had brought in for this very purpose.

'Do you think that's enough stuff?' he asked Hope as she stood nearby doing the same.

'We can always run up and get him whatever he wants' she responded. 'I just want him to have some clothes nearby if he wants to change.'

'You know your dad, he'll probably want to come to the gallery first thing tomorrow' Cameron observed.

'Ah, and you know my mom' she countered. 'He'll have to get by her first.'

'Well, at least the place is looking clean and orderly' he answered. 'It is a little empty though.'

'It'll take time but I know Dad. He'd rather have a couple dozen quality pieces than six dozen mediocre things. Don't worry, we'll build up our stock again' Hope said with an encouraging smile. 'So, what time are we meeting Janie Stuart?'

'Seven' he said, glancing at his watch. 'We'd better get going; she said she was bringing five paintings with her to the gallery.'

'That'll be great. I know Dad really loved her stuff. Does she do consignment?'

'Yeah, she does' said Cameron.

He stopped what he was doing and grabbed Hope by the waist, pulling her in to him. Hope looked up into his eyes. 'Oh, Cam, I'm so relieved Dad's coming home!'

He started nibbling on her ear, moaning.

'Cam. Cam! Come on, we gotta go' she said, pulling away.

He groaned and followed her out the door.

WCWCWC

Twenty-five minutes after she'd arrived, Dr. Miller had managed to answer, to the best of her ability, most of the questions on both Neal and Sara's lists. She'd been very generous with her time and cautiously optimistic, reminding Neal that she was looking forward to seeing him at his first check-up the following Tuesday. They were to call his case coordinator if anything of concern came up in the meantime. She wished them both well and left the Caffreys alone, off to continue with her rounds.

'So… home' Sara said with a sigh.

'Yeah, home' Neal said just as wistfully.

As eager as he was to get on with the next phase of his new life, he knew it would be fraught with uncertainty and new challenges.

WCWCWC

'What do you think, honey? Stuffed pork or Cornish hens?' Elizabeth asked as she pored over a recipe book at the kitchen island.

'Whatever you make, Neal will love it El' Peter replied from the nearby living room.

Elizabeth kept poking around. 'It's his first night out of hospital; I want to make it special.'

'Honey, Neal loves your cooking – no matter what it is' Peter tried again.

'Oh my God!' she shouted.

'What?' Peter answered, startled.

'The steps!' she exclaimed. 'How are we going to get Neal up the steps.'

Peter got to his feet and stood across from her with a confident grin.

'We got it covered' he said. 'Mozzie and I have it all worked out. We'll bring him in from the alley and in through the back door. I already talked to the neighbours about letting us cut through their back yard' Peter said triumphantly.

'Mr. Morris agreed to let you cut through his back yard?' Elizabeth asked, surprised.

The curmudgeonly neighbour had been a thorn in their side for as many years as they'd lived in their house but even he had a heart, it seemed.

'You forget that Mrs. Morris was in a wheelchair for seven years before she died. I just appealed to his compassionate side...' he said as he made his way to where around the island to where El stood.

He snaked his arms around her waist, smiling a satisfied smile at his ability to negotiate a truce with the horrible man after all these years.

'... and he was in the army. I just insinuated that... Neal was a ... a war hero' he admitted as El turned in his arms and gave him a good natured slap on the arm.

'Why Peter Burke, you lying, conniving son of...' she began before a smile broke out on her face. 'Good job, honey!'