Mirage

A/N: I can't even remember the last time I updated but oh well, here I am again. I tried my best to make this chapter worth the read, to compensate for the long overdue and of course as thanks to all the readers who still support me and this story (despite me not being able to update more often). Massive thanks to you all. PS. I took a 3-month leap from the events of Chapter 28.

Summary: Humanity's strongest soldier had secrets of his own. So when the woman he thought he loved died, he turns on another for pure companionship and comfort. But a night of mistake has its consequences. Levihan.


CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE: HOPES


The morning was nothing but peaceful – from the looks of it – with the birds perched on the trees, singing to their lungs and the sun glistening perfectly outside, with some of the beams shining through the glass window; the swaying of the leaves as the wind blew its gentle breeze, and the little sounds that the twins made as they responded to the little coos of their mother.

Hange smiled at her sons, joy filling her chest just by watching the twins giggle and mewl as she played peek-a-boo and made funny faces just to amuse them. They were sitting in the high chairs that Levi personally crafted a few days earlier, and they responded in kind to her by tapping their little hands against their table.

With the twins already six months old, Hange felt a huge sense of accomplishment wash inside her. The sleepless nights had come and gone, she had finally adjusted to being a mother and she and her husband have now grown accustomed to the family life. Although, she wouldn't deny that she barely made it for those six months were totally hell, now that she'd somehow relived some memories from them, but well, everything was still worth it.

She had her husband to thank for this mentality, actually. She wouldn't have made it through this if it weren't for him, because he gives her strength, assurance, and love. Hange knows those six months are just a preamble to whatever shenanigan might still come, but at least she had Levi by her side.

She smiled sheepishly to herself, before glancing over at her husband, who was sitting before the table and was busy deciding what to feed the twins for their breakfast. It was their first solid food, after all, and he'd pressed that they needed to be a little meticulous on what to give them, contemplate on what they might like and favour, and also consider what's best and nutritious for them.

Hange trotted away from the twins and walked her way to Levi. She had noted the slight crease on his forehead when she neared him, and so she wrapped her arms around his neck, dropping a light kiss on his cheek before resting her chin on his shoulder. "Have you made any progress yet?" she asked, eyeing the vegetables and fruits laid out before him on the table.

Levi clicked his tongue. He'd been sitting there more than half an hour now and still he hasn't decided on what to feed his children. He had thrown occasional side glances at his wife to ask for her opinion, but she was so busy playing with the twins that he just decided to just take matters into his own hands. "Maybe if you'd help me think this through we can finally, finally decide on what to give them," he sighed.

She gritted her teeth. He seemed so distraught about the whole thing and she found that a little cute, even for him. "You're the baby expert here, remember? And I'm not their mother, you are, I'm just the one who lactates,"

Hange started to laugh, but stopped when she felt him biting her arm, his teeth digging into her skin. She immediately pulled away, rolled her sleeve up to where she felt the sting, and eyed the bite mark on her skin. "I was just kidding! Fuck, it hurts a little,"

"Serves you right," he smirked at her. "You're the scientist here, you're supposed to be the one to have a more superior knowledge regarding this thing,"

"Excuse me, dear husband, but I study Titans, not babies,"

Levi chose not to remark on that. Any talk about the Titans inside their home somehow made him uncomfortable and Hange had long ago decided to keep that in mind, but she slipped this time.

She bit her lip. When he got himself busy with his inspection again, Hange moved close, this time to take a look at the vegetables and fruits he'd brought. "Maybe we could just give them mashed potatoes or squash and call it a day," she grabbed the potato and tossed it at her husband, who instinctively caught it without even throwing her a glance.

Levi looked up and stared at his wife for a while and after a full minute he nodded and eyed the potato with a hint of amusement in his eyes. He rose and got unto the task. He started by peeling, chopping, then tossed the potatoes into a pot to boil. The whole process – from the boiling to the seasoning and final touches – took Levi only a matter of thirty minutes.

Hange kept an eye on him the whole time, watching his movements, while alternately glancing at the twins. Ciel was clutching his favorite rattle, the one Erwin gave from before they were even born, and Theo was suckling on his knuckles. She glanced back at Levi and saw that he already had a small bowl of mashed potatoes in his hands.

Placing a bib around the boys' necks, Hange and Levi both pulled a chair to sit opposite their twins. Levi started scooping up the first spoon full, and brought it close to Theo's mouth. His grey irises fluttered at his father, then to his mother, and back to his father again, and then opened his little mouth.

Theo squinted once he tasted the food, but continuously munched at it.

"Well that was easy," Hange muttered under her breath. She grabbed the spoon from Levi's hands. "Let me try," She started scooping from the bowl, and brought the spoon close to their firstborn. "Come on, Ciel, open your mouth, sweetling," Hange cooed in that ridiculous but sing-song voice.

Levi nearly choked on his own laughter as his son adamantly closed his mouth, a thin line replacing his soft baby lips. "Easy, huh? I'm afraid your son's stubborn, Hange, it makes me wonder where he got it from," He mocked.

Hange glowered at her husband, ignoring his bleak attempt at mocking her apparent dominant attitude, then tried again. "Here comes the bird, Ciel!" she exclaimed, her eyes looking hopeful. When Ciel seemingly took interest in her little ploy, Hange's heart rejoiced at her impending victory.

But again, Ciel ignored his mother, grey eyes flickering back to the toy he had in his little hands. Hange sighed, and dropped her tone to a sweeter, almost whisper-like voice. "Be a good boy for Mommy and eat this mashed potato please, Ciel?"

As if to also mock his mother like his father did, Ciel beamed up at her, but instead started tinkering with his rattle again.

Hange held her hands up, completely giving up. She frowned, Levi grinned so hard his jaws almost hurt. "Give me that," he snatched the spoon from his wife, who looked so defeated and crushed at the moment.

"Maybe he's not hungry, he must have had his fill earlier when I breastfed them," she thought of other excuses, but this one seemed to be the most obvious one.

Levi raised his brows at his wife, then leaned forward to his firstborn. He scooped from the bowl, and brought the spoon close to Ciel's mouth. Ciel once again stared at the food, blinked twice, and then gladly welcomed the mashed potato, much to Levi's satisfaction.

Hange's brown eyes widened. "Okay, seriously? That's so unfair!" she complained and groaned as she watched Levi shove another scoop into Theo's mouth, which the child munched on so easily.

"Life was designed that way, my dear wife," he huffed out a chuckle. He looked over at her face and found a little glow in those impossibly beautiful brown eyes of hers.

"I suppose so," Hange returned the stare. "Given that it appears they like you way better than me,"

This time, Hange was actually distraught, but only a little. She still found it largely amusing that the twins adore and favour their father so much over her. Although, it should surprise her no more, given that Levi had been nothing but a hands on father to both of them.

"Don't say that, I know they adore their mother just as much as they adore their father," he said, gritting his teeth. He didn't actually intend to, but his voice came out sounding a bit smug.

"They're both so fond of you, you know. I can barely keep them from bawling and crying without you there to soothe and calm them," Hange stated matter-of-factly.

"Do you find that upsetting, Hange?" Levi asked, his tone dropping low. The bowl he had on his hands is already almost emptied as the boys gladly accepted each spoonful of mashed potato that he tried to feed them.

"What? No! I love that they both are so fond of you and are obviously growing up to be Daddy's boys. I want them to grow up close to your heart, Levi, just as you are close to mine," Hange looked down to her lap, a bit embarrassed to be saying such things to him. Truly, being a mother had softened her a great deal, as she's now able to express her thoughts fully, especially to her husband, without sounding sarcastic. "Nothing would please me more than seeing my kids, who look just like you, be so completely drawn to their father,"

Levi felt his chest tighten at her words, but he chose not to show it. He tilted his head to his side, but an unconscious little smile that had somehow found itself lifting his cheeks betrayed him.

He bit his lip, then turned upon his wife once more. "It's a bit too early to speculate that they'd grow up to be Daddy's boys. I plan to be a loving father to both of them, but that doesn't mean I won't be much of a disciplinarian if either one of them gets into trouble," Levi saw her smile. "I wouldn't be the person who'd comfort them after they had their knees scraped, or if they wound themselves because they fell from a tree,"

Even as he was speaking, her mind drifted into thoughts of the twins running wild in the Headquarters' backyard, and climbing up the trees in her hometown like she did when she was younger. She imagined them being curious about little insects and animals, and herself having to explain to them the things she knew. Hange revelled, and she found her smile growing wider.

"And I know for certain that in times like those, there'd only be one person they'd want to run to, and it would be their mother," he breathed. "It would be you, Hange. I… I never could wish for any other woman to be the mother of my kids, now that I think about it. I'm just glad it's you,"

With that, Levi somehow avoided her gaze, which was undoubtedly now heated. He turned his attention to the twins and began feeding them again.

Hange didn't reply, not really knowing what to say. All she is knows is that she's thankful God had deemed fit to give her two beautiful sons and a husband and friend she knew she could always depend on. She reached out for his hand and squeezed it tightly before getting up and leaving Levi to finish feeding the kids, as she did have their laundry waiting for her, anyway.

She left without saying a word, her thoughts still on the very picture Levi had painted in her head.


When Hange left, all Levi could ever think of was how boldly he had spoken his thoughts to her, even after he declared his love, however simply and bluntly. With each passing day, he found himself becoming more and more outspoken when it comes to his feelings for Hange. He wasn't even sure where the words came from, but when he started uttering them to his wife, he found that he could not stop himself. He was even encouraged by the way her beautiful brown eyes glowed at his every word.

He loved her too damn much, he knows that by now. All the months since the twins' coming would be testament to that. All the things he did to make her happy, all the words he had uttered to assure her that she now had all of him. The 'I love you's' won't ever be enough.

There's one thing that is nagging him now, though. Something that didn't quite bother him a few months ago, but now it does. Everytime he thinks about it, he couldn't get the fear flushed out from his chest.

Exactly a month from now, Hange would be resuming her post as a soldier.

She'd be with the Survey Corps in the next mission, and it frightens him. He had told her he wouldn't get in her way if she ever chose to go back to being a soldier even after having the kids, but now that the day is almost upon them, he's no longer sure he still wants her to go back.

He vividly recounted a conversation they had regarding this a few months back.

"Hange, I know you know what's best for you. I trust you. If this is what you want, to continue fighting and risking your life, I wouldn't stop you. This is what you signed up for, after all."

"Besides… I don't want to be one of those helpless damsels just waiting for my husband to get back after every mission, I want to be out there to watch your ass." she chuckled.

"Valid explanation," Levi pointed.

"And I'm not afraid to die… We were always meant to die, right?"

He had given her his word, and Levi knew she's desperate to go back. But he had long contemplated the possible consequences it would do them both. What if one of them dies? What if he dies? He was the strongest amongst them all, but being a good fighter doesn't make him invincible. Although some believed he is, the truth is that he's always also susceptible to becoming Titan food. And what if she dies? He wouldn't be able to bear that, and he would not be able to continue knowing that her smile would be lost to him forever.

And the boys.

What if both of them died in the battlefield? What will happen to their kids?

He didn't want to think about it, but hell, he couldn't just push the thoughts away. And all those questions… He just couldn't ignore them.

But he knew he had no other choice.

Hange would be returning to the Corps, whether he wanted it or not.

With his resolve cracking, Levi turned his attention to his two sources of hope – his twins. They had long since finished their mashed potato and were happily playing with whatever toy they had on each of their tables. Levi set down the bowl on the sink, then returned back to the twins and sat opposite them.

Before he started, he breathed deeply. "I might be insane to be telling you this…" he began. Levi noted that both boys now are gazing up at him, silvery grey eyes twinkling. "But I do love you both with all my life, and I would do everything in my power to protect both of you and your mother.

"I would want to see both of you grow up to become matured, young men. I would want to teach you how to climb trees, ride horses, and when the time comes, how to hold a blade and use a gear. I would want both of you to have the kind of childhood I was unfortunate to have not had. I want to become a good father my own never was.

"But in the world that we live in, brats, waking up everyday could be as frightening as it is going outside the walls, because we never know if we might be living our last, if the walls that protect us would be breached. Even I, the strongest man alive, could die. And if that ever happens, I want you to protect your mother."

Levi's voice dropped into a whisper as he said the last sentence. With every word he said, though, he noticed that the twins looked at him with the same grey eyes as if they could understand what he was saying. He ran his hands over Ciel's head, pushing back his coal black hair. He then touched Theo's cheek after.

"Your mother is the weirdest woman I've ever met, but I fell in love with her. I fell for her long before I realized I did. And when we had you, I loved her even more. It occurred to me that everytime I thought I couldn't love her any deeper, I somehow find that I could.

"I couldn't stop her from going back to her duty, I know. But she's a strong woman. She's feisty and strong, made to defend her cause. I hope that when you grow up, you'd somehow see that. Your mother is a remarkable woman and I want you to be proud of her. As for myself, I cannot promise to be as affectionate to both of you when you grow up, but know that I'd always love you. I have loved you eversince I felt you both moving in your mother's stomach, and I would continue to do so until my last dying breath."

With that, Levi ended, feeling his chest loosen up somehow. He saw a small yawn escape from Ciel's mouth, and he chuckled. He rose to pick the two of them up, one in each arm, Ciel on his right and Theo on his left, and decided to take them to their room where he can put them to sleep peacefully.

Levi went on his way, and silently head for the twins' room. Had he not been too distracted by Theo lapping on his shoulder through his shirt, he would have seen it. He would have noticed the shadow that crossed the dining room as he left.

With clothes dangling on her arms, Hange emerged from the slightly ajar back door, a knowing smile evident on her face.