AN: Happy birthday to Emma. There's a little shout-out to you in this chapter. :)

Happy Mother's Day to all of the Mama Bears out there. And if I may steal a line from Sandra Bullock's Oscar acceptance speech, "to the moms that take care of the babies no matter where they come from." This chapter is for all of you.

Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight. The chapter title comes from Jack Johnson's "Better Together." It was suggested by my friend, Laura.


Chapter 29

Our Dreams Are Made Out of Real Things


BPOV

Riley was sitting in the middle of the largest sandbox in the park. There were a couple of children playing along side of him, and I watched with contentment as the trio shared buckets and shovels while they painstakingly developed their castles in the sand. They worked diligently….cooperatively….each person shaping his dirt in precise detail so that the three formations would join and create a masterpiece.

"The best thing about the sandbox…" Riley's friend said, "…..is that we aren't on the beach, so the ocean waves won't ruin it."

I glanced up at the darkening sky. The clouds were beginning to roll in. I looked back down at the sand box and noticed Riley looking up at the clouds, as well.

"It's going to rain," Riley replied matter-of-factly, and pride swelled in my heart. My little boy was so smart.

My little boy.

How would he react to the news?

Slowly, my hand ghosted along my stomach. Of course, there was nothing to feel. No protruding tummy just yet.

But that didn't keep me from gingerly running my fingers along my skin.

I didn't need physical, tangible proof.

I can feel her in my heart. I can feel him in veins.

Boy or girl – it doesn't matter at all.

Will Edward have a preference? Will Riley?

And how to tell them?

I wasn't nervous about telling Edward that we were pregnant. It was easy to predict his reaction. Riley was a bit trickier. Would he feel threatened? He's had Edward all to himself for so long. Will he be willing to share his father? Will he be willing to share me?

In a moment of fear, I'd dialed Dr. Jane's number. She had encouraged me to include Riley as much as possible with every aspect of including a new baby into our routine. She suggested that he help decorate the nursery, choose books for the baby's library, and pick the stuffed animals…

I thanked her, and then I felt guilty.

Dr. Jane was the first person I'd told that I was pregnant.

But I knew Edward would forgive me. This was important, and I needed to know how to proceed. Also, I had an idea, and I wanted the therapist's approval before involving Riley in my plans.

To my immense relief and happiness, she had approved.

A soft echo of thunder rumbled in the distance, prompting the other parents to grab their children's rain gear and pull them out of the sand box. Riley said goodbye to his new friends, and my heart broke a little when his beautiful face fell as he examined their unfinished sand castle.

"It's not even raining yet," Riley grumbled as he filled his bucket with dirt. After a few moments he carefully tipped it over and pulled it away, and a perfect castle tower emerged.

"Let me help," I offered as I slowly climbed into the sand pile. Riley's face brightened as he handed me a bucket. I dutifully shoveled dirt into the blue pail.

"It needs a tower on this side," he explained thoughtfully.

"And which side is that?" I prompted.

Riley grinned. We'd been working on this for a few days.

"The left side."

"Good job," I smiled. We quietly went back to work. The thunder was still rumbling in the distance, so we worked quickly. It took us another half hour, but finally, the towers were formed and our sand castle was complete. We smiled at each other and Riley scampered into my lap as we sat back, admiring our handiwork.

"Best sand castle ever," I whispered enthusiastically against his ear.

"Best mom ever," Riley murmured softly, and tears sprang in my eyes as I cuddled him close to my chest. It was the first time he'd actually said the words. I'd filled the role of his mother for so long, but to actually hear him say the words…

My heart just wasn't big enough to hold all of this happiness.

"I have a secret to tell you," I whispered, and I watched his face light up with excitement. If there was one thing that thrilled him, it was keeping a secret.

"A secret from who?"

"Well, from everyone right now," I replied thoughtfully. "But we should probably tell Daddy tonight."

"Is it a good one?"

"I think it's a great one," I ventured carefully. "But I wanted to tell you, and then you could help me tell Daddy."

"Okay," Riley agreed. I took a deep breath and turned him around in my lap so that he could face me. His tiny hands ghosted along my teary cheek.

"Are you crying again?"

It bothered me that he'd noticed that I'd been crying so much lately. I'd just been so emotional, and I'd be unable to hide it.

"Because I'm happy," I told him.

"You're must be really happy. You've been crying a lot."

I am happy. Deliriously happy.

"That's part of the secret," I told him. "There's a reason I'm so happy."

Riley stared at me expectantly.

I took another deep breath as I gazed down into his father's beautiful eyes.

"I'm happy because of the wedding…and the house….and because you want to call me mommy."

"Mommy," Riley whispered softly….hesitantly….as if he was really trying out the word for the first time. As if he was finally letting himself believe it.

"Can I call you that?" He asked gently.

My heart constricted in my chest. "Yes, baby."

"I'm not a baby," Riley scrunched his nose. "Babies are little and need a bottle…."

There's your opening, Bella Swan.

"You're right," I agreed. "You're not a baby. You're such a big boy. But….what do you think about babies? Do you think you'd like a baby brother or sister?"

He grew thoughtful. "I don't know. Emma has a little sister…."

"Who's Emma?"

"She's in my class," Riley explained. "Emma's mom picks her up, and she always brings the baby. She cries a lot."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Sometimes they do cry. But when they're little, they just mostly sleep all the time."

He remained quiet as he contemplated this new information, and I began to grow nervous. Was I doing this right?

"Are we getting a baby?" Riley finally asked. The question startled me. How had he made that connection?

"Would that be okay?"

"I think it would be okay," he replied thoughtfully. "Would it be a boy or a girl?"

"I don't know," I answered honestly, relief flowing through my body. He doesn't seem totally against the idea.

Suddenly, his eyes flashed with excitement. "Can we pick?"

I laughed. "No, we don't get to pick."

"Who gets to pick?"

Dr. Jane had reminded me that Riley was an inquisitive child and would probably ask a lot of questions. She also suggested that I keep my explanations vague until I was actually showing. It would be hard to explain to Riley that a baby was growing inside of me. But if he could actually touch my growing tummy, this would give him a better understanding and help him bond with the baby.

"We'll let Daddy explain who picks," I replied sweetly. It seemed only fair. I was doing the hard stuff here…

"Does Daddy know we're getting a baby?" Riley asked excitedly.

"Not yet. That's the secret."

I noted that Riley was using the phrase "getting a baby," as if we were just going to store and picking one out. He had absolutely no frame of reference, so I was content with letting him visualize the situation that way, at least for now.

"Will you help me tell him?"

Riley nodded willingly, and I hugged him close.

"Thanks," I grinned. "But I want you to understand something. Listen very closely."

The little boy stared at me with rapt attention. I gently tousled his hair.

"I love you so much. Your daddy loves you so much. And you will be the best big brother in the whole world."

We hugged once more just as the rain finally began to fall. Quickly, I grabbed my phone and snapped a picture of our sand castle. I showed the picture to Riley, and he grinned happily. Hand-in-hand, we walked to the car, and as he buckled himself into his booster seat, I heard his soft whisper.

"I hope we get a girl," Riley said.


"We're home!" I announced as we made our way through the sparsely decorated living room. The movers had worked quickly and efficiently, and all that remained in this room was the sofa and Riley's piano.

"Remember," I whispered down to Riley. I placed my finger over my lips, and he nodded and giggled excitedly.

"Finally," Edward appeared from the hallway leading to his study. His face was etched with relief as he pulled Riley into his arms. "I expected to hear from you after your appointment."

"I'm sorry," I murmured as he softly kissed my cheek and led us to the couch. "After the appointment, I went to Riley's school and volunteered for a few hours."

"Then we went to the park," Riley announced happily as he snuggled onto his father's lap. "Mommy helped me build the best sand castle ever….."

Edward's surprised eyes flashed to my face. And with that magic word, I was crying again.

"It's okay. She's just happy," Riley clarified to his father. I giggled as I wiped away my tears.

"We had a talk about my constant crying," I explained softly. He leaned over and kissed my temple.

"I see…" Edward glanced at the little boy on his lap. "And these are all happy tears?"

"Yep," Riley said. His eyes swept to me, and his voice dropped to a whisper. "Can we tell him now?"

Dr. Jane also reminded me that Riley was five-years-old. This secret couldn't stay a secret for long.

"Yes," I whispered softly before turning my attention to Edward. "We have something for you."

Riley leapt out of his father's arms and raced to his backpack. He quickly unzipped it and pulled the tiny, wrapped box out of the bag. Riley rushed back to his place on the sofa and snuggled into his father's lap.

"What's this?" Edward wondered, and he shook the box. It made a slight rattling noise, which was actually pretty perfect considering what was wrapped inside.

Riley giggled. "Bella…I mean, Mommy…..let me pick the words."

"The words?" Edward smiled softly at me and brushed the tears away from my cheeks.

Stupid tears!

"Hurry, Daddy…." Riley groaned as he tugged on the gift wrap.

"Okay, okay," Edward grinned as he carefully unwrapped the package.

I took a deep breath, but I found that I didn't really need it. Telling the man you love…the man you're marrying…that you're pregnant with his child should be the most nerve-wracking moment of your life, shouldn't it? A complete surprise – although it probably shouldn't be considering we'd done nothing to prevent it – but still…this would be a complete surprise to him and to our family. Shouldn't I be a little concerned? Shouldn't I be nervous? Considering my history, shouldn't I be scared?

But I didn't feel any of those things. All I felt was peace and a sense of completion…as if the puzzle pieces were all there, and the picture was almost complete.

Sometimes the most perfect and most beautiful things in life are effortless.

My mother's words washed over me while I watched Edward's astonished face as he lifted the tiny silver rattle from the confines of the gift box.

I had prepared myself for this moment, trying to decide on the perfect words. How do you tell the man you love that you're carrying his child?

"We're getting a baby!" Riley's happy voice echoed around the empty room.

That's how you tell him.

Edward's bright green eyes glanced at Riley... then back to the rattle…..and then his penetrating gaze settled on my face.

"We're…" Edward's voice was just a whisper. "…a baby…..?"

"Read the inscription," I whispered tearfully. His glowing eyes flashed to the rattle and peered closely at the engraving.

My big brother loves me.

~Baby Cullen~

2011

"We're getting a baby!" Riley squealed again, and this time, we heard the crashing of pans coming from the kitchen.

"Riley," I murmured as Edward's eyes remained transfixed on the rattle in his hand. "It sounds like Carmen just dropped a pan of cookies. Why don't you go help her?"

"Can I tell her the secret?"

"Yes."

He jumped out of Edward's lap and raced toward the kitchen. The room was suddenly too quiet, and I fidgeted nervously as Edward continued staring in awe at the rattle.

"Say something," I begged softly. Wasn't he happy?

Edward blinked rapidly and turned his head toward me. "We're getting a baby?"

"We're having a baby," I clarified. "This wasn't something I could explain to our son, but he understood getting a baby…so….."

"Our son….." Edward whispered softly. "He's calling you mommy…."

"I know…."

"And you don't have the flu…"

I shook my head no.

"We're really having a baby?" His voice was incredulous.

"Yes," I replied meekly. "Dr. Molina thinks February…" The expression on Edward's face was unlike anything I'd ever seen. This wasn't the reaction I'd been expecting at all.

Wasn't he happy?

I would literally die – right here in this high-rise penthouse – if he was anything short of ecstatic.

I watched as Edward placed a soft kiss against the inscription on the rattle before gently placing it back in its box. He carefully placed the box to the side and lowered himself to the floor. He was kneeling before me, his eyes gazing reverently into my face. With the softest of touches, Edward brushed each side of my face with his fingertips.

"Words cannot describe how much I love you," he murmured adoringly. "This morning, I woke up before the alarm and just watched you sleep. I have memorized every curve of your face….the flutter of your eyelashes….the way you breathe when you're sleeping peacefully."

His hands trailed down my body, finally resting on my stomach. Gently, he lifted the hem of my blouse, and I sighed as his fingers brushed across my skin.

"And as I was staring at you, I actually thought to myself that there was no way that I could possibly love you more than I did right in that moment…but now….."

He leaned closer and pulled my shirt higher. I gasped as he lowered his head and placed sweet, worshipful kisses along my stomach.

"You've given me everything I've ever wanted, Bella. You own me, heart and soul. And I know now that I'll never love you enough. Every single day, I've fallen a little more in love with you, and I know that this is how it's going to be for the rest of my life."

The tears streamed down my cheeks, and Edward gently lifted his hand, wiping them away.

"We're having a baby," he whispered softly, and I noticed a tear trickle down his cheek, as well. I sniffled and placed my fingertip along his face.

"Everything has happened so fast," I murmured gently. I cupped his face in my hand, and he melted into my touch. "It's so hard to keep up….so hard to process it all…."

"I know," Edward whispered, taking my hand away from his face and placing a soft kiss against my palm. "But, honestly, when you remove all of the drama, it's actually pretty easy. I love you. You love me. We have a beautiful son and a baby on the way. We're buying your dream house, and we're getting married."

"You make it sound so simple," I smiled happily. He chuckled and kissed my hand again.

"It is simple," Edward assured me. "So what if we didn't do things in order? So what if it's been a whirlwind? Look at what we have now…."

"It was all worth it," I whispered softly. And I knew it was true. My misery with Jacob….his loveless marriage to Jessica….every ounce of heartbreak had brought us here.

It was worth every minute.

"I can't wait to be your wife," I murmured, and the smile reflected on his face made my heart soar.

"I can't wait to be your husband," Edward sighed softly…and then he leaned down once again, placing a soft kiss on my exposed stomach.

"And I can't wait to be your daddy," he whispered.


It was one week later, and the house was finally vacant. The movers had made their last sweep of the penthouse – Riley's piano had been the last to go – and Carmen and Riley had gone to Edward's parents for the night. We'd made reservations at a hotel in hopes of getting a good night's sleep and getting an early start on all of the unpacking that was waiting for us at the new house.

The penthouse had sold easily and quickly, and the newlyweds – a doctor and his wife – were eager to move in as soon as possible. Edward had deposited the money from the sell of the penthouse into both Riley's and Baby Cullen's newly formed college funds at the bank. Their mutual account balances were obscene and outrageous, but I knew it was no use pointing it out to their father. He was too happy these days, and I refused to rain on his parade.

I stood out on the balcony one last time and looked out across the Seattle skyline. It really was beautiful up here. I peered down at the sidewalk and remembered how I felt the first time I saw this extravagant building. It screamed of money and excess, and I remembered wondering how an unemployed school teacher from Forks had found herself as a nanny in this high-rise apartment building.

I noticed the people below, and I lifted my hand and waved – not knowing or caring if they could even see me. If they could see me, I wondered what they'd think of me. Would they think I was a privileged just because I lived on the 27th floor in a penthouse apartment? Would they believe that my life was picture perfect without a care in the world?

Perhaps.

But would they also understand that – within the confines of this spectacular penthouse with its panoramic view – I had found everything I'd ever wanted? The love of my life, my beautiful son, my unborn child, a loving friend….

It was those things that were priceless.

"I've always been afraid of heights," Edward's velvet voice interrupted my musings. I sighed as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against his shoulder.

"I just wanted one last look," I murmured gently, and he tightened his arms around me.

"Will you miss it?"

"No," I replied simply. "How could I possibly miss it? Look at all that I'm getting in return."

Edward brushed his lips against my temple and pulled me closer to the edge. He held onto me tightly as he gently leaned us over the rail.

"I thought you were afraid," I whispered. He just smiled and pointed to the sidewalk below us.

"Look at that couple down there," Edward murmured against my ear. "They're looking up at us."

Sure enough, an old couple was gazing up at the building. Whether they were actually looking at us – or if they could even see us at this distance – was debatable.

"What do you think they'd say about us…if they could even see us?" I asked with a grin.

"Hmm…" Edward kissed the hollow below my ear. "They might assume we were arrogant assholes living in our big, penthouse apartment…."

I giggled as his mouth nipped at my earlobe. "I hope they don't think that."

"What do you hope they see?" Edward asked tenderly…so tenderly that I couldn't resist turning around in his arms and gazing into his beautiful face. I tenderly stroked his cheek.

"I hope they see two imperfect people who found perfection in each other."

Edward's face softened as he pulled me close.

"My Bella," he whispered longingly, and I sighed as his mouth sweetly caressed mine.


The epilogue is next. It may be in two parts. We'll have to see.

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