So what I didn't knock. It's not like they were doing something I've never seen before. I mean, come on. Get a fucking room already. I don't complain about what Eric does in his office (it is his office) but he should lock the door.

Knock. Yeah, right.

I'll knock if I feel like it. This stupid fucking costume itches. It's annoying the hell out of my skin. I swear, if I didn't know any better he sprayed garlic oil in the lining. And I'm not smiling. I don't give a shit what he does.

Here comes Sookie with a big smile on her face. She's going to rub it in. I just know it.

"Hey, Pam." Snap! "Can I get a picture with you? Make sure you smile nice and purty for me too!" she throws her head back as she laughs.

If she weren't Eric's, I'd snap her little neck. But I don't. What? She's teasing me and I don't like to be teased.

I pull my lips back from my teeth. That's all the smile she's going to get. Her arm goes around my waist and she leans into me. Well, this makes the whole ordeal somewhat bearable. At least her, I like. These other breathers are really cramping my style. Standing at the door looking like the douche of the week is not how I like to spend my time. And Eric hung a picture of me in that maid's outfit right about where I'm standing.

"Thanks, sweetie! I'll be sure to tell Eric you played nice-nice. And hey, I'll try to get him to lay off. This is pretty bad. Even I would be embarrassed. You're handling this like a champ."

She almost makes me want to smile. Almost.

I poke my tongue out instead.