Epilogue ~ Earth

One Day Like This

Rigby's cries of anger and annoyance could be heard all around the house that day. The little raccoon did his best to try and convince the gumball machine to let him stay somehow and work with his friend and love. No matter how much begging and pleading he did though, Benson refused by saying the exact same thing, every time.

"I don't see why you're angry at me," Benson said with a frown. "Mordecai was the one who fired you. I didn't do anything this time."

"Well you forced him," Rigby screamed as he pointed at the gumball machine feverishly.

"I didn't force him to do anything," the gumball machine retorted, a grin forming on his face. "Shouldn't you be happy at least? He chose to be with you, didn't he?"

Rigby quieted himself. He wasn't going to complain about the outcome to this whole ordeal, no matter how much he wanted to yell about the path that got him there. He finally had the blue jay all to himself, and he was ecstatic about that, but he wasn't particularly pleased that he lost his job and was being thrown out of the house in the process. Not to mention that he has to go live with Don until he gets back on his feet.

"Well I am happy," the raccoon surrendered. "But…"

He looked down at his feet and began to look all pouting. He hoped he could get some sympathy from someone in the room.

"I don't wanna go work for my brother," he whined.

The inhabitants of the room all groaned at his complaining and walked their separate ways. Rigby was surprised to find the park staff giving him a going away party, even if it was a little half hearted. Still, the thought was there, and Rigby did get a new video game the staff pitched in to get him. Thinking about it, they all knew they shouldn't have. He'll probably be playing it for the next month while ignoring the work that his brother will be giving him.

"Oh c'mon Rigbone," Don exclaimed as he knelt down next to his big brother. "It'll be great! You get to be my assistant!"

Don said all this with such an exciting and earnest tone that it almost made it sound believable. In reality, it was going to be a busy, boring, and overall aggravating job to have to deal with in the end. At some point in the future, the poor raccoon will start pulling his fur out in frustration. Luckily, three months from now, Rigby would end up finding a new job at the arcade he and Margaret had their date many moons ago. He would still be the weird one, and nobody would really like him, but much like the park, he wouldn't care either way. As long as he had Mordecai, he would be content with anything. But until then…

"Yeah Don," Rigby moaned in a sarcastic manner, "it's gonna be a blast."

"C'mon bro," the taller raccoon continued, "I know exactly what'll make you feel better."

Don winked and spread his arms out in front of the smaller furry animal. A giant smile appeared on his face as he asked for "sugar" in a questionable tone.

Rigby rolled his eyes at his brother and responded by turning on his heel and walking away from the interaction. There was no way in hell he was going to get caught in those arms once again.

"Alright then," Don said with excitement, "we can save it for later! You owe me some sugar later, okay?"

The small man shivered at the thought of giving his brother "that" and tried to push it out of his mind, no matter how inevitable it was. As he was walking away, he heard his brother make a beeline for Muscle Man, offering him the same "sugar" he had just been asked to take. Rigby hoped that Muscle Man would reject him and maybe even give his other brother a good slap, but knew that Don's charismatic nature wouldn't allow that. Rigby didn't feel like turning around to see the two men in a hug. The thought disturbed him.

The raccoon walked into the kitchen, away from the low yammering party, searching for someone specific. Low and behold, there was Mordecai sitting down at the table, conversing with Margaret and Skips. Well… not as much conversing as listening to Skips explain to Margaret what key does what to her new home.

"And this one," Skips went on, holding a key up, "is for your room. I made sure to put a door on the other side of the room that leads outside just in case you don't want to go through the front door."

"Well that's sweet of you," Margaret said with a smile. "That'll make my dates go a little bit smoother."

"Speaking of that," Skips added as he looked at Margaret it in the eye.

"What's going on in here?" Rigby asked as he pulled up a chair next the group. He noticed Mordecai glance over at him with a smile. The raccoon smiled back and scooted his chair closer to his boyfriend. Their hands clasped together as soon as they were close enough.

"Moving," Margaret groaned as she began to add the three keys on the table to her key ring. She sighed as she squeezed them though the thin opening of the metal loops. "Benson doesn't want Mordecai and I living under the same roof. Says it'll cause 'complications'."

The ring clicked back together as the last key fell against the others inside the loop. "He thinks we're going to cause more trouble," she finished as she pocketed her keys.

"Can you blame him?" Skips said in his usual raspy tone. "You all did destroy the house and almost kill every living thing in this park. I'm surprised he just didn't fire all three of you. He's lucky Mr. Maelard didn't fire him."

"True," Margaret responded, "but does he really think that's going to be enough to keep the three of us apart?"

Everyone at the table exchanged glances at one another.

"I didn't think so," she finished. A smug chuckle escaped her beak a second later, cementing her ideals.

Mordecai rolled his eyes at his old crush. "You're starting to sound like Rigby."

Margaret giggled and looked at the blue jay with sneaky eyes. "Well isn't that a good thing? Doesn't that make me more attractive to you?" she joked.

She watched as Mordecai and Rigby's expressions changed to a more disapproving one. Apparently, those were the wrong choice of words for her to use in the situation. It was understandable though. Mordecai was still trying to get over her after deciding to be with Rigby, and Rigby knew that the slightest nudge could send him back over the edge. Not only did Rigby approve of Mordecai and Margaret living apart, he encouraged Skips to make the back door on the house so that her dates could go much more smoothly.

"Sorry," Margaret said, "didn't mean for it to sound so um… slutty."

Rigby let out a chuckle of his own as he glared evilly at Margaret. "Don't worry about it. It's all a part of my plan! Soon everyone in the world will think and act like me," the raccoon laughed, "and then I shall rule the world!"

He let out a fake evil laugh and acted a goof as he usually did. Margaret followed along giving her own devilish laugh in the process. They both died down a few moments later when they realized no one cared. The two did continue to chuckle under their breath about it though.

"Spoiled sport," Margaret said to Mordecai.
"You're no fun," Rigby said to Skips.

Mordecai smiled as he watched both Margaret and Rigby laugh together about the same stupid things. He wasn't surprised by this actually, as they had actually learned to get along with each other over the past few months. What he was worried about at the time, though, was that their friendship might end when Mordecai chose Rigby instead of Margaret. And yet, there they were, laughing and playing like it was nothing at all. However, he did notice the resentment the two of them oozed at him self, mostly for the whole black hole thing. But Mordecai let them use him as a punching bag, and that seemed to help vent some frustration about the whole event.

"Whatever dude," Mordecai said with a grin. "Shouldn't we be getting the rest of your stuff together? You start your new job as Don's secretary tomorrow."

"I'M NOT HIS SECRETARY," the raccoon bellowed. "I'm his assistant…"

"Same thing dude," the blue jay chuckled as he pulled himself away from the chair.

Rigby gritted his teeth together as a growl escaped between the gaps. Margaret laughed at him and put a wing on his shoulder. "Don't worry about it Rigby. Being a secretary is great! You can call me during the day, and we can gossip about everyone behind their backs without anyone knowing."

That actually did sound a little entertaining. And god knows the raccoon was going to need to find some sort of entertainment to get through his shifts. And yet, when he would later get the job at the arcade, he would still be doing the same thing gagging it up with the red robin. Nothing's better than gossip with friends, especially when it's about other friends.

Rigby nodded happily as Margaret took her hand off his shoulder. He then released his hold on Mordecai's wing, and pounced onto his back, climbing his way up to his shoulder, and perching himself there. All the while, he repeatedly grunted "hm-hm-hm" in defiance to his lover. Mordecai let out a huff of laughter as he felt the raccoon's legs sling over his shoulder, and his head rest against the top of his own.

"You two play nice now," Margaret told them as she watched the duo disappear out of the kitchen. Her attention returned to Skips a moment later who looked as though he would rather be outside working than there. "Anything else I should know before I head back to the party?"

"Not really," Skips said with a vacant stare. "Just make sure to have your stuff moved in before the end of the day, today." He had forgotten to talk to Margaret about dating rules in the shack. He'd remember later though.

Margaret nodded and stood up from the table. She was about to walk away when Benson came in with an exhausted look about his face. He walked over to the table, pulled up a chair next to Skips, sat down, and slammed his head against the table top. Margaret smiled as she watched her employer act out in his usual stressed way. When she watched Skips sling his arm around the gumball machines neck and let it rest over his shoulder, Margaret sighed and rolled her eyes.

"What do you know," she said to herself, "Teragram was right."

She stamped her foot on the ground and exclaimed, "and you people wonder why I'm still single!" catching the attention of everyone around her. "It's because all the good guys are running off with other men! Ugh!"

She began stomp out of the kitchen, noticing that everyone was watching her quizzically. She felt a wave of embarrassment sweep over her.

"And now I look like a lunatic," she muttered as she walked through the living room, making a straight shot for the front door.

Right as she was about to exit, she was stopped when someone grabbed on to her shoulder.

"Where do you think you're going?" Don asked her with enthusiasm. "You haven't given me any sugar since I got here!"

The red robin grunted as she heard the man's voice. She really didn't feel like turning around and having her eyes go straight to his crotch again. His body still disturbed her slightly.

"Ummm," she started, "I'm kind of not in a sugar sort of mood Don. Can we take a rain check on that?"

"Rain check sounds good to me," the tall raccoon said out with a smile. "How about next Saturday at seven o'clock after work?"

It took Margaret a moment to process what he just said. Did he seriously just ask her out on a date? The first thing that hit her mind was an emphatic "NO". But she didn't say it. Instead she thought about it. Don did seem kind of sweet, when she wasn't looking at his nether regions, or his strangely shaped body. And he did seem like the type of caring person she was looking for. Not only that, but she needed to get back into the habit of dating somehow.

"Sure," she said without even turning around. "But only if you promise to wear some pants."

Which he did.


Mordecai stuffed whatever was left of his friends belonging into the oversized travel bag and zipped it up. It got caught halfway there, but instead of fixing the zipper he just left it as is and forgot about it. Rigby would just throw everything of his in random directions anyways as soon as he got to Don's, so it wasn't like it would make any difference what so ever.

The blue jay looked over at his little friend on the bed. The raccoon was on his back looking up at the ceiling, tracing the outline of the sunshine coming in through the window of the room. His thoughts were scrambling back and forth about what had happened and how everything turned out. He had found himself doing that a lot lately.

He still couldn't believe how everything panned out. The overly excitable raccoon was absolutely sure he was going to come out of this whole ordeal with the short end of the stick, probably alone and unhappy, but still content that his friends were happy. But that wasn't how it ended up being. In fact, it turned out better than he had originally wanted. Everyone ended up happy, if not still a little agitated and concerned with one another and their sanity. But at least Rigby ended up getting the man of his dreams, as girly as that sounded.

"Hey, hey," Mordecai alerted, "earth to Rigby, you still there?"

The bird began to wave his wing in front of the raccoon's face, hoping to alert his lover. It didn't work at first. The little bundle was still too far deep in thought.

"Hm, wha," Rigby whispered as his friend began to catch his attention finally. "I'm here, I'm here!"

Mordecai chuckled and sat on the edge of the bed. "No you aren't dude. You're laying there thinking about me."

"So what if I am?" Rigby replied. "It's not my fault I keep thinking about how bad you want me."

"How bad I want…?" Mordecai broke off. "I wasn't the one who's been totally gay for me since like forever."

"STOP-"

"-talking," the blue jay finished his outburst. "We already know that part Rigby."

Mordecai allowed more laughter to escape his beak as he teased his boyfriend.

Boyfriend…

He never thought he would ever be calling Rigby that one day. That word was familiar to him, but he just never thought he would actually be using it to describe his feelings for his best friend some day. Was anything going to be different between the two of them now? Would they still act like crazy best friends, or would it be more serious? Those kind of thoughts scared him. Mordecai still wasn't sure if he should be acting any different around Rigby because of it.

Rigby sat up from the bed and placed himself next to the bird. He looked at his new loves face and tried to figure out what was wrong.

"You okay, bro?" the raccoon asked as he snatched up Mordecai's wing in his own. "You don't look so good."

"Yeah," the blue jay replied. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just fine… fine…"

"You're thinking about us aren't you?"

Mordecai flinched. How was it that Rigby was always able to figure out what was wrong with him? They really had been together far too long. Why they hadn't ever actually "gotten together" after all that time was beyond him.

"A little," Mordecai replied.

"Liiiiiiiike…?" Rigby pestered.

The avian sighed and looked down at his best friend. "It's just weird, ya know. I still haven't gotten over the fact that we're, like, together together now. I just never thought I'd be… together together with you."

Rigby smiled at Mordecai and leaned against him, putting the bulk of his weight against the side of the bird. "Well then why did you choose me?"

"Well because…"

Mordecai looked at those deep endless abysses in Rigby's eyes. They were welcoming and so inviting. He didn't need to answer why he chose the raccoon over the robin. His answer was already in there, and Rigby already knew why anyways.

The blue jay leaned down slightly and rubbed his beak against the raccoon's furry cheek, causing Rigby to let out a fit of laughter. The animal wasted no time in attacking the bird's mouth in a kiss, letting their passion run free for a few moments before escaping back into reality.

They both peered into each others souls happily. That moment was perfect for the both of them, giving each other all the answers to the questions that neither of them really needed to ask. Still, Mordecai wasn't 100% convinced.

"So," he started in a soft voice, "this is gonna work out, right? You and me, I mean."

Rigby leaned up and gave the bird a quick kiss on his beak. "Yeah. Why wouldn't it? It's worked this long for us, right?"

Mordecai snorted out some more laughter and hugged the raccoon close to him. The feeling of fur against his feathers made it all seem worth while. Those warm and soft little cushions that surrounded Rigby's body always found a way to make him feel better about anything. Years and years from now, he would still enjoy that feeling every time.

One Day Like This – Elbow

Fin ~ Earth


Ending Two of Three