Who You'd Be Today
Kenny Chesney
Beckett dies when she was shot and now Castle is mourning her death. He remembers all the good times they had. And wonders what could have been.
He sat down in his chair at her desk. Looked around the precinct. Didn't care that the new Captian didn't want him there. It seemed that the sunny days seemed to hurt the most. He wears the pain like a heavy coat. He still feels her everywhere. He sees her smile, and her face, and hears her laughing in the rain. But most of all, he still cannot believe that she is gone. He can't handle it anymore. He gets up and walks out. He doesn't know why but he rushes to her grave and sits there for at least an hour before finally speaking.
"It ain't fair, you died too young. Like the story that had just begun. But death tore the pages all away. God know how much I miss you, and all the hell that I have been through, just knowing no-one could take your place. And sometimes I wonder: Who you'd be today?"
He just looked at her grave marker. And next to it was her mother's he just couldn't believe that she was really there. He sometimes hoped that she would knock on his door and say she was on vacation or something.
"Would you see the world? Would you chase your dreams? Settle down with a family? I wonder what you would name your kids, well besides Johanna. Cause I know you would have wanted that. And sometimes the sky is so blue, and I feel like I can talk to you. And I know that might sound crazy, but it just isn't fair that you died to young."
In the distance he could see the outline of her and that smile. That smile that made him melt every time. And even though he knew that she would never come back, he prayed and hoped every day. He turned to leave but quickly turned back and said, "Sunny days seem to hurt the most, I wear the pain like a heavy coat. The only thing that gives me hope, is I know I'll see you again someday. And when that time comes. Just know, that I love you. Always."
He spent more than half his time at the cemetery bringing her flowers and just talking to her like she was still there. And the time that he was not there, he spent searching for her mother's killer.
Five years later, he can finally go to her grave and tell her that the man who killed her mother, and the whole organization behind it was done. That they were all either dead, on death row, or going to spend the rest of their lives rotting in a fifteen by fifteen cell.
Twenty years later Richard Castle died. The only thing that he requested when he died was to be buried as close to Katherine Beckett as he could be. He didn't care about anything else. He just wanted to be near her. He would get his wish. He would reunite with her. In heaven. And even though it felt like it was a million years later, he didn't care. Because he got to see her again. He got to hear her laugh, and cry and he got to feel her love again. Because no matter what anyone ever said, they loved each other.
Always.
