Hey sorry for the long wait, I was doing nanowrimo, but I gave it up so I could write for you guys again. Anyway I just finished this now and am not reading over it so ignore any mistakes, plus it is like twice the size of a normal chapter. The new gymnasts in the chapter mentioned are the ones who won being written in so say hi! I have one more spot to write in so the new challenge is going to be who can guess where the invitational will be held- hint, it is NOT in the US, and it is REALLY obvious.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! Even to those who don't celebrate, be very thankful for what you have because there are many people in the world who don't have anything. And be especially thankful for your family because one day they might not be there and you will miss them trust me.

XOXO,Meg

If my life had been a movie, now would be when the inspirational music would start playing to accompany my struggle and finally my triumph.

Some song like Superchicks' Get Up, would play as a montage of my training and constant dedication played.

I'm not afraid to fall
It means I climbed up high
to fall is not to fail
you fail when you don't try

I would be climbing what seemed to be an impossibly high rope my legs held in an 'L' position up and down as people with clipboards marked my progress.

You fail when you don't try
I'm not afraid to fall
I might just learn to fly and
I will spread these wings of mine

The next scene would show me swinging on the uneven bars as I practiced a difficult release over and over, finally nailing it perfectly.

If I get up I might fall back down again
So let's get up come on
If I get up I might fall back down again
We get up anyway
If I get up I might fall back down again
So let's get up come on
If I get up I might fall back down again
And I might fall back down again
We'll just jump and see, even if it's the 20th time
we'll just jump and see if we can fly

I would be seen attempting tricks on each of the apparatuses; falling, but getting back up until I didn't fall any more.

I'm not afraid to fall
and here I told you so
don't want to rock the boat
but I just had to know
Just a greener side
or can I touch the sky
but either way I will have tried

It would cut to a scene of me wobbling on beam, but catching my balance, and then leaping up impossibly high; joy written all over my face.

I'm not afraid to fall
I've fallen many times
they laughed when I fell down
But I have dared to climb
I'm not afraid to fall
I know I'll fall again
But I will win this in the end

There would be a flashback of all the hard times in my career as a gymnast, including one of Tanya and her cronies laugh as I face planted in front of everyone, then their look of shock as I was offered a spot on the team before them. I would triumphantly stand proud in front of them, accepting the selection gracefully.

Yup that's exactly what would happen if my life were a movie. Bu unfortunately I was living in the real world, and the real world was never what the movies made it seem to be.

Sure the next few days were a test of my skills, as the selection committee, headed by Marta, made their decision on who would make up the American team.

The first day wasn't too bad it was mostly conditioning exercises and showing the mastery of our hardest skills.

When we ended our session early that day I wasn't done. I had a plan in place and I had to put it into action quickly.

By the time the second day rolled around, I wasn't ready to use it yet, but I knew that if I could just force my way through my routines, everything would fall into place.

This day was a little harder than the previous because it was do or die time. Each gymnast competed with their hardest routines as though in an actual competition. The only difference is we never received our score so no one knew who was in the lead and who needed to work harder.

Finally I had done all that I could have, and it was up to the committee. I lined up with the other gymnasts, in height order as we did at the end of the last practice of each session.

Marta called forward the three gymnasts who scored the highest in the overall conditioning tests taken throughout the week. As she called the gymnasts' names out, each stepped forward to applause.

"Zoe Taylor." The girl standing next to me at 5'3" with dark hair and dark eyes stepped forward. She was almost 16, and was a new senior from the list of last year's up and coming juniors. She was a beautiful uneven bars worker with long lines, and graceful pirouetting skills.

"Jaymie Streleckis." *(last names have been changed.) A compact blond with blue eyes from San Diego Ca, stepped forward as well. She was an awesome beamer *(a.n. nickname for someone good on beam), and also newly 16, and therefore newly qualified to compete internationally.

Kaity R was the third highest scorer in the overall conditioning test, with me as a close runner up. We still didn't know who had scored overall in the competition though.

"Not too much to talk" about, Marta said in conclusion. "Let's have a good working time. All come back happy and ready to go with our very high goals."

As though we were a perfectly rehearsed chorus, we all spoke together, "Thank you, Marta, coaches, and national staff. Good-bye."

Following this sign of respect each of us stepped forward according to height. Marta cupped each gymnast's face between her hands, and leaned down to whisper in their ears. To some she whispered constructive criticism, others words of wisdom, to all, she offered encouragement. Finally it was my turn; I walked up to the woman who had taught me so much. She cupped my cheeks and whispered in my ear four words, "It's up to you."

Just four words, but they held all the meaning in the world and needed no clarification. I knew what she meant, that only I could decide how far I could take myself.

I turned in a balletic motion, and walked to the door, my head held high, and my posture straight as each gymnast before me had done. It was like a dance, and for some of us it would be our Swan's song until the next competition, for others it was just the opening act.

(a.n. I could end it here, but that would be mean, so I will keep going)

"Bella relax will you?" Kaity said. "All that pacing is making me nervous!"

"Sorry I can't help it," I replied. Plopping down beside her, I then began jiggling my leg nervously. Ten seconds later I was back to pacing inside the vestibule of the main gym. It was almost time for us to find out who had made the team, and the wait was killing me. I had gone for a run to work off my nervous energy earlier, but we all had to be back by six and it was now six thirty with still no word.

The queue of gymnasts lined up behind me was growing more restless by the second. Some showed their nerves by pacing nervously like me, but others like Tanya, took their anxiety out in a different manner. "Did you see that step she took on vault," she said loudly pointing to one of the younger gymnasts and making it clear to everyone what she was saying. "She'll never make the team with a landing like that. She didn't stick she sucked."

I had gotten fed up with her messing with the newer gymnasts, they didn't deserve her crap. Well no one deserved her crap, but at least the rest of us were used to it. I opened my mouth to say something, but Kaity beat me to the punch.

"Sucked? Are you sure that wasn't you you were thinking of, Tanya? And I do mean in more than one way," she sneered, referring to Tanya's reputation.

"No, but if you ask Edward he might say different," she shot back, but at me instead of Kaity. "Oh, wait. You can't cause he left you."

"Why you…." Kaity started, lunging forward to attack her for me.

But I grabbed her arm. "It's not worth it. She's not worth it." I spoke a little louder to make sure Tanya heard what I said next. "She's just worried she is too washed up to make the team, so she is settling by trying to make everyone else feel worse about themselves. Well guess what? It's not going to work on me, Tanya. I have faced far worse that you could ever dish out and I am still here, so say what you want. Everyone knows just what a pathetic attempt it is."

Before she could retaliate, the door opened and Marta came out. The change in the air became almost palpable. Instantly every gymnast straightened up, and the tension from the almost fight changed into nervous anticipation.

We paraded onto the floor in the traditional gymnastics walk. You know the one where we lift our pointed feet, and swing our flared arms. Yet again when we had lined up we were standing from smallest to tallest.

We faced the judges, and stood there waiting. I smiled, acknowledging the cheers from the other gymnasts gathered to see who would make up the team. It was mostly younger girls and those who hadn't yet qualified but trained with the Karolyi's regularly.

Marta stepped up to speak. I caught sight of Bela in a corner, and I smiled weakly in response of his reassuring smile. I didn't know if he was trying to tell me that I made it, or if he were trying to comfort me because I hadn't.

"And at this time I would like to announce the 2013 U.S. Invitational team. The following athletes have qualified for the team: Jaymie Streleckis, 2012 junior all- around world champion. Zoe Taylor, 2012 Junior National team member. Tanya Denali, 2012 Senior National team member. Kaity R, 2011 Senior National team member. Jackie Bellamy, 2012 Junior American Cup silver medalist. And last but not least, Isabella Swan, reigning Olympic All-Around gold medalist.

I stepped forward to join the rest of the team, but my mind was frozen in shock. I waved and smiled on autopilot. I hadn't realized until right then just how much I wanted… no needed to be a member of this team. It was more than just a competition for me, more than just a comeback, it was my survival. I had been preparing myself for not making the team just in case, and now that I made it I didn't know what to do.

I was spared a response by Marta's further announcements. She named the alternates in case of injury stating, "I hope we do not have to replace any of team, but as we all know, this sport is unpredictable, and replacement may be necessary."

She went on to address the five girls who didn't make neither the team nor the alternate team. "Each and every one of you worked hard to get here. Do not give up because you didn't make this team. There will always be another team, and you will always have a shot if you continue to work hard, and believe in yourself. Stay with us, for yourselves, your teammates, your sport and your country!"

With that closing remark, we were announced to the arena filled with campers, live on gymnasts, reporters, coachers, and FIG committee members.

Once we had walked around the floor area, been displayed to the crowd, and received flowers and our USA warm-up suit jackets, it was time to face the media.

Luckily Marta and Bela kept a tight rein on the reporters, and no questions about Ed… him were asked.

"Bella, how does it feel to be back in competition?"

"Um, I guess I will have to let you know when I get there," I answered.

"Have you prepared anything new, or should we look forward to seeing routines from London?"

"With the new quadrennium, I have had to rework my routines somewhat, and with not being in the shape I was last summer, I made some of my routines a little easier for the time being. On the other hand I have added some new difficulties where I could, so I think the overall combination should be nice."

"What are your goals for this competition? Can we expect to see another medal sweep?"

"Well right now, I kind of just want to get my feet wet so to speak. It will be a little hard getting back into the swing of competition, so I will be concentrating on getting myself where I want to be before concentrating on medals. My first priority right now is the team competition and I am just planning on going slow with everything. At this point I think it is better for me to get comfortable and secure rather than pushing myself too hard and losing more ground that way."

The interviews went on that way for a while, but finally I was able to escape to the sanctuary of my room. Opening up my computer, I logged onto my site for the first time in months.

After some hesitation, I posted this message to my fans;

Hi guys, Bella here. Preparing for competition once again. Sorry for not posting for awhile, but trying to get back into the swing of things. Don't forget to watch next week on Universal Sports!

Keep aiming for your dreams,

Bell

When I went to bed that night, I was truly happy for the first time in a long time. I knew that I was nowhere near healed, but I was better, and getting stronger every day. I still missed the things that I had lost, but I was becoming even more grateful for what I did have; my gymnastics. I knew that the two weeks would be tough, but I knew now that I could handle anything that came my way.