Chapter 29
Sitting on the bed Daryl had made us in my childhood bedroom while he moved our most prized possessions back into the room caused me to have mixed emotions. "Lucky, ya okay?" he asked as unloaded the cradle that I had packed this morning with my journals.
I shrugged my shoulders as I leaned back against the headboard with my hands folded over my large stomach that was ready to pop at any time. "I'm just not used to laying around all day anymore." I complained with a frown. I had been on pretty strict bed rest since we had come back from our little mini vacation to the cabin. The day after we had gotten back I was outside working in the greenhouse when severe pains in my lower stomach caused me to cry out and crumble to the floor. Without modern technology Dakota and Bob couldn't determine exactly what was wrong with me but had requested that I go on bed rest until Baby Dixon was born.
Daryl stopped what he was doing and made his way to the bed, sitting down beside me. "I know, Lucky, but we ain't got much longer to go." He whispered as his hands joined mine over where our baby was doing summersaults.
Nodding in agreement I sighed heavily. "I'm just worried that the gardens won't be done right. And that could be really bad for all of us. Then there's the root cellars. And the greenhouse." I rambled anxiously.
"You gave everybody detailed books about all that so it'll be fine. We all got your back, Lucky. Calm down so Lilly can, will ya?. Michie, Judy, and Avie are comin' when the boy gets done eatin'." He said as he pressed a quick kiss to my stomach then my lips before going back to placing our stuff on the shelves to make the room ours again. I hated the idea of moving back into the main house before it was time to have the baby but with the complications that had sprung up with my pregnancy it was the better option. This way I wasn't truly alone while Daryl was busy during the day. With both Lori and Michonne still recovering from their deliveries company was not on short supply. Both women had given birth just three days apart almost two weeks ago.
Michonne had delivered a beautiful little girl that they named Avonlea. The sweet baby was so tiny when she was born but other than barely weighing six pounds she had a head of curly hair and a great set of lungs. Carl and Judith both were enamored with their baby sister until she started crying, then it was time to give her back to her mom and dad.
Lori had given birth just three days after Michonne welcoming her third child into the world. Her and Andrew were proud new parents of a big boy that they named Evan. He weighed over eight pounds when he was born which caused Lori to shoot Andrew some very dirty looks whenever how chunky he was happened to be mentioned. Evan was the biggest of her three children.
Just as Daryl placed the last of my journals onto the shelf there was a knock on the door. "That must be the girls." I told Daryl as he brought Lilly's cradle to put next to the bed. "Come in." I called out to the closed door.
Michonne peaked her head through the door while Judy squeezed around her legs and barged on into the room. "B! B!" Judy called out as she ran towards me full speed with her long hair trailing behind her loosely.
"Hi, sweetheart. Are you driving your mom's crazy today?" I asked her as Daryl caught her just before she reached the edge of the bed, placing her gently onto the bed next to me with a smirk on his face.
Judith shook her head immediately while Michonne sighed and nodded as she came into the room, settling into rocker Patricia had brought up for me a few days ago. "She's a bundle of energy today for some reason and we're all exhausted. How's bed rest going?"
"Slow and boring." I told her with a shake of my head. "I want to be outside in the gardens or at least outside period where I can make sure things are planted where they need to be planted. It's frustrating not being able to do my part all of a sudden." I complained, causing Daryl and Michonne both to chuckle. "It's not funny." I grumbled sullenly as Judy placed her ear to my stomach to talk to the baby like she used to do Michonne and Lori's stomach's.
Michonne pulled Avie from her sling, handing her to Daryl, before looking at me with a smirk on her face. "Beth, the gardens are coming along just fine. Emily, Mika, and Willow are forces to be reckoned with when it comes to the garden beds and storage buildings." Michonne said with a shake of her head. "They carry your books around with them everywhere and are doing everything exactly as you have taught them to do, Beth. You need to calm down and just enjoy the last of your pregnancy, Bethie."
Sighing I nodded as I played with the ends of Judith's long hair. When she was a baby it was so blonde it was almost white but the older she got the darker it got which wasn't surprising since Lori, Shane, and Rick all had dark brown hair. "I know but the gardens are so important to the survival of this farm. People get angry when they are hungry. I can't help but stress about it." I told her as I watched Daryl walk to the window with Avie cradled in his arms, whispering to her softly.
"You have taught those girls well and trust me when I say they have everything under control until Little Dixon enters the world." Michonne said as she looked between the bed and Daryl who was still talking softly to the tiny little girl. People would never peg the rough around the edges man as being a softy when it came to babies but it was a sweet sight to see even though it was rare to catch. "How excited are you to be almost done with the pregnancy?"
I smiled brightly at her. "I'm not sure which one I'm more excited about. Not being pregnant anymore or watching Daryl hold and talk to our little one the way he does the other babies." I admitted to her as I watched my husband pull baby Avie to his chest when she started whimpering and squirming.
"It is a pretty sweet sight to see and he's so good with all the babies he is going to be an absolutely amazing father." Michonne told me with a wink as we both watched Daryl's cheek go slightly pink.
He shook his head at us as he headed for the bedroom door. "We're leavin'." He told us as he opened the door and left without another word causing us both to laugh as Judy quickly scrambled off the bed and out the door, calling Daryl's name.
"Uncle Daryl! Wait for me!" She called out as she scurried down the hall to where Daryl was waiting for her with her sister resting on his shoulder.
When we were alone Michonne crawled up in the bed next to me and within minutes was sound asleep, leaving me alone with my thoughts. The new momma was tired. I simply laid there beside her reading one of the book Baylee had brought up to me earlier the day from our small library. Books were not a top priority when our people went on runs but it was in the back of everybody's minds to grab any they saw if they had time. While our main people did not go on runs anymore since we were all having children some of the others still made small runs to finish clearing out the local towns around us and block off all the ways to our farm. Normally it was Jesus, Josh with Drew, Taylor, Carl, Enid, and Tara going on runs these days. Rick, Michonne, and Lori didn't really like Carl going on runs but he was a determined young man and had put his foot down saying that it was his job to go find things now that his parents were busy having babies.
I must have dozed off because the next time I blinked open my eyes Daryl was laid in the bed next to me with his hand resting gently on my stomach where our child slept. "How long have I been asleep?" I whispered softly into the quiet room with the only sound coming from the softly whirring ceiling fan above our heads, our breathing, and Trouble's snores.
"Couple hours. It's almost dinner time." He told me as he bent forward to press a kiss to my stomach and then to my lips. "Ya looked beautiful sleepin'."
My cheeks heated up at his compliment because since becoming pregnant he had developed a tendency to watch me sleep whenever he had the opportunity. "Didn't intent to fall asleep at all."
"Y'all needed ta rest." He whispered as he nipped at my lips again.
I moaned as I rolled over into his body, deepening our kiss. "How long 'til dinner?" I groaned as I pushed him onto his back and sitting up across his hips.
"It can wait." He growled as he sat up, sliding his hands up my thighs to grip my hips.
Needless to say, we were late for dinner but nobody said anything to us when we walked into the room with matching smirks on our faces. Obviously we didn't get in this situation by being celibate and it's not like we weren't married.
~*~LUCKY~*~
After three weeks of being cooped up in my childhood bedroom I demanded a new location for the daylight hours. Daryl, Michonne, and Carol were quick to get on my side when Maggie and Dakota began rambling about how it was a bad idea to not stay in bed. We all compromised and agreed that it couldn't hurt if I hung out on the porch swing a few hours a day or on the living room couch as long as I was relaxed and reclined. So today, I was reclining on the porch swing when Mika came running up to me with a big red tomato in her hand. "Look, Miss Beth! We did it!" she said excitedly as she handed me the big juicy and ripe tomato.
Smiling brightly at her I accepted the tomato from her. "This looks so delicious, Mika. I knew I picked the right girls to take over the garden while I had this baby." I praised her as I took a big bite out of the tomato.
She giggled at me as she hopped into the chair that was positioned next to my swing. "Yep. When's the baby coming though? I wanna know if I'm gonna win the bet." She said excitedly. "I've got the next four days picked."
"Bet? You guys are betting on when I'll have the baby?" I asked curiously because this was the first time I had heard about any kind of bet. Taking another bite out of the tomato, I waited for her explanation.
Mika nodded her head. "Yes ma'am. Whoever wins gets a day off work and to pick what's for dessert that night!" She said excitedly, her little legs swinging wildly in her excitement.
I couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculousness of the bet but whatever they wanted to do was fine with me. "Well, sweetheart, I don't know when this baby will decide she's ready to come out and meet y'all but I'll let you know when she does." I told her as I handed her back the tomato to enjoy the rest of it.
"Okay, thanks." She chirped as she grabbed the tomato and scurried quickly off the porch. There was a steady stream of people in and out of that chair all day until it was time to move inside for dinner but my husband wasn't one of them and that kind of worried me. When Carol came up the steps I stopped her quickly. "Hey, have you seen Daryl around today?" I asked her, my nerves fairly noticeable in my voice.
She sighed and took the chair that had only been vacant for about 5 minutes or so. "He's been out tracking a bear all day that Zeke shot from his post. Him and Tyrese are together. They're still not back yet." She admitted softly, the regret clearly evident in her voice.
"Why would he leave the wall without telling me?" I asked in an almost frantic voice, swinging around so my feet were on the porch instead of stretched across the swing.
Carol stood from her chair to join me on the swing, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "Because he didn't want to upset you when you are already having problems with the pregnancy. He didn't want to leave but he is the best tracker we've got." She explained softly.
"And he didn't think I would notice his absence all damn day? That man normally checks up on me at least twenty times a day." I screeched, my stomach tightening the more I got worked up. "Ow." I said as a cramp hit me low in my stomach.
Immediately Carol was kneeling in front of me. "What's wrong, Beth? Calm down and take some deep breaths." She told me as she rubbed soothing circles on my knees in an attempt to calm me down.
"It hurts." I groaned out as I doubled over my stomach as much as I could in an effort to ease the pain. "Oh God, it hurts so bad." I moaned as another pain wracked my stomach and back.
Carol pushed my hair back off my face. "I think it's that time, Beth. Let's get you upstairs so we can get you checked out. Okay?"
I nodded as I let her help me stand up. "I can't have this baby without Daryl here, Carol." I cried as she led me through the door and into the house.
"He'll be back, Beth. He wouldn't stay out overnight knowing you are so close to having the baby." She said in attempt to soothe my ruffled feathers. But it didn't work.
Gripping the banister of the stairs I glared at her. "He never should have left in the first place. Idiot." I told her just as the screen door slammed shut behind us.
"Lucky?!"
I sagged in relief as my husband's voice echoed through the house. "On the stairs, Pookie." Carol called out to him.
When I caught sight of him I gasped because he was covered in blood from head to toe. And stunk. "What the hell happened to you?" I seethed as I turned around to sit on the stairs as another pain wrapped through my stomach.
"Had to fight some walkers for the bear. We won. They lost." He said with a shrug of his shoulders as he knelt in front of me. "I'm sorry, Lucky. Ya okay?" He asked me softly as he reached out to touch my cheek with a single finger to keep from getting me dirty.
I shook my head as tears formed in my eyes. "No, I'm not okay. Your daughter has decided today is a good day to make her appearance and my husband who is not supposed to leave the walls has been gone ALL DAMN DAY!" I practically screamed as another pain caused me to double over.
Carol pushed Daryl around me and up the stairs. "Go get cleaned up while I get Beth settled so Dakota can check her."
Thirty minutes later Daryl walked into our bedroom with his wet hair hanging over his eyes wearing nothing but his sweat pants and a t-shirt. "How could you do that to me?" I asked as he slid into the bed beside me. I was in active labor but was only dilated to a two so it was going to be a while before we had the baby. Dakota said everything looked great and the baby's heartrate was within normal range so I could just labor normally. If I felt like walking the hall then that could speed my labor along but just don't attempt the stairs any time soon.
"I'm sorry, Lucky. I didn't think I'd be gone so long. I had ta try ta get the meat." He explained softly.
I nodded in understanding because I truly did understand how valuable that meat was to our community. "You could've missed our baby being born. I could have lost you. You said we weren't leaving the walls unless we were together and I was stuck on the damn porch." I ranted irritably as another contraction hit me.
Daryl rubbed my back and stomach until the pain subsided. "I know, Lucky, I know. I'm sorry." He whispered as he pressed soft kisses all over my face and head. "I love ya."
"I love you too." I whispered back as I gave in to his sweet side and cuddled into him as we settled in for a long night of laboring.
By the next afternoon we had welcomed baby Lilly Grace Dixon into the world with the help of our closest friend and my sister. Dakota had come in to check on me to make sure everything was okay from a medical stand-point but I was adamant that I didn't want her in the room when I gave birth. Only Maggie, Carol, and Daryl were going to get to witness my whooha being stretched to astronomical proportions.
~*~LUCKY~*~
Being a mother was one of the greatest experiences in the world but it rivalled watching Daryl be a father to our little one. As the weeks and months passed and our daughter grew she wrapped herself tighter and tighter around her daddy's finger. When Lilly was just three weeks old I went back to tending the gardens alongside Mika, Willow, and Emily. Time flew by once I was allowed to actually do something other than sit or lay around all the time. "How's my girls doin' today?" Daryl asked as he stepped through the door of the greenhouse where I was busy prepping my pots for the vegetables that I grew over the winter months. My winter crops weren't as extensive as my summer and fall crops were but it was still nice to have fresh lettuce, cabbage, radishes, turnips, broccoli, spinach, and squash during the winter months.
"We're great. I'm just telling Lilly how important it is to talk to the plants and let them know how much we appreciate their sacrifice to feed us." I told him teasingly as I nodded over to where our daughter was playing with two plastic cups in her walker while Trouble lounged and napped next to her. This was the outside walker because the wheels had long broken off which made it immobile but was great in containing crawling and curious little ones. At four months old Lilly Dixon was a quiet and joyful baby for the most part but she could also hold her own when it came to temper tantrums.
Daryl shook his head as he plucked out chunky baby girl from her 'prison' and tossing her in the air playfully. Her giggles and cackles filled the space around us causing us both to smile. "Don't let Momma's silliness rub off on ya too much, sunshine. Ya ain't gotta talk to the plants to make 'em do what they're suppost ta do." He told her as he caught her and brought her forward to rub his scruff playfully against her neck causing her to squeal and giggle even louder.
"My momma used to talk to the flowers and vegetables so it's just something I grew up doing and do now to help keep her memory alive." I explained as I turned back to planting my pots of cabbages.
Daryl groaned when he realized the reasoning behind my silliness of talking to the plants I tended to daily but I refused to turn around and acknowledge him first. "Lucky…" He whispered as he stepped up behind me, placing his now empty hands on my hips. "I didn't know."
I nodded in acknowledgement but the sting of tears in my throat kept me from speaking aloud.
"Ya talk to them plants all ya want. And teach Lilly ta do it too. Cause her Granny done it." He told me firmly against the side of my head. "Love you."
"I love you too." I croaked out as I leaned back against his chest, seeking the comfort he so willingly offered. "Thank you."
He placed a kiss to the side of my neck. "Anytime, Lucky. I'ma take Lilly an Trouble wit' me for a bit."
"Okay. Be safe." I told him as I turned my head to press a kiss to his soft lips.
"Always." He grunted as he stepped away from me to pick up our girl from her baby prison. "Come on, sunshine. Trouble." He called as he left the greenhouse. Trouble gave a grunt but followed after her daddy and sister. I was really surprised at how well Trouble took to Lilly invading her personal space but she just took it all in stride and made it her mission to be Lilly's shadow.
When I was finished getting my winter crops planted I headed for the rot cellar to take a look at the stock down there with the knowledge that our last summer harvests weren't long in the future. We were also planning a huge feast to celebrate 'Thanksgiving' for the first time since the world went bad. That was just three weeks away so Lindsey and Karen were busy teaching the children all about origins of Thanksgiving.
There was a lot going on around the farm these days as we were in the middle of expanding the living quarters of the wall spaces. With babies being born left and right our living space was dwindling slowly. It had been a huge discussion amongst the wall residents on whether to expand up or out since coming inward wasn't an option at all due to garden and animal space. William and Lindsey said that if we added to the top then it would only be in sections due to the green spaces between each set of rooms. Nobody liked the idea of not having a solid wall all the way around so it was a group decision to add another round of rooms to the outside of the current walls. Again, we would go a few feet taller than the current walls in an attempt to hide the fact that people lived inside the walls. With the decision to add another round of rooms made the process of clearing the land and cutting the lumber began. That is where Daryl spent most of his days. Either at the saw mill or outside the gates cutting and hauling the trees back in.
As I come up from the root cellar I spotted Daryl talking to Rick and Abraham with Lilly resting comfortably on his hip and Trouble laying in the grass at his feet. Lilly had her fingers playing with the feathers on the end of Daryl's arrows while her daddy talked to her uncles. Trouble was the first to spot me. I couldn't help but smile as her ears stood up straight and she turned her head in my direction as I slowly made my way to them. My breasts ached which told me it was lunch time for our sunshine. Trouble must have whined because I suddenly had an audience as I finished the last ten yards or so that stood between me and them. "I was just about ta come get ya." Daryl told me when I was within hearing distance. "She's whinin'."
I nodded. "It's time for her to eat." I explained as I pulled my sweet girl from her Daddy's side into my own arms. "Hello, my sunshine. Did you have fun with Daddy?" I asked my sweet baby as I brushed her light brown hair back from her face.
She smiled up at me as she tugged at my t-shirt with a whimper. I grinned down at her before turning to face the three men in front of me. "Sorry boys, gotta take the princess to feed her. You guys can have her back in a little bit."
They all chuckled but nodded in understanding as us three girls took off for the front porch where my nursing sheet was laying on the swing.
Instead of the original every two-hour feedings our girl demanded when she was first born we were now spaced out to about every four hours. At nighttime she would sleep almost to dawn if I fed her right before putting her down for the night. Instead of my days starting at sunrise they now started a little later when the little princess woke up from her early morning nap. I spent those few hours journaling, catching up on the garden books, having sexy time with the hubby, or reading a book. It was strange at first to spend my early morning relaxing but now I enjoyed the time while my little one slept on soundly. Occasionally I would get a few more hours of sleep right along with her but not every day because I had gotten into the habit of rising with the sun since taking over the gardens.
The gardens were another thing that had changed since I had been put on bed rest while pregnant, I now had less of a problem accepting help from people. Mika, Emily, and Baylee could usually be found in the gardens with me most days. It was nice to put some of the burden off on other people though everybody told me I was still super anal about everything pertaining to the gardens. I just simply told them that it was my anal tendencies that allowed them to eat good all year long. That usually shut them up fairly quickly.
As I settled onto the porch swing with my sweet sunshine watching me eagerly drape the nursing sheet over my shoulder I began to hum a tune to help her settle into her feeding. I had taken to singing a song to her whenever she was nursing, I'm not sure if it helped or not but it was something I enjoyed doing with her. I launched into Trace Adkins song "Every Light in the House" as my sunshine latched on and began suckling.
I told you I'd leave a light on
In case you ever wanted to come back home
You smiled and said you appreciate the gesture
I took your every word to heart
'Cause I can't stand us being apart
And just to show how much I really miss ya
Every light in the house is on
The backyard's bright as the crack of dawn
The front walk looks like runway lights
It's kinda like noon in the dead of night
Every light in the house is on
Just in case you ever do get tired of being gone
Every light in the house is on
The song seemed fitting since we had six people out on a scavenging mission currently. Jesus, Kayden, T-Dogg, Zeke, Alexa, and Tara had left nine days ago to head south towards Haralson and all the other teeny tiny towns in that direction to see what they could scrape up and to clear the town see if they could find any new survivors. They were only supposed to be gone for five days maximum so our entire farm was concerned but we were holding out hope for a few more days before sending out another search party for them.
If I should ever start forgetting
I'll turn the lights off one by one
So you can see that I agree it's over
But until then I want you to know
If you look south, you'll see a glow
That's me waiting at home each night to hold ya
Every light in the house is on
The backyard's bright as the crack of dawn
The front walk looks like runway lights
It's kinda like noon in the dead of night
Every light in the house is on
Just in case you ever do get tired of being gone
Oh every light in the house is on
The backyard's bright as the crack of dawn
The front walk looks like runway lights
It's kinda like noon in the dead of night
Every light in the house is on
Just in case you ever do get tired of being gone
Every light in the house is on
As I ended the song I felt my sunshine slack off a little but I knew she wasn't finished, she was just being lazy. "Wake up, little girl, and finish your lunch." I told her as I jiggled her around as I switched her to the other breast so it would stop aching too. I never in my wildest dreams thought that I would enjoy the torture of breastfeeding but now I couldn't imagine not having this precious time with my baby girl. I pumped into a bottle also so that Daryl could have that special bonding time with her also. He normally gave her a bottle just before our bath time routine started up in the late evenings. "Lucky." Daryl whispered as he sat on the swing next to me where I fed our daughter.
I quickly rearranged me and Lilly so that I was resting my back against Daryl's side with our girl stretched out across my stomach as she nursed. "I missed you this morning." I whispered to him as I nestled my head into his shoulder.
He ran his fingers through my long blonde hair before pressing a kiss to the top of my head. "Missed ya too."
Daryl set the swing to swaying in a gentle motion while our little Lilly rested against my stomach. As we settled into the motion of the swing the sounds of the farm became our music. This is not the life I ever pictured for myself or the world I expected my children or niece and nephews to grow up in but I would have to say that we had faired quite well in the new world. Was our place in the world secure? Absolutely not and we all knew that but we also all chose to live our lives as normally as possible while we could. Everybody on this farm and in the other communities worked hard everyday to make our lives safe and simply possible. "Love you." I whispered as I felt Lilly fully relax onto my stomach with a heavy sigh.
"Love ya too, Lucky."
