"Jesus, Spike, how hard did you hit him?"
"I'm sorry, Angel! I had to knock him out. He was gonna dust me! There's something wrong with him. He was talking out of his head."
Connor listened to the whispered argument for several seconds as he came to. He expected to find his hands tied, but they weren't. He barely opened his eyes to survey his surroundings. He appeared to be laid out on the couch in Angel's office at the Hyperion. So, his father had decided to kill him after all.
"He's stirring," the blond one murmured. He was apparently named Spike. What a stupid name.
"Hey, pal. Don't move too much," Angel said gently as he practically tripped over his own feet to get to the couch. "You took a pretty hard knock on the head."
"I said I was sorry!" Spike hissed from the doorway.
Angel reached a hand toward Connor's face, but he pulled back warily.
"What... What's going on, Connor?" Angel asked, settling for a hand on his shoulder since Connor wouldn't let him touch his head.
"Don't touch me," Connor said dully. "Just kill me if you're going to."
"What the?" Angel asked. "I'm not going to kill you! Connor, something has happened to you. What's the last thing you remember?"
"Who was that girl you took back to your place last night?" Spike interrupted. "Do you know where she lives? What's her name?"
"He took a girl home?" Angel asked, frowning in Spike's direction.
"Look, I'm not his keeper, okay?" Spike said hotly. "He's a grown man and can make his own decisions."
"Obviously not," Angel muttered, peering closely at the side of Connor's head where Spike had hit him. "Get him an ice pack."
Connor was really confused, so he just lay quietly and let Angel fuss over him, even though his muscles screamed at him to flee by any means possible.
"Who is this girl who went home with you?" Angel asked once Spike had left the room.
"I don't know what he's talking about," Connor said quietly. "I don't know anything about any girl."
"What's the last thing you remember, then?" Angel asked again.
"You telling me to get out of your house," Connor answered after a moment.
"Connor, that... Are you sure that's the last thing you remember?" Angel asked with alarm.
Connor didn't reply. He just peered at the vampire uncertainly before turning his head over the arm of the couch and vomiting involuntarily into the floor.
"Hang on, pal, I'll get you some water," Angel said over his shoulder as he disappeared into the kitchen. He was back before Connor could even consider trying to leave.
"Sorry," Connor mumbled, staring with disgust at the mess he'd just made. "I didn't mean to."
"It's fine," Angel said, not even giving the scene a second glance. "Here, drink up."
Connor smelled the water tentatively just in case this was all an elaborate ruse and Angel was trying to poison him. He determined that it was okay enough and downed it in one gulp just as Spike returned with a makeshift ice pack.
"Sorry 'bout the thumping, Junior," he said as he offered it to him. "You left me no choice."
"Does it have a soul, too?" Connor asked of Angel, nodding at Spike.
"It?" Spike asked disdainfully. "It? I don't like this one, Angel! You get me the other one back right now!"
"Be quiet and let me think," Angel said, crouching down in front of Connor and affectionately patting him on the leg.
"Why are you being nice to me?" Connor asked.
"I'm always nice to you," Angel answered. "Even when you think I'm not."
Connor didn't know what to make of that reply, so he fell silent and just watched the two vampires watch him.
"Maybe he should lie down for a bit," Spike suggested after a few moments. "Maybe he'll wake up and be good as new."
"You just knocked him out and he didn't," Angel pointed out.
"I'll just go," Connor said, attempting to get to his feet.
Angel and Spike both laughed. Connor scowled.
"You're not going anywhere, little man," Angel said firmly. "Unless you wanna go lie down on my bed."
"I don't want anything from you," Connor said, his voice low and angry. "Get out of my way and let me leave!"
"You'd better drop the attitude, Connor," Angel warned, raising his eyebrows. "Don't think for a second that I won't bust your butt just because you don't remember that I can."
That comment perplexed Connor even more, so he decided to just ignore it.
"You told me to get out. Why won't you let me?" he asked.
"Connor... A lot's happened since then," Angel offered. "It's... Will you listen to me? Will you let me tell you some things? Without trying to attack anyone in the immediate area while I tell them?"
"No," Connor replied hatefully. "You killed my father. Nothing you can say will change that."
"You'd be surprised," Angel murmured, and then unexpectedly scooped Connor right off the couch and into his arms.
"What are you doing? Put me down!" Connor demanded, thrashing wildly. "Don't touch me! Put me down!"
"We're gonna go upstairs," Angel said calmly, ignoring the struggling. "And you're gonna lie down and listen for awhile."
"No!" Connor yelled. "I won't!"
He could have sworn that Angel rolled his eyes at that.
"Spike," Angel said, reaching his arm around and putting a hand over Connor's mouth to muffle his yelling.
"Yeah?" Spike asked, looking uncomfortable.
"Go back to Connor's and get some of his things. Phone, clothes..." He looked at the boy in his arms. "Shoes. God, you didn't even bring his shoes!"
"I told you he was trying to kill me," Spike said, enunciating slowly and dramatically. "Sorry if I didn't think to pack an overnight bag."
"Bring his backpack, too, if you see it," Angel instructed.
"What for?" Spike asked incredulously. "Does he look like he's gonna be up for some calculus any time soon?"
"Just do it," Angel said tiredly. "Maybe seeing some of his stuff will help him remember."
"Right," Spike said. "Can I take your car?"
"Yeah, of course," Angel said without hesitation, and Connor felt a pang of jealousy that he didn't quite understand.
As soon as Spike was out the door, Angel turned all his attention to Connor.
"Now," he began. "If I take my hand off your mouth, are you gonna be quiet?"
Connor narrowed his eyes into hateful slits and just glared at the vampire.
"Good," Angel said, removing his hand and readjusting Connor in his arms. "Up we go, then."
"I can walk, you know," Connor muttered.
"Tough," Angel answered, carrying him straight to his room and depositing him on the bed.
"I don't want to sit here," Connor argued. "It smells like vampire."
"Tough," Angel answered again.
"I hate you!" Connor yelled, which finally elicited a better response from Angel—he looked hurt.
"I know you think you do right now, Connor," he said gently. "But you don't. Not normally. Now shut up and listen to me for a minute."
Angel pulled up a chair next to the bed, making Connor groan. If he intended to sit, it was probably going to be a long, one-sided conversation. Connor listened—not intently, but he listened—for thirty minutes or more while Angel told him all sorts of lies. Lies like, "I didn't kill Holtz; he killed himself" and "You and I are sort of friends now" and "You're under a spell or something making you forget a whole bunch of stuff."
"Father wouldn't have done that to me," Connor insisted quietly when Angel paused.
"He did," Angel said sadly. "I'm sorry, but he did."
"Why should I believe you?" Connor spat. "You're nothing but a demon."
"Connor, a lot of time has passed," Angel said. "Look at me. Do I look like I just got back from a deep sea adventure?"
Connor had to admit that his father did look remarkably well for someone who'd been pulled from the ocean just hours before, but that didn't mean anything. Vampires healed quickly. He'd probably eaten someone to accelerate the process.
"Where are Fred and Gunn?" he asked suddenly. "I want to talk to Fred and Gunn."
They were probably still incredibly angry with him, but at least they were human.
"Well..." Angel said, trailing off. "You can talk to Gunn, but Fred's... not here right now."
"What did you do with her?" he demanded angrily. "Did you eat her? Is that how you got well so fast?"
"What?" Angel exclaimed, looking like he wanted to slap him. "No! Of course I didn't eat Fred. When have I ever eaten one of our friends?"
"Did you find Cordelia?" Connor asked.
"No," Angel said after an awkwardly long pause.
"Well, I didn't do anything to her!" Connor shouted. "I swear I didn't, and I don't care if you don't believe me."
"I know you didn't, buddy," Angel said, patting him on the shoulder. "Just... hush."
Connor was about to argue that he didn't want to hush, and that he didn't want to be here, and that Angel had already thrown him out, so why couldn't he leave... But Spike returned with armloads of stuff—his stuff, apparently—and he watched the two vampires with interest.
"Give me his phone," Angel directed. "I'm gonna go through his contacts. See if we can figure out who this girl is he took home."
"That's mine!" Connor protested, even though he didn't recognize the shiny blue cell phone. "You can't just go through my things!"
"Watch me," Angel said brusquely.
"Here, put your shoes on," Spike said, tossing him some tennis shoes.
Connor was going to argue with that, too, but then he realized that getting away would be a lot easier if he had shoes on, so he complied.
"God, how do you even... What's this button do? Why won't it come on?" Angel asked, holding the phone in a way that even Connor could tell was upside down.
"It's touchscreen, Angel, for heaven's sake," Spike said, snatching it away from him. "I'll do it."
"Give me that," Connor tried again.
"No," Angel said firmly, then turned his attention back to Spike. "This girl, what do you remember about her?"
"Um..." Spike said, scrolling through Connor's contacts. "Thin. Blond. Kinda nervous acting. Think it might have been the same girl he went out with awhile back."
"When he was grounded?" Angel asked, and Spike nodded.
Well, that was just ridiculous. When had Connor ever been grounded? Gunn had explained to him what it meant and even threatened to do it several times, but he'd never followed through, because he knew he couldn't enforce it. Besides, didn't he live in that apartment he'd woken up in? That's what they kept telling him. How could anyone make him stay in his room at his own home?
"Connor," Spike said. "Name some female names. The first ones that come to mind."
"No," Connor said petulantly.
"No?" Spike asked, looking at Angel like it was his fault that Connor wouldn't do it.
"That's right. No," Connor said smugly.
"Connor, please just do it," Angel practically begged.
"Fine," Connor said, huffing. "Cordelia. Fred. Buffy. Dawn. Sunny. Who's Dawn?"
"Somehow I don't think it was any of them," Spike said, ignoring the question and continuing to look at Connor's phone. "I'm gonna go through his pictures. See if there's anything there."
"It takes pictures?" Angel asked in awe.
"Seriously, mate?" Spike asked skeptically. "Get with the program here."
"I want to see the pictures," Angel said, reaching for the phone.
"Hold it," Spike said, pulling it away. "There might be some things on here that a boy wouldn't want his father seeing, you know... Oh yes, definitely things on here like that!"
Spike chuckled and gave Connor a conspiratorial smile that he didn't return. Connor had no idea what he was talking about.
"I'm just gonna delete this one all together," Spike murmured to himself. "Oh yeah, and that one's got to go... Whoa! I'm not sure that was even legal..."
"I want to see," Connor insisted, interested in spite of himself.
"All right," Spike said easily, joining him on the bed and handing him the phone.
"What am I doing in this one?" Connor asked, holding it up for Spike to see.
"Er... Well," Spike said, glancing warily toward Angel. "We were at a party in that one. I believe that's what's known as a body shot."
"Cool," Connor said, smiling slightly.
"Not cool!" Angel argued. "Not cool at all! What kind of party did you take him to, Spike?"
"A fun one," Spike said simply.
"Why do you have on that hat?" Connor asked, showing Spike another picture. "And where's your shirt?"
"Just never you mind," Spike said, taking the phone away from him. He scrolled through the rest of the pictures and shook his head. "She's not in here, mate."
"Connor, do you want something to eat?" Angel asked, and Connor got the feeling he was trying to somehow use that to have a private conversation with Spike. "I'll go down and get you something."
"I want cookies," he blurted out on impulse.
"Cookies?" Angel repeated, a faint smile on his lips. "Are you sure?"
"Those chocolate ones. With the cream in them."
"Well, I don't know if we have any of those..." Angel said apologetically.
"Figures," Connor muttered, crossing his arms over his chest. "We never have anything here but blood and tomatoes. This place sucks."
"Wow," Spike commented lightly. "Someone needs to be smacked and sent to bed."
Connor gave him one of his finest sneers.
"C'mon, Spike, let's go see about those … cookies," Angel said, and Connor couldn't tell if he'd said the word with distaste or amusement. "We'll bring you something back in a minute, okay, Con?"
"Whatever," Connor replied, rolling his eyes.
As soon as the sound of their footsteps faded, Connor scrambled off of Angel's bed and dashed for the window. He hesitated for a moment with his hand on the curtain. Did he really want to leave? Angel, demon or not, had made a pretty convincing argument that maybe things weren't quite right. And he didn't seem to be too upset about the whole ocean thing anymore, either. The blond vampire was kinda cool, and he seemed to genuinely like him—which was more than anyone else around here ever did.
Connor shook his head to clear out the evil thoughts. Father would be ashamed of him for even entertaining them. Worrying about whether a vampire likes him or not—Jesus! He'd lost his ever-loving mind, and he needed to get out of here fast before they could pollute his thoughts with any more garbage. He swung his leg out over the windowsill and landed swiftly on his feet on the sidewalk a few seconds later. He didn't know where he was going, but he had to get there fast.
