Sorry for the late update. I am really busy with my Hunger Games Parody (which you can still check out on my profile) but here you guys go! If 40 or so of you wonderful people review, we get to 900. Only 1,000 from the goal, then I can finally tell you why I'm doing this! Please review and enjoy!
Oh, ages ago, I got a review, asking me if I could make a 'Harry Potter' parody? Answer: I can, and I have some of the best ideas I've had in writing, BUT it would be the biggest project I've ever undertaken. I have spoofs for EVERY PAGE! I'll only start it when all other stories are done. Sorry.
Also, to all those who had Hurricane Sandy their way, I can't connect, as I was miles away on a rock called England, but I hope it's all good now, and if it's not, I hope you can maybe laugh a bit at this. Sorry for the late whatever this is, but… yeah.
Annabeth smiled as Percy crawled up the bed towards her.
"We shouldn't," Annabeth muttered as Percy looked down at her.
"But I want to," he replied, moving his lips to her ear.
"Percy," Annabeth sighed as fire started to spread-
Percy made his way towards Annabeth's room, making to wake her up.
"Anna-," he stopped, his hand about to knock before he heard it.
"Percy, oh Gods, yes," Annabeth's voice came from the other side.
Percy blinked stupidly. "Yes, well, bre-"
"Harder, please, just- louder!"
Percy frowned. "Okay… Breakfast is ready!"
"Be a man and take me!"
Percy got the feeling they weren't talking about breakfast anymore.
"Annabeth! Are you all right?"
He heard a scream, and didn't waste time. He leapt at the door, throwing his shoulder against it with all his force.
He bounced off it and slammed into the wall, crumpling into a heap on the floor.
"Oww," he muttered, holding his back.
"Hello?" Annabeth's voice came out, awake now.
Tyson walked past at the wrong time. He saw Percy on the floor and Annabeth's voice on the other side of the door. He grinned, piecing it together.
"It's not what you think!" Percy started.
Tyson continued to grin. "Did you just get slammed?!"
"What's that," Percy asked, getting to his feet.
"It's where you try to get into a girls bedroom to wank and she sees you and you get kicked out."
Percy moved up to him. "That didn't happen you little shit."
Tyson held up his hands. "Whatever Wanklord!"
Percy threw Retard in pen form as Tyson ran off.
"Yeah, well if I'm Wanklord, you're my little brother! Get it! You're small!"
"Percy?"
"Shit," Percy moved away from the door.
"Percy, is that you?"
"No."
"Percy, I can hear you."
"Yes."
"How long have you been out there?"
Percy brushed his hair back with stress. "Depends on how long you've been listening."
"I… erm, I just started to hear when you said 'shit'."
Percy nodded. "I only started hearing at 'Percy'."
"Who slammed at my door?"
"I tripped," Percy said lamely.
"Tripped," Annabeth repeated sceptically.
"Yeah, that's right. Anyway, breakfast is ready, so, bye."
Percy started walking quickly along the corridor, wanting to forget the whole sordid affair.
He walked into the dining area, where Tyson was talking to a couple of monsters. He laughed as Percy came round the corner.
"Look, it's the guy who got slammed!"
After Percy had noogied Tyson into insanity, he sat down with Luke.
"Morning," Luke greeted, looking at an Olympus Weekly.
Percy grunted, throwing down his bowl.
Luke dropped his paper and leant forward. "Percy, I wanted a word."
"Terrible. There you go," Percy muttered, focusing on his cereal.
Luke frowned. "I heard you were 'slammed'."
Percy threw down his spoon. "It's didn't happen like that!"
"How did it happen?"
Percy shook his head. "This is fucking ridiculous."
"Don't swear, there are kids present," he pointed at a monster family on holiday, where their baby whining at his chocolate-less food.
"Sorry."
"It's okay, they're cunts anyway."
"Luke-"
"Annabeth would let you in if you asked."
Percy frowned. "What are you talking about?"
Luke smiled, leaning back. "By Hades, you don't know. Shut up!"
"Pardon?"
"Kronos," he pointed at his ear.
"Yeah-"
"Mind if I join you," Annabeth asked, holding a tray.
Percy sprung up. "Yeah, sure, whenever. You look nice today," Percy commented, before sitting back down, flushing.
Annabeth sat next to him, looking at him.
He looked at her slowly. "What?" he asked aggressively.
"Thank you," Annabeth told him.
Luke leant in. "Right ladies, Percy's got a big day of training ahead, so finish up."
"I feel like I've been on this ship for years," Percy commented.
Annabeth thought about it. "Must be three chapters now. When are we going to reach Grover?"
Luke shrugged. "Grover? No idea. Sea of Monsters? Next chapter."
"You're sure?"
Luke nodded. "The author decided it ages ago. But then our funding got cut, because he decided to write a 'Hunger Games' parody. God knows what will happen if he writes that 'Harry Potter' one he's been planning for ages."
"No," Annabeth used her spoon to force her point. "He said he'd only do that once he's finished us."
"Sure he said the same about HG too," Percy muttered darkly.
Tyson came running up, pointing at the door to the main deck.
"Guys, you need to see this."
"Nah," Percy decided.
Tyson glared at him, but Annabeth beat him to the punch.
"Percy, you'll ruin the story!"
Percy pushed himself up. "Fine, fine.
They all made their way up to the top deck, looking around absently.
"Overboard," a monster shouted.
Percy and the rest went to the edge and looked over. A green mermaid was there, brandishing his trident at Percy.
"Who are you?" Percy called.
The mermaid scowled. "I'm Triton-"
"What?" Percy called.
"I'm Triton!"
"I can't hear you!"
"I'M TRITON!"
Percy laughed. "Nah, I heard you the first time. What do you want?"
"I've come here to declare battle with you!"
"Who are you?"
"Triton!"
Percy waved a hand. "Yes, we got that. Anything else?"
"I'm a son of Poseidon!"
Percy sat up. "Wait, we're-"
"We're?"
"Yeah, we're, i.e Tyson and I, are sons of Poseidon and Sally Jackson. Have you heard of them?"
"Well, I'm Poseidon's heir."
"How?" Percy frowned.
Triton looked smug. "I was born first."
Percy shook his head. "No, I mean, how can you be his heir? He's never going to die, is he?"
"Well, no," Triton admitted.
"It's just an empty title, really," Percy observed.
Triton nodded. "A bit, but it's the fact that I'm heir and you're not!"
Tyson came up, looking at Triton. "Hey green dude," he turned to Percy. "Message from Dad." He held up said message.
Percy took it, gesturing for Triton to wait. He read the letter and looked at Triton sadly.
"Sorry."
"Why?" Triton smiled.
"Dad just mentioned he might make me heir."
Triton scowled. "No way!"
Percy dropped the postcard to him. "Way."
Triton looked at the postcard. "That's from Mum and Dad's honeymoon," Tyson added.
"Honeymoon?" Triton asked.
Percy frowned. "Yeah, Mum and Dad got married when I was 12. Why, didn't you know?"
Triton gaped.
"We would have invited you," Tyson added.
"But we didn't know you existed," Percy continued.
Triton dropped the card. "But- but- but-"
"That makes your claim as heir invalid," Annabeth piped in. She put her hands on Percy's shoulders. "Perseus is the true heir to the sea."
Percy shifted uncomfortably. "Annabeth," he muttered. "He already lost his Dad, don't make it worse."
"Sorry," Annabeth said, but she wasn't. As Percy explained about his Mum and the wedding, Gabe, all that, she looked at him; he was funny, smart when he wasn't being dumb, sweet, hot to the max and now he was Prince of the Sea. If she pulled Percy she was going to be one lucky girl…
Triton shouted, bringing her back.
"Fuck you mortal-"
"Not mortal," Annabeth corrected out of habit. "He's half-God-"
"Whereas you're half fish," Tyson put in.
Triton was going purple. "Face me Jackson! I'll kill you!" He was frothing now.
Luke slapped the rail, looking serious. "Looks like you'll have to take him out!"
Percy shook his head. "No, that's stupid."
Annabeth moved in. "You really should."
Percy looked at all their faces, and sighed. "Fine."
"You should probably take off your shirt too," Annabeth said awkwardly. "Just so it doesn't get wet."
"My clothes don't get wet," Percy reminded her.
"You should," Tyson piped in unexpectedly, looking at Annabeth.
Percy frowned. "Are you serious?"
Tyson scoffed. "Just because you're ashamed of your big fat body, chubbers."
Percy scowled. "Fine."
He made his way up to the rail, ripping off his shirt and stepped onto it, looking down at the sea.
Annabeth drank in Percy's torso; wiry and thin, the chubbiness having gone, and looked at the very sparse hairs dotting his chest. She wanted to touch them… but would she be allowed? She was just coming to this conclusion when Percy raised his arms and dove perfectly off the ship, looking more like a creature of the sea as he hit the water.
Percy cut deep into the waves, looking around him for Triton. Even with his underwater vision, he couldn't pick him up.
He spread his mind out, feeling various heat signatures, before alighting upon-
He was slammed into and went spiralling away, looking to see Triton raising his trident.
Percy compressed the water as he charged and Triton hit it face on, bouncing off and dropping his trident. Percy shot towards hit slamming into him, before 180ing and raising his hands, forming manacles out of the sea, which encased Triton's arms and legs.
"Wow, you're really lame," Percy muttered. It came out as 'Woht,tufjfofjgoirojod' in the water.
Triton screamed. "Free meeeeee!"
Percy shrugged. "Go back to the Little Mermaid." It sounded like: "Littfhfodd mdmfjmdnfehd'
Triton fought. "I'm invincible! You haven't beaten me!"
Percy pointed at him. "Look you silly sod, you're all tied up!"
"You're a communist! You would say that!"
Percy frowned. "What?"
"I've never been beatennnnnn!"
"You have this time!"
"Fight on you yellow bellied shit!"
Percy started swimming up, reaching the surface and using the sea to bring him back up to the boat.
Annabeth ran to the rail as Percy jumped over onto deck.
"What did you do?"
Percy waved a hand, putting back on his button shirt (they still hadn't given him new clothes) and rolling up the sleeves.
"Couple of water compressions, jet propellnations, standard underwater melee. Honestly," Percy adjusted his collar, "I thought he'd be harder. He's just a whiny little Mermaid."
Tyson came up. "Can you teach me to do that stuff?"
"Sure kid," Percy answered, looking down at him.
"Score!"
Luke came up. "Good work all. Now, let's wrap up this plot point and get this ship out to see Skipper. We have a story to stick to!"
Right, hope you liked that and please review and get this story up to 900! reviews! Wow, we're so nearly there!
