O-o-o-o-O

The light coming from the windows at the back of his home gave Remy powerful feelings of both relief and dread. Relief to reach home and safety after the hell he had just gone through; and dread of what he would face once he entered that door and what he had to tell his family. Jacking the first car he could find that wouldn't give him too much trouble, he had shoved down the panic inside and made himself drive in what he hoped was a reasonable fashion back home. The last thing he needed was to get pulled over now.

He knew he should stop and find a phone. With that fire (explosion.....screams.....Etienne's head smashed against the hull of the ship...) raging at the dock, the police would be there in no time. But they would be busy assisting the fire department and interviewing witnesses; Remy doubted that they would be taking the time to investigate the cargo of the ship docked there, and the Pig would have time to escape, and possibly take his 'merchandise' with him. Remy should be at the first phone he could find, calling the cops to tell them about what was on that ship. But Etienne was laying under a pile of leaves and refuse beneath a tree (cold, wet skin......glassy eyes staring at nothing...). Hopefully he could make the call in time once he got home, but first he had to get home because he couldn't leave his cousin alone there in the dark.

Remy stopped beneath one of the trees in his back yard to catch his breath. Not wanting to leave a trail leading to his home, he had parked the stolen car about a mile away from the house and had gone on foot the rest of the way, making his way as quickly as possible through the back yards and gardens of his neighbors; places he and his brother and cousins had crept through their entire lives. Finally he stepped away from the tree, and steeling himself for what would happen next but still not knowing what he was going to say, he walked quickly to the back door. He barely had his hand on the knob though when it turned and opened on its own. Remy looked up to see Henri, worry written all over his face.

"Get in here." His brother commanded, grabbing Remy's hand and dragging him into the house. Behind him were the rest of the family; even Tante Mattie, which was surprising as she usually paid little attention to the actual workings of the family business. All of them looked as concerned as Henri.

"What happened?" Henri continued once Remy was inside. "We've been listening on the police scanner; they mentioned an explosion at the docks....."

"Where's Etienne?" Theoren demanded, grabbing Remy's other arm. Remy froze and looked at his cousin, frantically trying to come up with words.

"Etie..." the word came out as a croak, and Remy swallowed before trying to speak again.

"Etienne......the ship......he fell.........wasn't breathing...." Remy stumbled over his words, looking frantically around the room for something to focus on, to help him think straight. Finally he found his father.

"That bastard. Did you know what he had? Did you know who we were working for?" he asked, grief and outrage helping him solidify his thoughts.

Jean-Luc opened his mouth but Theoren refused to be ignored.

"WHERE. IS. MY. BROTHER?!" He exclaimed, shaking Remy for emphasis. Remy tried to get away from his cousin, but the other man's grip was too strong.

"They said on the scanner that there was a body found aways down from the dock, beneath a tree. Was that him?" Henri asked grimly.

Remy nodded, relieved to be distracted from Theoren, even if momentarily. "He was too heavy, I couldn't get him away without us both being caught, so I left him th....."

"You left him? You left my brother there while you RAN?" Theoren growled, and Remy's jaw exploded in pain as his cousin punched him. He turned his head away, clutching at his face, and he could hear Henri and Emil argue with Theoren, pulling him away.

"He's probably at the county morgue by now." Henri said once they'd gotten Theoren under control. Remy couldn't look at them. He'd completely failed. He was supposed to help keep Etienne safe, but first he'd let his cousin die, then he'd abandoned him and now the boy's body was sitting in the morgue when he should be home safe with his family.

"What happened?" Jean-Luc spoke up at last, the tone of his voice allowing no refusal.

Remy swallowed and told them everything; about getting caught, the Pig and his cargo, what the man had said about the Guild's client and the mole he'd had in the organization, their escape attempt and the gun that had exploded too close to them, causing Etienne to be smashed against the ship.

"Did you know, Papa?" he asked when he was finished telling his story, finally able to look up at his father.

Jean-Luc nodded. "I knew. Our client was going to use the info to find where the Pig was taking his cargo, and to track down his buyers."

This info was met with surprise from around the room.

"Why didn't you tell us, and why would you work for the Feds?" Remy demanded.

"For one thing, it's none of your business; you take the assignments that you are given. You were supposed to just get the information and get out." Jean-Luc said. "But in this case, I will tell you that I owed the head Customs agent a favor. And it was for a good cause; some things just cannot be tolerated."

He looked around at his family. "Henri, I want you and Emil to go down to the morgue and retrieve Etienne's body."

Theoren looked at his uncle angrily. "That's my brother, I should go with them."

Jean-Luc shook his head sternly. "No. You're too upset, I won't have you possibly making a mistake. You need to go home to your parents; they're going to need you right now more than we do."

Theoren swallowed visibly, then nodded. His hands shook as he turned to Remy.

"This is your fault." He said quietly, and the hatred in his eyes hurt Remy more than he thought possible. He looked like he was going to say something more, but then Tante Mattie took his arm and hugged him, whispering quietly in his ear. Theoren nodded, and they left the room together.

Remy watched them go. "What about me, Papa?" he asked finally. "I need to call the police, that bastard is going to get away......"

"It's okay Remy." Jean-Luc interrupted. "I called them the minute the report about the explosion came over the scanner. I also called my client. He can use the investigation of the explosion to find what he needs to use against the Pig. Now what happened to your hand?" he asked, and Remy looked down at his right hand, which was covered in angry red splotches from where he had been holding the charged gun.

"The gun.....I held it so long it burned me......." he said a little absentmindedly, as he hadn't really thought about it since entering the house. "I'm sorry.......I tried to throw it as far as I could, but I held it too long, it was too powerful......" Remy said, going back over what had happened in his head again and again, trying to think of some way it could have gone differently. If only he had just thrown it farther.......

"It's not your fault Remy." Jean-Luc said, and Remy wanted to believe his father, but ultimately it was his fault, he had been responsible for watching over Etienne, and he had failed. He just stared down at his hand, not wanting to look at his family and see the disappointment that just had to be in their eyes.

"He's right, petit frere." Henri said, calling him a name he hadn't used in years. "You couldn't know what would happen."

Still not looking at him, Remy heard his brother step away from him.

"Come on." Henri said to Emil. "Let's go get our cousin."

"Oui." Emil said quietly, the seriousness of the occasion apparently having curbed his smart tongue. Remy didn't envy him; the thought of having to break into a morgue was enough to give any man the creeps. But to have to do it to get your own cousin........he fought back a shudder.

The two young men left the room, leaving Remy with his father and sister in law.

"Come on Remy." Mercy said quietly. "Let's take care of that hand."

Remy ignored her though, and looked at his father. "Where will they take him?"

Jean-Luc glanced at the clock. "It's still early, but I'll call Marius. He has people who can help."

Remy thought grimly that perhaps for once it was good to have connections to people who dealt in death. Any normal funeral home would ask too many questions about a case like this.

Mercy took his arm. "Remy, let's go." she said more firmly this time. He relented, and let her take him from the room, leaving his father to make his phone calls.

O-o-o-o-O

Henri and Emil returned just before dawn, looking tired and numb. Remy was in the kitchen when they came in, nursing a cup of coffee that had long grown cold. Jean-Luc was in the library while Mercy had gone to her room, no one being able to go to sleep but at the same time not wanting to be in anyone else's company while they waited. Tante Mattie was at Theoren and Etienne's house, where she called to report that their mother had gone into hysterics upon receiving the news of her youngest son and had had to be sedated. Mattie said she was going to stay there for the time being to take care of the poor woman.

"How did it go?" Remy asked hesitantly when they came in.

"Fine." Henri replied quietly, dumping the dregs of the coffee pot into a mug. "Thankfully for us night shift's sloppy; they were running around like chickens because of the dock fire. Two other bodies came in besides Etienne." he said, and Remy's stomach turned; he had never taken another human life before, even indirectly. Added onto the fire of his guilt over Etienne it just made the blaze stronger. He had killed three people tonight.

"And?" Remy prompted, pushing his cup away, not being able to stand the sight of it anymore. Mercy had put one of Tante Matties salves on his burned hand so he was mostly using his left hand for now.

"Emil managed to get a hearse, though I still think an ambulance would have been better...."

"They're needed too badly for us to take one. At least I got us something to use." Emil broke in, and Remy was startled at the bitter tone in his cousin's voice. He knew he shouldn't have been surprised though, as he and Etienne had been good friends.

"Where is....he now?" Remy asked.

"Marius has a guy in his pocket that runs a funeral home." Henri said.

"Surprise, surprise." Emil muttered from where he was sitting at the end of the table.

Henri gave the younger man a dirty look. "He'll keep Etienne there until we can have services either Monday or Tuesday."

Remy sighed. Marius will have told his daughter by now. He supposed he should be concerned about what Belle will say; he already knew that Julien will have loads to say about it. He couldn't bring himself to care though. Etienne was dead, and Julien's or even Belle's thoughts on the subject really didn't matter.

"Thanks." Remy muttered. "This is all my fault" he said, burying his face in his good hand.

"Why did you wait so long to throw the damn gun?!" Emil asked in frustration.

"Because I could've blown up the warehouse otherwise. Some of those kids were in there." Remy retorted, not lifting his head. Jean-Luc's phone call earlier had done its job; it was all over the news now, what had been found on the ship and in the warehouse. The police were being hailed as heroes, and the chief Customs agent had everything he needed to go after the Pig, who unfortunately had managed to escape before the cops had arrived. The U.S. Customs office had the warrants they needed now, and the Pig wouldn't be able to show his face anywhere for quite awhile. In the meantime, the kids would be returned to their families, and the reporters on the scene were stirring up a war cry against white slavery. Remy was sure the various networks would have a field day for weeks to come doing investigations and special interest stories relating to this incident.

"But...." Emil started, but was interrupted by Henri.

"Shut up Emil. Remy didn't cause this. I don't think there was any way for this to come out clean." he said, sitting down at the table with his coffee.

Emil didn't say anything, he just stared down at the table for a moment. Finally he got up.

"I'm going to bed." he muttered, and left the kitchen without looking at either of the other two.

Henri sat at the table across from Remy, and dumped what had to be half the bowl of sugar into his cup.

"Your teeth are going to rot and fall out." Remy mumbled absentmindedly, picking on his brother's sweet tooth out of habit.

"Remy, I just went out and stole my cousin's body out of the fucking morgue. Leave me the hell alone." Henri snapped. "You have no idea....."

"No, I just had to watch him die, then drag his body out of the water." Remy replied in a wooden tone.

His brother sighed. "Sorry. Damnit.....I just can't understand how this could have happened."

"There has to have been something else I could have done differently." Remy said quietly, staring down at the table where some grains of sugar had spilled out of the bowl. He should wipe the table before going to bed; Tante always complained about ants....

"I don't see how, especially since they knew you were coming." Henri replied.

Remy just shook his head. "I killed him Henri." he said, still staring down at the table, not really seeing it; it was just somewhere to focus his gaze that wasn't his brother's face.

"Remy, stop it...."

"I was the one who charged up that gun, I was the one who didn't throw it far enough away." Remy said.

"What else were you supposed to do?" his brother asked.

"I don't KNOW!" Remy said in frustration. "There had to have been something else though; it shouldn't have come to this." He finally looked up from the table and out at the kitchen window, where the first pink of dawn was showing, just like it always did at this time of day, as if it were any other day and everything was okay. It had no right though, because this was no ordinary day and nothing would ever be okay again.

"I want a cigarette." Remy muttered at last, suddenly craving the harsh taste the tobacco would leave in his mouth and and the reek of smoke that would linger in his nostrils long after the cigarette was gone.

"You're supposed to be quitting." Henri said. "You promised Tante....."

"I don't care." Remy said defiantly. "I broke society's biggest rule tonight, one more little one isn't going to matter." He got up and took his coffee cup to the sink, dumping out the remains but not bothering to rinse it.

"Remy, I think you should...."

"You should go see your wife." Remy interrupted him. "Last I knew she was upstairs in her room crying."

With that he left the kitchen to go find his cigarettes; he was sure he still had a pack left in his trench coat. He knew he should have wiped the kitchen table before leaving, as Henri would never remember to do it, but for once he just couldn't find it in himself to care about Tante Mattie's ants.

O-o-o-o-O

It was after breakfast when Belle came to the house. Remy had sat at the table with Mercy and his father while Henri was upstairs asleep. He had picked at the pain perdu his father had made since Tante Mattie was still with Theoren's family, but couldn't really get himself to eat. The only thing he had really eaten was a banana and some grapes, but only because Mercy had forced him to. Finally he had grabbed his pack of cigarettes and retreated to the back porch, ignoring his sister in law's dirty looks. This was where his fiancee found him, stretched out on the porch swing, a lit cigarette dangling between his fingers as he rocked the swing gently with his foot.

"Remy.." Belle said quietly from the doorway. He looked over at her, not surprised to see her; he knew she would be coming eventually.

"Hey." was all he muttered before turning back to watch a squirrel that had been creeping around the back yard for the last twenty minutes.

Belle stepped out of the house onto the porch. "Can I come sit down?"

"Yeah." Remy said, and sat up to give her some room, but didn't look at her.

Belle joined him on the swing and it creaked as she sat down. "I'm so sorry Remy." she said, and wrapped her arms around him in a hug. It felt good to have someone hold him; no one had really touched him other than necessary since he came home earlier, unless one counted Theoren's fist.

"Merci." he whispered and closed his eyes, wondering why he wasn't crying. Wasn't he supposed to have been crying by now? He hadn't cried when he told his family what had happened, even though there had been tears in various peoples' eyes over the last few hours, but surely now that Belle was here he should be crying, shouldn't he? It was always how it worked out in the movies. Nothing though; his eyes were completely dry. He felt the tears though; they were tied up inside of him, caught up in a knot so tight in his heart that it hurt.

"We're taking good care of him, Remy." Belle said calmly, keeping her arms around him. "Mon pere has his best people preparing him for burial tomorrow." She kissed his cheek and Remy caught the faint scent of her perfume, flowery and sweet. It was good to have her close, a moment of peace between their arguments and a reminder of why he was marrying her.

Finally Remy drew back and Belle let go of him, taking his free hand. If she noticed that he was smoking with his burned hand she didn't mention it.

"How bad was it?" he asked, not really wanting to know but at the same time not being able to stop himself from asking.

Belle squeezed his hand gently. "The entire back of his skull was smashed in. It had to have been quick; they didn't find any water in his lungs so he was dead before he landed in the river."

Remy closed his eyes and felt queasy again, remembering how soft the back of Etienne's head had felt as he held him in the water. He tried to take comfort that the boy hadn't drowned before Remy could get to him.

"What did Marius have to say about this?" he asked before taking a drag on his cigarette.

"He's sorry; we all are." Belle said, but Remy was sure that her brother wasn't included in that statement.

"And your brother?"

Belle frowned. "I'm sure you can guess what he had to say."

"I'm sure." Remy was positive that the only thing Julien would have to say upon hearing of the death of a Thief was 'good riddance'.

"What a mess. I know this was Etienne's Tilling, his first job on his own, but it doesn't sound like it was very well put together. Didn't he notice the men were armed?" Belle asked, as calm as ever. "You should have had more backup."

Remy glared at her. How could she talk about his cousin like that right after his death? "Etienne did the best he could. It wasn't his fault that the Pig covered his tracks well and had a mole in the Customs office. Yes, he didn't notice the guns, but I did and I didn't tell him, so that was my fault. Besides, we didn't need a team; this was just a simple B&E at a shipping office. Two people should have been able to cover it."

Belle shook her head. "Maybe, but he should at least have gotten a layout of the office; that would have given him an idea of his surroundings once inside and saved him some time."

"They were waiting for us Belle...."

"Which is why he should have had more people, going into the unknown like that."

Remy grabbed his hand away from her. Etienne hadn't even been buried yet; why was she talking about this now?

"I don't see you working with backup." he said defensively.

"That's because I know what I'm doing, and I make sure I have every job fully researched before going in." Belle said.

"It was his first time in charge. There were bound to be mistakes." Remy said.

"Yes, and this resulted in you having to blast your way out of there. I'd never heard of you causing such a big explosion before, Remy." Belle said. "Not even when your power first showed up."

"I held the charge for too long. If I had just thrown it farther away, if we had run faster...." Remy said. "This was my fault, not Etienne's. He did the best he could. Didn't anyone ever tell you not to talk badly of the dead?"

A faint, cynical smile crossed Belle's lips. "Of course not, death is our business. Regardless, it doesn't sound like he was ready to pass his test."

"Doesn't the fact that we were set up mean anything to you?" Remy asked, getting annoyed with her callous attitude.

"Yes, it just means that neither of you had all of your possibilities covered."

"This was not his fault." Remy said. "It's mine. I was supposed to watch out for him, I didn't tell him about the guns, I'm the one who blew up the dock. Why aren't you blaming me for this?"

Belle leaned back into the cushion of the swing. "Because ultimately he was in charge. Isn't that how it works?"

Remy nodded. "Yes. But he was just a kid......"

"Then why was he out there? If he was as ready as you say he was, then he was fully in charge and therefore responsible if things failed. If he wasn't ready, then you shouldn't have allowed him to test. But it sounds like maybe you think he wasn't ready, so maybe you're right; maybe it is your fault." Belle mused.

Remy looked away, not needing her to confirm the guilt he already felt. "I think you need to get out of here. This isn't exactly what I'd call comforting."

Belle got up from the swing. "I am sorry he's dead, Remy." she said before kissing the top of his head.

Remy sighed, still not looking at her. "I know you are." he said quietly. "I just can't talk about this right now."

Belle was silent for a moment. "Alright." she said at last. "I'll see you tomorrow at the funeral then."

Remy just nodded, then listened as she moved away from the swing and walked back into the house. He knew she didn't mean to be cruel; she just had a different outlook on death than he had, and didn't find anything wrong with criticizing someone a mere few hours after they were killed, even to go as far as implying that it was their own fault. He couldn't do that though, especially not right now, not when his cousin was at that moment being prepared for burial. He tried not to picture that, but he had watched too many episodes of CSI with Mercy and so it was only too easily to imagine what was happening. Of course it wasn't quite the same as what the mortician did, but the idea was still the same.

Remy finished his cigarette and lit another, watching paper catch fire from the spark from his finger and curl inward, lighting the tobacco. He was sure there was something he should be doing, but he couldn't think what it was. His father had left to help Etienne's father handle funeral arrangements and Emil had gone to see Theoren, leaving just him, Henri and Mercy at the house; the latter two were cleaning in preparation for the reception that would be held after the service tomorrow. Remy hadn't offered to help and they hadn't asked. Everyone was for the most part leaving him alone, and he was glad. Each person he saw just struck home the fact of Etienne's absence. He didn't know what he'd do tomorrow, having to face everyone at the funeral.

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow was Monday, Remy realized, knowing now what he should be doing. He should be calling Rogue. He'd have to pick her up tomorrow and he didn't want to bring her home to be surprised by a house in mourning. He needed to call and tell her today what had happened, so she would at least be prepared for what she'd have to deal with tomorrow. He wouldn't try to bring her to the funeral, he would just have her stay here at the house with Martine; she could just have her studies as normal.

He should call her. It was still morning though, and Remy decided to at least let her get through breakfast before upsetting her. Besides, he wasn't quite ready to talking to someone else yet, not after his little chat with Belle.

Remy was halfway through his cigarette when Mercy opened the back door.

"Remy, you have a phone call." she said quietly, and he could see the tiredness in her eyes.

"Who is it?" he asked, wondering who would be calling him right now.

"It's Rogue."

O-o-o-o-O

*BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP *

An arm shot out from under the blanket and felt around before hitting a button on the alarm clock next to the bed. Silence graced the room once more and Rogue groaned and rolled over, annoyed with herself for forgetting that today was Sunday and setting the alarm last night by mistake. As much as she'd like to sleep in though, she still had a History paper to finish for Martine. That didn't mean she had to get up right away though.

Rogue rolled back over towards her nightstand and feeling around, found the remote control for her stereo and turned it on, switching it over from CD to radio. She'd lay in bed for awhile and listen to the radio while she decided whether she really wanted to get up or not. The news was being read when she turned it on and she listened, since she was required to keep up with current events even on the weekends. So far it was the usual. Wars, fires, deaths, the state government mutant registration law was still being debated by the Louisiana legislature, and it wasn't looking good. Rogue had a feeling that she may need to call Kurt soon. Her train of thought was soon derailed though.

"An explosion rocked the harbor district early this morning, killing three people and wounding four. When police investigated they found a ship docked at that harbor carrying small children in cages, with more hidden in a warehouse next to it. It is believed that these children were intended to be sold to wealthy buyers both in and outside of the U.S. The identities of the dead not known, but they are believed to be under the employ of the man responsible for the taking of these children, a man sometimes called The Pig. One of these bodies was later stolen from the morgue. Police have few leads at this time, but mutant involvement is suspected."

The anchorwoman continued, but Rogue was no longer listening. Etienne's Tilling was last night, and Remy had mentioned a job down at the harbor on Friday. Had it been them at that dock? Fear raced through her as she sat up in bed. Every resident's room had a phone, but Rogue rarely used hers as she preferred to call Kurt from Remy's house. She reached carefully for it now though, and dialed Remy's cell phone number, that being one of the numbers that he and Kurt made sure that she memorized, along with the LeBeau house phone and the number for the Xavier Institute. It went straight to voicemail though, and Rogue listened in annoyance.

"Bonjour, this be Remy. Leave him a message and maybe he'll call you back."

After deciding he liked the whole talking in third person business, Remy recorded his voice mail message that way. Rogue still thought it made him sound like an idiot.

"Alright schizo, I just heard a story about an explosion on the radio and that had better not have been you. If it was, you'd better be okay. Call me as soon as you get this."

Hanging up, she immediately picked up the phone again and dialed the house number. This time she got an actual person.

"Hello?" Mercy answered the phone, her voice sounding a little off.

"Hi Mercy, it's Rogue. I just heard something on the radio about an explosion at the harbor. Is Remy okay? I know he was going to be down there last night."

Mercy paused. "Remy's okay, but..."

"Oh thank god." Rogue sighed in relief. "Can I speak to him?"

"Hang on a minute. He's out back." Mercy said, and a couple of minutes later Remy came on the phone.

"Hey Rogue." he said, and his voice was strained. Something was definitely wrong.

"Remy, what happened last night? The woman on the radio said there was an explosion at the harbor, were you there? Are you okay?" Rogue asked in a rush.

"Oui chere, I'm....I'm okay." Remy said. "The job went bad last night, we got caught. We escaped but they were chasing us, I made an explosion and got away, but Etienne.......Etienne's dead."

Rogue was silent for a moment, dazed from what she had just heard.

"I'm so sorry Remy." she said at last. "Tell me everything."

"No, not right now, not over the phone." Remy said, the stress in his voice making her heart ache. "We can talk tomorrow. The services will be held then, with a reception here at the house afterwards, but you don't have to go. You can stay with Martine."

"Okay." Rogue said. She was glad to not go. She had only been to one funeral, which had been Irene's over a year ago, and while that had only been a tiny affair with just her, Carla, the priest and the state social worker in attendance, she never wanted to go to another.

"Are you sure you're okay, Remy?" she asked.

"No. But I don't have a choice. I'm sorry Rogue, but I just can't talk right now. I'll see you tomorrow." he said, and hung up the phone before she could respond. It was a little rude, and normally she'd be annoyed with him but given the circumstances she decided she could forgive him.

Poor Etienne.

She hadn't known the boy that well, but he seemed nice, even if he had a habit of listening to Emil too much sometimes. Poor Emil, he must be devastated. The whole family must be. Rogue understood, having lost family herself. And just the death itself was bad enough, but to have something like this happen, just out of the blue. She'd have to have Remy explain what had happened to her tomorrow. As much as she hated it, there was nothing she could do for now, and not wanting to think, about Remy, Etienne, or anything else, even her paper, she crawled under the covers, rolled over and went back to sleep. Maybe she'd wake up and the whole thing wouldn't have happened. One could always hope, anyway.

O-o-o-o-O

I'm so mean sometimes.

Based on a comment Ishy made, I'm imagining a lot of people are wishing to hug the Cajun right now. Maybe I should sell tickets.