LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR A

Alpha Civilian Medical Center; Women's Ward

ROOM: Alpha Estuary Gestational Laboratory

YEAR: 2315

Days had passed since the attack on the Earth Orbit System. No further acts of aggression came from the surface but the stations and their surrounding pods remained on high alert. The New Year was quickly approaching but there was a shared hesitance over celebrating its arrival. The people feared that they wouldn't live to see it and even if they did, they knew it was unlikely to bring peace.

The system ambush prompted many changes. While the inability to cross the protected barrier of Earth's atmosphere remained a military secret, rumors started to spread through the civilian population. There was heightened security, revised protocol, a heavy nervous air and most notably a drop in moral. For Katya the biggest change since the ambush had been the arrival of Sam Anders aboard Alpha Station.

When Ellen came up to Katya in the ward and announced that Tawny would be bringing Sam to Alpha Katya couldn't speak. She looked back at Ellen intending to unleash a myriad of angry protest and yet nothing came. She'd simply turned away, walking past Bill and Laura and disappearing through the curtain into Saul's ward room. She'd checked his vitals for her own reassurance and then given the sleeping man a quick kiss to the cheek before darting out again. If Ellen, Laura or the Admiral had tried to stop her she couldn't recall. She ran out of the ward and didn't stop until she'd arrived at the civilian medical center and made it to the Estuary..

When she'd entered Blaze was still there visiting. He sat with her as they waited for Alexi to be debriefed and relieved of duty. The bloodshed on C deck had been greater than they initially thought. Once the sergeant finally arrived Blaze didn't stay much longer. The couple thanked him for being there when they couldn't and after a few hugs he excused himself. When he was gone Alexi moved his chair beside Katya's and she finally broke down. It wasn't just over Sam's coming arrival, Saul's gunshot or even knowing that her husband had been involved in a near massacre. It was over all of it and so much more.

"I tried to tell them, Lex," She'd cried into her husband's shoulder as he stroked her hair. "I tried and everything just got in the way."

She had been so ready to admit everything to Saul and Ellen in ward. Then Xao showed up and the moment was gone.

"Relax, Katya. You've all been through too much today. It wasn't the right time."

She cried harder because she felt that it really had been the right time. Her loving parents had just confessed their deepest secret to her. She was ready to do the same; to share her own pain and her own hope. Then the tumultuous circumstance of life reared its head and got in the way just as it had been doing all along.

"I feel like a missed my chance, Lex. If I told them today they would have forgiven me for keeping it from them."

Katya tried to keep her voice low but it wasn't uncommon to hear muffled cries or worried voices throughout the facility. For the most part the staff allowed everyone their privacy.

"We have time, Yekaterina," Alexi had told her as she leaned over the arms of their chairs to rest her head against him. "Soon. Just not tonight. Tonight let's take a breath. Soon we'll tell them together."

The chairs in the lab were large; designed for long or overnight stays. They were comfortable and plush but not quite suited for two, though a few times Katya considered crawling onto Alexi's lap. She settled for holding his hand. Unlike most laboratories the Estuary was kept relatively warm and dim instead of frigid and bright. The surrounding machines constantly hummed around them giving off their own heat. The unique conditions of the facility made it easy for Katya and Alexi to nod off during visits, especially when they were so exhausted. They always tried their best to fight against the temptation to sleep. It was so difficult for them just to make the time to spend there. Though it gave them some measure of comfort to simply be there, they felt like napping through it was a waste.

That night Alexi had come into the lab still in full combat fatigues. Katya had come covered in dried blood and still packing heat. Though no one had denied them access she knew what a sight they were as they sat there.

"Look at us," She'd huffed at one point. Her eyes filled with more tears and she shook her head as she looked down at the dark rust-brown stains on her shirt. "We shouldn't be here like this."

"We aren't the only military couple who comes here, Katya," Alexi sighed in a weak attempt.

"No. We're just the only ones who don't have the good sense to change first," She countered in a sharp whisper. "We shouldn't have to come here with guns hanging off of us. We shouldn't be showing up with our family's blood on our hands. What the hell are we doing, Alexi? This is just another sign of how wrong this all is. We were being selfish, malysh. We made a selfish choice."

Though Alexi was often irritated by Katya's claim that their decision was a mistake he chose not to challenge her that night. They were too tired and too worn.

"Katya, sooner or later you're going to have to stop burdening yourself with all of the reasons that this shouldn't be. It already is."

She'd heard the hurt in his voice despite how much he'd tried to temper his words, but she didn't have the strength left to apologize.

It took Katya a while to calm down that night but eventually Alexi was able to soothe her and she relaxed into her seat. They were in the lab together for the first time in days. It was a rare occurrence. Over the past few weeks they had found joint visits difficult to achieve. Their schedules didn't allow for it in most cases. They usually had to split up their time and go separately. When one went they would speak to Dr. Diaz or her staff on their own and have to relay updates, information and details once they were together. They were lucky to have Tawny. She kept in steady contact with Diaz and scheduled her own visits to the lab every week. When they did managed to go together they would find themselves sacrificing sleep; heading there late in the night or early in the mornings. Katya was glad to finally be there with Alexi, especially after all they had endured that day. They'd made it through alive. They all had.

Once Katya was able to settle her nerves they caught up. They filled each other in on their accounts of the ambush in soft murmuring voices, careful not to scare the civilian staff any further. When others got too close they scanned each other's thoughts and emotions; a rare occurrence for the couple despite their shared cylon ability. Alexi tried to downplay what he'd witnessed on C deck. He couldn't tell Katya all that he'd seen, how many chromed monsters he'd evaded as they rained pellets of condensed fire and bullets upon his platoon.

Katya told Alexi about Saul's confession of Ellen's murder on New Caprica. She watched him go white as a sheet at the shocking revelation. He let her cry into his lap as she told him of the Tigh's story. Alexi was glad of his surroundings. He wasn't sure that he would have been able to keep composed had they been elsewhere. When the initial shock had worn off and Katya's sobs had subsided she filled him in on the details of Saul's injury and prognosis. She'd felt so guilty to leave the poor wounded man in the ward, but after Ellen's announcement of Sam's arrival she needed to get away and there was only one place that she wanted to be. Katya chose not to share the news of Sam's transfer with Alexi while they were in the Estuary.. She didn't want to bring it there. It wasn't the place for it. She promised herself that she would tell him after a night's rest. For one more night she was able to pretend that it wasn't really happening. For a while more they spoke in hushed tones; their words peppered with yawns, stretches and tears as they recounted the day.

"Are you sure that they actually hit each other, Kat?"

Alexi had been almost amused by his wife's account of Laura and Ellen's apparent fight, though he tried to hide it. He knew that Katya found no humor in the event. He thought he saw her turn green as she told him about the bruises on each woman's face.

"I'm sure," She'd insisted.

"Well who do you think swung first?"

"There isn't a doubt in my mind that it was Ellen," Katya told him as she shook her head in disgust. She felt completely responsible for it. Whatever went on between the two women, she'd incited it all. "The saddest part of it is…I can never be what either one of them wants me to be."

"What do you think they want you to be, Kat?"

Katya looked forward and shook her head. She reached out and drummed her fingers on the hard smooth surface in front of them. It was warm and a steady beat drummed under her touch. Her eyes watered and her heart clenched as it so often did while she sat there. She couldn't answer her husband's question. Her throat closed and her tears ran hot.

"Alexi, I hate leaving," She'd rasped. After all of the day's crying, screaming and smoke inhalation her voice was hardly there anymore. "Every time I come here it's harder to go."

Alexi grasped her hand between his palms and kissed it, dried blood and all.

"Shh, Katyy," He whispered over her knuckles. "We don't have to go right now. We'll stay. We can stay all night if you want."

He figured that even if they somehow both drifted off to sleep their cuffs would sound for reveille at 0500. They could make it to their jurisdictions on time once they woke, and even if they didn't, he hardly cared. He wouldn't make her leave this time. He wanted to stay too. It was worth the possible reprimand.

Katya nodded at his assurance and curled up in her chair.

"Are you going to read, myshka?" Alexi asked as he tried to get comfortable in his own seat.

Though Katya never did it while they were there together it had become her ritual whenever she came to visit on her own. Sometimes she read aloud her favorite stories or poems but mostly she read from the journal she'd recently started keeping.

"I want to. I'm just too tired."

Alexi smiled as his wife yawned. When she was sleepy; her eyes heavy and lips pouted, he thought she looked about fifteen years old. It always reminded him of their youthful romance.

"That's okay, Katyy. This time I'll do it, dah?"

She'd looked a bit skeptical at his offer.
"Mm…what would you read?"

Alexi looked at his cuff and opened a few files before projecting one.

"How about the manual to my rifle?" He'd suggested.

"Nyet," She grimaced. "Too violent."

He nodded and scrolled through a few more of his recently opened documents.

"I have a mathematics article from Gamma Station on inter-universal geometers," He'd shrugged. "It's something."

Katya stopped herself from rolling her eyes. The topic might very well put her to sleep but it was the sound of his voice that mattered after all. She nodded, happy that he was actually volunteering. She wasn't sure how Alexi spent his time in the lab when she wasn't there with him but she was sure reading wasn't part of his routine. If he was going to do it then he might as well read something that he enjoyed.

"Dah, malysh. GaDsi'tsah."

"Okei. Poost buDzet poTvohyemuh, myshka."

They both woke hours later to the sound of their cuffs sounding reveille. They hated to leave but the reassuring smile of a nearby lab attendant gave them the push they needed. They had enough time to hurriedly shower, change and peek in on Saul in Med Ward for a mere moment before reporting for their respective morning briefings.

Since that night they hardly had a chance to go back at all let alone together. They were far too busy.

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 119B: ASSIGNMENT; TIGH

YEAR: 2315

In the days following the ambush not only did Tawny bring Anders aboard Alpha but the station had several other new residents. While recovering Saul filled Ellen in on what Athena had told him during the attack. The two kept the news of D'Anna's possible connection to the event a secret. They knew it would do the system little good to have that knowledge. Ellen made the decision to remove D'Anna from the basestar herself. She decided once and for all that she wanted everyone with her on Alpha Station. As long as Sam was aboard now she figured it wouldn't make much of a difference. The two per ship precaution was already being ignored for him. She was through station hopping and being away from her family for days on end. Her husband had a hole in his arm. Her daughter was an emotional wreck. She needed to be able to have a handle on her own family again while still doing her job. Without asking permission from the EOC or the security administration Ellen brought both Sharon and D'Anna off of the basestar and back to Alpha Station. She thought it better to ask for forgiveness than approval, though she hardly cared about the forgiveness part anymore. Although Sharon was wary of going against military orders Ellen assured her that it would be fine. She told her that in a few days she would have everything settled. Ellen promised that soon she would send for Karl and have their things moved and their duties transferred. Sharon was so happy at the prospect of living closer to Blaze that she went along with Ellen's idea without protest.

Only Margot refused to leave the basestar. She'd taken full responsibility for the system-wide ambush. She blamed herself for ever bring her birthmother aboard the cylon ship. No amount of consoling from Ellen or Athena was helping. She was in an awful place. She wanted nothing but to stay on the basestar and work day and night to solve the atmosphere problem. She was on a mission of personal redemption and she couldn't be talked out of it. Ellen promised her over and over that D'Anna's message to the bots was going to be a secret kept only between cylons but it didn't matter to the young woman. As Ellen became more frustrated she tried to bribe Margot by promising that she no longer had to wait for a station transfer. She encouraged her to ignore her orders and return with them to Alpha. She promised that she would take the brunt of the blame and that Margot would see no adverse ramifications. She swore to make sure that the Specialist's record would stand unblemished. Ellen just didn't care anymore. She'd spent too long trying to help the people of Earth Orbit within the boundaries of their laws. Now she would do what she needed to. She was breaking rules left and right anyway. Doing it for Margot was a no brainer, but the girl refused to leave the cylon ship no matter how much Ellen tried to convince her.

D'Anna was quiet and compliant as she left the ship. She finally understood what she'd most likely done. On some level she felt guilt, though most of that guilt was in the pain she'd caused her daughter. She left with Sharon and Ellen willingly, not wishing to cause any more harm.

Ellen was angry at D'Anna but she couldn't fault her too harshly for what she'd done. They had brought the Three back to help and in her own way she had tried more than any of her counterparts. When Ellen looked at D'Anna she saw all of the mistakes she'd made with the model's line and in turn she too blamed herself. On the shuttle ride to Alpha Ellen could feel D'Anna's disappointment over how things had ended with Margot. She couldn't help but pity her. She made yet another promise, vowing to the other cylon woman that she would get Margot to come aboard Alpha before the New Year came. D'Anna had just nodded solemnly. The look of terror and hurt in her child's eyes had bruised her faith for the first time in centuries.

Ellen managed to keep the EOC from doing much to stop her new plans. Just days after the new residents arrival she was able to arrange quarters for all of them aboard Alpha. Sam and D'Anna each had their own cabin and Sharon was settling into hers, anxiously awaiting Helo's arrival. Saul was released from the ward and Ellen was finally able to give him the attention he deserved. She was still being pulled in so many directions but she was close by instead of a quadrant away. It made it all so much easier. With the holiday coming she was so thankful to have her family together again and now they'd enjoyed their first family meal since before the attack.

Ellen invited Blaze to dinner. She had hoped an extended invitation to Margot would get the girl off of the basestar but it didn't work. Ellen was disappointed not to have all four children with her but though they missed Margot the evening had been pleasant. Conversation was kept light. They took care to avoid speaking about their current reality. They mostly shared funny stories, recounted old memories and told jokes. It was good to laugh together despite the obvious employment of denial.

Ellen had been careful not to mention Sam all night. Since hearing Tawny's explanation of why she'd brought him aboard Ellen was totally confused. Sam was less than forthcoming with her. He still only wanted a visit with Katya. Tawny seemed to agree that it was the right thing to do. Ellen knew in some way that she needed to make it happen. She had started hounding Katya to agree to see him soon after he arrived. It was causing friction between them as the young woman refused again and again. Ellen chose not to bring it up at dinner. They needed a night to themselves without constant worry and endless contemplation.

Katya and Alexi still hadn't shared their secret with the Tighs. The right time eluded them. They were all so busy. So much was happening. The couple debated doing it at dinner but uncertain reactions lead them to forgo it. They wanted Saul and Ellen to have a relaxing night in. They promised each other that they would tell them before the New Year. It was only days away.

With the meal finished Blaze and Alexi sat on one side of the L shaped sofa playing a game on the image screen. On the other side Katya sat quietly by Saul's side. Since he'd been shot she had become overly attentive. She went to visit him in the ward as often as her duty would allow. Once he came home she helped Ellen care for him as much as she could. Though he constantly grouched in protest she poured him water, got him snacks and fixed his pillows. Despite her diligent care Katya hardly spoke to him. She wasn't ready yet. She wanted him to be well but she was still so angry.. Though she'd accepted his explanation and felt for his suffering the facts were still raw and hard for her to digest. Her helpful actions were the only way that she could prove to Saul and to herself that she still loved him in spite of her anger. Ellen knew that it was all part of the way Saul and Katya were healing. She wouldn't push them to talk in any depth until they were ready.

The day Katya found out about New Caprica Ellen felt like her family was falling apart. Though she hated that Saul had been hurt she knew in her heart that his injury was what helped them bind together and refuse to crumble. If he hadn't been shot, if Katya had not been faced with losing him Ellen knew the girl would have never given him the chance to explain. Ellen had a new confidence. Now she knew that her family could make it through anything.

"Game off," She ordered as she flopped down between the two pairs in the corner of the sofa.

"Just a sec, Ellen," Alexi protested. "I'm almost done kicking this loser's ass."

"Game off," She repeated as she shut it down with her cuff.

The screen went blank and the shared look on the boys' faces made both Saul and Katya chuckle.

"I could have come back from that," Blaze said as he threw the tablet control down by his side and crossed his arms.

"No fucking way, rocket-jock," Alexi scoffed.

"Well, we'll never know, will we?" Ellen said pertly. "So let's move on."

She reached for Blazer's discarded tablet.

Soon she had a folder full of files projected over the wall's image screen.

"Aunt Ellen, what are you doing?" Katya probed suspiciously.

Ellen didn't answer.

"What the frak are you looking for?" Saul followed.

He grimaced when he saw that she'd opened their family album folder.

"The New Year is coming," She smiled with a shrug. "It's the holiday season. We're all together."

They all stared at her silently for a half second.

"Oh no!" Katya suddenly whined, throwing her head back and wincing.

"Oh yes," Ellen insisted as she hovered over the file. "C'mon. We watch it every year."

"Wait, is that what I think it is?" Blaze smirked. "Twinkle toes?"

He raised a brow at Katya and she palmed her forehead.

Ellen smiled and opened the file. It was Katya's first performance in Tchaikovsky's Nutcracker Suite; a seasonal ballet from the region of the Eastern Federation. They watched the recording of it every winter.

Hundreds of years before the people moved to the space stations in Orbit many holidays had been celebrated around the time of the New Year. Though some people held on to specific ancient traditions and beliefs the season had become a general time for togetherness and thanks. People exchanged gifts with loved ones and shared large celebratory meals. Parties were held and drinks were had. When the Tighs first came aboard they had related it to the Winter Solstice celebrations practiced on the Twelve Colonies. Soon they developed their own yearly customs just like any other Orbit family.

"It's tradition," Ellen said proudly but they all groaned in response.

"Aunt Ellen, no one wants to watch it but you," Katya complained. "We've all seen it like ten times. And it's totally embarrassing for me."

"It is not, kitten. You were so adorable."

"Ellen, don't torture the kids," Saul grumbled.

Hurt and disappointment immediately shown in Ellen's eyes. She'd been so happy to finally be together and watching the holiday ballet was a family ritual she'd come to treasure over the years.

"Is sitting here and watching this as a family really torture?"

The slight intentional waver in her voice shut everyone up. They all felt badly to upset her, especially with the stress she'd recently been under. They all relented just to make her happy for a night.

"No, Ellen," Alexi assured her. "Of course not. Let's watch."

Ellen grinned at his considerate surrender. She was satisfied with the success of her blatant guilt trip.

Kayta rolled her eyes and slouched in her seat as Ellen clicked the file and the overture started.

"There are cookies on the counter if anyone wants," She offered with a smile before bringing her feet up under her and getting comfortable.

She turned the cabin lights off with her cuff controls and settled in.

Everyone else had fallen to sleep on the sofa before the second act even started but Ellen stayed up watching intently. Her eyes welled with pride and her heart filled with beautiful memories as she watched her little girl dance on the screen. She looked over at her daughter; sleeping next to Saul with her head resting on his good shoulder as he snoozed away beside her. Every day that they had together for the last fifteen years had been a blessing to Ellen. Every single day. She was even thankful for recent days that had threatened to break them because now she was sure that those trials would only bring them closer. She'd been wrong to doubt her family. Ellen hated to admit it but Laura had been right. Whether she was just trying to cover her own hide or not Laura had insisted that Katya was capable of understanding what Saul had done on New Caprica. She told Ellen with fire in her eyes how much she knew that Katya loved them and how she was sure that nothing could change it. For some reason hearing it from Laura made Ellen believe it more than she ever had. She felt guilty for having lacked faith in the two people who she loved most.

When her eyes went back to the screen she smiled again. She'd saved the costume nightgown that Katya was dancing in. It was in the back of their closet in their bedroom and the matching slippers hung on the wall of Katya's old room. The girl had gone through hundreds of pairs over the years and as many costumes, but every now and then Ellen would save an item or two from a special performance. They were mementos from ballets that touched her; ones that she knew Katya put her heart and soul into. Ellen just couldn't part with them. Satin slippers, little sparkling hair pieces, a tutu or two, a memory attached to each one. Even when Katya wasn't at the cabin Ellen felt surrounded by her. Their home was filled with echoes of her youthful giggles. Her old things were still scattered around in plain sight and every spot held some kind of memory. Not far down the corridor Ellen knew another woman was wishing that the priceless memories were her own. Laura had nothing but a few faded stretch marks to prove that Katya was her daughter. Ellen thought of how empty the other cabin must have felt. She looked at Katya again and this time her heart clenched. She was caught off guard by what she saw. Never before had she allowed herself see Laura Roslin in the girl she'd raised. She couldn't. Not even when she was a child. She had no problem taking in every Adama attribute that Katya had inherited. She loved her striking blue eyes and her dark flowing hair. It wasn't out of intentional malice but she just always seemed to ignore the physical traits passed down by the girl's mother. She couldn't ignore them anymore. In the darkened cabin with only the dull glow of the screen reflecting on the young woman's face Ellen could see Laura so vividly. She could see her in Katya's cheek bones, in her soft pale skin and the curved bow of her lips. Ellen's eyes watered. She swallowed hard and looked down at her cuff. She brought up Laura's name and sent a quick message before she could change her mind. When it was done she let herself drift off to the last few numbers of the ballet.

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 126B: ASSIGNMENT; ROSLIN/ADAMA

YEAR: 2315

Bill and Laura had finally spent a quiet day with each other. Since the ambush things were tense. Bill hadn't been given many shifts. During the week he'd spent much of his time with Saul while he was in the ward recovering. With Ellen working on getting everyone in once place Bill took on her role as the Colonel's worried companion. They played games on his tablet, told old stories, and bitched about the ward staff. Laura brought them lunch every day until Saul was discharged. For the first few days she messaged Bill to come meet her outside of the curtain to get the afternoon meal. Sometimes she would just leave it with an orderly. She couldn't find the nerve to face Saul. She was terrified of it. The night of the ambush she hadn't followed Bill and Ellen inside his curtain after Katya sped off. She couldn't look at him knowing the pain she'd caused, no matter how unintentional it was. Later, when she and Bill were back in their cabin for the night Laura finally confessed to what had gone on and to why she and Ellen had been fighting. When she told Bill that Katya had attacked Saul after her slip up he'd looked like he was going to be sick. Laura knew that he didn't blame her but the look on his face crushed her anyway. A few days later when Bill came home from a visit to the ward he was able to assure Laura that the Tigh family was going to be alright. Saul was confident about it and so Bill was too. He tried to reassure Laura that she didn't have a reason to hide from the colonel. Though she was unsure of Bill's words she put on a brave face the next day and delivered the injured man's lunch to his bedside. When Saul first looked at her from his bed all she could give him was a quick whispered apology before her eyes watered. He shook his head and told her that there was no need. He told her that it wasn't her fault and that Ellen would see that soon. Laura believed that she had Saul's forgiveness and understanding but she didn't expect Ellen's.

The two women crossed paths only a handful of times during the week following their intense confrontation. The unexpected expression of gratitude that Laura had offered Ellen in the bunker had been the last words they'd exchanged. Since then they hadn't spoken when in each other's company. Their eye contact consisted of fleeting glances. They didn't offer each other hellos or goodbyes. They hardly nodded and yet somehow the tension between them was gone. Somehow Laura felt more comfortable in Ellen's presence than she ever had before. They hadn't resolved a thing that day. They'd done nothing but tear each other apart and rain a thousand angry wounds upon one another and yet somehow Laura found herself looking at Ellen in a new way. She'd always seen a manipulative opportunist, a user, a drunk and a tramp. It wasn't as if those facets of the woman were gone, but now when Laura looked at Ellen Tigh she saw so much more. She saw a full but injured heart, a leader, a wife and a mother; the mother of her child. The strangest part was that Laura could feel that Ellen was looking at her differently as well. She could sense it.

With Saul discharged Bill and Laura decided to give the colonel and his family their space. It was Helo's first full day aboard Alpha and Bill invited the Agathon's to dinner to celebrate. It was the first time he and Laura had true invited guests to their quarters. They ordered a catered cabin meal and even had some wine that Helo brought from Beta Station. Bill and Laura were both surprised at how much it made the cabin feel more like their home.

There was a shared sense of strangeness at one point in the night when it was mentioned that both couple's children were at the Tigh's for dinner. It wasn't spoken about in much detail but it was understood that both Katya and Blaze were with their family, with their adoptive parents; the ones they knew and loved in a home that felt safe and familiar. While both couples were grateful for the family Saul and Ellen had created for their son and daughter the absence was felt at their table. Their children weren't with them but they were where they belonged.

Unlike the dinner at the Tigh household they didn't avoid the most important topics at hand. The four resurrected souls tried to take advantage of their time together. They expressed concerns and notions over their purpose and goals. Unfortunately none of it seemed to get them anywhere.

Sharon was still keeping D'Anna's secret under Ellen's instruction. She hadn't even told Helo. There seemed to be little use in upsetting everyone else. Ellen was right; the bots were coming for them anyway. That hadn't changed. Whether or not D'Anna had incited the latest attack was mostly irrelevant. The point was that they were coming back. Sharon hoped her unease over the secret wasn't noticeable. Besides that bit of hidden knowledge she had little to add that she felt would be helpful. It seemed to be the case for all four of them.

After the Agathons left Laura felt slightly disheartened. She had been hoping for something a little more productive. They had no grand ideas or revelations, only a nice meal. What had started out as a pleasant evening had left the air in the cabin tinged with a hint of hopelessness. She was surprised when Bill stopped her from cleaning up the dishes. He came up behind her at the kitchen sink, giving her a warm kiss to the neck. She could tell by the way his lips lingered that he had specific intentions and she was immediately relieved. Since the ambush Bill had been unwilling. He was plagued by his nerves. While Laura sought out physical contact for distraction Bill refused, unable to concentrate, unsettled by the air around them. She only wanted to escape that air in his kisses but for nights on end he'd turned her away.

Sometimes Bill just couldn't pacify Laura in that way. Knowing that it was such a form of evasion for her still bothered him. There were times when he was glad to give her the comfort that she needed but after the ambush he just couldn't comply. Since then he'd been too overwhelmed by the circumstance, by what he'd seen in the corridors, by what he knew was still to come. His mind was constantly replaying the moment he'd left Saul and Katya on the other side of the burning stack of crates. He couldn't perform with that so fresh in his memory no matter how much Laura needed him. She wanted his protection and love but she also wanted refuge from all of her own fears, worries and mostly her guilt. Bill hadn't been in any shape to offer her that. His own state of mind was too unsure. After a relatively quiet week and a decent dinner in what they now called their home, he was finally feeling more receptive to expressing whatever they each needed.

Laura's relief was quickly overshadowed by her surprise over Bill's eagerness. Only a night ago he'd turned away from her in bed; stopping her roaming, almost pleading hands and giving her his back. In the kitchen he turned her roughly before lifting her onto the counter. It made her chuckle. Had he done that in their former bodies she knew that they would both be paying for it later with strained muscles and hurt joints. The bodies they inhabited now had hardly been used, had never seen sickness or the stresses of a life lived. They both felt it; the hint of newness and the few slight years shaved off by Ellen's miscalculations. At first it had felt foreign and strange. Now it just felt good. With Laura propped atop the counter Bill leaned in for a kiss, the veracity of which made up for the last week of cold chaste nights all on its own. He wrapped one arm around her to brace the small of her back and let his other hand slide up her skirt. He was glad and more than aroused to see her wearing one. In their old life he had the privilege of seeing her legs peeking out of the skirts of almost every suit she wore on a daily basis. Now she hardly sported them at all. She wasn't the president anymore. She was a tutor and a military wife. Skirts weren't practical for everyday life on a space station but they were perfectly practical for what he was doing to her now. Laura gave a little gasp when Bill's fingers slipped past the last satin barrier and hit his target.

Bill made sure Laura came twice before ever uttering a word to her. It was his apology for not being able to give her what she needed before. When she was breathless and panting atop the counter he smiled and brushed his hidden knuckles down her inner thigh as he waited for her to catch her breath.

"That's good, Laura," He huskily whispered with a wry smile as she road the last waves of pleasure. "That's better." He soothed. "Need a break?"

When she took a large gulp of air and nodded he chuckled and leaned in to kiss her again. As he pulled back to look into her eyes he saw relief and gratitude hidden behind the haze of lusty satisfaction.

"Break's over," He mumbled before picking her up off of the countertop and bringing her to their rack.

It was theirs. They never had a bed that was truly theirs before. They had her tiny cot on Colonial One that led them to the floor or her desk most times. For a short time they had her lumpy mattress in her tent on New Caprica. Most often they had his rack on Galactica but though Laura felt at home with him there she had always technically been a welcome guest in his space. They'd always just shared what the other had. Bill found the thought of a place that was truly theirs together sort of romantic.

After Katya revealed their legal Orbit marriage Bill and Laura hardly spoke of it but within Bill's own thoughts he secretly called Laura his wife. Sometimes he even said it out loud to Saul or when referring to her in unfamiliar company who didn't know any better. It made him feel good to say it, to think of her that way.

He loved the fact that Laura was his wife, his lover, the mother of his child. He loved that she was everything that she could never be in their last life. Though they'd both been dragged from eternal paradise and though there was war and death around them, a large part of Bill was grateful to be there with her experiencing a life they had never gotten to live. It was too hard for him to explain so he showed her with every caress and every thrust of his hips between the sheets of their bed. When he'd given her everything he could he finally sought his own release with the veracity of a much younger man and took her with him once more. In the back of her mind Laura thanked Ellen for her mistake for the first time. They'd been lying in tangle of limbs and bed sheets ever since.

"Where did that come from?" Laura asked after she gathered herself enough to speak.

Bill gave a little groan and kissed her shoulder.

"A week of holding out?" He considered.

She hummed in agreement but she wasn't satisfied with his response. She'd seen something more in his eyes as he frakked her senseless.

"That's it?"

"That's not enough?" He scoffed. Laura shrugged and he suddenly felt the need to justify his unexpected zealousness. "Do you think it's easy to sleep next to you every night and not be in the right state of mind to do anything about it?" Bill posed defensively.

She squinted and smiled suspiciously against his chest.

"And what's changed?"

Bill Shrugged.

"Nothing I suppose."

"Things are no better, Bill."

"That's true."

"So why now?"

"You seemed to be enjoying yourself well enough," Bill evaded.

He was at least confident in that. Her almost lyrical hums and moans had told him as much.

"Of course I did. I always do. The quality of the performance isn't what I'm inquiring about. I'm asking about the motivation."

"Frak, Laura. You're speaking like a politician. What if I said the motivation was tits and ass?"

"Then I'd say you're speaking like a sailor, Bill," She countered. It got a reluctant laugh from him. "I'm not complaining. I'm just curious."

He grumbled and settled his body further into the warmed mattress.

"I guess I was just thinking."

"Of?"

"You? Us."

"Well I'm glad no one else was on your mind during all of that."

Bill sighed at her sarcasm.

"It's more than that…I was just looking at you and thinking about everything you mean to me. Everything that we are to each other…how much has changed."

"Changed."

Bill didn't like the sudden stiffness he heard in the way she echoed him. The fact that emotion still scared Laura more than anything was almost irritating to him. He hated that he still had to feel hesitant about sharing his own feelings for fear of upsetting her. It made him want to expose her to it all the more. After all they'd been through on Bill knew that she could handle it. She just didn't like it.

"Laura, I know that our souls have been together for eons. I know that. I feel it but…I can't remember it. Not the details. Not where we came from before this. All I remember are those few precious years we had together in the fleet. It was too short, Laura. It meant everything to me but in the end all I wanted was more time with you. Death gave us that I suppose, but until it comes again I won't know exactly what it brought us the first time. I'm sure the afterlife with you was paradise…but I just don't have the memories. I do know what this life has brought us. Sometimes I feel guilty for thinking this way, for being glad to be here with you. If this world wasn't in such a frakked up state then we would have never been brought back. To be thankful that the civilization we gave our lives to save is once again on the brink of destruction sounds wrong." Laura was silent and unresponsive by his side so he just went on. "I guess what I'm saying is that I'm not glad for the reasons we came back. I just can't help but feel like this is the time that I used to wish for, the life I wanted to live with you; the one we never had time for. It isn't ideal and it isn't easy. Most of it isn't even pleasant. It's just as dangerous and tentative as the last…but we're together and so much is different."

"Different," Laura paused. "You mean I'm different."

The tone in her voice sounded almost accusatory. It wasn't fair. He was trying to express himself and as usual her reaction was less than encouraging.

"Laura, I've kept this from you for months because I was afraid of how you would take it. I didn't want it to diminish anything that we had before. The woman who you were back then was more than I could have asked for. I still cherish everything you were to me and everything you weren't. It's just that this life has brought us so much and I love that too." Bill steeled his will and decided to be as honest with her as he could whether she liked it or not. "The first night that Saul told me about Katya I came home to you, to this bed and I couldn't help that something in my heart had changed. Something about knowing that you were the mother of my child…I don't know…" He cringed hating how primal he sounded. "Frak. It felt so damn primitive! I was ashamed of it; especially because of how it happened. Maybe I still am ashamed or I would have told you this before. I couldn't stand thinking about what was done to you and yet the end result was only ours and I couldn't stop how that made me feel. You didn't even know she'd been born but when I looked at you that night I felt a connection that we never had before. It's only grown since then. It isn't something I can help. Blame it on baser male instincts. Blame it on something animalistic. You had my baby, Laura, and I can't help the way I see you now. It made me love you in an entirely new sense. Not more, just different. It made me want you and crave you in a whole new way. It made me want to worship your body like it was frakking Aphrodite's. You gave me a gift that I can't help being grateful for. Maybe that makes me a pig but it's the truth." He was unsure of the look on Laura's face. She had tears in her eyes but he couldn't tell if they were out of sympathy or resentment. Either way, the confession felt like a ton of bricks had been lifted from his shoulders so he kept unburdening himself. "There are parts of this life that I hate, but there are parts I can't help but see as another chance; a chance to live just a sliver of the many lives I used to wish we had together. To marry a true partner, to share a home, share a family. Sometimes I feel like it's our second chance."

Laura narrowed her eyes letting some tears slip free.

"If it was a second chance we wouldn't have missed so frakking much of it."

"I know how much we lost out on, Laura. I think of it every day. It doesn't stop me from being thankful for being here now, no matter how hard it is."

Laura shook her head as more tears started to fall.

"We missed too much. A few years sooner and we could have…"

She didn't know what a few years sooner would have given her. Rationally she knew that it wouldn't have changed much. Their relationship with Katya would probably be no easier, but they would have gotten to see that much more of the girl's life. Laura would have settled for anything more; months, weeks, days, a few more precious moments.

"It hurts, Laura. I know it hurts. I see how it hurts you every time I look into your eyes. But seeing you and Katya together now, even just standing in the same room; it makes the pain of a lost past bearable. We're all together now. It isn't easy but we're together. She's with us. We have her now." Bill's eyes watered and he swallowed hard. "You never said anything about…about the ward last week when she hugged you," He tested. He hesitated for a moment when Laura winced and her tears started to stream more steadily. "You don't have to say anything now if you don't want to…but I want you to know how much it meant to me to witness that. Seeing our daughter in your arms; it made being dragged back from the dead worth it. I'd die and resurrect a thousand times to see that, Laura." When shelet out a strangled whimper Bill clutched her body close. "You asked me weeks ago if I thought that she could ever love you. I said that I thought so. Now I know that she could…and I suspect in some way that she already does."

Bill held Laura as her body shook quietly beside his. Though he hated how much pain she still felt he was just glad that she had let her sadness surface instead of her anger. He was glad that she hadn't suddenly become detached as she so often did. He was surprised when she actually gathered her voice enough to speak.

"I held her, Bill," She cried against his neck. "And even though it felt so good I still couldn't help thinking of the thousands of times that she should have been in my arms and wasn't. I should have held her the instant she was born. I should have rocked her and fed her, wrapped her in my arms when she was hurt or scared and hugged her before school. I didn't. I wasn't there." As Laura spoke she grabbed on tighter to Bill with every word. "Ellen was there for her but not for all of it. Ellen missed out too. Katya went seven years without knowing a mother's touch. I look at our daughter and I want to see a future with her but all I see is everything that I missed. I see a past I'll never get back." She bit back her tears knowing they would just keep coming if she allowed it. "I..I just want to know what it was like."

Bill's heart dropped at how desperate her last words sounded. For a moment he considered his next words.

"You know, Laura, we've been stumped as to what we're doing here. All we've been able to do is help in the small individual ways that we can; your teaching, my service. Until we figure out our real purpose maybe there is more that we could be doing for these people. Maybe there are more tangible ways to be of significant use, to make a difference."

"Like what?"

"Well, this station has so many orphaned children. I wouldn't be opposed to considering…"

The way Laura almost recoiled from his embrace made Bill immediately stop and wince.

"You're kidding me, Bill."

She looked abhorred and maybe a little offended. He'd known the instant he said it that he shouldn't have brought it up after all. The notion had come to him not long after Laura took on her teaching position. A few times he'd witnessed her playing and laughing with the little girl she taught. The way she carried Li-Ming around the cabin on her hip, the way she spoke to her in such a soft and encouraging voice showed him a hint of what it would have been like to have seen her care for Katya. He'd witnessed glimpses of it long ago on his visits down to New Caprica before the cylon invasion. During the few months of peace they'd enjoyed Bill made many raptor trips down to the surface. Sometimes he would stop by Laura's tent school and watch her work. She had an easy way with her students. It was endearingly warm while still commanding of respect and appreciation. He had been impressed then but somehow now it was different. Now he couldn't help seeing her as a mother as well as a teacher. He couldn't help recognizing how lucky a child would be to have her.

In the control room Cmdr. Kaplan was briefed daily on the growing number of orphaned military children. Bill heard the numbers growing steadily and it made his stomach turn in the same way that it had when similar reports were given to him on Galactica. It was really only a fleeting idea; something he would have been open to had Laura been interested, but now he could tell that he'd been wrong to even mention it.

"It was just a thought," He shrugged, trying to explain himself. "Katya was one of those orphans once. Saul and Ellen saved her from facing a lonely and frightening future. There are more and more children like her every day. I didn't mean to upset you. I just thought that maybe giving one of them a home could help heal some of the hurt we all feel. Katya could use someone in the family to look up to her. It might help her grow up a bit, force her to be a good example. And we would be paying forward the favor the Tighs did for us while getting to experience some of things we missed out on."

"I don't want to replace my baby, Bill. I just want her back."
Bill let out a low and relenting breath.

"That can't happen, Laura."

She swallowed and looked away from him.

"I know."

"So...love her now."

There was a hard knot in Laura's throat and her larynx tightened around it. After a moment she was able to squelch out a response.

"I do."

Bill kissed Laura on the temple. When her eyes dried he used his cuff to turn off the dim light above their rack and rolled over. The night had run long. They were both exhausted. Before he could manage to drift too far into sleep he felt a vibration under the covers. His cuff was silent.

"Laura?"

"Mm?"

"That yours?"

"Yes..."

He could hear that she was alert, awake and nowhere near sleep. Part of him felt badly for not staying up with her. He could still hear the sadness in her voice and he felt like he'd put it there.

"What's up?"

"It's a message," She answered softly.

He turned slightly to see the glow of her cuff's screen reflecting on her face and pillow as she held her wrist above her face.

"From?"

Laura licked her lips and squinted as she read the screen's words.

"Ellen."

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR C

MED WARD

YEAR: 2315

The surgical bay was different from anything Sam had seen in his last life on Caprica. It more closely resembled something he would have seen on his Earth though it was still quite alien to him. The operating table was thin and cold, able to adjust to any individual's form. He felt its chill on his bare back. It made the constant pain in his ribs throb but it was the straps across his chest, hips and arms that made him most uncomfortable. Above him hovered a large device with a robotic arm bolted to the ceiling. He'd been told it was a surgical laser and body scanner. Tawny had explained that they had little need to cut the sick and injured unless something was being removed or implanted. To Sam's left was a small machine wirelessly linked to his cuff that projected his vitals. Other than that there was little else in the room. It was stark and sterile. There was one attending medic in the corner prepping and organizing at a small counter. It was late and the staff was minimal. The only comfort Sam had was sitting behind a glass window working at the computer controls. He could hardly move due the restraints but he was able to lift his head enough to look at Tawny through the glass and give her a smile.

He was glad when she looked up at him from the console and waved back. After adjusting a few more settings Tawny rose from her seat, left the small control room and entered the white open expanse of the surgical bay. When she made it to Sam's side she put her warm hand on his forearm. It felt good on his skin that was cold from the frigid air.

"Are you ready, Anders?" Tawny smiled down at him compassionately.

Sam tried to shrug but the restraints made it hard to move.

"I'm ready to get this over with."

"It would have been done days ago if you had cooperated," She reminded with a little less gentleness.

Once Tawny had gotten Sam to Alpha things hadn't exactly gone as planned. She'd convinced her father and Cmdr. Kaplan to back up her transfer request due to Sam's medical and mental health needs. Delta Station was more than happy to get rid of the man and approved his removal almost immediately. With Ellen's help and her persuasion of the government the request was granted. Tawny had intended on mending his broken ribs as soon as they came aboard but once Sam Anders was on Alpha Station his behavior once again became erratic. After almost a week he was finally calm enough to allow Tawny to do the procedure.

"Well I'm ready now," He mumbled.

"Good because after this I'm ready to go to bed."

"It was your idea to do this so late."

"I'm doing it this kate for you and for my staff, I might add. You've successfully pissed off yet another group of medical professionals."

Sam had caused quite the scene during his initial visit to Alpha's infirmary. With Saul still in the ward at that point Ellen had to leave her husband's bedside to attend to Sam. She's spent hours trying to help Tawny calm him down. It was the same as it had been on Delta. He fought against his security. He begged to see Kara. He begged to see Katya. He begged to see his wife. Once Sam was finally assigned his own quarters he became slightly less confrontational but the impression had already been made.

"My staff now hates you almost as much as the med staff on Delta. You make them uncomfortable. I was lucky to get one medic to assist tonight."

"I'm sorry for that."

Tawny looked down at him on the table and narrowed her eyes.

"No you're not, Anders. I think I at least know you well enough by now to know that," She challenged. "You know, my father doesn't like you either," She added.

Her comment made Sam smirk.

"Now that, I truly am sorry for," He said with a wink. "Does that mean I don't have a chance?"

"Very funny," Tawny scoffed with a roll of her eyes. "Anyway, I know I explained this once before but I just want to go over a few things. The laser above will be guided at the console by my hand. It will never come closer than a few inches from your body but I'll be able to direct it with precision. The body scanner feeds to my screen's projection and I'll be able to see a three dimensional render of exactly where I need to focus. I'll set the laser to a bone and cartilage mend and within a few short minutes those cracks in your ribs will be gone. I'll just be a few feet away behind the glass. How's that sound?"

"Sounds like a plan."

"Good. My medic will put you under in just a moment," She announced, patting his bare bicep. "You'll wake up good as new."

"Put me under?" Sam repeated, suddenly quite alarmed. "No, no. I'm not going under."

"Anders it's standard practice."

"No. No more drugs. You saw what happened last time."

He could see that Tawny was already getting fed up but there was no way that he was letting her drug him again. If he had to he would break through the straps that held him down, broken ribs and all just to avoid it.

"If I try to give you a local this is going to take even longer. We'll be sitting around until your rib cage is totally anesthetized. It's a very hard area to numb."

"Fine. Lets to go without it. Awake, no local, no drugs. Let's just do it."

"Anders, no way."

"You told me the entire treatment wouldn't take more than five minutes."

"It shouldn't, but still. Do you understand how painful it will be? Even with an intravenous painkiller."

"I can take five minutes of pain. I once fractured my ankle in the middle of a game and played the entire second half."

"That's not the same."

"It's not? You ever play a round of pyramid with a broken bone?"

"I don't even know what that is," Tawny scowled. "Look, the only time we ever forgo anesthesia during laser treatment is for spinal surgery when we need to make sure the repaired nerves are reacting properly. We do it so the patient can respond with movement as the repairs are done. It's total agony."

"This isn't spinal surgery," He defended. "It's a cracked rib."

"Just let me knock you out. You'll have a restful night's sleep at least."

"And then what? I'll wake up groggy, half out of it, not even know what world I'm in? What lifetime? I told you, Doc. I'm having enough trouble with that in my drug free waking hours."

Tawny put her hands on her hips and pressed her lips together. She looked away from him and shook her head in frustration.

"I wish you would have let me call Ellen. She would have wanted to be here for you."

"I don't need her here. Anyways, she couldn't have changed my mind either."

The doctor's expression suddenly became stern.

"You know, she's the closest thing you have to family. I can't understand how you've been treating her since you got here. I may have pulled some strings but when it came down to it Ellen got you here. Not me," Tawny scolded.

"My relationship with Ellen Tigh is over two hundred thousand years old. We don't need any tips on how to interact. Don't you worry about her."

"I'm not giving you any. I'm simply commenting on how rude you are to her just because she won't give you what you want."

"She's not trying hard enough."

"She is trying."

"She can't get her own kid to listen? What is it with that girl? Is everyone scared of her?"

Tawny suddenly looked offended at the implication.

"I am not scared of Katya. Look, I don't understand why you won't just tell Ellen what you told me."

"And what did I tell you, Doc?" Sam nearly mocked.

She sighed in frustration.

"Anders, you can keep claiming that you don't remember what you said to me in Delta's ward. That's fine, but I know now that you have more to tell. Maybe if you shared it with Ellen she'd be more inclined to help you."

Sam shook his head.

"You said that you'd talk to the Sergeant for me."

"I did."

"Did you tell him that I want to talk? That I want to apologize? You said that if I could make things right with him that maybe he could help convince her."

"Yes. I spoke to him."

"What did he say?"

Tawny groaned and rubbed at the bridge of her nose.

"Alexi doesn't say much…but his eyes told me enough. I'm sorry, Anders. I tried. It's not happening."

Sam swallowed and looked up to the robotic arm above him. He knew that getting Katya's husband to speak to him would be a long shot. He just thought that maybe getting Alexi to forgive him would encourage Katya to do the same.

"I designed those eyes you know."

"Huh?"

"The Sergeant," Sam answered. "I can't remember him from my resurrection, but I got a pretty good look at him the other day when Ellen was walking me back to my cabin. I knew it was him even before she confirmed it. He stared daggers at me, like…like he wanted to snap my neck." Anders stopped and chuckled under his breath at the thought. "Those eyes…they're his mother's. Model number Six. Saul and I designed her," Sam smiled as his pupils seemed to focus on some distant memory. "We kept joking around that we wanted to create the perfect woman, physically at least. We left her internal programming to the others. In the end he and I based her on Ellen; the way she was when she was young. In a way those eyes are hers too. I replicated the color exactly. From Ellen, to a Six, to her son."

For some reason that bit of information and the faraway look in Sam's eyes gave Tawny chills. The connections between all of these people with prehistoric roots were deeper than she ever knew, maybe deeper than she ever could understand. She thought of the words from the Quartz Plates and from the cylon hybrid's message that her people knew as their only form of scripture; Life here began out there. She had always believed it. Now she could finally see it. There was proof within Alexi's eyes. His genes were so ancient. It was hard for Tawny to grasp. They weren't simply derived from the Six that her father and his colleagues had once cloned. The Sergeant's lineage was even older than that, from yet another world. A world where Sam and Ellen were as close as she and Katya. For the first time Tawny started to understand just how old Anders and the Tighs truly were. The same way she knew that she would never look at Alexi the same again she knew that she would never look into Ellen's eyes the same way either. The woman's heart and soul had been in this fight for longer than anyone could understand.

"Anders it's late. We should really get this done."

"Do it. I'm ready."

"Are you sure about this?"

Sam gave a curt nod.

"No drugs. Do it."

"Juéjiàng," Tawny said as she shook her head in frustration.

"Hm?"

"Stubborn," She harshly translated.

She frowned and finally relented against her better judgment. She almost resented the way she let herself be so swayed by Sam Anders. It wasn't like her.

"Do you want a fucking towel to bite on?" She quipped.

Anders looked up once more at the robotic arm looming over is body.

"If you have one handy."

Tawny rolled her eyes and walked off taking her seat at the console behind the glass window. She signaled to her medic that she was about to begin. Before she started she warned Anders over the room's com system and promised she would work as fast as she could. She held back tears as she worked through the sounds of his screams. She was sure to dry her eyes before returning to his side once she was through.

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 mi

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 119B: ASSIGNMENT; TIGH

YEAR: 2315

"You're still awake?" Ellen asked with a yawn as she walked into the bedroom.

Saul still had the rack light on and was sitting up in bed staring into nothing.

"I can't sleep," He grumbled.

"You were sleeping well enough on the couch for most of the night. You snored right through the ballet. You all did. I was watching on my own."

She hadn't honestly expected them all to stay awake. She was just happy to have her family's company. It was such a comfort to be all together.

Ellen walked to the rack and bent over to give Saul a peck on the forehead before perching herself on the side of the bed.

"The kids gone?" He asked.

"Yes," She said with a sad smile. "They left a while ago. I just stayed out there to rewatch the end of the ballet. I missed some once I nodded off myself."

Saul half smiled at her sentiment though his mind was mostly elsewhere.

Ellen tilted her head noticing the far off look in his eye.

"Are you in pain? I can get you one of your pills. It should help you get to sleep."

Saul grimaced at her offer.

"I don't want those damn things."

"You're worse than kit," Ellen scoffed, "Just take one. Heck, I might take one too just for fun," She teased.

Saul shook his head in dismissal.

"How was she? You know, when she left? Was she alright?"

Each member of the family had knocked out on the sofa at various points during the ballet recording. Even Ellen, overworked as she was, couldn't keep her eyes open through all of it. Sometime after it ended they were all startled awake by a piercing shrill scream. It had come from Katya but when Saul looked next to him where she was curled up he found that she was still asleep. She struggled and cried as he called her name and nudged her a few times. When Saul couldn't shake her awake Alexi rushed over. He was worried that she would unintentionally hurt the injured man beside her. Having the same concern, Ellen got to her first. It hardly mattered. They were all well practiced in waking Katya from her frequent twilight fits. After they each tried a calling her name a few times it was Blazer's voice that eventually woke her by barking her call sign. At the sound of his barreling Koshka she sat up with a start and an exclamation that Alexi had become well acquainted with. Saul however, was far more shaken when he heard his daughter cry out the names Husker and Helo. Hearing the call signs come from her in such a frightened tone gave Saul in inexplicable chill. He immediately started to interrogate her about her dream; who she was calling for, what she wanted with them, but Katya either couldn't or wouldn't answer him. He wasn't sure. She was confused and groggy but something about the way she was acting made Saul believe that she was intentionally holding back. Once she was fully awake he continued to badger her. When he still couldn't get any further explanation from her he angrily excused himself to bed.

Ellen had insisted that Katya stay the night in her old room. She offered the boys the sofa if they wanted to stay as well. To her dismay all three declined. She knew they had all planned to call Margot together back at Katya and Alexi's cabin. She let them go without much more resistance. She figured that she could use their help in convincing the troubled cylon girl to leave the Basestar and she trusted that Katya would be well taken care of overnight by Aexi's side.

"Katya's fine, Saul," Ellen insisted. "Why the frak did you storm off to bed like that?"

"She wouldn't answer me," He answered gruffly, causing his wife to squint in feigned confusion.

"Saul, she was half asleep," Ellen defended. "She'd obviously just had a bad dream. What did you want from her?"

"I don't know," He said with frustration in his voice. "What was with that outburst?"

Ellen shrugged.

"Something scared her."

"Something. Something. What? She woke up screaming. She wasn't just scared. She was insistent."

Saul was sure that he'd heard more than fear in his daughter's voice. He heard determination and intent.

"Saul, that poor girl has suffered with nightmares since she was a child. You know how they come and go. I remember nights when we would have to stay up with her in shifts just to let each other get some sleep," Ellen recounted. "Tonight was nothing."

"Didn't you hear what she said?"

"Hear what?"

"What she woke up shouting."

"I dunno," Ellen rolled her eyes. "Something about Bill?"

"Husker," Saul quickly corrected. "She woke up shouting Husker and Helo. 'It's Husker and Helo'. She said it clear as day and loud as anything."

Ellen shrugged and leaned back on her elbows.

"Okay. Husker and Helo. What's the big deal?"

"Don't you think that's odd?"

Ellen pinched the bridge of her nose and let out a long breath.

"I don't know. Not really," She considered. "Karl just came aboard tonight. Blaze was talking about him during dinner. It could be that his arrival was in the back of her mind."

"She didn't say Karl. She didn't say Cpt. Agathon. She said Helo. Husker and Helo."

"Saul…honestly…so frakking what?"

Ellen groaned and ran a frustrated hand through the crown of her hair. She needed sleep. She was getting a headache.

"Since when does she call Bill Husker? No one does. Not in this lifetime."

"She has probably heard you do it."

Saul thought for a moment and then shook his head so hard it hurt his sore shoulder.

"No. No, Ellen. I'm sure. I've used his call sign maybe twice since his resurrection and only in private conversation."

"But Katya knows that it was his call sign. Saul, you've told her every frakking story that you could remember from your viper pilot days a hundred times over. She's heard us call Karl Helo plenty. She knew his call sign long before his download. Your days on Galactica were her favorite stories of all. I'm sure she could name about twenty Colonial pilots by their call signs off the top of her head."

Saul looked down at the crumpled blanket in his lap.

"I guess that's true," He muttered.

"You know it is. Why did that get you so upset anyway?"

"I don't know, Ellen...The way she said it. The look in her eyes when she woke up." Saul couldn't explain himself the way he wanted to so he gave up trying. "Anyway, you know how I hate seeing her like that. I always have."

Ellen gave him a soft knowing smile.

"She's alright, Saul," She insisted, smoothing out the sheets around him.

He rubbed at his tired brow.

"You know, Ellen, a few weeks ago you were the one convinced that something was wrong with her. When I told you that she was fine you said I was insulting your damned maternal instinct."

Ellen sat up straighter on the bed, annoyed by his accusation.
"I did notice a difference in her for a while but things seem okay now. Look, Saul, I think it was me after all. I was away on Delta so much. I felt guilty about not spending as much time with her. You were right; I probably put that all in my head. I'm not trying to insult you or your own intuition when it comes to Kat. I'm just saying that her nightmares are nothing new. They come and go. You know that. I wish she would talk to me. It isn't that I'm not worried. It's not that I don't see a change in her. It's just that I'm pretty sure I understand what's going on. Right now these kids are all afraid. And can you blame them? I'm not surprised that she's been having nightmares again."

Saul chewed on the inside of his cheek for a moment considering his wife's words.

"She's been having them bad since she was in that godsdamned accident," He pointed out.

"I know," Ellen nodded. "I had hoped that it was all due to the medication she was on. Once she was better and they didn't seem to go away I'll admit I was worried, but it makes sense. If you think about it the nightmares actually started up soon after Bill and Laura's resurrection. Then combat started to become more frequent and she had her accident. She's watched us bring a total of six people back from the dead. She's upset about failing her vision test and getting benched. Now she's taken on all these new responsibilities at work since she cant fly. You and Kaplan have her working on protocol reform, doing tactical planning and still running LSO shifts. She's stressed, Saul."

"So it's my fault for overworking her?"

"I'm not saying that. This is just how her tension and worry comes out, Saul. It's always been this way."

Saul was quiet and for a moment Ellen thought she'd finally convinced him that she was right.

"Husker and Helo?" He repeated after a long beat.

Ellen couldn't help but roll her eyes again and palm her forehead.

"Saul, she knows those men; who they are, who they were, because of you, because you made sure that she did from the time she was a little girl. So she used their frakking call signs? Big deal!"

Saul almost went to protest but he stopped himself and eased back into his pillows.

"I suppose that makes sense," He surrendered. They weren't getting anywhere and he didn't even know what he was actually trying to get at. He had just been overcome with the strangest feeling after Katya's outburst and he couldn't seem to get past it. Saul reached for his wife's hand and thumbed at her soft skin as he spoke. "You know I remember when she was little and I would tell her the same damn stories about Galactica over and over again. She never got tired of them…but…sometimes…sometimes I'd get tired of reciting them. So once in awhile when she would ask I would say, 'kit, you know the story. You tell it to me instead'…And she would. She'd tell it to me with excitement and vigor in her eyes. Sometimes I would swear that she could recite certain stories back to me better than I'd ever told them to her. She would add details and emotion that I didn't even think I'd conveyed to her in first place. She could tell those stories as well as if she'd been there herself. Sometimes it was…I don't know…almost spooky."

Ellen leaned back onto the bed and lay over Saul's lap.

"She was such a bright little girl, so receptive. You know it took her a while to really understand her cylon abilities. Maybe she could read your emotions. You didn't have to tell her. She just knew. "

Saul nodded as he looked down at her.

"Maybe."

"Saul, I don't want you getting mad at Kat for not being able to explain herself. You two are on such shaky grounds with each other right now and you see that she's trying to do right by you."

"I'm not mad at her, Ellen. I just got…frustrated. She woke up yelling those men's callsigns like she meant it, like she had a reason. All I asked was why. She told me that she didn't remember. I think she lied to me. Why would she do that?"

"You don't know that she lied."

"A father knows."

"And I don't?" Ellen challenged. "Saul what are you trying to say? I can feel the damn suspicion coming from you. What is it?"

He didn't know. They were both exhausted.

"Forget it, Ellen. She woke me out of a deep sleep too. My bum shoulder was bothering me. I don't know why it got to me. You're right. I should let it go."

Ellen sat up with a sigh.

"You need your rest, Saul. I want you to get better." She scooted next to him and placed her hand on his chest. She gave his cheek a few light kisses as she inched her palm slowly down his body. "I want to know I'm not going to hurt you when I…"

"Ellen," He warned.

"Alright," She huffed. "I can wait." She turned and lifted herself off of the bedside. "I'm going to get ready for bed. I'll bring your pills in a second."

Saul winced at the mention of his medication but he didn't protest.

"Hey, Ellen?" He called after her. "When's the last time you checked on Anders?"

"Early this afternoon. I brought Helo along. He asked to see Sam when he first came aboard. We didn't stay long. He wasn't in the mood for visitors. Why?"

"Because we went all night without hearing squat from that lunatic. Since when does that happen?"

Since Sam's arrival on Alpha he had proven to be almost as much of a nuisance as he had been on Delta Station. He wasn't getting violent any longer but he was still confrontational with almost everyone he encountered. Ellen tried her best. She spent as much time with him as she could. Though he would almost always protest to her visits at first he would eventually settle down enough for them to have semi-civil conversations. Though their conversations most often went nowhere Ellen could still see elements of her old friend in Sam. Against her better judgment she'd stocked his bar. It wasn't as much for him as it was for her. She needed a drink or two in order to get through some of their more turbulent times together. Ellen knew that Tawny was checking in on him as well and she had learned from the guards that Sam never seemed to deny the pretty doctor's house calls. It actually comforted Ellen to know that Sam had some kind of friendly interaction in the world besides her. Though Tawny wouldn't share the content of their talks Ellen sensed that Sam had opened up to the young woman, at least a little.

"I'd like to think the best," Ellen said, forcing some light into her voice. "Maybe he's calming down."

Saul rolled his eye.

"Fat frakkin' chance."

"His guards would have alerted me if anything was wrong tonight. There's a centurion stationed with his marine detail now."

"Did he ask for kit today when you saw him?" Saul tested.

"Of course," Ellen said over her shoulder as she made her way to the head.

It made Saul cringe. He was sick of it.

"You any closer to getting that crazy bastard to tell you what he wants with her?"

Ellen stopped at the head door and leaned against its frame.

"He won't tell me. Not really. He'll only say that it's extremely important to him. I've told you before, I think it's time she spoke to him. What harm could it do?"

"She doesn't want to, Ellen."

"I know. I know and I wanted tonight to be pleasant so I didn't bring it up to her in front of the boys but I'm going to again and I could use your help with her."

Ellen crossed her arms over her chest.

"Me? After all she and I have been through in the past week you think she's going to listen to me? And why would I do that anyway?"

He had no desire to force Katya to go see Anders. Saul understood that the man was confused during the shock of his resurrection but he couldn't erase the memory of Sam grabbing onto her arm so tightly and how frightened she'd looked. The way Sam had been carrying on about her ever since was unsettling. He'd developed an obsession with the girl. If he wasn't asking for Katya he was asking for Starbuck and he did it no matter how many times they reminded him that she wasn't there. Saul suspected that Anders hadn't awoken with his full mental capacity. Something was off with him and he didn't want his daughter around someone so obviously crazed.

"Sam is causing a military disturbance, Saul. He requires constant attention that the others haven't needed. Bill, Laura, Sharon, Helo; they may have been shaken at first but they did their best to get used to this world. D'Anna may have accidentally incited a godsdamn ambush but at least she's been frakking quiet. Sam causes a disruption everywhere he goes. Even with him on Alpha now he still makes my life ten times harder than it needs to be. You know how I feel about him. He was our friend once. It may have been ages ago but he meant something to the both of us back then. He isn't acting like them man we knew. It's a problem that could possibly be rectified by Katya meeting with him. You're her superior officer. She won't go if you ask as her father but she'll have to if you make it an order."

"Ellen I…"

"Saul, Tawny said something to me after she brought him over. I've known that girl since she was twelve years old and I've never seen such a strange look in her eyes. She said she couldn't explain why but someone needed to convince Kat to see him."

"So Sam conned her into working on his behalf."

"You know Tawny. She isn't so easily swayed, Saul. She said that he told her things that made her believe that it was important that he and Katya meet again. She told me that she couldn't say anymore and that I'd have to ask him myself. I've been trying to get it out of him for days and he won't tell me."

Saul avoided Ellen's sharp gaze and looked back down to his lap.

"He still asking for Kara too?"

"Yes," Ellen admitted. "It's like he can't keep the names straight. He's always so frantic that he slips sometimes when he asks for Katya. I know it's just an accident but it's getting on my nerves. He uses them damn near interchangeably."

Saul suddenly felt a lump grow in his throat. He swallowed it down and shook his head.

"Get ready for bed, Ellen. It's late."

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 139B: ASSIGNMENT; ISAKOFF/PETROV

YEAR: 2315

Laura hadn't been sleeping very long before the nightmares took over her dreams. She'd actually fallen to sleep feeling quite well. After her emotional exchange with Bill she was too tired to talk anymore. When he inquired about her message from Ellen she just brushed it off and told him to go to sleep. Once she was sure that he'd nodded off she opened the notification the other woman had sent her. At first it seemed like it must have been a mistake. It was comprised of nothing but two short streams of numbers and letters. There was no explanation, no greeting, not even a 'frak you' included in the note. It took Laura a few minutes to figure out what it was that Ellen had sent.

They were links to files located in the Tigh's family album network folders. Once Laura made the connection she realized that Ellen was directing her to look them up. The directive lead to two full length recordings of the same ballet. The two performances were dated eight years apart. Laura soon realized what Ellen had shared. It was the ballet that she'd seen Katya dance to when Saul brought her to the theater for the first time. He told her that it was a holiday piece. He said that Katya and Alexi's cousin Yuri Petrov had once danced the children's leads and then years later taken on the adult roles. He told her that as a tradition they watched the recordings of the performances every winter. Laura finally surmised that with the system's holiday season upon them the Tighs must have been watching the videos as a family. Ellen had led Laura to the files so that she could watch too. It was an apology. It was thanks and forgiveness. It was nothing, but it was everything. Laura knew that for Ellen Tigh the gesture was probably akin to groveling at her feet for forgiveness. After watching one of the ballets for a while Laura brought up Ellen's message and simply responded with the word "breathtaking". She didn't get a reply. She didn't expect one. She didn't need one. She watched her daughter dance a while longer and then fell to sleep grateful to have been shown something so wonderful. She hoped that she would dream of it. She didn't.

An hour later Laura woke up with a gasp. Despite the fact that she wore nothing but the bed sheets she was soaked in a cold sweat. She was glad when Bill didn't stir, probably a result of their vigorous lovemaking and the wine Helo brought from Beta Station. She ran to the head and splashed some cold water on her face hoping that it would help but she knew that she wouldn't be getting back to sleep any time soon. This time the nightmare was different. It was the same dream of the tubs and crumbling pillars but there was more to it, something new. When a lukewarm shower didn't calm her anxiety Laura did something that totally went against her better judgment. She decided that she wouldn't wake Bill. He wouldn't understand, not really. She gritted her teeth and used her cuff to send a shaky and tentative message to her daughter asking if she was awake. She'd cringed after sending it. Like her response to Ellen she had no expectations of a reply and she almost jumped when her cuff buzzed so quickly in response. Laura winced when she saw that Katya had snarkily replied 'I am now'. She typed a frantic and half coherent apology, kicking herself for her foolish impulse. It was the middle of the night. She hadn't been thinking straight. She hardly wanted to see Katya's response to what she knew must have read like nervous gibberish, but when her cuff chimed again she couldn't help but take a look. Katya's answer flatly read 'Come over.'

Laura couldn't resist the invitation no matter how crazy she knew she seemed in the moment. She dried her hair, threw on some clothes and quietly slipped out of the hatch. She got Vladi to follow her down the corridor to Katya's cabin leaving a marine guard on post as Bill slept.

Laura's fist shook as she lightly knocked at the entrance. She considered that she'd finally lost her mind for good. She was too nervous to knock again; afraid to wake the surrounding neighbors. Perhaps Katya had even fallen back to sleep. Laura looked at Vladi as if to ask what he thought. His red eye swept from one side to the other and before she could even focus on him she shook her head in utter disgust over what she was doing. She nearly jumped back a full foot when Katya opened the door. The girl looked at her as if she was deranged.

"What in the living fuck is wrong?" Katya whispered harshly.

Laura pinched the bridge of her nose.

"I'm so sorry I woke you."

"Is someone hurt?"

"No."

"Is anybody dead?" Katya deadpanned.

"No."

"Well then what the hell?"

"I really do apologize. I didn't mean to scare you. No one is hurt."

Laura's words didn't match the look on her face and Katya's irritation grew into concern.

"You're sure?"

"Yes."

Katya was in a short dark blue satin robe and Laura watched as she cinched it shut at the waist to cover the little matching night dress underneath. She remembered her own evening with Bill and suddenly she worried that she'd disturbed more than sleep. She felt her cheeks go red.

"Fine. If you say so," Katya said as she looked her mother over with some suspicion. "You know, every time you show up at my door you look like death warmed over."

Laura's expression bordered between offended and ashamed.

"I know. I know. It's starting to seem like a bad habit."

Katya rolled her eyes.

"Well, you're here now. Come in."

"Are you sure?"

Katya narrowed her eyes at what she deemed a stupid question.

"Well, if you woke me up for nothing we're going to have a sincere problem."

Laura nodded, mostly sure that Katya was kidding. She quietly made her way in the direction that the young woman was gesturing.

Once Laura was inside Katya let out a huff and leaned out of the hatch into the hallway.

"Spokoineh noche, Vladi," She mumbled before easing the door closed.

Laura stood anxiously in the darkened cabin. Only a small light in the kitchenette gave off a dull amber glow that allowed her to see the muted detail of the residence. Katya motioned for Laura to sit at the kitchen table. When Laura turned to do so she was distracted by a low and gargled murmuring. She squinted toward the living area where it was coming from. After her eyes adjusted to the dark she saw the sleeping form of Lt. Bishop snoring on the sofa.

"Don't mind Blaze," Katya instructed in a low voice.

"Won't we wake him?"

"Yeah right," Katya scoffed.

Laura looked unsure and hesitated to move further into the cabin.

"He's fine," Katya insisted. When she saw that Laura didn't believe her she reluctantly demonstrated. "Just watch. Blaze," She called in a soft but steady volume. "Blazer," She repeated a bit louder. "Blazer, wake up. Roslin is here and she wants to snuggle. She left the Admiral at home," Katya ribbed, further making her point and purposefully ruffling Laura's feathers.

"Okay, okay. I get it."

Katya chuckled at Laura's sharp whisper.

"He's fine," The girl insisted. "Besides if he wakes up he can get off of my couch and go sleep in his rack."

Despite Katya's nighty Laura hadn't actually disturbed anything more than restless sleep, not with Blaze so close by. Katya and Alexi were aware enough of their friend's feelings not to torture him in that way.

"Lex is in the bedroom passed out. We can talk here."

Laura nodded and looked back over at the sofa.

"Does the lieutenant stay here often?"

Katya looked over at Blaze sleeping soundly under the blanket that she'd tossed over him.

"More often than I would like. Barracks are noisy sometimes. I was lucky I never had to live there. I stayed with my parents all through basic training. Blaze and Lex both lived in officer's barracks when then moved here. They were only about fourteen or fifteen at the time . It was the only place Saul and Ellen could find for them. Then they enlisted a few years later and it became permanent. Lex escaped them when we got married but Blaze still has to suffer through the noise...and smell."

"It's kind of you and Alexi to have him."

"Alexi is the one who always gives in. Tonight though, he just fell asleep here. I didn't want to wake him. We came home from Saul and Ellen's pretty late. We all wanted to call Margot together…see if we could get her to come to Alpha. Didn't work, " Katya explained looking fairly dejected.

"Is there something wrong with the Specialist? Sharon seemed concerned and…"

"She's fine," Katya quickly cut Laura off. "She's busy. Margot thinks finding a solution to our problems is her responsibility. She's just working too hard. That's all. The three of us came back here to call her but she wasn't too receptive. We were all pretty beat. Blaze just passed out. I knew he would. We all fell asleep at my parent's earlier watching some boring video."

Katya looked at her feet as the memory of her dream flashed in her mind. She'd scared Saul half to death. When she couldn't explain her outburst to him he looked at her with as much anger as she felt within herself.

Katya cleared her throat in attempt to clear the memory along with it.

"A video?" Laura tested, knowing that it must have been the ballet.

"Sit," Katya said with a wave of her hand ignoring Laura's prompt.

Laura took a chair in the dimly lit kitchen remembering the awkward exchange they'd once had there. She thought of it so often and if she closed her eyes she could still feel the tension of their halted conversation. She could still see her hair scattered at her feet hear the diligent snips of the sheers. She could still imagine the the warmth of Katya's wedding ring in her palm and the whirring wind of the halo dryer. She could remember the fear that overwhelmed her later on when Kat almost fainted in the bedroom as they went through her closet. It all seemed like so long ago but it had been mere weeks.

Katya joined Laura at the table. She closed her robe a bit tighter flinching as it cinched over her too full breasts. She'd been too tired to employ the use of the little pump that the lab had sent her home with. Now she was regretting it.

"Are you okay?" Laura grimaced.

"I'm fine," Katya answered far too defensively.

Laura looked toward the living area and up at the shelf on the far wall. In the dark she could make out the dull silhouette of Katya's matryoshka doll. She dipped her hand into her sweater's pocket to feel for its tiny inner piece. The little token had become such a comfort to her and even so she often thought that she should return it. Sometimes she personified it as if it belonged with the rest of its family. Laura gave the matryoshka baby a squeeze considering whether she she should give it back to Katya while she was there. She knew that she would miss it when it was gone.

"So?" Katya asked, regaining Laura's focus. "Why the middle of the night wake up call?"

Katya had experienced her own trouble falling to sleep once she was settled in her rack. She wasn't embarrassed after the display at her parent's home. Everyone there was used to it. She'd been having nightmares since she was a child. She just hated to worry them and she feared falling back to sleep only to have another.

The conversation with Margot hadn't gone well and it only added to Katya's anxiety. The memory of her earlier nightmare and the thought of the other girl's troubled voice had kept her awake.

"The Admiral isn't on call tonight as far as I know," Katya observed. "You left that man's side to come here. What can I do for you?"

Laura looked down at her lap considering how it all sounded.

"I, uh, I had a nightmare," She admitted.

Katya's face froze for a long moment. She finally nodded solemnly and then rose from her chair without saying a word.

Laura watched her in the near darkness as she went over to a shadowed corner of the room. She heard some glass clinking before her daughter turned and made her way back to the table with her hands full.

Back in her seat Katya slid a small glass toward Laura and kept its mate for herself. In her right hand she held a bottle of what Laura could tell was vodka from the Isakoff family's Gamma Station distillery. Now that Bill had a standing order delivered to their cabin she had become accustomed to the strange label.

"What's this for?"

Katya chuckled under her breath as she leaned over to fill Laura's glass a third of the way.

"I've never personally needed a reason to drink. Adopted or not, I am a Tigh after all," She chided with a look of amusement on her face. She hoped it was enough to hide the concern she truly felt. She could tell that Laura had come to her because she knew there would be a sense of understanding between them. She'd left the comfort of Bill's side, deciding that she had someone more empathetic to confide in. Katya knew all too well how Laura felt. Though she pretended to make light of the visit she wouldn't turn her away. When she noticed that Laura didn't seem humored by her remark she shrugged. "You seem on edge," She added as she poured her own drink. "And besides, you've told me about your nightmares before. If we're going to talk about them this should help get us through it," She said as she raised her glass.

Laura picked hers up and looked inside. She hadn't been a fan of the liquor the first night she'd tried it at the Tigh's dinner party all of those months ago. She was almost appalled at how Katya drank it down all night as if it were smooth as milk. It seemed to aid the girl's hostility; the more she drank the more insults she passed. Laura kept away from it after that night. It reminded her of a time when they could hardly stand to look at each other. It reminded her of a time when she had looked into her child's face and seen nothing but a distasteful stranger. Now that Bill kept the booze in their cabin Laura's aversion toward the beverage had only grown. The bottle's sticker and strange writing made her think of the man who was responsible for her daughter's creation and the cold family he'd raised her in for the first few precious years of her life. It gave her yet another reason to resent the tonic. The association was irrational but she almost hated to even look at the stuff.

Laura held the drink in her hand and peered inside at its clear contents. She jumped when Katya reached over and clinked her own glass against it.

"Tvoye zdorovye," The girl offered before readily going to take a swig.

Laura stopped her.

"What's that?"

Katya gave a little smirk and took the glass from her lips.

"Uh, well it's like, cheers?" She shrugged as if she'd never been asked the question before. "It means 'to your health.'" She gave Laura a look that seemed to ask her permission to go on but Laura was still unsure. "You're going to make me drink alone?" Katya teased. She raised a brow before taking hers down in one smooth, almost defiant swig and placing the glass back down on the table. She watched Laura's hesitance with some coy mirth on her lips as if she were daring her. "As Alexi likes to say, it will burn the away the worry," She offered in a final attempt.

Katya was surprised when the doubt seemed to fade on the other woman's face. Laura instead looked her right in the eyes with intent.

"You know, Katya, I hope that you and I won't always need some form of inebriation between us in order to have a civil conversation," She said rather sternly.

Katya paused in surprise then gave a light chuckle in response. She supposed Laura had a point. The last time they were together they were as high as the heavens. She was a little surprised at how direct the other woman's comment had come off, but it actually humored her. She rather liked when Laura showed hints of the fire and ice that Saul had always claimed ran through her veins. Katya had seen it well enough during their first few encounters but once Laura found out who she was everything had changed. It was if she suddenly didn't know how to act in Katya's presence. The discomfort between them was always palpable. Katya could sense that her birthmother wasn't comfortable with her. Saul had always said that Laura Roslin stared death in the eyes without fear but Katya could tell from the very first day they had faced one another as mother and daughter that Laura feared her, or at least the idea of her. It was strange for Katya to see that the prospect of her own existence was apparently more frightening to Laura Roslin than death.

Now when they spoke Katya found an odd reassurance in the times Laura dared to be so brazen. It meant she wasn't quite as afraid anymore.

"I'd like the same," Katya admitted thumbing toward the bottle, "But 0300 after a nightmare is not the time to start," She smirked.

Laura tilted her head in consideration. For a moment she wondered if Katya had really been sleeping before she messaged her. She'd replied so quickly.

"Tvoye zdorovye," Katya repeated with a look of expectation.

This time after a brief hesitation Laura gave a little nod and then kicked her shot back quickly. She winced as it burned on the way down and Katya seemed to find it quite humorous.

"That's better," The girl told her.

Laura licked her lips gathering a bit more of the sting on her tongue. She looked up to find her daughter smiling. She looked much softer in the low amber light. She looked younger. Laura thought of her face, smiling as she danced in the video that Ellen had sent. The Katya that Laura knew didn't smile much. Not sincerely at least. She smiled through quips and little jokes but it was always fleeting and left Laura wanting more. It occurred to her that perhaps that time in her child's life had passed. She considered that her daughter might never again smile as much as she had in the recordings. Laura wondered if Ellen had thought the same thing earlier as she watched with Katya by her side.

"Kat, before either one of us says anything else there is something I feel like I need to say to you."

Katya frowned and the look on her face made Laura wish that her reluctant drink would kick in quickly. She hadn't planned on bringing it up, but now that they were alone for the first time since their impromptu smoke she felt it necessary.

"What is it?"

Katya wasn't sure if she wanted to hear whatever it was that Laura had to say. For a moment she remembered their embrace in Med Ward. She'd done it because she'd felt like it was right, because Laura needed it and in some way she'd needed it too. She'd thought of it often since then. She just didn't want to talk about it.

"Last week before the ambush…" Laura started. She fumbled and sighed deciding to get right to the point. "I want to apologize."

"Apologize."

Katya's echoing was flat and stolid. She should have known better than to believe that Laura would bring up the emotional encounter.

"About New Caprica," Laura clarified as she ran her hand through her night tousled hair. "About Saul and Ellen. I am so sorry that happened. I truly didn't know…"

"Oh please," Katya scoffed cutting her off. Laura's eyes widened at her brusque reaction. "I don't seriously believe that you did that on purpose. And for the record, neither does Ellen," She added, "No matter what she says."

Laura looked down at her empty glass. Saul had told her much the same. Bill too. She just couldn't help the guilt that she felt over the whole occurrence. The things Ellen had said to her, shared with her and screamed at her had sunk in over the long week and only intensified her regret.

"At any rate," Laura continued softly, "I'm very sorry for what happened."

Katya shook her head and picked up the bottle of vodka. She poured another shot into her own glass and quickly set it back down.

"Don't apologize for what you told me. There isn't any need," She said before taking the short drink.

Laura jumped a little when Katya sat the glass down louder than she'd intended. She frowned at the sight of another shot taken as if it were thirst quenching water. She definitely saw elements of the Tighs in Katya's ease around liquor but the determination in her eyes as she drank only reminded Laura of Bill. It was the way he drank when he was losing control. He took the booze down as if it were just another task. She could see that Katya was nowhere near as desperate and dependant on the substance as her father had been toward the end of his last life but it was still unnerving. She could see some of Bill's less admirable inclinations had been passed down despite his absence in his daughter's upbringing.

"It's the middle of the night, Katya," Laura reminded her. "That's probably enough."

She couldn't help the concerned remark but the girl acted as if she hadn't even heard it.

"What happened between me and my parents," Katya continued, "it wasn't your fault. It had nothing to do with you. Not a damn thing."

Laura nodded. Katya's assurance didn't help to melt her guilt very much. The Tighs little family had been through something awful and Laura knew that she had a part in it, no matter how unintentional. Hearing that Katya didn't see it that way was a small comfort despite also being a reminder of just how much of an outsider she still was in her daughter's family.

"On the other hand…"

Laura was surprised to hear Katya's voice harden as she went on. It wasn't any louder, still mindful of the late hour and the sleeping man just feet away but it had grown firm. Whatever she was about to say next, she meant it.

"What happened with you and Ellen..." Katya nearly gritted.

Laura's cheeks went flush.

"Katya I…"

"No," The young woman insisted with a stern palm up. "Stop. I don't want to know. I could tell well enough. I had to look at the both of you after all." She snapped, recalling the bruises each woman had sported. "I don't need the details. I didn't want to hear it from her. I don't want to hear it from you either, but I do want you to hear me."

Laura looked into Katya's eyes. The blue was so deep in the dark that they almost looked black. She swallowed hard and nodded for her to go on.

"I told Ellen the same, so don't feel as if you're being blamed. I understand that my reaction inspired whatever sick display went on between the two of you. I get that and I'm sorry, for what little it's worth anyway. But you two are the oldest women in known existence so I'm not taking all of the responsibility." Katya watched Laura squint at the harsh description. "You two can hate each other all you want but don't you dare hurt each other again. Not emotionally, not physically. Not in my name. I can't take that. I can't. So you two just do me a big favor and stay the fuck away from each other if…"

"Katya stop," Laura interjected with some whispered force. It was enough to halt Katya from finishing. "What happened between Ellen I and was…"

"I said I don't want to hear it."

"Fine. What I'm trying to tell you is that I have no intentions of hurting Ellen. I have no desire to."

Katya rolled her eyes in response.

"It's true. I don't." She and Ellen had taken so much out on one another the day of the ambush but it was over and done with. What was left between them was far more complex than hate. "There is anger there, Katya. Some of it is very old...and some of it is new to this life," She shrugged. "And I think it might still take some time for it to go away…for the both of us. But what happened last week will never happen again. I can promise you that. I think your that mother will tell you the same," She added purposefully. Laura hadn't been confident of that before tonight but now after Ellen's small gesture she was sure. Neither of them had the desire left to cause the other ill will. "And I see no need for Ellen and I to avoid each other," Laura added. "We can't, Katya…We share far too much."

Katya's mouth turned into a hard line at Laura's insinuation. She reached for the bottle and picked it up once more. This time she filled Laura's glass first before her own. It was hardly a half ounce shot but Laura still frowned at the prospect.

"So what was it this time?" Katya asked dropping the topic at hand like a hot rock. It was late; far too late to get any further into their familial issues. Laura had come for a reason. "Your nightmare," She clarified urging her to answer.

Laura sighed half out of frustration over Katya's avoidance and half at the memory of her dream.

"It was the same," She relented. "The tubs and the pillars. It was just…different this time."

"The same but different?" Katya half mocked as an effort to lighten the mood.

In a knee jerk reaction to the thought of the nightmare Laura cringed and swiftly took the shot. Alexi was right; the burn was a welcome distraction.

"Longer," She corrected, setting her glass down.

Laura could feel her hands trembling and she wondered if Katya could see it. If she did she made no indication.

Katya's focus stayed on Laura's eyes as she watched her with a look of sad expectation. She understood how difficult it could be to recount something so traumatic, something that haunted you as your body and mind tried desperately to rest. Laura had obviously come to her to share something but she was having trouble getting to the point and Katya had her own precious sleep to catch up on.

"Okay, longer," She attempted to solicit. "You and the Admiral in the tubs with the others, right?"

Laura pressed her lips together and nodded.

"And Alexi's parents? Baltar and Caprica still disappear?" Katya went on.

Laura gave another weak nod. It was still so strange to hear Gaius Baltar referred to as the boy's father.

"Lex and Blaze still pop up after them?"

Laura gave Katya another look of affirmation.

"Then Margot?"

"Yes."

Katya shrugged prompting Laura to finally take over.

"It was all the same this time, right up until then. Until I saw Margot."

"Okay so then what?"

"Usually after I see her I turn and struggle to Bill's tub. All I can think about is getting to him…but this time…"

"This time what?"

"I told you before, that there were two more empty tubs."

Katya felt her cheeks start to tingle at the thought. She'd forgotten that part.

"Yes."

"They weren't empty this time. This time after Margot emerged so did two others."

"You already saw Sam and D'Anna…Sharon and Helo. Who else would be in a resurrection tub?"

Laura paused and swallowed before answering.

"Saul and Ellen."

Katya's face went immediately hot. The mental image made her angry. She'd grown up staring at her biological parents suspended in stasis. The thought of Saul and Ellen in any such state made her ill. She knew that they had both gone through resurrection before, even boxed themselves for centuries on end but she always hated to think of it. With her father dead and Bill and Laura inanimate for most of her life she had to cling on to the vitality that ran through the Tigh's cylon veins.

She tapped her fingers against the half empty vodka bottle and huffed. She wanted to shut down and tune Laura out. She had her own nightly insanity to pick apart. She remembered when it would have been easy for her to turn the woman away. Now if she did it would only become another burden on her conscience. She forced herself to smirk as she looked down at the table.

"I'm still nowhere to be found I take it?"

"No," Laura frowned. "After I saw Saul and Ellen the dream continued on as usual. I struggled to get to Bill. The floors were trembling. There was gunfire not far off and the pillars around us were crumbling. When I got to him I tried to climb into his tub as the nearest pillar started to fall but…"

"But you were shoved out of the way," Katya finished for her, "By an unseen force," She added. "I remember. I wasn't that high when you told me." As a child Katya's dreams were so often filled by thoughts of what her mother would be like. Irrationally her feelings were bruised knowing that Laura seemed to dream of everyone but her. "You know, it's funny how I'm not included in your little vision. The gang's all there. The tubs are all spoken for."

"Katya, you almost sound offended."

The young woman shrugged with forced apathy.

"That day when you and I first felt the effects of the signal," She started. "I came to your ward room and we projected. I showed you that beach. The one you claimed you had seen before. You said we were there together. You said you dreamed of me once."

The look on Katya's face was petulant, almost pouting.

Laura shook her head and her eyes narrowed. She couldn't help what left her lips next.

"I dream of you all of the frakking time. All of the time, Katya. If you really want the truth." She could recall every time she'd dreamt daughter since her resurrection. Some dreams filled her with love and joy and others with heartache. Most brought a mix of both. The dream of her daughter as a toddler on the gray-green beach had stuck with her more than most. It had repeated a few times since its first occurrence and even more so after Katya had mysteriously shown her such a similar looking scene in a projection. That dream was always the same. Laura found Katya there as a stranger. In every instance she would sit and play with the little girl in the soft white sand until the unfamiliar feeling was gone and the tiny child was calling her mommy. It always felt so right and so perfect but in the end it always ended with grief. In a blink Laura would lose her child. Her baby would vanish among the sand and waves. What started out as unsure bliss usually ended in torment and still Laura was grateful for even those fleeting dreams because sometimes she felt that it was closest she would ever get to her daughter. "I do dream of you Katya…but those dreams aren't the same as this one."

"They're not as important as this one. I get it."

"No, Katya." Laura snapped. "You don't get it. I know exactly what those dreams of you mean and why they're so frakking precious to me. I don't need to analyze those to see what they mean. It's this one that I don't understand."

Katya forced her eyes away from Laura's and let them focus somewhere in a dark corner of the room.

"Katya, the fear this dream brings me…those tubs…the pillars…wherever I am, whatever is happening, I'm glad that you aren't there. I wouldn't want you anywhere near it, dream or not. Trust me you wouldn't want any part of it."

Katya's eyes went back to Laura's and she gave her a challenging stare.

"My husband is there, now my parents, my whole family," She contested. "Where else would I want to be if they were in trouble?"

Laura was silent for a moment before she leaned back into her chair. She wasn't sure how to answer her.

"It's just a dream," She said unconvincingly, as if on autopilot.

"Is it, Laura?"

Laura's mouth parted at Katya's sharp query but nothing came out.

"You don't believe that anymore, do you?" Katya accused. The vodka had done its job and weakened any hesitance she had in speaking her mind. "You think they mean something. You think they are some kind of clue, a vision, some kind of hint as to your purpose here. That's why you're here trying to find some kind of validation from me. Isn't it?"

"I've told you before; I learned not to ignore these things ages ago."

Katya bit her tongue hard before she spoke.

"So what's your theory then, profit? Tell me."

Laura swallowed. It had been a lifetime since anyone had called her that, mockingly or not.

"I don't have one," She said with a relenting drop of her shoulders. "I've been reading those network copies of the Quartz Plates and the transcripts from the hybrid aboard the basestar and I just can't figure it out."

Katya looked down and shook her head. The booze was clouding her judgment and she just couldn't think anymore. She was glad. She didn't want to think any longer. She closed her eyes tight for a few seconds feeling them burn behind her lids.

"I don't mind listening, Laura," She said after a beat. "But I can't help you. I'm sorry."

Laura nodded. The two were silent at the table for a few moments before Laura found her own courage in the slight buzz she felt.

"Have you...found any meaning to your own dreams?"

Katya's eyes flared at the question.

"Mine have no meaning."

Her answer was curt and forced. Laura could tell that an instant wall had gone up. The girl wasn't willing to share, wasn't willing to open up and show her weakness or fear, even to someone who could understand. Laura had never seen so much of herself in her daughter before. It hurt.

"Are you sure about that?" She tested in turn.

Katya sucked in a deep breath and gripped the edge of the table. She forced a cheap smile and picked up the bottle again. With a hum she poured another small shot for herself and then another for her guest.

Across the table Laura's brow arched.

"Katya, you gave me the first drink to get me to talk," She posed, "The second to keep me talking. Is this one to get me to shut up?" She musingly accused.

Katya laughed softly and shook her head.

"This one is to help you get back to sleep. The New Year is coming. This is a season of gift giving in our civilization. Consider this last drink a sedative, and my gift to you."

Katya meant it sincerely no matter how caustic it sounded. She lifted her glass expectantly. After a beat Laura sighed and did the same.

When Laura didn't reach to meet Katya's hand in the middle of the table the young woman leaned over and chimed the other glass anyway.

"Sladkikh snov," She said with a wry smile.

Laura tried to smile back.

"What's that one mean?"

Katya's grin brightened in the dark and suddenly Laura couldn't help smiling back just a little.

"It means sweet dreams," She said before she drank.

When Katya was finished she smacked her glass against the tabletop uncaring of the loud noise that it made. Somewhere off in the dark Blazer snorted in his sleep. Katya stood from her chair which indicated to Laura that it was time for her to do the same.

Laura quickly took her drink down in a single forced gulp. Unfortunately Katya was right. She would need the help to fall back to sleep. She rose from her seat as the liquor burned its way down her throat and warmed her chest.

Katya moved to the door and Laura followed. She was ready to leave. She wasn't sure what she thought that she would gain by coming. Perhaps she'd gained nothing but she didn't regret it. She didn't regret a moment with her child anymore.

Katya pulled the hatch open.

"I hope you sleep better, Laura," She offered as the women met Vladi in the hall.

Laura smiled sadly and nodded.

"You too," She offered, "Thank you for listening…and for the drinks, I suppose."

"Yes, Ma'am."

Laura started to turn away but she stopped herself. The sergeant's words about the liquor ran through her mind again. She knew the alcohol hadn't really burned away any fear or worry but it had made it much easier to speak candidly. She had something to tell her daughter and she was just buzzed enough to do it.

"Katya?"

"Hm?"

"I just…I feel like I need to say that…I know how hard it can be," She paused and swallowed down the last of her hesitance. "But for your own sake and maybe the sake of everyone please…don't ignore what's happening to you."

The curve of Katya's lips faltered at Laura's words and her fists clenched so tightly at her sides that she could feel her nails digging into the flesh of her palms. It wasn't because she was angry. It was because she wanted so badly to ignore it all. She so badly wished to forget. The sound of Laura's concerned warning, comprised of compassion and urgent reason rang eerily true and it scared Katya deeply.

She looked down at the metallic floor of the station's halls.

"Do you know how to swim, Laura?"

A puzzled look grew on the other woman's face.

"Swim?"

"In water," Katya added.

The strange and unnecessary clarification made Laura's brow crinkle.

"I uh…yes. Why do you ask?"

"Ellen says that when we get down to Earth she's going to take me to the beach.. One like she used to project for me…but I don't know how to swim. We have pools here on the civilian side. They're used for exercise mostly. Before my father died I had a nanny who would bring me to them sometimes but she didn't know how to swim either so she just let me splash around by the steps where it was shallow. If I go to the beach on Earth I won't even know how to swim."

Katya seemed overtired and more than a little under the influence of the several nightcaps she'd taken down. Laura didn't know how to respond to the odd rambling so she didn't. She longed to give the girl another comforting hug like they'd shared in the ward but she couldn't bring herself to do that either. Laura gave Katya a little nod hoping that she would return straight to her bed and fall fast asleep.

"Goodnight, Katya."

Regaining her composure Katya looked up at Laura and reinforced her smile.

"Porshai, mamochka."

"What's that?" Laura asked; her eyes growing heavy from the booze and lack of rest.

Katya's only answer was a chuckle under her breath and a wave goodbye.

"Porshai, Vladi," She added as she turned to close the hatch. "Home safe."

The door to the cabin closed behind her and Laura walked home at the faithful centurion's side.

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR C

MED WARD

YEAR: 2315

"You can scoot back and sit up, Kat." Tawny announced as she rolled her stool back from the exam table. "Everything looks good. Pretty much back to normal."

"Great," Katya answered in a cool flat tone. "Can I get dressed?"

Tawny ignored her rude tone and lack of patience.

"How is the soreness in your breasts?" She asked as she took her gloves off and tossed them into a nearby trash can.

Katya rolled her eyes and shrugged.

"The same. I'm getting used to it."

"Good. Do you think you'll need more of that tea from Aunt Lian?"

"Nope. Everything seems to be...working on its own now."

"What about the pump machine?"

"It hurts," Katya answered sharply. "I hate it."

Its use had become routine; sometimes before bed, sometimes in the lab or during a shift break and Katya struggled through every moment.

"But it does the job?"

"Yes."

"That's good. I know it's uncomfortable but keep it up. You'll be thankful that you did. Just remember; if you're drinking or smoking you won't be able to use…"

"I know."

"The lab will test it and they'll just toss it out. It'll be a waste."

"I know, Tawny."

"If you know then why are you hungover?" The doctor accused.

Katya sighed and dropped her knees together. She hadn't expected her post nightmare outburst at the Tigh's or Laura's midnight visit. She hadn't expected that she'd would be so in need of a drink in the middle of the night.

"You said it was fine once in awhile."

"It is but it just seems like an awful lot of work and discomfort to go through just to throw it out. Is a buzz really worth it?" Tawny challenged.

"Would you let me worry about that? I have time to make up for it. You said it yourself. It's not stopping anytime soon so what's the big deal?"

"Fine," Tawny relented. "You're right. It's your choice."

"Can I go?"

"Not just yet."

"Why?"

The doctor huffed at the persistent irritation in the captain's voice.

"Cause, I want to talk to you."

"You just said that I'm fine."

"You are. You're doing great but…you're mad at me, Kat."

"Give me my fucking pants, Tawny," Katya demanded holding out her hand expectantly.

Tawny looked over to the chair where they were folded in a neat pile.

"No. And I think those are mine by the way," She chastised looking back at Katya's vexed expression.

Katya sighed. Just like Ellen, Tawny had been trying to talk to her about Sam all week. She'd avoided the conversation easily enough. Unless they were together to discuss medical issues or lab updates Katya stayed clear of the doctor. Now Tawny had her quite literally with her pants down. She didn't appreciate it.

"I don't have time for this, Tawny," Katya said, the ire in her voice growing. "I want to get down to the lab."

Tawny crossed her arms in defiance. Usually that excuse would have worked. She understood how precious the time was that Katya and Alexi got to spend down there. Fortunately she knew better at the moment.

"The lab is closed to visitors for the next three hours for maintenance and testing analysis," She stated firmly. "Emergency situations only. I'm sure you were sent that notification."

"Fine," Katya shrugged. "I have other things to do. I have an LSO shift tonight. Just give me my clothes."

Tawny's eyes narrowed. Sam's accusations from the night before echoed in her mind. She was not afraid of this girl. Unlike most she wasn't intimidated by Katya nor was she swayed by her childish tantrums. Most times when Tawny looked at her she still saw the tiny little tagalong that she'd once been. She wasn't going to let her win this time. It wasn't in her best interest.

"Alright, how about this, Kat? I'll give you three options. You can fight me for the stupid pants, you can walk out of here half naked or you can sit with me for a minute like an adult and talk."

"It's funny how you think I won't fight you," Katya bit.

Tawny smiled slyly.

"It's funny how you forget I'm the one who taught you how to throw a punch."

They stared one another down for a useless moment before Tawny relented and sighed.

"Please, Kat, just listen to me?"

"Fine. I'm listening," Katya snapped. "Lecture me. Tell me all of the reasons why I shouldn't be mad at you. Tell me why I'm making my life harder for myself and everyone else. Go ahead and do it but do it quickly."

Tawny stood from her stool, took a step back from the exam table and nodded. She licked at her lips trying to decide how to start.

"I'm sorry that this has upset you so much. I knew that bringing Sam here would make things more stressful for you, at least at first but…"

"But you did it anyway," Katya snidely finished for her.

"Yes. Yes, Katya. I did," Tawny answered with more than a little exasperation. "I did it because it was the right thing to do!" She stopped and forced herself to lower her voice, afraid of alarming anyone beyond the curtain. "I did it because we are trying to accomplish something here and because if we don't figure out a way to do that soon we're not going to be around very much longer." Katya looked away but Tawny continued. "I love healing people but, Katya, I don't want to have to struggle to treat a dozen dying pilots at once every time a station alarm goes off. I don't want to confirm ten DOAs on top of that."

Tawny couldn't remember losing her mother but every time a pilot died under her care it was like she could feel it happening.

"It's war, Tawny," Katya shrugged. "You're a military doctor. People die."

"I want a chance to live at least part of my life without my people being at war. I want that for you, for all of us. I know that you want that too."

Katya's eyes glared back at the insistent doctor.

"And how is bringing Sam Anders to Alpha going to make that happen?" She bit.

Tawny huffed and palmed her forehead before answering.

"I don't know, Katya. I don't know if it will or if it won't. I just know that he understands something that we don't. I know that you had an awful experience during his resurrection, but he really does seem to be a good guy underneath all of his troubles."

Katya raised a wicked brow and paused.

"Oh," She remarked with a spiteful smirk. "I get it now. You're fucking him," She prodded. "Is that it?"

Tawny's eyes went wide and her face went red. Her anger and frustration surged and she decided that she just couldn't be the bigger person or the responsible role model this time.

"Kat, for once in your life would you stop being such a selfish little bitch?"

When Katya saw Tawny's eyes start to water she let her shoulders sink, slightly embarrassed that she'd actually hurt the other woman's feelings.

"Tawny, I'm sorry," She said softly. "I didn't mean…"

"Katya, getting all of these people together was the next step in figuring everything out. Ellen knew that. I just sped up the process as far as Sam was concerned. And I know that you don't want to hear this…but I brought him back for you."

"Me? I want nothing to do with that man."

"Why, Kat? Look, I know you. I've known you since the day you were born. You're not afraid of that man because he grabbed your arm and gave you a fucking bruise. You're scared of something else. I don't know what it is but I know it's there."

Katya's teeth gritted and she leaned toward Tawny in spite of her awkward placement on the exam table.

"You don't know anything about it."

Tawny met her challenge and went right back at her.

"I'll tell you what I do know, Katya. I know that your whole life you've felt like you were a mistake, like you shouldn't be here. You've tortured yourself with the knowledge that your mother's body was violated to give you life. In your darkest moments you've asked me why the universe would allow you to even exist." Tawny eased off when she saw pain flash in Katya's eyes. "I've never had an answer for you other than the fact that I loved you and that I've always been glad that you were here. I still have no other answer for you, but Kat, I think maybe…maybe Sam can tell you more."

Katya grimaced.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Tell me more about what?"

"I don't know. I really don't. I've tried to listen to him- to what he's willing to share with me. I just have a feeling that if you gave him a chance and spoke to him that maybe you would understand better than I ever could."

"Tawny why…"

"Katya, he thinks that he knows you," Tawny finally stated. There were a few muted moments between them and soon Katya looked more frightened than angry. "I don't want to say anymore because you're right; I don't know what I'm talking about, but please listen to me, Kat? You know that I love you and that I would never want to hurt you on purpose. I know that you've been going through something. Something besides the obvious, something you aren't talking about, something you won't share with any of us. Maybe you're right not to tell us. Maybe it isn't ours to know. We probably can't help or even begin to understand, but I have a feeling that maybe Sam Anders can. Just give him a chance…give yourself the chance to…"

Before Tawny could finish her cuff buzzed. With a defeated sigh she looked down to see that she had an urgent message. She was done for now anyway. She didn't know what more she could say to convince Katya. The alert on her cuff was from the civilian medical center. She frowned before opening it. When she began to read her lips parted in muted surprise.

Katya rubbed at her eyes as Tawny became distracted by whatever was on her cuff. She couldn't take hearing about Sam Anders anymore. Everything Tawny was telling her was making her sick. It was too hard block it all out when it was being shoved in her face. At least she could shut Ellen up. Tawny was relentless and some of the things that she was saying gave Katya the chills. Sam knew her? How could he know her?

Katya looked up from her lap after a moment more of silence. She saw Tawny still voraciously reading. The look on her face was strange.

"What? What is it?" She asked trying to get her friend's attention.

Tawny didn't look up. She swallowed hard before answering.

"It's the lab…It's from Dr. Diaz."

The blood drained from Katya's face and she immediately felt her stomach flip.

"What happened? Something's wrong?"

Tawny's mouth opened but she hesitated to speak before she'd finished reading the entire message from her colleague.

"Katya, they have the results back. Both sets of scans, both sets of lab workups, everything."

Katya's jaw went slack. For a moment she couldn't answer.

"Everything?" She parroted softly.

"Yeah…Katya…" Tawny's face finally broke into a broad grin. "And everything's fine."

"Are you…"

"Dr. Diaz sent me the note herself," Tawny explained excitedly cutting her off. She continued to rescan the message as she spoke. "She thought it would be best if I gave you and Lex the news. She says that she went over both sets of results twice. She linked me to the report and said that I'm welcome to look it all over but she sees no cause for extra concern."

Katya's eyes quickly watered and her voice came out as nothing but a weak whisper.

"Both?"

Tawny happily nodded.

"We still have the standard caution of regular cases and the issues that we knew about to begin with, but as far as all the rest; all the things we were so worried about…" She finally looked up at Katya with joy and tears in her eyes. "Everything is good, Kat."

Katya's mouth hung open in stunned silence as her own tears started to run. Tawny quickly rushed to embrace her as they both expressed their shared relief. All prior tension was forgotten in the moment. When the doctor felt Katya truly start to cry against her lab coat she hugged her even tighter. They had been waiting for weeks. The constant feeling of fear, anticipation and worry had started to feel almost normal. With the weight lifted they could actually feel just how much the pressure had been weighing on them but now it was agone

"It's okay, Kat. Everything is good. It's all fine," Tawny repeated in a calming tone.

Katya gulped hard and leaned back suddenly overcome with a new rush of adrenaline.

"I need to find Alexi. I want to get down there."

Tawny stepped back and nodded in a hurry.

"Go. Go, sweetie," She said as she leaned to grab Katya's pile of clothes.

"Here get dressed. Keep the pants," She teased with a little laugh.

Katya grabbed them and smiled through a steady stream of tears.

"Tawny, I don't know how I'm ever going to thank you for everything."

The doctor shook her head. There wasn't any need for thanks. She'd done her job as a physician and a member of her family.

"Don't. Don't thank me. I'm so happy for you, Kat. I wanted this for you so much. I'm just so thankful for the way things have turned out."

"They wouldn't have turned out this way if it wasn't for you," Katya told her as she reached out for her hand. "I love you, Tawny."

The sincerity and devotion in Katya's voice was the reason Tawny had always been able to put up with her less than gracious moments. It was why she cared so deeply for her, why she considered Katya to be her sister for better or worse.

"I love you too, Kat." Tawny squeezed Katya's hand before helping her to scoot off of the table. "There's still a long way to go but this changes everything."

Katya nodded, hurrying into her underwear and pants with almost frantic determination.

"I have to tell Lex," She said as another rush of emotions flooded through her. She could feel her blood pounding in her ears and her heart beating gladly in her chest. Most of all she could feel one of the many burdens that she carried on her shoulders being lifted. "Maybe I should have him meet me down there."

Tawny nodded in eager agreement before suddenly remembering the laboratory hours.

"Oh, shit. Kat, I forgot. The lab is still closed. Diaz may be in there working with her staff but it's closed to visitors for a little longer," She regrettably reminded while checking her cuff for the staff schedule. "You two can go this evening but they probably won't let you in now."

"Damn it. I have a shift tonight."

"It's okay. Just take a breath and let it sink in," Tawny suggested in a low and calming tone. "Go tell Lex. I'll get you both off duty tonight somehow. I promise. Doctor's notes work wonders. Kaplan can't question me and besides, you know he'll understand. He's going to be so happy for you. Go home and celebrate if you want. After today's exam I'm giving you and Lex the official green light. Though I doubt you've been listening to me anyway," She added with a wink and a roll of her eyes. "The lab will be open in a few hours and then you can go together. Call me when you do head over. I'm anxious to check in myself."

Katya nodded and fastened her belt.

"I will, Tawny," She promised as she gave the woman another tight hug.

She turned to make her way out of the curtain. She was almost through when Tawny called for her again.

"Kat?"

"Yeah?" She said looking back and letting the curtain swing closed again.

Tawny bit her lip.

"Just…I know that you're excited, but don't forget what we talked about. This is amazing news but you know that none of it will matter if our civilization can't find a way out of this. We brought these people back from the dead to help us but I think we need to start helping them before that can happen. I know that you want a peaceful future for your family. Take a step in the right direction."

Tawny couldn't asses the look on Katya's face as she stared back at her. Before she could say anything else Katya had turned on her heels and left the exam room.

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 172B: ASSIGNMENT; BIERS

YEAR: 2315

"Well there's a face I thought I'd left behind millennia ago."

D'Anna stood in the doorframe of her cabin, arms crossed as she looked over Laura Roslin head to toe.

"Is this a bad time, D'Anna?"

Laura's attempt at manners caused D'Anna to snicker.

"A bad time for what? I just exist here now. Did you think I had plans?"

As rude and curt as D'Anna was Laura could understand the other woman's frustrations. Before she'd found a way to keep busy aboard Alpha she often felt as if she was merely existing as well.

"I was hoping that we could talk."

D'Anna's eyes grew in size as did her less than genuine smile.

"You know the last time you and I had a one on one I don't remember it going very well."

The memory of their basestar meeting wasn't a fond one for either of them.

"D'Anna, please?" Laura appealed humbly. "Ellen went through all of the trouble to get us onto one station. I really don't think we should be isolating ourselves."

D'Anna heard the former Colonial president's words but her attentions were suddenly distracted by the site over Roslin's shoulder. Behind her stood a centurion; one D'Anna found quite intriguing. As his eye swept back and forth she could feel a strong protective sense emanating from the machine. The odd thing was, it wasn't being protective over her, it's concern was for Laura Roslin.

"What the hell is this?" D'Anna asked, nodding in Vladi's direction.

"Oh," Laura said as if she'd forgotten the hulking being was there. "This is part of my security detail. He um…" She faltered for a moment. Laura almost stopped herself but it occurred to her that continuing would be to her benefit despite the bit pride she might lose. "When he heard that I was coming to see you he wanted to bring you something," Laura explained sheepishly.

Utter amusement grew over D'Anna's features. Not just over the strangely empathic cylon but over the way Roslin seemed to speak of it.

"You don't say?" D'Anna mockingly marveled.

Laura turned to Vladi as if to tell him it was alright. He quickly extended his arm and opened his spindly fist to reveal a ripe red Beta apple.

D'Anna's jaw nearly dropped. After a moment of surprise she took the fruit. She silently thanked the machine, wondering if Roslin could sense their communication. Ellen had mentioned something about Laura's DNA being altered because of Hera. It made sense but to actually see and feel Roslin's connection with what she'd once hatefully called a toaster was both astonishing and hilarious to the Three.

"I used to have to order these things to bring me my lunch," She mused.

"Vladi likes to give gifts," Laura added in a low voice.

"It has a name?"

D'Anna snorted and shook her head at the scene.

"May I please come in, D'Anna?" Laura asked again.

Finally the cylon woman nodded.

"C'mon," She said as she palmed the apple and turned back into the cabin. "But leave your metal frakking puppy dog outside."

Once inside the cabin D'Anna set aside Vladi's apple and turned to face Laura once again.

"You look different," She observed. "Healthy. Vibrant, even. Last time I saw you, you had one sensible pump in the grave."

Laura just nodded.

"Well sit then, I suppose," D'anna said, gesturing to the sofa.

As Laura took her seat on the couch D'Anna casually draped herself over the arm of a nearby chair. She couldn't help observing the strange cylon woman. D'Anna had always been a bit odd. Her model had been hard to pin down especially when her motives seemed to become muddled and drifted from the others. There was a reason her own kind had found it fit to box her line. Peculiarity aside, Laura was sure that she was picking up on more than just the oddness of a past life. D'Anna had an obvious finesse about her; even a sense of humor, but something about it was unsettling. She didn't seem to have the social skills that the others had or perhaps, Laura considered, she just didn't care to have them. There was something so different about the Three when compared to Ellen or Sharon. Laura couldn't tell if D'Anna wasn't offering her a drink out of old spite or a lack of humanity. Her demeanor almost echoed the mechanical nature of her centurion relatives, though Laura mused that even Vladi would have offered her something to make her feel welcome.

"So what is it that you want to talk about?" D'Anna said, clasping her hands together. "I should tell you that if you're looking to me for the answer as to why we're all here I don't have it as I've told Ellen, the Colonel and my sister."

Laura squinted and tilted her head in thought.

"You still call Sharon your sister," She observed.

"That's what she is. Her being a traitor didn't change that. Neither did more than two hundred thousand years," D'Anna stated with a shrug. "So how can I help you?"

"I'm hoping that we might be able to help each other."

D'Anna shook her head and laughed.

"I believe those words sound damn familiar coming from you."

"That's not what I meant," Laura firmly defended. She was aware of her lousy track record with keeping her word in D'Anna's eyes. No sooner had the Three been unboxed did Laura then renege on their agreed to terms aboard the cylon ship. Lucky for D'Anna she had collateral back then. "It's not like that," Laura offered in a softer tone. "Not this time. Now we're both on the same side. Now there is no motivation for selfish agendas. We're both in the same boat."

"I just told you; I haven't the foggiest idea of what we're to do next," D'Anna groused.

Laura felt herself losing her patience but she gathered her composure. D'Anna had been brought back just like she had. She'd been confronted with the very same reality. She deserved some tolerance.

"That isn't why I came," Laura explained. "I mean, part of it is. I do want us to figure this out. I really think that we should all be spending some measure of time together. I just…there is something else I've wanted to ask you since your resurrection."

D'Anna's interested was reluctantly peeked.

"And that is?"

"About Margot," Laura answered. "About your daughter."

D'Anna leaned back in her chair. Her lips lost their ever antagonistic curve and her eyes went to her lap. Laura observed the first hint of true humanity in the woman since she'd opened the door and she went for it.

"I was there, D'Anna. I saw your reaction when you first laid eyes on her. You knew who she was. Didn't you?"

D'Anna looked back at Laura for a long silent moment.

"You've got one too, I hear," She said, her smirk perking up again, though it lacked its usual impish vigor. "You and that old goat," She teased. "I hear she's newly married to the son of Gaius Baltar…and a Six to top it off," D'Anna taunted with a raised brow and an amused expression. "I've seen him. He stood guard a few days ago just outside my door. Strapping young man. He's his mother's son, that's for sure. Your daughter marrying a half cylon; the son of a man you despised and the woman who essentially destroyed your entire home civilization. It must kill you."

Though D'Anna seemed to lack some key aspects of human nature and emotion she sure knew how to manipulate them in others. Laura tried not to react to her obvious goading.

"The sergeant is his own person. I try not to judge him on his parentage."

"Your daughter doesn't favor you very strongly," D'Anna keenly observed, "Or the Admiral for that matter. Not obviously, at least. I've only seen images of her. I can tell well enough now that I know who she belongs to, but I wouldn't have guessed."

Laura gave her a slight nod.

"Margot on the other hand…" She tested, "is your spitting image, D'Anna."

The mention of the girls name seemed to make D'Anna's lips quiver ever so slightly.

"Unlike the sergeant it must be hard for you not to judge her when all you see is my face," She posed.

Laura shook her head.

"Not as hard as you might think. Surprisingly she's a very pleasant young officer."

D'Anna frowned as if it pained her to hear it.

"What is it that you want from me?"

Laura scooted forward on the cushion and did her best to regain the other woman's focus.

"D'Anna, I just want to know what you remember from before you were brought here. I want to know what you remember from the other side. I can't remember where we were taken from. I remember feelings. I remember the peace and the comfort, but everything else faded so quickly. I sometimes wonder if I knew about my daughter before resurrecting. Sometimes I feel like I may have. Did you know about Margot?"

D'Anna shook her head.

"I can't tell you that."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't know."

Laura didn't want to believe her. She was so sure that D'Anna would have some insight for her. Perhaps some little notion of where they'd been and if they'd watched over their children from birth. Though Laura knew it might not bring back her own memories it would have consoled her to know in some way she'd watched Katya grow up.

"D'Anna, please. Helo and Sharon heard you at the download. You told Margot that you had been waiting to meet her for a long time. How could that be your first reaction to her if you didn't have some kind of previous knowledge of her existence?"

"Look, I can't explain it any better than you can," D'Anna snapped. "I remember saying that to her. It's true but I didn't know who or what she was. I just said it because I felt it. I felt that somehow I'd been waiting for her and that she'd been waiting for me. You said it yourself; it all faded so quickly. I know only one thing about before. I existed where God exists…and now I'm here."

Laura sighed and licked her lips.

"Do you believe that you knew of her before? Maybe we just couldn't take our memories with us into this existence."

D'Anna shrugged at the conjecture.

"I don't think it much matters. I'm here now."

Laura resigned herself to the fact that D'Anna just didn't know. She had no reason to lie, no hidden agendas. She'd been brought back just like there rest of them. Laura looked down at her lap in thought. D'Anna deserved her empathy.

"I know what a shock it must have been to learn how your daughter was created," She offered.

"Maybe for you," D'Anna scoffed. "Her conception and creation was far more natural than anything I lived with before."

Laura almost cringed at the thought.

"Still, D'Anna, you can't be comfortable with what was done to you. You do understand the reality of what was done to you, don't you?"

D'Anna shot of her seat catching Laura off guard and causing her to jump in shock.
"I understand that I was unwillingly impregnated by the cloned body of one of my own creators," She spat. "How's that for reality? The father of my child is a man who helped to make me. A man who; by all accounts is out of his mind right now and refuses to acknowledge that our child as his daughter. Your child was fathered by the man you love. Perhaps it's you who doesn't understand what was done."

Laura felt herself go pale at the rawness of what D'Anna had just laid out. It didn't make her own situation any more bearable. It just made her stomach turn and her heart go out to the peculiar woman in front of her.

"None of it was fair, D'Anna," Laura said in a small voice.

D'Anna started to pace in front of her seat.

"I can be angry and disgusted and take the more primitive approach or I can think of the pure cylon child that was made, the daughter that this body conceived with one of the Final Five and I can find peace in her existence. The depravity of how she came to be, of what that cold woman Le Blanc did to me…well…I'll blame that on the human influence within this strange new people that our races joined to create."

"That's funny," Laura challenged. "I was about to say the opposite."

D'Anna stopped her treading and gave a bitter smirk.

"Well perhaps there's unfortunate truth in both of our theories." She was surprised when Laura actually nodded in concession. "Do you know that our children are seen as scientific abominations here in this world?"

"Yes," Laura regrettably acknowledged.

"Failed projects meant to replace us, unfortunate mistakes. That's how these people see our children. They might pretend to accept them as their own, take advantage of their loyalty and service, but all four are seen as aberrations. That's the last thing I see when I look at my daughter." D'Anna's words suddenly had passion behind them. Her cold robotic nature was lost as she spoke of her newly found offspring. "I can sense something in her. These children aren't mistakes. They're gifts. Angels sent from God to meet us here."

The intensity of D'Anna's description made Laura flinch. She hadn't expected it and she didn't know how to take it. It had echoes of grandeur and Laura couldn't tell if D'Anna's theory was based on faith, hope or her own inflated sense of importance. She knew Saul's theory of how the Three was different; how she had visions, how she saw things the rest didn't. Laura's first reaction was to scoff at it, until she realized that her own people had described her in much the same way once upon a time.

"May I ask what makes you say that?"

D'Anna shrugged and smiled.

"Don't you feel that your daughter is a gift?"

Laura immediately lost her words. She didn't know what to say. All she knew was that she felt awful for not agreeing right away. She swallowed down her guilt and went on.

"Did Margot say something to make you feel like she was…special in some way?"

D'Anna looked puzzled at the question and suddenly Laura felt an old but familiar rush of embarrassment. She'd done this once before to another mother. She'd seen the same look of bewilderment in Caprica's eyes back in the halls of Galactica. She'd asked the Six if she felt that her unborn son was important. The way the expectant mother had looked at her made Laura feel more foolish than she ever had before. The look the cylon women had given her was a look of disturbance mixed with pity for her lack of understanding. Laura had immediately apologized to Caprica Six, though she doubted it had done much good. Inconsequential as the interaction was was, Laura had lived the rest of her dwindling days on Galactica wishing that she could have taken the question back.

"She didn't have to say anything," D'Anna insisted. She took her seat again and rested her elbows on her knees. "Besides, she's not saying much to me at all anymore."

The sound in her voice made Laura pause. She and Bill had been suspicious as to what had gone on during the Three's stay with Margot aboard the cylon ship.

"D'Anna, what happened on the basestar?"

D'Anna looked away.

"The girl hates me," She admitted in a steady tone as if she was deliberately trying to hide her emotion. It wasn't working. Laura could sense it anyway. "She doesn't want to see me. There isn't much more to it."

"D'Anna, I…"

"You know, when I understood fully who Margot was it made it so much easier to know that I had left paradise," D'Anna recalled. "Now I can't even see her face."

Laura couldn't help that her heart began to ache for the woman she faced.

"D'Anna, I'm sure that I'm the last person you would ever consider taking advice from, but I have to tell you not to give up on that girl. Not ever. Margot is yours. Katya is a complicated young woman. I'm not sure that I'll ever understand her…In my last life I never wanted to be a mother, but now that I met Katya in this life I want to be her mother. I know now that I'd rather live in this world that is full of pain and unrest than to know another life that she didn't exist in. I'd rather be here struggling to love my child than to go back to paradise without her. Does that make sense?"

Laura waited half hoping that she would get some kind of response and half hoping that D'Anna wouldn't have a reply at all.

"Oddly," D'Anna said with a tilt of her head, "yes."

Laura looked down and nodded quietly.

"That's all I wanted to say."

They sat for a moment until Laura could feel D'Anna's eyes on her.

"Ellen speaks of your daughter as if she's her own."

"I know that."

"She and the Colonel."

"Yes."

"They gave your daughter a loving home. Two parents. They looked after those hafling boys too, at least to some degree," D'Anna added, "But they left my child to be raised by a stranger, by someone who couldn't give her a fraction of what they could."

There was some resentment in D'Anna's voice now and for some reason Laura felt the need to come to the Tigh's defense.

"Katya and the boys were orphaned. Margot has an adoptive mother who is still alive and well. I won't pretend to like Michelle Le Blanc, but she seems to have raised a fine young woman. Ellen must have seen that Margot was in capable hands. Taking her at six years old would have meant tearing a little girl from the only mother and the only home she'd ever known."

"She would have been better off with them," D'Anna argued.

Laura rubbed her forehead and let out a long breath.

"Have you met my daughter, D'Anna?"

The other woman shook her head.

For a moment Laura almost let out an acerbic laugh. Margot was so polite, sweet and usually mild mannered from what she knew of her. Laura musingly wondered if actually encountering Katya would change D'Anna's tune about the Tigh's being the better option. Saul's temper and Ellen's brashness had rubbed off on the girl they raised in a big way. For a moment Laura considered that seeing that might help D'Anna appreciate Margot's upbringing. Rationally she had a feeling that it wouldn't. D'Anna had obviously already heard the way Saul and Ellen spoke of their adoptive child. That was all it took to understand how much Katya was loved and that was all D'Anna wanted for her own daughter. Laura could understand that.

"D'Anna, Ellen loves all four of them. You don't have any reason to believe me but I'm certain that once she knew of their existence no harm ever came to any them. Not if she could help it. The same goes for Saul."

D'Anna didn't have much of a reaction but she didn't challenge Laura's theory any further.

"Ellen tells me that our daughters are friends."

"Yes. They are. Very good friends."

"Don't you find that funny?"

"I suppose considering the past it should seem unlikely. It doesn't seem as strange once you see the girls together. You'll see what I mean one day," Laura added. When D'Anna shrugged her shoulders Laura frowned. "You want to…don't you, D'Anna? To see your daughter live out as much of her life as she can? She's only twenty one years old. She's just become a legal adult. There's so much she has yet to experience. These kids are so young. They've only started to learn who they are. They deserve to live a life in peace without the constant fear of death that you and I lived with. Please don't tell me that you're withholding anything just so that this ends faster. Please don't tell me that you would sabotage another civilization to get back to the other side. This isn't for us."

D'Anna rested her chin on her hand.

"You know at one point after leaving the basestar and coming here I considered that this situation was hopeless. I thought that perhaps God had sent us here to see the end of this civilization, to retrieve our stolen children and to take them back to paradise with us. Maybe that is the case…but when I look at Margot I feel that there is more to be done before that happens. I think she and her counterparts have just as much purpose as we do. God put them here. They were not born in vain, Laura. I don't have to be some kind of frakking oracle to know that."

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

Katya ran out of Med Ward without looking where she was going. People ducked out of her way as she jogged while sending a hurried message to her husband on her cuff. She couldn't tell him over a message. She wanted to see his face. She wanted to experience the relief and happiness with him. Her message told him that he needed to get home quickly so they could talk. She was sure he was alarmed but she wanted him to get there as fast as he could. His return reply promised he would get his shift covered and be there at the cabin no time. She almost slammed into a door while reading it.

Katya jogged the whole way. She didn't want Alexi waiting if he happened to beat her home. She didn't want to waste a single moment. At some point she realized that she was running with a smile. When she turned into the B corridor a familiar face greeted her from a few yards down the hall.

Bill grinned as he saw the young woman jogging toward him. They hadn't seen much of one another over the past week. With his shifts being cut after the ambush he missed the time they spent working in the control room together. He hoped that his upcoming scheduled shift meant Kaplan was comfortable with him returning to duty. With Saul injured Bill figured that they could use the extra authoritative figure. When he was in the control room he felt more at home. Sometimes he even felt like he was back on Galactica. In his uniform he could almost see himself within the halls of his own ship.

Bill smiled at the captain as she jogged toward him. She smiled back but seemed to be in a hurry. He decided not to stop her.

"What do ya hear?" Bill called out as she jogged closer.

"Nothing but the rain," She answered with a wry grin and a wink.

"Then grab your gun and brin…"

Bill trailed off as his own words suddenly registered. He grimaced in mild confusion before refocusing on the captain who had slowed her pace and developed quite a distraught demeanor. Her face was pale and her eyes troubled.

Katya didn't know what she'd just said or why she'd said it. It had just come out as naturally as anything. She suddenly had a sick and eerie feeling overcome her. A look back at Bill showed that he was just as unnerved. She couldn't stop to address whatever the hell had just happened. She wanted to get as far away from it as possible. She felt like she was struggling to run out of a fog. She just wanted to get to Alexi. She picked up her speed and ran straight past Bill. She gave him a look of worried apology over her shoulder and kept going.

Bill stopped in his tracks. He turned and watched as Katya continued her race down the corridor. His ears started to buzz and his head felt fuzzy. He didn't know what to make of what had just occurred. Katya had looked almost frightened and he couldn't tell what it was that he was feeling. When he couldn't see her running anymore he forced himself to shake off the strange moment. Saul came to mind. He must have told her. It made sense. With a deep breath Bill turned and went to report to his shift.

Around the corner Katya felt tears burning in her eyes as she ran down the final hallway. This time they weren't tears of relief and joy. They were made from pure confusion and fear. She could feel that her face was red from running and crying. Her cheeks stung against the brisk station air as she charged forward. Her vision was bleary and she would have missed the hatch of her own cabin had she not run directly into her husband's solid chest.

Katya yelped in surprise before finally realizing who she'd bumped into. When she did she hugged on to him for dear life.

"Katya," Alexi said in alarm, "Katya, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," She mumbled, into his chest, "Nothing. Nothing."

Alexi gripped her arms and pushed her back so that he could see her face.

"Katya, look at me. What's going on? Schtoh sluchilys? What's wrong?"

She shook her head still trying to clear away the memory of Bill's voice, his face, the familiar automatic banter. For a moment the interaction with her father had felt so natural and so common. A moment later it felt alien and ominous. She couldn't explain it to herself. She wouldn't even begin to try to explain it to Alexi. She felt like she was losing her mind.

"Yekaterina!" He barked, shaking her a bit at the shoulders, "What's going on?"

She had to snap out of it. She had to force herself back into her own space. She was with her husband, in front of their home and she had something important to tell him.

"Nothing is wrong, Alexi. Nothing. I'm just…I'm still in shock. I ran here. I'm not in the shape I was a few months ago."

He looked at her skeptically. She'd been getting her strength back just fine. Something was up. A jog around the station shouldn't have winded her to the point of tears.

"Katya, please. In shock? You called me off duty in the middle of a shift. You've been crying. You look like you've just seen death itself. What's wrong, myshka?"

She shook her head and took a deep breath.

"Nothing, malysh. I'm so sorry I scared you. Let's go inside, lubuv moya. I have news to share."

As they entered Alexi couldn't suppress his frustration. He slammed the hatch behind them causing Katya to cringe.

"Kat, you better be telling me the truth! I'm so sick of these evasions and vague explanations. I don't know what's going on with you but this has to stop!"

"Damn it! Alexi zatknis'! Zakroi rot! Just stop it and let me speak! I have something to tell you if you would listen!"

The sergeant bit his tongue and forced his temper down.

"Prastinitye, Katya. Go on. Speak then."

"Look, I really didn't mean to worry you but I had to get you down here. I wanted to tell you in person. I guess I got a little excited and overwhelmed. I rushed here and I got emotional on the way."

"Katya…"

"You know I had another follow up with Tawny this morning."

"Dah."

"While I was there she got a message from the lab, from Dr. Diaz." Katya watched Alexi's eyes grow wide in alarm. "Alexi, Dr. Diaz told her that everything is fine. The message said that they were finally able to run the last of the tests. She went over the results for both sets of scans and she said that everything looked perfectly fine. Both of them. It's okay, Lex. Everything is fine."

Katya thought she saw Alexi's bottom lip tremble a bit before he was able to speak.

"They're sure?"

"Yes."

"Absolutely positive?" He tested.

"Yes, Lex," She assured as her smile grew again. "I mean we still have the same concerns and worries as any other case. We aren't out of the woods. There are still the issues that we've known of since the start, but all of the awful horrible fears we had over the rest…we can let that all go."

Alexi grabbed Katya and gave her an almost bruising kiss. When he let her go he shook his head in slight disbelief.

"I don't think I've ever been this happy, myshka."

"Me either," Katya agreed as she leaned in for another hug.

Alexi squeezed her body tightly as he spoke into her ear.

"That night that Tawny had you rushed to the civilian ward I'd never been so terrified. Not even during times when I've had bullets flying over my head. I was so afraid. You were so strong but I felt helpless. Later when Tawny took me to the lab for the first time without you…I thought my heart was going to stop. Then waiting back with you in your room…" Alexi stopped and swallowed hard before going on. "That night was the longest of my life but...when we had to leave...I think that was the absolute worst. The fear hasn't gone away since. Until now."

"I can't believe it," Katya said softly shrugging in his arms.

Alexi leaned back with sudden excitement and took her by her wrist.

"Let's get down there. C'mon."

Katya almost followed but tugged him back as she remembered the lab hours.

"Oh, wait, Lex. We can't."

"Why not?"

"I forgot. The lab is closed for maintenance and test analysis or some bullshit. I don't know, but we have another couple of hours before they'll let us in."

"Won't they make an exception?"

Alexi was disappointed in the worst way and his broad shoulders sunk making him look somehow smaller and deflated.

"Tawny said not unless it's an emergency. And thankfully it isn't. Thankfully we can finally take a breath and believe that there is a real chance that everything is going to turn out okay."

Alexi briefly considered hauling down to the civilian medical center and demanding access to the lab. He quickly decided against it. Katya was right. They finally had a moment to breathe.

"I love you, Yekaterina," He said embracing her once again. "You've made me very happy."

"Ya tebya lyublyu, malysh. You've made me happier than I thought I could be. Oh, and there is something else. Tawny gave me the okay to uh, celebrate. I mean really. No more acting like teenagers trying every which way not to do the real deal."

Though Alexi had been patient and understanding over the last few weeks the news was more than welcome.

"You've been very creative, Captain."

Katya rolled her eyes.

"I could say the same for you, Sergeant. But the wait is over, so until we can make our way to the lab I say we take the doctor's suggestion and celebrate."

"There isn't anything else in the universe that could distract me for the next two hours."

Alexi kissed her, lightly sucking in her bottom lip but Katya couldn't help her smile. She grinned against his mouth until he broke the kiss with a little chuckle.

"You know, Lex, now we can tell my parents. I know that Ellen's going to be mad at first, but she won't possibly be able to stay angry."

Alexi nodded and kissed her forehead.

"Tomorrow is New Year's Eve. On New Year's Day we'll be celebrating as a family. Ellen always has a holiday dinner at the cabin. We can tell them then. Dah?" He suggested, keeping a steady grip at her elbows. "The gift giving has gone by the wayside this holiday season. Everyone's been so distracted and afraid of what's happened and what's coming next. This will be like our gift to them. We can bring some measure of happiness, some hope for the future."

"I like that," Katya smiled.

Alexi leaned in to kiss her again.

Katya was impetuous and insistent as she pressed herself against him. Though they hadn't exactly avoided sensual contact over the last few weeks they hadn't truly been together since their time on Delta Station and Alexi didn't need much in the way of encouragement. He picked Katya up in one fluid movement. When she wrapped her legs around his hips he whispered in her ear.

"Myshka lyublyu tebya vsem sertsem, vs'ey dushOyu. I love you with everything I have."

"Show me, malysh," She coaxed.

In what seemed like less than a blink they were on their rack nearly undressed; cotton and lace, boots and holsters carelessly tossed to the cabin floor.

Katya pulled back from their frantic kissing and stopped Alexi's hand as it traveled up her ribcage.

"Malysh? Will you promise me something?"

"Mm?"

"Promise you won't hold back?"

Alexi had been tentative and unsure with the last time they really made love, but he no longer had cause for worry. This time Katya's request only fanned the flame of his desire. His eyes promised her that and more as his hands went to lift her hips.

Katya's heart nearly sunk when Alexi suddenly paused. A contemplative look grew on his usually impassive face.

"Lex, what's wrong?"

He furrowed his brow in thought fighting the urge to move on. He softly dropped her hips and leaned over her body so that he was close to her ear.

"Katya, I was just thinking…what do you suppose the chances are that…"

She quickly started to shake her head, cutting him off before he had a chance to finish his thought.

"None, Alexi," She said cupping his cheek. "None. It shouldn't have even happened before. We've been told a hundred times over."

He bit his lip and nodded. She was right.

Once Alexi's hands resumed their exploration Katya became even more aggressive. She clung to him, pulled him close, and dug her fingers into his heated flesh. Every movement was deliberate. It had to be that way. She needed to stay in the moment. She needed her body and her mind to be there with him. She needed to remember who she was, who she loved and all that her life encompassed.

When she noticed Alexi was avoiding her breasts she palmed the back of his head urged his mouth to her chest. He paused for only the briefest of moments. She allowed him his hesitation knowing that he would keep his promise to her. Though she was sore his lips and tongue soothed her flesh. His warm fingers kneaded away the deep ache as his suckling relieved the gnawing pressure. The sweet discomfort was exactly what Katya was looking for. It reminded of her of what they had done together. It reminded her of the present and what was most important to them. She was too afraid to let Alexi read her. She was so afraid of what might come through besides her appreciation and love for him. She didn't trust herself. Instead she verbally thanked him over and over, murmuring her words into his hairline.

"Spasibo, malysh. Spasibo, pasiki. Pozhaluysta, ne ostanavlivaysya ."

He gave her all that she asked for and then some. They released the weeks of frustration and fear and they reminded each other of the deep and unconditional love they had been so lucky to find together. They didn't stop until their bodies gave out. They hadn't meant to fall to sleep wrapped up in a knot of limbs and bed sheets but they'd exhausted themselves.

Alexi slept soundly. He was more at ease than he had been in months but though Katya's body lay dormant and resting beside him sleep had brought her nothing but turmoil. It had brought back everything she'd just so desperately tried to keep away.

Her dreams were choppy and fleeting; no one image lasted long enough to accept before the next took its place.

She dreamed of a life that she never knew and yet she recognized it all. She was home. Not her home but home; a planet with blue skies and grass on the ground. She saw him first in the courtyard of a dilapidated building. It was being used as a camp, as some sort of a fort for vigilante fighters; civilians turned into warriors. It was the resistance and Sam was their leader. She dreamed of saying goodbye to him, thinking for the first time that she would never see his face again. She handed him her dogtags and made him a promise.

There wasn't any space between one dream and the next. Soon she was somewhere desolate. Somewhere far from home. It was another planet but this one lacked both the greenery and the familiar feeling. There was mud under her feet but she didn't care. Sam was by her side again. On a clear morning she faced him with her father by her side; not Isakoff, not Saul Tigh, but Bill Adama and he gave her away to be married.

In an instant the scene changed and she and Sam were in a stuffy tent. He sat on a stool nearby and just chuckled at her with his bicep bandaged. She could hear the humming vibration before she felt the needle on her arm; the place where she'd proudly worn the wing that marked her as his forever.

Soon the humming sound of the artist's needle was replaced by the more familiar hum of a ship. This time she knew she wasn't on any terrestrial surface. She knew the constant whirring drone of spacecraft well. Sam was still by her side but he wasn't laughing or smiling anymore. He lay in a cylon tub, his eyes vacant and wild at the same time. He looked sick, hurt and hardly human. His head was shaved clean and his skin was clammy and pale. They weren't happy any longer and once more she had the feeling that she would never see his face again. She took the same tags from her neck that she'd once given him as a promise and she dropped them into the cylon fluid that surrounded his body as she kissed him goodbye for what she thought would be the last time.

Her eyes suddenly flashed with the burning glow of the sun.

"Sam!"

Katya's shouting made Alexi shoot up out of a deep sleep. It took him a moment to realize what she'd just called out but soon enough she mumbled it through her tears again. Alexi was used to her calls for Husker and Helo, strange as they were, but this was too much.

"Yekaterina, wake up! Pod'yom!" He barked rather harshly.

This time he didn't have the patience to gently rouse her from her nightmare.

"Now, Katya!" He shouted as he threw his legs over the side of the bed and stood up. He looked down at her as she struggled to wake, still mumbling the other man's name. "Yekaterina!"

When Katya finally opened her eyes she saw Alexi staring at her with fiery anger..

Her chest was heaving and the sheets were damp and stuck to her body. She squinted and shook her head for a moment trying to jar her mind back into place. She remembered that she was home on Alpha Station in her cabin with her husband. She remembered what she had just been dreaming and then she remembered what and who she'd been dreaming of. The look in Alexi's eyes quickly told her that somehow he knew too. She couldn't speak. Her mouth was dry and Alexi's usual offer of soothing sips of water after a nightmare looked to be the last thing on his mind.

"Lex…"

"Katya, I won't let this go on any longer," He said through his gritted jaw. "You can block me from reading you, you can lie to me and hide things all you want. I still see that something isn't right!" The volume of his voice made her jump. "For weeks I haven't gone a day without hearing that some strange man is begging to see my wife. Now you're shouting his name in our bed!?"

"Lex, it wasn't like that. I don't know what…"

"It doesn't matter, Yekaterina! Whatever it is, it's changed you. Whatever it may be, it's driving you mad and I can't sit by your side and watch you allow it to happen. Why are you still having nightmares? We just got the best news we could have hoped for and it didn't calm you worth a damn!"

"Alexi, it did. I'm relieved over the news but it doesn't solve all of our problems!"

"You told me that you were happy, Katya! You aren't! I can sense it no matter how much you try to shut me out. You're so worried that there won't be a future that you aren't focusing on what our lives are going to be like if there is! Things are changing for us, Kat! Your mind should be focused on that. Not whatever the hell it is that you're dreaming of! Not some man, some stranger!"

"Alexi, prosti , detka, ya ne khotel vas obidet! I can't control these dreams. I don't know where they come from. I don't know why they are happening. You have to believe me. Listen to me!"

"No, Katya. You listen to me. Before you get back in this bed you go see that man and you settle whatever it is that's making you fear him, whatever it is that's causing you to dream of him. Do it soon because I'm not spending another night with you until you do. I've been patient. I've tried to help but you won't let me so do it yourself! Now get dressed and compose yourself. We have someplace to be. The lab should be opened. Maybe some time there will remind you of where your mind should be."

"Alexi, you know how worried I've been for months! You know how afraid I've been. I was so grateful to hear the news today. You're acting as if I don't care!"

"I know that you care, Yekaterina! I know it…I know that there hasn't been a day in months that this hasn't consumed your waking thoughts…but for the life of me, I don't know what's taking over when you sleep."

She couldn't respond and Alexi shook his head in bitter disappointment.

"Let's go, Katya. We have precious little time there."

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 119B: ASSIGNMENT; TIGH

YEAR: 2315

"I thought you were on duty," Saul greeted as he let Bill through the hatch.

He'd been napping when his old friend awoke him with a few forceful knocks.

"I was. It's quiet out there so Kaplan let me go."

It was a lie. The Commander thought that Bill seemed distracted. Less than an hour into his shift Kaplan dismissed him suggesting that he take the rest of the day to compose himself.

"Quiet?" Saul said with a grunt. "The calm before another shit storm?"

"I hope not. We're getting a lot of interference from the satellite feeds. We can't see what they're doing down on the surface worth a damn. You can tell it's intentional too. Most feeds are clear. Only known bot bases and hubs are distorted."

"Not good," Saul groaned. "They didn't use to give a frak what we saw them doing."

"Makes you think they're up to something, doesn't it?"

"Sure does. Well, come on in while we still have time to sit," The Colonel offered with a wave of his hand.

"Ellen home?" Bill asked as he looked around the Tigh cabin.

"Na. She's probably putting out one fire or another…or starting one," Saul mused. "Drink?"

Bill glanced at Tigh's shoulder. His arm still rested in a sling.

"I'll get it," He offered. "You sit." He went to the drink cart as Saul took a seat on the sofa. "How's the arm?"

"It hurts like hell," Saul sighed as he sat. "But it's nothing I can't handle. Being a P.O.W will give you a certain pain threshold."

Bill cringed as he poured their drinks. Even after an eternity the thought of Saul and Laura being held in containment on New Caprica still made his stomach turn. He swallowed down the old memory and brought his friend a drink.

"And uh, you and Katya?" Bill asked, handing Saul a glass and taking a seat nearby.

Saul took a sip and savored it. Ellen had been doing her best to limit his alcohol intake while he was still nursing his injuries.

"She's still angry at me. She's still confused. She doesn't really understand," He said thoughtfully before he paused. "But she knows that Ellen and I love her and she knows that we love each other. That's been enough to hold us together through this. She's trying to forgive me. Poor kid. She forces herself to come here and check up on me, help me with a dozen things that I don't need help with. She looks at me and I can tell that she doesn't know whether to slug me or hug me."

Bill gave him a small understanding smile.

"I spent a lot of time being looked at by Lee in a similar way."

"It's rough. I don't mind admitting that. Kat's my princess, as soft and sappy as it sounds. Now I feel like she sees a monster in me that she never knew was there."

Bill nodded. It was hard to hear Saul question himself as a father. A look around the Tigh's quarters showed how tight-knit the little makeshift family had been over the years. The photos proudly displayed on the image walls were all of Katya. There were quite a few childhood photos, some of her dancing, a few family shots from her flight academy graduation and what looked like one from her wedding. As far as Bill was concerned Saul had done better as a father than he ever imagined he could.

"Saul, the very fact that she's trying so hard to prove that she still loves you should be all the reassurance you need," Bill contended. "She's learned things about her parents that she never knew. As hard as it is she'll accept it and soon it'll just become another part of your lives together."

Saul rubbed the stubble on his chin and took another short sip.

"I guess. Ellen says she needs time."

Bill nodded and took a large gulp of his drink. He squinted in thought wondering how to broach the reason he'd found himself at Saul's door. He was still so confused by it himself. He wasn't even sure what kind of answer he was looking for. He just knew that he needed to ask, if only to clear the fog it had brought to his mind.

"Saul, Katya is part of the reason I stopped by."

The Colonel leaned forward and grimaced.

"Lords. What did she do now?" He asked bracing for some kind of complaint.

"It wasn't something she did. It was something she said."

"Laura again?" Saul naturally assumed. "I thought their condition was currently set to tolerable."

Bill shook his head.

"No, not with Laura. In fact…I'm not sure what to make of those two, but they seem to be growing on each other. It may be at a snail's pace but I'm glad. It's not about them. It was something that happened just a little while ago when I was on my way to the control center."

"Hm?"

Bill quizzically narrowed his eyes and looked up.

"Did you ever tell Katya about that old jody-call me and Starbuck would use?"

Saul took a deep breath and tried to remember.

"You mean that old 'what'dya hear' and all that?"

"Yeah," Bill confirmed.

"'Grab your gun' and so on and so on?"

"Something like that, yeah."

Saul thought for a moment and put his drink to his knee.

"Yeah…maybe. I suppose I could have. Probably did. I told her so much about the days on Galactica. She loved stories about Starbuck and Apollo as a kid. Why?"

Saul had no specific recollection of sharing it with Katya but he didn't trust his memory anymore.

"Think she would know it by heart?" Bill asked.

"What?"

"The jody-call? Would Kat know it offhand?"

Saul's brow lowered. The Old Man had a strange look on his face. It made him feel uneasy.

"I dunno, Bill. It's been awhile since she's asked to hear old war stories," He considered. "But she had a mind like a godsdamn steel trap as a kid. If I ever did mention it then I guess she could still remember it." He watched Bill nod but it seemed like he wasn't satisfied with the answer. "Why do you ask?"

"I saw her in the corridor earlier on my way to the control room. She was jogging. I don't know why but I saw her and it just…came out."

"What did?"

"I said- 'what'dya hear?' And she answered me. She didn't miss a beat. She answered the call exactly right; 'Nothing but the rain'."

"So I guess I did tell her then," Saul shrugged doing his best to minimize the event. "There's your answer."

Bill shook his head.

"It was strange."

"How so?"

Bill thought back to the odd interaction. The feeling that had overcome him was inexplicable. He didn't know how to take Katya's reaction but she looked even more disturbed by it than he felt himself.

"The way she looked at me after...It was like she was shocked or even maybe a little afraid. She ran off. I didn't have the chance to ask her."

Saul felt the blood partially drain from his face. His hands became clammy against the glass of his drink. He wasn't sure why but it was the same feeling he'd experienced upon hearing Katya shout for Husker and Helo in her dream. It was the same feeling that had kept him up all night. Quickly he shook his head in denial, internally blaming it all on his hurt shoulder and the medications he was on.

"She's a busy girl, Bill. She's always running off someplace. Half the time I don't even know what she's up to anymore."

Saul felt guilty for dismissing Bill's concern. He'd done it to Ellen months ago and she'd done it to him only a night before. He knew how frustrating it could be to look for validation and find none. He just didn't know what he would be affirming if he gave the other man's concern any credence.

"I guess," Bill sighed as he eased back into his seat with a tired groan.

He seemed willing to drop it for now and Saul took the opportunity to veer away from the strange topic.

"You leaving Laura home alone to drink with me?" He kidded.

"Laura isn't home," Bill answered in a somewhat deflated tone.

"Where is she?"

"I don't know. Maybe with a student," Bill shrugged. He knew that Laura must have had a long night after he fell to sleep. When he woke up and proceeded to dress and get ready for his shift she'd hardly moved. After Kaplan dismissed him he'd returned to their cabin to check on her but it was empty and the guards were gone. "I think she's upset with me anyway," He admitted.

It caused Saul to smirk into his drink.

"Let's hear it, Old Man. What did you do?"

Bill rubbed at his forehead in consideration before he spoke.

"Could have been a lot of things, I suppose. We had sort of a tough conversation last night," He vaguely confessed.

"Oh don't give me that. If you're in the doghouse with that women I'm sure you know what put you there."

"She wasn't mad. She just...didn't react well."

"To?"

Bill's drink was already empty. He placed the glass on the coffee table and stared at it as he spoke.

"We were talking about a lot of things; being here, our purpose, our life back in the fleet...learning about Katya. At least I was talking. It's harder for Laura to share how she feels sometimes," He confessed, "but I can usually see it well enough. Especially with how she feels about Katya. She already cares so deeply for her after just a few short months but…It's like the more she gets to know our daughter the more she mourns all of the time we missed with her instead of embracing what we have now."

"Understandable," Saul half defended.

"It is," Bill agreed.

"So what got her so upset at you?"

"Laura's been so discouraged with our lack of direction here, with not knowing how else to help. I started thinking that maybe we could do more on an individual level while we try to figure out the larger goal."

Saul could tell that Bill was dancing around the point.

"Like what?"

Bill sighed. Now that he was about to say it out loud he regretted it even more.

"After that last ambush I heard Kaplan talking about how the number of orphans in Orbit was rising. Mostly children of military personnel. I just thought that maybe taking one in would allow Laura to experience some of what she missed with Katya while doing a bit of good in this world."

Saul immediately scowled.

"Gods, Bill do we really need another brat around to worry about?"

"It was just an idea," Bill answered defensively.

Saul settled back in his seat. As strange as the notion was he could see Bill's good intentions.

"A noble one at that, I suppose," He offered.

"Laura didn't think so."

With his own drink now empty Saul set it aside. He rubbed at the top of his bald head trying to figure out what to say.

"You know, I suggested adoption to Ellen once. Back on Picon," He shared with some reluctance. When he could see that the confession had peaked Bill's interest he gained more confidence in going on. "We weren't having any luck having our own and she wanted it so badly. We had both started drinking more and more to escape the disappointment. I just wanted to fix things. First time I brought it up she stopped talking to me for about a week," He recalled. "It wasn't that it was a bad idea. If she and I weren't so pig headed we probably would have done it early on and been happier for it. Ellen sees now that adopted or not, we couldn't love Katya any more if she were our blood. It's just that back then it made her feel like we were giving up. You suggesting it to Laura…no matter how you framed it...must have reminded her that she never even got the chance to try."

Bill nodded in consideration. He trusted that Laura would get over his misstep soon. He wasn't even really sure if she was that upset at him over it. He just felt guilty and a little embarrassed. At least he was in good company.

"We're having a bit of a family get together here on New Year's day," Saul said after a while. "I think you and Laura should come. If not for dinner then at least for dessert or drinks."

Bill looked immediately skeptical.

"I don't know, Saul. This cabin isn't big enough for Laura and Ellen. Not with Katya in the mix. I think for the sake of all three of them I should respectfully decline," He said with a hint of sarcasm.

Saul rolled his eye and shook his head.

"Oh you're making too much of that, Bill."

"Too much?"

"I think so."

Bill looked at Saul as if he were insane.

"You are aware that they took swings at each other, aren't you?"

Saul let out a hearty chuckle.

"Oh yes, Sir."

"You find that funny?"

"I find it more than funny," Saul said as he puckishly waggled his brows.

Bill forced a look of disgust at his friend's vulgar implication.

"You know, you're a still an old pig, Saul."

"At least I admit it."

"Good gods."

"What do you want me to say, Bill? I'm sorry that my wife hit your wife? They aren't children. Far from it! I'll admit that it wasn't too becoming of Laura, but my Ellen could drive just about anyone to throw a fist. Besides, did Laura tell you the whole story? Everything that went on with the two of them?"

Bill frowned and shook his head.

"No. She wouldn't say much."

"Ellen wouldn't tell me squat either, but you know what? I'll tell you one thing; ever since then she's dropped whatever she had out for Laura. I can tell."

"How do you figure?"

"I couldn't mention that woman's name in this house before without my wife turning green with envy. Somehow now that's gone. I know it sounds strange but Ellen's anger toward Laura seems like it didn't make it through the ambush," Saul stated. He didn't know how to explain it but after a few days Ellen's attitude toward Laura Roslin just seemed different. He'd expected that her distaste for Laura would have been exacerbated by the past week's events but it was the opposite. "We don't blame Laura for what happened. I've told you that. Ellen did before but she was angry and scared and now we've all had time to think. She's the one who wants you both over for the holiday. She suggested it. Swear on my eye. Maybe they got out whatever aggression they needed. Those two women will never be friends, Bill. Godsdamn, they're like oil and water, but in this lifetime they have a mutual interest. Understand? And I'm betting that they would both endure a whole lot, even each other, if either thought that it would make Katya happy."

Bill took a deep breath and let it out.

"That might be true."

"Sure it is."

Maybe Saul was right. So much had gone on during the ambush. They were all confronted with the true uncertainty and danger of their current situation. It was possible that Laura and Ellen had been forced to face each other once and for all.

"I need to ask you something else, Saul."

"Go on."

Bill looked the Colonel in the eye before he spoke, knowing that the man's expression would give away the answer before his lips did.

"Did something happen that we don't know about? Something you're keeping from us?"

Saul looked down at his empty drink to buy some time. He wished like hell there was another sip left.

"About what?"

Bill tempered his annoyance over Saul's obvious evasion and went on.

"We had Helo and Athena over for dinner last night. It was Helo's first night on station. Since you and Ellen had the kids over here we thought the four of us would touch base. Wasn't anything constructive. Just wound up being a pleasant visit I guess. I did come away with one thing, though. I know when Sharon is keeping a secret from me. I know it because she hates to do it. Back in the fleet I had to learn quickly whether or not she was telling me the truth because there was a time when her honesty and loyalty was keeping us alive. She knows something about the ambush last week that for whatever reason she isn't willing to tell me and Laura." Bill studied his old friend's face for a moment. "Do you know what that is, Saul?"

Tigh leaned forward and finally met Bill eyes to eye.

"It's…inconsequential."

"Inconsequential," Bill parroted. "Is that how this is going to be, Saul? You're going to keep me in the dark? Back when I was your superior I didn't keep things from you," He added with some heat.

Saul swallowed hard. He knew that if he told Bill the secret would still be safe. It was the military they wanted to hide it from. They'd only kept it from the others to spare them some distress.

"Bill, the day of the ambush D'Anna was on the basestar." Saul kept his tone calm and steady as he went on. "She took it upon herself to reach out to the bots. She sent a transmission from the basestar; a message sent in binary code. She tried to reach out to them as another machine who had once been in their place. She offered to be sort of an…ambassador for compromise so to speak. I've read it. She was trying to help. She didn't understand that these things aren't as advanced as cylon were during the time of the attacks on the Colonies. She didn't understand that these machines have evolved without empathy, without community. She saw that we were at a standstill and she thought that she'd found her reason for being brought back to help. The bots returned her message." Saul could see anger growing on Bill's face but he powered through. "Their reply wasn't specific. I would call it a mechanical refusal of her naive proposal. Athena was there when the reply came in. She'd traveled to the basestar that day to escort D'Anna back to Delta Station. When the atmosphere was breached Athena sent me an urgent message alerting me to what D'Anna had done. Ellen and I asked her to keep it to herself. "

"Godsdamn it, Saul," Bill finally erupted. "You kept this from the military? From the very people you say you're trying to save!?"

"All indications are that the bots would have attacked anyway. D'Anna made no threats. It could have been a coincidence. And even if it wasn't, it's not as if there wouldn't have been another attack soon. We've been dealing with steadily increasing battle in Orbit for weeks. Ellen and I saw no good reason to incite any animosity toward D'Anna. She's still here as a savior. We didn't want her to be seen as some sort of evil accomplice or an instigator. Do you know what it would do to the people to know about this? And we kept it from the rest of you to save you from the frakking headache!"

"What was she doing on the basestar in the first place?"

"Margot took her there with Ellen's permission. She was trying to help the Specialist find a way to defuse the signal emanating from the atmosphere line. She was helping her daughter work."

"You make it sound like a family mishap! Why was she even allowed on the ship!?"

"We allow you and Katya to work together, Bill. You've been allowed to work with your daughter. There isn't much difference. D'Anna knows that ship. She's equipped to understand complicated communications and engineering issues. Ellen thought that she might be able to help Margot."

"You know what that woman is capable of!"

"You're damn right I know what she's capable of," Saul snarled, though he didn't mean to. "Of course I know. I helped design her. I know that we made mistakes with her line. We made mistakes with all of them. They weren't meant to be perfect. They were meant to be human. I know perfectly well what D'Anna was once capable of, Bill. Believe me. Did ya know, it was a Three that took my eye on New Caprica? A Three and a One," Saul said with a bitter snort. "Later when D'Anna looked at me for the first time after realizing that I was one of the Final Five I saw true remorse in her eyes and I knew that she had a soul worth forgiving. The same as I know she made those horrible misguided mistakes back then I also know that she learned from her last journey. She learned things I don't think I'll understand until I'm long dead and on the other side. That's why I brought her back in Starbuck's place. She sees things in a way others can't. She didn't get to complete her journey the last time. I don't think she would maliciously sabotage her chance for redemption. Especially with the way Ellen says she's taken to Margot. She wants a better life for her child. She was trying to help."

"Help," Bill mimicked.

"Yes, help! She's been told that she was brought back here to do just that. The way she went about it was obviously a mistake but she tried, Bill. She frakking tried!"

Bill shot up in his seat.

"Are you saying that we aren't? If you gave us a godsdamn clue as to why you brought us here then maybe we would be able to!"

"No. No I'm not saying that," Saul backtracked with a defensive palm up. "I know that you and Sharon and Helo are all trying to help in whatever ways you can. For frak sake none of us ever dreamed that you three would enlist. It's beyond admirable. Laura too. She didn't need to start teaching again. I see that she's trying to help in the ways that she can. Except for frakkin' Anders you've all done whatever you could think of to try and be of use. It hasn't gone unseen or unappreciated. Unfortunately those gestures…they aren't what these people need to survive."

Bill was silent for a moment before collapsing back in his chair.

"Well, I don't know what else to give them," He muttered.

"Neither do I," Saul groaned. "D'Anna tried to guess. She tried to use her own experience and her knowledge to fulfill her role here. It didn't work and she's sorry. She's ashamed. Most of all Ellen says she's depressed."

"Depressed?" Bill scowled.

"Margot became irate when she realized what her birthmother had done. She blamed D'Anna for the attack. She blamed her for every death and injury that occurred that day. Most of all she blames herself for bringing D'Anna to the ship in the first place. It's why Ellen can't get the poor girl to leave the basestar. She's locked herself in there with no company or staff other than the ship centurions. All she does is work and obsess over a fix for the atmosphere signal. Margot told D'Anna that she never wanted to see her again. Understandably, as her biological mother D'Anna has taken it to heart," Saul explained with a humble shrug. "I would think that you could sympathize with that, Bill. You say that they're learning to be civil to each other now, but you watched Laura's heart break when Katya tried to turn her away. It hurt, didn't it? D'Anna may be a machine, but so am I and I can tell you that we love our children as deeply as any human. Ellen says that D'Anna's been depressed ever since she came aboard Alpha."

Bill heard Saul defense loud and clear but he couldn't acknowledge it directly.

"You're in charge now, Saul. You've got to make sure something like this never happens again."

"You're all on one station now. We can keep tabs on everyone for better or worse. Before it was harder. We were trying to go about things while still working under the thumb of the EOC, the military and the Security Administration. If you haven't noticed Ellen's told just about all of them to go frak themselves. She's taking charge. She got all of you here and now…"

"Now what?"

Saul sighed and rubbed at his shoulder. He shook his head. He didn't know.

For a while they were both quiet again.

"There's a New Year's Eve party at Senchi," Saul said after a few minutes. "Mostly the kids go out and have a good time but Ellen and I always stick our heads in at some point during the night, have a toast or two. She likes to see them having a good time. You and Laura should think about it."

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 181B: ASSIGNMENT; ANDERS

YEAR: 2315

Katya couldn't shake her dream or the feelings it had brought her. Even the visit to the lab hadn't been enough to snap her out of it. She was glad to be there but once she and Alexi left the happy distraction was gone. She felt so much fear and guilt but she could hardly understand why. It was eating her from the inside out. Once they were back on the military side of the station Alexi quickly reported back to duty. Thanks to Tawny neither of them were obligated to do so but he'd made the decision to go in anyway. Katya knew it was because of how she'd woken by his side. The fact that he'd chosen to leave her and escape the tension between them had been the final straw. When he was gone from their cabin Katya called Ellen amidst a fit of rage filled tears and demanded that she come get her. The frantic nature of her voice had Ellen there in no time.

When Ellen arrived she attempted to calm and pacify Katya as if she were a toddler in the middle of a tantrum. The reality of her behavior wasn't far off but Katya wasn't responding to Ellen's gentle tactics.

"Sweetie, you need to calm down and tell me what's wrong!"

"I don't know! I don't know what's wrong. I can't think!"

"Baby, I don't understand. Something must have happened. Why won't you tell me?"

"Nothing happened! Nothing happened!"

"You expect me to believe that, Katya?! Look at yourself! You're scaring me to death!"

"I just need…I need your help!"

"Okay…Okay, kitten. Anything. Just name it."

"I want you to take me to Sam Anders. I want to go now."

Ellen was shocked at her daughter's request. The look in Katya's eyes was strange; frenzied, fearful but determined. A chill ran down Ellen's spine as she thought of Sam. His eyes so often looked the same when he was in the throes of one of his own fits. Though she was worried about Katya's state of mind she quickly agreed. She had been so worried over how she was going to convince the girl to see him. Now she didn't have to. She took Katya by the hand and they left for Sam's recently assigned quarters.

The guards in front of Sam's hatch were getting fairly used to Ellen's frequent visits. Alongside an unmoving centurion two marine guards gave her a familiar greeting as she approached the door with Katya in tow.

"He's in, I assume," Ellen addressed one marine.

"Yes, Ma'am. Been quiet all day."

Ellen chuckled under her breath and gave the guard a knowing roll of her eyes.

"Well then are you sure he's actually in there?" She teased.

With an amicable smile the guard nodded.

"He's in there ma'am."

"Alright," Ellen sighed. "Let's see what kind of mood he's in today."

She turned to Katya who was nervously wringing her hands a few feet behind her.

"Are you sure you're up for this, kitten?"

Katya swallowed and nodded.

Ellen wasn't sure why she was so suddenly so apprehensive about bringing Katya to see Sam. She'd been hoping that it would happen since he arrived on Alpha. Though the events of his resurrection had been alarming and his following strange obsession with Katya was quite unsettling Ellen trusted Sam. She believed in her heart that he was still the same man that she had known for thousands upon thousands of years. No matter what was wrong with him now, she truly believed he had no intentions of harming her child. She had no logical reason to be anxious about their meeting and yet she couldn't help the odd feeling she had. Ellen tried to calm her nerves. She should have been so happy to show Sam that she'd finally been able to experience being a mother. He had always been so supportive of her back when it was what she longed for most. With that in mind she gathered her confidence in her decision to bring her daughter to him.

Ellen reached for the young woman's hand and found that it was trembling. She gave it a squeeze and frowned. Katya looked truly frightened.

"I promise he won't hurt you, baby. Trust me. Okay?"

"I know."

As Ellen turned to knock on the hatch one of the marines stopped her.

"Mrs. Tigh?"

"Hm?"

"I didn't realize you planned on bringing Captain Isakoff inside with you."

"Well, did you think I was going to leave her parked outside like a damn scooter?"

"No, Ma'am. My apologies. It's just that she isn't on the clearance list we have."

"Aunt Ellen, I have to go in!"

"You are, baby. Just calm down," Ellen assured. "Look, Corporal, I make that list. Kaplan just signs off on it."

"Understood, Ma'am, but she still isn't on it. You would have to add her and wait for the commander's official approval. I don't have the authority to let her inside."

"Ellen!"

"Kat, shut up," Ellen scolded over her shoulder. "Corporal, the Captain is going in under my authority." Ellen gave a subtle glance to the centurion beside them. The machine protectively inched its way toward the hatch as if it had every intention of seeing both women inside. The marine guards both paled at the sight and temporarily lost all appearance of dominance. The cylons were their allies but everyone knew that they answered to the Tighs above all. "I suggest you take it up with your commander," Ellen snidely suggested. She gave a thankful nod and a wink to the loyal centurion. They didn't all have names like Vladi did but sometimes she thought that they deserved them. "C'mon, kit."

The guards showed no further signs of protest.

Ellen started to bang her open fist against the hatch of the cabin. It took a few frustrating repetitions before an angry muffled voice came through the thick door.

"What!?"

Though she was expecting his usually less than amicable greeting Ellen's shoulders fell. She was hoping that his second impression on Katya would go better than the first.

"Sam, it's me."

"I'm not in the mood, Ellen!" Sam's voice charged. "Go away!"

Katya panicked.

"What? No. Ellen!"

If she didn't go in now she knew that she might never get the nerve again.

"Oh ignore that, kit," Ellen shrugged. "This is just what he does. Every godsdamn time," She added under her breath.

Sam usually let Ellen in after a short cursory verbal battle through the hatch. It had become somewhat of a habit that started back during her visits on Delta Station.

"Sam, open the door! I need to talk to you."

Ellen attacked the hatch with another fit of her frustrated fist.

"Forget it," Sam called again. "I'm tired."

Though he was using it as an excuse to get Ellen to leave Sam actually was exhausted. Tawny had escorted him home from the ward in the early hours of the morning. The laser procedure had been as excruciating as she'd promised. It was his choice to go without anesthesia and now he was suffering for it. Though he was sore he'd refused to take even the mild pain pills the doctor offered to leave in his quarters. Tawny assured him that he would soon feel much better but he had been struggling to rest through the pain all day.

"Sam, open up!" Ellen shouted. "I'm not leaving so just open the frakking door before I have these men open it for you!"

She had done it before on days when her patience was worn too thin for his games. Sam knew better than to chalk it up to an idle threat.

"Ellen, give it a rest already!" Sam barked, "Besides, I drank everything you brought over anyhow," He ribbed. "The bar is dry here. Go someplace else!"

"You supplied this maniac with liquor?" Katya ridiculed at Ellen's back.

Ellen placed her forehead on the cool metal of the door and sighed.

"Sweetie, you can't bring people back from the dead and then tell them that they have to be sober," She mumbled, trying to hide her irritation with some humor. "It's bad manners."

Katya shook her head and rolled her eyes.

"Well, if he wants to see me so bad you tell him it's now or never. I'm not standing here like an idiot any longer." Ellen looked over her shoulder once more to study Katya. Her voice sounded so strange. "I'm not kidding. Now or I'm out."

Ellen nodded and turned back to face the hatch.

"Sam!" She called again. "This is important. I have someone with me who I think you want to see. A visitor. Someone who wants to talk to you."

He was suddenly silent and Ellen took it as a good sign. She backed away from the door and gave Katya a knowing look.

"Aunt Ellen, does he really makes you go through all of that just to get in?"

"Usually," Ellen said with a tilt of her head. "He's a lot more welcoming once I get inside."

Once Ellen was in the cabin and they each had a drink in them Sam was generally more receptive. He was calmer and more like the man she once knew.

Katya shook her head in disbelief.

"What's wrong with this asshole?"

"I dunno, baby," Ellen admitted with a sigh.

The door clicked on the other side.

Katya's back went stiff, her eyes went wide and she felt her teeth clench tight.

"Finally," Ellen groused as the door began to open.

Sam's eyes were over Ellen's shoulder from the moment he pulled back the hatch. Tawny would have come on her own and the Admiral was too fed up with him to visit again so soon. Helo would have just announced himself the way he had the day before. Sam had been hopeful at Ellen's announcement of a visitor but he hadn't truly believed it could be true until he saw the young woman at her back. He was silent as he stared at Katya. She returned his gaze for only a moment before tearing her eyes away and scowling down at the floor as if she'd just looked directly into the sun.

"Well, aren't you going to invite us in, Sam?" Ellen mocked.

His eyes didn't leave Katya. Though he heard what Ellen was saying her voice sounded miles away.

He nodded and clumsily backed his way into the cabin.

Ellen was quick to enter but when she didn't sense Katya behind her she turned back and gave the girl a warning glare.

"Kat," She called with a flick of her wrist. Slowly Katya entered without lifting her focus from her feet. "C'mon. Get in here. I want you to officially meet my oldest and dearest friend, though he sometimes forgets the latter," She mused. "Sweetie, this is Samuel T. Anders."

Katya didn't want to look up at him. She told herself not to even though it felt like her eyes were being pulled in his direction like a pair of neodymium magnets. It almost hurt to stop herself.

"Sam," Ellen continued proudly, "this is my daughter, Yekaterina Isakoff."

At the sound of her own name Katya finally gathered herself enough to look up at the man in front of her. When she did she found that he looked almost as stunned and fearful as she felt.

Sam took in the sight of the young woman in front of him; the so called stranger he'd been begging to see since he first awoke in a foreign time and place. His breath suddenly got caught between his throat and his lungs and he had to force himself to breathe normally.

Katya was all that he could remember from his resurrection but it was only the feelings that he recalled. Her image had been filled in later with Ellen's proud collection of pictures and his own searches on the network. He knew from her photos that she would be beautiful. Finally seeing her in person he found her downright breathtaking, but nothing about the way she looked felt right.

She was too tall and too lean. Now that he was truly in her presence he could sense a certain air that she carried. It wasn't what he'd expected at all. She seemed sort of stuck up and entitled instead of just overconfident like he'd anticipated. For a moment he had to remind himself of who she was raised by. Two lifetimes ago he had spent many hours wondering what the Tigh's child might be like and praying that they would get the chance to find out. It never happened. Now eons later their adopted daughter didn't look the part but she certainly fit the bill. Sam was sure that she had never wanted for anything material as a child. At least not once she was in the Tigh's care. He was positive that even Saul had become putty in the girl's hands. He knew without a doubt that their little girl would have been spoiled rotten. She would have been showered with love and attention in a way only Ellen Tigh could manage. Sam sensed all of this from the young woman in front of him but still he felt an air of need from her as if she had been given the moon and the stars and yet always pined for what she couldn't have. That need, at least, felt familiar to him. It felt right and it was actually comforting.

Sam's eyes narrowed as he studied her further. He had to stop himself from shaking his head. Despite the military position she held Sam thought she looked too delicate. She looked almost refined with her dark hair pulled back and her long curled lashes. It was then that he was suddenly reminded of who had truly sired her. She may have been a Tigh but she was Roslin's and the Admiral's by blood. The more he looked at her the more evident it was in her appearance. It wasn't a resemblance one would notice right away but he had known these people for ages. He could see Roslin in the way the girl carried herself, in her bone structure and in the line of her jaw, and her coloring was undeniably Adama. When Sam saw a hint of Apollo in the corners of her eyes he felt himself wince. It was too much to wrap his mind around and he pushed the thought away.

"Sam, you've been asking to meet Kat for weeks," Ellen prompted. "Aren't you going to say hello?"

Sam swallowed but his mouth was dry.

Ellen looked toward Katya. She looked as stunned as Sam did.

"Kitten? Are you getting shy on me? Say hi," She encouraged as if she were coaxing a small child.

"Aunt Ellen, please leave," Katya said curtly.

Ellen squinted in confusion.

"What?"

"I'd like you to go."

"Go?"Ellen asked with a bit of a nervous laugh.
"What for?"

"Don't leave me here," Katya clarified. "Just…could you step outside? Just for a second?"

Ellen was totally perplexed.

"I suppose. I mean I guess I could." She was completely confused by her daughter's behavior. She took a few steps toward Katya and spoke close to her ear. "Baby, are you sure that you want me to go? I don't understand. A day ago you didn't want to be anywhere near him."

"I'm sure. Just don't go far. Okay?"

Ellen took a few steps back and momentarily glanced in Sam's direction.

"Alright. If that's what you want."

"It is," Katya reaffirmed.

Ellen gave a reluctant nod.

"I'll just be outside then," She said as she tentatively walked to the hatch.

"Thank you, Ellen," Sam called as she hesitantly made her way to the door. "Thank you so, so much."

She narrowed her eyes and looked them both over with a strange sense of apprehension.

"Don't thank me, Sam," She said flatly. "I'll be outside if either of you needs me."

Ellen slipped through the hatch eyeing the pair cautiously, almost suspiciously as she left. When the door clicked shut Sam's lips curved into a soft smile.

"I was so afraid that you wouldn't come," He finally said. "I thought that your frakkin' stubbornness was about to win out."

"My stubbornness?" Katya snapped. "What the hell do you know about me?"

At the abrupt spike in her temper Sam's smile brightened. He'd misjudged her. She had appeared somewhat lissome at first but in a flash he could see the hardness underneath. She was loved, that he knew, but someone or something had hurt her long before. Maybe ages before. The damaged look in her eyes was familiar even though the color wasn't.

Sam shrugged.

"Nothing," He said shaking his head. "Nothing…everything…"

"You're still babbling! Same as when I saw you in that damn tub. I didn't come here to be circle talked."

Her antagonistic words suddenly incited an old spark within Sam and he found himself snapping back at her.

"Then why did you come, huh?"

"So you would stop pestering my family!"

"I'm not trying to pester them."

"Oh really? So why did Aunt Ellen have babysit you on Delta for weeks at a time? Why is Tawny suddenly begging me to appease you? We thought you would come here and help us. You're a total disaster."

"I'm sorry. I never meant to…"

"I know that you tried to get to me through Margot too. You dismissed her and then you tried to use her when you thought it would get you closer to me. Your own flesh and blood! Your daughter! You're sick!"

"I had to! I had to get closer to you, Kara!"

Sam saw her eyes go wild with fear and he quickly put his palms up in defense.

"Katya," He said, cringing and forcing the correction. "Sorry. I'm sorry."

"What the hell do you want with me?"

Sam smiled sadly and rubbed his forehead when he felt unexpected tears well in his eyes. The more she spoke the more validation he felt. He was so sure now.

"Please…please don't tell me that you don't know. You have to know in some way…who you are."

Katya's face surged with panicked heat.

"I know who I am," She seethed as she started to slowly back away from the strange man.

"I waited for you for so long. So long," Sam nearly cried. "When I first woke up here I couldn't remember why you'd left me on the other side. But then during the last attack I remembered. After I came out of that frakking episode, that cylon seizure, whatever the frak it is…I remembered…at least partially. You came here for your family. They needed you so you came."

"I don't know what the fuck you're talking about."

Sam inched closer to her negating the space she'd defensively made between them. He couldn't help it. He was drawn to her. Her tongue was a flint and her temper the fire. The more she spoke the more familiar she became to him and the more she ignited the flames in his heart.

"They brought us back. All but one because they just couldn't. They couldn't do it so you came back yourself. You found a way. You know it. You do. I see it in your eyes, Kara."

He was positive now. Her eyes told him everything he needed to know as he inched further toward her. They were an ultramarine shade of blue, so different from the warm hazel in his mind but they held the same worried wonder that he remembered so vividly.

"Stop calling me that."

Her tone was caught between a warning and a plea but all Sam could hear was the fact that her voice was shaking with doubt. He reached out to cup her chin and to his surprise she didn't move from his touch.

"I'm so glad that you're here," He said as he ran his thumb down her cheek.

For a long moment it seemed as though she was studying his face through her tears. He saw so much curious fear in her eyes and maybe, he hoped, a momentary flash of mutual recognition. She closed her eyes and he watched as large droplets squeezed out of the corners of her lids. When she opened them again the look of curiosity was gone. Sam only saw fire and anger.

"Touch me again and I'll tell my husband," She warned through gritted teeth. "And then I'll tell my partner," She added. "And instead of getting my own hands dirty I'll let the two of them duke it out over who gets to pound you into space dust."

Sam smirked at the threat and leaned in further closing the space left between them. She could feel his breath on her cheeks.

"So it's always the same with you, huh?" He intentionally goaded, hoping to stoke a flame deep within. "No matter what life you live you always have two men pining after you, Kara?"

"What?"

"Figures," He scoffed taking a deliberate step back and putting his hands on his hips.

She suddenly stormed closer to him shoving an angry finger into his broad and infuriatingly pompous chest.

"This time I made a frakking choice!"

Her own words seemed to stun her.

Sam watched her mouth drop open in fright. Her bottom lip trembled. Her eyes looked like glass.

"It is you," He whispered.

The air was thick and electric as they stared at one another in disbelief.

They each turned with a jump when they heard a knocking sound at the hatch.

"Are you two okay?" Ellen called from the other side.

Neither answered.

Katya turned to Sam making sure to leave some room between them. She closed her mouth, narrowed her eyes and straightened her spine.

"You listen to me. My name is Yekaterina Natalia Isakoff and it has been since the day I was born here on Alpha Station in the Earth's Orbit in 2293. My father was Dr. Mikhail Isakoff. My adoptive parents are Saul and Ellen Tigh. I'm a captain serving Orbit Patrol and wife of Marine Sergeant Alexi Petrov. That's who you're looking at. That's who I am, what I am. Got it?"

Sam licked his lips and looked her up and down.

"Yes," He nodded. "I see that."

And he did. The woman in front of him had her own life, her own personality and passions. He didn't pretend to understand it but he just knew that she was so much more than she claimed to be.

"I see that very well…but…are you sure that's all you are?"

"Kit?" Ellen called from the hall.

Katya wiped her eyes. She looked away from Sam and shook her head in defiant dismissal.

"I'm leaving."

His heart sank like a stone.

"Kar- Katya please don't. Please?"

"I'm leaving," She insisted, trudging to the hatch.

"Don't do this," He begged. "Don't run from me."

Her shoulders stiffened and she paused. When she did Sam stopped chasing after her.

"I'll be back," She stated over her shoulder.

He huffed and anxiously ran his hands through his hair.

"How can I be sure of that?"

For some reason his distrust immediately insulted her. She spun on her heels to face him again.

"Hey when I say I'm going to do something, I do it! Got it?"

In an instant Sam had flashes of a cylon occupied Caprica; the resistance camp, a musty room with a cot and the dusty courtyard. For a moment he could almost feel the dogtags in his hand.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "Yeah, I remember."

She looked forward and wrenched the door open. Ellen stood right at the hatchway, eyes large and worried.

"Are you two alright? I heard shouting."

Katya brushed passed her without a word and took off running down the hall.

"Sam, what the frak happened!?" Ellen asked in a panic.

No matter what Sam said he knew that he was going to have to answer to Ellen. She'd looked so nervous when Katya first opened the door. Now she looked furious. Sam had begged Ellen Tigh to bring Katya to him for weeks. She'd trusted him and now her child had obviously run off upset and there was no one around to blame but him. He braced for the ramifications and gave her as honest of a smile as he could muster.

"Nothing, Ellen. I'm just glad to have finally met your daughter. You and Saul must be very proud."

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 137B: ASSIGNMENT; AGATHON

YEAR: 2315

"Sharon?" Helo called from the bedroom.

They were still getting used to their new surroundings. Though their new cabin aboard Alpha Station was nearly identical to the one they had on Beta Station it had a whole new feeling. They were relieved to be there. They were glad to be closer to the Tigh's protective care and they were glad to have Roslin and Adama so near. Even by one another's side it had been lonely aboard the other station. The move to Alpha was welcome. Most of all they were happy to be close to Blaze. Any apprehensions or misgivings that they had about being brought into the life they were now living became obsolete knowing that they were getting to experience the life of their son.

"Sharon?" Helo called once more as he left the bedroom.

"Yeah," She answered, her voice sounding distracted and a bit distant.

"Blaze sent me a message. He wants to show me the rec-room and the gym. We might even spar a little."

"Now?" Sharon asked.

She was leaning against the side of the sofa and had a slightly pained look on her face.

"Yes, now. You should come," Helo smiled. His grin faded when he noticed his wife's discomfort. She was rubbing at her forearm. "It's bothering you again?" He said as he moved toward her and took her arm into his hands.

"It was," She shrugged. "It's going away now."

Since Sharon arrived aboard Alpha she'd been experiencing a strange intermittent pain eminating above her wrist. She hadn't told Karl while he was still awaiting his transfer but it didn't take him long to notice once they were together again. Now and then she would feel an inexplicable sharp sensation. It would catch her off guard and was more startling than it was painful. She couldn't remember injuring it and there was no indication of trauma to the area.

"I really want you to go see someone. The doctor here, uh, what's his name? Xao? Ellen said he would treat us if anything came up."

"I will."

"Well, why don't we go now? I can cancel with Blaze. I'm sure he'll understand."

"No, Helo. Don't," Sharon said abruptly. Helo looked confused, even a little startled."I'm sorry. It's just...now that we're here I think we should take whatever opportunities there are to spend with Blaze. We all have so much time to make up for. My arm is fine. It's can wait."

Helo nodded. He was worried about her but he understood why their time with Blaze was so important.

"Hey, here's an idea; why don't you let Blaze take a look at it? Tigh told me that he was trained in some kind of medicine. I think physical therapy."

Sharon shrugged.

"I can go to the ward. I don't want to worry him. I'd rather you two just hit the gym and go along with your plans. You've hardly seen him since before the ambush."

Blaze had accompanied Sharon to the landing deck when Helo's shuttle landed. Though he was there for the short greeting Helo hadn't had much of an opportunity to spend time with him. The young lieutenant reported to a shift soon after and then to Saul and Ellen's for dinner later that night.

It wasn't until Sharon and Helo's dinner with Roslin and Adama that the couple understood the full extent of what their son had done during the ambush. Hearing the Admiral speak Blaze's praises had been such a proud moment for Helo, but it also made both he and Sharon realize how much danger their child had been in.

A knock at the hatch sounded and Helo smiled. Sharon nodded toward the door, encouraging her husband to answer.

Helo took no time in opening the hatch.

"Good to see you, L.T." He greeted with a broad smile.

"Likewise, Cap," Blaze happily answered. "Sorry I didn't get a chance to show you around much on your first day but I figured now would be a good time. Ya know, before Kaplan okays your service aboard and we're all too busy to do squat," He joked.

With a few more pleasantries Blaze made his way inside dressed in gym shorts and station tanks with a duffel slung on his back. It warmed Helo's heart to see the young man walk over to Sharon and greet her with a peck on the cheek. The two had taken to each other so well.

"So how do you two like Alpha so far?" Blaze asked his parents.

"We're both really glad to be here," Sharon answered for the both of them.

"I know I talked up Beta while you guys were there. Don't get me wrong; it's my home station. I love it there. I'm proud of it and all it does for the rest of the system but there is something about Alpha. I think you guys will like it a lot better."

"We already do," Sharon stated.

Helo nodded by her side.

"It's good to be with familiar faces," He added.

"Understandable," Blaze said with his hands to hips. "I know that Ellen and the Colonel are relieved to have you here. I'm sure Roslin and the Admiral will feel a little less out of place now."

"They were very welcoming," Helo affirmed. "We ate with them last night. Admiral Adama had lots to say about you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," Helo echoed. "He said you threw yourself on top of him during an explosion."

"Oh…well. I would have done it for any of you. I needed to get him down to the bunkers unharmed. Was nothing anyone else wouldn't have done."

Helo shook his head.

"He said that you showed exceptional bravery and professionalism. He's never thrown words around like that lightly."

"It's just my job," Blaze shrugged. "I mean you two know how it is."

"Exactly," Sharon told him. "We do know. And we're really proud of you…as friends…as family. Whatever way you want to take it, I guess."

Blaze almost blushed before he smiled.

"I'll take both then."

Suddenly Sharon let out a hiss and grabbed at her arm.

"Again?" Helo said rushing next to her.

"What? What's wrong?" Blaze worriedly asked.

"It's nothing," She insisted. "It's fine."

"Sharon, let's just head down to the ward," Helo pleaded.

"No. It's fine."

Helo turned to his son.

"She's been having this weird pain in her arm for about a week. Heard you know a thing or two about anatomy. Think you can take a look?"

Blaze grimaced and hesitantly made his way closer to Sharon.

"Was it injured?"

"No."

"Well my apprenticeship was with a physical therapist in athletic medicine so I can't really make a diagnosis as much as I could help treat it if I knew what was wrong, but I'll take a look if you don't mind," Blaze offered.

"Let em', Sharon. Might as well."

Sharon reluctantly nodded.

Blaze gently took his mother's arm into his hands and examined the area.

"Does it hurt to the touch?"

"No."

Blaze was quiet and studious and he ran his fingers over the smooth skin above Sharon's wrist. Helo observed his son's attentiveness and how he could assume such a professional demeanor so quickly.

"You know, Blazer, it's really impressive that you all managed to graduate with some kind of specialization before going into basic training. I almost didn't finish high school," Helo admitted.

"Well, we were all raised by scientist," Blaze explained. "It was kind of ingrained in us to do something academic before committing to the fight. We got to go through school at our own pace and then picked something that interested us. I always liked the idea of healing. I didn't really want to be a medical doctor but the idea of taking away someone's pain or discomfort…I dunno. I like knowing that I can help with that. I'm pretty good at it too, if I do say so myself," Blaze boasted. "Just ask Kat. She was in an accident a few months ago. I fixed her neck and back right up. I keep telling her that if it wasn't for me she'd still be walking around here like she had a coat hanger in her uniform."

"An accident?" Sharon asked with a furrowed brow.

Blaze nodded.

"Yup. In flight. It wasn't too long after Roslin and Adama resurrected. There was an atmosphere breach below Alpha Quadrant. Our squad went out. Koshka was hit. She lost control and spun right into another bird. She was lucky she came out of it alive," He explained. "Try twisting and bending for me, Sharon."

She did as he asked though she knew it wouldn't trigger the sensation.

"It doesn't hurt to move. It's more random than that," She explained.

"Well," Helo interjected. "I'm sure the Captain was glad to have your help."

"She bitched the whole way through her sessions but she knows that they helped," Blaze joked as he checked for lumps or swelling in Sharon's arm. " Ya know, Kat's been out of the air even longer than I have. We both got grounded because of the signal effects but she hasn't flown since her accident. It's driving me crazy but it must be killing her."

Helo nodded.

"I think Sharon and I both understand that feeling. I mean, I know we can't fly. Gods, they won't even let us walk the halls without guard duty, but it would be nice just to get in the cockpit again."

"Man, I would love to get both of you in a hawk or a falcon," Blaze beamed.

"Maybe one day," Helo offered.

"Maybe," Blaze shrugged and let go of the woman's arm. "Well, Sharon, I don't want to freak you out but the way you're talking about the pain, it sounds as if it could be something like a clot. You should probably go see Xao ASAP."

Helo frowned.

"A clot? Is that dangerous?"

"Sure could be," Blaze answered. I mean it could also be nothing. I see nothing alarming but that doesn't mean that there isn't something there. Could be some harmless nerve damage. Either way, they can fix it up for you in the ward. If it is a clot it's just vascular scan for detection and then a zap of a laser to dissolve it. At the worst it's an injection to the site."

"Sharon, let's go," Helo prompted. "I'll go with you."

"No. No, that will make me feel worse. And Blaze just said, it could be nothing. I promise I'll go now on my own if you two just go have some fun."

Helo looked skeptical.

"I dunno."

"I don't mind if you want to see the gym another time," Blaze offered.

"No, please?" Sharon repeated with some distress. "Just go. I promise I'll message you both if it's anything worth the slightest concern. I swear."

Helo sighed.

"You're sure?"

"Yes. Maybe I'll even meet up with you after. Please, Karl. Just do this for me?" She asked him in a low tone.

Finally he nodded in agreement.

"Alright, but you call me if it's anything. I mean anything even remotely alarming."

"I will."

"Don't worry, Helo," Blaze smiled. "We've got those cylon genes. Machine-strong," He winked.

Helo smiled at the younger man's humorous attempt at making them all feel better.

"Don't I know it."

"You two go," Sharon insisted. "Next time I'm coming along though, so get ready."

"I hear that," Blaze said, picking up his duffle bag and turning toward the door.

"You call me when you know something, Sharon."

"I will, Helo. But it's nothing. I just have a feeling."

As the two men left Sharon felt the last of the faint burning in her arm start to fade. She thumbed over the small area that her son had just caringly examined. Two bodies ago she'd sported a scar in that very spot. It was mark she'd worn with a sad sense of pride. She'd been in shackles when she was brought to the CIC that day. She'd cut her own flesh and sent out a virus killing dozens of her own kind in order to protect her little growing family and to prove her loyalty to another race. Years later when Helo shot her she'd resurrected on a cylon basestar to save their daughter. She'd resurrected without the scar but she no longer felt she needed it to prove her worth or her allegiance. She was a person and she had her own merits. Now she stood in yet another body free of any old markings but the person she was had carried through hundreds of thousands of years. Sharon remembered the pain of the blade in her arm and the cable that fed into the wound. It was long healed but she would never forget it. She rubbed the at phantom pain once more before gathering herself and making her way to the ward.

LOCATION: ALPHA SPACE STATION; approximately 200 miles above the surface of planet Earth

CORRIDOR B

MILITARY QUARTERS

CABIN 119B: ASSIGNMENT; TIGH

YEAR: 2315

Katya lay on top of her parent's rack with her journal projected over her cuff. She furiously tapped in note after note before suddenly turning onto her stomach with a groan. When the projection collapsed into her cuff's screen she reached for Ellen's pillow, dragging it toward her nose. She inhaled deeply as she clutched it but the sheets were freshly laundered so she couldn't smell the woman's comforting perfume.

As if on cue Ellen walked into the room and headed toward her dresser.

"All ready for bed, kitten?" She asked over her shoulder.

Katya grumbled into the pillow in response.

After an evasive and frustrating conversation with Sam following Katya's exit Ellen had tried to locate her daughter all afternoon. She sent her message after message and called her about half a dozen times. Katya didn't answer until later in the evening when she asked if she could stay the night. Ellen quickly agreed.

"Uncle Saul is all set up in your room. I sent the laundry out and made the bed so it would be all ready for you."

"Thanks," Katya muttered. When she arrived at the cabin she'd asked Ellen to stay the night with her as if she'd watched a scary movie and didn't want to be alone in her room. Instead of squeezing on to her old single rack together Ellen suggested a more comfortable alternative. "Are you sure Uncle Saul doesn't mind being kicked out of his bed?"

"It's fine, sweetie," Ellen insisted. "In fact it's better for him. He'll sleep in your old bed without having to worry about me knocking into his shoulder all night. It's just…"

"What?"

Ellen squinted and studied Katya's distant demeanor.

"Are you sure you want to stay?"

"I'm positive," Katya affirmed.

She rolled her eyes and went back to typing notes into her cuff.

Ellen watched her for a moment more and then went into the head to change and wash up. When she returned and dressed for bed Katya was still typing away.

"What are you up to?"

"Hm?"

"I've noticed that you're always pecking at that thing lately. You're always either typing into your cuff or tablet. You can't be working all the time, Katya."

"I'm not working all the time."

"So what are you doing? Just messaging friends?"

"No…I don't know anyone I'd like to talk to that much."

"So?" Ellen pushed.

Katya shrugged and quit typing.

"I've just been recording some things."

"Like what?"

Katya thought about it for a moment as she sucked on her bottom lip.

"Things that happen or things I think of."

She had been writing more than that. Katya tried to write a note a night to someone she loved even though she knew her that thoughts might never be read. Laura was right. It had helped her to deal with everything that was going on around her. She'd even taken to recording bits of important data; names of soldiers or pilots who were lost that day, important events like friend's promotions or graduations. She'd become nearly obsessed with keeping track of Earth Orbit's population. Every night before bed she would look up the current count on the network and record the updated number in her journal. "Just little things here and there. So they aren't forgotten," Katya shrugged.

Ellen frowned.

"So you're keeping a diary?"

"No," Katya said somewhat defensively. A diary made it sound frivolous. That wasn't how it felt. Her journal had become so important to her. "Well, I dunno. Something like that. I suppose."

"You never did that before," Ellen noted as she walked toward her dresser to return a few pieces of clothing.

She looked down to hide any hint of judgment that might be apparent on her face.

"I know," Katya answered. "Someone suggested it to me," She added, purposefully avoiding the fact that it had been Laura's advice. "I've been trying to keep up with it."

Ellen nodded as she closed the drawer.

Katya couldn't tell if she was suspicious of where the idea had come from. She scooted closer to the wall making room as Ellen made her way to the rack.

"Well, kit, instead of writing all of your thoughts down in a diary why don't you share them with me like you used to?" Ellen asked as she removed her slippers. "My kind may have started out as machines but I have better conversation skills than your cuff's notepad," She teased with a smile.

Katya wasn't amused at the comparison.

"I'm not doing it for conversation. I'm just documenting things so that I don't forget. This way it's all logged. And one day when I'm gone it might still even exist somehow on the network for someone to find and remember."

Ellen's brow lowered. She eased on to the bed and scooted closer to her daughter.

"For who to remember?"

Katya shrugged and shook her head.

"Anyone… Just so someone knows that I was here… and knows who and what I cared about," She proposed. "You know I haven't flown in months, and I know that it's been a big relief to you but it's driving me crazy. I've never feared death while flying in Orbit. Never. What I really fear most…is being forgotten after I'm gone."

Ellen's lips parted in both confusion and sadness as her daughter spoke. She reached out, taking the girl's right wrist and thumbed soothingly at her soft unencumbered skin, free of the ever present gadget on her left.

"No one is going anywhere, baby. Not for a long, long time," She said softly. She watched on as Katya nodded and then looked away. All of the worry that she'd spent the last few days asking Saul to ignore was now suddenly flooding through her too. She couldn't forget the frantic state that Katya had been in when she'd asked to be taken to Sam. Something was wrong. No matter how much Katya insisted that she didn't want to talk about it Ellen couldn't help but search for some incite as to what was troubling her child. "Won't Alexi miss you if you sleep here?"

Katya shook her head and rubbed at her tired eyes.

"He went out for the night with Blaze. Besides, I don't think he really wants to see me right now."

"Why not?"

Katya swallowed and looked up at the ceiling above the rack. Her throat tightened and she fought off the emotion that threatened. What was she supposed to say? That she'd awoken by her husband's side calling out another man's name? That she was dreaming of a stranger? That Alexi didn't want her back in their bed until she could come to terms with whatever it was that was interfering in every other part of their lives together? It all would have taken a dozen more confessions just to explain.

"Things just got a little heated earlier. It's fine. I'm giving him some space."

"What happened?"

"Aunt Ellen, please? I don't want to talk about it. I want to sleep."

"Why do you want to stay here, Katya?" Ellen pressed.

Katya huffed and pushed herself up on her elbows. Her breasts were sore and swollen. Anything that could have given her relief was left back in her quarters. She grimaced and quickly tried to hide her discomfort.

"I want to stay with you, Ellen," She groaned in frustration. "Maybe I'll actually sleep through the night if I stay here. You know I haven't been sleeping well."

"I know," Ellen relented.

"I always sleep better if you're with me."

Ellen was more than a comfort to her. She was a sense of security but in spite of how honest and heartfelt Katya's words were she'd been manipulative with the way she'd used them; pouting like a little girl. It worked like a charm, inciting Ellen's protective and nurturing nature just as Katya had intended.

"I know, kitten. Just relax," Ellen told her as she tugged lightly at Katya's elbow, encouraging her to rest back on the pillows. "Well, maybe it would be a nice time to talk as long as you're here. We finally have some time alone."

"I told you that I don't want to talk. I want to get some sleep."

"We don't have to talk about Lex," Ellen surrendered, trying to keep her voice neutral and calming. "But if you won't tell me about him then will you tell me what happened with Sam today? I think I deserve a little bit of an explanation. You sort of scared me today, Kat," She admitted.

Katya couldn't get mad at her for asking. She'd been acting like a lunatic before Ellen took her to see Sam. The way she ran out of his cabin must have set off about a dozen of Ellen's alarm bells. It wasn't fair to leave her totally in the dark.

"Nothing happened," Katya feebly attempted.

"Alright…then what was with the hysterics? Why did you have such a fit and decide so suddenly that you wanted to see him?"

"I dunno…" Katya struggled for a way to tell Ellen the truth without telling her all of it. "Because I was so sick of hearing about him asking for me and begging to see me. I'm so fucking sick of nothing constructive happening around here. I decided that if it was what Sam needed to move on and finally do what he's here to do then I had to give that to him," She explained. At least it was a tiny slice of the truth. "And I wanted to tell him what a piece of shit I think he is for ignoring Margot."

Ellen cringed at the complexity of their issues. She had another troubled young girl to think of who was all alone miles and miles away. For the moment she had to deal with the one by her side.

"You ran out of there, Kat. Why?"

Katya gave Ellen a suspicious look and turned on to her side so that she didn't have to face her.

"I'm sure you talked to Sam when I left," She tested. "What did he say?"

"Nothing. It was…strange. He said that he was glad to have met you. He apologized for causing so much trouble. He told me that you were all that he could remember from his resurrection and that somehow seeing you again made him feel better. That's all he would say. He was blocking me. I couldn't read anything behind his words."

"Oh."

"What was all the shouting for if nothing happened?"

Katya raised a brow, now confident that Sam had kept their interactions a secret. She turned back to face the other woman.

"Well, he's kind of an asshole, Ellen," She said matter-of-factly.

Ellen smiled and shook her head with a low chuckle.

"He's really not. He's a sweetheart if you get to know him."

"I don't want to get to know him." Katya bit her lip and looked down at the freshly laundered quilt. "Aunt Ellen…I know that you two were close back on your Earth but…did you two ever…"

"No," Ellen answered abruptly. "No, kitten. I know that's not very believable coming from me but it's true," She said plainly. Katya looked up at her and tried to mask the inexplicable relief that washed over her as Ellen continued. "He was just a dear friend and a trusted colleague. We flirted, of course. It was just friendly stuff. He worked closely with Uncle Saul at our research labs. They considered each other good buddies back then too, believe it or not. We were all close; Galen and Tori too. We all added something special and unique to our research and development team and it transferred into our friendship as well. Then we all had such a long journey to the Colonies together. We became like family. Sam and I were close. Very close. I could tell him pretty much anything."

Katya nodded and let out a breath she hadn't known that she'd been holding in.

"Seems like Tawny's been spending some time with him."

The comment came out with more disdain than she'd expected and she almost blushed.

"Yes," Ellen said with a slight nod. "She has been."

Katya looked to Ellen in order to gauge her reaction.

"Think she's sleeping with him?"

"Well…I dunno, kit," Ellen answered. "Maybe."

She was aware of everyone who visited Sam and how often they came to him. She was well aware of how much Tawny had been in his cabin since she brought him to Alpha.

"Well, she shouldn't be."

Katya's strange reaction had Ellen intrigued.

"Why not?"

Katya fumbled for a moment looking for a good enough answer.

"We resurrected him. He's supposed to be a savior of our civilization. We aren't supposed to be fucking these people."

"He's a man, sweetheart," Ellen purposefully countered, now curious as to what Katya's response would be. "He's flesh and bone. She's a woman."

"You seem like you want it to be true."

"Well, it crossed my mind before I even sent her to Delta," Ellen admitted.

"What?"

"I could have easily asked Xao to do me the favor and go treat Sam, but it wouldn't have worked to calm him down. I know Sam Anders and I knew it would be a lot harder for him to turn away Tawny than some old man. She seems to have a way with him."

Katya turned onto her stomach and swore into the pillow with a huff.

"Kat, why do you care, exactly?"

"I don't."

Ellen narrowed her eyes. She put her hand onto Katya's back. Something wasn't right. She couldn't let it go. She had to say something.

"I'm worried about you and Lex, kitten."

Katya pushed up on the bed again.

"Don't be," She snapped but Ellen wasn't fazed by her sudden venom.

"Why shouldn't I be? I see how distracted and busy you two are. Now he's out drinking and you're over here sulking about…what? Tawny and Sam? Why? What happened between you two?"

"I'm sulking?"

"Yes!"

Katya sat up all the way on the bed and straightened her posture.

"You don't have to worry about me and Lex, Aunt Ellen."

"But I do. I always will. You're my kids. I can't help it," She said with a resigned shrug. "You haven't been married a year yet, Katya. I know that you don't like hearing this but you two are so young. Alexi hasn't even had his twenty-second birthday yet. Sometimes I wonder if you two were really ready to cope with married life. Maybe Uncle Saul and I should have encouraged you to hold off."

Katya's anger flared.

"Ellen, how dare you question my marriage. You know that we…"

"I don't doubt your love for each other, kitten," Ellen interrupted, attempting to snuff out Katya's growing temper. "I never have. Not at all. I've been able to sense it in you both for years. I know how deep that love is. But I also know how deeply I love Uncle Saul and I would hate to see you two hurt each other the way he and I did for so long."

Katya shook her head. Things were out of control. She hardly knew anything for certain but she knew that she loved her husband.

"I love Alexi. I love him and nothing will ever change that. He's the only person in my life whose love I've never had to question for a moment. Do you understand that? Over the years I've had to ask myself if my father ever really loved me. I even doubted you and Uncle Saul when you first took me in. There has only been one person in my life whose love I've never questioned for a moment and that's Alexi. You don't need to worry about my marriage, Aunt Ellen. That's one thing in my life I'm not afraid to lose. I love him and even death couldn't take that away from me," Katya finished with stinging tears in her eyes.

Ellen nodded over and over in understanding. She reached out and squeezed Katya's hand in apology.

"I'm sorry, kitten. You're right."

"I'm just giving him time to cool down over a stupid misunderstanding. I can go back to my cabin if you want. I'm not here just because of Lex. I wanted to be with you more than I wanted to be away from him."

"Okay. Okay, kit. I'm sorry. You know that I just want to see you happy."

Katya let her temper fade and after a moment her shoulders fell limp.

"Happy," She echoed quietly.

"Yes, happy," Ellen answered, forcing a smile.

Katya licked at her lips.

"I'd settle for not being scared," She whispered.

It broke Ellen's heart.

"I wish I could take that fear away, Kat. For all of you. I hate that you've never lived without it."

Katya scooted back so that her shoulders rested on the rack wall. She let her eyes settle on some random spot in the room.

"Nothing's happening, is it, Aunt Ellen? Roslin, the Admiral, Sam, Helo…all of them. It didn't work. We needed Alexi's parents. Didn't we?"

Ellen hated hearing the fear and desperation in Katya's voice but at least she understood it. When Saul brought up the girl's strange behavior it was fear that Ellen had blamed it on. Maybe she'd been right. Maybe it was all coming from a life lived in trepidation.

"We don't know that yet," She said as she reached out and put a hand on Katya's knee.

It didn't work to regain the young woman's focus. She still looked so far away as she spoke.

"Then why is everything getting worse instead of better?"

Ellen took a deep breath in. She didn't have much of an answer for her.

"Sometimes life almost has to shatter before it can even start to get better. I've seen it before."

Katya finally gave Ellen her eyes.

"You've seen so much."

"Yeah, kitten. I have."

Katya nodded and then paused in what looked like contemplation.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything, baby."

"You've seen people die and then resurrect...leave this side and come back. You've lived your own life about four times over."

"I guess I have," Ellen offered.

"In all that time did you ever witness someone come back totally different?"

Ellen sat up in bed as she considered the question. She thought for a moment before answering.

"Well, I've told you how John really frakked with my recall when he put me on the Colonies. I had memories of a family that never existed, memories of places I never lived, friends I never had. And all of my true memories were missing; Earth, my father, being married for the first time, Uncle Saul and the life and careers we once built together. It was all lost. I was still myself but John took away a lot of the good in me. I was me during my life on the Twelve Colonies but I wasn't all of me," Ellen explained. "But those parts were there. They were just hidden and when I came back the next time I was myself again. I truly felt like me again."

"No…no," Katya said shaking her head. She cringed partly because she hated hearing all that Ellen had been through and partly because she knew that she wasn't explaining herself correctly. She just didn't know how. "I guess I don't mean it like that."

"I don't understand."

"I don't know," Katya huffed with some frustration. "Did you ever…" She hesitated and started over with a more specific example. "Did you ever see a cylon's consciousness come back to a different body?"

Ellen looked perplexed but she nodded.

"They were all different, sweetie. That's how it worked. Their bodies died and so they needed new ones, different ones that were new and healthy."

"No. What I mean is, could the consciousness of, let's say a Six, ever be downloaded into the body of a maybe an Eight? Even by mistake, maybe? So that when they came back they didn't look or even feel like themselves?"

Ellen tilted her head. She didn't understand what Katya was getting at.

"No. No, we didn't design it that way. The body and the mind were connected. It's the way we configured it. It seemed like the right thing to do back then. Believe me, there was a time when I tried to find a way around it. It didn't work."

Katya paused. She looked up at the other women and found pain in her eyes.

"You mean with Daniel?"

Ellen just nodded.

"You tried to bring him back?" Katya asked in a whisper. It was like she was afraid that saying it louder would hurt Ellen even more. "Without his body?"

She watched Ellen's eyes water and hated herself for a moment. She shouldn't have brought it up.

"I did. I tried…not for long but I tried," Ellen admitted.

Katya felt her face flush and her heart sink. She never could bear to hear Saul and Ellen speak of Liam or Daniel. The sadness that they both carried was too deep. She could only imagine how powerful the pain must have been to have lasted so very long.

"I'm sorry," She offered.

Ellen took a deep breath and went on.

"It was so hard to let him go. I realized pretty quickly that without his DNA, without his body there was no way to bring him back. I hadn't really left any loopholes for myself. John knew that. Daniel was gone…body…consciousness. He was just gone. All I had left was his memory…and I still have that," She said with a sad smile, forcing herself to compose her thoughts. "When the centurions found me and Uncle Saul down on the surface of this Earth I was confused. But when they took me to the basestar and I heard the hybrid's message about what we were meant to do I knew that she was telling me that human resurrection would be the same as I had designed it for cylons. That's why we had to go back to Galactica and get their DNA. I needed to clone those bodies to get the right people back," Ellen explained with finality. "I believe the mind and body are very much connected."

Katya nodded and then scooted away from the wall and closer to Ellen's side again.

"But…what about the soul?"

"The soul?"

"You said mind and body are connected so what about the soul? Is that the same?"

Ellen pondered the notion for a moment, confused as to what Katya meant.

"I dunno, baby. Why?"

"I…I don't know."

"Honey, why are you asking me all of this? Are you worried that Sam isn't who he says he is? Because as strange as he's acting, I can assure you, kitten, that's him."

"No. I know it's him. I was just thinking."

Katya lay back down against the pillow and the two rested quietly for a few moments.

"Aunt Ellen, why couldn't you clone Starbuck?"

Ellen yawned and stretched a bit before answering.

"You know, Kat. Her DNA sample wasn't viable."

"Why?"

Ellen rubbed at her temples. She and Saul had each told her the story dozens of times before.

"I still don't know. Uncle Saul and I couldn't figure it out. Le Blanc didn't know what the frak she was looking at. Kara's sample just didn't contain any identifiable genetic material. It was like it vanished from the actual blood."

"But how?"

"I don't know that either, Katya. We had it aboard the basestar for thousands of years. I suppose it didn't preserve like the others. Or maybe something happened to it before I ever got my hands on it. Maybe back on Galactica. Le Blanc and I worked on it for years. I honestly don't have a good explanation for it but I couldn't bring Kara back without her body. D'Anna was our next best option. Uncle Saul believed she was the right choice. We were wasting time trying to clone something from nothing. We had to give up on Starbuck." Ellen could remember the frustration and utter disappointment she'd felt when they finally had to accept that Kara wouldn't be brought back. "Look, Kat…I know that you're worried that we're missing Caprica and Kara and Baltar. I did what I could. And if that's what winds up failing us then I'll die with the weight of an entire people on my back. I should have gotten a better sample of Kara's DNA. I should have kept the bodies safe on Gamma Station. I should have done a lot of things differently, I guess. I'll die knowing that I was the one who failed if their absence truly ruins this…but I just don't believe that it will. I believe in the people who we did bring back. I believe that they can help in spite of all our setbacks and the way things seem right now. "

Ellen spoke as confidently and steadily as she could. Deep down she knew that all of the confidence in the galaxy probably couldn't convince the twenty-two year old war ravaged mind beside her to believe, but she would never stop trying to give her hope.

"What if we never get back down to Earth?"

"Katya, I've told you a hundred times. I didn't hang around for all this time just to lose. I need you to trust me. I'm promising you," She insisted, forcefully taking hold of one of Katya's hands. "Remember what I told you? We have plans, baby. When we get down there I'm taking you to a real honest to gods beach. Real sand, real sunshine and you'll see how our projections, as special as they have been, could never do such a place justice. I'm going to watch you in the water for the very first time with a smile on my face. That will be my reward."

Katya was silent for a few long moments. She finally replied when Ellen gave her hand another firm squeeze.

"I won't know how to swim," She said in a small voice..

Ellen lowered her brow for a moment in thought and then shook her head.

"Don't you worry about that, baby."

"Aunt Ellen?"

"Hm?"

"I'm so tired."

Katya's voice sounded a light-year away.

"Turn over," Ellen encouraged, giving her a gentle nudge. Out of years of habit Katya turned onto her stomach right away. Ellen began to soothingly rub at her back. After a few moments she began to speak again abandoning all talk of resurrections and hypotheticals. "I'm inviting Bill and Laura to dinner on New Year's Day." As she said the words she felt the tendons in Katya's back immediately tense up. "Maybe Sharon and Helo too," She added to help smooth over her unexpected announcement.

"You're inviting Laura? Here?"

"Yes," Ellen answered casually as if Katya had no reason to be surprised.

"Why? So you two can ruin the holiday for everyone?" Katya accused, attempting to lean up on her forearms.

"We won't," Ellen insisted. She gently pushed the girl back down against the mattress and continued caress her shoulders. "You have my word."

Katya was silent and Ellen couldn't help but test her reaction.

"Don't you want her here, kit?"

Katya rolled her eyes and nuzzled her face deeper into the pillow.

"Is that a trick question?" She mumbled.

"No, sweetie. It's not," Ellen answered as she ran her fingers in a figure eight across Katya's back. "It'll be like every year. Just family."

"Just family."

Ellen smiled at the girl's repetition.

"Yup."

Katya nodded without a word. She remembered how Laura had made her a similar pledge of peace just a night before. She wondered what could have possibly changed for both women. At first she thought it would be strange to have the added guests present during a ritual Tigh family gathering but the more she thought about it the more relieved she became that they wouldn't all be apart.

"Lex and I have something for you and Uncle Saul," She said after a while.

"Oh yeah? A gift?"

"Sort of," Katya shrugged. The idea of a larger guest list was growing on her but she wanted a private moment with her parents to share the secret that she and Alexi still kept. They owed Saul and Ellen that. "Is it okay if we set aside some time before everyone comes over?"

"Sure, kitten. We'll have a toast, just the four of us before everyone comes over. How's that?"

"Yeah. Okay."

Ellen stopped her fingers from roaming the expanse of Katya's back and instead started to play with her hair. She twirled long silky locks through her fingers and braided and unbraided little sections as she lay there. It was something she'd done since Katya was young. It had started as a way to familiarize herself the with the chore of managing the little girl's hair. After Katya's adoption Ellen suddenly had the task of getting her ready every morning for school and fixing her hair in various styles for ballet lessons and performances. She would practice when Katya was quiet and still; either reading, watching videos or playing games on the network. She would brush and dry her hair after showers and braid it before bedtime. Soon Ellen had mastered the art but she still so often found herself twirling and playing with Katya's hair as they watched movies with each other on the sofa or as she read to her at night before bed. It had become a comforting habit for both of them. It still was.
One day Ellen realized that Katya had picked up the habit. It was evident in the way she brushed and played with Laura's hair in the lab during times when her body was out of stasis. Ellen had tried to ignore it back then. She couldn't deny the connection anymore.

"Oh and something else, baby…I want you and Lex to go to the New Year's Eve party at Senchi tomorrow night."

Katya didn't answer. For a moment Ellen thought that she might have already fallen to sleep.

"Kit? Did you hear me?"

Katya finally groaned into the mattress showing her utter annoyance with the request.

"Yes. I heard you and I have no desire to spend the first moments of the new year in a crowded bar. Especially one filled with dozens of drunken soldiers who don't know if they're going to live to see more than a week of it."

"Don't talk like that, Kat."

"It's true. It's depressing. I don't want to watch people drinking to forget our grim future or lack thereof."

"You can't think that way. You have to celebrate and be hopeful."

"I want to be hopeful, Aunt Ellen. You don't know how much."

Alexi had been dead on with his earlier accusations and Katya was ashamed. No matter how relieved and happy she was to hear Tawny's news that morning she didn't honestly believe that there would be a future long enough to enjoy it.

"I wish I saw more of a reason to be," She admitted.

"C'mon. You kids deserve a night of fun and I want to see you all enjoying one another's company."

Katya shook her head in defiance.

"I don't want to. Besides, we'll miss Margot."

"No you won't.," Ellen insisted. "You won't have to."

"Huh?"

Ellen sighed.

"At 0700 I have a shuttle to the basestar. I'm taking Sydra with me. We aren't coming back without her. I promise you that she'll be here tomorrow night. Even if I have to get two centurions to drag her off of that frakking ship kicking and screaming. She needs her family. She's not doing any good to anyone over there. I'm removing her for her own good."

"And what's Sydra supposed to be? Bate?"

"In a way," Ellen admitted. "Margot loves her. I want to show her that she isn't just punishing herself."

"If she thinks that you're going to make her see Anders and D'Anna she'll never come."

"I have no intention of doing that, Kat. I'm done forcing anymore familial connections. We both know that doesn't work. It has to happen on its own. Doesn't it?"

Katya ignored the implication. Ellen seemed to be showcasing her new acceptance of Laura and she didn't know how to respond to it yet.

"Are you still keeping what D'Anna did from the others?" She asked.

Ellen sighed and lay down beside her daughter cuddling up at her back.

"There still isn't any reason to let the military know, sweetie. I'm sorry to ask you to lie to Cmdr. Kaplan, but I can't see it doing any good."

"I guess."

"But Uncle Saul did tell Bill today."

"He did?"

"Mmhm. I'm sure that Laura will know soon enough and I'm going to tell Sharon that she doesn't have to keep it from Helo anymore. It won't change anything but it's not fair to ask that of her anymore. He's her husband."

"It's hard keeping secrets from people that you love," Katya yawned.

Ellen nodded into her hair and gave her a knowing kiss on the back of her head.

"I'm having Margot's things sent here from Delta. I've arranged a temporary spot for her in the barracks but she's welcome to stay here in your old room if she wants. She won't be in any trouble for neglecting her duty on Delta since she was on the basestar under my authority. Kaplan will find a spot for her. She's a valuable asset. It's all settled. I'll bring her back, kit."

"If you say so. Good luck."

"You'll go then? You'll go have a good time at Senchi if I promise she'll be there?"

"I'll talk to Alexi," Katya relented.

"That's my girl," Ellen said with a smile. "I think it will be good for you. You'll get dressed up and dance. It could be the last time any of us get to for a while. Maybe we should all embrace it," She considered with a yawn of her own.

"I'm tired," Katya mumbled once again.

"I know, baby. Ya know, you've been actively blocking me for so long now. I would think that you'd be exhausted all of the time just keeping that up. It takes so much energy. With everything else you have to do you shouldn't be wasting your efforts on hiding...just…please promise me it's not always going to be like this."

"I promise."

It was strange but Ellen believed her.

"Goodnight, my baby."

"Spoki," Katya sleepily answered as she drifted off.

Ellen smiled to herself. From the time Katya was a child she would sometimes get her linguistics confused when she was overtired. Ellen always found it adorable whether she understood what she was saying or not. She gave the girl another kiss, this time to the temple. She said a silent prayer that Katya would find comfort by her side all night and rest well within a dreamless sleep.

Katya did rest. She never so much as stirred or turned under the sheets. For once her mind slumbered with her body.

Though Ellen's prayers for her child were answered she didn't sleep as soundly herself. She took on all of Katya's worries and fears. She absorbed every promise and vow that she'd made and it all followed her into her sleep. For a night Ellen was the one who dreamed.

It started pleasantly at first. It was almost welcome. She was even aware that she was dreaming, that the space that she was in wasn't real. At least it hadn't been for millennia. She was relaxing in her favorite spot; the pebbled beach under the warm amber sun. She lay on a lounge chair as usual, soaking in the last of the afternoon rays. By her side Katya sat atop a red blanket. She appeared not as a young women but as Ellen had first met her; no more than seven years old. She looked as sweet and innocent as she had back when Ellen first started projecting the space for her. It used to calm her fits and ease her fears and Ellen had always been so happy to share it. Ellen thought it strange to see Katya so young. Occasionally they would still project the special shoreline together. Now that Katya was grown they would each take in the artificial sun and simply relax side by side. At first Ellen was puzzled as to why Katya would appear to her as a child but as she watched the girl playing with some beach toys looking happy and content she found that she no longer cared to contemplate it. She was glad to have her baby by her side.

Soon the late day sun became too bright. Ellen squinted against the powerful glow. She tried to change the scene, willing the projection to adjust to her liking but it didn't work. She then remembered that she wasn't projecting at all. This time it was a dream and she had no control over the sun or its rays. She closed her eyes and hoped that a cloud might roll in soon to mute the harsh glare. After a few moments she felt a light tapping at her sun-warmed shoulder.

"Can I go collect shells?" A little voice asked at her side.

Ellen shielded her brow from the light with her hand and looked up at the sweet face peering down at her. Katya was almost a silhouette against the glowing sky.

"You're done playing, kitten?" Ellen asked.

Her projection of the beach had been Katya's first exposure to an ocean shore. Besides pictures on the network she hardly understood what one was before seeing Ellen's creation. At first it had been enough for the little girl to just sit and marvel at the view. She loved to play in the sand and feel its alien texture against her skin. Eventually Ellen added little beach toys to the projection so that Katya had something more to occupy herself with. Those first few precious times it was more than ample to keep the child's attention but soon she'd asked to explore. Eventually Ellen decided to project dozens of sea shells along the shore for Katya to find and collect. The little girl, born in Orbit, had never seen anything like them. She found joy in gathering the specimens in a little bucket and bringing them back to the blanket show off. In the safety of her fantasy scene Ellen could let Katya wander with no fear of threatening waves or menacing strangers.

"I'm not done," The girl explained. "I'm making a spaceship out of sand. I want to find a starfish for it."

"A ship? So then why do you need a starfish, honey?" Ellen said with apparent amusement.

"Because it's a basestar," Katya answered confidently.

Ellen laughed at the clarification and shook her head at the girl's sweet precociousness.

"Well, that sure explains it," She teased. For a moment she squinted harder trying to see the detail of Katya's face against the sun. She always loved to compare the blue of her eyes with the blue of the ocean. The light was still too bright. "Go ahead, baby. Have fun."

She smiled as the girl ran off with her bucket and then eased herself back against the lounge chair.

After what seemed like a quite a while Ellen finally felt the sun start to fade and dip below the clouds. She opened her eyes and found that she could see much better. A quick look around showed no sign of Katya. She couldn't see her by the shoreline or up by the dunes. She even checked the surf, though she knew that Katya would never dare go into any body of water without her, real or otherwise. Ellen called out for her, sure that the girl would appear when she heard her name. When she didn't reply Ellen began to worry. The sun seemed to be lowering down to the horizon far too quickly. She tried to stop it. When it didn't work her heart sank. She remembered for a second time that it wasn't her projection. She had no control. Had there even been shells on the shore for Katya to find? An oppressing sense of foolishness and guilt consumed Ellen's whole being. Suddenly her peaceful shore felt foreign and treacherous. The sun continued to set. She called for her daughter again and again as the light proceeded to fade. She scoured the beach back and forth. She kept shouting for the girl even when her throat was raw. When the sky was finally black she fell to her knees. Katya was gone. She paid no mind to the rocks and broken shells within the sand that dug into her flesh as she let herself cry for her baby.

E-Fed Translations

Nyet- No

Dah- Yes

"Dah, malysh. GaDsi'tsah." -Yes babe, that's good

"Okei. Poost buDzet poTvohyemuh, myshka." -Okay as you wish, my little mouse.

"Spokoineh noche, Vladi," She mumbled – Goodnight, Vladi

"Porshai, mamochka." – Goodbye, mama.

"Porshai, Vladi,"- Goodbye, Vladi.

"Katya look at me. What's going on? Schtoh sluchilys? What's wrong?" -Whats the matter?

Lubuv moya- My love

Alexi zatknis'! Zakroi rot!- Shut up! Shut your mouth!

"Prastinitye, Katya. Go on. Speak then." –I'm sorry.

"Ya tebya lyublyu, malysh." - I love you, baby.

"Myshka lyublyu tebya vsem sertsem, vs'ey dushOyu. I love you with everything I have." - I love you with all of my heart, all of my soul.

"Spasibo, malysh. Spasibo, pasiki. Pozhaluysta, ne ostanavlivaysya ." -Thank you, my love, Thank you thank you don't stop.

Pod'yom!" He barked rather harshly. – Get up!

"Alexi, prosti , detka, ya ne khotel vas obidet!" -I'm sorry baby I never meant to hurt you.

"Spoki"- G'night.

E-Rep Translations

Juéjiàng – stubborn.