I Do Not Own CSI
"So," Chris spoke as he and Sara sat at the breakfast nook at Grissom's townhouse.
"So."
"I don't know where to begin," Chris sighed, rubbing his head in his hands.
"How about we go back; back to the day where I told you to leave."
"You sure you want to rehash all this?"
"I think in order for me, and you, to move on, we need to. If we ever want to have some semblance of a relationship we need to lay our past to rest, or as much of it as we can," Sara spoke, thinking back to when she was thirteen years old.
"Sara" Chris spoke, knocking on her bedroom door of her new foster parent's home. He smiled softly when he saw her knee deep in Moby Dick.
"Chris! You came!"
"Yeah. How you doing in this one?"
"Ok, the Jameson's seem to be like a nice couple. Mr. Jameson let's me raid his bookcase for something new to read when I'm bored."
"That's good. Sara, can we talk?"
"Sounds pretty serious."
"It is," Chris spoke, sitting down on her bed.
"Is it about mom? Have you heard anything lately? No one will tell me about her, I can't even go see her anymore."
"She's been moved from the hospital to a prison cell. I went and saw her last week. She's not well, Sara."
"All the more reason we should go see her. She protected us, Chris, I want to see her."
"I know, Sara, but I think it might be for the best if you stayed away for awhile."
"But-"
"Sara, trust me, ok."
"And I did trust you," Sara spoke to Chris, a few stray tears forming in her eyes.
"I really was trying to protect you. Mom really was pretty messed up. And if you thought seeing her in the psych hospital was bad, prison was worse on her."
"But that should have been my decision to make."
"You were only thirteen, Sara. You were so young."
"I was old enough to make my own decisions."
"I don't think anyone, me included, knew the genius that you were yet," Chris spoke, making Sara form a small smile.
"And then you told me that you were joining the army."
"So, what's this big serious matter you want to talk to me about? Wait, you turned eighteen last week! Are you breaking me out of here, taking me away from strange families? We could live together, and I can go to school, and we can live a normal life."
"Sara-"
"And we could get a dog."
"Sara-"
"I promise, I'll take care of it, even pick up its poop. We could live in an apartment."
"Sara," Chris said a little louder, stopping Sara's rambling.
"What?"
"I have something to talk to you about, and you're not going to like it."
"Suffice it to say, I was surprised when you blurted out that you were joining the army."
"I didn't want it to come out that way. I had it planned all in my head, so that you wouldn't think I was just abandoning you."
"I don't think it would have mattered how you said it, I still felt abandoned," Sara spoke as she and Chris both moved into the living room. Sara curled herself up in the corner of the couch as much as she could; her belly was already making it difficult to pull her legs up all the way.
"Pretty soon, you're not going to be able to do that," Chris spoke as Sara shot him a look.
"Sorry"
"Don't worry about it. Gil and I just came completely out at the lab last week after Hodges of all people noticed the ring on my finger. The lab rats were gracious enough to not say anything about my expanding waistline even though it's fairly obvious I'm pregnant," Sara said softly.
"I never asked you; what made you join the army?"
"I wasn't in a good place when I aged out, even before then."
"You always seemed ok."
"To you, I did, but a lot of that was a farce."
"You could have told me."
"You didn't need to deal with my problems, too. The foster house I was staying in, the foster dad was an old marine, he thought that with routine and discipline a troubled child could set their future straight. Kind of like when a drug addict gets clean, they need routine, procedure, and someone to keep them in line. He suggested the army to me, said it might help me. I could go to college, and serve the big man all at the same time."
"But I was your family."
"It wasn't the same, Sara. You may have been stubborn, but I needed someone to kick my ass. But I didn't want to tell you I was joining the army the way I did"
"So what's so important that you need to say?" Sara spoke, as she held her knees close to her chest.
"I'm leaving, joining the army."
"What? No, you're supposed to get me out of foster care," Sara said, tears welling up in her big brown eyes.
"I can't, Sara. I went downtown yesterday and signed up. I leave for Fort Bragg in a couple days."
"No, no, Chris! What am I supposed to do?"
"I'm sorry, Sara, but I need to leave."
"No, you don't! We can be together. We can be a family, just us!"
"I'm so sorry, Sara."
"Fine," Sara said, quickly putting on a brave face, wiping her tears and standing.
"What?"
"I said fine, leave."
"I don't want to, Sara."
"But you are anyway. So leave, go through that door and board that bus, and make a new family. I'll live, I'll survive. I always do," Sara said, whispering the last part out.
"But just know this, Chris."
"What?"
"You leave, don't come back."
"Sara, I don't want this to be the end. You're still my sister."
"But you're not my brother. You're just abandoning me like everyone else in this world has," Sara said through sobs.
"I don't want to see you again, Chris," Sara said just before leaving her room and entering the bathroom and slamming the door. Her sobs could be heard from the hall.
"I love you, Sara! Don't forget that," Chris said from the other side of the closed door. Not hearing anything in return, he left.
"I think I suffered my first real broken heart that day," Sara spoke as she looked Chris in the eye. Both of them had visible tear streaks coming down their faces.
"Me, too," Chris agreed.
"I didn't mean it, when I told you to never come back. I was just angry."
"You were so serious. I always wanted to have you in my life, Sara."
"Why didn't you try and find me?"
"I did, once. I came back to San Francisco a few years later and tried to find you. The foster care people wouldn't tell me much because I had changed my name. They didn't believe me when I told them who I was or that you were my sister. So, I tried another way, I went back to the last foster home I saw you in. I was lucky that the foster parents remembered me. They told me that you were in college. That as soon as you got an early acceptance, you emancipated yourself and left."
"I did. I thanked the family I was staying with for not shipping me off for the last three years I was in the system and left without a second glance backwards. I needed to start my own life."
"And you did."
"I tried to."
"You did, Sara. Just look at you know. Your successful, you're getting married, and starting your own family. That's more than I ever accomplished in the army."
"It took a long time. Like you, I was a messed up kid. I still am a little messed up, but thanks to Gil, I've been slowly moving past what has kept me sad for so long."
"I'm glad you found someone who makes you happy, you deserve it." Chris cleared his throat and continued.
"I found out you went to Harvard," Chris stated, making Sara smile.
"Yeah, for a few years. I got a full ride scholarship. After I finished up there I went to Berkley to finish up my masters; that was another two years of school."
"You spent five years in universities?"
"Yeah. I wanted to get into forensics somehow. So I started off as an assistant coroner, like Gil, but decided I wanted to help people. So I transferred to the lab, as a CSI one. A few years later, after becoming a lever three, I went to a forensic conference."
"You've been together since you were twenty six?"
"No, but I've known him since I was twenty six. He helped me out a lot. A couple years later, Gil asked me to come to Vegas."
"And you've been together since you came to Vegas?"
"I wish," Sara laughed out.
"Gil and I played cat and mouse for a longer than we both care to admit. When I was ready for a relationship, he wasn't and vice versa. It wasn't until the end of May this year that we finally did something about us."
"And now everything is changing for you again."
"Yeah," Sara said, rubbing her belly with a smile.
"Chris?"
"Yeah?"
"Gil and I, were getting married next week, would you ah, like to come?"
"Are you sure?"
"I would like you to be there. I want a relationship with you again. Right now, we're on somewhat stable ground. And although I've not completely put our past together behind me, I really want too. So I think, you attending my wedding, is a good second step in rebuilding."
"Then I would love to come, Sara. As long as Gil is alright with it, too."
"He was the one who suggested that I should try and rebuild our relationship. He's ok with you coming."
"Where and when?"
"Next Saturday at one o'clock, here. You don't have to bring anything other than yourself."
"I'll be here, Sara," Chris said as he squatted on the floor in front of where she sat.
"Thank you, for giving me a chance to be a brother again."
"Thank you for letting me be a sister again," Sara said, a genuine smile gracing her lips.
TBC
A little more insight into Chris and Sara's background. There will be more back story later.
Thanks for all who have reviewed! Keep them coming!
Katie
