Dear Brooke,

I've never been very good with words. This letter will be a mess and I probably won't get across what I'm feeling. But they keep telling me its the a way to deal with things. There are about 2 tree's worth of scrunched up paper surrounding me at this moment. And this is the best opening I've got. Its tragic I know but it's all I've got. So...I hope your well. I saw you in a magazine. Nobody believed me when I said I knew you. It's okay though because they already think I'm crazy. Sorry for the lame attempt at a joke. Anyway I hope you're good.

I'm writing to say I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the way I treated you, I'm sorry for what I said. I know now you were trying to help me. I just couldn't see it. I got angry, I thought you were. I don't know what I thought. I just wanted to be with you I still do. I understand now though, that you did it because you love me. You saved me Brooke.

Being in this place has helped me see that I was wrong about a lot of things but not you. You are the love of my life and always will be. You have to know I could never really hate you. I was angry and I pushed you away. I pushed you too far and in doing that I broke you. It's the biggest regret of my life that I hurt you. But I'll never regret what we had. I loved you more than anything. I think it's possible I loved you too much. Sometimes it physically hurt. That's not your fault though. You see I wasn't ready for you. I've never known anything but betrayal and pain. And there was always a part of me waiting for you to leave me. I knew I wasn't good enough for you. I don't think I ever will be but I'm going to try.

In the centre there's this speaker system and it plays the radio. Its cheesy mainstream stuff that I usually hate. But it's all I've listened to for the last month so I've actually grown to like it. A few songs only. I've always related songs to everything and now as I sit here I realise what I must do. I could never some it up in my own words so I've chosen these. This is my promise:

There's nothing I could say to you
Nothing I could ever do to make you see
What you mean to me
All the pain, the tears I cried
Still you never said goodbye and now I know
How far you'd go
I know I let you down
But it's not like that now
This time I'll never let you go
I will be, all that you want
And get myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart
All my life, I'll be with you forever
You're the one thing I got right
The only one I let inside
Now I can breathe, cause you're here with me
Without you I can't sleep
I'm not gonna ever, ever let you leave
You're all I've got, you're all I want
Yeah
Cause without you I don't know what I'd do
I can never, ever live a day without you
Here, with me, do you see,
You're all I need
And all my life, you know I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything okay

It's Leona Lewis I will be. It's not the whole song so you should listen to it, I couldn't write it all down. When ever I hear it I think of you. I'm going to wait for you. It's my promise that I'm going to be the person you deserve. I don't expect anything from you. I've let you down too many times. But I'm going to wait for you. I'll wait forever. Forever and a day, remember. One day with you would be worth waiting my whole life. If ever you need me I'll be there. I want to be your rock, I want to be your safe place. I want to be your everything. Because you're mine. I loved you. I Love you. I will always love you. You're the past, the present, the future. You're my everything.

Love Peyton