Nepeta/Equius (Pale): Mò Míng Qí Miào (Chinese), Technically, Something So Strange Or Mysterious That It Is Hard To Articulate Just What It Is, Colloquiually Used In Terms Of "What The Fuck Was That"
Note: I have been told since writing this that mò míng qí miào is colloquiually used in a 'wtf even just happened' sense rather than the more formal, literal interpretation. On the one hand, I am always excited to hear about these little subtle things with languages, and on the other I'm irritated that I wrote this thing with a more serious tone instead of incorporating the sillier, more fun use of the phrase. It's a real shame I didn't get to use that interpretation of that phrase, but oh well! I hope this little story is enjoyable anyways.
You don't get it. You really don't get it. Because Equius, okay? He's a troll you know, and you guess you're basically furrends, though he's really weird, and he's sweaty and gross and he's just dummbbbb with all the hemocaste crap. But he seems to always be okay with talking to you, and even when you hate hate hate dealing with people and you need to be alone for a while, you find yourself checking to see if he's online. The two of you talked through the day once, and then the next night you were out hunting with your mom and fell asleep up in a tree waiting for antlerbeasts to come by. That was really embarrassing, but you stay up way too late talking to him all the time.
And now, in purrson, you don't get it even more. Because hearing from your friends that he's sweaty is different from seeing it yourself (you think half his sylladex is just packed with towels, what the hell). And even if he sounded kinda stilted online, it's a whole other thing to see him holding himself all stiff and formal and trying to act all noble or whatever when you're just a bunch of kids and you know he's just as ridiculous as you are. By all accounts, you should hate him.
But it's really different, and it's really weird to catch yourself noticing how well his face would fit into your hands, and you know how strong he is and it makes you painfully conscious of how carefully he handles you. And the stupid way he talks doesn't make you angry or want to leave or anything like that. It makes you want to laugh and tease him (gently!) into being something better. You want to find all the secret parts of him that he's trying to purrtend aren't there and get him to tell you everything, absolutely everything. You need all his secrets, but only if he gives them to you because he wants to, not just because you want him to. And what's terrifying, what's really fucking terrifying, is that you want to give all your secrets to him too.
You're trying to ignore this whatever-it-is, because it's new and scary and you don't understand what's going on, and because it might hurt, but it'll be easier if he doesn't feel the same way about you. And it's so frustrating, because you need him so badly, but you don't know him well enough to read him and see if he needs you back. It works out in the end, with you lost and furrightened the whole way. But you fit perfectly into his lap, and your hands fit just right around his horns, and he even lets you touch his broken horn, and it's so vulnerable of him that you're completely terrified the whole time.
He tells you in the end, once you're tucked up in a makeshift pile of broken robots and furbeast skins, that he was just as frightened and needed you just as badly. And both of you agree that you're completely lost. But it's purrfect, so purrfect, even if you're both nervous and confused and have no idea of what you're supposed to be doing. You can put a diamond to it, because that's what these feelings mean, right? But neither of you would be able to explain any better than that, and in the end, with both of you wrapped tight around each other, you don't really think that it matters.
