Chapter 29

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Thank you Phoebe for editing this chapter

and do please read the AN below

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Flashback

"Hey." She heard someone calling her name. She turned around and saw a pink haired woman calling her name.

"Hello." She answered back.

"What are you going to do this summer? I know we only get a week off and you are always doing volunteer jobs in the camp. I am wondering if you want to come with me and my friend to the beach."

She had been in the army for two years and every holiday, she always spent it on the camp. She never took her vacation time and she never thought someone really paid any attention to her. She was surprised when she heard this pink haired woman knew that she always stayed in the camp.

"I can't." She told the pink haired woman.

"It is boring to spend the summer in the camp. We can pick up boys and have fun before we have to work again."

"I would love to go with you, but this year I am going to visit someone." She could see the surprised look that the pink haired woman had on her face. Was it really that weird for her to have friends?

"I am sorry, I thought you didn't have plans, that's why I asked you." The woman looked very guilty, but it was understandable because she wasn't talking to anyone on personal level, she just kept being polite to everyone around her. "I am sorry once again and I will be going now."

"Maybe you can ask me this winter to go with you?" She found herself saying that before the pink haired woman left the room. Maybe after all this time she tried to keep herself away from anyone, she had longed for someone to talk to.

And she found herself seeing a wide smile on the pink woman's face as she ran and went to hug her.

"I will make sure to ask you. We will be going to this New Year's party and it will be worth your time. I promise."

"I can't wait." She told the pink haired woman. She knew that this winter, she would be spending her time alone in a hotel at whichever city she would be stationed at that year. Maybe going to the party with this pink haired woman wouldn't be that bad.

"This is the first time you've taken the vacation, where are you going?" The pink haired woman asked her.

"To visit someone." She said sadly. The pink haired woman looked at her with confusion on her face but she knew that woman could see that she didn't want to be asked anymore about whom she might visit.

"Hey, you." She heard someone calling the two of them. She turned around and saw a tan-skinned male standing in the doorway. The pink haired woman almost immediately ran to that man as she went to jump onto him. "I am not here for you." She heard the man say to the pink haired woman.

"It is not the time to leave, yet?"

"No." He told her. "There is a helicopter waiting for you." He said as he turned his attention to her.

"A helicopter?" She repeated his words. She remembered that he told her that he will send someone to pick her up, but he wouldn't send a helicopter into a military base, right?

"Just told by the boss to get you." He told her as he gave her a piece of paper and she saw that it was a message from the person she was about to meet. He wrote to her that he will fly her directly to where he was at that moment and that they will attend dinner with his father.

"This is the first time I've seen someone have a helicopter as her ride. Are you rich?" She heard him asking her. She shook her head as she grabbed her bag and went to exit the room. She could feel the pink haired woman curiously look in her direction.

"I am not rich." She said almost immediately, but she held back before she continued with telling them that her lover was the one that send the helicopter. They didn't need to know that much about her life. "I am guessing that my acquaintance sent me a helicopter in order to make me arrive on time to our destination."

She was already walking towards the helicopter when the tanned male sent the female a suspicious look her way. And the female that was standing next to him got curious as she looked back between the female who just left and her male friend.

"Why are you looking at her like that?" The pink haired female asked her friend.

"To be able to send a helicopter to a military base and somehow get the permit to do so, she has a powerful friend." The male said as turned to leave the room. He still needed to continue with his errand for the day and his superior just had to tell him to relay the news to the woman.

-x-

"You sent a helicopter to a military base." She told her lover, first thing when she saw him. As she expected, he looked very handsome with his perfectly tailored tux and the way he styled his hair.

"Is there a problem?" He asked, rather surprised.

"Yes. It is a military base. People will talk."

"You are not going to be there much longer. I don't see the problem if people will ask and try to find out about your background."

"I got into special force. And I intend to take up the offer." She told him. At first, she thought of discussing it with him, since it meant she would leave the country and head to the real war. And that meant the possibility of her getting killed. But if she succeeded, she would make a name for herself and would be able to stand next to her lover proudly.

"I won't allow that." He told her. She could see his facial expression change, he was irritated.

"This is my life and I am allowed to do what I want. I am only informing you about my decision." She said with the same determination as before. She really couldn't believe that the first thing they did when they meet was fight, when other couples would run into each other's arms. Then again, their relationship had never been normal from the beginning.

"I am not going to argue with you." He took a deep breath as if he was trying to calm himself. "Please just dress up and be ready."

She didn't know what to say. This was the first time she had heard him beg, and his expression before he left the door made her want to take back what she just told him.

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The maids showed her the way to a large hallway, and she still hadn't seen him since their fight. She was told by the maids that the young master would be waiting in the party room. 'I am confused, what party?' Then again, he never explained anything to her. They were together just to share each other's bed and when they became an official couple, they rarely communicated with each other. Were they even a couple? She couldn't recall the time they made things official between the two of them.

"If I may ask, what kind of party is this?" She asked one of the maids before she entered the room in front of her.

"I can't say, Miss." The maids looked at her, she knew the maid knew what party this was but couldn't tell. She understood how secrecy was one of the requirements to work in the line of her work. She took a deep breath as she opened the door.

Just to see a large ballroom in front of her. Many people talked and associated with each other and her eyes immediately tried to look and find the only person she knew in this room.

"Are you looking for someone?" She turned her head to see a pair of scarlet colored eyes looking directly into her ruby colored ones. She suddenly felt conscious of her surroundings as he gave his hand out, expecting her to put her hand on top of his.

"You." She answered as she took his hand. She expected to hear him laugh, or chuckle. But she could see his body was tense as he led her down the stairway. They stopped as they reached the bottom of the stairs and he pulled her closer to him. She could hear him whispering.

"I am sorry but I have to do this."

She blinked, expecting him to say something more, preparing herself for an explanation. But she never heard it since the sound from the party host completely caught her off guard.

"Presenting, Mr- and his fiancé."

-x-

-His Side-

He looked at the clock. Still showed 9 in the morning. Perhaps he needed to hurry things up as he had to greet his guests. The idea of meeting her after such a long time made him smile. He missed her, and it had been 2 years since the last time he saw her. He had begged her to come back to him once she had time. He knew she had avoided him for two years and every time she would have a holiday, he suggested that she come back home. Just to see him, even for a minute. And after two years, she finally agreed. He could almost jump from happiness when he heard her answer. He had planned to bring her to the most romantic places that he had researched for two years.

His little time to dream had to come to an end when he was called by his father. It was a rare occurrence that his father called him.

"It is nice to see you, father." He greeted his father. He hadn't seen his father for days.

"I want you to meet someone this evening. I have prepared a party for you and that person." His father told him. It was a usual thing in his life, that his father ordered him to do something and he had to oblige to his demands. But just for today, he couldn't have that. He had his days planned and prepared just to be with her.

"I have appointment this evening, father."

For the first time, he could see his father stop and turn to look to him. As he expected, his father's eyes were cold. There was a part of him that was scared of his father, but just for today he would be selfish and push his demand.

"Is it more important that meeting your fiancé?"

He was glad that his expression had been guarded. He was glad that he showed nothing when his father told him the sudden appearance of his fiancé. He had not mentioned to his father about the identity of his lover. Then who was this fiancé that his father has told him?

"I don't know what you are trying to say, father."

"I have met with her and her family. She has been raised in another country and I expect you to show her around the country before deciding your marriage date. I will announce your engagement to the young lady tonight."

"That would be rude to the lady, father." He told his father. He could feel his consciousness start to slip. He needed to remain calm, he needed to do this for her and he needed to make it work with her.

"Why is that?" His father asked him, challenging him to go against his authority.

"I am engaged to someone." He told his father. He clenched his fists as he tried keep his emotions in check. Losing his emotions against his father would not do him any good. It would not do her any good too. He knew what his father was capable of and that he might lose his lover. The idea of losing his lover to another person made him clenched his fists even tighter.

"And why I haven't been informed about this?" His father asked him.

"Because I have been busy with the company, father." He answered. It was true that since his lover went to the army, he had been focusing on his work to make his father proud of him and not question him on any other aspect of his life.

"Then bring this fiancé of yours." His father told him after being silent for few seconds. "This is your engagement party after all."

"Yes father." He said before he turned around to leave the room. He needed to think quick, how could he explain to his lover, the one that isn't even his girlfriend or spent a day going on a date with him, that she is his fiancé?

"One more thing." His father told him, stopping him in his tracks. "This doesn't mean I approve of your relationship with her."

-x-

She just blinked as numerous people congratulated her on her engagement. What engagement? Who?

She decided it was enough as she pulled him towards the empty part of the room. She knew eyes were following them and she could hear many people talking in low voices how the young couple needed to have their alone time. She just felt glad that the way he was looking at her made the people around them believe the two of them needed their alone time.

"Explain to me." She said sharply as she looked at him directly. "Why am I suddenly your fiancé when I am still struggling to understand the nature of our relationship?"

"We are together, does it matter what label we should put in our relationship?" He told her. She could feel her blood boil over how calm he looked. There was no doubt that she had feeling for him, he was the first and last thing on her mind every day. But did she love him?

"It matters." She told him as she watched the party behind him, some people gave them curious glances when she raised her voice. "I want this to be right. We are moving at an unbelievably fast pace and I am not sure I will be able to follow." She told him after trying to find a reason. Isn't it every girl's dream to have their loved one proposing to her? But they were barely talking to each other when he was in hospital two years ago and they just sent each other post cards while telling each other what they have been doing. And there is the matter of the nature of their relationship.

The last time she remembered, it was him asking her out on a date. And they had yet to go on this date. She tried to stop the voice in her head, saying that they didn't need a silly date to make their relationship official. They had been around each other for years, and she found herself asking the very same question as he did.

Did it matter what kind of label they put on their relationship?

She must have been in her little world for a long time, for she hadn't realize that he had leaned forward as he put his forehead on top of hers as he closed his eyes. She want to say something but she could feel the weight of his body as he lightly pushed her and she took two steps back and met with a wall behind them. She took a curious glance behind him, only to see the people had given her the knowing look of what they thought the pair was doing. She could feel her cheeks feeling hot as she gave a light tap to his shoulder.

"Don't." He whispered.

"People are looking." She told him.

"I don't care." She heard him say. She was shocked at how uncaring he seemed at their situation. "Because when we are leaving this room, you will leave me. Let me enjoy the last minute with you."

What? What had gotten into him? Where did he get the idea? She was surprised and still trying to understand the situation, but she never told him she would leave him.

"I am not going to leave you." She told him. They might need to talk, to shout, or maybe do something more before they could release the stress and tension between them. But if she wanted to leave him, it would be when they had met the dead end of their relationship. And looking back to how they were not successful at escaping each other, she doubted there would be a chance of her escaping him.

"I am not doing this right. You want to do the right thing." She heard him mumbling again. She tried to recall whether he had drunk something from the moment they were on the stairs to the moment the two of them in the secluded area of the room as they leaned against each other. He only drank the small amounts of drinks that surely wouldn't affect him in this way. What should she say to make him believe her?

She decided to not say anything as she kissed him, on the lips.

She could feel him stumbling backwards as if he tried to get away from her. She could see the shocked expression on his face as he opened and closed his eyes, trying to say something to her. He wanted to push her away but considering that the wall was behind her, he would not be able to physically do that. Instead he looked up as she finally watched an expression that she never thought she would see from someone like him.

Fear.

She didn't think of anything as she put her hand on his cheek and once again gave him a light kiss on his mouth. She wanted him to know that she will be there, that she would not leave him just because he rushed this relationship. This time, this made him regain his composure as she saw him smile, the same devilish smile she knew he had whenever he was up to something mischievous. The way he brought himself, as if he was someone that was entirely different from a few seconds ago.

"Little princess has grown." He told her as he pulled her into his arms, this time the two of them engaging in a pretty steamy make-out season. She was trying to push him back, at least she remembered where they were at that moment. She didn't dare open her eyes, she feared embarrassing herself by doing so, but she was glad that he had come back to his senses.

"I don't believe I taught you to be a hormonal teenager." She could hear a deep voice from where the two of them had been standing. She wanted to look up but her lover act faster than she did, pulling her into a hug and putting his hand protectively at the back of her head, preventing her from turning around to see the man behind her.

"I apologize, father." She heard him talking in a very calm manner. She took a peek and saw that he has a bit of her lipstick smeared at the corner of his lips. "But my fiancé just arrived only three hours earlier and we haven't seen each other in a long time. I just can't keep my hands away from her."

"Is that so?" His father said. She could hear the disgust in his voice and it remind her back from when they were in high school. His father always and only would see her as a disgusting gold digger. And it surprised her to see that his father had left the two of them alone until the party ended that day.

-x-

"It is rare for you to want to shop." She heard him ask her as the two of them walked through the expensive looking department store. She told him that she wanted to buy clothes since all she wore in the previous two nights were his clothes and she needed to meet with his mother tonight. She insisted on going alone, but he left no room for argument as he pulled her to his car and insisted on spending the day with her.

"I have to look good because I want your mother to change her impression about me." She said, her cheek slightly flushed pink at the memories from the previous day. The two of them were talking when one thing led to another on the sofa in the living room in his house. And at the same time, she opened her eyes, to see his mother staring directly into her eyes. She just screamed without thinking and it made him jump as if he was ready to attack the intruder, only to be faced with his mother.

She could remember how casually he greeted his mother, not caring the slightest bit about the situation he was in, or rather the situation they were both in. His mother, who clearly had a pretty calm expression just apologized for entering his house without knocking and wondered if he would like to meet with her for dinner the next day. But instead of looking to her son's eyes, his mother was looking directly to her eyes. She heard her lover accepting his mother's offer in her place as she saw his mother leaving the room.

"My mother loves you." He said confidently as he led her to one of the expensive looking stores in there. She saw the shop attendant greet them, and when they looked at him, the shop attendant just ran to close the door. More precisely, the shop attendant went to lock the shop.

"Make yourself comfortable. We are the only ones here." He told her as the shop attendant asked him if he wanted to drink and what kind of style he would prefer.

"You can't just tell someone to close the store." She told him. She had heard of the rich privilege but she thought it was only a joke that some people made in order to mock the rich people.

"Don't worry, they will make the same amount of money as the amount we are going to spend. Probably much more than they will make in a month. And I didn't ask them, they just assumed I needed privacy."

"I am not going to spend that much money." She told him. She would drain much of the money in her bank account to buy a suitable attire. But she was not going to spend her entire fortune on one dinner.

"Who said you were going to pay?" He gave her a look that left no room for argument as the shop attendant lead her to the changing room, asking what kind dress she wanted and what kind of style she preferred. She failed to see the smile on his lips, as he was glad that she had been accepting him as his fiancé and not leaving him.

-x-

A few hours later and much more shopping bags inside the trunk of his car, they finally drove back to his parents' house to meet with his mother. He still used the same shirt that he had worn since morning and she looked very out of place with her extravagant dress. She argued that it was too much but he just brushed her aside, telling her that she looked gorgeous in that dress.

"I hope you are not busy, coming in such a short notice." She heard his mother rushing down the stairs, with a dress that looked as extravagant as hers. For the first time she could see, his mother was a gorgeous lady.

"Thank you for having me." She answered as she let his mother lead her to the dining room, with him following from behind them with a smile on his face.

They were seated at a large dining table with him seated in front of his mother and her seated next to him. She saw the empty chair at the end of the table, she assumed it should have been for his father, who was absent for today's dinner.

"I would like to apologize for not being able to attend to your engagement party. My son never told me that he had been seeing someone. My husband was quite taken aback when he was told that my son had his eyes on someone." His mother said with a light chuckle. She couldn't sense any dislike towards her from his mother, she looked like she had a kind-hearted soul.

"We were not planning to telling you this suddenly too, mother." Her lover told his mother. Even she wasn't prepared to hear about this too, and she was supposed to be engaged to him.

"I was thinking of giving you a surprise visit in the morning. But the surprise was on me." She choked on her water as soon as his mother said this. She could feel tears coming from her eyes as the water manage to find its way into her nose as she cough even louder. Her lover gifted her a napkin as she put the said napkin to cover her nose and her mouth and she could feel his hand giving a light pat on her back. After few seconds, she was finally able to stop coughing as she looked into his mother's direction. The very same mischievous glints from her eyes made her sure that she did that intentionally.

"Mother, don't tease her too much." She heard him scolding his mother. His mother just smiled as she raised her glass to drink the water in front of her.

"My son, can you take the gift from my study? I want to give it to her as my present for your engagement. I wrapped it with a pink ribbon."

He nodded as he rose from his seat and left the room, she assumed he would take the said gift from the study room. She was nervous, what she should say to his mother? This was the first time she had met with his mother and her first impression of his father didn't help too.

Thankfully his mother start to speak to her.

"Were you the little girl from park few years ago? The one that my son cried for days for when we decided to leave the city?"

"Excuse me?" She said. His mother pulled out a picture from beneath the table and in that picture was a girl with blue colored hair as she stood with bruises on her face and a certain red-haired boy hiding behind her. She remembered this was their first time meeting with each other, she was protecting him from the bullies in the park. Even when she came home with bruises on her face, thankfully her parents never questioned her about it.

"I was surprised to see the same blue colored eyes the first time I saw you that morning. Well other things surprise me as well, but not as much as when I see you." His mother said as she could feel her face turn as red as her lover's hair. His mother would not stop to use that incident to tease her. "But the surprising things were when I heard from my husband that his prodigy son finally was able to go against him. For the first time, he didn't follow what my husband told him to."

"He has always been a strong person to begin with." She finally spoke. His mother shook her head.

"I believe he hasn't. He has been following what his father tells him. The more skills he mastered, the more skills his father would give to him to master. I am worried that one day, he will finally lose his mind from the immense pressure given to him." His mother said sadly. She didn't know whether she should say something or if should she just stay quiet. "I always feel as if he has two personalities whenever I see him, as if he will just break and lose his mind completely. I am scared of my own son."

"I—" She wanted to say something, but even she was afraid of him. She thought it was only her that feared her lover's fast changing mood swings.

"Then one day, he got into a fight with his father over something when he was in high school. The two of them ended up not talking to each other when he came back home. And as he got older, he stopped coming home completely and chose to go to his friend's house."

She just wanted to hide as she remembered the said friend he visited each holiday was her. Every holiday, he always come to her little apartment and just spend the rest of his holiday there. She gave him her spare key, because there were times when she was having sleepovers or club activities away from her apartment.

"He got his own apartment when he entered the university. He still gave me a call, asked me to dinner. But he never wanted to have anything to do with his father; never would he willingly sit on the same table as his father unless it was for business purposes." His mother said sadly. She could almost see the tears from his mother's eyes as she told her the story about him.

"I didn't know." She mumbled, loud enough for his mother to hear.

"I would like to apologize again." She heard his mother tell her. She looked up to see his mother look very guilty. "For my husband, I would like to apologize if he made you think you are not worthy to be my son's fiancé."

"I have always thought about that too." She said, clearly sad to be reminded of her place once again. She was just a nobody while he was a somebody. "I can understand if you don't want me to be with him."

"That is not what I meant." she heard his mother say quickly and she saw her rise to her feet and walk to where she was seated. His mother hugged and put her hand around her shoulder and put her face on top of her shoulder. "I want you to stay with my son. I want you to be with him forever."

"I don't—" She spoke but was surprised when his mother gave a small red colored box with pink ribbon wrapped around it. Wasn't her son supposed to retrieve it from her study?

"I don't ask you. I order you to." She heard his mother speak. This time, chills went down as she heard his mother speak with a cold voice. "As long as my son is staying with you, he will not break. If he loses me and in the future, also loses you, he will not be able to gain his sense again."

His mother picked up the box as she unwrapped the ribbon and revealed the contents of the box. Inside it, there was a very pretty ring with its red ruby colored gem. His mother picked it up and put the ring on her finger. She pushed aside the thought of how the ring fit perfectly on her finger.

"I give you two choices. If you want to be with my son, you will accept this ring and you will not leave him. No matter what happens in the future, you will stay with him until your last breath. And I shall guarantee that my husband will not be able to lay his hands on you." She swallowed a lump of her own saliva as she saw the ring on her finger. "And the second choice will be, you walk out of this room, I will make sure my son will never be able to find you until the day he takes his last breath. And you will not be able to find him either."

"I can't escape from him." She said sadly as she took a look at the ring on her finger. "But I can't take him for granted. I want to be able to stand next to him on equal ground. To be known with my own name rather than as his partner."

"Your answer then?" She heard his mother whisper to her ear. She could feel tears coming down from the corner of her eyes. She thought he was scary, his father was intimidating. But the worst in his family was his mother; she was the true devil in his house.

"I will stay with him." She said. At the same time she heard the door open and her lover walked with a sour expression on his face.

"Mother, what are you doing?"

"Having girl talk with your fiancé. I am excited to have such a pretty lady as my daughter."

"It seems I shouldn't have bothered to find the gift in your study room. The gift has found its way to the dining table." She heard him say when he spotted the box on top on the table.

"Forgive this old mother of yours. It completely slipped my mind that I had brought the box with me." His mother just smiled as she walked back to her seat, but not before giving one last tap on her shoulder. "Don't forget your promise." She heard his mother say to her.

"What promise?" He asked, clearly curious about the conversation between his lover and mother.

"To have girl's time, just the two of us and your credit card." His mother said happily as she took a look at her son. Her lover just gave his mother a questioning glance but didn't ask anymore as she saw the maids start to bring their food to the table.

But the said girl's time was just a plan in his mother mind, because just three days after their dinner, his mother was killed in his parent's house. There was a fire and his mother was trapped in the house. The rest of her time there, she was locked inside his house as he went back from the morgue to the police and to the office. And when she finally saw him, it was at his mother's funeral. His expression was cold and very empty, and she found herself to be more afraid of him. When the two of them were alone, she refused to meet his eyes. She was unable to stay by his side, as her promise to his mother because on the next day, she left him with a single note, telling him that the army had called her back. She could ask for more days off because she had told her superior about the incident regarding her fiancé, but she found herself to be haunted by his mother's words that fed her fear of him.

"I always feel as if he has two personalities whenever I see him, as if he will just break and lose his mind completely. I am scared of my own son."

At the time, she was too young to understand his mother's last conversation with her. She had let herself be engulfed with her fear of him; she had failed to embrace him when he needed her the most. And she had left him without saying goodbye. And sadly, by the time she realized this as she left the army to come back to his arms, the damage was already done.

-x-

AN:

so hello my lovely reader, here I am back with chapter 29. and as I mention in previous chapter, there will be one or two more story-from-past chapter(s) before I can continue with the real time-line.

I do have one huge problem: I did mention that my hard disk fail me and I lose everything in there, every guideline on how I can finish this story. this chapter is the last one that is still within the original plan and next chapter will be kinda "retracing-improvised" chapter from me re-reading this story and making another guideline. I have this strong feelings that the last antagonist will be different from what was in the original plan, some character might ended up appear and suddenly lost in the plotline.

so I am asking for your opinion:

1. we all know whose past that I wrote in this chapter. for next one, do you want a story on how with Araki entering her life? or do you guys prefer to continue from where I left of in this story? because it might change the amount of chapter needed and I don't know if you guys will like too many chapter spent in the past-story section

2. well, since I grow older, I realize that many of the thing that happen in here is definitely full of fiction stuff ^^

I apologize if you read this and go "this is impossible to happen in real life", just like I did when I read this years later. in the next chapter(as I continue the present timeline or the last part of the past-storyline) there will be some term/law/procedure that I know is legit in my country and my friend's country. it will definitely be different in your country or from what you have heard. I know I am bad at describing things(and I am thankful for my beta to help me with that), and this story will finally reach the core of its secret, do please don't be afraid to ask if some things in here make you go "oh wait, I thought author-san said A in chapter x, but why is it B in chapter xx?"

3. and the last but not least, I am thankful for my reader, who is still here and waiting for me to finish this story. I am grateful to have you guys here. and the reason why I make this super-long-AN, because I just want you guys to know what happened with me and what you might/might not see in order for me to finish this story. and I can promise you that the amount of chapter will not go beyond 40 ..

see you on the next chapter