Chapter 29

Forgiveness

Nyamo's POV

Over the course of the next two months, Mello and Jasmine moved out. Souchiro cried for over an hour. Even though they only moved down the street. Mariko hadn't spoken to me as much. She would say hello to be polite, but she never tried to strike up a conversation. L said nothing about it and I wouldn't push him to do so.

I was reading in bed one night. L was sitting at the computer and our son was fast asleep. Just as I closed my book, I heard a scream from next door. L and I jumped up.

"Mariko-san!"

I pulled on my jeans and a shirt. I ran downstairs. I ran out the door and found her door had been kicked in. I walked in silently, there was shouting and smashing upstairs. I looked around and grabbed a fire-poker. I stayed close to the wall and quietly went upstairs. A door flew open in front of me and I held my breath. I saw the intruder as it closed and I swung. I hit him in the ribs and he screamed. I kicked him in the face and he fell to the ground. I held the sharp end of the poker to his throat.

"Make one move and you're dead." I snarled.

He just stared at me.

"Mariko-san!?"

She slowly looked out from a room.

"Nyamo!"

That was Mello.

"Mariko-san, please get dressed and come with me."

She nodded and I called Mello up.

"You picked the wrong neighborhood." I hissed.

Mello picked him up and we checked him over for any weapons. Mariko came out and I looked at her.

"Are you hurt?"

She shook her head and I looked at the man.

"Breaking into homes and trying rob a woman, how honorable."

I hit him in the ribs and I heard one crack. He cried out and I nodded.

"Good. Mello you take him away. Mariko-san, please come with me."

She still seemed a bit shaken. I took her back to my house and sat her down in the living room. I made some tea and gave it to her. She wasn't harmed, but she seemed a bit more shaken than she should be.

"Mariko-san?"

"Nyamo!"

L came running down the stairs.

"Nyamo are you-"

He and Mariko stared at each other.

"Benjiro?!"

L didn't move and he didn't say anything.

"Um… Mariko-san this is my husband, Ryuuzaki." I said.

L turned and walked away.

"Nyamo? L?"

Jasmine came in and saw me.

"Mello told me what happened. Are you alright miss?"

I looked at the way L had gone.

"Jasmine would you sit with her for a moment?"

"Of course."

I smiled and then went after L. He was standing in the doorway of Soichiro's room.

"She's my mother." He whispered.

I sighed and stood next to him. Souchiro was snuggled under his blankets, his polar bear in his arms. I looked at L. His emotions were all over the place. Confusion, anger, pain, betrayal… it was breaking my heart.

"My father was killed during a break in. She was never the same after that. She just disappeared. I was only four. Souchiro's age. What a cruel twist of fate that she should move in right next door." He said quietly.

I really didn't know what to say. And there wasn't enough cake in the world for this. I felt him take my hand, but he didn't look at me.

"I know what you're feeling. But I think you should at least try and talk to her."

"Why?"

"Because she's your mother."

He let out a cold laugh. I'd never heard something like that before. Not from him.

"What mother abandons their four-year-old son?"

I sighed and he pulled me to his chest. He was shaking a bit. I wrapped my arms around him and closed my eyes.

"Maybe she left to protect you? I don't know. I don't know how to help you this time." I said.

He didn't say anything. He just held me. When he let go, I went back downstairs. Mariko was still there with Jasmine.

"He hates me, doesn't he?"

"No. He's angry but he does not hate you. Believe me when I say I would know. You're welcome to stay in the spare room for the night."

"I can't intrude. My son does not want me here and I will respect that. He has every right to be angry. I left him."

I knew L was probably listening.

"But why?" I asked.

She sighed and shook her head.

"Thank you for all your help. I promise to repay you."

"Mariko-san please! If you tell me I might be able to help."

She ignored me and started to leave.

"Stop!"

I slowly closed my eyes. L came down the stairs and stood beside me.

"I think I have a right to know why." He said.

I opened my eyes but his back was to me.

"I was four." He said.

Mariko had tears in her eyes.

"I didn't know what else to do. I was afraid that… that I…"

She stopped and L's anger was rising. I slowly put my hand on his arm, this usually calmed him a bit.

"L I'm so sorry."

"Sorry isn't good enough!"

"L! You'll wake up Souchiro."

"Sorry."

"I didn't know if I would be able to keep living. I-I didn't want you to find me…"

He was calming down a bit.

"Did you ever even look for me?" he asked.

"Of course I did! I looked for years. I've never stopped, and now I've found you. And I know you're angry with me, you have every right to be. I can only ask if you can find it in your heart to forgive me."

"Okasan? Otosan?"

I turned and saw Souchiro sitting on the stairs. I walked over and picked him up.

"There's a monster in my closet."

"A monster? Should I get the monster spray?"

He nodded and I smiled.

"Okay. Say goodnight."

He looked at L and Mariko and waved. L came over and stroked his hair.

"Goodnight Souchiro. Okasan will take care of that monster."

"It wants apples."

My eyes went wide and L and I looked at each other.

"That's impossible." I said.

"You go." He said.

I nodded and handed our son to him.

"Perhaps we should talk another time." Mariko said.

L nodded and I gave nodded goodnight. She left and I took a deep breath.