Chapter 28: We don't know what we've got until we've lost it

Edward's POV

After cleaning myself and trying to void my face of all the emotions that were running through me, I made my way back to the camp site. Jacob had disappeared through the forest, and hadn't come back yet, I noticed as I strolled back to the entrance of the tent. Gazing at Seth's mind, I didn't see Jacob's mind. He was in his human form. Seth looked up at me, " What's going on? Where's Jake? Did you see him? He came after you. Shortly after you left," he questioned me, not pausing to listen to my answer.

"I saw him. He took off a little while ago. He should be back soon. I'm going to keep an eye out for him. Don't worry," I replied softly before entering the tent again.

Bella was curled in fetal position and sound asleep. She shivered once in a while.

Taking my seat against the wall of the tent again, I sighed and leaned against it. What in the world had just happened out there?

Jacob Black had just gotten me off.

I licked his hand in the most sensuous way I knew!

I tried to turn him on. And succeeded.

If it could, my heart would be thundering through my ribcage. I was suddenly anxious. I couldn't wait to see him-I needed to see him. I couldn't explain why. But, I knew if I did, things would make sense. I swallowed unnecessarily.

Across the tent, Bella shuddered and curled further down into the sleeping bag.

But somehow, all I could think of was Jacob. I closed my eyes and all I saw was Jacob. His face. His smile. His eyes. His lips.

'" Family," I whispered against his skin and pressed a feathery kiss to his tattoo'

The random memory from our time in the cave popped in my head. Jacob was family. He was part of my family.

As his face popped into my mind again, I caught his smell as he trudge through the snow and towards the tent. The fluttering in my stomach had returned.

My nails dug into my skin as I sat up straight and waited for Jacob to enter the tent. The fluttering inside my stomach increased by tenfold as I heard the zip move down and Jacob's head popped inside, followed by the rest of his body.

Once inside, he turned and looked at me. His face was carved in stone, carefully masked and devoid of any emotions. But, as his eyes met mine, a telltale blush spread across his cheeks.

I felt the corners of my mouth start to pull up in a smile. Jacob turned away from me and slid back into the sleeping bag. Bella, instinctively flipped her body and wrapped herself around Jacob, like a spider monkey.

Frustration flickered though my body and it took a lot of self control not to reach out and fling Bella across the tent, away from my wolf. My Jacob. Mine.

" Try not reading my mind this time around," said Jacob, his voice hard as he laid on his back, " It's one gift per wedding."

" Try not thinking so loud,"I replied back, amusement lacing my voice.

He growled, " Keep out of my head, leech. It's bad enough I have to tolerate you in real life."

" I don't think you mind having me around. You wouldn't be having wet dreams about me if you did."

" You're the one who couldn't bear it and had to run away to jerk off," he pointed out lazily.

" You're the one who was dreaming about pounding me."

" You wanted it."

" So I did," I replied, locking my eyes with him. His face turned bright red as he took in my words and he averted his eyes.

I smirked at him in the dark but he refused to meet my eyes. Tossing and turning as best as he could with Bella wrapped around him, he sighed a few times. I had no idea what he was thinking about, but his uneven breathing told me he was still awake.

Without consciously realizing it, I started humming. A deep, rich melody that I was making on the spot, but yet sounded familiar. I felt Jacob's eyes on me as I hummed, but my mind drifted away as I tried to place this tune I was humming. Esme's smiling face ran through my mind; though this was unsurprising considering the fact that she was one of my fervent admirers; however it jolted a memory of where I had heard this song. I had composed right after I found out about Jacob's imprinting.

This...was Jacob's song.

As I listened carefully to my own voice, I noticed the richness of the melody, the deep timbre of my voice reminded me of his eyes; deep, soulful and happy eyes, the upbeat but calming tune reminded me of his joyful personality, and how he had a way of calming me down. How everything seemed right when I was with him. How alive he made me feel.

My eyes slid open and automatically searched for Jacob's sleeping form. I watched his peaceful face-so young and vulnerable.


Bella's POV

When I woke up the next morning, it was so bright that it seemed like I had dreamt the storm last night. I was sweating and when I looked around, I found myself pinned under a heavy arm.

Jacob.

Eyes flickering around the tent, I found Edward sitting perfectly still. He gave me a smile when our eyes met.

" Morning," he greeted me.

" Help?" I whined softly so as not to wake Jacob up. He was still fast asleep. His hot breath tickled my ear.

Edward got up and held Jacob's hand and lifted it up so I could slide out. Finally, free of the restraint I was in, I glanced up at Edward, who was still holding Jacob's hand.

Both of my eyebrows shot to my forehead when I noticed Jacob's fingers laced through Edward's. Long tanned fingers wound in between long pale ones. Though the contrast was beautiful, it felt like someone had stabbed me. My breath was caught in my throat. Risking a glance at Edward, I found him staring at Jacob's fingers, in no apparent rush to get the 'mutt's' fingers away from him.

Sensing my stare, Edward looked over at me, and instantly dropped Jacob's hand like hot potatoes. A grunt from Jacob's lips caused Edward's lips to twitch before he could contain himself and broke into a full smile.

I was floored.

What the hell was going on? Edward was smiling? Because of Jacob?

I stared at my boyfriend, eyes wide and mouth sagging. He took a look at my face and burst out laughing-a whole hearty laugh. My heart rate spiked as I watched this man infront of me, like he was a stranger. Who was this man? Edward Cullen never laughed. It sounded wonderful, like church bells chiming-deep and melodious.

His laughter, however, was short lived. His eyes slipped away from my face and he rushed outside. Following him, I stood behind Edward as he talked to or through the sandy coloured wolf, who I can only assume was Seth. He was smaller than the rest of the pack, except for maybe the two newest addition.

"What's the matter?" I called out.

"Nothing. There's just been an...issue."

I frowned but didn't say anything.

" Bella, I'm going to go coordinate with everyone at home. Could you please wake Jake?"

" How much time?" I asked, wrapping my hands around my body, trying to barricade myself from the chilling wind.

" 1 hour," replied Edward, distractedly as he motioned the wolf to follow him.

Sighing, I stepped back into the tent and shook Jacob awake. After a few grunts and groans from the shifter, he finally woke up.

"Hey Bells," he mumbled sleepily; clearly forgetting he was mad at him.

" One hour," I said. I didn't what else to say. Was I supposed to tell him to get up and go fight with an army of vampires? For me? He could barely tolerate me as it is.

Jacob's eyes widened and he jumped out of the sleeping bag, " Where's...uhm..where's everyone?"he said awkwardly.

" Edward and Seth are coordinating with everyone else at home?"

Jacob nodded.

" Jake, I want to apologize for the way I treated you last night. It was unfair. I know you didn't choose to imprint on Edward. But, I can't lose him."

" You won't," replied Jacob stiffly.

" We love each other," I reiterated, though I wasn't sure who I was trying to convince anymore. Him or me?

"Well, then you have no reason to fear," he whispered audibly, " he loves you. Not me. I want him to be happy and if he's happy with you, then I won't get in the way."

"Get in the way?" I asked, puzzled.

" I won't come between you, Bella," he said softly but firmly.

"Thank you," I whispered.

He nodded before heading out. I followed him.

Edward and Seth came out of the forest at the same and we all stopped walking and looked at each other. Except for Seth, who sauntered towards his brother and rubbed himself on Jacob's leg, like a real dog, causing Jacob to burst out in laughter.

His rich, booming laugh echoed in the forest as he crouched down infront of his brother and scratched the latter behind his ears. Seth barked joyously and licked Jacob's face.

"Ew, gross, dude," cried Jacob as he wiped his face with the back of his hand while Seth barked happily again.

"How's everything?" asked Jacob as he settled with a more serious expression.

Seth nodded his humongous head and Jacob nodded once, "Good. I'm gonna go now. You keep an eye on things here for me?"

Seth nodded-his usually mirthful eyes were wide and serious.

"Okay," said the shifter once more before he stood up and ruffled Seth's fur.

" Bye, Bella," he said as he looked at me, and finally he glanced over at Edward and nodded.

Turning his back on us, he started walking away into the forest to change and go join his brothers.

"Jake," cried Edward, causing the shifter to stop dead in his tracks and turn his head over his shoulder to look at his imprint, " Be careful, will you?"

Jacob spun around and met Edward's eyes before nodding and walked into the forest. My heart felt heavier as I watched his retreating back. Something felt wrong and I couldn't shake the feeling off.


Edward's POV

He nodded at me before turning his back on us and walking into the forest. His mind was blank, but I had caught the worry in his voice as he told Seth to take care of things. Truth be told, I was worried about him too. The fluttering in my stomach returned with a vengeance-though his time, it wasn't in a good way.

"Jake," I suppressed a shiver as his nickname spilled out, unconsciously on my lips. With my eyes on his bare back, I watched as he threw a glance, almost casually over his shoulders at me.

" Be careful, will you?" My words cause him to swivel on his still bare heels, and as brown orbs meet mine, the fluttering increased by tenfold. Although he was doing his best to block me from his thoughts, right here and now, he couldn't hide. No block could shield me from whatever emotions was coursing through him. Anger, hurt, with undertones of love and what scared me the most-recklessness. I felt my breath hitch in my throat.

He nodded, almost mechanically, as his eyes shone at me. This time with warmth. He spun around, determinedly this time and stalked into the forest.

My heart sank as I watched him disappear into a big russet wolf. Unconsciously, I pressed my hand to my stomach, in hopes of diffusing the fluttering.

"What's the matter?" asked Bella as she watched me from the entrance of the tent.

I shook my head, but didn't stop myself from replying, " I have this fluttering...in my stomach," a little confused and more to myself than anyone else.

" Fluttering?"

"Yes," I said incredulously.

" Like butterflies?"

Butterflies?

I had heard of this little...idiom...before. Girls used it all the time. I scrunched up my face in confusion. They used it to describe a crush though. Or love. But, that couldn't be... Me? No...

And with Jacob?

I gulped.

This didn't even happen with Bella-she's my girlfriend. I've done pretty unusual things for her, like killing James. Not killing her, despite her smell. I've befriended humans...Tolerated dogs.

" You did that for Jacob too," came the little nagging voice in my head, that for once didn't belong to anyone, but me.

I did tolerate dogs for him. Heck, he was a dog. I've done way more with him, than with Bella. I sighed.

Veering my thoughts to Seth's, I read the jumble of thoughts that were coming from the pack, as a whole and as individuals. Jacob's thoughts stood out from the rest of them. As the rest of him usually did to me.

The fluttering returned and I felt my stomach sink as I read the recklessness behind his every thought, and move. There was no mental block anymore. I guess he didn't think I could read his thoughts through Seth. But, the pack's mind was so intertwined that I could read them all, as a whole and as individuals, if I wanted to and focused on it.

Keeping an ear on Jacob's thoughts, I followed Bella into the tent. She was lying on her stomach, face pressed into the sleeping bag, that still smelled like Jacob. I took a deep breath, bringing him as close to me as possible, before crouching down to Bella. I stroked her hair, in a soothing manner. I wasn't sure why I was doing it. But, it seemed like the accepted convention.

Her breath caught in her throat and she made a hollow choking sound before running through her words, " I can't stand this, Edward."

" What, Bella?" I asked, gently.

" This. People I know and love, dying for me. I'm not even helping. Instead, I'm here-hiding. Like a coward."

" You wouldn't have been able to help. If anything, you would have gotten yourself killed. No one wants that."

She gave a sarcastic laugh before mumbling lowly, " Except Jacob, maybe."

Probably not meant for my ears, but I picked up anyway.

" No. Not even Jacob. He would never," I replied with a sigh.

Brown eyes shot up to meet mine, but I couldn't focus anymore. My eyes zoomed to the area where Seth was sitting; although it didn't matter where I was looking I could still pick his thoughts up, but I trained my eyes towards the wolf and watched the parade of newborns stalking into the small open space where the wolves were waiting-Sam patient, the others giddy with the thought of the impending fight, Jacob was just high...happy.

A sneer graced his wolfish face as he stood a little straighter to 'welcome' the army of newborns. My hands balled into a fist at my sides as I waited.

Like Alice had foreseen, the newborns had caught the smell of the wolves and those of our coven, and had indeed split up.

"It's starting," I said softly.


Jacob's POV

I never thought I'd say this but, I was fucking happy to see these leeches. I didn't know how or when I came with this...out. But, here it was. A way out. My second one really. Had Edward not ruined the first one for me in Alaska.

Though, I have to admit that one was only a half felt attempt. I didn't want it as bad then as I want it now.

Finding out about the wedding...was a kick to my face. A stake in my heart. If I was hurting before, there was no words to describe this. This soul sucking numbness, with underlying tones of anger that had washed over me as I stood in the doorway of the Cullen's house and hearing Bella stumble through the five words that still haunted me, " Yes...I'll marry you."

There was no better way to go than this. I would stick to my brothers till the end and then...a slip.

A fallen hero.

There was no better way for a Black to die. Glorious.

Pride filled me as I thought that I was going to die for the betterment of my community. For my brothers. My sisters. The Cullens. My father. Edward.

I would leave the world a slightly better place than it was.

The army of newborns paused at the other end of the cleared area as we stepped out of the shadows and greeted them with snarls. I stood a little taller, bared my teeth and gave it my best.

Taking their pause as a sign of weakness, we advanced towards our prey. Shoulder to shoulder, we were a sight to behold. Or so I was told. Quil rolled his eyes mentally at me. Paul scoffed while Sam snarled at me in irritation and disappointment, surely having caught my thoughts, even though I was doing my best to keep them hidden. Nothing he can do about it now though. It's too late. Too fucking late!

Giving them all a wolfish grin, I focused at the task at hand. The newborns had recovered and were advancing towards us.

My brothers glanced at each other, and I heard the concern and the worry. They wondered if I was serious.

"Only time will tell," I replied cheekily through our mental connection, before turning to the newborns. In the clearing, less than a mile away, I-we-could hear the fight start. Somewhere to my left, I heard Emmett's maniacal laugh. Crazy bastard was enjoying himself, I thought with a smile.

Leah snarled and jumped. Damn...she was fast. Her teeth latched on to an arm and with a swing of her head, she snapped it off and flung it across the forest. The arm bounced off a tree and we heard it fall down the ground. Her actions enraged the rest of them.

Paul and Jared got another one. The leeches were more focused on defending themselves now-they had no idea how to deal with a bunch of crazy wolves. They were backing away, but we weren't going to let this happen.

They started forming a circle, with their backs towards each other and their arms outstretched towards us. Jasper's words came to me: " Don't let them get their hands around you. They will crush you like a soda can." So, I lunged towards the center of their circle at the same time as Leah did.

My throat burnt as I snapped one of their heads. Sam and the rest of the pack were snapping and flinging right, left and centre. But, as I was getting ready to snap at another, Leah whimpers caught my ear. Somehow, in the midst of it all, she had managed to end up, in the middle of two newborns. My jaw dropped open, allowing the newborn whose arm was in my mouth to go free and retaliate. With his good hand, he scratched the hell out of my left side. But, the burning was nothing compared to the fear of losing my packmate. I couldn't focus on the fire coursing through my veins as I took in Leah's situation.

It was as if everything was in slow motion. All I could see was Leah's profile. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Through our mental link, I felt Jared's heartbreak, his desperation as he tried to cross the forest to get to his imprint, and above all I felt his fear.

The same fear that had crossed my mind, my heart and my soul when a few days ago, I had imagined Edward fighting. That fear washed over me again as my eyes stayed on Leah. Her whimpers clawed at my chest as I realized what she was about to lose:her life, Jared's life, Jared's love and she was about to lose her chance at a lifetime with the person she loved the most-that same person who loved her unconditionally. Marriage, motherhood, growing old with the man she loved.

In a split of a second, my mind was made up. I leapt a short distance across the forest, rammed my head into Leah's side and the sheer force was enough to send her flying aside, away from the newborns. Startled, they staggered for a second and then, they closed their arms...Around me, almost like a reflex.

One around my chest and the other around my lower abdomen. I heard the multiple cracks, and smelled rust before darkness enveloped me and my body sagged to the floor.


Edward's POV

I watched the dark smoke rise a few feet across from me and I sighed. It was over. Finally, over. Victoria and her sidekick, Riley, a local blond were finally dead.

Everyone was fine. Here and there. We had made it. We all made it, I thought as I watched the pack effortlessly take down the newborns. They had been taken by surprise. With no tactic to deal with wolves, they were backing away and into the clearing where the Cullens were.

I turned to Seth with a grin on my face. He was really proud of himself and couldn't wait till he could gloat with his brothers. He was happy that they would finally stop treating him like the child, they thought he was.

"What was the issue, you mentioned earlier?" questioned Bella as she played with the bandaid on her hand. Following a legend she heard at one of the Quileute campfires, she cut herself to drive the Cold Ones crazy. She had succeeded. Both Victoria and Riley had gone bonkers and turned to her instead of focusing on us, thus making our jobs much, much easier.

" Nothing serious. We have to go though."

" What was it?" demanded Bella again.

Instead of answering her, my head snapped to Seth's face as something-someone-caught my attention.

Jacob.

And Leah.

She was stuck in between two vampires, and though she hadn't been attacked yet, it was only a matter of seconds.I watched as emotions flickered over the russet wolf's face. And, in that moment, without having to read his mind, I knew what he was about to do. With agony, I watched as he ran towards his packmate and knocked her sideways, and slid into her place.

"No," I cried out in my head, as I stood there, frozen-literally and figuratively.

However, hope rose in me again, as I watched the startled vampires stumbled backwards for a split second, giving Jacob the chance to dart out. But, he didn't. I watched as a smirk ghosted over his face, so fast that he probably didn't know he had smirked. My heart sank.

A pair of arms wrapped themselves around his torso while another crushed his lower abdomen, effectively cutting his air supply.

Somewhere, next to me, Seth's body spasmed and a painful howl ripped from his lungs. My mind and my heart blistered with agony, I tried to move forward-tried to get to him, but I couldn't. I staggered a few steps before dropping to my knees, with a 'thud,' like a bag of rocks. The pain that took over my body, and shook me to the core, was unbearable. I fisted my hair with my hands and pulled at the ends as the images continued to assault my brain.

"Edward!" screamed Bella, somewhere in my vicinity, " Edward!"

The two leeches were leaning over my Jacob's wolf form and licking the blood that was oozing from him and that was matted to his fur.

" Help," I gasped out as pain rocked my body, " help him. Somebody...please...help him..." They would suck him dry. They would kill him. They would kill Jacob. My Jacob. I couldn't, for the love of God, make my limbs work. Ironically, as I stood there-as if I was in a coma, this was the moment when everything clicked into place for me. The moment when I watched with impotence, the death of my...mate.

Seth howled in anguish.

A midnight and a dark silver wolf tore the two leeches off Jacob's body, and I angled my head towards Seth, and gasped again, " Sam-help him-Help him. Please help him. Please." I begged as I recognized the midnight wolf as the alpha of the pack. Through Seth's mind, the midnight wolf looked right at me, sympathy ringing his body as he nodded his massive head.

I believed him. I trusted Sam. He was a man of his word. I could trust him to make this right with Jacob.

" Take him home. Turn him back. Take him to Billy's," I ordered as determination rose through me, " take the pack. You need to get back on the Rez. Do not ask me any questions. Just do it. I'll go get Carlisle. I'll be there as soon as I can."

Still on my knees, I walked towards Seth, who looked like he was ready to bolt through the forest to his fallen brother.

" Go home, Seth," I said. He tried to argue, wanting to go the part of the forest where the pack would be working with Jacob's body, trying to get to phase back to his human form, before we-Carlisle can look at him.

" Home. Go, straight home. Colin and Brady need you to be there. Trust me," I whispered rapidly and fervently.

As he took off into the forest, I stood up and turned to Bella.

" Who? Who got hurt?" she whispered.

" We have to go," I said, ignoring her question, my voice hard and cold. I pulled her close, picked her up and ran towards the clearing where the rest of the Cullens were.


"Edward, what happened? Before. When you...you were hurting so much and Seth howled. Who got hurt? Tell me! Edward!" cried Bella, her voice almost desperate, as we reached the clearing. Almost simultaneously, Jasper gasped and held on to his chest with both hands. The anguish in his eyes matched my feelings to the T. Alice darted to her mate and followed his eyes to where I was standing, and gulped.

Naturally, everyone had heard and every vampire, with the exception of Jazz and Alice, rushed to our sides, concerned.

" Someone got hurt?" cried Esme, worried.

I nodded swiftly, " Alice, how much time till they get here?"

"Five more minutes."

" Edward," said Carlisle, " who got hurt?"

" Jacob," I whispered, as my head came up and met Rosalie's eyes. Hurt flickered through her eyes, but I also saw sympathy for me, as understanding finally dawned upon her. Looking across the clearing, Jasper straightened up with the help of Alice and met my eyes. "Sorry, Jazz," I whispered, knowing he could hear me very well from where he was. He nodded and waves of calm washed over me, sporadically. He was having a hard time pushing my feelings out of the way to replace them with his own and projecting these feelings over to me.

Next to me, Bella gasped and covered her mouth with her hand.

"Oh god," breathed Esme, " is he okay?"

I gulped. My eyes burnt and I cursed myself for not even being able to cry for him. I lifted a shoulder in half a shrug, unable to answer. My throat was closing off.

Esme's hands ran up and down my arm, as she murmured comforting words in my ear, but I couldn't hear her. My mind was in another part of the forest. Wondering how he was doing. Wondering if he was going to make it through. Wondering if we'll make it through.


Author's Note:

Hey everyone,

There we go.. Edward's finally caught up! Review and let me know how you like it.

Also, I wrote a new story called Rhythm of Life, and it's based on the song Rhythm of Love by the Plain White Ts. It's a Jakeward story as well. Please check it out and let me know how I did.

Please review. Loads and loads. I need motivation to continue this story-remember there's only a couple more chapters left now.

Until next time,

Lisa


Disclaimer:

This chapter is based on the book by Stephanie Meyer, Eclipse. This story is meant for pleasure and not infrigement. But, I do own the plot.