Scarred

(Hilmes x Reader)

(A/n: Hey guys, ok so again this isn't one of the most popular animes but i love it, the animation was very nice and the dub isn't half bad. Its called Arslan Senki so if you have run out of animes to watch and haven't watched this then i defiantly recommend it... i am using a little of the plot in the anime so minor spoiler alert is now in place. He is also slightly out of character)

Hilmes, the man that had shown up on your door step years ago with a burned face and a dead father, killed because his uncle wanted the throne for himself. You knew that he was not the first king to gain his throne this way and would not be the last, but as you sat there and tended to the wounds of the poor boy and watched him struggle with the nightmares he now suffered you had to curse the man that gave the order to burn is manor. As his wounds healed you became the closest thing he had to family, teaching him everything he knew about swordplay and even tried to teach him the art of the bow, he proved to be a lot less patient, so he took to perfecting his swordplay. The man you had shed the blood of so many enemies with and healed the wounds of his body whenever a battle went bad. The man that had protected you from blades and arrows alike to keep you safe. Now, many many years later when he decided he wanted to leave and get the revenge he had been craving for all these years you followed, acting as his advisor, teacher and almost as a lover. You crafted him the silver mask he now wears every hour of the day and was only removed at night when you sat on the side of his bed and pulled it off his sleeping face.

As he had wished he now has the entire kingdom of Pars under his thumb, but ever since then he had found he doesn't have anything to do, there was nothing left to his life now that he had accomplished the one goal he had set himself all those years ago. It was like he was missing the part of himself that made him whole. One day when he was sitting on his desk elbows resting on his knees and face resting in his cupped hands, you standing as the ever present shadow at his side, a soldier entered his chambers and told you both that Arslan's corpse had not yet been found and there were reports that he was traveling with Daryun, Narsus and a bunch of other misfits in an attempt to gather allies to assault the castle. Hilmes's whole body became tense at the news and he growled at the soldiers a bunch of orders that you didn't bother listening to because you knew he would come up with a different plan anyway, the man left shaking with fear of the voice he had just heard.

You walked forward when you heard the click of the door, turning to face Hilmes with only a few inches between your faces.

"What do we do now?" You reached your hands up to the mask that sat perfectly on his face. He just turned his head to the side, you could tell by the look in hs eyes that he was thinking very hard, he was very conflicted. "Why hesitate, did you not want to boy dead?" You rested your hands on his that now rested in his lap.

"I did... but now i don't even think that it would be worth it... i have had my revenge" He pulled his hands out of yours and jumped off the table circling around you "The boy should not be faulted for the sins of his father. He is welcome to come back to this castle if he wishes" You were very confused never once had you heard Hilmes sound so conflicted, it was almost like he was trying to lie to himself as well as you.

"If that is what you wish my lord, should i tell the men to ready the horses?" You began to walk for the door expecting him to answer you with words, but instead you felt this pressure on your arm. You turned to see the eyes of the man who was completely different from the revenge driven warrior that you had followed all these year, this was almost the innocent little boy that used to hand you flowers every time you saw him, only now he was 6'1" with broad shoulders and some of the most beautiful dark brown locks. You snapped yourself from your thoughts and mentally slapped yourself Stop thinking about him like that... it's not lik ehe is the only male you have ever gotten close to and come to care about in a way that is similar to a romantic lover, and its not like you love him because he has saved your life more times then you can count and taken care of you even though he could have left you for dead instead. It's not like you have actual romantic feelings for him...

yeah you keep telling yourself that.

You let out an audible sigh and walk to the desk that was now vacant laying back on it thinking about all the things you had done together as well as the things you hadn't. You were pulled from your thoughts when you were suddenly pulled back into a sitting position by strong hands which then embraced you, holding you close. The desk made you taller so you were now at his eye level, you looked into his eyes, the gray one that has ceased working and now held no emotion and the shining blue eye that held all these strange emotions that you had never seen in him before. Lost in his eyes for a second you reached your hands out to cup his face, your hand was not met with the warmness of his skin but the cooler touch of the metal that coated it. Sorrow entered your gaze for a second before you reached to the side slightly to remove the mask. Before your fingers had even curled over the edge his hands had a rather firm grip on your wrists, the part of his face you could see had contorted in pain, you knew full well that even though you had seen him so many times without it he thought you would see him as an ugly beast and nothing more. You let go of the mask and let him guide your hands anywhere he wished.

His eyes narrowed dangerously and you couldn't help the shiver of fear that rode up and down your spine at that look. Without saying a word he kept your wrists collected in one hand the other moved to your face caressing your cheek before he brought his chapped lips to yours in a passionate kiss. Wait this is actually happening!? You tried to pull your hands free but he was far stronger then you and held them fast.

When he broke away he pulled you off the desk and started to lead you out of the room.

"W-where are we going?" You had to jog to keep up with his large strides. He didn't answer you, instead he just kept walking until you reached the door to his room. He basically threw you through the door and slammed you back into it when he closed it behind him. Holding your hands above your head and attacking your lips with his. you managed to break away long enough to pose a question "Why so sudden?" He pulled away but kept you in position

"You may not have known, but i have felt this way about you for so long... you have stood next to me no matter what decision i made even if you didn't believe it was the way to go. I also know that every night you sneak past my guards and sit on my bed" He released your hands and beckoned you over to the bed "With these very hands" He grasped them and gave them a kiss "You gently remove my mask, sitting it on my bedside table and run your fingers through my hair with the softest of touches" He then reached up and stroked your cheek "I pretended to be asleep because i felt that if you knew i was awake you wouldn't kiss me on the cheek just before you left..." You sat in silence for the next few minutes. Lost in thought you were unaware of his loving gaze.

So he was awake that entire time? If he didn't pull away then he must have found it comforting? If he wished you to stop he would have just told you...

"I am not going to attack the kid because i know you will think it wrong... so i will leave this palace at some point tomorrow and allow Arslan to retake his kingdom... but you have to promise you are going to stay with me" He said this in a tone full of hope and a hint of despair. To lay his mind at rest you muttered the words you always did when he was nervous or anxious

"I will always follow you, no matter what choice you make, who you follow or where you lead me, i will follow you" You reached your hands up and cupped his face. With your confidence suddenly boosted you leaned in and gave his a chaste kiss.

His arms wrapped around your waist pulling you closer to his body, you hands warping themselves around his neck, your nose was met with the cool feel of the silver mask you had crafted for him yourself. You leaned back slightly and wrapped your fingers around the edges, looking into his eyes to make sure he was ok with it before completely removing the mask from his skin. You looked upon the discolored skin on his face and saw nothing but beauty, you could see beyond the skin, the soul that was hiding behind all those protective walls.

And he was beautiful.

You decided to prove this with actions rather then words. Leaping straight back into his arms you kissed him passionately. You sudden weight on his body caused him to fall backwards onto the bed, leaving you straddling him while still clinging to him for dear life.

Let's just day you spent the night in his quarters that night and didn't set out until late in the afternoon the next day.

(I am sorry if i could write smut i promise every fanfic would have smutty af but i can't soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo its up to your imaginations, but im sure you can be very imaginative ;) )

(Also i apologise because this is a much shorter fanfiction then the others i have been writing lately but i found it hard to write for him... but there is a fanfiction for him)