Chapter Twenty Nine
"Hey...are you done?"
The attention of both men was drawn to the doorway, and Sam felt his concern and protective tendencies leap into overdrive as he took in the appearance of a clearly agitated, wide-eyed McNally fidgeting with the edge of her sleeve and chewing down on her bottom lip – unable to meet his gaze. Jerry spoke before any words found their way to his lips though, so instead he listened to his friends words without allowing himself to look away – attempting to read every flicker of emotion he saw grace her features.
"McNally, you ok?" Jerry rose to his feet and took a few steps towards her, but faltered when she took a step back, eyes widening and nodded her head furiously at him before her eyes finally met Sam's.
"Yep...good. Fine...I'm fine...I just..."
"Ok...ok, yeah we're done." Jerry glanced over his shoulder at Sam, already knowing that his focus had now completely shifted to the other person in the room. "Sam...I meant what I said, ok? You have to...Sam?"
Sam couldn't tear his eyes away from Andy, felt his stomach churn when he picked up on the fact that she was actually shaking, but was aware enough of his friend to issue a response. "What exactly am I going to do Jer? I would have to get out of here first..."
"Ok...good, well focus on that for now and I..." he glanced back at Andy "I'm going to leave you two to it...Andy?" He took a few steps forward, and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder – grimacing slightly when she flinched under his touch, but the gesture worked – it pulled her wide-eye locked gaze away from Sam and over to him for a second. "Frank asked me to remind you about your session with Dr. Lemi tomorrow...you have to start going at some point. It's the only way you're going to get cleared for duty – and we need you back."
Andy nodded briefly at him in acknowledgement before seeking out Sam again, and making a move to step around him – but Jerry stepped in front of her – bending his knees and seeking her eyes again. "10 am Andy...your booked in for 10am." He knew from what he had seen in the past few weeks that the only way he had any hope of Andy turning up tomorrow was if Sam knew about it too, and Andy appeared to pull herself back together slightly at his words – her face moulding into a disapproving stare that told him in no uncertain terms that she was fully aware of his motives. Jerry made no apologies, he had promised Traci he would make sure she went this time – and if he was going to have to rope Sam into it then that was what he was going to do. He let go of her shoulder, and threw a half smile over his shoulder to Sam – not completely sure if he even registered it, and issued his goodbyes. "I'll be back tomorrow – let you know how it goes."
Sam nodded almost imperceptibly and momentarily glanced in Jerry's direction. "Yep..." and threw a "...thanks buddy," after Jerry's departing form, which was acknowledged by a wave of Jerry's hand as he walked out the door.
"That was a long statement..." Andy attempted a soft smile that didn't quite attach itself convincingly to any of her features, and desperately fought the urge to throw herself at him...keeping her feet firmly planted on the spot where she currently stood in the middle of his room.
Sam eyed her warily, his eyes sweeping her entire tense body from her ankles to eyebrows and back down to her fidgeting fingers – she had attempted to reign herself in, was battling with herself – that much was obvious, but she was also very visibly shaken and frayed around the edges and he wasn't sure which one of the million phrases and questions running through his head would be the best words to try and start off with. He swallowed harshly a few times, before letting out a heavy sigh and decided to ease into this conversation lightly. "We weren't just talking statements..."
"No?"
"Nope..." He smiled gently at her, "...proposals, babies, Traci, Ollie." He reached out a hand to her, indicating that he wanted her to come closer and allowed his dimples to make an appearance when she smiled back. Andy didn't need to be asked twice, making short work of the distance between them and taking a seat on the edge of his bed wrapping her arms tightly around his neck, and hugging him with everything she had left. He hissed slightly and involuntarily as the unexpected fierceness of her grip, but wrapped his arms around her automatically – holding her to him, and refusing to let her pull away – which was her automatic reaction as soon as she registered that she had hurt him. He felt her trail a line of kisses down his neck to his shoulder, along his collarbone gently nibbling intermittently and he sensed her smile against him as she heard his breathing hitch. She continued her treasure trail back up his throat and felt his hand tangle in her hair; he angled his head up slightly to give her better access, and tightened the fingers he had wrapped around her arm – holding onto her. "Andy..."
He had intended the way he mumbled her name to come out as a warning, but even to his own ears – knowing the intention behind them, it sounded more like a moan. He allowed his eyes to close and focus on the intoxicating spell she was weaving on him. Andy allowed one of her hands to slip away from the back of his neck – resting against his shoulder, and the other moved upwards – tangling itself through his hair and massaging gently at the bottom of his skull as she moved her nibbling to his jaw – carving a path to his lips, which she had always intended to be her finish line. She kissed him gently at first, only meaning for it to be brief but as soon as her lips met his she couldn't make herself pull away – needing the feel of his mouth on hers as much as her own oxygen supply. She nibbled on his bottom lip, requesting access and Sam willingly complied – kissing her back deeply, and with an intensity that took her a little by surprise. Andy melted into him, the warm fuzzy foggy-brained sensation that always came from Sam's kisses settling like a welcome relief from her antsy five-hundred mile an hour whirring thoughts and she tightened her grip on his hair, attempting to pull him closer and loose herself in the feelings that were starting to uncoil inside her. The weight of Andy against him coupled with the movement of her trying to pull him closer pulled another involuntary hiss of pain from his mouth – swallowed by one of Andy's hungry kisses, but she heard it all the same, along with the feeling of him tense and flinch under her and she instantly let go of him – pulling away sharply as if he had burned her, her eyes flying wide open and met his gaze with her concern blatantly obvious – the spell well and truly broken.
"Shit...Sam...I...I'm sorry."
"It's ok." He attempted a smile, but was pretty sure it looked more like a grimace because it did nothing to dislodge the look of horror currently etched on her face. He reached out and tucked some of her unruly hair behind her ear, before gently wrapping his fingers around the back of her neck and pulling her gently towards him until she was close enough for him to nudge her nose gently, and then missing her kisses he pulled her closer still – planting a soft reassuring kiss on her lips before finally relinquishing his grip, reaching down for one of her hands that were now firmly planted in the blankets on the edge of his bed – away from him. He took hold of her hand, and smiled at her again – intertwining their fingers, and this time it worked – earning a shy smile from her in return. "Don't be sorry..."
Andy glanced down at his hand gripping hers, and felt her cheeks burn – she knew she was blushing and she tried to keep the rising colour in her face at bay by biting down on her bottom lip hard, but it did nothing to help her predicament. She said the words out loud anyway; her blush had been brought on by her thinking them so she might as well just put them out there anyway. "I...It's just...I miss you." She chanced a shy glance back up at him, admittedly it wasn't the most articulate words she had ever spoken but she knew what she meant. With one look at Sam's face scrunched in confusion however, it would appear that he didn't.
"I'm right here..."
Andy blushed an even brighter shade of pink, and rolled her eyes at him. "Not what I meant genius...I mean I miss..." Her words died on her and she scowled at him as she picked up on a slight hint of him trying to dampen down a smirkish smile, narrowing her eyes in accusation – of course he knew what she meant. "Jerk!"
Sam stopped battling with himself, and unleashed a full smirk at the feigned glare of annoyance she was aiming at him prompting Andy to opt for a change of subject. "So proposals and babies huh?...something you want to tell me?" She peered up at him with a sweet smile and manically fluttering eyelashes, and he shook his head at her antics allowing a small laugh to escape before schooling his expression into one of deadly seriousness.
"Its top secret McNally – if I tell you then you have to keep it to yourself..."
"Did Jerry tell you Traci was pregnant?"
Sam's eyes widened slightly in disbelief, but smiled unknowingly at the excited toothy grin taking over Andy's face. "If you already know why are you asking me to tell you?"
"I already knew because Traci told me...said they wanted you and me to be godparents. I had already told you before..." her smile faltered as she remembered the events that had followed that one way conversation, and she wrapped her fingers around Sam's hand a little bit tighter.
"Andy..."
The sound of Sam's voice pulled her back out of her head, and she widened her smile at him again but the light in her eyes that had dulled slightly didn't brighten with it. "The baby I know about...but no one has said anything to me about a proposal...Is Jerry going to ask Traci to marry him?"
Sam studied her expression for a few moments – trying to gage whether to let her continue along the assumed route she was taking, or whether he should be honest with her. It wasn't a Nash/Barber wedding that they had been talking about – but he knew that now was definitely not the time to mention that. "No."
He didn't realise he had audibly spoken – thought he was running through the possible answers in his head, but as Andy's smile faded and her eyebrows knotted together in confusion as she peered back at him and he knew he had. "I thought..."
"No. It doesn't matter..." He attempted to change the subject, "We talked about the case...about you – not going to your appointments."
"Yeah – well I've had other things on my mind."
"Andy..."
"What? It's not like I don't know what happened...I was there. Talking about it in some stuffy office with someone I've never met before isn't going to change anything."
He raised a pointed eyebrow at her in an indication that he was fully aware of the fact that she had been making excuses, and wasn't going to let it slide. Fortunately she was saved momentarily from having this conversation by the return of a clearly agitated Sarah.
"He's still there...I can't believe he's still loitering around out there." Sarah momentarily stalled, sensing she had walked into the middle of something – but she was too worked up to stay quiet. "I told him to go – said you didn't want to see him...talk to him...but geez...guys persistent! Persistent, and smarmy and urrrgghh – what did you see in him? Can I hit him? Would someone arrest me if I just walked straight back out there and hit him?"
Sam glanced from his sister back to Andy who had become decidedly pale and was attempting to plaster a neutral look on her face that didn't even slot partially into place. He looked back over to Sarah, a silent question evident as to why she was so wound up – but she didn't answer, had moved on to studying Andy's expression instead. Sam knew who she was referring to – of course he did, but for some reason he found himself asking for clarification. "Callaghan?"
He saw Andy tense out of the corner of his eye, and felt something twinge inside him – there was something he wasn't aware of going on and the silent glances being passed between Andy and his sister did nothing to dispel his rising feeling of unease. "What's going on?"
"Nothing..." Andy tugged on his hand to bring his questioning gaze back to her, and tried to pull herself together enough to issue a reassuring smile. "Nothing's going on..."
Sarah snorted in disbelief at her words, and Sam's darkening gaze instantly seeked her out for clarification. She remembered herself, cursed herself as soon as he looked at her and she was reminded of the reality that none of this would sit well with her brother – in fact if he was able to, she knew he would have been outside wringing the blond detective's neck as soon as he knew, but she wasn't going to lie to him. "He wants to apologise..."
"Sarah...don't..." Andy pleaded with her not to say anything, but she knew her attempt feel on deaf ears as soon as Sarah perched herself on the edge of Sam's bed – she could tell by the determined expression on her face. "Sam...It...It doesn't..." She pulled on his hand in an attempt to get him to look at her, but he ignored the gesture – he knew she wasn't going to tell him so he kept his eyes trained on Sarah – waiting for her to speak.
"Apologise for what?"
Sarah took an audible deep breath and levelled a concerned look at her brother. "You have to promise me you're not going to freak out..."
"Apologise for what Sarah?" The frustration of trying to figure out the silent glances and the riddles getting to him, and the question came out harsher than intended – but he didn't apologise, just waited for her to speak. He felt Andy's grip tighten on his hand, and other hand wrap her fingers tightly around his forearm but still resisted the urge to look back her. Sarah glanced over at Andy – it wasn't her place to tell him, but she would if Andy didn't.
"He was in the canteen when we went to get coffee earlier...he wouldn't leave me alone, kept on saying that we needed to talk – eventually I just had to walk away, that's why I came back early...while Jerry was still here, I couldn't..." Andy wasn't looking at him anymore, focusing instead on her hand gripping his arm – her voice sounded distant and shaky, but she still kept talking. "I tried to call him...from the warehouse, before I called you. I tried to call him twice and all I got was his voicemail. That's when I panicked...after the second time, I panicked and I called you. I'm sorry – I shouldn't have called you...I know I shouldn't have called you, that I was wrong – but so was he. I can't let him try and sweet talk his way out of it – apologise, and then everything goes back to normal...I can't..."
Sam reached his other hand – the one that wasn't currently caught up in a McNally death grip – out to her, grazing his fingers gently down over her cheek to brush away the few silent tears that had fallen before nudging her chin up so she had to look at him. "I'm glad you called me." His voice was tight, restrained – he was holding the anger back, he wasn't angry at her – he wanted to skin Luke alive at that precise moment in time, but that wasn't her fault.
"How can you be glad?! I..."
"Andy if you hadn't called me we would never have been able to narrow down the search – it would have taken us ten times as long to find you...I don't even what to think about how that could have turned out. Losing you is not an option for me, ok? This could have turned out a hell of a lot worse."
"You wouldn't be hooked up in a hospital bed with four bullet holes."
"No...I would be dead...worse than dead and in a lot more pain that I am right now, so you need to stop – stop torturing yourself about this." Sam glanced back over to his sister, whose teary eyes had been watching the scene unfold in front of her. "Tell Callaghan that I want to talk to him."
Andy's eyes widened in horror, and she tugged on Sam's hand again to pull his attention back to her. "No! No...Sam – you don't..."
"I'm still bed bound Andy...it's not going to be a rehash of retraining. I want to talk to him."
A/N – sorry this update is almost a week late folks...I very annoyingly got sick, but I'm on the mend now...and have uploaded this offering for you! Please...as always...read...hope you enjoy, and please let me know what you think.
