Sessions II: Nine Months

Chapter 28: The Super Market

They were only supposed to run in and pick up something for dinner and a case of toilet paper. Why? Because he, of course, had forgotten to get some last night when she reminded him via text not five minutes before he left the hospital. At least he claimed he had forgotten. She knew better, however, because he refused to look at her when he had come home empty handed. He was just too lazy to go. Then this morning, he sheepishly handed her the tissue box when she screamed on the toilet because he had used the end of the very last roll they had.

It was cold and rainy and she was not really in the mood for this impromptu shopping excursion. The baby was kicking up a storm and the chicken Caesar salad she had for lunch was giving her a severe case of heartburn. She double stepped to keep up with him as he flew by her across the parking lot. He was always quicker than one would expect a guy with a cane to be. However today he seemed extra speedy. If truth be told, it was more that she was now just exceptionally slow. She was five months along and lugging around a twelve pound basketball in front of her. She wasn't exactly in the running for the four-minute mile.

Impatiently, he held out his palm to her as they approached the automatic door and wiggled his fingers at her when she didn't immediately respond. He wanted a quarter to put in to unlock a shopping cart.

"What? We don't need that, we're just getting a few things, " she said.

"Cripple with one hand and a cane, " he complained extending his hands out to demonstrate. "Not carrying the basket."

"Fine." She rolled her eyes and dug in her purse for her wallet. "I don't want this to take forever." She pushed the coin into his hand.

"And I do?" he questioned shoving her out of the way so he could dislodge the first from the massive train of bent and crooked shopping carts. "Gossip Girl is on the agenda for tonight."

"I hate Gossip Girl, " Cate complained following him into the store.

"Too bad… You made me watch The Way We Were, " he said hanging his cane on the side of the metal carriage and leaning his elbows onto the handle to push it with his arms.

"So for how many years am I going to have to pay for that one, " she objected ignoring the bratty tone that came out of her mouth.

"Five, " he considered this for a moment and then shook his head. "It's Barbara Streisand. That's five years of penance. We watch Gossip Girl."

"Whatever, " she said leading him into the vegetable aisle to grab a bag of salad, some baby carrots and fresh broccoli.

"Apples, " he announced and maneuvered the cart in the direction of the bank of shinny red fruit.

Juggling her three bags of vegetables, she found him haphazardly placing random apples in a bag. Whoa, way too many... "Greg, we don't need that many apples."

"I like apples," he said dumping two more in.

"And you're not even looking at them," she griped incredulously, quickly placing the vegetables in the cart and stopping his hands. "You have to check them for bruises and holes."

He sighed unhappily and thrust the bag at her face. "Here check 'em."

Breathing for patience, Cate grabbed the bag of apples and inspected them for any and all damage. Out of the seven he put in there, four were remarkably good but three had to go. She quickly replaced the damaged apples and deposited them in the cart, which he had abandoned in the thirty seconds it took for the apple exchange. He was now in search of bananas. His impatience and love of all things sweet was kicking in. Shaking her head on a frustrated laugh, she pushed the cart over to him. "No brown spots. They have to have just turned yellow with a little bit of green on the ends."

He stood in front of the banana display looking perplexed. "What difference does it make? Bananas are bananas are bananas. B-bananas. B-a-n-a-n-a-s…"

Cate blinked at him. "Okay, Gwen… bananas with brown spots are icky sweet. I like them when they just turn yellow."

"Ah who cares…" he reached out and grabbed a bag, of brown spotted bananas.

"I care," she replied and put the bag back in exchange for the right kind. "When you're a human garbage disposal who'll eat anything, it might not matter to you, but I don't like my bananas extra sweet."

He raised his eyebrow at her. "That's not what you said last night."

She giggled, despite herself and the serious conversation about bananas, and smacked him playfully on the arm. "Stop. You're such a dirty pig!"

He waggled his eyebrows at her. "And you love my banana. B-a-n-a-n-a-s…" he sang repeatedly as they carried on down the aisle. Suddenly, he halted in the middle of the aisle. "Ooo, I think I'm gonna download that as my new ringtone."

"Please don't."

"I'll make it Wilson's." He was now preoccupied with the interface on his cell phone. He continued to bob his head to the music playing inside his skull as he meandered in front of her in no particular direction. If she were lucky, she could get a few things taken care of as long as she didn't lose him like a wondering toddler in the process. Tugging on his coat sleeve, she directed him over to the organic milk and eggs. She managed to retrieve those things, some cheese and edamames all the while he was engaged with his phone.

Satisfied with his new toy to taunt Wilson with, he snapped his phone shut and replaced it on his belt clip. He picked up a bag of cashews from the organic nut stand and tossed them into the cart before he unceremoniously shoved her off the cart to resume his elbow driving.

Glad she didn't have to push, because it had a wonky walleyed wheel, Cate continued along side him rubbing her hand over her belly. "What do you want to eat for dinner?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. You?"

She sighed. "I don't know, either."

An idea hit him. "Ooo, how about your chili? We haven't had that in a while."

Cate grimaced and felt her stomach turn over. She ran her hand firmly over the top of her belly to settle it. "No, no, no. I have terrible heart burn today. Which reminds me, I need more Tums."

He nodded and turned the cart down the health and beauty aid aisle. "That's probably because Junior's got your stomach up where your lungs should be."

"Yeah, just about," she muttered and took in a shallow breath.

He paused the cart by the antacids. "What flavor?"

"Mint, the soft chews not the hard ones," she amended.

Nodding, he plucked the bottle off the shelf and dropped it into the cart with a clang. He inched a little further down the row and grabbed a bottle of Metamucil, adding that as well.

"I don't need that," she told him. Luckily, she was not constipated… yet.

"I do," he muttered quietly.

Cate slid him a surprised glance. "Maybe you just need to eat more salad."

"Maybe you should just worry about your own poop."

Cate shook her head and then it dawned on her. "It's because you've been taking a hell of a lot more Vicodin lately. Excessive Vicodin use causes…"

"I know what it causes," he grunted. "I've been abusing it for a decade. So get your nose out of my poop."

"Fine," she said with a smirk and turned to continue on their trek making a mental note to switch to brown rice and whole grains from now on.

Coming up on the toothpaste, she remembered that they were almost out of that too. Of course the one she wanted was way down at the bottom of the shelf. "We're out of toothpaste. I can't bend to get it…"

"And I can?" He snorted at her. "There's like twelve more uses out of the tube we have. We don't need it right now."

"And next week I'll be able to bend and get it?"

He rolled his eyes at her.

"Could you please?"

"Fine." She honestly didn't know what he was complaining about, his damn gorilla arms were long enough to reach down that far if he even just slightly bent at the waist. With a smirk he pitched it into the cart. "Happy now?"

"Yes. Thank you." She could hear her mother laughing down at her from Heaven. This was vaguely reminiscent of shopping trips with her father when she was young. House would hate to hear that he even remotely sounded like her father.

They made their way around the corner and Cate realized they were passing the baby aisle. That was one place she never had to go unless she needed Q-tips. Out of curiosity, she hooked her hand on the end of the cart and pulled him in the direction of the baby foods.

"We don't need anything from down here yet," he complained.

"Aren't you even a little curious," she asked.

He shrugged. "Not really."

She ignored his feigned disinterest and looked at the hundreds of different foods in tiny little jars or plastic containers. The further they wandered in, the more it began to smell like that familiar comforting scent of baby powder. She inhaled deeply and smiled. You had to be a coldhearted bastard to not enjoy the smell of baby. Glancing at him out of the corner of her eye, she noticed a smile tipping at the corners of his mouth. When he realized she was watching him, he immediately put on a scowl and pushed on. "Are you going to breastfeed?"

Taken off guard, she considered his question for a moment. That was a good question. She hadn't really thought about it yet. "I don't know. Maybe for a little while in the beginning."

He looked at the different choices of bottles and nipple types and nodded. "How do you know which one to pick?"

She shrugged and lifted a Playtex Nurser package off the rack. "These have been around since I was a kid. They say that because the bag collapses it's the most like a real breast."

"It makes sense," he said. "You could pump it out and then I could feed the baby too."

Cate smiled at him and melted. He wanted to take part in feeding the baby. That was so adorable. Touching her hand to his arm, she looked at him finding his eyes. "We could most definitely do that."

He nodded his head and moved on. "Ok, enough nonsense. Daddy's hungry."

Placing the bottle set back on the shelf, she followed him. "What are you in the mood for that's not too spicy or too rich."

"Umm I don't know, I guess that leaves chicken?"

"Why don't we get one of those rotisserie chickens? It's done already and I don't have to cook, because this is wearing me out and we haven't even gotten to the toilet paper yet."

Turning the cart, he passed the baking, canned goods and juice aisles making a direct heading for the cookie aisle. Cate grimaced. His sweet tooth was unparalleled. Opening her mouth to object, he cut her off with a swift look. "Daddy needs cookies. Period. End of story."

She followed him down the aisle watching the carnage, as there was nothing neither she nor anyone could do about it. One by one, he gently placed them with reverence onto the growing pile of groceries. Two packages of chocolate chip cookies, two packages of fudge stripes, only one of Oreos, which was weird, and two packages of Pepperidge Farm chocolate macadamia nut cookies. Sadly, this would only last him a week. How he managed to never gain a pound was beyond her. She supposed that excessive amounts of testosterone and a rapid metabolism had to do the trick. She, on the other hand, could just smell the cookies and gain a pound. How was this fair?

They left the aisle and made their way to the bread where she picked up a loaf of multigrain and of whole wheat, for his 'problem', some English muffins and some new peanut butter because he ate that like it was going out of style too.

Suddenly, his hip sang out loudly.

A few times I've been around that track

So it's not just gonna happen like that

Cause I ain't no hollaback girl

I ain't no hollaback girl…

He paused and unclipped his cell phone from his belt with a pleased little smile. "It's Wilson."

Oooh, this my Shit , this my Shit

Oooh, this my Shit , this my Shit

Cate rolled her eyes. Gwen Steffani. Ugh, she hated that song. She nodded at him with a flat smile appeasing his childish tendencies. "Excellent."

Pushing the cart across the aisle, she went to the yogurt.

"Hello, you have reached the 'Hollaback Girl Hotline, please state the nature of your shit."

He laughed loudly and Cate ignored him as if she didn't know him and perused the yogurt looking for the thick and creamy kind that she liked. She found them and placed them into the cart while he rambled to Wilson. Vanilla, key lime pie, strawberry banana…

"Get the kind with the Reeses Pieces on top…" he instructed at her. Cate rolled her eyes at him realizing her was talking to her about the 'so called' yogurt and put one in. "Not you, idiot; do you have Reeses Pieces there?" He griped loudly at Wilson making a face and grabbed three more. "Yeah, we made an offer… A lot…. A lot, a lot."

Leaving him trailing behind, Cate moved down the aisle again to the orange juice.

He continued to talk loudly on the phone like he wasn't in a public place. "I don't know… she said as soon as a couple of days maybe a week… Nah, Cate hates her more than Bonnie hates me…"

"Oh, which reminds me, is Cuddy there with him?" Cate asked coming up along side of him with two containers of orange juice. He looked at her confused by her train of thought. Sighing she rolled her eyes. "People who hate you…" she whispered by way of explanation.

"Oh." He mouthed and then spoke into the phone. "Is the Devil's Whore around?" He laughed again. "Ugh, she's not my whore. In this scenario, that would make you the Devil incarnate." He looked at her and moved the receiver. "Why?"

"I need to know if we're still on for pre-natal yoga tomorrow morning."

He brought the receiver back up to his mouth. "She wants to know if they're still going to their yoga for rotund people at the butt-crack of dawn."

"Yes," he answered. "Cool. Sounds good. Yup. Oh and Wilson…" he snapped the phone shut hanging up on him with a devious laugh.

"Why do you do that to him?"

He laughed and stuck his phone back on his jeans. "Because he falls for it every time."

"So what kind of trouble are you two getting into tomorrow? Am I gonna need bail money?"

"No," he made a disgruntled face. "His car is going in for an oil change and we're going to breakfast."

"Spoken like the two old men that you are."

"Whatever," he grumbled. "We need something to do while you two contort yourselves into fat little pretzels for an hour and a half. And then have juice smoothies afterwards and dish…" he added in his best girlish lisp.

She ignored him and pushed the cart, which was now really heavy and difficult to move. "Come on, let's get this chicken and get out of here. We're done."

Taking pity on her, he shoved her out of the way again and propelled the cart forward with a hefty push.

They checked out in record time. $95.67 later, they made their way out of the store.

Cate groaned. Now she had to pee… "Oh shit! We forgot the toilet paper!"

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A/N: I know this chapter is a little shorter than the rest and seems a little like filler, but I wanted to explore the ultimate domesticity of a married couple. What better way then to go food shopping? And who hasn't gone for a few things and come out with cartful forgetting what you originally intended to get in the first place?!

My intended second half of it turned out to really be a stand-alone. It's much shorter than the rest but it needs it own space as it starts a story arc that takes a bit from cannon and spins in my own way. I will post it shortly in a few days, so everyone can catch up on this first. Hope you're still enjoying the ride. Hugs and Kisses!