Losing Grip

It wasn't till sometime later that I realised it was quiet in the room. I looked up out the broken window and blinked at the black air that greeted my eyes. How long had I been here? I moved back from Roxy and gently pulled her arm away from me, smiling at her closed eyes and light breathing. I guess she'd sang until she'd falling asleep.

"Thanks rox" I whispered stroking her cheek before quietly rising to my feet. I looked down at her with an uncertain smile, should I wake her up? She looked too peaceful and tired. I watched a small shiver run through her and bent over her for my duvet cover. I pulled it off the bed and wrapped it over her small frame and stepped back, feeling a brittle smile stretch across my lips while I looked down at her. I definately owed her for this.

I turned around and inched out of the room, turning to silently close the door behind me before making my way to the roof. The cold air snapped at my face and made me shiver but I ignored it. I walked over to sit in my usual spot by the roof ledge and dangled a leg over, smiling at the tingles running up my foot at being suspended metres above the ground.

"Trying to scare the life out of me?" I glared at nothing in particular as her voice echoed in my brain. I didn't want to think about her now. I looked out at the dark school grounds and sighed.

"Beautiful at night isn't it?"

I turned back and tilted my head at Lexy. She was stood leant back in the shadows against the watchtower with a small smile while I studied her. How long had she been there? I must have walked straight past her. I narrowed my eyes at her while I tried to figure out what she was doing here. It could just be a coincidence that we were both up here at the same time but something in the way she shoved off the wall told me she was after something

"What're you doing up Lex?"

"Same as you. Finding some air" she said casually while she walked up to me and sank down against the chimney opposite me with a smile.

I traced her face, watching the exhaustion tattoo her eyes before realising she'd been waiting for me to come out of my room to talk. I leant my head back against the bricks behind me and looked up at the clear sky, tracing patterns in the stars before sighing

"Come out with it then" I smirked when her head snapped up

"With what?"

"Whatever you've been waiting to say to me all night"

" I haven't been waiting all night.." I rolled my eyes at her evasive tone and turned my face down to look at her

"Well?"

She narrowed her eyes at me and gave me a piercing stare like she was searching for something. My hands twitched uncomfortably on my knees and she followed the movement, taking in my bruised and torn fingers with a stunned expression before looking back at me with concern

"Are you okay?"

"What do you think?" I muttered moving my hands back behind me out of sight. She caught the annoyed pitch in my voice and nodded

"Listen, about Kelly.."

"Don't even go there" I snapped, the dangerous edge coming back to my voice while I glared at her

"Belle you can't pretend.."

"She doesn't want to talk Lexy. Take the hint and get lost already"

I looked back at Roxy and smiled gratefully to her, holding back a laugh when she walked up to us and nudged Lexy's shoulder with her knee, her non verbal cue for the girl to leave. Lexy looked back at me with a look that clearly stated she wasn't done with our talk and picked herself up off the floor. She brushed past Roxy, giving the rockstar an annoyed glare which Roxy fully returned, before strutting off the roof. I watched Roxy glare back at Lexy until the door closed before she turned back to me with an easy smile.

"Thanks for leaving me in bed" she said with a cheeky grin as she sat down in Lexy's spot. I rolled my eyes at her and kicked her knee. She chuckled and scrubbed her fringe away from her eyes before looking back at me with a controlled calculated look

"How're you..." I rolled my eyes again and cut over her

"Feeling? Just peachy thanks" I didn't mean to snap at her but I was getting sick of being asked. She gave me a lopsided grin and shook her head

"I was actually gonna say how're you not frozen" I blinked at her then shrugged, leaning back with closed eyes and letting a shiver roll across my shoulders .

"Hug?" I looked back at her and grinned

"Offering?"

"You know it" She opened her arms out to me and I sighed and moved over to sit next to her, feeling better the moment her warm skin touched mine.

"Much better" she sighed squeezing me while I nodded in agreement.

We sat silent for a couple of minutes, both of us caught up in our own thoughts to talk. It didn't matter though. Just sitting there with her was enough conversation for me. She played with my right hand while she thought, absentmindedly twisting her fingers through mine while I stared ahead at the tiles on the roof. Not really thinking about anything just staring numbly ahead while I built a wall in my head, slowly shutting everything Kelly behind it

"Belle?"

"Hmm?"

"How are you feeling? Like really?"

"Terrible" Her arms tightened around me and I looked up smiling as she glared out at the school grounds

"Better now you're here though" I added waiting for her to smile. She ignored me and kept glaring out at the grounds. I pulled my hand free of hers and twisted round to face her

"Rox?" I prodded her arm and she looked down at me with a sigh

"You have no idea how much I want to kill her"

"Join the club" I muttered looking back at her with a small smile, "She only hit you though"

"I'm not bothered about her hitting me. That's nothing. It's her hurting you that's pissed me off" she looked back at me with a fierce and angry frown. I met her eyes, admiring the way the blue seemed to sparkle even when she was angry. I raised a hand to her shoulder and squeezed it with a sad smile

"I'll live"

"That's not the point Belle. She shouldn't have.."

"Can we please not talk about this?" I pleaded pulling my knees up and hugging them. Her eyes softened and she nodded before reaching out for my hand again

"Okay"

"Sorry" I mumbled resting my right cheek against my knees and looking up at her. She shrugged and raised our linked hands up to her mouth

"It's okay" she whispered lightly brushing her mouth along the bruises on my left hand before settling back next to me with a tired sigh. I tilted my head at her and watched the way her skin twitched under the shiver she was trying to fight. She was beautiful wasn't she? Not like Kelly, but then no one was like Kelly. That girl was a goddess in her own right. Roxy though, she was different. Brilliant in a subtle way so that you had to work to see it. There was something considerably admirable in that

"What're you smiling at?" she asked giving me an amused grin when I jumped. Was I smiling? I hadn't even noticed. I shrugged at her and looked away, grinning despite myself when she pulled me against her

"Tell me" she muttered, her voice dipping into a small almost pleading whisper. I felt myself shiver under it and met her eyes. I felt myself fall cornered in the different shades of blue. I'd never realised how amazing they were before. The patterns in her irises closely resembled a bright supernova. I felt my heart pick up and watched her tilt her head at me, smirking when she felt it pound against her arm. She slowly moved down closer to me, pulling me tighter against her in a way that said what she was going to do and gave me enough warning so I could move away if I wanted to. I think I more than surprised her when I grabbed her shirt and pulled her the rest of the way to me

"Belle.." I ignored her and ran a hand up her neck to keep her close. She groaned under my mouth and I couldn't help but think it was one of the sexiest things I'd ever heard. She pulled her hands up to my shoulders and gently pulled me back

"Are you sure?" she asked staring down at me with a serious expression. I ran my hand down from her neck to her shirt again. We both knew I was upset and irrational but I didn't care. I was sick of fighting against everything just so I could please everyone else. If I regretted this tomorrow then so be it. I'd made up my mind.

"Definitely" I muttered pulling her back to me. She grinned and pulled her hands down to my waist, slowly guiding me back to the floor while she hovered over me with a smirk. I rolled my eyes and pulled her back down to me, pinning her to me with a slow kiss that made her groan again. I tilted my head back after a while for air and stared up at the stars as she made her way down my body, leaving small bites in her wake while one thought rolled through my head

I'm just as bad as her aren't I?